WEBVTT 00:00.389 --> 00:03.153 This is XFM. 00:05.155 --> 00:08.178 An old shack in Leicester Square, London. 00:08.619 --> 00:11.462 Not the discount theatre ticket shack, a different one. 00:12.083 --> 00:16.588 Suddenly, two lonely figures emerge from the flipping cold outside. 00:23.127 --> 00:24.948 Oh, I'm so cold. 00:25.268 --> 00:26.649 Hug me, hug me. 00:27.529 --> 00:28.530 I don't want to hug you. 00:28.550 --> 00:30.391 Please hug me, otherwise I'll die. 00:30.451 --> 00:31.351 I can't hug you. 00:31.731 --> 00:33.993 Oh god, you're so frigid. 00:34.373 --> 00:35.013 Yes, that's it. 00:35.093 --> 00:36.654 My arms are frozen to my sides. 00:36.874 --> 00:37.835 I mean emotionally. 00:37.995 --> 00:43.958 No, I mean the perspiration from my armpits has frozen my arms to my side. 00:46.513 --> 00:47.093 Hello, listeners. 00:48.014 --> 00:48.774 This is XFM. 00:49.034 --> 00:51.375 Burning my Arctic Monkeys CDs. 00:51.655 --> 00:52.856 It's New Year's Eve Eve. 00:52.936 --> 00:54.356 Oh, that's so deliciously warm. 00:55.477 --> 00:57.958 And welcome to our very special Christmas show. 00:57.998 --> 01:07.002 You know, we appreciate the Christmas the day itself has gone, but like a kind of nuclear explosion of love, the fallout is still in the air. 01:07.182 --> 01:08.703 Yeah, I've still got a bit of Christmas music. 01:08.763 --> 01:13.105 We're going to stick that one on the ghetto blaster in the corner of the Christmas shack. 01:13.265 --> 01:14.406 We're Adam and Joe, by the way. 01:15.086 --> 01:15.807 Thanks for listening. 01:15.987 --> 01:24.472 And for the next two hours, we'll be bringing you rock music from bands like the Fratellis and the Kooks and the Killers and all the K-bands. 01:24.592 --> 01:25.632 And here's the thing, Joe. 01:25.672 --> 01:26.553 This is a surprise for you. 01:26.773 --> 01:27.013 What? 01:27.113 --> 01:27.994 It's not even two hours. 01:28.254 --> 01:28.794 It's three. 01:29.254 --> 01:29.515 Is it? 01:29.575 --> 01:30.995 Yeah, we're here for three hours. 01:31.075 --> 01:31.536 Oh, God. 01:34.137 --> 01:35.678 Well, I might leave for the third hour. 01:35.738 --> 01:37.098 Joe's leaving for the last hour, yeah. 01:37.178 --> 01:38.438 No, it's going to be great, listeners. 01:38.999 --> 01:40.319 And we're going to do all sorts of things. 01:40.419 --> 01:41.459 I've bought Adam a present. 01:42.119 --> 01:43.340 I didn't buy you anything. 01:43.460 --> 01:44.860 I know, but I've bought you a present. 01:44.880 --> 01:45.480 Oh, thanks, man. 01:45.600 --> 01:55.383 And I'm going to spin the suspense of what the present is out for an amazingly long time in an incredibly effective way that shows that I'm the master of suspense. 01:55.883 --> 01:56.564 Hey, you know what? 01:56.604 --> 02:00.825 That's a good idea, because this has been the year of teasing people with boxes. 02:01.525 --> 02:06.969 You're talking about Deal or No Deal, not just running up to people in the street with a box. 02:06.989 --> 02:09.270 No, I'm going, I got a box that you ain't got my box. 02:09.290 --> 02:10.251 Yeah, not that. 02:10.351 --> 02:12.213 No, no, I'd never do that. 02:12.513 --> 02:17.316 But also, apart from Deal or No Deal, of course, Lost, I think of Lost as a box show, you know what I mean? 02:17.416 --> 02:20.558 Yeah, we've discussed this in some detail already on our podcast listeners. 02:20.598 --> 02:25.242 On our no award-winning podcasts available to download immediately for none money. 02:25.362 --> 02:27.603 Yeah, so all sorts of exciting things coming up. 02:28.424 --> 02:29.885 What are you going to be talking about, Adam? 02:30.424 --> 02:36.307 I'm gonna be looking back over the years Joe in a kind of a satirical way. 02:37.267 --> 02:46.112 I'm gonna be raising an eyebrow and chatting in rather a funny way about some of the things that we've been talking about in the news this year. 02:46.992 --> 02:51.214 Well that's exciting and of course everything is coming here from our Christmas shack. 02:51.534 --> 02:52.655 You know we've had some letters 02:54.547 --> 02:56.888 from people who don't believe that this is an actual shack. 02:57.228 --> 02:57.908 Oh, really? 02:57.988 --> 03:02.409 Yeah, they don't believe that we do it from a shack in the Mork Pole. 03:03.229 --> 03:04.270 Read out one of the letters. 03:06.470 --> 03:10.792 Dear Adam and Joe, Last year I listened to your Christmas special. 03:11.432 --> 03:12.592 Special, question mark? 03:13.192 --> 03:15.733 More like not very special, exclamation mark. 03:16.133 --> 03:17.313 You weren't really in a shack. 03:17.933 --> 03:19.634 Yours sincerely, Doris McWhirter. 03:20.974 --> 03:22.795 You made that letter right? 03:22.875 --> 03:23.395 I did not. 03:24.545 --> 03:25.546 I didn't, man, I swear. 03:25.706 --> 03:28.868 It's just written in temporary ink. 03:28.968 --> 03:30.328 Well, do you know how I know you made that up? 03:30.569 --> 03:30.769 What? 03:31.169 --> 03:33.890 Doris McWhirter. 03:34.111 --> 03:35.371 She's Norris's mum. 03:35.411 --> 03:36.452 She's Norris's mum. 03:36.652 --> 03:39.494 I tell you what, let's get into the show by playing some music right now. 03:39.974 --> 03:43.676 And this is a whole bunch of music that we've probably never heard because we haven't been on the radio for a while. 03:43.956 --> 03:47.158 Hey, stop giving the impression that we're not in touch with cutting-edge indie music. 03:47.278 --> 03:47.999 Sorry about that. 03:48.059 --> 03:50.460 This is an Italian band called the Fratellis. 03:52.341 --> 03:53.722 And this is Whistle for the Choir. 03:57.321 --> 04:01.004 Well, I must say, I thought that was a little naive by the kooks. 04:01.244 --> 04:02.104 Yeah, cause it isn't. 04:02.184 --> 04:03.045 It's called naive. 04:03.085 --> 04:03.685 Exactly. 04:03.745 --> 04:04.266 By the kooks. 04:04.506 --> 04:07.008 Hey, have you heard of that band called The Vue? 04:07.748 --> 04:08.148 The Vue? 04:08.208 --> 04:08.749 V-U-E? 04:08.909 --> 04:09.710 The Vue? 04:10.150 --> 04:10.350 No. 04:10.750 --> 04:12.491 And their song's called Same Jeans. 04:13.112 --> 04:13.812 Have you heard of that? 04:13.852 --> 04:14.613 Xanthi's heard of that. 04:14.833 --> 04:15.674 Have you heard of that, Adam? 04:15.834 --> 04:16.034 No. 04:16.414 --> 04:17.576 Ooh, oldie man. 04:17.696 --> 04:19.018 I'm an oldie grandpa. 04:19.558 --> 04:25.747 Listen, I've heard I've heard of Oasis that they shout one of them is very badly behaved. 04:26.007 --> 04:27.709 They're pretty much dead blur 04:28.559 --> 04:28.819 Yeah? 04:28.999 --> 04:29.959 They're pretty much dead. 04:29.999 --> 04:34.341 They live in a house in a very big house in the country and uh menswear. 04:34.781 --> 04:37.281 Are we gonna I wonder if we're gonna play same jeans by the view. 04:37.361 --> 04:54.786 We do have a bit of blur for the oldies and it's it's even a classic very early blur track white stripes scott matthews the strokes you see it's pretty and radiohead look it's come on it's more or less business as usual here we shouldn't get too freaked out by the newness so tomorrow of course is new year's eve 04:55.686 --> 04:56.647 It's exciting, isn't it? 04:56.847 --> 04:57.488 It's exciting. 04:57.528 --> 04:58.549 Christmas is all over. 04:58.569 --> 04:59.689 Do you know what? 04:59.810 --> 05:01.091 I've been invited to a party. 05:01.291 --> 05:01.611 No. 05:02.031 --> 05:03.393 And do you know who's holding the party? 05:04.608 --> 05:07.550 Television magician, Derek Brown. 05:07.770 --> 05:08.710 He's your ace. 05:09.051 --> 05:11.292 He's one of my showbiz mates, yeah. 05:11.732 --> 05:13.733 And he invited me to the party. 05:14.194 --> 05:17.075 In fact, do you know when he invited me to the party? 05:18.056 --> 05:19.937 He invited me during another party. 05:20.778 --> 05:22.599 And do you know whose party that party was? 05:22.939 --> 05:23.519 Matt Lucas. 05:23.579 --> 05:23.879 Yeah! 05:24.100 --> 05:25.280 Hey, how was that party? 05:25.440 --> 05:26.241 Oh, it was amazing. 05:26.781 --> 05:28.504 Couldn't go to that party now listeners. 05:28.864 --> 05:30.867 We're talking about Matt Lucas's special. 05:31.808 --> 05:41.061 I married a man party It was all over the papers in late December It was a while ago two weeks ago now, but Adam couldn't come right. 05:41.121 --> 05:42.223 I had a gig that night I 05:42.403 --> 05:42.883 Yeah, you fool. 05:42.903 --> 05:43.583 I couldn't get out of it. 05:43.604 --> 05:43.824 What a joke. 05:43.844 --> 05:44.724 But it was extraordinary. 05:44.784 --> 05:47.025 Maybe we'll talk about it in a little more depth later. 05:47.405 --> 05:48.626 But it was amazing, Adam. 05:48.746 --> 05:49.346 And you know what? 05:49.386 --> 05:52.247 My career is going to really lift off now, thanks to that party. 05:52.487 --> 05:54.288 You just think about it in career terms. 05:54.328 --> 05:54.588 Well. 05:54.828 --> 05:59.310 If I was there, I would have been celebrating the union of Matt and his boyfriend, Kevin. 05:59.350 --> 06:00.470 The union of the snake. 06:00.690 --> 06:02.811 The union of the snake. 06:03.912 --> 06:06.993 But no, you were just thinking about it in terms of networking. 06:07.013 --> 06:08.594 Yeah, I use it for networking, exactly. 06:08.614 --> 06:09.614 It's all about networking. 06:09.634 --> 06:10.975 Well, I have my Palm Pilot out. 06:11.975 --> 06:13.336 And I'm wearing a business suit. 06:13.396 --> 06:14.556 Getting in with Elton John. 06:14.696 --> 06:14.976 Yeah. 06:15.256 --> 06:16.577 One of my favorite things happened. 06:16.977 --> 06:18.298 We were in the reception area. 06:18.378 --> 06:20.899 It was a fancy dress party, a panto party. 06:21.519 --> 06:22.840 And I was chatting to some friends. 06:23.240 --> 06:26.981 And you know, often I do, I'm like physically quite ungainly. 06:27.642 --> 06:32.824 I'm liable to make a gesture and knock over a glass of wine. 06:33.904 --> 06:39.927 Or make another gesture and like just poke someone in the face with my elbow. 06:40.487 --> 06:41.588 Do you ever do that kind of thing? 06:42.528 --> 06:45.090 And it ruins the story, it's just terrible. 06:45.690 --> 06:48.872 Anyway, I was happy that David Walliams did something very similar. 06:49.352 --> 07:01.699 He was saying hello to me and there was a woman next to us and she was just taking a sip of champagne and he made a gesture and he knocked the bottom of her champagne glass with his elbow and it smashed into her teeth. 07:01.799 --> 07:03.160 Bad wife! 07:04.020 --> 07:05.161 And it was so funny. 07:05.541 --> 07:06.261 I'm so sorry. 07:06.781 --> 07:08.722 I'm really, really very, very, very sorry. 07:08.742 --> 07:09.923 I bet that hurt as well. 07:10.103 --> 07:11.523 Luckily the glass didn't smash. 07:12.184 --> 07:14.245 But you know, there's no accounting for that kind of thing. 07:14.765 --> 07:18.267 And really, social situations like that are a physical obstacle course. 07:18.287 --> 07:20.928 They're very dangerous in that kind of respect. 07:20.948 --> 07:22.328 That's why I don't go to parties anymore. 