WEBVTT 00:00.409 --> 00:17.266 6 music later today boggins after boggins Mandy megaphone but now it's Adam and Jo 00:35.118 --> 00:39.682 There was a trail before that record that said, coming up soon, boggins. 00:40.142 --> 00:40.422 Yeah. 00:40.623 --> 00:46.308 And that's very overconfident for a trail, because we can't predict when that dog will come into the studio. 00:46.328 --> 00:50.492 I mean, how can the jingle be so confident that the dog will come in? 00:50.632 --> 00:52.293 I think later, they just said later. 00:52.313 --> 00:53.214 There wasn't a specific time. 00:53.274 --> 00:55.496 So it could be any time in the future. 00:55.516 --> 00:56.097 In the future. 00:56.117 --> 00:58.299 Is that how people use later? 00:58.519 --> 00:58.999 Yeah, sure. 00:59.239 --> 00:59.499 Yeah. 00:59.519 --> 01:01.520 That's how Jules Holland uses it. 01:01.640 --> 01:02.560 Jules Holland's later. 01:02.820 --> 01:03.720 Yeah. 01:04.400 --> 01:05.041 I'll be dead later. 01:05.281 --> 01:06.381 The world will get better later. 01:06.541 --> 01:06.861 Yeah. 01:07.001 --> 01:07.261 Yeah. 01:07.321 --> 01:07.941 I'll do it later. 01:07.981 --> 01:08.801 I'll do it later. 01:09.242 --> 01:10.462 That's my favorite expression. 01:10.482 --> 01:11.902 How are you doing, listeners? 01:11.942 --> 01:12.582 This is Adam. 01:12.722 --> 01:13.543 Hey, this is Joe. 01:13.603 --> 01:16.323 Thanks for listening, especially if you're listening live. 01:16.343 --> 01:20.964 And remember, if you are listening to these talkings live, then you're a member of Black Squadron. 01:21.384 --> 01:23.045 And we're going to have a command for you in a second. 01:23.385 --> 01:27.606 I might discuss the commands with Count Buckley's during the next record, just to make sure 01:28.246 --> 01:29.106 You know, we're on message. 01:29.307 --> 01:29.967 Yeah, absolutely. 01:29.987 --> 01:30.727 That's a good idea. 01:30.787 --> 01:33.789 Incidentally, you just heard the selector there with On My Radio. 01:34.389 --> 01:40.893 Before that, Yare played some dreadful noise by some young band near Varna. 01:41.913 --> 01:48.537 I mean, I don't think they're going to amount to much. 01:48.777 --> 01:49.357 They did. 01:49.657 --> 01:50.157 They did. 01:50.378 --> 01:52.819 They were one of the biggest bands of the 90s. 01:52.999 --> 01:53.259 The 90s. 01:55.220 --> 02:00.205 So what, what, imagine me saying that I don't know if they're gonna amount to match. 02:00.646 --> 02:01.687 Just started reading a mag. 02:02.788 --> 02:05.511 I started reading a mag in the middle of that sentence. 02:05.611 --> 02:07.052 While I was, while I get finished. 02:07.172 --> 02:10.095 Do you think my torso's good enough to appear in a Twilight film? 02:11.236 --> 02:12.337 Like to be a vampire? 02:12.517 --> 02:14.839 You haven't seen my torso for a while, but you think it's good enough? 02:14.859 --> 02:17.421 I mean, I think I could be a vampire in Twilight. 02:17.862 --> 02:19.503 No, I mean, do you care about my response? 02:20.264 --> 02:20.704 Not really. 02:20.744 --> 02:22.786 No, no, no, no. 02:23.346 --> 02:24.967 No, you're never gonna be in a Twilight film. 02:25.188 --> 02:25.808 Are you sure? 02:25.848 --> 02:27.229 Yeah, not unless it's by accident. 02:27.509 --> 02:28.510 What about as like an evil... 02:29.531 --> 02:30.812 Like more mature vampire. 02:31.293 --> 02:32.674 Right, yes. 02:32.854 --> 02:33.254 What about this? 02:35.076 --> 02:36.217 Well that was frightening. 02:36.357 --> 02:37.738 Listen, I wish you could have seen it. 02:37.798 --> 02:39.139 It did chill with the marrow. 02:40.641 --> 02:41.441 That's all you have to do. 02:41.582 --> 02:43.023 But that's one of the sexy young ones. 02:43.123 --> 02:44.424 What about the vampire's assistant? 02:44.464 --> 02:45.745 My children are obsessed by seeing that. 02:45.785 --> 02:46.706 Is that a comedy film? 02:47.707 --> 02:49.268 That's another series of books, I think. 02:49.468 --> 02:49.689 Is it? 02:49.909 --> 02:53.552 Yeah, that they've adapted to try and fill the void that's about to be left by Potter. 02:53.832 --> 02:55.613 What is it with vampires and zombies? 02:55.693 --> 02:56.514 I've had my fill. 02:56.854 --> 02:57.194 Have you? 02:57.294 --> 02:58.034 Yeah. 02:58.054 --> 02:59.095 We should talk about that later. 02:59.175 --> 02:59.575 Maybe. 02:59.875 --> 03:02.177 Well, that's fun to look forward to, listeners. 03:02.277 --> 03:02.577 Later. 03:02.797 --> 03:04.938 Also, later, with Jules Holland. 03:05.799 --> 03:10.241 We're going to have, like, text-to-nation and all our usual features. 03:10.261 --> 03:13.403 We're going to investigate the whole bog-in situation a little later on. 03:13.763 --> 03:16.645 But right now, here's Camera Obscura with the squee- the squee-test? 03:16.905 --> 03:17.906 The squee-test thing. 03:17.926 --> 03:19.647 Let's go! 03:22.319 --> 03:41.248 Always catch the beginning of the show Flack squadron don't wanna miss a thing That's not the one, black squadron roll Went to bed at a reasonable hour Gotta be sharp on Saturday morning That's the secret of the squadron's power 03:44.673 --> 03:52.017 Black Squadron is, of course, the elite listening force who listen to this programme live every Saturday morning, between nine and half past nine. 03:52.177 --> 03:52.798 Yeah, exactly. 03:53.238 --> 03:55.179 And we have a command for you this morning, Black Squadron. 03:55.199 --> 03:56.120 It's a photo command. 03:56.140 --> 04:00.202 We'd like you to stand by with your cameras and mobile phones as quickly as you possibly can. 04:00.222 --> 04:05.025 When the next record starts, you have to take a photo along the theme that we're about to announce. 04:05.045 --> 04:06.225 How many people responded last week? 04:06.245 --> 04:06.666 It was about 140. 04:06.706 --> 04:08.347 It was our highest number ever. 04:08.367 --> 04:08.987 Record response. 04:09.007 --> 04:09.267 Yeah. 04:09.527 --> 04:11.388 And have they all gone up on the website? 04:11.408 --> 04:11.949 I think they have. 04:12.709 --> 04:14.351 A toilet paper Egyptian mummy attack. 04:14.391 --> 04:15.632 It was a long-winded one last week. 04:16.533 --> 04:18.114 We had two or three alternatives. 04:18.154 --> 04:28.724 Adam and I were discussing them during that record, but our suggestions were superseded by a suggestion from a listener, Brigadier Young of Black Squadron, who's in his house awaiting his orders. 04:28.764 --> 04:31.146 He's made a brilliant suggestion that both Adam and I have seized upon. 04:31.166 --> 04:31.547 Are we ready? 04:31.927 --> 04:37.132 Yeah, we're going to fire off a free play as soon as Joe issues the command, and this is a track 04:37.552 --> 04:45.255 by Spoon, one of my favourite bands, and it's a track that, you know, the title is What I'm Lack Feeling. 04:46.236 --> 04:46.536 Okay. 04:47.656 --> 04:49.177 It's called Everything Hits at Once. 04:49.237 --> 04:50.917 I've had a week where, you know what I mean? 04:50.937 --> 04:52.738 Like, it never rains, but it pours. 04:53.098 --> 04:54.499 Oh, man, I'm sorry to hear that. 04:54.519 --> 04:55.939 You're clutching your elbow, as well. 04:56.119 --> 04:56.840 Elbone. 04:56.900 --> 04:57.920 I'll tell you about the elbow later. 04:57.940 --> 04:59.721 Let's have a big moan-in after this, after the command. 04:59.741 --> 05:01.402 I'm going to have a massive moan-in. 05:01.562 --> 05:02.122 I can't wait. 05:02.142 --> 05:04.763 Because I've had the week from the toilet. 05:05.263 --> 05:13.751 So, spoons, everything hits at once is gonna come up and James is sort of slow fade in so you might need to fire it off as Joe is issuing the command. 05:13.792 --> 05:14.512 Are you ready, Joe? 05:14.652 --> 05:15.934 Yeah, well, I don't know about that. 05:15.954 --> 05:18.716 We usually have a punchy record immediately after the command. 05:18.816 --> 05:22.680 If James gets it right, as soon as Joe starts issuing the command, it'll work. 05:22.820 --> 05:23.161 Will it? 05:23.321 --> 05:23.441 Yeah. 05:23.681 --> 05:32.649 Okay, this is the number to send your photos to by text 64046, or by email adamandjo.6music.bbc.uk. 05:33.130 --> 05:42.878 Text will be charged at your standard message rate, and remember, if you do send us a picture, particularly with this command, it will go possibly on our blog, so you have to be ready for that eventuality. 05:42.898 --> 05:43.459 Yeah, exactly. 05:43.779 --> 05:45.681 Stand by Black Squadron, here comes the command. 05:46.181 --> 05:46.722 In pants. 05:46.982 --> 05:47.603 In street. 05:47.823 --> 05:49.105 That is Camille. 05:49.405 --> 05:51.047 She is from France. 05:51.167 --> 05:52.448 I don't know nothing about her. 05:52.488 --> 05:53.710 What's the deal with her? 05:53.730 --> 05:57.094 She's a little fairy from France. 06:00.998 --> 06:03.379 And that song is called Tadula. 06:03.540 --> 06:05.061 That means you're pain. 06:06.021 --> 06:07.302 Is it Tadula? 06:07.342 --> 06:08.202 Is that your pain? 06:08.243 --> 06:09.583 Whose pain is it if it's Tadula? 06:09.603 --> 06:10.244 What's it called? 06:10.264 --> 06:12.505 T-A-Dula. 06:12.905 --> 06:14.406 I think Dula means pain. 06:15.427 --> 06:16.468 Something pain related. 06:17.188 --> 06:18.249 Anyway, that was Camille. 06:18.669 --> 06:19.930 She sounded very nice. 06:20.370 --> 06:22.052 She is very beautiful looking, look at that. 06:22.472 --> 06:27.157 And listen, Black Squadron, your response has been extraordinary to the command, a very challenging command this week. 06:27.257 --> 06:28.578 I mean, we're really pushing them. 06:28.718 --> 06:29.379 Pants in street? 