WEBVTT 00:08.280 --> 00:10.562 Don't get that many fades anymore, do you? 00:10.802 --> 00:13.643 I think it's gonna be easy for her to ride on a white horse. 00:13.824 --> 00:14.064 Why? 00:14.424 --> 00:20.368 Well, she can just go to a riding school or one of those parks where they have pony rides in the morning. 00:20.848 --> 00:21.048 Right. 00:21.128 --> 00:21.889 Ride on the horse. 00:22.950 --> 00:23.770 Withdrawal of the single. 00:24.511 --> 00:25.191 Bish, bash, bosh. 00:25.831 --> 00:26.552 Everybody's happy. 00:26.692 --> 00:27.452 Everybody's happy. 00:27.912 --> 00:28.913 Hello, this is Adam and Joe. 00:29.053 --> 00:30.073 This is XFM. 00:30.414 --> 00:34.816 London's 104.9, but also, uh, hearable across the country. 00:35.516 --> 00:36.036 Absolutely. 00:36.276 --> 00:37.957 We've got a great show coming up for you this afternoon. 00:38.177 --> 00:40.058 We've got fantastic prizes. 00:40.699 --> 00:42.379 What prizes have we got, Xanthe? 00:42.660 --> 00:43.540 Fist of Fury. 00:43.780 --> 00:44.681 Fist of Fury. 00:44.701 --> 00:45.121 What is that? 00:45.181 --> 00:47.022 That's an insane martial arts thing. 00:47.342 --> 00:47.522 Yeah. 00:48.032 --> 00:48.232 Right. 00:48.612 --> 00:49.612 Fist of Fury DVDs. 00:49.792 --> 00:51.433 For Ditchies in the Dark, right? 00:51.653 --> 00:54.634 One of those for everybody who calls in. 00:54.654 --> 00:54.714 Wow. 00:54.914 --> 00:55.354 That's good. 00:55.374 --> 00:59.095 That's a good prize, because people love DV... everybody loves DVDs. 00:59.275 --> 01:00.635 We've got Tickets to See the Darkness. 01:01.516 --> 01:02.916 We've got Adam and Joe DVDs. 01:03.616 --> 01:07.437 I'm going to be later playing you some highlights from American Idol. 01:08.237 --> 01:10.718 I'm also going to be investigating the mystery of Paul Kahana. 01:11.963 --> 01:12.844 What's Paul Kahane? 01:13.064 --> 01:14.485 Well, it's a mystery, isn't it? 01:14.505 --> 01:14.945 That is a mystery. 01:14.966 --> 01:17.067 And I'm going to be investigating Paul Kahane later. 01:17.367 --> 01:20.510 I'm going to be investigating the mystery of P-Pulala. 01:20.530 --> 01:21.091 Ooh. 01:21.591 --> 01:25.774 I just made that up, but I've got no, you know, I think maybe you- are you making yours up too? 01:25.794 --> 01:26.655 Paul-Paul Kahane? 01:26.815 --> 01:28.977 No, he's on the TV all the time, Paul Kahane. 01:29.077 --> 01:29.738 Paul Kahane. 01:29.778 --> 01:31.419 Yeah, I'll be telling you more about him later. 01:31.439 --> 01:31.939 Okay. 01:32.080 --> 01:37.704 And, uh, also we've got Crap Commentary Corner coming up in the next 15 minutes or so. 01:37.884 --> 01:39.866 Would you say it's a difficult one or an easy one this 01:39.966 --> 01:42.006 I'd say they're very funny enjoyable clips. 01:42.247 --> 01:45.167 Yeah people making right idiots of themselves. 01:45.267 --> 01:46.827 Yes, but it's pretty easy. 01:47.168 --> 01:47.708 Okay good. 01:47.988 --> 01:48.508 That's nice. 01:48.988 --> 01:50.368 I've got a text competition as well. 01:50.748 --> 01:52.069 Oh brilliant for later on. 01:52.269 --> 01:53.609 I'll tell you all about that later. 01:54.269 --> 01:55.569 And there's Alex Zane. 01:55.909 --> 02:02.631 He's probably going to hang around, you know, for the 19th sexiest man in the world, which he was voted apparently in New Woman magazine. 02:03.331 --> 02:09.896 he certainly spends a lot of time hanging around like a nerd in the offices of XFM playing video games on a Saturday afternoon. 02:09.916 --> 02:10.617 What should he be doing? 02:10.937 --> 02:13.559 Well, he should be out, like, you know- Just with girls caressing him. 02:13.599 --> 02:16.541 Yeah, letting girls lick his face and stuff like that. 02:16.721 --> 02:19.663 That's what the 19th sexiest man- he's right next to Pete Doherty. 02:19.704 --> 02:21.425 Pete Doherty's the 18th sexiest man. 02:21.885 --> 02:23.166 Brad Pitt's the sexiest man. 02:23.206 --> 02:23.526 Really? 02:23.687 --> 02:23.927 Yeah. 02:24.067 --> 02:24.887 I'm gonna have to look at that list. 02:24.907 --> 02:26.989 But he beat Heath Ledger, for goodness sake. 02:27.109 --> 02:28.971 Well, Heath Ledger's a man's man now. 02:29.751 --> 02:43.827 that's true ever since he went up the mountain he's quite literally blown it uh hey just before we play some music i've got a little uh request to xfm listeners people who listen to the station all day every day we were supposed to be sent some playstation 2 video games to give away today 02:44.948 --> 02:59.951 We love Katamari the ones we were talking about last week But they either haven't arrived or another DJ has stolen them or given them away So if you've been listening to the station and heard a DJ giveaway PlayStation 2 games text us and call us cuz I'm gonna beat them to a pulp. 03:00.171 --> 03:04.292 Okay, here's some music It would be great if we could play pulp at that point, wouldn't it? 03:04.412 --> 03:05.013 That's not good. 03:05.113 --> 03:05.413 It's hard fi 03:20.250 --> 03:21.091 I was muttering. 03:21.472 --> 03:22.393 What were you muttering about? 03:22.674 --> 03:24.055 Oh, just personal stuff. 03:24.236 --> 03:24.716 Personal issues. 03:24.736 --> 03:25.077 My piles. 03:25.397 --> 03:26.319 Your piles? 03:26.339 --> 03:28.382 Don't say piles in the first 15 minutes. 03:28.422 --> 03:29.583 Hello, this is Adam and Joe. 03:29.664 --> 03:30.304 You're listening to XFM. 03:30.324 --> 03:31.066 That was hard fire, incidentally. 03:31.086 --> 03:31.266 Yeah. 03:31.366 --> 03:32.067 With hard to beat. 03:32.127 --> 03:33.870 Sorry, Joe, to interrupt your... It's all right. 03:33.890 --> 03:34.390 It was nonsense. 03:34.510 --> 03:35.011 ...ID there. 03:35.932 --> 03:40.298 Um, so listen, Joe Cornish, any strong feelings about Golden Wonder going bust? 03:40.678 --> 03:43.001 Well, it's depressing, isn't it, and I feel angry with Lineker. 03:43.402 --> 03:44.623 Yeah, do you blame Lineker? 03:44.643 --> 03:45.604 I blame Lineker, yeah. 03:46.085 --> 03:46.966 Why, for being too good? 03:46.986 --> 03:48.148 The power of his personality. 03:48.228 --> 03:49.489 The genius of his ears. 03:49.509 --> 03:50.451 His crisp-shaped ears. 03:50.731 --> 03:51.091 Yeah. 03:51.332 --> 03:52.513 Giant, crisp-shaped ears. 03:52.834 --> 03:53.134 Wow. 03:53.334 --> 03:55.756 So you think it's all down to the genius of Lineker? 03:56.096 --> 03:56.656 I think so. 03:56.696 --> 03:57.477 It's a bit of a shame. 03:57.837 --> 04:03.681 I think it's a real shame, man, because Lineker's effectively stymied the world of knick-knacks, you know? 04:03.701 --> 04:04.301 There's no more knick-knacks. 04:04.341 --> 04:05.702 Are there no more knick-knacks? 04:05.902 --> 04:06.923 That's a Golden Wonder snack. 04:06.943 --> 04:08.484 What are students going to do without knick-knacks? 04:08.964 --> 04:11.086 Nice and spicy flavour, ribbon saucy? 04:11.126 --> 04:11.406 No. 04:11.786 --> 04:12.447 They're all going. 04:12.467 --> 04:13.047 They're all going. 04:13.127 --> 04:14.288 Ribbon saucy? 04:14.348 --> 04:15.129 Ribbon saucy. 04:15.149 --> 04:16.730 Why do you make a sauce out of ribbons? 04:18.331 --> 04:19.271 Scampi and lemon. 04:19.291 --> 04:20.472 That's going. 04:20.492 --> 04:21.773 I won't be sad to see the back of them. 04:21.793 --> 04:23.234 Do you remember the I-love-knick-knacks? 04:23.854 --> 04:24.875 Nick Nacks are delicious. 04:24.935 --> 04:29.217 What are they shaped like though, Nick Nacks? 04:29.597 --> 04:31.417 What are they based on though? 04:31.878 --> 04:35.059 They're like a mutated chicken leg, a miniature mutated chicken leg. 04:35.239 --> 04:35.839 Yeah, exactly. 04:35.859 --> 04:36.980 How did they come up with that design? 04:37.340 --> 04:39.981 Well, do you remember the TV ad that was like Alien? 04:40.241 --> 04:41.582 It was a very strange advert. 04:42.122 --> 04:53.769 And there was people, some youths sat around on a sort of cruise liner and they were talking about how, and it was like it was a recreation of the scene from Alien just before the alien bursts out of Kane's stomach, you know. 04:53.789 --> 04:57.851 So they're all sat around, very well cast group of teens to look like the crew of the Nostromo. 04:58.531 --> 05:00.332 And this guy suddenly starts freaking out. 05:00.592 --> 05:00.993 Nostromo? 05:01.633 --> 05:02.194 Nostromo? 05:02.374 --> 05:03.174 Nostromo, yeah. 05:03.715 --> 05:04.315 Come on! 05:04.335 --> 05:05.136 Let's go on. 05:05.196 --> 05:05.717 Keep talking. 05:06.537 --> 05:10.241 I'd like someone who knows how that's pronounced to phone in and, uh, adjudicate. 05:10.421 --> 05:10.961 Space man. 05:11.081 --> 05:11.602 Space man. 05:12.382 --> 05:17.007 Um, anyway, so yeah, a knick-knack basically bursts out of this guy's stomach. 05:17.407 --> 05:17.487 Ah. 05:17.587 --> 05:18.948 And it looks like- Has he got a face? 05:19.269 --> 05:21.430 No, no, no, it's brilliant, it's just a knick-knack. 05:21.490 --> 05:23.792 And it looks very much like the little alien that burst out. 05:24.053 --> 05:26.615 It's quite a grotesque advert and I'm pretty sure they don't run it anymore. 05:26.755 --> 05:28.596 So Lineker's murdered knickknacks? 05:28.716 --> 05:32.758 He murdered knickknacks, he's murdered ringos, he's murdered wheat crunchies. 05:32.978 --> 05:33.838 Oh, they're delicious. 05:33.858 --> 05:34.378 They are delicious. 05:34.398 --> 05:36.399 Because they've got bacon-flavored air inside them. 05:36.419 --> 05:36.880 Exactly. 05:37.640 --> 05:38.260 Which stays with you. 05:38.280 --> 05:39.581 No other crisp flavors the air. 05:39.841 --> 05:40.041 No. 05:40.501 --> 05:41.362 Within the snack. 05:41.522 --> 05:46.684 You know, because I rate a crispy snack by how long it stays in your burp system. 05:46.724 --> 05:48.025 In the burp system, it's true. 05:48.265 --> 05:53.087 And I believe the wheat crunchy will stay in your burp system for about two days. 05:53.127 --> 05:55.348 If you were tested by the cops with a burpalyzer, 05:56.108 --> 05:59.572 You would still show up with a wheat crunchy a week later. 05:59.772 --> 06:05.919 Plus, if you choke on a wheat crunchy, its tubular shape allows you to breathe while the ambulance gets there. 06:05.960 --> 06:08.042 It can be used for a makeshift tracheotomy. 06:08.262 --> 06:14.049 If someone else chokes on a different snack, a wheat crunchy can be used for an anaconda-style instant tracheotomy. 06:16.893 --> 06:18.515 That was in Anaconda, wasn't it? 06:18.575 --> 06:18.896 Was it? 06:18.996 --> 06:19.937 Yeah, that was revolting. 06:19.977 --> 06:21.899 I love those biro tracheotomies. 06:21.919 --> 06:24.042 The sudden tracheotomies that make a movie. 06:24.162 --> 06:25.323 There's another one in Red Eye. 06:25.664 --> 06:25.944 Is there? 