07:22.428 --> 07:22.749 Really? 07:22.769 --> 07:23.409 That's lethal. 07:23.889 --> 07:27.692 It would be, you know, she could easily have had her entire face split open. 07:27.952 --> 07:34.057 You know, if the glass had shattered and it had gone up her nose into her brain... It could have been hellish. 07:34.297 --> 07:36.318 She would have died in the most grisly manner. 07:36.338 --> 07:38.560 There should be public information films about that kind of thing. 07:39.100 --> 07:41.662 When you're at a party, remember to control your elbows. 07:41.962 --> 07:43.784 Otherwise you could slice somebody's face open. 07:46.065 --> 07:47.406 Especially if you're Dave Walliams. 07:47.547 --> 07:47.827 Yeah. 07:47.987 --> 07:48.787 Shall we play more music? 07:48.807 --> 07:48.928 Yes. 07:50.121 --> 07:55.467 This time, ladies and gentlemen, we're gonna play a track by a band called Just Jack. 07:55.947 --> 07:57.709 I don't even know who Just Jack are. 07:59.455 --> 08:01.436 That was the Zootons with Valerie. 08:01.656 --> 08:02.836 That's an old classic, isn't it? 08:03.096 --> 08:04.337 That's an XFM classic from 2006. 08:04.557 --> 08:04.837 Yeah. 08:04.857 --> 08:04.937 From 1906. 08:05.337 --> 08:04.937 1906. 08:05.417 --> 08:08.758 Yes. 08:09.239 --> 08:10.259 Well done, the Zootons. 08:10.499 --> 08:10.939 Good stuff. 08:11.039 --> 08:12.440 What a year it's been for the Zootons. 08:12.800 --> 08:14.380 They seem to go from strength to strength. 08:14.520 --> 08:14.860 Did they? 08:14.880 --> 08:15.241 Yeah. 08:15.781 --> 08:18.442 Other things in the news this year, that was a little segue for you. 08:19.662 --> 08:27.365 Well, I've got a comedy routine about something that was in the news this year, which was Christmas itself. 08:28.243 --> 08:28.503 Wow. 08:28.783 --> 08:28.984 Yeah. 08:29.384 --> 08:31.005 What, Christmas itself was in the news? 08:31.205 --> 08:31.465 Oh, yeah. 08:31.885 --> 08:32.366 How so? 08:33.026 --> 08:34.607 Well, uh... Oh, I know why. 08:34.627 --> 08:35.247 Yeah, yeah. 08:35.288 --> 08:36.488 Because it's being banned. 08:36.909 --> 08:37.329 Exactly. 08:37.369 --> 08:37.629 Right? 08:37.789 --> 08:37.929 Yeah. 08:38.009 --> 08:39.450 It's being called Winterville. 08:39.670 --> 08:41.531 So here's my comedy routine. 08:41.832 --> 08:43.853 Okay, this is a topical comedy routine, right? 08:43.873 --> 08:44.153 Yeah, yeah. 08:44.493 --> 08:45.894 Imagine you're in, like, a little club. 08:46.214 --> 08:47.976 You're at the Christmas shack. 08:48.336 --> 08:50.557 We've just got a few people in from around Leicester Square. 08:50.577 --> 08:51.438 They were just wandering around. 08:51.558 --> 08:52.138 All right, folks. 08:52.178 --> 08:53.139 I love topical comedy. 08:53.419 --> 08:54.019 I love topical comedy. 08:54.039 --> 08:55.659 Yeah, because I like to get back at the news. 08:56.100 --> 08:56.620 Same here. 08:57.040 --> 08:57.400 Yeah. 08:57.660 --> 09:01.881 And it's the most enjoyable kind of comedy because everyone goes, yeah, I heard that about that. 09:02.061 --> 09:04.441 What's that Radio 4 show that gets back at the news? 09:04.741 --> 09:05.341 The Now show? 09:05.521 --> 09:05.981 Yeah. 09:06.661 --> 09:06.921 Yeah. 09:07.041 --> 09:07.462 Like that. 09:07.822 --> 09:08.582 The Now show. 09:08.882 --> 09:09.482 Mock the week. 09:09.722 --> 09:10.342 That's the one. 09:10.402 --> 09:11.082 Mock the week. 09:11.262 --> 09:12.382 Tease the news. 09:12.422 --> 09:13.283 Tease the news. 09:14.003 --> 09:14.303 Yeah. 09:14.443 --> 09:15.783 That's what we're going to do. 09:15.803 --> 09:16.863 The news is so serious. 09:17.343 --> 09:17.603 Right. 09:17.843 --> 09:19.324 Here we go with tease the news. 09:20.164 --> 09:20.564 Christmas. 09:21.363 --> 09:24.044 All right, everybody have a good Christmas? 09:24.524 --> 09:25.605 You can join in, Joe-ins. 09:26.325 --> 09:28.386 Yeah, not so quite, sort of. 09:28.766 --> 09:30.107 Yeah, everyone have a good Christmas? 09:30.467 --> 09:34.029 Or should I say a good holiday break? 09:34.569 --> 09:43.333 Because thanks to the PC Brigade, you're not actually allowed to call it Christmas anymore, are you? 09:43.993 --> 09:45.694 Or you might offend someone. 09:46.894 --> 09:58.462 You've got to say something like happy holidays or seasons greetings or to put it more accurately happy two-week shopping eating and boozing break. 10:01.384 --> 10:05.106 I bet Jesus isn't too happy about that though is he? 10:05.667 --> 10:13.512 Nailed to a cross, rose again from the dead, doesn't even get a holiday named after him because it might upset someone who's not into Jesus. 10:17.235 --> 10:35.509 so so what are they gonna do about Easter probably call it something like chocolate weekend and of course of course saying summer holidays might offend people who don't like the summer 10:46.439 --> 10:47.500 The audience is with me. 10:49.642 --> 10:52.905 Yeah, so they're gonna have to rename summer. 10:52.925 --> 10:56.488 They're gonna have to call it evidence of global warming months. 10:57.869 --> 10:59.931 You've been great. 10:59.971 --> 11:00.391 Thanks a lot. 11:00.411 --> 11:00.692 Good night. 11:03.074 --> 11:04.455 That's good recorded laughter. 11:04.835 --> 11:05.616 Where do you think they got? 11:05.636 --> 11:08.298 Are those people genuinely laughing at something or are they pretending to laugh? 11:08.338 --> 11:08.839 Play them again. 11:12.025 --> 11:13.246 It makes me want to laugh. 11:14.268 --> 11:16.850 You know, a good comedy show would just be people laughing. 11:17.051 --> 11:17.471 Yeah. 11:17.571 --> 11:19.253 That would probably smash through the ratings room. 11:19.273 --> 11:20.054 That's true, man. 11:20.094 --> 11:20.595 That's true. 11:20.615 --> 11:21.375 It is infectious. 11:21.616 --> 11:25.380 But that's of course why they put canned laughter on shows, because it is nice to hear people laughing. 11:25.400 --> 11:29.965 Yeah, but I tell you what, after a while... After a while it would just become depressing. 11:30.065 --> 11:31.407 They're having an amazing time. 11:31.467 --> 11:31.967 Check it out. 11:32.167 --> 11:32.508 Yeah, but... 11:34.507 --> 11:43.438 I reckon that would sustain for about, that would sustain for, she's loving it, but listen, in 90 seconds she'll be sadder than she's ever been in her life before, because it'll just turn into the sound of bedlam. 11:43.698 --> 11:44.019 Yeah. 11:44.399 --> 11:47.122 You know, there's nothing more depressing than people laughing at stuff that isn't funny. 11:47.262 --> 11:48.424 Like the Russell Brand show. 11:48.684 --> 11:51.868 Hey, I think he's very, very, very, very. 11:52.088 --> 11:52.868 I think he's good, man. 11:52.908 --> 11:53.649 I think he's a genius. 11:53.849 --> 11:59.850 But on his Channel 4 show on a Friday night, when you said Bedlam, that's the first thing that popped into my head. 11:59.990 --> 12:00.150 Yeah. 12:00.391 --> 12:01.611 Because it is total Bedlam. 12:01.691 --> 12:03.051 A Victorian crazy house. 12:03.111 --> 12:04.552 But that's what the kids like, isn't it? 12:04.652 --> 12:05.512 I don't know. 12:05.592 --> 12:06.432 No, the kids don't like it. 12:06.632 --> 12:07.533 Energetic people. 12:07.593 --> 12:10.334 You know, the Russell Brand show gets lower figures than Blunder. 12:10.754 --> 12:11.194 Does it? 12:11.294 --> 12:13.054 Put that in your pipe and smoke it. 12:13.074 --> 12:13.915 Thank you very much. 12:13.995 --> 12:14.555 I'd love to. 12:15.335 --> 12:16.115 Music time now. 12:16.155 --> 12:16.836 Music time now. 12:16.916 --> 12:17.896 Hey, and in a second. 12:17.956 --> 12:18.116 What? 12:18.607 --> 12:20.187 It might be time to tease your present a bit more. 12:20.467 --> 12:21.988 I've bought Adam a Christmas present. 12:22.028 --> 12:22.768 He doesn't know what it is. 12:23.068 --> 12:24.468 We're going to reveal it at the end of the show. 12:24.608 --> 12:27.149 Tease the news, tease the presents, tease the hair. 12:27.209 --> 12:27.809 It's a big tease. 12:27.949 --> 12:28.869 It's a big tease. 12:29.349 --> 12:31.790 Now music, this is the first of our three plays. 12:31.950 --> 12:35.411 This is a band that both myself and Joe enjoy very much. 12:36.051 --> 12:36.611 It's Phoenix. 12:37.411 --> 12:40.032 And this is a track from their album that was out this year. 12:40.152 --> 12:44.213 I forget the name of the album, but the track is called Consolation Prize. 12:44.233 --> 12:45.193 What a relief. 12:49.437 --> 12:50.477 That was the Killers with Bones. 12:50.718 --> 12:52.378 This is Adam and Joe on XFM London's 104.9. 12:53.339 --> 12:55.259 Welcome to our Christmas shack. 12:55.720 --> 12:57.861 Now I've bought Adam a Christmas present. 12:58.081 --> 12:58.381 Whoa. 12:59.001 --> 13:00.302 And it's pretty exciting stuff. 13:00.442 --> 13:02.102 Because we didn't see each other over Christmas. 13:02.162 --> 13:03.283 This is the first time we've met. 13:03.863 --> 13:04.463 Yeah. 13:04.523 --> 13:05.824 Since the beginning of the holidays. 13:06.224 --> 13:08.845 And do you, I just wonder whether you think you know what it is? 13:10.046 --> 13:12.487 Well... Should I tell you how much it cost? 13:12.527 --> 13:13.587 Yeah, go on then. 13:13.928 --> 13:13.587 $5.95. 13:13.948 --> 13:20.591 $5.95. 13:15.168 --> 13:20.591 That's a good price zone, because you can really get some pretty surprisingly good stuff. 13:20.831 --> 13:22.091 For $5.95, yeah. 13:23.252 --> 13:27.254 I'm thinking on the basis of some of your previous gifts, 13:28.435 --> 13:36.881 That it's going to be maybe personalized in some way or with a strong personal slant. 13:37.562 --> 13:38.863 It's certainly targeted. 13:39.743 --> 13:41.104 It's something that will be useful. 13:41.245 --> 13:42.726 I know you will find useful. 13:43.246 --> 14:03.057 right is it like a chest hair trimmer no that would be useful though you don't want to trim your chest hair though I was gonna say well you can trim it but don't shave it otherwise you get an irritating stubble is it musical it does make noises oh well it's not the crazy frog because that was last year 14:03.337 --> 14:04.938 Yeah, that would be worth less than $5.95. 14:04.978 --> 14:07.940 Last year I bought Adam a Crazy Frog keyring. 14:08.340 --> 14:08.801 It was good. 14:08.861 --> 14:09.381 We smashed it. 14:09.661 --> 14:11.002 We smashed it into tiny pieces. 14:11.142 --> 14:13.304 Well, we're going to find out towards the end of the show what your present is. 14:13.404 --> 14:14.905 What's been the craze this year, though? 14:14.945 --> 14:15.705 That's what I was thinking. 14:15.725 --> 14:18.147 There's no, like, Billy Bass type thing in the shops, is there? 14:18.387 --> 14:19.648 There hasn't really been a craze. 14:19.928 --> 14:22.590 I tell you what, the craze has basically been YouTube, hasn't it? 14:22.970 --> 14:23.370 Right. 14:23.390 --> 14:28.014 The big technological craze of 2006 was YouTube. 14:28.114 --> 14:29.635 High definition, that was a 2006 thing. 14:29.655 --> 14:29.855 The Wii? 14:29.875 --> 14:30.075 The Wii? 14:33.417 --> 14:34.398 Well, that's even a 2007. 