06:29.539 --> 06:37.527 Yeah, because it's cold out there, you're wearing your pants, and you've got to go in public, you know that's really pushing the squadron, don't you think? 06:37.747 --> 06:38.508 Yeah, it really is. 06:39.188 --> 06:41.669 Um, are you excited about the results that are coming in Adam? 06:42.049 --> 06:42.249 Sure. 06:42.269 --> 06:51.732 We're getting some great pictures of people, uh, standing in the street, some good looking, very good looking men in their pants out there in the street with their arms folded, trying to keep warm by the bins. 06:52.632 --> 06:55.853 And, uh, but listen, man, listen, before we get into that, we'll come back to that. 06:55.873 --> 07:02.635 Cause they're still coming in and the squadron is still, uh, standing to attention, so to speak for another eight minutes. 07:03.475 --> 07:05.175 Um, but listen, you've had a terrible week. 07:05.195 --> 07:05.716 You were telling us. 07:05.756 --> 07:05.856 Yeah. 07:07.416 --> 07:09.398 Uh, L-Bone continues to be a problem. 07:09.918 --> 07:11.459 Went for an MRI this week. 07:12.300 --> 07:13.281 You know what an MRI is? 07:13.381 --> 07:15.382 Is that when you get into one of those big washing machines? 07:15.462 --> 07:16.623 That big washing machine. 07:16.643 --> 07:17.304 And it whizzes around. 07:17.484 --> 07:21.347 And usually, I assumed those were just for sort of brain things. 07:21.367 --> 07:22.568 Do they inject you with magnets? 07:23.570 --> 07:24.391 kind of thing. 07:25.152 --> 07:36.766 I mean, you are told before you go into the big washing machine that you can't have any metal on you whatsoever, because basically you're being passed through what is, as far as I can tell, a massive electromagnet. 07:37.086 --> 07:38.728 What about your adamantine bones? 07:39.970 --> 07:46.294 No, it's not a problem for me because I've been cured of all that stuff, of my Wolverine problems. 07:46.555 --> 07:50.037 But Wolverine absolutely would not be able to have an MRI. 07:50.197 --> 07:52.019 It would be like popping in my microwave. 07:52.139 --> 07:54.301 Yeah, it would rip out right through. 07:54.321 --> 07:57.423 They say like, have you ever had shards of metal in your eye? 07:57.903 --> 08:01.126 Because then you can't go into the machine because otherwise they wouldn't. 08:01.146 --> 08:02.387 The magnets will pull them out. 08:02.547 --> 08:03.548 Pull them right out. 08:04.088 --> 08:05.570 Aye yai yai, it's scary. 08:05.890 --> 08:08.513 And it makes this terrible noise when you go in there as well. 08:08.673 --> 08:10.776 Is that the thing that she does in the film The Exorcist? 08:11.036 --> 08:11.517 Yes, exactly. 08:11.557 --> 08:15.321 That's one of the most terrifying bits in The Exorcist when she goes and has all those scans. 08:15.361 --> 08:16.322 I think so, yeah. 08:16.382 --> 08:17.663 I guess they're more modern now. 08:17.704 --> 08:18.564 Those were big 70s machines. 08:18.585 --> 08:19.766 You would think so, wouldn't you? 08:20.066 --> 08:21.147 But they are still massive. 08:21.207 --> 08:28.533 I think that you can only get them so small because the physics of the thing is just about the amount of electricity they have to pass through these things. 08:28.573 --> 08:29.674 And that's what makes all the noise. 08:29.774 --> 08:31.875 Bang, bang, bang, bang, bang, bang, bang, bang, bang, bang. 08:32.316 --> 08:33.937 And they say like... Why does it go bang? 08:34.357 --> 08:36.079 Because it's the sound of the electricity. 08:36.119 --> 08:37.400 I said, why is it so noisy? 08:37.460 --> 08:39.281 Can't they like, you know, it's like the modern world. 08:39.321 --> 08:40.342 We've got iPods and stuff. 08:40.382 --> 08:41.863 Can't they make like a quieter version? 08:42.143 --> 08:43.925 And then I said, no, it's just that's physics. 08:44.345 --> 08:46.207 That's the noise that that amount of energy makes. 08:46.747 --> 08:47.968 It's never going to be quieter than that. 08:47.988 --> 08:50.689 A banging noise like a huge demon trying to get through the door. 08:50.729 --> 08:51.149 Honestly. 08:51.590 --> 08:54.411 And she goes, it's very loud, so I'm going to put some earplugs in. 08:55.032 --> 08:56.172 And by this time I was lying down. 08:56.192 --> 08:57.513 She's in her ears or yours? 08:57.673 --> 08:58.774 In my ears. 08:58.954 --> 09:03.236 I was lying down by this time in a very awkward position with my elbow in front of me lying face down on this thing. 09:03.256 --> 09:04.277 Incredibly uncomfortable. 09:04.617 --> 09:06.178 A little bit like Superman flying. 09:06.758 --> 09:10.300 Except if Superman was holding a chicken switch in his other hand. 09:10.660 --> 09:11.360 You get a chicken switch. 09:11.380 --> 09:12.901 You get a chicken switch if you can't handle it. 09:13.441 --> 09:14.982 What might you not be able to handle, the noise? 09:15.222 --> 09:19.823 The noise, the uncomfortableness, you have to lie absolutely still for half an hour. 09:19.943 --> 09:20.284 No. 09:20.384 --> 09:21.284 While this thing happens. 09:21.304 --> 09:21.924 Is there a telly? 09:22.284 --> 09:23.625 There's no telly radio. 09:23.825 --> 09:27.306 I think for children sometimes, depending on what position you're lying in, sometimes for children they give you a little telly. 09:27.326 --> 09:27.966 They should have some six music. 09:27.986 --> 09:29.267 That would be a perfect environment to listen to some children. 09:29.287 --> 09:29.827 Wouldn't be able to hear it. 09:29.847 --> 09:35.009 Bang, bang, bang, bang, bang, bang, bang, bang, bang, bang, bang, bang, bang, bang, bang, bang, bang, bang, bang, bang, bang, bang, bang, bang, bang, bang, bang, bang, bang, bang, bang, bang, bang, bang, bang, bang, bang, bang, bang, bang, bang, bang, bang, bang, bang, bang, bang, bang, bang, bang, bang 09:38.214 --> 09:41.800 It sounds like a kind of extreme hardcore German techno club. 09:42.261 --> 09:45.406 And even before you go in, there's a pump that operates the machine that goes... 09:49.777 --> 09:53.760 And I swear, I said to the nurse, like, is that music playing? 09:53.880 --> 09:55.442 Are they playing like techno music? 09:55.722 --> 09:57.003 She's the nurse, the sound of the pump. 09:57.744 --> 09:59.285 And she looked at me like, you idiot hole. 09:59.646 --> 10:02.008 Obviously, we're not playing techno music if we have an MRI. 10:02.368 --> 10:04.210 But that's what the whole experience was like. 10:09.815 --> 10:11.916 It was horrific. 10:12.156 --> 10:14.638 And then after a while you start to zone out, you know what I mean? 10:14.798 --> 10:17.500 And you become hypnotised by the grimness of it all. 10:17.740 --> 10:18.340 So, dude. 10:18.741 --> 10:19.441 How long have you got? 10:20.041 --> 10:23.243 I've got about, I would say, till the end of next month. 10:23.263 --> 10:23.784 Till later? 10:23.964 --> 10:24.764 Yeah, later. 10:24.784 --> 10:26.445 You're going to live till a bit later? 10:26.465 --> 10:27.486 With Jules Holland, yeah. 10:27.866 --> 10:31.408 And they didn't, all they could tell me at the end of it was you got swollen tendons. 10:32.169 --> 10:32.929 Don't know what that is. 10:33.530 --> 10:34.830 Someone mentioned arthritis. 10:35.811 --> 10:38.734 I mean, you don't want arthritis, for goodness sake. 10:39.034 --> 10:42.036 So I don't know, I haven't got like a definite thing yet. 10:42.317 --> 10:44.899 And then, to make matters worse, someone nicked my bike. 10:45.439 --> 10:46.120 Thanks very much. 10:46.420 --> 10:47.281 Get out your MRI. 10:47.321 --> 10:47.721 Same day. 10:47.881 --> 10:48.522 Bike nicked, yeah. 10:48.842 --> 10:49.202 Thanks. 10:49.563 --> 10:50.343 Thanks a lot for that. 10:50.423 --> 10:52.865 You sure it's not stuck to the side of the MRI machine? 10:53.606 --> 10:55.628 Have you been pulled in by the force of the magnets? 10:55.668 --> 10:56.208 Could be. 10:56.669 --> 10:57.950 I mean, I'd look on the bottom. 10:58.150 --> 10:58.891 Yeah, maybe. 10:59.631 --> 11:00.512 Man, that's terrible. 11:00.552 --> 11:01.152 That's awful. 11:01.172 --> 11:05.294 I mean, that feels like more than you would want for a link. 11:05.474 --> 11:09.396 I mean, that feels like you could do a whole five-minute ranting on the bike. 11:10.036 --> 11:11.037 Yeah, I could do, couldn't I? 11:11.057 --> 11:11.497 You could do. 11:11.637 --> 11:13.018 Why do we have that in hand? 11:13.798 --> 11:15.999 I've been thinking about the things that I would do to the guy. 11:16.039 --> 11:17.320 Should we stand down the squadron? 11:17.560 --> 11:25.604 We'll stand down the squadron then after the... Well, just before the news, we'll recap some of your extraordinary and some quite provocative photos. 11:26.725 --> 11:27.965 What did I say we were doing next? 11:28.786 --> 11:32.227 We're gonna stand down the squadron, but we can stand them down after we play a bit of Donovan, though. 11:32.247 --> 11:33.508 Here's Sunshine Superman. 11:37.150 --> 11:39.211 Stand down, your work is done. 11:39.231 --> 11:42.172 You've earned yourself a nice warm bath. 11:42.813 --> 11:44.653 And maybe a nice little bun. 11:47.912 --> 11:53.255 Black Squadron stood down and an excellent response to the in pants in street command. 11:53.475 --> 11:53.975 Very good. 11:54.155 --> 11:57.057 You can put your clothes back on and come back inside now, Black Squadron. 11:57.197 --> 12:01.459 That's a bit like I'm mad as hell and I'm not going to take it anymore from network. 12:01.499 --> 12:03.200 You know, if you looked down your street. 