06:26.064 --> 06:26.284 Yeah. 06:26.324 --> 06:26.985 Have you seen Red Eye? 06:27.005 --> 06:27.246 Yeah. 06:27.486 --> 06:28.147 I don't remember that though. 06:28.723 --> 06:32.165 she stabs a- a biro right into, um, what's his name? 06:32.185 --> 06:33.125 The wind- Ricky and Steve- Cillian Murphy. 06:33.145 --> 06:33.645 Steve- Cillian Murphy. 06:33.665 --> 06:34.286 Ricky and Steve- Yeah. 06:34.506 --> 06:35.146 Ricky and Steve- And, uh, yeah. 06:35.166 --> 06:36.147 Ricky and Steve- Cillian, Cillian. 06:36.167 --> 06:36.687 Ricky and Steve- Cillian. 06:36.707 --> 06:37.167 Steve- Nostromo. 06:37.187 --> 06:37.867 Ricky and Steve- Nostromo. 06:37.887 --> 06:38.508 Ricky and Steve- Nostromo. 06:38.528 --> 06:41.449 Ricky and Steve- I may not be right about Nostromo, but I'm right about Cillian. 06:41.629 --> 06:42.390 Steve and Steve- Cillian. 06:42.410 --> 06:43.450 Ricky and Steve- Yeah. 06:43.470 --> 06:45.631 Uh, which is quite good because he always plays quite creepy people. 06:45.651 --> 06:46.031 Steve and Steve- Mm. 06:46.051 --> 06:46.091 Mm. 06:46.111 --> 06:47.212 Ricky and Steve- So it's quite a creepy name. 06:47.372 --> 06:49.553 But yeah, she- she jams a biro right into his neck. 06:49.813 --> 07:18.692 yeah she should have used a week crunchy but now she won't be able to and of course pot noodles uh the golden wonder pot noodle will be oh thank you what no yeah no pot and pot noodles a billion dollar industry well you'd think so people will die if they withdraw pot noodles i think they will but maybe none of this will happen because maybe uh whoever has uh assumed control of golden wonder will carry on these brands but spice as well it doesn't look likely she should bear some of the guilt that's right yeah anybody who's soiled their 07:19.372 --> 07:34.178 pants pants with the walkers with the walkers campaign absolutely well i think it's a it's a shocking day it's a shocking shocking day uh now i'm gonna play some weird music now sorry about that but this is um going out to our friend garth 07:34.758 --> 07:43.010 who yesterday I was supposed to be meeting him and I phoned up to see what his progress was because he was running a little late and he was all flustered and he said, someone's just nicked my bike. 07:43.330 --> 07:46.935 I just saw them nick it off the, like, right from outside where I work. 07:47.336 --> 07:49.278 I saw them cycle off and I'd been running after them. 07:49.458 --> 07:50.620 How awful is that? 07:50.660 --> 07:51.962 Not only to have your bike nicked. 07:52.082 --> 07:54.944 which is a miserable feeling, to see the perpetrator. 07:55.264 --> 08:00.147 And what's worse is that it had happened before he'd gone out and caught someone about to steal his bike. 08:00.167 --> 08:01.567 So how's weird music gonna help him? 08:01.708 --> 08:03.969 Isn't it just gonna make him feel more depressed and spaced out? 08:04.109 --> 08:05.370 It might do, but check this out. 08:05.410 --> 08:08.411 When- the time he caught the guy before, he said, Oi! 08:08.431 --> 08:09.012 What are you doing? 08:09.032 --> 08:09.612 That's my bike! 08:10.132 --> 08:12.594 The guy said, Oh well, you can't blame me for trying. 08:13.561 --> 08:14.001 It's true. 08:14.182 --> 08:14.922 It's not true. 08:14.962 --> 08:15.222 It's true. 08:15.243 --> 08:15.643 You can. 08:15.663 --> 08:17.605 I'm pretty sure you can blame him for trying. 08:18.005 --> 08:19.807 Anyway, Garth, I'm really sorry about your bike. 08:20.107 --> 08:22.369 I hope this song by Pink Floyd cheers you up. 08:31.906 --> 08:33.087 That's Pink Floyd with bike. 08:33.567 --> 08:35.368 There's about a minute and a half of weird noises. 08:35.408 --> 08:36.088 That was weird. 08:36.348 --> 08:40.070 We've certainly helped Garth a bit, but we may have alienated some other listeners. 08:40.951 --> 08:45.674 Shall we play a classic XFM playlist, you know, number to get everybody back on board? 08:45.694 --> 08:47.154 How about some commercials? 08:47.735 --> 08:48.375 Oh, even better. 08:48.395 --> 08:51.417 Yeah, the marvelous mini drama World of Commercials. 08:51.437 --> 08:52.197 We'll be back shortly. 09:17.353 --> 09:21.794 This is XFM. 09:34.796 --> 09:37.276 That was the bravery with honest mistake. 09:37.296 --> 09:40.957 This is Adam and Joe on XFM. 09:41.057 --> 09:42.277 It's time to call in. 09:42.337 --> 09:43.998 You could win something amazing. 09:44.038 --> 09:44.718 Let us begin. 09:47.183 --> 09:49.025 Yes, it's time to play Crap Commentary Corner. 09:49.105 --> 09:49.945 The number is 0871-222-1049. 09:49.965 --> 09:56.631 If you can tell us what movie this commentary clip is taken from and who the two overexcited young men talking are. 09:56.731 --> 09:58.712 Now in this first clip, 10:15.986 --> 10:33.718 These two young actors are very excited about being in the movie They're in and one of them says what I think is the longest and most overcomplicated sentence ever said on any commentary ever and listen how at the end he gets Over excited. 10:34.258 --> 10:34.759 So here we go. 10:34.799 --> 10:44.966 Have a listen to clip number one that which is capable of killing You is the very thing that is worthy of your sympathy and empathy 10:45.766 --> 11:11.842 and nurturing absolutely so to balance that tension of protecting yourself while cultivating within yourself the compassion for the other that is to me the germane component of the relationship that can be extrapolated on a macro level with governments or on an interpersonal level within families that i just love yeah yeah that's amazing did you get that yeah i think i did 11:12.722 --> 11:31.005 that really that makes me want to slightly kill all actors hmm oh eight seven one two two two one oh four nine if you know who that was talking and what film they were talking on here's a second clip uh these are the same two actors now engaging in quite a creepy mutual admiration session 11:31.886 --> 11:37.450 What happens to you and what becomes of you and where you go as a performer in there is staggering. 11:38.070 --> 11:38.371 Thank you. 11:38.391 --> 11:42.694 I think it's a huge challenge for an actor to do what you've done with your part in this movie. 11:42.794 --> 11:43.734 Thank you. 11:44.135 --> 11:48.398 And this is where you literally speak the message of the film. 11:48.498 --> 11:49.599 And I think it's worth. 11:49.639 --> 11:52.341 I was so proud when I heard this the first time. 11:52.401 --> 11:57.464 I was so proud of you for doing that and for doing it so well. 11:57.604 --> 11:59.506 And well, I think after just beautiful. 12:00.641 --> 12:00.801 Mmm. 12:01.442 --> 12:03.685 I love the way he agrees with what the other guy's saying. 12:03.725 --> 12:03.965 Mmm. 12:04.005 --> 12:04.386 You're right. 12:04.566 --> 12:05.207 It was stunning. 12:05.447 --> 12:07.069 That did do it really, really well. 12:08.290 --> 12:08.951 You're correct. 12:09.371 --> 12:11.053 There was a third voice in there as well. 12:11.254 --> 12:12.035 There was, yes. 12:12.095 --> 12:12.835 I'm agreeing back there. 12:13.136 --> 12:14.738 Extra points for telling us who that is. 12:14.758 --> 12:15.959 0-8-7-1-2-2-2-1-0-4-9 There's one more clip. 12:18.522 --> 12:19.662 Well, we should play it a bit later on. 12:19.682 --> 12:20.763 We'll play it a bit later, yeah. 12:20.803 --> 12:24.484 So if you know who that was, the numbers 0-8-7-1-triple-2-1-0-4-9. 12:25.104 --> 12:26.805 If you want to win a prize, call now! 12:27.045 --> 12:28.765 That was a really tough one, though. 12:28.785 --> 12:30.146 I'm absolutely stumped by that. 12:30.246 --> 12:30.546 Are you? 12:30.686 --> 12:30.986 Yeah. 12:31.226 --> 12:32.446 I think it's easy peasy. 12:32.566 --> 12:33.127 I'm stumpy. 12:33.387 --> 12:34.567 It's their famous film. 12:34.747 --> 12:34.987 Is it? 12:35.307 --> 12:35.427 Mmm. 12:35.928 --> 12:36.508 Their famous. 12:36.928 --> 12:38.208 Uh, recent famous film? 12:38.388 --> 12:39.669 Their recent famous film. 12:39.689 --> 12:40.089 Oh, right. 12:40.129 --> 12:40.409 Yeah. 12:42.114 --> 12:44.235 That's not an impression of anybody or anything. 12:44.255 --> 12:45.296 It's not a clue. 12:45.316 --> 12:46.857 It's a stupid voice. 12:48.217 --> 12:49.218 OK, let's play some music. 12:49.758 --> 12:53.340 This is The Raconteurs right now with Steady As She Goes. 13:05.396 --> 13:08.319 Oh, I feel like I've been on an incredible rock journey. 13:08.339 --> 13:09.400 That was good, I enjoyed that. 13:09.440 --> 13:19.228 That's the raconteurs with Steady As She Goes, a quartet from Detroit who are releasing their debut album Broken Boy Soldiers on XL Records. 13:19.369 --> 13:20.269 Broken Boy Soldiers. 13:20.309 --> 13:23.893 Broken Boy Soldiers on XL on May the 15th. 13:24.233 --> 13:26.114 Just nailing home there the futility of war. 13:26.795 --> 13:27.396 Yeah, that's a good point. 13:27.416 --> 13:28.717 Especially when kids are involved. 13:29.017 --> 13:29.858 Absolutely. 13:29.898 --> 13:31.840 I forgot about the futility of it for a second. 13:31.860 --> 13:32.020 Yeah. 13:32.040 --> 13:32.721 Don't forget that. 13:32.741 --> 13:33.161 Mm-mm. 13:33.342 --> 13:34.483 This is Adam and Jo on XFM. 13:34.503 --> 13:36.245 We're in the middle of playing crap commentary corner. 13:36.625 --> 13:37.125 You know what? 13:37.306 --> 13:38.066 No one's getting it. 13:38.206 --> 13:41.049 It's one of the biggest films of the last few years. 13:41.850 --> 13:43.352 Everyone out there, you've seen it. 13:43.572 --> 13:43.792 Yeah. 13:44.092 --> 13:44.753 No one's getting it. 13:44.773 --> 13:45.654 Shall we speak to someone? 13:45.794 --> 13:47.656 Let's see if someone has got it. 13:48.036 --> 13:49.498 Who is this we've got on the telephone? 13:49.518 --> 13:49.678 Lydia. 13:49.998 --> 13:50.299 Lydia. 13:51.059 --> 13:52.380 Oh, have you met Lydia? 13:52.700 --> 13:55.121 Oh, Lydia, the Tattoo Lady. 13:55.381 --> 13:58.862 Yeah, that's- that used to be on the Muppet Show album, that's why I know that song. 13:58.882 --> 13:59.522 Yeah, same here. 13:59.662 --> 14:00.502 Do you get that a lot, Lydia? 14:00.803 --> 14:01.583 I do, actually, yes. 14:02.003 --> 14:02.223 Yeah. 14:02.343 --> 14:03.484 Where's that song come from, then? 14:03.524 --> 14:04.344 The Muppet Show album. 14:04.364 --> 14:06.225 I know, but they didn't write the song originally. 14:06.265 --> 14:07.525 They wrote all the songs! 14:07.645 --> 14:08.265 No, they never. 14:08.285 --> 14:09.306 The Muppets wrote all of them. 14:09.346 --> 14:11.606 They wrote Muh-Nuh-Muh-Nuh and Halfway Up The Stairs. 14:11.626 --> 14:12.567 No, they never. 14:13.087 --> 14:13.647 Lydia, hello. 14:14.568 --> 14:15.008 Hello. 14:15.028 --> 14:16.568 How's Saturday going for you today? 14:16.588 --> 14:17.889 Going fine, thank you very much. 14:17.929 --> 14:18.409 What are you up to? 14:19.281 --> 14:20.464 Um, not much to be honest. 