14:34.459 --> 14:36.481 Is that even out in this country yet? 14:36.561 --> 14:38.624 Yeah, but you had to have pre-ordered one to get one. 14:39.044 --> 14:43.450 Did you know that Nintendo has now become cockney rhyming slang for going to the loo? 14:43.770 --> 14:44.751 I'm off to have a Nintendo. 14:45.212 --> 14:46.173 Oh, no way. 14:46.193 --> 14:46.734 Is it really? 14:46.934 --> 14:47.415 With the kids? 14:47.455 --> 14:47.595 Yeah. 14:48.456 --> 14:48.917 Well, good. 14:49.337 --> 14:50.138 I mean, what is the logic? 14:50.198 --> 14:51.640 I still don't know what Wii stands for. 14:51.861 --> 14:53.062 It's like Wii as in us. 14:53.402 --> 14:53.683 Yeah. 14:53.903 --> 14:55.005 It's like a pluralistic thing. 14:55.045 --> 14:55.305 Sure. 14:55.665 --> 14:57.348 And... But it's spelled W-I-I, right? 14:57.388 --> 14:57.608 Yes. 14:57.848 --> 14:59.911 Because the eyes are supposed to look like men. 15:00.752 --> 15:01.493 People playing. 15:01.953 --> 15:02.634 People, men? 15:02.815 --> 15:03.095 Yes. 15:03.736 --> 15:05.358 It's been very successful for Nintendo. 15:05.598 --> 15:09.181 So it's not an acronym, it's not like world intelligence? 15:09.261 --> 15:13.125 No, it's also a meaningless word that means something in all languages. 15:15.207 --> 15:16.308 Space! 15:16.788 --> 15:18.970 If you met a space man, could you say wee? 15:19.410 --> 15:20.952 And he'd know what you were talking about. 15:20.972 --> 15:22.793 Yeah, he'd just think you were making a fun noise. 15:23.474 --> 15:24.915 Wee! 15:25.196 --> 15:25.956 It's very clever. 15:26.277 --> 15:26.477 Yeah. 15:26.817 --> 15:27.538 It's very clever. 15:28.484 --> 15:34.149 We talked about this before, but I mean, I wonder how they got beyond the fact that it just sounds like Wee Wee. 15:34.829 --> 15:37.292 I mean, at some stage, they're too clever, man. 15:37.332 --> 15:38.993 They knew, they knew it would stick in people's heads. 15:39.233 --> 15:40.334 That's, that's amazing. 15:40.374 --> 15:42.036 Yeah, and then they knew people would get over it. 15:42.176 --> 15:44.197 To kind of, to have that kind of resolve, you know? 15:44.217 --> 15:45.298 They're brilliant, they're brilliant. 15:45.418 --> 15:49.001 Where you get the naysayers in going, Yeah, obvious problem, guys. 15:49.042 --> 15:53.645 Sorry to mention it, but, uh, are you not worried about the fact that it sounds like, uh, Wee Wee? 15:54.746 --> 15:55.887 What are you going to call it next? 15:56.887 --> 15:58.087 The poo machine? 15:59.928 --> 16:00.628 And they just say yeah. 16:00.788 --> 16:02.629 That's probably what Sony are going to come out with next. 16:02.849 --> 16:03.309 Exactly. 16:03.369 --> 16:04.050 The poo station 3. 16:04.530 --> 16:05.230 The poo box. 16:05.910 --> 16:07.431 That's what Robbie Williams came out with. 16:08.911 --> 16:12.013 This was also the year that Robbie went slightly down the YouTube. 16:12.373 --> 16:17.355 He did and Take That came back and Robbie went back to where he came from. 16:17.375 --> 16:18.515 A little bit of justice there. 16:18.615 --> 16:19.996 A little sprinkling of justice. 16:20.036 --> 16:20.996 Yeah, pop justice. 16:21.236 --> 16:24.258 You know, that's the disadvantage of being really successful. 16:24.898 --> 16:26.279 That's why you and I are alright, Adam. 16:26.439 --> 16:27.559 Because we're always going to go up. 16:27.579 --> 16:28.060 Seriously, yeah. 16:28.380 --> 16:31.681 Well, we've just, you know, we just, we just sort of... We've got nowhere to drop. 16:31.782 --> 16:32.222 Exactly. 16:32.242 --> 16:33.082 We've got nowhere. 16:33.142 --> 16:36.144 I'm not saying that we're not successful, but we just sort of bubble under. 16:36.304 --> 16:36.484 Yeah. 16:37.124 --> 16:38.505 People, some people know us and like us. 16:39.102 --> 16:40.162 Most people don't know who we are. 16:40.182 --> 16:41.643 The stakes are relatively low. 16:41.663 --> 16:42.503 Yeah, and that's fine. 16:42.803 --> 16:42.963 Yeah. 16:43.123 --> 16:46.124 You know, it's not until you rise high that you can fall. 16:46.404 --> 16:48.425 You don't want something because you might lose it. 16:48.625 --> 16:49.105 Exactly. 16:49.165 --> 16:50.085 Yeah, who wants things? 16:50.325 --> 16:55.787 All those celebrities who try to make friends with Robbie Williams, be his number one pal. 16:56.267 --> 16:57.787 They've wasted their time now. 16:57.827 --> 16:59.468 They're all going round to Gary Barlow's house. 16:59.528 --> 16:59.868 Yeah. 17:00.288 --> 17:01.748 Gary, I'm back. 17:02.129 --> 17:02.689 It's true though. 17:03.409 --> 17:04.029 Robbie Williams. 17:04.129 --> 17:04.909 Robbie Williams. 17:07.768 --> 17:08.188 What's that? 17:08.368 --> 17:09.049 Are you puking? 17:09.389 --> 17:09.749 Dunno. 17:10.750 --> 17:11.610 Let's have some more music. 17:11.630 --> 17:13.151 This is Adam and Joe on XFM. 17:13.411 --> 17:18.254 It's time to play Primal Scream with Sometimes I Feel So Lonely. 17:18.434 --> 17:19.615 Have you ever done a Primal Scream? 17:20.195 --> 17:21.676 You know... We could do one right now. 17:21.696 --> 17:22.296 We're in a studio. 17:22.316 --> 17:23.557 This is the best place to do a scream. 17:23.837 --> 17:26.319 What, you mean just scream as loud as you possibly can? 17:26.359 --> 17:28.760 The kind of thing they do on kind of business bonding trips. 17:28.780 --> 17:33.022 That was as loud as I could scream. 17:33.042 --> 17:33.983 Did that sound good? 17:34.043 --> 17:35.043 Yeah, it did sound quite good. 17:35.284 --> 17:35.884 Go on, you do one. 17:38.080 --> 17:38.620 That was my one. 17:38.640 --> 17:46.142 That was joke, that was great. 17:46.342 --> 17:47.862 That was Cassabian with me plus one. 17:47.882 --> 17:49.483 This is Adam and Jo on XFM London's 104.9. 17:49.743 --> 18:00.325 We're coming to you live from our special festive shack in Leicester Square and if you've been listening to the show so far you'll know that we've got a topical comedian in the studio today. 18:02.466 --> 18:03.247 and a little audience. 18:03.407 --> 18:05.368 Sorry, not in the studio, in the Christmas shack. 18:05.388 --> 18:06.649 Yeah. 18:07.149 --> 18:12.633 And he's going to do a little more kind of topical comedy about some of the highlights of the year, which will be great. 18:12.653 --> 18:15.896 All right, ladies and gentlemen, nice to be back. 18:16.616 --> 18:21.279 We all had a few more drinks, feeling a bit more loosened up. 18:22.700 --> 18:25.042 Oh dear, I didn't go down well. 18:25.863 --> 18:26.883 David Cameron. 18:27.364 --> 18:30.046 I was thinking about David Cameron the other day. 18:32.412 --> 18:36.936 I wonder what kind of games they were playing at Christmas round at David Cameron's house. 18:38.478 --> 18:41.181 Something like Hunt the policy maybe. 18:42.992 --> 18:44.053 Pass the buck. 18:47.815 --> 18:50.676 Pin the blame on the Labour donkey. 18:52.157 --> 18:53.538 I got him back with that one. 18:53.638 --> 18:54.819 Spin the story. 18:57.000 --> 18:57.780 Sherrards. 19:00.102 --> 19:04.564 I'm just going to take a little break and be back shortly. 19:04.604 --> 19:05.205 Thanks very much. 19:06.980 --> 19:10.261 Topical comedy there on XFM, London's 104.9. 19:10.561 --> 19:17.403 And off the wall, look at the year there from our resident topical comedian. 19:17.783 --> 19:18.844 It's music time now. 19:18.864 --> 19:19.884 Star of Tease the News. 19:20.084 --> 19:25.066 Star of Tease the News, the Radio 4's least funny topical comedy show. 19:25.326 --> 19:26.666 It's up for 20 Sony's. 19:27.786 --> 19:29.467 This is Jet with Are You Gonna Be My Girl? 19:35.592 --> 19:37.613 That was Razorlight with Before I Fall to Pieces. 19:37.653 --> 19:40.234 This is Adam and Joe here on New Year's Eve. 19:40.474 --> 19:44.276 Eve in our Christmas season shack here in Leicester Square. 19:44.936 --> 19:46.456 And it's nice and warm in here. 19:46.496 --> 19:49.938 We've got our fire going, listening to a bit of Christmassy music still. 19:50.618 --> 19:52.759 Only a short album of Christmassy music we've got. 19:52.779 --> 19:56.220 So it kind of goes round and round on the stereo there in the corner. 19:56.821 --> 20:03.623 And we're just looking back over the years, events, the highlights, the low lights, the handbags, the glad rags. 20:03.743 --> 20:04.464 The fairy lights. 20:04.904 --> 20:05.044 Yeah. 20:05.544 --> 20:08.767 So listen, I was saying earlier that I've been invited to Darren's Brown House. 20:08.787 --> 20:09.167 What? 20:09.207 --> 20:09.587 No, go on. 20:09.748 --> 20:10.848 Darren's Brown House. 20:12.009 --> 20:12.590 Got up too early. 20:13.411 --> 20:19.936 So listen, I was saying earlier that I've been invited to Darren Brown's house for a New Year, you know, New Year's Eve celebration. 20:20.256 --> 20:21.437 Do you think his house is brown? 20:21.997 --> 20:22.398 Probably. 20:23.098 --> 20:23.619 Just checking. 20:24.539 --> 20:28.441 He invited me verbally and he said, check your inbox for the invitation. 20:28.521 --> 20:30.242 Check your emails for the invitation. 20:30.722 --> 20:31.242 Haven't had it yet. 20:31.282 --> 20:31.962 Haven't had it? 20:32.162 --> 20:32.403 No. 20:32.923 --> 20:34.003 It's running out of time. 20:34.063 --> 20:34.744 It's tomorrow night. 20:34.824 --> 20:35.024 I know. 20:35.084 --> 20:36.664 What do I do in that situation? 20:37.345 --> 20:38.665 Do I, A, turn up? 20:39.446 --> 20:42.727 B, think, well, he was just being polite, but he doesn't really want me to come? 20:42.987 --> 20:50.069 What about... See, send him an email saying, hey, Darren, you mentioned the party, but I haven't got the invite. 20:50.169 --> 20:51.510 Has there been a mix up? 20:51.790 --> 20:53.431 Has there been a snafu? 20:53.731 --> 20:54.291 A snafu. 20:54.811 --> 20:55.351 What do you think? 20:55.651 --> 21:03.254 I would say, well, you don't say that, but you drop him an email saying, hey, Darren, just checking you've got my correct email address. 21:03.274 --> 21:03.654 Do you think? 21:03.994 --> 21:06.375 What if he what if he's trying to mess with me? 21:08.047 --> 21:10.268 He's a magic, magic mind-messer. 21:10.388 --> 21:11.688 He is famous for messing with minds. 21:11.708 --> 21:13.168 He is, he does it for a living. 21:13.588 --> 21:15.029 And he's messing with my mind. 21:15.289 --> 21:16.609 What if he's manipulating me? 21:16.869 --> 21:17.589 Oh my goodness. 21:17.829 --> 21:19.030 Oh my god! 21:19.730 --> 21:28.191 What if he gets my email and goes... That's exactly what I knew he'd do. 21:28.612 --> 21:30.732 Right under my brown thumb. 21:31.312 --> 21:33.173 And he's probably watching me. 21:33.733 --> 21:34.913 He's probably in my attic. 21:35.313 --> 21:51.040 yeah he's probably floating above on the ceiling of my room of this shack probably of the if this shack yeah and somewhere in the shadows where we can't see it god he's probably got a you just can't trust him you can't trust him no he can't be trusted 21:51.920 --> 21:54.321 And then imagine if you did get the invite anyway. 