12:04.160 --> 12:09.283 and saw someone else standing outside their house in their pants, you'd know they were listening to the programme. 12:09.303 --> 12:12.966 And imagine what kind of panty moment there might be between you. 12:13.106 --> 12:13.886 Panty fine, right? 12:14.627 --> 12:21.271 If you suddenly saw a neighbour who... I mean, that's a good dating tactic, just for the first meet to be in pants. 12:22.091 --> 12:26.476 I've never... I've passed you so many times in the street, but see you now in your pants. 12:27.337 --> 12:28.639 I want to know more about you. 12:29.139 --> 12:30.681 Are you a vampire from Twilight? 12:32.243 --> 12:34.185 You will never be a vampire from Twilight. 12:34.745 --> 12:35.326 You're torso. 12:37.169 --> 12:37.930 It's back on. 12:38.250 --> 12:42.172 We're going to talk in more detail about some of those photos after the news, which is coming up right now. 12:42.493 --> 12:45.254 Zigger ziggo from Cuba Cuba. 12:46.715 --> 12:48.116 Say the title of that song then. 12:49.497 --> 12:50.018 I can't read it. 12:50.058 --> 12:50.358 Hang on. 12:50.398 --> 12:50.978 It's gone away. 12:51.298 --> 12:54.480 Inímer singer vitle singer. 12:54.580 --> 12:55.681 Oh, it's not too hard to say. 12:55.781 --> 12:57.222 Inímer singer vitle singer. 12:58.223 --> 13:01.385 It says here Icelandic for within mere lunatic things, but then it's crossed out. 13:01.465 --> 13:02.766 Is that because it's inaccurate? 13:04.288 --> 13:08.836 Maybe Sif, our Icelandic supermodel listener, couldn't text us. 13:09.196 --> 13:10.098 Tell us what that means. 13:10.218 --> 13:11.540 Do you think Sif still listens? 13:11.741 --> 13:12.482 Do you remember Sif? 13:12.602 --> 13:13.464 Sure I remember Sif. 13:13.524 --> 13:14.826 I think about it all the time. 13:16.767 --> 13:18.128 Maybe she can do a little translation for that. 13:18.188 --> 13:19.149 She's part of Model Squadron. 13:19.530 --> 13:19.930 She is. 13:20.691 --> 13:21.732 Speaking of the squadrons. 13:22.132 --> 13:27.557 Yeah, we had a very good response, as we've already said, to our Black Squadron command this morning, which was Pants Inn Street. 13:28.117 --> 13:30.680 That was the first Black Squadron command to be sent in by a listener. 13:30.720 --> 13:32.481 I think he just called himself Brigadier Young. 13:32.602 --> 13:32.862 Yeah. 13:33.342 --> 13:35.885 I'm not sure whether he's just a young Brigadier or whether Young is his name. 13:36.525 --> 13:52.310 Maybe he can clarify that, but we had an amazing photo from Black Squadron member number 23775, he calls himself, and he appears to be in Rio de Janeiro by a flight of those beautifully tiled steps that you get in that part of the world. 13:52.550 --> 13:56.711 You know those kind of towns that are on very steep hills and they're stepped. 13:57.271 --> 14:01.854 And then people have put beautiful sort of broken, shattered tiles and made collages along the steps. 14:01.934 --> 14:05.877 Lovely mosaics spelling out the words Rio de Janeiro there. 14:06.057 --> 14:07.298 It might be somewhere else. 14:07.838 --> 14:08.619 No, I'm pretty sure. 14:08.659 --> 14:11.641 I mean, it could be white leaves of basewater, I suppose. 14:11.721 --> 14:11.961 Yes. 14:12.021 --> 14:12.922 But I think it's unlikely. 14:12.962 --> 14:18.626 The people behind him look very authentically Brazilian and sort of sexy and they might be going to samba classes or something. 14:18.686 --> 14:23.269 And of course, it's a challenging command because not everyone wants to be seen in their pants, do they? 14:23.889 --> 14:26.992 We didn't get many responses from ladies, for instance, I noticed. 14:27.012 --> 14:29.394 There's a lot of quite proud, stupid-looking men. 14:29.514 --> 14:31.416 We got one from a lady who was very far away. 14:32.356 --> 14:34.298 Well, that's a good tactic. 14:34.438 --> 14:38.081 And the best one we got was from Hannah Waller, who is... Look at this. 14:38.121 --> 14:39.262 She's sitting in a chair. 14:40.183 --> 14:42.725 She's actually taking a chair out into the middle of the road. 14:42.765 --> 14:44.487 And she's reading a lady brain-rotting man. 14:45.047 --> 14:46.387 in her bra and panties. 14:46.887 --> 14:52.929 It's a good picture and that'll be going up on the blog unless you take some kind of legal action in the next half hour, Hannah. 14:52.969 --> 14:57.570 A lot of good looking torsos and some pleasingly out of shape ones as well. 14:57.690 --> 15:07.312 Yeah, some interesting tattoos have been revealed but we'll put the best of these photos, in fact we'll just put them all with a certain amount of editing for decency. 15:08.092 --> 15:09.913 and, you know, safety reasons. 15:10.354 --> 15:11.634 Some people are too sexy. 15:11.815 --> 15:12.715 Some people are too sexy. 15:12.735 --> 15:13.276 We don't want to quit there. 15:13.296 --> 15:14.056 We're a little bit too young. 15:14.436 --> 15:14.596 Yeah. 15:14.656 --> 15:20.240 So we'll just go for the ones that an adult brain can handle on the blog there. 15:20.260 --> 15:21.181 But thank you everybody. 15:21.221 --> 15:21.781 Look at that one. 15:21.801 --> 15:24.323 It's a guy that's dressed up in like an army helmet. 15:24.523 --> 15:24.723 See? 15:25.083 --> 15:26.704 Simon and Ginny in Glasgow. 15:27.465 --> 15:28.065 Amazing. 15:28.185 --> 15:31.688 He looks, I mean, he looks as if he needs to be locked up somewhere. 15:32.168 --> 15:42.976 But I like this idea of doing things in the street, and I think we should maybe grow that next week, or a way that if someone else in your street listens to the show live at 9am, you could identify them. 15:43.176 --> 15:47.139 That's right, you could poke your head out the window and see if anything crazy was going on in your street. 15:47.340 --> 15:49.862 And if it was, it's probably related to this show. 15:52.183 --> 15:53.003 Should we not do it then? 15:53.363 --> 15:53.963 I like it! 15:54.023 --> 15:56.404 I was only saying it like that as a fun thing to say. 15:56.844 --> 15:58.704 It doesn't make it something we shouldn't do. 15:58.724 --> 16:00.305 Okay. 16:00.525 --> 16:01.205 Because it's fun! 16:03.245 --> 16:06.146 Here's Big Audio Dynamite with E equals MC squared. 16:06.346 --> 16:07.566 Big Audio Dynamite there. 16:07.646 --> 16:12.927 Don't forget that Don Letts is part of the Six Music family and he's got a show this evening, I think, from 9-11. 16:15.668 --> 16:16.208 From 9-11? 16:17.408 --> 16:19.949 It started a long time ago, didn't it? 16:20.069 --> 16:20.569 Did it really 16:20.669 --> 16:41.984 started 9 11 yeah and it's been going on ever since well well that could just be September the 11th this year but that's not even greater it's got nothing to do with his show right it starts at 11 this evening how long does it go on James one minute one minute program one minute 11 that would be good so we should have one out what kind of stuff does he play there 16:43.730 --> 16:44.911 Just does that, like farts. 16:46.192 --> 16:48.854 The recordings, field recordings of chaffs. 16:49.855 --> 16:53.018 For a minute from around the world. 16:53.498 --> 16:55.280 Hi everyone, Don Letts here. 16:57.202 --> 16:59.924 I've got some great farts that I've recorded around the world. 17:00.285 --> 17:05.509 Here's one that Mick Jones passed me on that he recorded in Guatemala. 17:06.130 --> 17:07.471 What a fart. 17:09.537 --> 17:11.538 This is really insulting to Don Letts. 17:11.758 --> 17:12.678 Come on, he can take it. 17:12.838 --> 17:13.318 Can he though? 17:13.339 --> 17:13.939 He's a ledge. 17:14.139 --> 17:15.639 He's gonna come in here and lamp your face. 17:15.659 --> 17:16.220 He's a punk ledge. 17:16.500 --> 17:17.860 You know why I'm doing that? 17:18.160 --> 17:24.043 Because one time I went up to him in a club when he was DJing and I said, and I said, can I shake your hand? 17:24.103 --> 17:25.083 I did that thing, right? 17:25.283 --> 17:26.283 Can I shake your hand? 17:26.584 --> 17:32.286 Because I'd just been watching From Westway to the World documentary about The Clash that I think he directed. 17:33.166 --> 17:38.528 And I just thought it was amazing, and so I wanted to tell him so, in that way that you do sometimes, you don't want to pass on the love. 17:39.128 --> 17:40.768 He didn't give me any love back at all. 17:41.008 --> 17:42.289 What, he didn't let you shake his hand? 17:42.429 --> 17:44.329 He did, but it was very grudging. 17:44.450 --> 17:46.970 And he pretty much, he looked angry about it. 17:47.070 --> 17:48.911 Like, it's like, fair enough he was DJing. 17:49.131 --> 17:51.692 But I waited till he was, like, not doing anything. 17:51.732 --> 17:52.792 He wasn't segueing or anything. 17:52.812 --> 17:57.133 What kind of a six-music family is this, when one member of the family... Dysfunctional! 17:58.074 --> 17:58.374 Alright? 17:58.454 --> 18:00.534 ...abuses another member of the family life on end. 18:00.554 --> 18:02.015 So tune in to Don Letts's fart joke. 18:06.068 --> 18:07.670 I'm joking, Don Lez! 18:07.870 --> 18:08.872 He's a legend! 18:09.833 --> 18:15.799 He's... He helped us shape our culture. 18:16.400 --> 18:18.262 And of course it's not a fart show. 18:18.302 --> 18:21.206 It's a brilliant show and it starts at 11pm this evening. 18:21.826 --> 18:22.507 Oh my God. 18:23.828 --> 18:25.190 You should play a record. 18:25.210 --> 18:26.491 Hey, this is a free play. 18:26.511 --> 18:30.374 This is from the soundtrack of Fantastic Mr. Fox, which is wonderful. 