14:20.664 --> 14:22.888 I've just come back from travelling, so I'm just relaxing. 14:22.908 --> 14:23.309 Traveling? 14:24.191 --> 14:24.391 Yes. 14:24.431 --> 14:25.212 Like some sort of hippie? 14:25.774 --> 14:26.795 Yes, like some sort of hippie. 14:26.815 --> 14:28.098 I've got long hair beads and everything. 14:28.258 --> 14:29.040 Where's your caravan? 14:29.080 --> 14:30.042 You've parked your caravan. 14:30.715 --> 14:31.976 No, I didn't caravan. 14:31.996 --> 14:34.798 And your, er, children are out rummaging through dustbins. 14:35.578 --> 14:36.338 It's funny that, isn't it? 14:36.418 --> 14:37.859 Some people say, oh, I've just been on holiday. 14:37.899 --> 14:39.060 Other people say, I've been travelling. 14:39.720 --> 14:40.161 Oh, OK. 14:40.261 --> 14:43.563 I think in future, I'm going to say I've been travelling in future. 14:43.583 --> 14:45.624 It just sounds more sophisticated, doesn't it? 14:45.724 --> 14:48.406 Well, I've been on holiday implies, like, a two-week break. 14:48.446 --> 14:50.147 Yeah, I've been travelling to Benidorm. 14:50.327 --> 14:54.449 I've been travelling implies, like, several months in South America or something. 14:54.469 --> 14:57.451 Well, it implies an inward journey as well as an outward journey, doesn't it, Lydia? 14:58.647 --> 15:12.541 myself and everything did you find yourself what's your favorite part of yourself that you discovered anyway you can ask me the question oh she's telling us to shut up yeah yeah okay who do you think it is i think it's jake giving hall and breakback mountain why do you think that 15:13.786 --> 15:30.582 because um it sounds like his voice first of all and the thing they're talking about they're kind of skirting around the subject what it is and that big long sentence Jake uh Jake Gyllenhaal or Gyllenhaal he's he's he's not a uh pretentious ponce though is he he seems to be a straightforward guy yeah i never never thought that before but 15:31.454 --> 15:33.115 I was both sentenced, wasn't it? 15:33.275 --> 15:33.736 Yeah. 15:33.756 --> 15:34.136 Yeah. 15:34.196 --> 15:34.957 No, she's wrong. 15:35.017 --> 15:36.078 I'm sorry about that, Lydia. 15:36.098 --> 15:41.362 You're wrong, but can we offer you a copy of Vanity Fair on DVD as a sort of a consolation prize? 15:41.542 --> 15:42.082 Yeah, that'd be great. 15:42.382 --> 15:42.863 There we go. 15:42.903 --> 15:50.308 Well, if you stay on the line and Xanthi will take your details, thank you for calling and thank you for trying and we're glad you found yourself. 15:50.469 --> 15:51.249 Yeah, exactly. 15:51.709 --> 15:53.511 So, listen, we might have someone who's got it. 15:53.951 --> 15:54.632 Shall we talk to them? 15:54.832 --> 15:56.313 Well, let's play another clip first, shall we? 15:56.333 --> 15:57.134 Let's play another clip. 15:57.774 --> 15:58.434 OK, here we go. 15:58.494 --> 15:59.615 Here is the third clip. 15:59.635 --> 16:08.040 So in this clip, our acting friends are getting so excited about what they're watching on the screen that one of them has a little accident. 16:09.841 --> 16:13.903 But this guy here on the wall, that is just stunning. 16:14.223 --> 16:18.686 And this, the religious iconography of this moment. 16:19.847 --> 16:22.388 Oh, dear. 16:22.688 --> 16:23.409 That was a quick one. 16:23.449 --> 16:24.509 I think he had a little accident. 16:25.730 --> 16:26.731 So is Lorna on the line? 16:26.751 --> 16:27.271 Hello, Lorna. 16:28.493 --> 16:29.013 Hello, Lorna. 16:29.213 --> 16:29.553 Are you there? 16:29.573 --> 16:29.853 Hello. 16:30.013 --> 16:30.554 I'm here. 16:30.574 --> 16:30.994 Can you hear me? 16:31.054 --> 16:31.734 Yes, we can hear you. 16:31.894 --> 16:32.174 Yeah. 16:32.214 --> 16:32.694 Hello. 16:32.954 --> 16:33.414 Hello. 16:33.554 --> 16:34.455 You sound nice. 16:34.955 --> 16:35.575 Thank you. 16:35.635 --> 16:36.815 What are you up to? 16:37.516 --> 16:38.436 I'm at work, actually. 16:38.536 --> 16:38.756 Are you? 16:38.776 --> 16:39.516 What are you working at? 16:39.876 --> 16:42.977 I'm a fashion designer and I'm doing some silk screen printing at the moment. 16:43.457 --> 16:44.118 Wow. 16:44.278 --> 16:45.238 That's cool. 16:45.578 --> 16:47.158 Fashion designers listen to our show. 16:47.278 --> 16:49.899 What sort of a design is on your silk screen? 16:50.679 --> 16:54.340 It's a sort of 1920s type of looking thing. 16:55.181 --> 16:55.881 That sounds fabulous. 16:56.667 --> 16:57.067 Thank you. 16:57.147 --> 16:57.428 Doesn't it? 16:57.768 --> 16:58.629 Yeah, that sounds nice. 16:58.669 --> 17:00.090 Can, if you, you know, can we have one? 17:01.011 --> 17:04.293 No, unfortunately for ladies, well you can, it's a dress, so if you want one. 17:04.473 --> 17:05.514 Can you make us a man dress? 17:06.195 --> 17:06.455 Yes. 17:06.675 --> 17:07.976 Like Pete, Pete Burns? 17:08.056 --> 17:08.376 A mess. 17:08.637 --> 17:08.857 Yeah. 17:08.917 --> 17:09.457 Definitely. 17:10.038 --> 17:11.819 Lorna, Lorna, who do you think it is? 17:12.340 --> 17:15.262 I think it's Brian Austin and Elijah Wood from Fellowship of the Rings. 17:15.562 --> 17:17.884 Now you don't mean Brian Austin, do you? 17:17.924 --> 17:21.487 Wasn't he in, wasn't he in Beverly Hills 9021's era? 17:21.507 --> 17:22.428 You mean Sean Astin? 17:23.717 --> 17:25.158 Hello, I think you've faded Lorna down. 17:25.178 --> 17:25.979 There you go, sorry. 17:26.079 --> 17:26.759 Are you back, Lorna? 17:27.020 --> 17:28.961 Sean Astin, that's who I meant, I'm terribly sorry. 17:28.981 --> 17:30.302 You're absolutely correct, well done. 17:30.322 --> 17:35.266 Uh, that was Sean Astin and Elijah Wood and in the background with the deep voice Andy Serkis. 17:35.646 --> 17:37.587 And that's from the commentary of, do you know which movie it is? 17:38.228 --> 17:38.969 Fellowship of the Ring? 17:39.589 --> 17:41.250 Uh, it's The Two Towers, but we'll give you that. 17:41.270 --> 17:41.891 Thank you. 17:41.971 --> 17:46.694 And Sean Astin revealing himself to be, you know, very enthusiastic and analytical. 17:47.095 --> 17:48.676 Well, he was a child star, you know. 17:49.079 --> 17:49.439 He was. 17:49.479 --> 17:52.701 Yeah, and he'd only been in the Goonies, really, up till then, so it must have been very exciting for him. 17:53.101 --> 17:58.884 Apparently he's written a book about the making of Lord of the Rings, in which he makes a bit of an idiot of himself as well. 17:59.224 --> 18:00.384 He's... Sounds like he would. 18:00.484 --> 18:01.605 He is clinically insane. 18:01.625 --> 18:03.746 I just want to play that clip again of him analysing it. 18:03.766 --> 18:04.606 Do you want the first one again? 18:04.626 --> 18:04.746 Yeah. 18:04.766 --> 18:05.907 Where are we? 18:07.000 --> 18:16.947 That which is capable of killing you is the very thing that is worthy of your sympathy and empathy and nurturing. 18:17.087 --> 18:17.647 Absolutely. 18:17.787 --> 18:26.873 So to balance that tension of protecting yourself while cultivating within yourself the compassion for the other. 18:27.274 --> 18:36.820 That is to me the germane component of the relationship that can be extrapolated on a macro level for governments or on an interpersonal level within families that I just love. 18:37.741 --> 18:40.484 That is the Jermaine, yeah, whatever he said. 18:40.524 --> 18:42.326 What things that he said there. 18:42.366 --> 18:43.568 Well done Lorna, that's very good. 18:43.588 --> 18:44.369 What does Lorna win? 18:45.350 --> 18:48.553 Well I tell you what, we can give Lorna a choice of things to win. 18:48.573 --> 18:55.982 You can either have an Adam and Joe DVD or a pair of tickets to see The Darkness at Alexandra Palace this Tuesday or Wednesday. 18:56.042 --> 18:56.703 Or maybe both. 18:57.083 --> 19:08.969 or maybe both because she did really well there yeah we can't give her a fist of fury you're a lady you don't like kicking anyway little foreign men kicking each other do you no not really no you don't like that uh so what do you want 19:09.986 --> 19:11.226 I'd throw your DVD, actually. 19:11.287 --> 19:12.047 Hey! 19:12.227 --> 19:13.467 What a sensible load. 19:13.867 --> 19:14.748 I tell you what we'll sign it for. 19:14.768 --> 19:16.348 You bought it on the cellophane so you can throw it away. 19:16.608 --> 19:17.189 Yes, exactly. 19:17.209 --> 19:20.270 Would you rather we signed it permanently or in a throw-away-able fashion? 19:20.430 --> 19:21.630 Permanently, please. 19:21.750 --> 19:22.311 Oh, come on. 19:22.331 --> 19:23.511 Hey, Lorna, thanks so much for calling. 19:23.531 --> 19:24.531 Well done getting that right. 19:24.711 --> 19:28.653 And well done helping us expose Sean Astin as a bit too keen. 19:40.196 --> 19:43.338 Hard to be for history on Nick Grange, I think you'll agree. 19:43.378 --> 19:45.079 The Associates with Party Fears 2. 19:45.519 --> 19:47.000 Now, when was that released, Adam? 19:47.421 --> 19:49.682 Man, that must have been about 81 or something. 19:49.742 --> 19:50.322 There you go. 19:50.603 --> 19:52.764 It could have been ripped out of today's charts, don't you think? 19:52.924 --> 19:53.544 Yeah, it's true. 19:53.625 --> 19:54.685 Very Contempo sound. 19:54.705 --> 19:55.266 Amazing. 19:55.446 --> 19:56.166 But yet it's old. 19:56.346 --> 19:56.807 That's right. 19:56.947 --> 19:58.468 Now, we're going to do a little shout-out right now. 19:58.528 --> 19:59.688 We don't do very many of these. 20:00.109 --> 20:03.131 But this is a shout-out for Lewis Wootton. 20:03.973 --> 20:04.613 Lewis Wooten. 20:04.653 --> 20:06.434 Yeah, he's- isn't he from Wales, from Cardiff? 20:06.675 --> 20:07.375 What does it say on it? 20:07.395 --> 20:09.716 He's put an S-A-E in there. 20:10.117 --> 20:10.377 Oh yeah. 20:10.517 --> 20:13.439 He sent us the inner sleeve to his Adam and Joe DVD to sign. 20:13.959 --> 20:15.840 And, er, he's written a very sweet note. 20:16.060 --> 20:17.541 Klandaff in Cardiff. 20:17.801 --> 20:18.041 Yeah. 20:18.242 --> 20:18.922 Yeah, thanks for that. 20:19.082 --> 20:41.446 yeah thanks man we really appreciate that you can't you know this emails are fine but a nice note a little scrap of paper with some lovely meaningful handwriting on it that's wonderful isn't it yeah we're gonna sign up your sleeve real good and thanks very much to matt pool as well who sent us some uh some groovy t-shirts anything like that it's nice you know something with a personal touch is always wonderful to receive and i hope uh 20:43.513 --> 20:45.456 Like a big punch from my fist. 20:45.556 --> 20:47.198 Here's a big advertising punch for you. 20:47.218 --> 20:47.919 We'll be back shortly. 20:48.600 --> 20:49.742 This is XFM. 21:14.076 --> 21:16.658 Love music. 