21:54.401 --> 21:56.062 What kind of party would that be? 21:56.302 --> 21:57.743 Do you know, I was at dinner with him once. 21:57.983 --> 21:58.224 Right. 21:58.564 --> 22:00.065 And there were lots of people around the table. 22:00.725 --> 22:06.148 And he was asking everybody how, like, how manipulable they thought they were. 22:06.948 --> 22:11.991 Well, you know, if we were, for instance, to be put under hypnosis, do you think you'd be able to be put under hypnosis? 22:12.371 --> 22:12.611 Right. 22:12.912 --> 22:14.292 Are you hypnotizable? 22:14.472 --> 22:15.073 What did you say? 22:15.273 --> 22:15.853 I said no. 22:16.233 --> 22:17.074 No, absolutely not. 22:17.094 --> 22:17.874 Do you know what he said to me? 22:18.315 --> 22:18.915 Yes, you are. 22:19.175 --> 22:20.336 You're probably the most one. 22:21.673 --> 22:44.394 the most he didn't he grammatically constructed the sentence better than that he put all the other words in to make it you are probably the most one wrong joel you're probably the most one but i can get my head around that i thought is that is that true no that's not or he's just flipping the script to try and pull a rug out from under my tortoise classic brown it's classic brown yeah it's all pretend isn't it 22:44.634 --> 22:45.194 It's all protected. 22:45.234 --> 22:46.915 It's like the law of the playground. 22:46.935 --> 22:48.275 That's what you do in the playground. 22:48.575 --> 22:48.835 You know? 22:48.855 --> 22:50.215 Who's the biggest wally? 22:50.656 --> 22:51.156 You are. 22:51.416 --> 22:52.996 No, you are by saying that. 22:53.016 --> 22:53.296 Oh, clever. 22:53.416 --> 22:53.736 Clever. 22:53.856 --> 22:55.037 You know, that's all he's doing. 22:55.097 --> 22:56.417 No, but he's cleverer than that. 22:56.437 --> 22:57.457 I knew you were going to say that. 22:57.777 --> 23:01.538 You're the biggest wally because the one that says the biggest wally is the wally biggest. 23:01.798 --> 23:03.719 I'm going to be a nervous wreck at his party. 23:05.313 --> 23:07.034 I can't wait to find out what happens. 23:07.094 --> 23:10.696 He's a nice chap though, isn't he Darren? 23:26.425 --> 23:28.146 Of course he is, I'm just being silly. 23:30.407 --> 23:31.808 Or am I? 23:31.968 --> 23:33.409 Or am I? 23:33.869 --> 23:36.131 It's gonna be a tense New Year's Eve for me anyway, listeners. 23:36.151 --> 23:37.332 I can't wait to find out about it. 23:37.392 --> 23:38.232 Let's have some music. 23:38.632 --> 23:41.174 This is the automatic with Raoul. 23:41.754 --> 23:42.275 Raoul! 23:42.495 --> 23:44.196 Hey, this isn't even out yet. 23:44.236 --> 23:44.596 Really? 23:44.656 --> 23:46.077 No, this is coming out in January. 23:46.157 --> 23:52.741 Wow, the 8th of January, they're playing the Brixton Academy on the 23rd of February on the NME awards tour, and it was originally released back in April. 23:54.025 --> 23:58.189 So that rather puts the light to what you said about it not being out yet. 23:58.209 --> 23:59.570 Yeah, a little bit. 24:00.351 --> 24:02.934 Great to hear this one again from the automatic. 24:06.311 --> 24:13.274 Juice Boxx, that was from last year of course, 2005 I mean, and it was by The Strokes. 24:13.354 --> 24:15.034 Has it been a good year for The Strokes, 2006? 24:15.074 --> 24:17.155 Because 2005 was their year, wasn't they? 24:17.195 --> 24:21.537 They exploded all over the scene, making wicked videos and being the coolest people in the world. 24:21.857 --> 24:23.778 What happened in 2006 for The Strokes? 24:24.358 --> 24:26.459 You know, Joe, 2001 was really that year. 24:26.719 --> 24:27.359 Was it? 24:27.399 --> 24:27.940 Was it really? 24:27.960 --> 24:27.940 2001? 24:28.460 --> 24:30.220 That was Strokes year. 24:30.341 --> 24:30.661 Really? 24:31.241 --> 24:32.361 So what's been happening? 24:32.561 --> 24:33.702 What happened for them last year? 24:34.198 --> 24:35.939 Well, their second album came out around 2003. 24:36.299 --> 24:37.779 Did it make a big splash? 24:37.839 --> 24:38.899 It made a decent splash. 24:38.919 --> 24:39.800 It's a good album. 24:39.900 --> 24:40.140 Yeah. 24:40.380 --> 24:43.281 But 2006, was it? 24:43.401 --> 24:47.122 Saw the release of First Impressions of Earth, I think the album was called, album number three. 24:47.142 --> 24:47.582 Right, that's right. 24:47.662 --> 24:48.863 It was out on January the 2nd. 24:49.143 --> 24:49.903 Boring. 24:50.423 --> 24:51.483 Was it boring? 24:51.563 --> 24:52.464 Boring. 24:52.484 --> 24:52.624 Ooh. 24:53.884 --> 24:57.527 Now is that your opinion, or is that the opinion of music pundits? 24:58.207 --> 25:00.289 I think it's pretty much agreed upon. 25:00.409 --> 25:02.470 Well, well meaning but boring. 25:02.510 --> 25:03.451 It's over for the strokes. 25:03.851 --> 25:05.573 Yesterday's news, why are we playing them? 25:05.593 --> 25:10.896 Like he was doing a song about one of the songs just goes, I've got nothing to say. 25:10.916 --> 25:13.338 I can't even remember the tune because there wasn't one. 25:13.538 --> 25:15.219 But the refrain is I've got nothing to say. 25:15.299 --> 25:17.221 And it's kind of a sort of in-joke. 25:17.361 --> 25:18.081 Yeah, yeah. 25:18.121 --> 25:19.202 Kind of meta comment. 25:19.222 --> 25:19.482 Yeah. 25:19.522 --> 25:23.285 Because to say that is in itself saying something, which is what you missed. 25:23.445 --> 25:25.526 Adam, thicky bad taste in music. 25:26.586 --> 25:27.027 Buxton. 25:27.047 --> 25:29.228 This is Adam and Joe, XFM, London's 104.9. 25:30.248 --> 25:31.268 You know what's going to happen now? 25:31.549 --> 25:33.769 I'm still reeling from thicky bad taste in music. 25:33.830 --> 25:35.130 I'm just defending the strokes. 25:36.030 --> 25:37.271 Yeah, that was quite damning wasn't it? 25:37.411 --> 25:37.811 It was. 25:38.431 --> 25:39.352 I'm going to give you your present. 25:39.752 --> 25:40.252 Oh wow! 25:40.352 --> 25:41.313 It's Chrissie present time. 25:42.133 --> 25:43.013 I'm giving one to Adam. 25:43.073 --> 25:46.315 Adam's bought me nothing, listeners, because he's a callous man. 25:46.775 --> 25:47.855 but I'm gonna give him a present. 25:47.975 --> 25:51.576 I'll tell you the problem with you though around this because your birthday's just before Christmas. 25:51.596 --> 25:52.417 Correctamundo. 25:52.477 --> 25:54.317 I shot my bolt with your birthday present. 25:54.377 --> 25:54.837 Did you now? 25:54.957 --> 25:55.338 Yeah. 25:55.398 --> 25:56.478 Which you liked didn't you? 25:56.558 --> 25:57.078 I loved it. 25:57.118 --> 25:57.698 Yeah good. 25:58.379 --> 26:03.200 So okay there's the present I'm sliding it across the disc jockey console. 26:03.260 --> 26:05.761 It's wrapped in a page of newspaper. 26:06.881 --> 26:11.564 That was supposed to be like, if you hadn't said that, it would just sound like paper. 26:11.884 --> 26:14.886 You know, certain corners can be cut on radio. 26:15.807 --> 26:17.788 Yeah, but look at what page it is, look at the headline. 26:17.808 --> 26:21.290 Sorry, England surrendered the ashes in record time yesterday. 26:21.310 --> 26:22.591 It's from about two weeks back. 26:22.711 --> 26:48.268 yeah Freddie Flintoff yeah blah blah blah you see your cricket fan so here we go what what is this we're looking at a book I think ladies and gentlemen yeah but don't bend it too much there might be something else too large to be a DVD it's a kind of long finish but it's like it's DVD proportions but larger taking the Sun Sports page off the present now free CD included I can see it says on the corner there 26:49.744 --> 26:53.906 Hello, there's a man, there's a picture of a bloke. 26:53.926 --> 26:54.746 There's exciting stuff. 26:55.847 --> 26:58.168 Voiceovers, a practical guide. 26:58.268 --> 27:03.691 Now you see listeners, Adam Buxton makes a lot of money doing voiceovers. 27:03.711 --> 27:06.332 You've probably heard them on the telly and stuff. 27:06.912 --> 27:11.454 And I think he needs some advice from a professional to get his career going. 27:11.494 --> 27:16.697 So this is a very long book all about the art of voiceovers and it comes with a CD, doesn't it Adam? 27:16.957 --> 27:17.938 It does, I'm loading it up. 27:17.998 --> 27:22.641 And the CD will have some guidance on how to do a really good voiceover. 27:22.681 --> 27:23.661 I bet it's good advice. 27:23.721 --> 27:29.885 I think it's probably a good book because I found it like in the remainder pile of a, remainder pile of a secondhand bookstore. 27:30.886 --> 27:31.126 Yeah. 27:31.186 --> 27:31.866 What does it say on the back? 27:31.906 --> 27:32.567 Read the thing on the back. 27:33.373 --> 27:37.395 Voiceovers explains and teaches the skills of voicing radio and television commercials. 27:37.815 --> 27:45.139 It's useful for readers with no previous theatrical training for those who have been through drama school and for experienced members of the profession. 27:45.459 --> 27:45.879 That's me. 27:45.919 --> 27:47.960 That's me. 27:48.000 --> 27:51.722 The book includes scripts written for adverts, documentaries, training films, and radio drama. 27:51.802 --> 27:57.825 Advice is given on how to find work, and there are sections on making your own demo tape, working in a voice studio, interpreting text, et cetera. 27:58.285 --> 27:59.025 So that sounds good. 27:59.045 --> 28:01.547 Let's have a listen to track one on the CD. 28:02.347 --> 28:03.948 We went out for a meal last night. 28:05.149 --> 28:07.652 It was all most enjoyable. 28:07.672 --> 28:10.234 But mother came too. 28:11.815 --> 28:15.818 When we took her home, I gave her a box of chocolate. 28:17.745 --> 28:19.727 That is quite sexy, isn't it? 28:19.987 --> 28:21.788 So presumably you're supposed to play that. 28:21.808 --> 28:27.652 You reach a point in the book where it says, now play track one to see how a sexy voiceover should be done. 28:27.672 --> 28:30.634 But yeah, but that wasn't supposed to be sexy, was it? 28:30.795 --> 28:31.055 Yeah. 28:31.095 --> 28:35.078 Because it was an older woman giving another woman a box of chocolates. 28:35.938 --> 28:37.119 Surely, surely that was sexy. 28:37.139 --> 28:37.559 I've got to find out. 28:37.579 --> 28:38.640 They went out for a meal. 28:39.141 --> 28:44.845 Okay, so what that actually was, here are some good and bad examples of microphone technique. 28:45.785 --> 28:48.346 and the effect of different processes on a speaking voice. 28:48.766 --> 28:50.807 Track one was a delightful evening. 28:51.967 --> 28:53.528 Well, it doesn't say, so what? 28:53.988 --> 28:55.109 Let's hear a bad example. 28:55.549 --> 28:55.829 Okay. 28:56.089 --> 28:57.169 Which track is a bad example? 28:57.189 --> 28:59.230 Track two, a disastrous evening. 28:59.490 --> 28:59.790 Okay. 29:00.190 --> 29:01.691 We went out for a meal last night. 29:01.711 --> 29:03.692 It was almost enjoyable. 29:03.712 --> 29:05.392 His mother came too. 29:05.412 --> 29:08.894 When we took her home, I gave her a box of chocolates. 