18:30.394 --> 18:31.255 Are you going to go see that? 18:31.515 --> 18:31.755 Yeah. 18:32.035 --> 18:32.596 It's good, man. 18:32.636 --> 18:33.597 This is Burl Ives. 18:33.657 --> 18:35.798 He's an old guy from the past. 18:35.838 --> 18:37.099 This is called Buckeye Jim. 18:37.600 --> 18:39.241 He's got a lot of character. 18:40.302 --> 18:41.803 Maybe too much character. 18:41.923 --> 18:43.244 Andrew Bird, that was there. 18:43.364 --> 18:44.104 The Birdman. 18:44.224 --> 18:45.385 I like that song, that was very good. 18:45.405 --> 18:45.845 What was that from? 18:45.865 --> 18:47.847 From his album Armchair Apocrypha from 2007. 18:48.147 --> 18:50.388 That was called Heretics. 18:50.428 --> 18:54.370 He's a Chicago-based multi-instrumentalist, lyricist and whistler. 18:54.450 --> 18:55.151 He's very cool. 18:55.171 --> 18:57.852 He's got blue tinted shades. 18:58.033 --> 19:00.574 And he's playing a violin like a guitar. 19:00.594 --> 19:02.955 A couple of quirky features there. 19:02.975 --> 19:03.796 Oh, there he is, yeah. 19:03.836 --> 19:04.917 To excite quirk fans. 19:04.957 --> 19:06.437 He looks a little bit like Barry Gibb. 19:06.658 --> 19:07.518 He does, doesn't he? 19:07.538 --> 19:08.679 A young Barry Gibb, yeah. 19:10.082 --> 19:11.323 Scrawny and talented! 19:11.583 --> 19:14.423 It's time for Retro Text the Nation listeners, here's the Jingle Jungle. 19:15.104 --> 19:29.628 I like to listen to Adam and Joe But I listen to the podcast, not the live show I used to feel a cute frustration Because I couldn't join in with Text the Nation 19:30.308 --> 19:44.782 But now my troubles have disappeared Because retro takes the nations here And now my letter might be read out Instead of thrown in the bin and forgotten about 19:46.650 --> 19:53.113 So last week's text, the nation was, you know, forgive me for describing it this way, Count Buccullis, but it was a little bit nebulous. 19:53.333 --> 19:54.793 It was slightly unfocused. 19:55.494 --> 20:01.076 It was about kind of disastrous half term trips, family holiday trips. 20:01.176 --> 20:01.456 Yeah. 20:01.496 --> 20:06.178 That kind of thing like not some holiday trips was how I like the idea. 20:06.198 --> 20:06.959 That's a good idea. 20:06.999 --> 20:11.620 But I still can't get my head around how that criteria changes the nature of the stories. 20:12.201 --> 20:15.262 Like are there things that can only ever happen on half term? 20:15.562 --> 20:17.324 No, I mean it was desperate, it was absolutely desperate. 20:17.684 --> 20:20.206 But you know, our listeners came to our rescue as always. 20:20.226 --> 20:20.926 They really did. 20:20.946 --> 20:22.988 Here's an email we got from... 20:24.625 --> 20:25.666 I have to say this carefully. 20:25.966 --> 20:28.688 Shilts, the vibe man, look like something else. 20:29.028 --> 20:33.232 He says, when I was 11 years old, when I'd been on a half-term break to the Lake District. 20:33.592 --> 20:35.653 Oh yeah, you can make that sentence work for yourselves. 20:35.693 --> 20:36.434 I said it a bit wrong. 20:36.774 --> 20:44.180 While having our picnic, my brother spotted a chap filming the scenery and said that if someone fell over in front of him, he could earn £250 from You've Been Fraying. 20:44.200 --> 20:44.280 Hey! 20:47.222 --> 20:50.663 Have weird motivation, like why would you want to help the man earn that money? 20:50.683 --> 20:51.823 Maybe they're going to split it between them. 20:51.883 --> 20:52.183 I don't know. 20:52.483 --> 20:56.064 So I quickly got up, sprinted in front of him and tripped myself up. 20:56.445 --> 20:56.745 Nice. 20:57.205 --> 20:59.105 I got in serious amounts of pain. 20:59.825 --> 21:05.047 I fell in front of my parents, who looked at my shoulder, which they squirmed at, as it seemed to be protruding out of my skin. 21:05.707 --> 21:12.870 I was taken to a backwards doctor's out of a scene in Last of the Summer's Wine, where I waited for an x-ray doctor for two hours to tell me I'd broken my collarbone. 21:12.950 --> 21:13.471 Summer's Wine. 21:13.891 --> 21:19.273 I did, however, watch you've been framed avidly in the coming months to see if my escapades had earned anyone £250. 21:19.333 --> 21:20.053 It never appeared. 21:20.534 --> 21:23.255 Ah, that's weird, you know, I was doing that very thing last weekend. 21:23.275 --> 21:24.115 That's enterprising. 21:24.235 --> 21:25.356 Not popping out my collarbone. 21:25.916 --> 21:30.419 But me and the family watched You've Been Framed, which is a great show, let's face it. 21:30.859 --> 21:32.721 Last weekend, we all gathered round and watched it. 21:33.081 --> 21:35.803 First time that boys had seen it, it was an absolute smash. 21:35.823 --> 21:36.363 It's a smash. 21:36.623 --> 21:37.364 But would you do that? 21:37.444 --> 21:42.807 If you saw someone just idly camcording something, would you run in front of them and do a pratfall? 21:43.288 --> 21:45.109 No, not for their benefit. 21:45.129 --> 21:46.270 And then go up to them and go high. 21:46.870 --> 21:49.895 You might have noticed I just had a pratfall in front of your camera. 21:50.095 --> 21:55.644 You and I could split £250 each way if our video gets accepted by you've been framed. 21:55.704 --> 21:57.227 Why would you go into business with someone else? 21:57.247 --> 21:59.771 That's a good way for students and kids to earn money. 22:00.103 --> 22:02.064 Yeah, but me and Frank were doing it last weekend. 22:02.484 --> 22:02.984 Got any money? 22:03.745 --> 22:06.406 No, we never did it because we ended up flying a plane instead. 22:06.446 --> 22:07.686 I was trying to get him to fly a plane. 22:07.706 --> 22:08.307 Flying a plane? 22:08.327 --> 22:08.987 Like a model plane. 22:09.007 --> 22:09.727 Kind of a prank, is that? 22:09.747 --> 22:10.848 A model plane. 22:12.509 --> 22:12.809 Okay. 22:12.909 --> 22:14.009 Like an airliner. 22:14.469 --> 22:17.411 Click it and touch, but it's not catching speaking. 22:17.671 --> 22:18.891 False it into the ground. 22:18.911 --> 22:19.712 We'll get 250 quid. 22:19.732 --> 22:22.793 Kind of a sick joke, is that? 22:23.734 --> 22:24.474 You started it. 22:26.835 --> 22:28.036 You're gonna read one then? 22:28.176 --> 22:29.296 Yeah, right there. 22:29.817 --> 22:30.317 Here we go. 22:30.697 --> 22:32.298 You really flipped that round on me there. 22:32.738 --> 22:34.439 Well, it was just disturbing. 22:34.459 --> 22:35.600 The image was fun at first. 22:35.620 --> 22:36.760 Well, isn't that where you were going? 22:37.461 --> 22:37.961 I guess so. 22:38.081 --> 22:38.821 Yeah, exactly. 22:39.021 --> 22:39.582 You're sick. 22:40.722 --> 22:42.363 On half term... Who's this from? 22:42.403 --> 22:45.345 This is from Gil in Essex. 22:45.945 --> 22:49.287 On half term day trip I took with my... I'll start again. 22:49.727 --> 22:54.630 On a half term day trip I took with my family some years ago, we went to the zoo because I loved animals. 22:55.370 --> 22:56.331 loved in the past. 22:56.651 --> 22:56.851 Note. 23:15.166 --> 23:19.490 And I looked him straight in the eye, totally believing that we had bonded forever. 23:19.950 --> 23:22.573 It seemed to me that he was looking at me for ages. 23:23.133 --> 23:27.998 And then he turned very slowly and 180 degrees to face away from me. 23:28.318 --> 23:29.519 I was still transfixed. 23:29.739 --> 23:35.084 By now his rear end was facing me and he very deliberately lifted his tail and urinated all over me. 23:36.348 --> 23:39.151 I can tell you now that male lions have large bladders. 23:39.551 --> 23:41.033 I was so shocked I couldn't move. 23:41.333 --> 23:43.956 My brother, who was about 14, was hysterical with laughter. 23:44.277 --> 23:46.239 I was wearing a navy blue quilted jacket. 23:46.399 --> 23:47.420 It wasn't waterproof. 23:47.740 --> 23:49.742 My mother only had a small pack of tissues. 23:50.683 --> 23:52.766 That's the detail I really like. 23:53.106 --> 23:58.612 With which she tried to wipe me down and dry me off like a little pack of hankies. 24:00.462 --> 24:02.363 And that was the end of my birthday treat. 24:02.644 --> 24:06.467 My parents saw fit to curtail the outing after that and marched us all back to the car. 24:06.807 --> 24:12.312 Me, my smelly lion wee coat, and a 90-minute journey home. 24:12.612 --> 24:15.435 I've never been that keen on zoos since Gil from Essex. 24:15.475 --> 24:15.955 Thanks, Gil. 24:16.156 --> 24:16.936 That's epic, isn't it? 24:16.956 --> 24:18.378 Listen, we'll do one final one. 24:19.118 --> 24:22.882 This is the one, I think, Adam, that your subject deserved. 24:23.462 --> 24:25.103 This is from Andrew in Sheffield. 24:25.244 --> 24:28.226 That sounded meaner than it was meant to sound. 24:28.446 --> 24:29.587 Listen to this. 24:29.647 --> 24:30.988 Hello Adam and Jo. 24:31.289 --> 24:35.912 We went to the Doncaster Dome, which I guess is a smaller version of a biodome without the biosphere. 24:35.972 --> 24:36.833 It's a leisure centre. 24:37.534 --> 24:40.576 They did have a large swimming pool with some big curly slides. 24:40.897 --> 24:44.460 One of the slides was painted to look like a snake and called the Anaconda. 24:45.200 --> 24:48.262 After half an hour of splashing with my toddler, I decided to have a go. 24:48.862 --> 24:50.363 I climbed the stairs to the slide. 24:50.403 --> 24:51.444 They seemed to go on forever. 24:51.684 --> 24:53.926 When I reached the top, I was up in the roof of the dome. 24:54.326 --> 24:56.367 There was a man there with an eerie grin. 24:56.788 --> 24:58.028 He said, there you go, mate. 24:58.609 --> 24:59.629 And he was laughing. 24:59.890 --> 25:00.770 I was laughing too. 25:01.050 --> 25:03.232 I jumped onto the slide with boyish excitement. 