21:18.319 --> 21:19.139 Love XFM. 21:35.152 --> 21:35.633 Who's that then? 21:35.753 --> 21:36.693 That's the Monkees, isn't it? 21:36.813 --> 21:37.254 Who are they? 21:37.334 --> 21:38.234 The Arctic Monkees. 21:38.314 --> 21:39.135 Ah, never get anywhere. 21:39.155 --> 21:41.937 This is Adam and Joel on XFM. 21:42.277 --> 21:49.823 And listen, we should apologise, because one or two people found that Associates track we played before the break a little bit confusing. 21:50.183 --> 21:50.743 Confusing? 21:50.843 --> 21:51.224 Yeah. 21:51.344 --> 21:54.466 Well, I think it's the job of the free play to confuse a challenge. 21:54.486 --> 21:54.886 To confuse, yeah. 21:54.946 --> 21:59.650 You know that's also, a clip from that is used as the theme tune to WeekEnding on Radio 4. 21:59.750 --> 22:00.110 Used to be. 22:00.290 --> 22:00.910 Yeah, that's right. 22:00.930 --> 22:01.491 Yeah, there you go. 22:01.511 --> 22:02.171 It's a very famous song. 22:02.211 --> 22:04.152 What did they find upsetting and confusing about it? 22:04.192 --> 22:07.713 Oh, we've had texts with the words cat strangling in them. 22:07.993 --> 22:08.673 Oh, no, no. 22:08.693 --> 22:09.474 I'm not having that. 22:09.514 --> 22:10.494 The warbling. 22:10.534 --> 22:12.755 His style of vocals was very innovative, wasn't it? 22:13.035 --> 22:17.217 It's brilliant just because everyone sounds like a kind of football yob now in their bands. 22:17.765 --> 22:18.426 I'm not having it. 22:18.526 --> 22:19.787 I want- I want gay warbling. 22:20.147 --> 22:21.148 All the way. 22:21.548 --> 22:22.749 So listen, let's move on though. 22:22.769 --> 22:34.798 Um, if you've been watching telly recently, listeners, you might have seen an advert for a brand of toothpaste with a handsome young man, uh, telling us how brilliantly this toothpaste both whitens his teeth and, uh, cleans them. 22:35.359 --> 22:36.019 Two in one whitening. 22:36.039 --> 22:37.620 He doesn't have to make the choice anymore. 22:37.640 --> 22:39.262 Uh, he's a handsome young man. 22:39.702 --> 22:47.088 He's doing one of these testimonials, not into the camera, off camera, being interviewed objectively by a completely independent toothpaste authority, probably. 22:47.889 --> 22:52.800 Um, but this man's name, it says in the bottom left hand side of the screen, is Paul Kahana. 22:53.341 --> 22:54.283 How do you spell Kahana? 22:54.303 --> 22:55.666 K-H-A-N-N-A. 22:55.747 --> 22:56.989 Paul, how would you spell that? 22:57.210 --> 22:57.511 Kah-na? 22:58.106 --> 22:59.066 How would you pronounce it, you mean? 22:59.086 --> 23:00.286 Yes, sorry, pronounce it. 23:00.727 --> 23:01.567 Er... Khana. 23:01.647 --> 23:02.067 Khana. 23:02.307 --> 23:02.727 Khana. 23:02.987 --> 23:04.027 But anyway, that's not the point. 23:04.107 --> 23:04.427 Khana. 23:04.667 --> 23:06.448 It says below that that he's a screenwriter. 23:07.368 --> 23:09.648 It says Paul Khana, screenwriter. 23:09.928 --> 23:15.229 And listen, I've recorded the advert, I've used er... I've taken out the name of the actual product. 23:15.349 --> 23:15.530 Yeah. 23:15.970 --> 23:17.950 And er, replaced it with the help of Prince. 23:18.630 --> 23:22.071 So here is the advert, just in case you remember it. 23:22.331 --> 23:26.372 I noticed that my teeth were yellowing, but I didn't want to choose between whitening and protection. 23:26.672 --> 23:26.952 I tried... 23:28.883 --> 23:31.988 Soon, not only were my teeth whiter, but my whole mouth looked healthier. 23:33.691 --> 23:36.375 It's clinically proven to help restore the natural white of teeth. 23:36.676 --> 23:37.537 I could see the difference. 23:39.369 --> 23:40.570 complete 12-hour protection. 23:40.670 --> 23:41.390 It's my choice. 23:41.731 --> 23:42.111 There you go. 23:42.131 --> 23:44.212 So there he is, Paul Kahana. 23:44.432 --> 23:44.692 Yeah. 23:44.773 --> 23:47.514 Screenwriter, telling us about that brand of toothpaste. 23:47.815 --> 23:49.616 Protection, whitening, whitening, protection. 23:49.656 --> 23:51.037 Yeah, so I thought that's interesting. 23:51.057 --> 23:52.618 Uh, he's a screenwriter. 23:52.638 --> 23:53.498 I wonder what he's written. 23:54.059 --> 23:55.960 So, and you can do this too if you'll buy a computer. 23:55.980 --> 24:03.325 I went on the internet movie database and put in Paul Kahana, K-H-A-N-N-A, uh, because here he is talking about the product. 24:04.506 --> 24:05.166 Should we trust him? 24:05.307 --> 24:06.308 What are his credentials? 24:06.328 --> 24:07.850 What's he actually written? 24:08.250 --> 24:09.972 So I put him in the Internet Movie Database. 24:10.253 --> 24:11.194 He's only got one credit. 24:11.915 --> 24:14.177 It says he wrote, directed and produced Running on Empty. 24:15.271 --> 24:42.077 that's a big movie oh yeah with River Phoenix and Martha Plimpton yeah but I thought it was directed by Sidney Lumet uh-huh it turns out of course that the running on empty he directed was actually a four-minute short film that won the Heinz short film competition and his other credits are as an actor in Basil Brush as an SAS man in Ultimate Force and as Guy Lard Lasker in Spooks I don't know who Guy Lard Lasker is Spooks 24:43.013 --> 24:44.935 Uh, so they seem to be lying to us. 24:45.255 --> 24:46.276 Well, that's not lying. 24:46.437 --> 24:48.038 Come on, that's an impressive CV he's got there. 24:48.078 --> 24:54.465 Yeah, but they say he's a screenwriter, and he's written a four-minute film about beans for Heinz. 24:54.485 --> 24:55.786 We have probably just another commercial. 24:55.846 --> 24:57.928 Technically, he's a screenwriter. 24:58.088 --> 25:01.372 Are you a screenwriter if you write a four-minute film? 25:02.617 --> 25:14.495 yes yes yeah right but well yeah what if it doesn't get well just because i did some decoration does that mean i'm a decorator yeah well yeah yeah you know what i'm saying 25:15.969 --> 25:19.290 Anyway, it's a very famous brand of toothpaste and I don't know, I think they're lying to us. 25:19.890 --> 25:26.572 So it's just a warning to listeners, if you watch that commercial and you think, I'm going to trust that guy's opinion on toothpaste, he's a screenwriter. 25:27.072 --> 25:27.693 Don't believe it. 25:27.713 --> 25:28.873 Because he's not. 25:29.993 --> 25:30.353 The end. 25:30.413 --> 25:35.515 But do you want them to sort of put a caveat and say sort of not particularly successful screenwriter? 25:35.535 --> 25:36.415 Amateur screenwriter. 25:36.975 --> 25:38.576 I think amateur screenwriter. 25:38.616 --> 25:39.696 Why didn't they just put actor? 25:39.776 --> 25:40.796 He's a successful actor. 25:40.836 --> 25:41.777 He's been in Basil Brush. 25:41.837 --> 25:42.817 What more would an actor want? 25:43.197 --> 25:43.697 That's right, yeah. 25:43.717 --> 25:44.458 Just put actor. 25:44.838 --> 25:49.901 I'd, I'd listen to an actor quicker than I'd listen to a screen, to a screenwriter about tooth cleanliness. 25:50.501 --> 25:51.962 Cos actors appear in the public eye. 25:52.062 --> 25:55.844 But if you put actor on, on someone who's appearing in a commercial... Nah, you won't believe them, will you? 25:55.864 --> 25:56.344 That's true. 25:56.444 --> 25:56.904 That's true. 25:57.264 --> 25:58.945 But anyway, don't trust Paul Kohana. 26:00.046 --> 26:00.986 Says Joe Cornish. 26:01.246 --> 26:01.467 Thanks. 26:11.852 --> 26:14.113 That's OK Go with A Million Ways. 26:14.133 --> 26:17.675 You're listening to Adam and Joe on XFM this Saturday afternoon. 26:17.695 --> 26:19.116 What are you doing, Joe Cornish? 26:19.136 --> 26:21.137 Are we out there talking to the 19th sexiest man in the world? 26:21.277 --> 26:21.537 Yeah. 26:21.738 --> 26:22.618 Alex Zane's still there. 26:22.658 --> 26:26.320 And you know, as two sexy men, we have to chat about, you know, the latest sexy news. 26:26.941 --> 26:27.801 How to stay sexy. 26:28.902 --> 26:29.522 Sexy tips. 26:29.742 --> 26:31.923 I've put in, we got sent a Deuce Bigelow t-shirt. 26:32.524 --> 26:35.485 It says, Royal Order of European Man Whores. 26:36.106 --> 26:36.766 And I'm wearing it. 26:36.786 --> 26:37.687 That's a good t-shirt. 26:37.707 --> 26:37.887 Yeah. 26:38.267 --> 26:39.348 Did we get sent two? 26:39.368 --> 26:39.408 No. 26:41.175 --> 26:43.997 But I've put it on cleverly and now I've sweated it and do it. 26:44.017 --> 26:44.918 But you can have the other t-shirts. 26:44.938 --> 26:45.498 You can have the other ones. 26:45.518 --> 26:46.719 I don't want the other ones. 26:47.180 --> 26:47.620 You nick. 26:47.800 --> 26:49.762 The other t-shirts are specially made by a listener. 26:49.782 --> 26:51.423 This is a mass-produced piece of rubbish. 26:51.443 --> 26:53.685 You always get in earlier than I do every week. 26:53.705 --> 26:54.325 Well, that's the secret. 26:54.345 --> 26:55.326 You go through the cubbyhole. 26:55.566 --> 26:56.407 You nix the secret. 26:56.467 --> 26:57.328 Everything cool. 26:57.628 --> 26:59.289 Right, we'll be back in a second. 26:59.309 --> 27:04.093 We've got a text competition coming up shortly, a chance for you to win more exciting goodies. 27:04.373 --> 27:05.093 This is in the dock. 27:06.014 --> 27:06.855 This is in the dock. 27:06.875 --> 27:07.716 This is in the dock. 27:08.616 --> 27:12.020 and more chat about the important issues of today. 27:12.060 --> 27:13.041 Stick with us here on XFM. 27:53.714 --> 27:59.818 Yes, it's the Kaiser Chiefs The modern way don't know I'm saying it like that in that fashion. 27:59.838 --> 28:05.141 This is Adam and Joe on xfm podcast news Podcast fans. 28:05.601 --> 28:19.490 I was now I wasn't sure about our podcast status, but apparently it's still being negotiated There's a good chance that there will be Adam and Joe podcasts being produced imminently of old shows and indeed the new ones as well I think that's the case isn't it Xanthi? 28:20.390 --> 28:24.034 So, uh, don't give up hope just yet, if you're waiting for a podcast. 28:24.294 --> 28:27.538 Have you been- Or, if you don't want podcasts, then give up hope. 28:28.527 --> 28:29.287 because they're coming. 28:29.867 --> 28:30.828 Yeah, yeah, exactly. 28:30.848 --> 28:32.969 Uh, well, no, I would s- yeah, anyway. 28:33.549 --> 28:36.810 Um, have you been, uh, downloading any podcasts, Joe? 28:37.750 --> 28:39.651 Uh, no, I don't know, I haven't actually. 28:39.911 --> 28:41.172 Have you not investigated at all? 28:41.432 --> 28:43.232 No, no, not a single podcast, I'm afraid. 