29:09.574 --> 29:10.774 Chocolates, she said. 29:11.414 --> 29:12.575 Shows how much you care. 29:14.164 --> 29:14.965 What's wrong with that? 29:14.985 --> 29:17.966 Well, just the delivery is to laissez-faire. 29:17.986 --> 29:19.287 It was just a different person. 29:19.807 --> 29:26.091 But the trick, the thing is, it's tricky because they have to have a good example of someone doing a bad delivery. 29:26.271 --> 29:29.814 But the good example was just very, very posh, wasn't it? 29:29.834 --> 29:30.154 Yeah. 29:30.654 --> 29:33.596 And then the bad example was not quite the point. 29:34.090 --> 29:34.490 Here we go. 29:34.670 --> 29:40.174 Do you want to hear a good example of how to do a rap and hardcore collection advert? 29:40.314 --> 29:40.574 Yes. 29:40.734 --> 29:41.155 What's that? 29:41.195 --> 29:41.515 Hang on. 29:41.575 --> 29:43.576 What's a rap and... Oh, like a compilation, you mean? 29:43.796 --> 29:43.977 Yeah. 29:44.797 --> 29:46.218 Rap and hardcore collection. 29:48.900 --> 29:49.901 That's what they're called, isn't it? 29:49.921 --> 29:50.661 This is how you do it. 29:50.941 --> 29:51.341 Excuse me. 29:51.722 --> 29:53.403 Do you have rap and hardcore collection? 29:54.517 --> 29:57.038 It's the greatest Rap and Hardcore collection ever! 29:58.058 --> 30:06.140 65 Rap and Hardcore originals featuring Dina Carroll, Simon Harris, Evie Dee, Frankie Paul, and many more! 30:06.561 --> 30:11.822 It's a full compact dish set for only £9.99 at a dealer near you, now! 30:12.262 --> 30:13.242 Oh that was too hardcore! 30:13.262 --> 30:14.923 That's how you do Rap and Hardcore! 30:14.963 --> 30:18.264 Yeah you talk like this as if you're from the streets, yeah! 30:18.664 --> 30:19.864 And you get a little woman! 30:20.305 --> 30:21.785 You get a little woman to do it! 30:22.065 --> 30:24.547 Is there an example of a bad rap and hardcore collection advert? 30:24.787 --> 30:26.788 No, I think that was a classic one. 30:26.908 --> 30:27.708 What a brilliant present. 30:27.889 --> 30:29.289 That is an amazing present. 30:29.309 --> 30:30.250 That's such a good present. 30:30.450 --> 30:30.930 You know what? 30:31.070 --> 30:34.112 I think I'm going to make a lot more money next year out of my voiceovers. 30:34.172 --> 30:34.433 You know? 30:34.453 --> 30:35.513 Thanks to this book. 30:35.713 --> 30:35.913 Nope. 30:36.554 --> 30:36.674 XFM. 30:39.130 --> 30:40.390 Well, that was good, wasn't it? 30:40.751 --> 30:42.511 I think they're going to be very big next year. 30:42.551 --> 30:44.912 That's a band called the Arctic Monkeys. 30:44.952 --> 30:47.373 A funny sounding name for a band, certainly. 30:47.913 --> 30:49.414 But what a sound they've got. 30:49.534 --> 30:50.994 Yeah, it says here they're hotly tipped. 30:51.154 --> 30:53.055 The hotly tipped Sheffield Quartet. 30:53.515 --> 30:55.456 So, you know, that's got to be true, hasn't it? 30:55.676 --> 30:55.956 Yeah. 30:56.336 --> 30:58.177 It was a big year for the Arctic Monkeys. 30:58.237 --> 31:00.318 I'd say they were the pop cultural phenomenon of 206. 31:01.698 --> 31:04.840 Well, I've written a few- And I mean 206. 31:05.240 --> 31:04.840 206. 31:05.721 --> 31:08.683 I've written a few things down that made an impact in my world. 31:09.203 --> 31:11.004 Yeah, what, your kind of highlights of the year? 31:11.185 --> 31:11.525 Yeah. 31:12.205 --> 31:12.706 Let's hear them. 31:13.066 --> 31:19.750 Apart from the Arctic Monkeys, TV for me didn't get that much better than Celebrity Big Brother right at the beginning of the year. 31:20.131 --> 31:23.933 Right, featuring George Galloway's like cat activity and all that sort of stuff. 31:23.953 --> 31:24.133 Yeah. 31:24.233 --> 31:30.558 And Michael Barrymore's Nervy B. That kind of cataclysmic confrontation between Galloway and Preston. 31:31.198 --> 31:31.418 Yep. 31:31.698 --> 31:37.861 Hard to believe that this time last year, we didn't know who Chantelle was. 31:39.001 --> 31:39.702 Hard to believe. 31:40.142 --> 31:43.343 And now... She's nowhere, everywhere. 31:43.443 --> 31:45.044 We've forgotten who she was. 31:45.564 --> 31:46.265 What's she doing? 31:46.365 --> 31:50.206 She just did a series on E4 and now she's been just put down, hasn't she? 31:50.266 --> 31:51.407 What was her series called? 31:51.447 --> 31:52.867 Chantelle's Secrets or something? 31:52.987 --> 31:56.529 Chantelle's, yeah, Secrets or something is what it was called. 31:56.829 --> 32:01.513 She was a nice person, but I think that she was mishandled, don't you? 32:01.934 --> 32:03.235 Yeah, I don't know really. 32:03.415 --> 32:04.896 She's perfectly nice, but is that enough? 32:05.077 --> 32:09.180 Because the book and everything, her catchphrase was, oh my god. 32:09.641 --> 32:11.602 I tell you who makes me genuinely angry. 32:11.763 --> 32:11.983 Who? 32:12.283 --> 32:12.843 Is Nikki. 32:13.664 --> 32:15.445 She's got a show called Princess Nikki. 32:15.505 --> 32:17.226 I had the misfortune to watch that the other day. 32:17.466 --> 32:26.769 That's just a show about an idiotic woman who just won't work or make any effort at all and is just a complete scumbag, basically. 32:27.630 --> 32:27.910 Why? 32:28.010 --> 32:28.250 What? 32:28.310 --> 32:28.550 Why? 32:28.630 --> 32:29.611 What are they doing? 32:29.671 --> 32:30.671 Why have her on telly? 32:31.231 --> 32:32.772 The other day she was working in a chippy. 32:33.272 --> 32:35.993 They asked her to put some crabs in a box. 32:36.573 --> 32:39.915 She screamed like a toddler and ran away. 32:40.736 --> 32:43.202 I don't want to do it. 32:43.883 --> 32:45.006 I can't. 32:45.147 --> 32:46.891 I want slimy. 32:50.362 --> 32:50.942 What is the point? 32:50.962 --> 32:55.783 And then outside this chippy, there are about 500 people with camera phones taking pictures of her. 32:56.603 --> 32:57.424 What's the idea? 32:59.204 --> 33:00.424 It just makes me depressed. 33:00.484 --> 33:02.725 It's the kind of thing that makes me feel like an old man. 33:03.185 --> 33:04.245 Well, it's only going to get worse. 33:05.005 --> 33:05.445 Do you think? 33:05.565 --> 33:07.786 Imagine what 2007 has in store. 33:07.826 --> 33:09.226 In reality television terms? 33:09.246 --> 33:10.987 Depth plumbing activities, yeah. 33:11.027 --> 33:12.047 Wow, I can't. 33:12.167 --> 33:13.827 It's mind-numbing. 33:13.867 --> 33:15.888 I'm hoping they'll reach the bottom and have to go the other way. 33:16.248 --> 33:17.348 You know, like come full circle. 33:17.828 --> 33:19.809 No, they'll dig through, they'll find another one underneath. 33:19.849 --> 33:29.335 What about, you know, amazingly... What about getting Richard Dawkins, like, a house full of creationists and, like, scientists? 33:29.715 --> 33:34.978 You know, a massively heavyweight, intellectual ideas-based big brother. 33:35.658 --> 33:41.479 That's a good idea because probably what would happen is it would just boil down to being exactly the same as every other one, you know what I mean? 33:41.899 --> 33:42.479 Just tiffs. 33:42.699 --> 33:44.300 Yeah, because... Personality conflicts. 33:44.320 --> 33:49.121 ...that format, it would probably turn out that that format just brings everyone down to their basis level anyway. 33:49.141 --> 33:50.261 To like an animal level. 33:50.281 --> 33:51.361 Exactly. 33:51.381 --> 33:51.501 Wow. 33:51.721 --> 33:58.583 What if you don't put them in a house, but just have them correspond in letter form? 33:59.163 --> 33:59.403 Yeah. 34:00.223 --> 34:04.084 Or just... And you just get the letters read out by an army colonel. 34:05.290 --> 34:06.591 called Brigadier Johnson. 34:06.671 --> 34:07.612 Now you're talking. 34:08.293 --> 34:16.401 And every night for two hours he'd read the letters out in front of a grey background with a bell in the background. 34:16.542 --> 34:21.346 And for Christmas, the Christmas special he'd have a glass of port while he was doing it. 34:21.767 --> 34:26.592 And late at night instead of footage of them in the bed you'd just have shots of the letters. 34:27.621 --> 34:48.825 Slightly too far away to reach But they'd be there what about that and when it got really cool big letters the letter would be dear sir I'm sorry to say that I must complain in the strongest terms about your comments from last week that would almost be too racy yeah, that would bet the heat magazine would go mental that would be number one if then I 34:49.045 --> 35:08.761 things to watch that's the world I'm waiting for okay it's all coming up in 2007 this is Adam and Joe on XFM London's one of 4.9 you're listening to our New Year's Eve Eve special live from the festive shack in Leicester Square shall we have some more music okay now I'm gonna play some semi difficult and slightly ridiculous music uh-oh 35:09.525 --> 35:12.487 This is from one of my favourite albums this year, Squarepusher. 35:13.868 --> 35:15.329 With his album Hello Everything. 35:16.210 --> 35:19.512 And this is a track, this is probably one of the most accessible tracks on the album. 35:19.752 --> 35:20.973 Probably one of the most accessible pieces ever done. 35:20.993 --> 35:21.654 Is he like a rave artist? 35:22.194 --> 35:23.495 Squarepusher, no no no. 35:23.695 --> 35:27.218 Because that name always makes me think of like a rave artist. 35:27.318 --> 35:31.141 Well no, it's like Aphex Twin type mad beats and stuff. 35:31.181 --> 35:34.983 It makes me think he might be on some kind of hip hop and hardcore collection. 35:35.364 --> 35:36.584 No, he's almost like a kind of jazz... 35:38.886 --> 35:51.955 okay crusty but he happens to really like playing extremely complicated nutty heavily programmed songs on his computer and on his bass guitar and stuff anyway this is a track called welcome to europe enjoy 35:58.288 --> 36:01.969 There we go, that was the White Stripes with my doorbell, yeah? 36:02.229 --> 36:03.710 I've been thinking about my doorbell. 36:03.850 --> 36:04.130 Really? 36:04.250 --> 36:04.610 Yeah. 36:04.690 --> 36:06.491 My doorbell's too flipping loud. 36:07.131 --> 36:10.092 It's like Buffalo Bill's doorbell in Silence of the Lambs. 36:10.312 --> 36:11.193 I know, that's no joke. 36:11.213 --> 36:11.613 Makes me jump. 36:11.633 --> 36:12.673 Yeah, yeah, yeah, that's true. 36:12.733 --> 36:14.474 It's terrifying, it's a terrifying doorbell. 36:14.734 --> 36:18.215 We've got a telephone in the kitchen with the ring is much too loud, you know? 36:18.415 --> 36:19.616 You know what doorbells I liked? 36:19.756 --> 36:21.817 I like doorbells in the 70s, like in sitcoms. 36:21.937 --> 36:23.197 Bing bong, ding dong. 36:23.257 --> 36:24.338 Yeah, that's a good one. 36:24.358 --> 36:25.058 Or electronic ones. 36:28.081 --> 36:28.462 What's that? 36:28.542 --> 36:29.182 A chicken one? 36:30.244 --> 36:31.024 That's electronic. 36:33.507 --> 36:35.229 But yeah, what about your doorbell? 36:37.132 --> 36:39.554 The doorbell is not so bad, it's the phone that's too loud. 36:39.634 --> 36:41.256 Right, it's probably got a volume switch. 36:41.997 --> 36:42.937 No, no, no, no. 36:43.477 --> 36:44.158 Okay, it hasn't. 36:44.598 --> 36:48.939 This is a new single from Jamie T. This is called Calm Down Dearest. 