25:03.852 --> 25:08.193 I pushed off, was immediately plunged into darkness and began to plummet at a terrific pace. 25:08.693 --> 25:11.034 My smiley face turned into an expression of concern. 25:11.454 --> 25:14.414 I began to fear for my safety as I buffeted through the darkness. 25:14.734 --> 25:18.055 I started to worry that I'd been tricked, that the slide was taking me straight to hell. 25:18.615 --> 25:19.976 I began to feel acute anxiety. 25:20.416 --> 25:22.436 Suddenly I was canoned out with an immense splash. 25:23.056 --> 25:26.597 On reuniting with my family, my wife said I'd turned white and called me stupid. 25:26.937 --> 25:29.818 My daughter thought I was a mega-dude, loves and hugs Andrew from Sheffield. 25:30.098 --> 25:31.378 So he just went down the slide. 25:34.264 --> 25:35.865 Because he got a bit frightened in the middle. 25:36.566 --> 25:38.447 But basically he just went down the slide. 25:38.587 --> 25:46.574 Because I think, myself, and a lot of the listeners, while you were telling that story, I was sort of expecting it to go somewhere else. 25:47.054 --> 25:48.455 No, he just came out the bottom. 25:48.575 --> 25:50.977 Like maybe he'd gone down the... Loves and hugs Andrew. 25:50.997 --> 25:55.661 The rubbish chute or something, or he'd been impaled by a spike at the bottom. 25:55.721 --> 25:57.322 No, no, it was just mildly frightening. 25:57.342 --> 25:58.182 He went down the slide. 25:58.202 --> 25:59.163 He went down the slide. 25:59.203 --> 26:00.664 But what's called the anaconda? 26:00.764 --> 26:01.085 Sure. 26:01.545 --> 26:03.587 There was a guy at the top and he said, there you go, mate. 26:04.187 --> 26:04.988 Went down the slide. 26:05.549 --> 26:06.350 Came out the other end. 26:06.370 --> 26:06.990 See what I mean now? 26:07.271 --> 26:08.232 Splish, splash, splosh. 26:09.493 --> 26:10.615 Good texternation. 26:10.955 --> 26:11.756 Thanks listeners. 26:12.116 --> 26:13.057 Hit some music right now. 26:13.077 --> 26:14.038 This is Elvis Costello. 26:31.324 --> 26:32.565 It's gonna be undone. 26:32.585 --> 26:43.272 Let's just show later on madness with one step beyond don't forget a little bit later in the show We'll be filling you in about what happened last Thursday at the BBC electric proms when Adam and I did a sort of a thing there It was good. 26:43.312 --> 26:44.373 We've done thing on the floor. 26:44.473 --> 26:53.879 We've done a thing people Thor it was wicked We'll be talking about it later on but right now I want to get something off my chest I was Arriving in London on the train the other day. 26:53.899 --> 26:59.803 It was raining outside and I was just about to get on my bike when I still had it and 27:01.244 --> 27:04.148 I saw a umbrella that had been left behind. 27:04.188 --> 27:04.709 An umbrella. 27:04.949 --> 27:05.470 An umbrella. 27:06.030 --> 27:06.751 Quite a nice one. 27:07.292 --> 27:07.412 Ooh. 27:07.773 --> 27:10.736 It was a sort of mini one, but it was medium sized. 27:10.756 --> 27:11.578 It wasn't too mini. 27:11.698 --> 27:12.338 Nice, nice, nice. 27:12.399 --> 27:13.820 It was nice wooden handle. 27:13.840 --> 27:14.061 Color. 27:14.701 --> 27:15.743 A nice black one. 27:16.003 --> 27:16.604 Wooden handle. 27:16.764 --> 27:18.125 Yeah, lovely wooden handle. 27:18.145 --> 27:18.445 Beautiful. 27:18.786 --> 27:23.689 One of those ones where you press the button and it pwangs out and erects over your head in a pleasing way. 27:23.749 --> 27:24.230 One of those. 27:24.450 --> 27:27.072 And then you press the button again and it shuts itself down. 27:27.092 --> 27:27.152 Yes. 27:27.172 --> 27:29.353 I mean, it's one of the best types of umbrella. 27:29.474 --> 27:30.975 So I was coveting the umbrella. 27:30.995 --> 27:34.197 I was pretty pleased that someone had left it behind because I thought, bongo, free umbrella. 27:35.498 --> 27:38.420 So, you know, I was the last one to get off the carriage as well. 27:38.460 --> 27:39.221 Everyone had gone. 27:39.581 --> 27:43.084 And so it was, it had absolutely be 100% been left behind. 27:43.804 --> 27:45.566 So scooped it up, shoveled it in my bag. 27:46.466 --> 27:49.009 as I am finishing, zipping up my bag. 27:49.109 --> 27:57.236 I know there's, I've got to point this out, but that's, I mean, you've smoothed over the point where other people might take it to the lost property office. 27:57.436 --> 27:58.337 Oh yes! 27:58.457 --> 27:59.678 I mean, there's that little map. 27:59.698 --> 28:00.259 I missed that there. 28:00.279 --> 28:01.260 Was that there at all? 28:01.560 --> 28:02.901 Yeah, there was that, there was that. 28:03.141 --> 28:03.722 But you know what? 28:03.822 --> 28:09.107 I just thought who actually goes and gets their umbrella back from the lost property office. 28:09.147 --> 28:09.447 Do you? 28:09.527 --> 28:10.368 Nice umbrella though. 28:10.888 --> 28:11.248 Wasn't it? 28:11.428 --> 28:13.210 Remember how he described it as being really nice? 28:13.290 --> 28:14.651 I did, and I set it up as being really nice. 28:14.671 --> 28:15.411 You were sort of coveting it. 28:15.791 --> 28:16.652 Coveting the umbrella. 28:16.672 --> 28:17.613 It's exactly the kind of umbrella. 28:17.633 --> 28:19.294 So why would the owner not covet it in the same way? 28:19.314 --> 28:20.234 Of course they would. 28:20.274 --> 28:22.996 Anyway, I don't mean to spoil the story with you, so... No, no. 28:23.236 --> 28:24.397 It's a very good point. 28:25.058 --> 28:26.378 It's a very good point. 28:26.418 --> 28:27.619 Anyway, so you steal the umbrella, Anne. 28:27.639 --> 28:28.460 But a damning insight. 28:28.480 --> 28:29.721 You steal the person's umbrella, Anne. 28:29.741 --> 28:31.142 Steal the guy's umbrella. 28:31.902 --> 28:32.402 So, yeah. 28:32.683 --> 28:34.484 And he immediately gets back on the train. 28:34.544 --> 28:34.804 Yes. 28:34.864 --> 28:38.206 Like an old guy, and he's clearly looking for the umbrella. 28:38.226 --> 28:40.468 So I say to him, oh, have you left your umbrella? 28:41.168 --> 28:44.952 And he said yes, I have I said yeah, I've got it right here. 28:44.973 --> 28:51.539 I was just about handed in Here you go Did he buy that? 28:53.281 --> 28:54.563 What sort of a look did he give you? 28:55.123 --> 29:04.789 Well, he was pleased to have the umbrella back, but I didn't stick around to scrutinise his face because I didn't even want to deal with the look of like, you're a liar, that he would have legitimately given me. 29:04.970 --> 29:08.032 Was there a look of sadness on your face when you gave him the umbrella? 29:08.652 --> 29:11.394 It was sort of panic at being so badly busted. 29:11.814 --> 29:14.956 And then also coming out with, I was just about to hand this in. 29:16.077 --> 29:18.138 There, where did you produce the umbrella from? 29:18.178 --> 29:21.541 My face started to shake with shame and bustedness at that point. 29:21.581 --> 29:22.641 Where did you put the umbrella? 29:22.962 --> 29:24.723 Right inside my zip-top bag. 29:26.805 --> 29:28.707 I'm just going to carry this to the lost property office. 29:28.727 --> 29:34.512 I put it in my bag, I zipped it up so it didn't fall out on the way to the lost property office where I was going to hand it in for you. 29:34.532 --> 29:39.737 You know, this ties quite neatly into the text the nation subject this week, doesn't it? 29:39.817 --> 29:40.578 Really, don't you think? 29:40.918 --> 29:41.759 Oh yes, I suppose so. 29:41.779 --> 29:43.321 We can talk about that a bit later. 29:43.461 --> 29:43.721 Yes. 29:43.881 --> 29:47.425 But I mean, I was thinking, you know, it all went off fine in the end. 29:47.965 --> 29:54.108 Uh, and the guy was pleased to have his umbrella back and I was pretty embarrassed about what I'd done, but still no, no bloodshed. 29:54.428 --> 30:03.173 But I was thinking like if that had been an episode of curb your enthusiasm, can you imagine that would have been the beginning of a lot of killing and shouting and stuff like that. 30:03.613 --> 30:05.154 W-w-what? 30:05.414 --> 30:06.956 You're not even gonna say thank you? 30:07.056 --> 30:08.457 I handed back your umbrella! 30:08.757 --> 30:10.278 You were gonna steal my umbrella! 30:10.758 --> 30:12.300 You had no intention of handing- What? 30:12.400 --> 30:13.460 I gave it back! 30:13.560 --> 30:14.441 What do you want? 30:14.861 --> 30:16.823 It's the- I'm gonna sue you! 30:17.123 --> 30:18.564 I'm gonna run you over in my car! 30:18.744 --> 30:19.024 What? 30:19.065 --> 30:20.566 You're gonna run me over in your car? 30:20.586 --> 30:22.207 Cause I gave you back your umbrella? 30:22.267 --> 30:23.528 What's going on here? 30:23.948 --> 30:25.829 I'm gonna hunt you down and kill your family! 30:26.030 --> 30:26.310 What? 30:26.940 --> 30:27.520 That kind of thing. 30:27.640 --> 30:29.081 I haven't watched that programme in years. 30:29.101 --> 30:29.761 That's what it's like. 30:30.182 --> 30:31.102 No, I feel I have. 30:32.723 --> 30:36.645 Free episode of Curb Your Enthusiasm there, brand new, exclusive to the Adam and Jo Show. 30:36.925 --> 30:39.406 Here's Julian Casablancas with 11th Dimension. 30:39.526 --> 30:42.628 He's getting two or three star reviews for that album. 30:42.848 --> 30:43.328 Is that good? 30:43.768 --> 30:44.308 No, that's not good. 30:44.328 --> 30:45.289 No, that's not good, is it? 30:45.349 --> 30:45.709 Middle of Road. 30:45.729 --> 30:46.790 That's below half the stars. 