28:43.292 --> 28:46.113 I wasted quite a lot of time checking out podcasts this week. 28:46.514 --> 28:50.315 Because, you know, uh, there's video ones as well as audio ones. 28:51.535 --> 29:14.520 and they kind of pop up like a little TV on your iTunes window and you have the option to make them fill the whole screen but man it's rubbish there's a lot of rubbish out there but it's pretty interesting you know it's it's like public access I suppose in a lot of ways and so there's an awful lot of rubbish to sift through but there's some good stuff out there as well and of course the the most popular one I think is Ricky and Stephen's one 29:15.260 --> 29:35.480 it's got about a quarter of a million hits or something or three quarters of a million hits so far which is pretty amazing unprecedented amount of interest but it's still early days for the podcast universe but if you haven't checked it out i recommend you do it's pretty good very funny indeed but mainly carl pilkington actually it should be called just pilking world or pilko vision 29:36.221 --> 29:37.242 But, um, yeah, quite good. 29:37.422 --> 29:42.585 I was thinking, though, that maybe, um, people would like to send us their own sort of podcasts. 29:43.125 --> 29:43.705 Do you know what I mean? 29:44.005 --> 29:53.931 Because basically, most podcasts that I've been downloading this week is just a couple of blokes with a really rubbish microphone and, uh, probably a lot of beer in them as well, talking rubbish. 29:54.471 --> 29:55.611 And he goes on and on and on. 29:55.651 --> 29:58.832 It's the kind of thing that we used to do quite a lot, Joe, when we were younger. 29:59.813 --> 30:03.134 But I was thinking it might be fun to hear some of the ones that people send in. 30:03.934 --> 30:05.635 I'm sure no one will take us up on this. 30:06.115 --> 30:07.435 But maybe- They're long though, aren't they? 30:07.455 --> 30:10.196 We can't have people sending in really long things because we'll never be able to play them. 30:10.236 --> 30:10.736 I know, I know. 30:10.776 --> 30:11.937 But just like a couple of minutes. 30:12.597 --> 30:18.680 Like two minutes of no music, just chat, of you talking about stuff that you think is interesting with your mates. 30:18.760 --> 30:19.881 I'd be interested to hear that. 30:19.961 --> 30:20.741 OK, that's a challenge. 30:20.841 --> 30:21.501 That's a challenge. 30:21.661 --> 30:22.242 Send it in. 30:22.282 --> 30:24.243 What's the address that people send stuff into, Xanthi? 30:24.263 --> 30:24.743 What do you think? 30:24.863 --> 30:26.164 XFM, Leicester Square. 30:26.184 --> 30:27.464 30, Leicester Square. 30:27.484 --> 30:28.345 Number 30, Leicester Square. 30:28.365 --> 30:28.385 W1. 30:28.405 --> 30:30.166 W1, London. 30:32.307 --> 30:41.474 and address it to Adam and Joe, or maybe just Adam Buxton because I'm not sure Joe's very interested in listening to the podcasts from our listeners, but I really would be, okay? 30:42.315 --> 30:44.016 I recommend you check out- what are you reading there, Joe? 30:44.316 --> 30:46.918 Nothing, I'm just lining up something, something exciting. 30:47.058 --> 30:47.579 In your brain? 30:47.699 --> 30:47.959 Yeah. 30:48.359 --> 30:50.641 Yeah, clearly, because you're not engaging with me about podcasts. 30:50.661 --> 30:54.644 No, I am, I'm listening, that's a great idea, I'm looking forward to getting the podcast genuinely, it's gonna be exciting! 30:54.664 --> 30:55.285 Okay, good. 30:56.065 --> 30:58.386 Um, and, er- Plus I've got Sneak magazine. 30:58.706 --> 30:59.087 What have you got? 30:59.107 --> 31:00.247 That is Sneak magazine. 31:00.267 --> 31:01.408 Is that a new lady magazine? 31:01.488 --> 31:01.568 Yeah. 31:01.708 --> 31:04.029 It's hard to keep my eyes off the latest Preston news. 31:04.569 --> 31:05.870 What's- what is the latest Preston news? 31:05.950 --> 31:07.391 He- he's keen to be in EastEnders. 31:07.791 --> 31:08.531 And you know what I was thinking? 31:08.551 --> 31:10.912 I was thinking, wow, Preston, he's played it really well. 31:11.332 --> 31:13.313 Before Celebrity Big Brother, he was nobody. 31:13.533 --> 31:13.714 Yeah. 31:13.874 --> 31:18.296 Now, a month later, he's the most famous man in Britain, and he's gonna get a part in EastEnders. 31:18.956 --> 31:45.340 that's right but how long can it go on for forever forever because he's genuinely talented yeah yeah and it's the single still in the charts yeah boys will be boys oh yeah it's going up and up and up and up yeah the address is xfm p.o box 1049 london wc2 h7 la for your mini podcast xfm p.o box 1049 london wc2 7 la how much more enthusiastic can you get than that no that's true that was amazing 31:45.640 --> 31:52.922 So listen, in a second, after this record or whatever we're doing next, I'd like to play you some of my highlights from American Idol that's been on telly on Sunday afternoons. 31:53.042 --> 31:53.362 Oh yeah. 31:53.382 --> 31:57.163 That's provided some of the funniest stuff on telly at the moment, I think. 31:57.403 --> 31:57.883 Fantastic. 31:57.903 --> 32:01.124 Well, before that, we've got Morning Runner with Burning Benches. 32:10.826 --> 32:12.926 That's Morning Runner with Burning Benches. 32:13.447 --> 32:14.647 Why would you want to burn a bench? 32:15.554 --> 32:16.287 on your morning run. 32:17.441 --> 32:18.202 Yeah, you reckon? 32:18.322 --> 32:21.104 Very destructive to the park area and should be stopped, I think. 32:21.344 --> 32:23.326 Go and have a... Why would you burn a bench? 32:23.366 --> 32:24.186 It's insanity. 32:24.226 --> 32:25.567 Why, you usually burn bridges. 32:25.888 --> 32:26.228 Yeah. 32:26.508 --> 32:27.509 They've burnt benches. 32:27.529 --> 32:27.589 Why? 32:28.310 --> 32:29.931 Yeah, just so people can't sit on them. 32:29.951 --> 32:30.291 Don't know? 32:30.531 --> 32:33.734 Well, maybe someone who's a fan of that band can tell us why they're called that. 32:33.794 --> 32:36.076 To deal with, er, as an anti-tramp measure or something. 32:36.116 --> 32:39.158 Maybe, yeah, tramps clogging up the place with their stinky habits. 32:39.178 --> 32:39.919 They're fed up with it. 32:39.959 --> 32:41.120 They'd rather burn the benches. 32:41.300 --> 32:41.720 Yeah. 32:42.060 --> 32:44.182 I bet they might accidentally burn some tramps. 32:44.342 --> 32:44.782 They're killers. 32:45.703 --> 32:46.844 A song there by murderers. 32:47.084 --> 32:47.565 Murderers. 32:47.705 --> 32:48.505 Tramp, murderers. 32:48.846 --> 32:50.207 Allegedly, Morning Runner. 32:50.667 --> 32:54.570 Um, now, er, I keep trying to get my head round Deal or No Deal. 32:54.690 --> 32:57.493 Yes, Noel Edmonds's smash hit new Channel 4 game show. 32:57.893 --> 33:00.515 And I know we've spoken about this before, but it's at some length. 33:01.896 --> 33:13.746 Every week I watch it and try and understand what's going on, because I feel excluded by the thing, because I just think, surely this can't just be a question of randomly selecting one of 20 numbers for an entire half hour. 33:14.386 --> 33:17.969 but it is, that is exactly what it is. 33:18.389 --> 33:23.172 Because Noel so brilliantly dresses the thing up as if there was some strategy involved, you know? 33:23.313 --> 33:26.755 And he convinces you, but then you start thinking, what is the strategy? 33:26.795 --> 33:29.417 Am I too stupid to understand the strategy behind this game? 33:29.857 --> 33:31.198 And no, that's not the case. 33:31.278 --> 33:35.041 I am stupid, but not so stupid that I'm missing a strategy, because there's none! 33:35.061 --> 33:37.623 There's no none strategy in the game whatsoever. 33:37.643 --> 33:41.446 It's a sort of game show for people that like horoscopes and stuff. 33:41.926 --> 33:45.108 believe in fate and luck and magical stones and stuff. 33:45.268 --> 33:46.109 Do you know what I mean? 33:46.169 --> 33:49.611 Yeah, you think that they are, they believe that they are tampering with fate in some way. 33:49.671 --> 33:54.095 Yeah, and that there are lucky people and unlucky people and somehow it's out of your control, the whole thing. 33:54.195 --> 33:54.735 Right, right. 33:55.075 --> 34:00.179 But I must say, I think that it's stretching the definition of the word game, to call it a game. 34:00.999 --> 34:05.643 And basically I wanted people as a text competition this week to come up with some similar formats 34:06.203 --> 34:08.384 And we could make a lot of money out of this as well, you know? 34:08.904 --> 34:14.345 XFM listeners, if you go into business with these ideas, with myself and Joe, we could really clean up. 34:14.385 --> 34:16.566 We've got connections with all the big TV companies. 34:16.586 --> 34:16.866 Oh yeah. 34:16.906 --> 34:17.986 We can float this idea. 34:18.006 --> 34:23.148 There's a few people we haven't alienated in TV and they'd be really happy to. 34:23.588 --> 34:24.709 to get our ideas going. 34:25.249 --> 34:29.872 I've got a few ideas of my own, just to give you some examples of what I'm talking about. 34:30.133 --> 34:38.298 Basically, I want people to come up with some game show formats that require less skill and strategy than Deal or No Deal. 34:38.478 --> 34:40.639 And that's really a difficult thing to do, okay? 34:40.980 --> 34:49.025 Plus, I want you to come up with a has-been presenter to host the whole thing, and a good snappy title for it, okay? 34:49.085 --> 34:50.426 I think that's the formula for success. 34:50.666 --> 34:52.287 That's asking people quite a lot, Adam. 34:52.327 --> 34:54.269 So have you got an example? 34:54.389 --> 34:55.089 Yeah, here we go. 34:55.670 --> 34:57.491 Aim it, bucket, claim it. 34:57.952 --> 34:58.852 Aim it, bucket, claim it. 34:58.912 --> 34:59.273 Like it. 34:59.693 --> 35:00.854 Hosted by Andy Crane. 35:00.934 --> 35:01.154 Yes. 35:01.714 --> 35:03.956 Contestants throw pennies into a bucket. 35:04.236 --> 35:04.497 Yes. 35:04.857 --> 35:09.921 Whoever gets the most pennies in the bucket wins all the pennies in the bucket. 35:10.061 --> 35:10.601 That's good. 35:10.761 --> 35:14.184 Okay, now that actually requires more skill than deal or no deal. 35:14.224 --> 35:15.045 So it's not a perfect example. 35:15.065 --> 35:16.246 Sort of tiddlywinks skills. 35:16.826 --> 35:19.068 Here's another one, the mind jar. 35:19.548 --> 35:19.708 Ooh. 35:19.929 --> 35:21.950 OK, this is a new twist on an old favourite. 35:22.230 --> 35:30.417 Tony Slattery stands by excitedly as a person tries to guess how many beans there are in a large jar of beans. 35:30.437 --> 35:30.757 Brilliant. 35:30.977 --> 35:34.540 OK, how close will they come to guessing correctly? 35:34.680 --> 35:35.041 Brilliant. 35:35.181 --> 35:40.925 OK, now the closest person to the exact number of beans in the jar wins. 35:41.486 --> 35:41.566 Oh. 35:41.866 --> 35:43.748 OK, I bet you didn't think that was good. 35:43.928 --> 35:44.969 And the twist, here's the twist. 35:45.769 --> 35:49.430 Unlike a fairground or school fate version of this game. 35:49.810 --> 36:02.993 This is being televised Wow, okay, that's good deal with that and other titles for this could be has beans Bean battle the bean counters or jar jar beans. 