36:48.999 --> 36:53.060 It's the follow up to If You Got The Money from his debut album Panic Prevention due out in January. 36:53.440 --> 36:55.740 He's playing the Astoria on the 24th of January. 36:55.760 --> 36:56.540 That would be a great gig. 36:56.740 --> 36:58.641 I haven't heard this one, but here's how I bet it goes. 37:05.003 --> 37:05.804 But let's find out. 37:06.685 --> 37:06.965 Right now. 37:13.717 --> 37:15.238 That was Radiohead with Street Spirit. 37:15.258 --> 37:16.859 This is Adam and Joe on XFM London's 104.9. 37:18.040 --> 37:20.442 Happy New Year's Eve Eve, listeners. 37:21.682 --> 37:24.284 Yeah, good luck if you're getting set to go to a party. 37:24.304 --> 37:26.666 Joe's going to an exciting celebrity party, as we've heard. 37:26.706 --> 37:27.526 We hope, anyway. 37:27.546 --> 37:27.846 We hope. 37:27.967 --> 37:40.555 I've kind of been invited to Darren Brown's party in a magical way, but he hasn't sent me the invitation, so maybe I should expect some kind of a psychic message, or maybe I should just sort of absorb the invitation from signs around town. 37:41.055 --> 37:41.295 Yeah. 37:41.536 --> 37:41.796 You know? 37:42.136 --> 37:44.017 So what will you do if you're not invited, though? 37:44.357 --> 37:45.197 Just be unhappy. 37:45.658 --> 37:46.178 Stay at home. 37:46.478 --> 37:48.859 Feel that I've been locked out of the magic circle. 37:50.099 --> 37:51.680 I wonder who else would be at the party. 37:51.780 --> 37:52.280 Magic men. 37:52.741 --> 37:53.501 All the magic men. 37:54.081 --> 37:54.461 Blame. 37:54.481 --> 37:55.562 Paul Zenon, David Blame. 37:55.882 --> 37:58.023 Paul Daniels, David Copperfield. 37:58.323 --> 38:03.665 The masked magician certainly won't be invited because he gave away all the secrets on Bravo and he's a pariah. 38:03.925 --> 38:04.526 Ali Bongo? 38:04.926 --> 38:06.226 Ali Bongo might be there, yeah. 38:06.687 --> 38:09.788 He's probably serving the drinks or just cleaning up after. 38:10.404 --> 38:12.527 What about the tranny magician? 38:13.929 --> 38:14.610 Faye Presto? 38:14.750 --> 38:15.471 Faye Presto? 38:15.871 --> 38:16.532 Is she a tranny? 38:16.713 --> 38:17.133 Yeah. 38:18.215 --> 38:18.735 I don't know. 38:18.895 --> 38:24.303 No, I think Darren's kind of, you know, he's quite a sophisticated, slightly evil. 38:25.064 --> 38:26.526 You know, he's one of the dark magicians. 38:26.566 --> 38:27.307 He's a black magician. 38:27.687 --> 38:27.848 Yeah. 38:28.248 --> 38:30.669 Yeah, and those are sort of fun, good-time party magicians. 38:31.150 --> 38:36.052 Okay, um, this is Adam and Joe on XFM, London's 104.9, on New Year's Eve Eve. 38:36.072 --> 38:38.273 Will you tell us more about Matt Lucas's wedding party in a bit? 38:38.293 --> 38:40.314 Sure, do you want me to do it now, or shall we tease it? 38:40.855 --> 38:41.515 The big tease. 38:42.095 --> 38:43.536 Let's tease it, let's play some more music. 38:43.576 --> 38:44.517 Let's do a big tease, yeah. 38:44.837 --> 38:46.478 Let's play, uh... Let's do a Jamie tease. 38:46.758 --> 38:47.678 Let's play a free play. 38:48.319 --> 38:50.460 This is one of my discoveries of the year, listeners. 38:50.540 --> 38:50.920 What was that? 38:51.180 --> 38:52.060 It was Jamie tease. 38:52.501 --> 38:52.761 Nice. 38:53.261 --> 38:56.643 This is a guy called Dudley Perkins, and this is a very lazy sort of, uh, 38:57.164 --> 38:57.765 sort of song. 38:58.106 --> 39:00.372 Good for if you've just woken up and are feeling a bit groggy. 39:00.412 --> 39:01.836 That's a good name Dudley Perkins. 39:01.957 --> 39:02.859 It's called Flowers. 39:06.829 --> 39:12.693 That was McCalmont and Butler with Yes, this is Adam and Joe on XFM 104.9, a very happy New Year's Eve eve to all our listeners. 39:12.733 --> 39:20.397 We're just entering the third hour of our Saturday show, coming live from our special festive shack in snowy Leicester Square. 39:20.497 --> 39:23.199 When we say snowy, we mean that euphemistically. 39:23.359 --> 39:29.703 Yeah, well, there's also a small weather system just above Leicester Square that we're feeling that... Yeah, it's chemical snow, it's fake snow. 39:29.743 --> 39:31.324 We've had it brought in from Hollywood. 39:32.065 --> 39:41.778 it's Charlie yeah it's the name of the man that's doing the snow exactly it's a bloke called Charlie he does fake snow thanks for listening everybody we'll see you next week bye 39:42.990 --> 40:09.766 yeah so what a year it's been for everybody so you were to we've been teasing your Matt Lucas party story non-stop it's not really a story is it it's just the fact that Joe was invited to Matt Lucas's kind of civil wedding ceremony party whatever you want to call it and it was star-packed Adam so man tell me all about it who was the biggest star there the biggest star there well let me list some stars and you tell me who's the biggest Jonathan Ross 40:10.746 --> 40:19.012 Will Young, Elton John, Dawn French, Richard Curtis, Rob Brydon, David Williams, Matt Lucas, Joe Cornish. 40:19.312 --> 40:20.873 Joe Cornish, who's he? 40:21.594 --> 40:22.895 Ah, who else was there? 40:22.915 --> 40:26.517 Edgar Wright, he's a big director. 40:26.597 --> 40:26.758 Yeah. 40:27.638 --> 40:28.779 I was hoping for a little Hollywood. 40:28.839 --> 40:29.479 Oh, Peter Kay? 40:29.920 --> 40:31.100 No, there's no Hollywood stars there. 40:31.521 --> 40:32.241 No Hollywood? 40:32.301 --> 40:34.162 No, I don't think Robbie Williams was even there. 40:34.663 --> 40:37.164 But it was hard to tell who was there because they were all so costumed. 40:37.384 --> 40:37.664 Right. 40:37.805 --> 40:41.067 It was a, it was a theme fancy dress panto party. 40:41.147 --> 40:41.287 Yeah. 40:41.427 --> 40:45.770 It was a beautiful room, the banqueting hall in Whitehall with the ceiling painted by a guy called Rubens. 40:46.390 --> 40:46.490 Oh. 40:46.690 --> 40:47.491 You might have heard of him. 40:47.511 --> 40:48.471 Paul Rubens. 40:48.671 --> 40:50.733 Yeah, he was on the first series of changing rooms. 40:50.993 --> 40:51.173 Yeah. 40:51.333 --> 40:52.114 One of the designers. 40:52.454 --> 40:54.055 Yeah, at the top of the room there were kind of 40:54.535 --> 41:04.618 crazy giant playing cards and a king and queen doing kind of weird performance art stuff in beautiful costumes, delicious food, people pouring champagne, all that kind of business. 41:04.799 --> 41:10.180 There was a gypsy caravan with a small boy and girl wearing lederhosen, playing a concertina and slapping their thighs. 41:10.520 --> 41:13.641 There was a man dressed as Michael Jackson in a kind of little Neverland area. 41:15.282 --> 41:15.963 Don't mention that. 41:15.983 --> 41:18.064 I don't think you're allowed to call them gypsies anymore. 41:18.705 --> 41:20.506 I say that in the kind of storybook sense. 41:20.526 --> 41:22.968 Blair's Britain, so... Welcome to Blair's Britain. 41:22.988 --> 41:24.249 Welcome to Blair's Britain. 41:24.570 --> 41:25.851 PC gone mad. 41:25.871 --> 41:27.372 That's what I call it. 41:27.912 --> 41:28.553 What else went on? 41:28.593 --> 41:31.015 There were lots of people dressed as... Sorry to interrupt. 41:31.035 --> 41:33.977 Wouldn't that be a funny character in a sketch show? 41:34.237 --> 41:35.038 PC gone mad. 41:35.578 --> 41:36.980 And he would be like a policeman. 41:37.180 --> 41:40.282 And he'd go around and go... 41:42.844 --> 41:44.605 And they go, oh, that's PC gone mad. 41:44.985 --> 41:52.148 It would be a funny sketch in an unfunny sketchbook. 41:52.168 --> 41:53.228 You're Nate. 41:53.548 --> 41:54.069 You're Nate. 41:54.209 --> 41:55.129 I'm Nate. 41:55.289 --> 41:55.969 We're all Nate. 41:57.270 --> 41:57.830 Oh, knockers. 41:57.890 --> 41:59.771 Oh, that's PC gone mad. 41:59.891 --> 42:02.612 That's kind of like a little cartoon in Private Eye, maybe, at best. 42:03.633 --> 42:04.113 So there you go. 42:04.153 --> 42:05.593 Is that an adequate description of the party? 42:06.314 --> 42:07.894 Man, that party sounds lovely. 42:07.914 --> 42:08.935 I wish I could have been there. 42:09.035 --> 42:10.976 And at one stage, Will Young sang a song. 42:12.000 --> 42:17.464 Yeah, and David Arnold, the composer of the Bond or the James Bond music, accompanied him on the piano. 42:17.724 --> 42:19.325 What did Will Young sing? 42:19.365 --> 42:20.866 Some kind of a song, I can't remember. 42:21.387 --> 42:23.488 But it was in a very sweet, high voice. 42:23.969 --> 42:28.872 And, you know, I know XFM listeners won't necessarily be Will Young fans. 42:28.892 --> 42:33.816 Because XFM listeners like raunchy people in top hats kicking over chairs and singing about drinking. 42:34.016 --> 42:34.456 Yeah, exactly. 42:34.496 --> 42:36.557 And Will Young tends to sing about snow and... 42:37.798 --> 42:40.781 cutting out shapes and making collages and stuff. 42:41.922 --> 42:47.607 But he's got a very sweet voice when he sings sweet, you know, when he's not doing his warbly Mariah Carey kind of business. 42:47.647 --> 42:52.371 I've got a piece of pink string and I'm making a man with it. 42:52.731 --> 42:55.974 It's better than that, for instance, his voice, yeah. 42:55.994 --> 42:57.815 His lyrics tend to be a bit better than that as well. 42:58.056 --> 42:58.376 No. 42:58.916 --> 43:00.758 Yes, but he's sung a song. 43:00.858 --> 43:02.099 I've got a piece of orange string 43:02.379 --> 43:03.119 And that was it. 43:03.500 --> 43:05.981 And you know what the most successful element of the party was? 43:06.501 --> 43:08.342 I don't think I said anything stupid to anybody. 43:08.362 --> 43:08.862 Oh, well done. 43:09.042 --> 43:10.742 I made no social faux pas. 43:10.943 --> 43:11.823 Didn't forget anyone's name? 43:12.103 --> 43:13.764 Didn't forget anyone's name, no. 43:14.144 --> 43:20.486 And when me and my girlfriend arrived at the party, a massive phalanx of paparazzi ran over to our taxi. 43:21.047 --> 43:22.027 About 20 of them. 43:22.647 --> 43:23.448 Cameras at the ready. 43:23.888 --> 43:24.888 Had a look through the window. 43:24.908 --> 43:26.569 20 faces fell. 43:27.526 --> 43:29.527 And they turned away and walked away. 43:34.068 --> 43:34.549 Walked off. 43:34.769 --> 43:35.889 Do you remember the Q Awards? 43:35.909 --> 43:38.730 We were hosting the Q Awards one year, listeners. 43:39.250 --> 43:41.651 And we turned up and exactly the same thing happened. 43:41.671 --> 43:42.391 But that's good. 43:42.872 --> 43:43.292 That's good. 43:43.312 --> 43:44.552 That's a good thing, Adam Buxton. 43:44.752 --> 43:44.952 Right. 43:45.272 --> 43:45.593 Yeah. 43:45.773 --> 43:46.053 Is it? 43:46.553 --> 43:47.993 I call them the craparazzi. 43:48.254 --> 43:48.594 Nice. 43:48.674 --> 43:49.014 Yeah. 43:49.534 --> 43:49.894 Slam. 43:49.974 --> 43:50.294 Bang. 43:50.354 --> 43:51.115 Take that, Paps. 43:51.155 --> 43:51.735 I call them that. 43:52.475 --> 44:00.348 the papa rubbish yeah bash this is anima joe london's xfm 104.9 here's the charlatans we've just looking 44:07.352 --> 44:09.973 That was the Charlotte Tongs with Jeff Yocking. 