30:46.850 --> 30:47.250 Yeah, yeah. 30:47.290 --> 30:48.630 Do you think he'll be upset by that? 30:49.031 --> 30:50.231 I don't think he would care. 30:50.291 --> 30:51.652 I think he's devil may care. 30:51.812 --> 30:52.072 Yeah. 30:52.132 --> 30:55.676 Plus he's getting enough good reviews that he can stuff those under his pillow and fill. 30:55.716 --> 30:56.677 The work is the work. 30:56.737 --> 30:58.899 The public response is neither here nor there. 30:58.979 --> 30:59.780 I like that song though. 30:59.800 --> 31:01.262 That's a good single off there. 31:01.282 --> 31:02.863 I'm interested in hearing the rest of the album. 31:02.963 --> 31:06.387 Are you excited about Roland Emmerich's forthcoming film 2012? 31:07.948 --> 31:10.410 Oh, this is the disaster movie to end all disaster movies. 31:10.430 --> 31:17.215 They showed a big advert for it during the X Factor the other weekend, which I thought was a little bit traumatizing for children. 31:17.235 --> 31:19.117 It shows the world ending, basically. 31:19.737 --> 31:28.364 Tectonic plates splitting and tipping into the ocean, entire cities falling into the ocean, massive schisms opening up through densely populated urban environments. 31:28.484 --> 31:30.766 And even children running screaming from fireballs and stuff. 31:30.806 --> 31:33.147 Well, it's John Cusack trying to save his kids. 31:33.527 --> 31:37.810 He gets his wife and two kids in a plane and they're trying to take off, aren't they? 31:37.850 --> 31:40.352 And this crack is opening right behind the wheels. 31:40.792 --> 31:45.215 And then they're trying to fly through skyscrapers that are collapsing and falling into each other. 31:45.275 --> 31:46.276 I hate it when that happens. 31:46.296 --> 31:46.656 I hate it. 31:46.796 --> 31:49.158 So it makes it very difficult to get into work on time. 31:49.238 --> 31:49.498 Yeah. 31:49.958 --> 31:57.383 And there are constant cutaways of the two little kids who must be about 10 or 11 looking through the plane window having to react to this stuff. 31:57.623 --> 31:57.804 Yes. 31:58.624 --> 32:00.385 Tricky job for a director, don't you think? 32:00.605 --> 32:01.385 To make the children react. 32:01.405 --> 32:02.325 What's a director, child? 32:02.726 --> 32:06.307 All right, Samuel, you are looking out of the window of the plane. 32:06.367 --> 32:07.207 This is Mr. Emery. 32:07.267 --> 32:07.527 Yes. 32:08.428 --> 32:09.488 Is this a good accent? 32:09.508 --> 32:10.108 Very good. 32:10.208 --> 32:10.828 He's German. 32:11.088 --> 32:13.269 He's German and he's lightly cast. 32:13.469 --> 32:14.490 Yes, he is. 32:14.750 --> 32:15.990 Have you not seen his films? 32:16.390 --> 32:16.991 No. 32:17.411 --> 32:20.852 And you look out of the window and severe all this hunting. 32:22.381 --> 32:23.102 Okay, action! 32:24.102 --> 32:25.803 How would you, how would you do that face? 32:25.864 --> 32:27.625 I mean, this is radio, so it's not a good question. 32:27.725 --> 32:28.105 Yeah. 32:28.545 --> 32:30.727 I mean, the kid, the kid... If the virld was ending. 32:31.027 --> 32:31.708 The virld. 32:32.488 --> 32:32.989 The virld. 32:33.029 --> 32:33.529 The virld. 32:34.029 --> 32:36.972 The kid kind of goes blank, which is the way to do it, really. 32:36.992 --> 32:37.092 Sure. 32:37.112 --> 32:40.214 I mean, you can't do a big, like, rubbery expression, can you? 32:40.234 --> 32:40.734 Less is more, no. 32:40.774 --> 32:41.695 Less is more, yeah. 32:42.295 --> 32:48.680 But, well, I wonder if you did any of that stuff that Spielberg used to do, like, tricking them into reacting in certain ways. 32:48.700 --> 32:48.860 Right. 32:48.880 --> 32:49.140 Right. 32:49.340 --> 32:51.142 By showing them dead cats and stuff. 32:53.254 --> 32:56.135 He bought a cat that looked exactly like the child's cat. 32:56.155 --> 32:58.976 Like, didn't Spielberg on Close Encounters say something like that? 32:58.996 --> 33:00.337 Well, he would dress up as a clown. 33:00.477 --> 33:06.059 That was famously what he did when the little boy was reacting to the spaceships outside the window and he says, toys! 33:07.099 --> 33:10.601 But didn't he want to do something a little bit dodge-like, say, someone's auntie had died? 33:10.621 --> 33:16.723 Dustin Hoffman famously on Kramer vs. Kramer made the little boy cry by telling him he hated him. 33:17.163 --> 33:41.890 oh right yeah made really close friends for him for half of the production then and then got angry with him said he was rubbish and not doing a good job he got that amazing oscar winning crying scene but the whole point of this is that trailer for 2012 has made a deep traumatic impression on my tiny brain a deep impact yeah and i'm like a man type of a thing and if you were a child who can imagine the psychological effect it would have i had a 2012 dream 33:43.490 --> 33:44.311 A blockbuster dream. 33:44.331 --> 33:49.556 Do you ever have blockbuster dreams where suddenly the production values in your dreams skyrocket? 33:49.656 --> 33:51.077 You're lucky, I have kitchen sink dreams. 33:51.097 --> 33:51.417 To you? 33:51.818 --> 33:53.760 I had a 2012 dream and I was literally in 2012. 33:54.140 --> 33:54.761 Wow. 33:55.301 --> 33:57.623 I was in a room and the world was ending. 33:57.643 --> 33:58.264 Is it in 3D? 33:58.884 --> 33:59.825 It wasn't, unfortunately. 33:59.845 --> 34:00.726 But then 2012 isn't in 3D, I don't think. 34:02.888 --> 34:23.690 the world was ending outside the window and I was freaking out because the world was ending I was panicking and didn't know what to do so in the dream I thought oh video it quickly video it I grabbed a video camera and started videoing these amazing effects that were happening outside the window 250 quid for it then someone came up in the dream and put their hand on my shoulder and said sorry mate that's piracy you can't do that 34:26.112 --> 34:27.393 That's pretty meta, don't you think? 34:27.433 --> 34:28.213 That really is. 34:28.433 --> 34:33.476 The other thing that freaks me out about that film is the BBFC box in it, right? 34:33.496 --> 34:41.340 It's got all this spectacular destruction in the world ending and the BBFC certification box says, contains sustained moderate threat. 34:42.000 --> 34:43.562 and one use of strong language. 34:43.602 --> 34:44.162 Moderate threat. 34:44.182 --> 34:47.025 Did they not use the word peril anymore? 34:47.145 --> 34:47.385 No. 34:47.606 --> 34:58.396 Moderate threat, the entire world ending, being sucked into a huge chasm while you desperately try to escape with your family, while a crevasse opens up inches from the wheels of your plane. 34:58.977 --> 34:59.898 Moderate threat. 35:00.078 --> 35:01.539 In the hands of Emmerich maybe it is. 35:01.559 --> 35:05.283 Flying sideways through two collapsing skyscrapers, just making it. 35:06.715 --> 35:08.016 What are the BBFC doing? 35:08.496 --> 35:12.618 They're giving away plot points, and they're actually reducing the dramatic impact of films. 35:12.858 --> 35:14.999 They're not giving away too many plot points there though, are they? 35:15.560 --> 35:15.980 Moderate. 35:16.000 --> 35:17.040 The threat. 35:17.080 --> 35:18.341 One use of strong language. 35:18.521 --> 35:18.781 Yeah. 35:19.041 --> 35:20.022 Any full frontal nudity? 35:20.482 --> 35:20.722 No. 35:21.283 --> 35:23.244 Brief, shocking full frontal nudity. 35:23.424 --> 35:25.345 That's my favorite BBFC, right? 35:26.426 --> 35:29.429 Or prolonged, shocking, full-front immunity. 35:29.910 --> 35:32.292 I know, I don't like those films, you know, because they are depressing. 35:32.693 --> 35:34.014 I don't like to think about the world ending. 35:34.054 --> 35:34.795 It's not fun for me. 35:35.015 --> 35:36.717 Like I saw Drag Me to Hell the other day. 35:37.418 --> 35:38.619 And that's sad as well. 35:41.232 --> 35:41.632 It does. 35:41.712 --> 35:42.753 Yeah, it's got a sad ending. 35:42.773 --> 35:44.535 It's got a very sad ending. 35:46.216 --> 35:47.477 I wasn't prepared for it. 35:47.917 --> 35:49.419 Here's a free play for you right now, listeners. 35:49.699 --> 35:50.780 Now, how do you feel about this, Joe? 35:50.800 --> 35:52.261 I'm going to play a bit of classical music. 35:53.462 --> 35:54.603 Uncomfortable, unnerved. 35:54.623 --> 35:55.343 Are you unnerved? 35:55.384 --> 35:55.624 Yeah. 35:55.644 --> 35:58.266 And this isn't even from like a soundtrack or anything like that. 35:58.786 --> 35:59.687 This just popped up. 35:59.707 --> 36:03.290 What I did is I was loading some classical music onto my father-in-law's iPod. 36:03.490 --> 36:06.513 I think this is your Chilean, your Spanish blood. 36:06.674 --> 36:06.994 Maybe. 36:07.094 --> 36:09.096 Your mum's side of the family coming through here. 36:09.316 --> 36:15.003 So when I was loading this stuff for my father-in-law, I made a copy of some of it for myself as well, because I thought, you know, nice. 36:15.523 --> 36:18.807 Spread the net musically, listen to some stuff you wouldn't normally listen to. 36:19.307 --> 36:22.729 So this popped up on my iPod the other day when I was cycling, and I really enjoyed it. 36:22.749 --> 36:23.869 I thought, I'm going to play this on the show. 36:24.109 --> 36:30.793 But then I thought, maybe this is actually going to repel listeners because it's too, you know, it's got nothing to do with six musics remit. 36:31.193 --> 36:31.973 Is it a problem? 36:32.233 --> 36:34.214 Anyway, it's very short, and I hope you enjoy it. 36:34.274 --> 36:35.635 This is Fernando Sore. 36:35.675 --> 36:38.116 He's an 18th century composer, Spanish composer. 36:38.156 --> 36:39.016 Oh my God. 36:39.217 --> 36:39.517 Yeah. 36:39.877 --> 36:43.258 And this is six from his Six Valsas. 