36:03.613 --> 36:07.334 I don't know why there would be a Star Wars pun there Here's one more example. 36:07.414 --> 36:09.115 Okay duel of drool 36:09.795 --> 36:10.796 hosted by Hufti, okay? 36:10.816 --> 36:12.377 Steve Houghton- Hufti from the Word. 36:12.417 --> 36:12.957 Ricky Loves It Exactly. 36:12.977 --> 36:13.418 Steve Houghton- Yeah. 36:13.438 --> 36:25.506 Ricky Loves Contestants have to stand on the Tower of Drool and create a long length of drool that gets as close as possible to the ground without actually touching it before retracting the drool. 36:25.526 --> 36:27.587 Steve Houghton- Yeah, that's a modern toss cartoon you got there. 36:27.607 --> 36:28.188 Ricky Loves Oh, really? 36:28.208 --> 36:28.568 Steve Houghton- Mm. 36:28.588 --> 36:29.949 Ricky Loves Didn't realize that. 36:30.569 --> 36:32.771 Uh, and they're only allowed one glass of orangeade 36:33.291 --> 36:41.195 Before the game starts because you need it to generate the goobers the correct viscosity of goober ism The game could also be called drool Britannia. 36:41.436 --> 36:42.716 Yeah or something. 36:42.756 --> 36:43.697 Who's drooling who? 36:43.917 --> 36:44.237 Yeah. 36:44.277 --> 36:51.001 Yeah Yeah, so listen if you can come up with a with an idea for a game show that's stupider than deal or no deal Yeah requires less skill 36:51.121 --> 37:03.985 yeah, and an over-the-hill presenter, who isn't one of us, who should be presenting it, then text 83XFM, 83XFM, with your ideas for lame game shows, and you'll win an amazing prize. 37:04.025 --> 37:08.107 Tickets to see The Darkness, maybe a DVD, maybe just some kind words. 37:08.187 --> 37:08.767 Yeah, who knows. 37:09.267 --> 37:13.568 Bit more music now, and you will be hearing those American Idol clips when we return. 37:22.625 --> 37:24.487 That's Smile Like You Mean It by The Killers. 37:24.567 --> 37:26.249 This is Adam and Joe on XFM. 37:26.709 --> 37:27.170 Yes, it is. 37:27.630 --> 37:32.636 Now, the American Idol format is a tired format, isn't it, Adam? 37:32.816 --> 37:33.276 And listeners? 37:33.617 --> 37:34.237 You would think so. 37:34.298 --> 37:35.459 It's been on for years now. 37:35.699 --> 37:35.919 Yeah. 37:35.939 --> 37:36.520 Pop Idol. 37:36.720 --> 37:37.661 What was the first one called? 37:37.681 --> 37:38.962 It was Pop Idol, wasn't it? 37:39.123 --> 37:39.723 Yeah. 37:39.763 --> 37:41.045 What was the one with the bands called? 37:42.145 --> 37:43.706 Well, there's Pop Idol, there's X Factor. 37:43.726 --> 37:44.846 There you go, X Factor. 37:45.166 --> 37:46.607 You'd have thought it would have run out of steam. 37:47.087 --> 37:49.568 Even the people, you know, Simon Cowell looks exhausted by it. 37:49.648 --> 37:52.028 Everybody just, you know, it's time for it to die. 37:52.288 --> 37:53.349 But it will not die. 37:54.109 --> 37:56.250 Especially in the audition stages. 37:56.330 --> 38:01.451 And ITV have been showing American Idol, the American version, on Sunday afternoons a double bill. 38:01.831 --> 38:03.952 Do recommend it if you're a bit hungover on Sunday. 38:05.253 --> 38:17.565 and there are just the most incredible loonies auditioning in America and every series they seem to sort of dig deeper into the lunatic barrel, stir more of them up and it's just getting better and better. 38:18.386 --> 38:22.230 I don't recommend you watch it after the auditions when it actually turns into something about singing. 38:22.870 --> 38:28.056 I just think the auditions are amazing and two weeks ago they uncovered a man called Flawless 38:29.216 --> 38:31.217 and I'd like to paint a picture of Flawless. 38:31.257 --> 38:37.598 He's kind of a tall, uh, Ali G-looking kind of, uh, Justin Timberlake gone wrong kind of a figure. 38:37.618 --> 38:42.340 Uh, and the main thing about him is he wears head to do- head to toe pyjamas. 38:42.360 --> 38:43.640 Steve This is a white guy or a black guy? 38:43.660 --> 38:44.240 Ricky It's a white guy. 38:44.300 --> 38:44.500 Steve Yeah. 38:44.520 --> 38:47.261 Ricky Head to do- to toe pyjamas all day long 38:47.981 --> 38:49.242 Er, and pyjama shorts. 38:49.703 --> 38:51.965 What, sort of like nice stripey cotton pyjamas? 38:52.005 --> 38:56.770 No, a big loud checky pattern, and then a little baseball cap which is the same pattern as the pyjamas. 38:57.350 --> 38:59.372 He looks like a big tablecloth basically. 38:59.493 --> 38:59.653 Yeah. 38:59.793 --> 39:06.479 But here, here is Flawless, and, er, this first clip is, er, Flawless telling us how he came up with the name Flawless. 39:06.620 --> 39:07.040 Mmm. 39:07.100 --> 39:09.783 Er, and it was an extraordinary process, as, as you'll hear. 39:10.222 --> 39:13.583 My name is Nick McCoy, but people call me Flawless. 39:13.703 --> 39:27.347 I felt like if I had one with suits on, I might as well go ahead and call my name something that it should be named, which is very appropriate, which therefore is Flawless, was developed out of my mind. 39:28.231 --> 39:29.712 He developed it out of his mind. 39:30.192 --> 39:31.392 Once therefore. 39:32.632 --> 39:34.933 So that's him explaining how he gets his name. 39:35.333 --> 39:40.375 Now let's hear him talking about why he wears these pajamas 24 hours a day. 39:40.395 --> 39:52.459 Most people think of them as pajamas and stuff and uh I don't think of them as pajamas I think of them as very comfortable clothes and very relaxing lingering and I don't know I just like them. 39:54.537 --> 39:56.239 Very relaxing and lingering. 39:56.399 --> 39:56.619 Yeah. 39:56.639 --> 39:58.500 I think it's probably the stink that lingers. 39:59.081 --> 40:01.643 Don't you admire a man that wears pyjamas all day? 40:02.024 --> 40:05.607 Presumably he wears pants though, and I don't mean pants in the American sense. 40:05.627 --> 40:05.967 Underwear? 40:05.987 --> 40:07.708 Well this is a whole can of worms, isn't it? 40:07.749 --> 40:08.970 We should come back to it next week. 40:09.010 --> 40:10.991 Have you ever worn your pyjamas all day? 40:11.572 --> 40:12.813 I've thought about it once. 40:12.833 --> 40:13.794 You don't think you've ever done it? 40:13.974 --> 40:14.154 No. 40:14.614 --> 40:15.495 You see, I have. 40:15.675 --> 40:15.996 Have you? 40:16.116 --> 40:17.297 What about when you're ill and stuff? 40:17.637 --> 40:19.479 Oh, when you're in the house, not like outside. 40:19.519 --> 40:20.940 Yeah, not outside, no. 40:20.980 --> 40:21.700 Not like flawless. 40:21.740 --> 40:25.263 But even in the house, about tea time, it feels very wrong. 40:25.723 --> 40:28.045 Then it starts feeling right again at about seven. 40:28.586 --> 40:31.788 But between about four and seven, you feel evil. 40:31.968 --> 40:32.789 And they still linger. 40:32.809 --> 40:34.910 They feel like they're lingering just as flawless says. 40:35.111 --> 40:36.752 Do you wear PJs still? 40:37.392 --> 40:38.293 No, I sleep naked. 40:38.533 --> 40:38.793 Yeah. 40:38.853 --> 40:40.054 But that's another conversation. 40:40.615 --> 40:41.796 A sexy conversation. 40:42.681 --> 40:44.302 But one more clip of Flawless. 40:45.022 --> 40:49.143 Flawless has a cleaning company, and that's how he makes his money, good or flawless. 40:49.523 --> 40:54.304 And it's got a slogan, and here is the slogan, and also Flawless is thinking behind that slogan. 40:54.504 --> 41:00.926 Presumably if he actually went to a place that was flawless, he'd have no money, he wouldn't be able to, business would collapse. 41:01.386 --> 41:04.727 I'm an entrepreneur and I clean houses. 41:05.668 --> 41:07.728 The name of my business is Paradise Cleaning. 41:08.168 --> 41:10.149 The slogan for that is that 41:12.723 --> 41:20.969 You come home with your house home and House smell like looking me and smell like paradise. 41:21.009 --> 41:28.234 Yes, that's good It takes me a minute to sort of get that out because it's kind of tongue twister and that's where I wanted it to be He wanted it like that. 41:28.434 --> 41:30.235 He wanted it to be You get home and you 41:34.458 --> 41:37.260 You kind of want your house to smell right. 41:37.280 --> 41:38.561 That's a snappy taste line. 41:38.601 --> 41:39.582 Yeah, you were doing it well there. 41:39.602 --> 41:40.463 It's rolling off the tongue. 41:40.483 --> 41:41.183 So that's flawless. 41:41.203 --> 41:51.771 And I do recommend if you're bored on a Sunday afternoon, you watch those American Idol double bills because soon the incredible auditions will be over and it'll be back to idiot people singing competitively. 41:52.031 --> 41:53.092 How are we doing for the text? 41:53.132 --> 41:54.452 Anyone got any ideas coming in? 41:54.552 --> 41:55.473 The text are rolling in. 41:55.813 --> 42:04.538 If you want a reminder of our text competition, we're asking you to come up with game shows that are stupider than Deal or No Deal and a washed-up celebrity to host them. 42:04.778 --> 42:08.500 Stupider's not really the right word, but more sort of... More making something out of nothing. 42:08.620 --> 42:11.301 Yeah, something that requires even less skill and strategy. 42:11.341 --> 42:16.164 Based on the observation that we've made several times on this show that Deal or No Deal could be over in about four minutes. 42:16.644 --> 42:16.904 Yes. 42:17.024 --> 42:22.388 And it's only sort of, uh, Noel Evans' walking psychosis that keeps it going for that long. 42:22.628 --> 42:24.289 His fascinating psychosis. 42:24.869 --> 42:26.971 Uh, some more advertisements right now. 42:26.991 --> 42:30.853 It sort of says what each advertisement is on the computer. 42:31.173 --> 42:35.676 I'm just scanning them and, um, there's some amazing, amazing ones coming up. 42:35.716 --> 42:36.977 I think you're really gonna enjoy it. 42:37.337 --> 42:39.759 I'm particularly excited about the, uh, Tiskily one. 42:40.019 --> 42:40.559 Ah, brilliant. 42:40.599 --> 42:42.401 Um, anyway, this is Edmond Joe on XFM. 42:42.501 --> 42:43.121 Love music. 42:45.523 --> 42:45.923 Thanks FM! 43:16.067 --> 43:16.327 There you go. 43:16.347 --> 43:17.529 That's something to think about, isn't it? 43:17.649 --> 43:19.811 Put that in your pipe and smoke it, yeah? 43:20.532 --> 43:23.475 Speed of sound from the mighty Coldplay. 43:24.036 --> 43:25.878 It's time to put our text competition to bed. 43:25.918 --> 43:33.546 We've been asking you to come up with a stupider, uh, you know, game show that makes something out of nothing in a better way than Noel Edmonds's Deal or No Deal. 43:34.167 --> 43:35.829 That's not an easy task, we appreciate that. 43:35.849 --> 43:36.449 Not an easy task. 43:36.489 --> 43:39.091 But people have been really applying themselves to it in a very impressive way. 43:39.131 --> 43:40.373 Oh, yeah, we've had lots of texts. 43:40.433 --> 43:40.933 Are you ready? 