44:10.274 --> 44:14.316 This is Adam and Joe on XFM, London's 104.9, our Christmas Eve Eve special. 44:14.336 --> 44:21.960 We're into the X list, so text in your requests to 83936 or 83XFM, and we'll do our best to play them. 44:22.240 --> 44:24.741 How about some more predictions of 2007? 44:24.981 --> 44:25.762 OK, good idea. 44:26.042 --> 44:27.303 What are you most excited about? 44:27.363 --> 44:33.606 Like, movie-wise, I tell you what, listeners, I'm even in one of the movies I'm most excited to see. 44:33.766 --> 44:34.327 Oh my gosh. 44:34.347 --> 44:35.707 Which is Hot Fuzz, the follow-up 44:37.328 --> 45:06.091 movie to Shaun of the Dead yeah but we're a bit biased about that one it's not exactly an objective choice but you know what the funny thing is it is an objective choice well it is that's the thing yeah we yeah it's actually gonna be really really good and I haven't seen any of it yet and I'm really really excited to see it it's a good one it's of course the follow-up to Shaun of the Dead if you're a fan of that or spaced or you know Nick Frost and Simon Pegg's work then you should be excited about Hot Fuzz brilliant posters going up around the cinemas in London are they kind of bad boys 2 style went out a bit of a brick twist 45:06.392 --> 45:09.230 I think it's out in February or March. 45:10.356 --> 45:11.236 Man, can't wait for that. 45:11.256 --> 45:11.816 Exciting stuff. 45:11.896 --> 45:12.697 Trailers on the internet. 45:13.037 --> 45:13.437 Looking good. 45:13.457 --> 45:15.498 There's a little bit of Buxton in the trailer. 45:15.978 --> 45:17.418 Just my feet, I think, aren't they? 45:17.438 --> 45:18.559 Yeah, the very end of your death. 45:18.799 --> 45:19.999 Yeah, because I get killed in it. 45:20.139 --> 45:23.720 Buxton gets killed in a spectacular fashion in that film, so watch out for that. 45:23.740 --> 45:24.280 Factacular. 45:24.300 --> 45:25.901 Celebrity Big Brother coming up very shortly. 45:26.001 --> 45:27.361 We don't know who's on it, though, yet. 45:27.421 --> 45:30.782 No, but you know, I'm going to avoid it this year. 45:30.802 --> 45:31.543 I like it, I like it. 45:31.563 --> 45:32.363 I'm going to stay away from it. 45:32.403 --> 45:37.624 You can't have two classic ones in a row, though, and last year was a classic, so this year's probably going to be a bit of a sink show. 45:38.325 --> 45:39.325 What other predictions have you got? 45:39.505 --> 45:40.165 Harry Potter. 45:40.205 --> 45:40.785 That's not a prediction. 45:40.805 --> 45:41.445 That's just a fact. 45:41.505 --> 45:42.406 That's coming out, isn't it? 45:42.586 --> 45:43.026 That's right. 45:43.046 --> 45:43.866 What's it called this time? 45:44.826 --> 45:45.726 And the packet of crisps. 45:45.966 --> 45:46.627 Harry Potter. 45:46.787 --> 45:48.327 And my mum's boring. 45:48.507 --> 45:49.827 And the hardcore rap album. 45:51.248 --> 45:51.428 Right. 45:51.668 --> 45:52.168 I don't know. 45:52.188 --> 45:54.588 Harry Potter and the side order of fries. 46:03.991 --> 46:09.934 Live shows though speaking of which you know what every comic is doing like a live show nowadays. 46:09.974 --> 46:11.875 What do you mean like a stand-up show like a tour? 46:12.175 --> 46:16.297 A tour sort of thing where they just transplant the shows that they've done. 46:16.538 --> 46:16.998 Transplant? 46:17.018 --> 46:19.179 Why are you talking like that all of a sudden? 46:19.259 --> 46:20.400 Well how do you say transplant? 46:20.580 --> 46:20.800 Yes. 46:21.832 --> 46:48.631 sorry transplant the show that says Colonel Cornish the show that they've done on TV onto the stage now this is a veiled reference to Mitchell and Webb well you know of course Little Britain did the tour this year it's turning into a giant tour-a-thon they're going to Australia next year they're gonna be touring for the rest of their lives the mighty Boosh of course did a fantastic live show that was one of my live events of the year yeah I think my top live show of the year would be the Boosh in fact last year was kind of the year of the Boosh 46:49.164 --> 46:51.665 It was the year of the Bush, but yet they were ignored at the Comedy Awards. 46:51.685 --> 46:52.425 Because they're so good. 46:53.105 --> 46:53.785 That's what I'm saying. 46:53.845 --> 46:58.087 I think things that are genuinely good tend to kind of reach a certain level and stay there. 46:58.307 --> 46:58.527 Right. 46:58.967 --> 47:02.408 And of course, Mitchell and Webb had their tour, which was very successful. 47:02.528 --> 47:02.688 Yeah. 47:02.728 --> 47:04.649 We, neither of us have seen that, so we can't pass comment. 47:04.969 --> 47:07.049 No, but I hear it was a delight. 47:07.209 --> 47:07.350 Yeah. 47:07.390 --> 47:08.710 And we did originate some of the sketches. 47:08.870 --> 47:10.270 So yes, that's right. 47:10.290 --> 47:10.550 Yeah. 47:10.651 --> 47:11.611 Number one. 47:11.711 --> 47:12.111 Hello. 47:13.391 --> 47:15.372 Next year, who's going to be touring? 47:15.752 --> 47:17.113 They could do a live Green Wing show. 47:17.133 --> 47:18.254 They should do a live Green Wing. 47:18.434 --> 47:19.875 They're too busy with Barclaycard adverts. 47:20.055 --> 47:20.335 Yeah. 47:21.056 --> 47:22.537 Maybe we should tour in the new year. 47:22.777 --> 47:23.778 Adam and Joe go on the road. 47:23.978 --> 47:24.538 That's a good idea. 47:24.558 --> 47:26.119 Wouldn't you think we could make some new stuff? 47:26.379 --> 47:27.080 Yeah. 47:27.100 --> 47:27.940 Perform some songs. 47:28.521 --> 47:29.041 Do some chitchat. 47:29.061 --> 47:29.882 Do you think anybody would come? 47:30.282 --> 47:30.602 No. 47:30.922 --> 47:31.723 Well, let's do it anyway. 47:31.783 --> 47:32.624 Yeah. 47:32.644 --> 47:33.304 Here's some music now. 47:33.344 --> 47:33.844 This is Beck. 47:34.145 --> 47:34.625 What's this called? 47:35.165 --> 47:36.787 This is called Cellphone's Dead. 47:37.007 --> 47:38.648 This is his Herbie Hancock track. 47:43.268 --> 47:44.409 That was Open The Go with Get Over It. 47:44.450 --> 47:46.612 This is Adam and Jo on XFM London's 104.9. 47:47.213 --> 47:52.679 Of course, OK Go had a special sort of smash hit video this year that was disseminated over YouTube. 47:53.340 --> 47:53.740 YouTube? 47:53.760 --> 47:54.381 What's YouTube? 47:54.581 --> 47:57.365 Well, Adam, YouTube is a new cultural phenomenon. 47:57.425 --> 47:58.947 It's like internet television. 47:59.067 --> 48:00.809 I love new cultural phenomenon. 48:01.169 --> 48:03.871 Yeah, it's user-generated content UGC. 48:04.171 --> 48:04.371 Huh? 48:04.571 --> 48:04.851 Yeah. 48:05.152 --> 48:05.832 Is that a cinema chain? 48:05.852 --> 48:06.893 Is that a cinema chain? 48:06.953 --> 48:07.033 No. 48:07.253 --> 48:07.633 Nice. 48:07.713 --> 48:07.993 Yeah. 48:08.013 --> 48:08.093 What? 48:08.173 --> 48:10.435 United Gomont Cinemas. 48:11.395 --> 48:14.858 Yeah, user-generated content is the future. 48:14.938 --> 48:15.338 One brain. 48:17.159 --> 48:20.383 Yeah, cause the world's gone YouTube crazy and I tell you how you can tell that. 48:20.543 --> 48:20.743 Why? 48:21.063 --> 48:25.088 Because you know all those rubbish cable channels where you used to have ladies rubbing their bits? 48:25.849 --> 48:29.352 Now that's been taken over by user-generated content. 48:29.853 --> 48:30.253 Right. 48:30.334 --> 48:35.239 Now you get channels with like six little screens and people sending videos of their bums. 48:35.519 --> 48:37.140 Even the news are like paying people. 48:37.160 --> 48:39.901 They pay people a hundred pounds to send in their clips. 48:39.941 --> 48:41.282 That's a bit of a rip-off, don't you think? 48:41.302 --> 48:42.403 Is that what the news pays? 48:42.463 --> 48:43.583 On channel five, yeah. 48:43.723 --> 48:44.644 Send us your clips. 48:44.844 --> 48:45.164 Really? 48:45.524 --> 48:49.026 And that's... whatever happened to reporting or anything like that? 48:49.726 --> 48:49.887 Clips. 48:49.907 --> 48:50.047 Yeah? 48:50.067 --> 48:51.347 Just getting clips in. 48:51.968 --> 48:53.268 It's extraordinary stuff, you know? 48:53.288 --> 48:58.971 Here's some more music. 48:59.451 --> 49:01.573 This is the psychedelic furs with Pretty in Pink. 49:01.973 --> 49:02.833 Oh, I love that film. 49:02.973 --> 49:03.874 This is a great song. 49:03.974 --> 49:04.174 Yeah. 49:12.264 --> 49:22.091 That was the Guillemots with Trains to Brazil this is Adam and Joe on XFM London's 104.9 our very special Christmas show and to be honest listeners I'm still a bit tutti from my Christmas drinks. 49:22.611 --> 49:28.515 Oh man the only problem I have right now apart from the fact that I slightly dread New Year's Eve and the whole over excitement aspect. 49:28.555 --> 49:30.137 And you haven't been invited to the big magic party. 49:30.197 --> 49:34.440 Also I haven't been invited to any parties is the aftermath the week 49:35.380 --> 49:44.505 the first week of January where all the festivity drains away and is replaced by endless adverts for fitness videos. 49:44.665 --> 49:46.946 But you see that's when they slip in Celebrity Big Brother. 49:46.966 --> 49:49.287 That's the genius of Celebrity Big Brother. 49:49.687 --> 49:50.387 You've no choice. 49:50.788 --> 49:54.349 It's like a tiny thimble of putrid water in a desert. 49:54.789 --> 49:55.630 You have to drink it. 49:57.047 --> 50:13.063 Cuz it's like really hypocritical yeah don't you think cuz like right before Christmas they're all saying oh yum mmm unless strawberries have some of them with chocolate sauce and then immediately after Christmas it's like no don't have no more strawberries buy a fitness video cuz you're too fat cuz you've had too many bits of chocolate. 50:13.083 --> 50:15.245 It's almost as if all they care about is selling you stuff. 50:15.345 --> 50:15.565 Yeah. 50:16.566 --> 50:21.151 Hey you know this year according to Trevor McDonald is gonna be the worst year ever for the high street. 50:22.603 --> 50:26.568 Because everyone's going off to New York or buying stuff on the internet. 50:26.708 --> 50:28.871 Are people seriously going to New York? 50:28.911 --> 50:36.501 They did a thing Trevor McDonald did on the telly, he didn't but he got someone to do it, where a couple went to New York and did all their Christmas shopping. 50:36.882 --> 50:39.024 They bought some jeans and Superman returns. 50:39.565 --> 50:43.267 And they came back and tottered it all up against a couple who'd done their shopping in London. 50:43.607 --> 50:47.689 Even with the price of the airfares, the couple who'd gone to America were a grand ahead of the game. 50:47.829 --> 50:49.309 Well, that is a disgrace. 50:49.850 --> 50:51.891 Were they worried about their carbon footprint, you might ask? 50:51.931 --> 50:52.051 Yeah. 50:52.251 --> 50:53.471 Were they worried about the pollution? 50:53.511 --> 50:56.553 Because taking a flight to America is the equivalent of running a house for six months. 50:56.973 --> 50:57.253 Exactly. 50:57.293 --> 50:58.173 Same carbon emissions. 50:58.454 --> 50:59.054 Were they worried? 