36:45.480 --> 36:47.020 I don't know much else about it. 36:47.440 --> 36:48.141 How long was it now? 36:48.801 --> 36:49.842 It's ten and a half minutes. 36:50.002 --> 36:50.763 No, it's two minutes. 36:50.843 --> 36:51.344 It's gonna be good. 36:51.464 --> 36:52.024 Hope you enjoy. 36:52.084 --> 36:52.425 Hit it. 36:52.445 --> 36:55.908 I mean, we talked over that, we slightly ruined it, but that was good though, didn't you think? 36:56.028 --> 36:56.889 Yeah, that was good. 36:57.309 --> 36:59.732 That was, who was there playing on that? 37:00.572 --> 37:02.915 It was Wilma Van Berkel. 37:03.695 --> 37:04.616 Ah, Van Berkel. 37:04.776 --> 37:05.977 Robert Kubica. 37:06.198 --> 37:11.623 They were playing the guitar on that track, which was by the Spanish composer Fernando Sore. 37:12.003 --> 37:12.424 S-O-R. 37:13.359 --> 37:13.999 Enjoyable, right? 37:14.080 --> 37:15.120 Yeah, yeah, enjoyable. 37:15.340 --> 37:17.602 I mean, that's not gonna be a problem for six music listeners. 37:17.622 --> 37:18.923 They're very broad-minded. 37:18.943 --> 37:21.084 They've got a very Catholic taste. 37:22.505 --> 37:23.646 I think that was a big success. 37:24.167 --> 37:25.888 I'm gonna play a lot more of that kind of song. 37:25.908 --> 37:30.111 I'm gonna check the texts and the emails to see what the listener's response is to that direction. 37:30.291 --> 37:30.571 Yeah. 37:30.771 --> 37:31.492 No, it's nice, man. 37:31.972 --> 37:36.855 You know, I'm not suggesting we turn the whole thing into Radio 3 or whatever, but a little bit. 37:36.955 --> 37:37.315 Nice. 37:37.475 --> 37:38.175 Mix it all up. 37:38.235 --> 37:38.475 Nice. 37:38.956 --> 37:39.356 Nice. 37:39.616 --> 37:39.856 Nice. 37:39.876 --> 37:41.677 And then you can rap over it and stuff, maybe. 37:42.097 --> 37:42.918 Here's a bit of Blondie. 37:42.958 --> 37:43.618 This is Atomic. 37:43.878 --> 37:45.639 That's Blondie and Atomic. 37:45.659 --> 37:47.380 This is Adam and Joe here on BBC Six Music. 37:47.400 --> 37:49.941 We're going to get into this week's Text the Nation. 37:50.161 --> 37:55.104 But before we do, here's a jingle that I've collaborated with a listener to create. 37:55.564 --> 37:59.086 This was sent in, the backing track was sent in by Neil in Kingston. 37:59.126 --> 38:01.227 He's done a little bit of guitar playing here. 38:01.727 --> 38:08.753 in a Bob Dylan's Come Buffalo Bill style he says that he thought we might enjoy this so here's what I've come up with Neil 38:12.440 --> 38:21.229 Text the nation, ooh, text the nation about the subject that they specified on the radio program. 38:21.269 --> 38:23.852 You've got it, text the nation now. 38:24.012 --> 38:30.259 Woo hoo, doggy, what if I'm using an email instead of texting, is that a problem? 38:30.360 --> 38:30.600 No! 38:34.231 --> 38:36.093 Sort of quasi Bob Dylan there. 38:36.193 --> 38:36.713 Good work. 38:37.073 --> 38:41.917 Thanks very much Neil and Kingston for that So this week, what is our subject? 38:42.097 --> 38:47.261 Well, I was cycling in this morning and when you cycling very early on a sester in London The roads are very empty. 38:47.441 --> 38:57.488 Yeah, and I cycled past a shop and on the pavement outside the shop was a giant letter e Oh a lowercase letter e where did had it come from? 38:57.508 --> 38:57.548 Oh 38:57.828 --> 39:03.995 Well, I think they were redoing the front of the shop, but they'd probably gone off for brekkie or a bacon butty. 39:04.835 --> 39:08.059 And they'd left this E just lying in the middle of the street. 39:08.319 --> 39:11.622 And this is why it ties into your umbrella thing you were talking about earlier. 39:12.043 --> 39:17.989 Because when you see something just in the street, it's hard to resist the sense that it's public property. 39:18.209 --> 39:18.930 Sure, no one wants it. 39:18.950 --> 39:24.474 Because it's obstructing this letter E like a sort of Sesame Street letter, just lying there. 39:24.494 --> 39:25.415 It was very big. 39:25.835 --> 39:27.597 It was about three or four foot wide. 39:27.877 --> 39:29.238 It was a nice E. What colour? 39:29.398 --> 39:29.979 It was white. 39:30.659 --> 39:31.300 Very solid. 39:31.600 --> 39:32.341 Yeah. 39:32.601 --> 39:33.121 And I thought, 39:33.982 --> 39:38.709 I mean, I could just have that E. I could pop that E and take it home. 39:39.590 --> 39:40.171 But I didn't. 39:40.211 --> 39:42.694 I resisted it because I knew they'd miss it when they came back. 39:42.975 --> 39:48.442 But it started me thinking about stuff you see in the street that you just decide to sort of take. 39:48.723 --> 39:49.624 Yeah, no one wants that. 39:49.904 --> 39:55.648 If something's in the street then it's pretty, is it accepted that it's pretty much anybody's game? 39:55.768 --> 39:58.290 Well you do feel like that when you're a teen especially. 39:58.370 --> 40:07.917 We've discussed this on shop floors, we've discussed before that if a product falls onto the floor of a shop and stays there for a while, some of our listeners in the past have thought that it's then public property. 40:08.297 --> 40:10.560 But in the street, that's even more exaggerated, isn't it? 40:10.720 --> 40:13.202 Yeah, I mean, of course it should be said. 40:13.222 --> 40:16.206 Right at the very top of this text of the nation, that's not the case. 40:16.226 --> 40:19.950 It's going to be council property, probably. 40:20.270 --> 40:22.532 You know, things like road cone, street furniture. 40:22.552 --> 40:26.837 But if someone's left it in the street, it suggests that they don't care about it that much, doesn't it? 40:26.917 --> 40:27.718 I agree with you. 40:28.198 --> 40:31.260 It's like everyone's snaffled at Roadco, haven't they? 40:31.420 --> 40:33.441 Especially in your student days. 40:33.881 --> 40:37.623 I mean, it's a bad thing to do and I remember getting very badly busted for that. 40:37.663 --> 40:39.524 It's fun to have a road sign in your room. 40:39.544 --> 40:40.305 Of course it is. 40:40.345 --> 40:40.885 Don't you think? 40:40.905 --> 40:46.948 Because you're kind of repurposing that stuff a little bit like an American pop artist might. 40:47.089 --> 40:48.089 So this is confessional. 40:48.129 --> 40:55.033 We're not encouraging this kind of behavior or condoning it in any way, but we'd like to know what things you have appropriated from the street. 40:55.713 --> 40:59.135 a bit of civil property sharing, that kind of thing. 40:59.235 --> 41:00.836 The text number is 64046. 41:00.916 --> 41:04.477 The email is adamandjo.6musicatbbc.co.uk. 41:04.557 --> 41:10.220 I mean, we had a terrible... We went through a quite prolonged phase of doing this kind of thing. 41:10.460 --> 41:12.341 Maybe we'll talk about it later on in the show. 41:12.901 --> 41:16.383 We got some confessing to do, and not all of it's legal confessing. 41:16.603 --> 41:17.164 You dig? 41:17.184 --> 41:18.924 6 Music, it's 10.30. 41:18.984 --> 41:20.065 Time for the news. 41:20.365 --> 41:43.876 that's the eels very enjoyable stuff there from his album ombre lobo ombre yeah that's right uh that's called the look you give that guy adam and joe here on bbc6 music a lot of listeners are quite angry about my sniggering during your uh classical guitar piece uh it was very popular it went down very well that's good i might dig out some more also i got chastised for mentioning that i was listening to my headphones when i finished excusing my chest 41:44.116 --> 41:46.838 I was just going to say I wasn't laughing at the music. 41:46.898 --> 41:47.499 It was beautiful. 41:47.539 --> 41:51.382 I was laughing at your face and just the idea of you playing it. 41:51.562 --> 41:52.123 Oh, I see. 41:52.163 --> 41:54.144 Yeah, that's all right. 41:54.164 --> 41:55.846 No, you wouldn't laugh at guitar virtuosity. 41:55.866 --> 41:56.526 What would be the point? 41:56.987 --> 41:57.447 Who could? 41:57.627 --> 41:58.047 Who could? 41:58.067 --> 42:02.891 Yeah, I was told off for mentioning that I was listening to that piece of music on my bike. 42:02.931 --> 42:05.934 Of course, it's very dangerous and children should never be encouraged to 42:06.634 --> 42:27.288 listened to anything on their bikes other than the traffic around them and policemen shouting at them and youths shouting and rapping in the street and flowers being sold, chimney sweeps humming, the sound of music. 42:27.848 --> 42:28.869 What are you doing there? 42:28.889 --> 42:29.589 I don't know. 42:30.209 --> 42:30.809 Just help me. 42:30.849 --> 42:32.010 I was hoping you'd help me. 42:32.150 --> 42:34.851 I thought you were, I was just reading some text the nations. 42:34.871 --> 42:36.932 I thought you were saying something sensible. 42:36.952 --> 42:38.233 My brain is shutting down. 42:38.333 --> 42:40.394 Should we do, oh no, we're going to talk about the electric proms now. 42:40.414 --> 42:41.134 Yeah, absolutely. 42:41.154 --> 42:42.255 Okay, podcast edit point. 42:43.175 --> 42:54.787 So, listeners, last Thursday we did a show at the BBC Electric Proms, which is an amazing kind of explosion of live music events that happens in the roundhouse in London's Camden Town. 42:55.387 --> 43:01.113 And we acquired the top slot, the best slot, noon on a Thursday. 43:01.793 --> 43:04.516 And the best venue, it was actually quite a nice venue, wasn't it? 43:04.556 --> 43:19.389 It was a sort of little seated room with a stage and a hundred fans came along, a few thousand people applied for tickets, but a hundred, I say fans, you know, supporters, helpers came along, sympathetic humans came along. 