43:40.953 --> 43:41.994 Yeah, come on, hit me. 43:42.294 --> 43:42.915 Here we go. 43:42.935 --> 43:43.535 We're gonna be rich. 43:43.716 --> 43:44.316 Here we go. 43:44.736 --> 43:56.827 How about live televised Snap, the popular card game, preferably with farmyard animal pictures on the cards featuring competing members of the public, hosted by the dude from 90s ITV kids show Nightmare. 43:57.988 --> 43:59.749 From Angela in Hackney PS. 44:00.230 --> 44:04.733 Please can I have an Adam and Joe DVD and she's put her address tar Exclamation mark. 44:04.853 --> 44:07.434 Okay peel or no peel that was good. 44:07.455 --> 44:08.495 Can I just say? 44:08.615 --> 44:15.100 She didn't come up with it with a good title with a snappy title for it But I like the idea. 44:15.460 --> 44:16.280 Okay, here's another one. 44:16.320 --> 44:23.905 This is from Jim in Enfield Peel or no peel get a peeling knife and an apple and try to make the longest length of peel. 44:24.166 --> 44:25.246 That's good That's pretty good. 44:25.266 --> 44:27.208 And then the peeler rings up 44:27.948 --> 44:44.759 he's like an old-style policeman yeah and offers you fruit to the value of I don't know something like that yeah yeah it's gonna make it last an hour peeler the pee did he come up with the peeler no I I threw that in that's really your little hand there Jim little little deformed hand 44:45.680 --> 44:46.521 Uh, what? 44:47.101 --> 44:47.902 Blink and you miss it. 44:48.483 --> 44:51.166 Speaking of which, Blink and you miss it, hosted by Jeremy Beadle. 44:51.547 --> 45:01.339 Contestants stare at the camera and have to blink as few times as possible in ten minutes as the over-the-hill prankster prances around trying to force more blinks out of the contestants. 45:01.479 --> 45:02.879 I've got issues with that one. 45:03.039 --> 45:03.640 From Dazzle. 45:03.960 --> 45:06.580 A- Jeremy Beadle is by no means over the hill. 45:07.041 --> 45:09.201 He's a fully functioning genius, in my opinion. 45:09.241 --> 45:09.741 Yes, it's true. 45:09.901 --> 45:10.482 My opinion too. 45:10.682 --> 45:13.963 And also, uh, that's just a staring competition though, isn't it? 45:14.003 --> 45:15.503 That's the same thing as a staring competition. 45:15.523 --> 45:17.003 Well, Dazzle, you've been d- dissed. 45:17.344 --> 45:18.144 I- I don't hate it. 45:18.224 --> 45:19.384 I'm not- I'm not dissing Dazzle. 45:19.524 --> 45:19.884 Here we go. 45:20.244 --> 45:21.925 Uh, this is by John McKierick. 45:22.905 --> 45:23.305 Uh, what? 45:23.345 --> 45:24.226 No, hang on a second. 45:24.306 --> 45:25.726 No, it's been sent in by Anonymous. 45:25.806 --> 45:28.507 It's presented by John McKierrick, spelt very strangely. 45:29.027 --> 45:30.168 It's called Dog Knows. 45:30.768 --> 45:38.211 Six contestants lie in a line, a dog is unleashed in the studio, and the person who's sent it finds most appealing wins. 45:38.271 --> 45:39.071 That's good, you see. 45:39.091 --> 45:43.693 That's really good, and the dog maybe has to go across some sort of assault course. 45:44.333 --> 45:45.033 That's really good. 45:45.073 --> 45:46.754 It would just go straight for the crotches, though. 45:46.774 --> 45:47.834 It would have to be late night. 45:47.954 --> 45:50.195 That's brilliant, and you wouldn't be able to flinch as well. 45:50.515 --> 46:17.939 yeah that's an anonymous one though uh xanthi quickly use your spy skills to track down who that was how can that be anonymous that was the best one so far yeah it's probably from pulled down uh from no lemons is dog nose spelt k-n oh yes oh yeah uh yeah i like that okay here's another one this is from brian in blackpool it's called not a lottery uh presented by guess who uh it's a lot you like it not a lot you like it paul daniels not a lottery 46:18.439 --> 46:19.080 by Paul Daniel. 46:19.100 --> 46:19.800 That's quite a good impression. 46:20.340 --> 46:21.341 If I don't say so myself. 46:21.661 --> 46:25.204 Someone picks six numbers and doesn't put them on the lottery. 46:25.804 --> 46:29.807 If they don't win on that, then they win a prize. 46:29.827 --> 46:31.988 I like the way he's put on that in. 46:32.148 --> 46:34.510 If they don't win on that, then they win a prize. 46:34.850 --> 46:35.571 That's nonsense. 46:35.591 --> 46:37.011 Well everyone would win a prize, Brian. 46:37.031 --> 46:38.072 You haven't thought that through. 46:38.112 --> 46:40.734 I mean the chances of winning the lottery are a bazillion to one. 46:40.794 --> 46:41.514 It's the stupidest. 46:42.575 --> 46:44.117 Uh, way to waste money in the world. 46:44.137 --> 46:44.217 What? 46:44.377 --> 46:44.958 So bitter. 46:45.138 --> 46:45.878 I hate the lottery. 46:45.898 --> 46:48.301 Um, okay, here's another one. 46:49.182 --> 46:49.922 Uh, this is from Neil. 46:49.982 --> 46:50.843 It's called Are We There Yet? 46:50.883 --> 46:53.326 Contestants sit in a van and play I Spy as they drive along a motorway. 46:53.942 --> 47:18.549 that's quite good quite good from Neil ding-dong or no ding-dong Danny Baker gets people to see if the houses in the street have doorbells or just a knocker contestants speculate which one it is that's pretty good because you could talk like they do on deal or no deal they go on and on it's so are you lucky sue what numbers have you had in your boxes for the last four weeks and then she usually has low as if that's gonna lie have any significance to what's in the box and then you have random you idiot 47:18.649 --> 47:44.754 you have some tense music yeah and then Danny Baker says now you need a knocker if it's a bong that you get you're out of the game now you need a knocker for god's sake well Danny I think I think it's the middle-income neighborhood so they're likely to have knockers because they're slightly classier but they're called the Smiths so maybe it you know that sort of thing yeah brilliant that's really good who's that from that's anonymous as well the cleverest people are anonymous 47:45.254 --> 47:48.455 OK, finally, Red car, blue car, new... new car. 47:48.775 --> 47:49.936 Red car, blue car, new car. 47:50.216 --> 47:51.656 Hosted also by Jeremy Beadle. 47:51.876 --> 47:53.057 There are two cars and a dog. 47:53.337 --> 47:56.018 The player has to guess which car the dog will wee against. 47:56.678 --> 47:58.198 Well, that's like the dog sniffing one. 47:58.518 --> 47:59.739 Louise in Dagenham, bad luck. 47:59.819 --> 48:01.919 If I'd read you out before, the dog knows. 48:02.460 --> 48:03.400 Would have had more impact. 48:03.780 --> 48:07.664 It was good, but it's a bit too much like something they might have had on TFI Friday or something. 48:07.704 --> 48:08.005 Yeah, okay. 48:08.025 --> 48:08.545 Well, here's another one. 48:08.585 --> 48:10.407 Preston's Where's Weller? 48:10.788 --> 48:14.131 Contestants guess where Paul Weller is during a three-hour show. 48:14.872 --> 48:17.335 That's from James... Well, it's printed out weirdly. 48:17.375 --> 48:18.075 James Old? 48:18.396 --> 48:19.697 And who presents it? 48:19.817 --> 48:20.198 Preston. 48:20.698 --> 48:22.259 Yeah, from Big Brother, I suppose. 48:22.319 --> 48:22.839 Is that right? 48:22.859 --> 48:23.479 Where's Weller? 48:23.499 --> 48:24.059 He's not over the hill. 48:24.179 --> 48:24.840 He's on the hill. 48:24.860 --> 48:26.480 Well, no, but he'd do a game show, wouldn't he? 48:26.640 --> 48:27.261 He'd do anything. 48:27.341 --> 48:28.401 He's hovering above the hill. 48:28.421 --> 48:28.941 And so what? 48:29.041 --> 48:33.563 So Paul Weller's just, you know, wherever he is, out shopping or maybe on holiday with friends. 48:33.603 --> 48:34.183 Yeah, exactly. 48:34.223 --> 48:35.904 And it's just a process of guessing. 48:35.924 --> 48:36.664 In the living room. 48:36.924 --> 48:37.885 Yeah, that's good. 48:37.905 --> 48:38.485 That's quite good. 48:38.745 --> 48:39.665 Man, we're in the money. 48:39.825 --> 48:41.066 Let's get Endemol on the phone. 48:41.186 --> 48:45.207 But listen, um, Bong or Knocka or whatever it was called, that was my favourite one. 48:45.608 --> 48:48.449 I think if we can find who sent that in, they should win the prize. 48:48.489 --> 48:49.069 Yeah, there's more. 48:50.014 --> 48:51.015 We've got to get on, man. 48:51.075 --> 48:51.796 The show's almost finished. 48:51.816 --> 48:52.936 You've still got Ditties in the Dock. 48:52.956 --> 48:54.177 Let's play a record and do Ditties. 48:54.338 --> 48:57.620 I was going to play your Losing Ditties from last week. 48:57.680 --> 48:58.001 Oh, yeah. 48:58.101 --> 49:02.104 This is from the most fantastic video game called We Love Katamari. 49:02.124 --> 49:04.166 It's out on the PlayStation 2, came out on Friday. 49:04.406 --> 49:12.032 If you've got £30 to spare and a PS2 and seriously want to play one of the most beautiful, inventive, brilliant video games ever, then go and buy it. 49:12.072 --> 49:13.934 And this is a song from one of the levels. 49:14.274 --> 49:16.296 It's called You Are Smart. 49:26.223 --> 49:27.904 That sounds a bit like Aphex Twin or something. 49:28.104 --> 49:28.704 Well, exactly. 49:29.804 --> 49:30.104 Quite good. 49:30.124 --> 49:30.944 And do you know who it's by? 49:31.565 --> 49:35.966 No, but the video game's famous for having a brilliant soundtrack in Japan and America. 49:35.986 --> 49:37.787 People are obsessed with it, with the songs. 49:38.327 --> 49:39.167 But I do recommend it. 49:39.207 --> 49:42.208 Man, we were supposed to have copies to give away today, but they haven't arrived yet. 49:42.248 --> 49:43.989 So hopefully next week, then I'll give you one. 49:44.269 --> 49:45.409 Oh, that'd be fantastic. 49:45.429 --> 49:46.489 Because you'll love it. 49:46.589 --> 49:48.730 Even people who don't like video games will like it. 49:49.250 --> 49:49.630 Excellent. 49:49.990 --> 49:50.871 Now, Diddy's in the dock. 49:50.931 --> 49:51.591 We should do it now. 49:51.631 --> 49:54.152 We should launch it very quickly and rattle through our choices. 49:55.252 --> 49:58.654 uh, because we've only got about 15 minutes left of our program. 49:58.674 --> 50:01.095 Well, this week's theme for Ditches in the Dock is falsetto songs. 50:01.135 --> 50:04.217 My choice is Beck with Deborah from the, what's the, what's the album? 50:04.277 --> 50:04.857 That green one. 50:04.877 --> 50:05.358 Midnight Vultures. 50:05.378 --> 50:06.238 Midnight Vultures, yeah. 50:06.318 --> 50:09.760 It's a sort of Princey type soul workout where he sings very high. 50:10.020 --> 50:11.541 It's one of my favourite Beck songs. 