50:59.294 --> 50:59.874 No, they weren't. 50:59.934 --> 51:01.395 They went, no, not really. 51:02.386 --> 51:03.147 That's shocking, man. 51:03.207 --> 51:03.807 Shocking, isn't it? 51:03.847 --> 51:04.928 But there you go, that's the future. 51:05.288 --> 51:06.129 The death of the high street. 51:06.329 --> 51:08.530 By this time next year, there might not be any shops. 51:09.011 --> 51:09.771 Death of the high street. 51:10.032 --> 51:12.673 Death of the planet's what I'm a little bit more worried about! 51:12.814 --> 51:21.140 Mind you, they had a bloke who ran John Lewis or something, and he said, actually, we've got more people through our doors than ever because they like to pick up the merchandise. 51:21.340 --> 51:23.741 And then he picked up a piece of fresh sponge cake and ate it. 51:23.761 --> 51:25.182 Mmm, that was delicious. 51:27.104 --> 51:28.505 And the reporter had some as well. 51:28.525 --> 51:30.146 He went, mmm, it is delicious. 51:30.366 --> 51:31.467 This is real, isn't it? 51:33.086 --> 51:34.269 And then it went back to Trevor McDonald. 51:34.289 --> 51:37.717 This isn't just a picture on a computer screen, I can actually taste it. 51:37.877 --> 51:38.218 Brilliant. 51:38.438 --> 51:38.979 Brilliant stuff. 51:39.918 --> 51:43.321 So there you go, that's high street and consumer news coming to you from me. 51:43.601 --> 51:46.203 That was pretty political stuff, though, that we were just... About the cake? 51:46.643 --> 51:48.244 Yeah, about the whole thing like that. 51:48.364 --> 51:54.689 You know, we were getting into some political... Some people think that we're just a couple of morons talking about things that don't matter. 51:54.949 --> 51:55.249 Really? 51:55.289 --> 51:55.870 Well, they're wrong. 51:56.070 --> 51:57.531 They're dead wrong. 51:57.631 --> 51:58.732 We are political. 51:58.792 --> 52:00.093 We are quite political. 52:00.433 --> 52:01.734 OK, now it's time for some more music. 52:01.914 --> 52:03.495 This is David Bowie with Golden News. 52:12.037 --> 52:14.539 REM with it's the end of the world as we know it. 52:14.619 --> 52:15.320 Hopefully it isn't. 52:16.241 --> 52:18.382 Well, exactly, but the signs aren't good, are they? 52:18.622 --> 52:18.823 No. 52:18.843 --> 52:21.885 You gotta stop using electricity, listeners. 52:22.426 --> 52:22.686 Yeah? 52:23.226 --> 52:29.431 Yeah, well, in practical terms, apart from doing all your recycling and stuff like that, what's the average person supposed to do? 52:29.451 --> 52:30.612 Turn the lights off. 52:30.792 --> 52:31.733 I feel so helpless. 52:31.753 --> 52:32.774 You know what I've done this year? 52:32.834 --> 52:33.034 What? 52:33.174 --> 52:33.855 No Christmas tree. 52:34.375 --> 52:35.016 None Christmas tree? 52:35.036 --> 52:35.576 No, no Christmas tree. 52:35.596 --> 52:36.797 Why, what's wrong with a Christmas tree? 52:37.278 --> 52:39.420 Well, tree, like, waste a tree. 52:40.492 --> 52:41.334 You don't want to waste a tree. 52:41.374 --> 52:43.578 Imagine all those trees being chopped down and wasted. 52:43.598 --> 52:43.958 It's gotta be bad. 52:43.978 --> 52:45.421 Yeah, but there's more growing, aren't there? 52:45.441 --> 52:46.784 They're planting more Christmas trees. 52:46.804 --> 52:47.745 Nah, Christmas tree's evil. 52:47.866 --> 52:50.170 That's a good carbon neutral business there, growing Christmas trees. 52:50.190 --> 52:51.232 Do you know what I've given as presents? 52:51.572 --> 52:51.793 What? 52:51.933 --> 52:52.775 Just mud and paste. 52:55.305 --> 53:15.733 of paste and if anyone complains then they're guilty of ruining the planet right yeah do you know what i'm having for food haven't even shaped the mud and paste into any kind of just a ball yeah do you know what i'm having for food what mud and paste and grass on the top yeah and if you complain then have a slice of al gore pie 53:16.073 --> 53:17.193 No champagne or anything? 53:18.194 --> 53:23.395 Champagne, the bubbles are full of gases, global greenhouse gases, that's how they make it fizzy. 53:24.376 --> 53:30.518 They permeate it with greenhouse gases, that's the word isn't it? 53:30.538 --> 53:34.399 Oh dear, I do care about this kind of thing, it sounds as if I'm taking the mick out of it, but no. 53:34.659 --> 53:38.481 But I tell you what, that REM song, do you think that encourages people to be irresponsible? 53:38.841 --> 53:45.324 I mean, in this day and age, when the world in fact may be in terrible trouble from global warming, they're just being complacent. 53:45.344 --> 53:46.065 We feel fine. 53:46.425 --> 53:47.065 The world's ending. 53:47.305 --> 53:48.526 I'm not going to do anything about it. 53:48.626 --> 53:51.727 I'm going to take my shirt off and play with my skateboard in a derelict building. 53:51.747 --> 53:53.028 They're being, they're being ironical about it. 53:53.048 --> 53:56.970 They're saying that's what you're doing, you idiots. 53:57.350 --> 53:57.630 Are they? 53:57.831 --> 53:58.051 Yeah. 53:58.151 --> 54:00.673 They're saying, you're just carrying on as if there's nothing wrong. 54:00.833 --> 54:01.534 It's the end of the world. 54:01.574 --> 54:04.496 It's staring you right in the face and you're not changing your lifestyles. 54:04.656 --> 54:05.137 One iota. 54:05.157 --> 54:17.126 You're just going to New York to buy your cheap wheeze and your copies of Batman Returns and your cheap jeans and then you're coming back on your 20 pound flight and you're killing the planet just because you want to go on a cheap wheeze. 54:17.166 --> 54:18.768 Can I get to New York for 20 pounds? 54:20.009 --> 54:20.289 Probably. 54:20.309 --> 54:22.030 How much does Batman Begins returns? 54:22.771 --> 54:24.652 Yeah, that's the theme. 54:25.132 --> 54:26.993 Batman returns. 54:27.053 --> 54:27.953 Superman returns. 54:27.973 --> 54:29.053 Is there not a Batman Begins? 54:29.413 --> 54:30.374 Batman returns. 54:30.714 --> 54:31.734 Batman goes out. 54:32.394 --> 54:33.455 Superman returns. 54:33.895 --> 54:34.755 Batman pops in. 54:34.775 --> 54:37.096 Yeah, well the house is only big enough for one of them. 54:37.116 --> 54:38.517 They live in the same house. 54:39.597 --> 54:43.339 Batman pops out, Batman returns, Superman pops out. 54:43.859 --> 54:45.000 Wow, it's exciting. 54:45.580 --> 54:46.741 All these superheroes. 54:46.901 --> 54:48.922 Spider-Man swings by. 54:48.962 --> 54:50.443 Spider-Man back in ten minutes. 54:52.904 --> 54:53.905 Spider-Man. 54:53.925 --> 54:56.566 Superman, only two school children allowed at one time. 54:56.586 --> 54:57.667 Spider-Man returns. 54:58.187 --> 54:59.688 Spider-Man pops back out. 55:00.649 --> 55:02.970 Spider-Man goes on holiday. 55:04.151 --> 55:05.992 That should be the name of the new Spider-Man film. 55:06.572 --> 55:08.093 Spider-Man goes on holiday. 55:08.686 --> 55:11.008 And it should have cameos from Dawn French in it. 55:11.848 --> 55:14.090 This is Adam and Joe, XFM, London's 104.9. 55:14.690 --> 55:16.591 It's time for some even more music. 55:17.192 --> 55:18.412 It's time for even more music. 55:18.432 --> 55:19.553 That's my favourite kind of music. 55:20.954 --> 55:21.695 We're very tired. 55:21.715 --> 55:23.976 I'm slightly drunk. 55:24.056 --> 55:25.777 Excuse me, have you got any even more music? 55:26.198 --> 55:28.139 This is Franz Ferdinand with Darts of Pleasure. 55:28.479 --> 55:29.620 What do they mean by that? 55:36.813 --> 55:38.755 This is Adam and Joe, XFM London's 1 on 4.9. 55:38.935 --> 55:41.797 We're coming towards the close of our amazing three-hour festive marathon. 55:41.817 --> 55:43.759 Yeah, I don't know about you, but I'm drunk out of my mind. 55:44.139 --> 55:47.562 We've both had one too many liqueurs, and we're feeling a little bit tooty. 55:47.822 --> 55:50.064 But hey, it's New Year's Saturday. 55:50.284 --> 55:51.065 Is that what it's called? 55:51.085 --> 55:52.146 New Year's Eve Eve. 55:52.506 --> 55:54.368 New Year's Eve Eve, and anything goes. 55:55.268 --> 55:55.909 Anything goes? 55:55.929 --> 55:57.270 Yeah, all laws are suspended. 55:57.830 --> 55:58.791 It's anarchy in the streets. 55:58.831 --> 55:59.672 Laws of gravity. 55:59.972 --> 56:01.473 Yeah, everyone's floating around. 56:02.474 --> 56:04.196 Trains are flying to space. 56:04.756 --> 56:07.602 It's sort of a depressing time, because are the sales, have they started already? 56:07.762 --> 56:10.147 Their sales started well before Christmas. 56:10.488 --> 56:12.893 Adam, didn't I talk to you about the death of the high street? 56:12.913 --> 56:14.035 Yeah, that's true. 56:15.942 --> 56:16.202 Yeah. 56:16.562 --> 56:20.424 So listen, all we've got to say to you listeners is have a fantastic new year. 56:21.324 --> 56:26.326 Don't forget to check out our podcasts available on iTunes or xfm.co.uk. 56:26.506 --> 56:34.929 It's not as if we've got a new one, but we've got a fantastic seasonal best of, and if you haven't heard them, 20 Laugh Riots available to download. 56:35.069 --> 56:35.589 Absolutely. 56:35.869 --> 56:37.670 Each one has got something good to recommend it. 56:38.091 --> 56:40.432 And the best of is non-stop good times. 56:40.512 --> 56:41.912 We heartily recommend that one. 56:42.032 --> 56:43.613 It's the finest thing we've done in years. 56:44.033 --> 56:45.794 We should say thank you to our producer, Xanthi. 56:45.934 --> 56:46.635 Xanthi, thank you. 56:46.855 --> 56:49.556 Xanthi Fuller, our excellent producer here at XFM. 56:49.596 --> 56:50.377 Thank you, Xanthi, so much. 56:50.397 --> 56:51.117 She's tip for the top. 56:52.276 --> 56:52.697 Apparently. 56:52.937 --> 56:54.579 Oh yeah, no she's just a young person. 56:54.619 --> 56:56.522 It says here Xanthi Fuller is tip for the top. 56:58.084 --> 57:01.448 You can find out more about her on www.XanthiFuller.com. 57:01.589 --> 57:05.714 If you go to any one of her tips you'll find that they are extremely hot. 57:06.415 --> 57:07.096 She's hotly dipped. 57:07.776 --> 57:12.358 Also, Matt Everett, thank you very much, Deed, for helping us out with our podcast. 57:12.378 --> 57:14.978 But most of all, listeners, thank you for listening to our show. 57:15.218 --> 57:16.539 Have a fantastic Saturday. 57:17.639 --> 57:29.583 Don't forget to buy lots of booze and stuff, Bacardi Breezers, so that when you go to the park on New Year's Eve, hop over the fence, you know, you can protect yourself from the cold by being well sozzled. 57:31.043 --> 57:44.468 talking to the kids that's what the kids do granddad right they don't have anywhere to go they all you always end up in the park when you're a kid don't you with a couple of Bacardi breezes and ten silk cut and people you hardly know I read in the paper 57:46.189 --> 57:55.821 Well, some of the local council has installed orange lighting in all their parks because it makes teenagers' spotty skin look even more severely bad. 57:56.441 --> 57:58.164 We'll see you next year, thanks a lot for listening. 57:58.204 --> 58:00.326 This has been Hanuman Joe, goodbye. 58:00.346 --> 58:02.028 Bye, love you, bye!