50:11.881 --> 50:13.302 So call 0871 2221049 and vote for Beck. 50:15.683 --> 50:44.602 and remember all five callers that get on the line will win the platinum edition of Bruce Lee's Fist of Fury that's two discs packed with four hours of bonus features it's certificate 18 uh and it's brilliant amazing kicking face kicking ass kicking nipple kiss kick kissing what but yeah Fist of Fury on DVD is up for grabs so call 0 8 7 1 triple 2 1 0 4 9 and vote for Beck with Deborah or can you give us a quick snatch of Deborah in the falsetto no come on 50:45.586 --> 50:45.875 Bye bye! 50:46.710 --> 50:47.170 Like that? 50:47.190 --> 50:47.951 Yeah, yeah, yeah, that's good. 50:48.391 --> 50:55.015 Mine, I want you to vote for David Bowie singing Without You from Let's Dance. 50:55.035 --> 50:56.777 Yeah, he does a lovely bit of falsetto. 50:57.037 --> 50:58.237 There's no smoke without fire. 50:58.298 --> 50:59.778 Oh, that is a good song. 51:00.079 --> 51:01.860 It's Bowie versus Beck, Battle of the Bees. 51:02.300 --> 51:03.241 So that's as simple as that. 51:03.701 --> 51:03.241 08712221049. 51:03.921 --> 51:09.044 And don't forget Fist of Fury special edition DVDs for everyone who gets through. 51:09.064 --> 51:09.044 08712221049. 51:09.165 --> 51:09.745 Please call now. 51:09.805 --> 51:10.165 Beck or Bowie. 51:16.429 --> 51:43.965 Love music, love XFM Love music, love XFM XFM 51:56.638 --> 51:58.240 Yeah, a little something for girls there. 51:58.361 --> 52:00.684 That's, uh, Jose Gonzalez. 52:00.724 --> 52:01.846 What a very sexist thing to say. 52:01.866 --> 52:02.787 With heartbeats. 52:03.248 --> 52:04.009 Very, very sexist. 52:04.029 --> 52:05.110 Sort of ladies out there. 52:05.391 --> 52:07.534 And just before we resolve, Dizzy's in the dark. 52:07.834 --> 52:10.238 I've got a small, boring announcement I'd like to make. 52:10.378 --> 52:10.839 Oh, God. 52:10.959 --> 52:11.079 Sorry. 52:12.060 --> 52:26.997 um my uh semi-regular evening of comedy and video hilarity is returning uh this is called the out of focus group and it is called the out of focus group yeah yeah it is and uh it takes place on uh wednesday february the 15th 52:28.198 --> 52:33.685 um, at the Zetter Hotel, Z-E-T-T-E-R, um, in Clerkenwell Road. 52:34.626 --> 52:38.470 Um, you can book a table if you'd like to eat while watching the hilarious comedy. 52:39.031 --> 52:44.777 And, uh, my guests that evening, apart from myself, I'll be performing and showing some of my amazing, amazing videos. 52:45.318 --> 52:48.582 Uh, but I've also very, very, um, oh, I can't speak. 52:49.102 --> 52:58.265 I'm- I'm also very happy that Laura Solon, last year's Perrier Award winner, is gonna be there and, uh, Dave Armand and Nick Tanner from The Hollow Men are coming along. 52:58.465 --> 52:59.406 It's gonna be an amazing evening. 52:59.466 --> 53:07.008 If you'd like to know more about it, uh, you can check out my website Adam-Buckston.com and the details will be on there. 53:07.088 --> 53:10.430 Oh, these- these people holding on the line for ditties might be angry with you. 53:10.530 --> 53:10.630 Yes. 53:11.610 --> 53:14.471 of the way, and now we can do it. 53:14.811 --> 53:21.213 And speaking of ditties, I'm sorry as well that we were playing the Ditties in the Dock music through some commercials there, I think. 53:21.533 --> 53:22.573 We've got to do this fast, man. 53:22.593 --> 53:25.714 This is going to be the fastest Ditties resolution in the history of radio. 53:25.994 --> 53:27.195 Okay, let's get onto it. 53:27.215 --> 53:28.175 So we've got five callers. 53:28.235 --> 53:28.795 Brian, hello. 53:28.815 --> 53:29.595 Hello. 53:29.615 --> 53:30.516 How are you doing? 53:31.056 --> 53:31.736 I'm doing very good. 53:31.756 --> 53:33.916 Are you excited about winning Vista Fiori? 53:34.457 --> 53:35.717 I'm ecstatic. 53:35.817 --> 53:36.277 Oh, brilliant. 53:36.317 --> 53:38.898 Listen, what are you voting for in our falsetto playoff? 53:39.355 --> 53:39.656 Beck! 53:40.637 --> 53:41.078 Good vote. 53:41.338 --> 53:41.819 It's very good. 53:41.879 --> 53:42.300 One for Beck. 53:42.320 --> 53:44.142 Brian, thank you very much indeed for calling in. 53:44.323 --> 53:45.304 Sorry we can't chat longer. 53:45.344 --> 53:46.165 Louisa, how are you doing? 53:46.826 --> 53:47.587 Hi, I'm good thanks. 53:47.627 --> 53:49.711 Tell us one really quick important thing about yourself. 53:50.803 --> 53:54.304 I'm wearing a pair of stupid jeans, trying to stretch into them, but they still don't fit. 53:54.444 --> 53:55.184 Oh, sexy! 53:56.745 --> 53:57.365 Thanks, Louisa. 53:57.645 --> 53:58.405 What are you voting for? 53:58.445 --> 53:59.346 Is it going to be Bec or Bowie? 53:59.786 --> 54:00.446 Bowie, please. 54:00.826 --> 54:01.046 Oh, yes. 54:01.066 --> 54:01.846 It's Bowie, it's 1-0. 54:01.866 --> 54:04.767 Good luck with the jeans, and we'll be sending you your fists off. 54:05.628 --> 54:07.168 Adam, thanks very much for holding. 54:07.188 --> 54:07.688 How are you doing? 54:08.068 --> 54:09.149 Yeah, not too bad, yeah, yeah. 54:09.349 --> 54:09.809 Yeah, good. 54:10.049 --> 54:12.790 Thanks, quick salient fact, Adam, very quickly, something impressive? 54:13.270 --> 54:15.971 I'm dead bored and at work, and I want to go out. 54:16.071 --> 54:16.671 What's your work? 54:17.501 --> 54:18.482 Oh, it's very dull, mate. 54:18.542 --> 54:19.822 I'm working in an office in Chingford. 54:20.123 --> 54:21.103 Oh, come on, that's not dull! 54:21.443 --> 54:22.124 Office, Chingford? 54:22.624 --> 54:23.805 Office, Chingford, Saturday afternoon. 54:23.825 --> 54:24.605 The possibilities are endless. 54:24.665 --> 54:27.647 Nice and cold, go and steal some... Yeah, it's actually quite warm in here. 54:27.807 --> 54:28.728 Steal some stationery. 54:28.908 --> 54:29.508 Yeah, exactly. 54:29.548 --> 54:32.470 Make a paperclip chain and hang it between your nipples. 54:32.490 --> 54:35.432 What are you voting for, Beck or Bowie? 54:35.852 --> 54:37.013 Beck, please, mate. 54:37.073 --> 54:38.814 That's two, one for Beck. 54:38.894 --> 54:40.095 Thanks very much for your call, Adam. 54:40.195 --> 54:40.655 James. 54:40.875 --> 54:41.155 James. 54:41.596 --> 54:41.916 Hello there. 54:42.116 --> 54:42.776 Hello, how are you doing? 54:43.057 --> 54:43.637 I'm very good, thanks. 54:43.737 --> 54:45.198 Headlines in James Weekly? 54:46.155 --> 54:49.539 A couple of nights ago someone set a loot and van on fire outside our house. 54:49.599 --> 54:50.581 Oh, a loot and van? 54:50.621 --> 54:50.941 Yeah. 54:51.062 --> 54:51.322 Really? 54:51.362 --> 54:52.023 Did you put it out? 54:52.644 --> 54:58.032 Well, there was a little fire next to it so we went out with a bucket and the firemen put out the other one. 54:58.052 --> 54:58.933 Do you live on a gypsy camp? 54:59.793 --> 55:00.453 Yeah, you got it. 55:00.473 --> 55:01.874 Where on earth do you live, James? 55:01.914 --> 55:02.735 I live in Finchley. 55:03.055 --> 55:03.755 Oh man, that's bad. 55:03.775 --> 55:05.716 That's not the sort of thing that should be happening in Finchley. 55:05.736 --> 55:05.956 I know! 55:05.996 --> 55:06.216 I know! 55:06.236 --> 55:06.657 Leave me Finchley! 55:06.717 --> 55:07.197 That's terrible. 55:07.217 --> 55:08.157 Did you summon the po-po? 55:08.558 --> 55:09.338 Yep, we did, yeah. 55:09.358 --> 55:10.138 Yeah, did they deal with it? 55:10.299 --> 55:10.479 Yeah. 55:10.719 --> 55:11.239 The po-po. 55:11.499 --> 55:11.799 Good one. 55:12.019 --> 55:12.780 That's outrageous. 55:12.800 --> 55:14.361 James, are you going to vote for Beck or Bowie? 55:14.461 --> 55:14.721 Bowie. 55:15.321 --> 55:15.681 Bowie. 55:15.841 --> 55:17.422 He sent it in the dock on fire. 55:17.502 --> 55:18.243 It's two-all. 55:18.363 --> 55:18.843 Nice joke. 55:18.883 --> 55:19.323 Thanks, man. 55:19.383 --> 55:20.124 You're on fire. 55:20.244 --> 55:20.424 Thanks. 55:20.444 --> 55:21.524 James, thanks a lot for your call. 55:21.544 --> 55:22.225 Kay, are you there? 55:22.425 --> 55:22.525 Yep. 55:23.471 --> 55:24.131 Oh, she's so efficient. 55:24.151 --> 55:24.832 She's business-like. 55:24.852 --> 55:26.513 Kate, you've really paired it. 55:26.713 --> 55:27.593 She's paired it right down. 55:27.653 --> 55:29.274 She's going to speak in monos, syllables. 55:29.714 --> 55:31.615 Anything exciting about your life today, Kate? 55:31.975 --> 55:33.676 No, I'm just upset because I can't go to the West Ham match. 55:34.196 --> 55:34.597 What? 55:34.617 --> 55:35.277 I wouldn't be worried. 55:35.297 --> 55:35.917 It's only football. 55:35.937 --> 55:36.498 It's boring. 55:36.518 --> 55:38.659 All the games are the same. 55:38.879 --> 55:39.779 But you're a lady. 55:39.819 --> 55:42.000 What are you doing being into the sport of kings? 55:42.341 --> 55:43.101 Extraordinary. 55:43.601 --> 55:45.162 What are you voting for, Kate? 55:45.182 --> 55:45.622 What's it going to be? 55:45.642 --> 55:46.523 This is the deciding vote. 55:46.543 --> 55:47.963 Leave us a little pause before you tell us. 55:48.023 --> 55:49.044 Is it going to be back or Bowie? 55:51.362 --> 55:51.522 Oh! 55:52.162 --> 55:53.103 Cornish wins, you see? 55:53.123 --> 55:56.003 The secret to winning this is just choose something very popular. 55:56.483 --> 55:57.103 Well, there you go. 55:57.263 --> 56:02.324 I'm going to give up on my Japanese video game music and just go for XFM playlist songs. 56:02.765 --> 56:04.165 Well, it's a fine song anyway. 56:04.225 --> 56:05.785 Kay, thank you very much indeed for your call. 56:05.825 --> 56:09.606 I'm very sorry about the whole missing the ball and the kicking and the goals. 56:10.166 --> 56:12.727 And thanks to everyone else who called in and texted this week. 56:13.627 --> 56:16.947 We really appreciate it, as ever, and we'll be back with you next week. 56:17.147 --> 56:17.948 Yeah, thanks for listening. 56:17.988 --> 56:18.628 Have a great week. 56:18.808 --> 56:20.028 Here is Beck with Deborah. 56:20.128 --> 56:20.924 We love you, bye! 56:55.742 --> 57:23.225 JCPenney I think your name tag I said Jennie I could stare at you With a fresh pack of gum And somehow I knew You were looking for something new Like a fruit That's right for the picking 57:31.698 --> 57:55.313 Cause only you got a thing That I just got to get with I just got to get, get with you And you know what we're gonna do I wanna get with you Oh girl And your sister I think her name is Dan 58:05.297 --> 58:15.201 Your sister, I think her name's Deborah. 58:15.241 --> 58:18.422 Girl, I only want to be there with you. 58:18.462 --> 58:20.143 Cause you got something that I just 58:43.308 --> 58:58.898 I said, lady Step inside my Hyundai I'm gonna take you up to Glendale Yeah I'm gonna take you for a real good meal Cause when our eyes did meet Girl, you know I was packing heat 59:10.690 --> 59:39.374 And wasting no time getting to know each other You know the deal, cause only you got a thing That I just got together, got together I just got together, got together, you, you I wanna give for you, only you, girl And your sister, I think her name is still 01:00:15.682 --> 01:00:18.111 Xfm's seven wonders