43:19.850 --> 43:26.556 And we did a kind of hour of messing around, the highlight of which were the two performances by our winners of our Song Wars karaoke competition. 43:27.356 --> 43:34.804 Fish and Chips, Dish and Trips, Dids and Trish, Dids and Trish from Cornwall who did a brilliant version of your song of Nutty Room. 43:34.844 --> 43:38.148 Lovely close harmony version of Nutty Room over the backing track. 43:38.569 --> 43:46.257 And a young man called Ben Mercer who did an amazing cover of Sontum of Qualys and then I had been sort of 43:47.418 --> 44:14.060 forced into singing Doctor Sexy so I sung Doctor Sexy and I wanted to sing it to someone who had sexy disease and I turned to the audience and said who here has sexy disease expecting everyone to be fighting to get to the stage and no one seemed to have sexy disease at all so we had to force Ben Mercer only because he had tight jeans which is one of the symptoms to come and I did an erotically charged 44:14.720 --> 44:16.361 version of Dr. Sexy. 44:16.821 --> 44:21.204 There were certain things that happened, though, that are available to see on a video, on our blog. 44:21.244 --> 44:31.149 If you go to the Adam and Jo blog, you can check out a kind of 12-minute highlights package, including a montage of the submissions we got for the competition and those three performances. 44:31.589 --> 44:37.212 But there were some things that happened on that day that no one other than the 80 people that were in that room will ever know about. 44:37.432 --> 44:43.295 Special things special things that only they will ever experience secret things a secret song Adam's son. 44:43.415 --> 45:04.126 Yeah some experimental segments But right now we're gonna play you a little clip package of just some of the highlights from that day Ladies and gentlemen hello and welcome to Adam and Joe's song wars at the electric proms and 45:06.175 --> 45:10.638 Before we introduce you to the winners today, we're going to just play a little compilation. 45:10.658 --> 45:12.279 Shout out if you see yourself. 45:28.370 --> 45:29.511 Actually having to do it now. 45:29.752 --> 45:30.172 Exactly. 45:30.412 --> 45:31.534 Couldn't that just be awful? 45:31.694 --> 45:33.556 Someone, however, does have to do it. 45:33.856 --> 45:38.001 Our two winners, we had, uh, Dids and Trish, who are going to sing my Nutty Room song. 45:38.362 --> 45:41.485 And there's Ben Marcer, who's going to sing my Sontum of Qualys song. 45:41.505 --> 45:43.748 Welcome to... Stupid... Question time. 45:46.149 --> 45:46.549 Becky. 45:46.769 --> 45:47.089 Stroke. 45:47.270 --> 45:47.570 Grace. 45:47.590 --> 45:48.430 Here we go. 45:48.470 --> 45:49.490 Wow, he's gonna go to them. 45:50.310 --> 45:51.411 How you doing, ladies? 45:51.631 --> 45:56.352 Adam, do what Russell Brandon does on Big Brother's Little Brother and sit, like, on them. 45:56.672 --> 45:57.053 Right. 45:57.453 --> 45:58.933 That's the trendy thing to do. 45:59.193 --> 45:59.894 I'm not. 46:00.094 --> 46:01.834 I'm... Just get really... That's what all presenters do. 46:01.874 --> 46:02.914 Get really physically close. 46:03.015 --> 46:03.455 Invade. 46:03.595 --> 46:03.915 It's true. 46:03.935 --> 46:05.355 I'm gonna be a bit invasive now, right? 46:05.375 --> 46:07.196 I'm just gonna touch your inner thigh. 46:09.038 --> 46:11.240 It just seems a bit uptight. 46:11.281 --> 46:12.983 When Russell does it, it's more relaxed. 46:13.003 --> 46:14.685 It's still a bit too middle class for this. 46:15.446 --> 46:20.352 I'm just going to pat you on the shoulder there and maybe shake hands. 46:20.412 --> 46:21.013 Jolly good. 46:21.333 --> 46:23.056 Now, could you read out your question for us, please? 46:23.618 --> 46:25.699 What is she going to look like with the chimney on her? 46:25.899 --> 46:31.461 I mean, the literal answer, of course, is that she's going to look dreadful because she will be dead. 46:31.681 --> 46:34.763 Please give a big, warm welcome to Ben Mercer. 46:34.943 --> 46:38.024 Sometimes I wish Roger Moore would come back with her. 46:38.404 --> 46:45.087 I know what a car is, some kind of jetpack, or I'm probably going to wear a union jacket, but you need me. 46:45.307 --> 46:46.528 It's not the eight. 46:47.568 --> 46:49.189 He'd rather punch you in the neck. 46:56.641 --> 47:04.344 Now who would like... Who would like this segment to continue for a while? 47:04.944 --> 47:07.145 If you like boggins, would you raise your hands? 47:07.825 --> 47:12.347 Oh, that's a very good showing for boggins. 47:15.208 --> 47:20.390 Did you hear about the giant bird who couldn't fit in at the tiny bird school? 47:20.950 --> 47:22.851 He was massively ostrich-sized. 47:23.325 --> 47:24.426 Hey, hey, hey! 47:24.886 --> 47:25.166 Thanks, guys. 47:25.186 --> 47:26.067 Come on, that's good. 47:26.087 --> 47:27.107 These are made-up jokes. 47:27.888 --> 47:28.228 Yeah? 47:28.248 --> 47:29.909 Listen to that, Mari. 47:29.969 --> 47:30.669 Wherever you are. 47:31.310 --> 47:33.171 Can we have Dids and Trish on the stage? 47:33.231 --> 47:34.992 A big round of applause for Dids and Trish, please. 47:43.900 --> 47:45.281 And they painted beards on. 47:45.321 --> 47:46.401 There you go. 47:46.421 --> 47:49.023 Thank you very much folks. 47:49.123 --> 47:49.703 Thank you. 47:49.763 --> 47:50.764 Have an enjoy. 47:50.864 --> 47:51.704 And six music. 48:08.899 --> 48:16.924 It was recorded live at the Electric Brahms on Thursday evening, after we did our fun thing in the afternoon. 48:16.944 --> 48:21.147 Thanks again to everyone who came along and everyone who contributed to our Song Wars competition. 48:21.187 --> 48:24.389 It was great fun and we really enjoyed it, so thanks for that. 48:24.829 --> 48:27.111 Right now we're going to get back into text the nation this week. 48:29.773 --> 48:30.513 Text the nation. 48:30.633 --> 48:32.575 Text, text, text, text the nation. 48:32.615 --> 48:33.595 What if I don't want to? 48:33.835 --> 48:34.596 Text the nation. 48:34.636 --> 48:35.657 But I'm using email. 48:35.817 --> 48:36.557 Is that a problem? 48:36.577 --> 48:37.378 It doesn't matter, text. 48:39.619 --> 48:42.882 It takes the nation, this week, could be summed up with the phrase, things in the street that you nick. 48:43.362 --> 48:43.942 I suppose. 48:44.083 --> 48:46.184 But this is a classier program, isn't it so? 48:46.204 --> 48:47.625 Trying to take the emphasis off the nicking. 48:47.685 --> 48:49.547 Off the stealing, off the illegality. 48:49.567 --> 48:53.010 So re-appropriated street junk. 48:53.190 --> 48:56.753 Like, for example, I remember when I was at school, I went to boarding school like listeners. 48:57.413 --> 48:59.554 Like a posh school, right? 49:00.234 --> 49:13.859 And in my dormitory, I thought it would be a fun thing to jazz up the dormitory if I got some things that I'd found in the street and brought them into the dormitory to make it look more groovy, like a kind of student room. 49:14.660 --> 49:22.783 So I found some stacks of discarded newspapers, like copies of the Evening Standard that hadn't been sold and they'd just leave them out at the end of the night, right? 49:23.363 --> 49:26.204 And so... Unless they're the copies for the following morning. 49:26.864 --> 49:27.364 No, they weren't. 49:27.404 --> 49:28.044 They definitely weren't. 49:28.545 --> 49:31.686 They were discarded ones that were going to be cleared away by the council or whatever. 49:32.206 --> 49:41.288 So I kind of transported these stacks of newspapers back to the dorm and built like a wall around my bed with these stacks. 49:41.308 --> 49:42.349 How many stacks were there? 49:42.529 --> 49:42.969 Loads. 49:43.329 --> 49:43.609 Really? 49:43.649 --> 49:44.409 Yeah, like about 40. 49:46.730 --> 49:49.191 And constructed this wall of newspapers. 49:49.211 --> 49:49.611 That's cool. 49:50.191 --> 49:54.212 And then like the housemaster came in and he flipped his wig, right? 49:54.232 --> 49:55.213 And he said, what are you doing? 49:55.233 --> 49:56.053 Are you like a tramp? 49:56.973 --> 49:58.454 Take these back onto the street. 49:58.474 --> 50:00.055 Why are you bringing this rubbish in here? 50:00.155 --> 50:01.135 It's not rubbish, sir. 50:01.195 --> 50:04.797 I'm making a wall of newspapers out of newsprint. 50:05.057 --> 50:06.297 That's a perfect example. 50:06.638 --> 50:09.619 We've had some confessions from people within Six Music here. 50:09.639 --> 50:17.442 We've got a text from Tom, who produces Music Week, who says, My parents still have a set of traffic lights I once liberated in their garage. 50:17.943 --> 50:21.724 I woke up one morning after a night out and they were propped up behind the door in my bedroom. 50:22.545 --> 50:24.886 I think, brackets hope, they were being replaced. 50:25.788 --> 50:27.910 So he must have had those traffic lights for years. 50:28.211 --> 50:31.935 That is the ultimate bit of reappropriation there. 50:32.175 --> 50:33.476 Everyone covers traffic lights. 50:34.117 --> 50:35.819 Here's one from Katie in Islington. 50:36.359 --> 50:44.067 After some central London riots while I was at university in about 2001, we ended up with a giant McDonald's M on our kitchen. 50:44.087 --> 50:46.029 We managed to wire it up and light it up. 50:46.670 --> 50:47.210 Good one. 50:47.330 --> 50:48.110 That's pretty cool. 50:48.130 --> 50:56.493 I mean, if you go to Los Angeles, right, on Sunset or Melrose, I can't remember one of those, there's an antiques shop there and they sell all that kind of stuff. 50:56.713 --> 50:59.754 They charge thousands for that kind of thing. 51:00.134 --> 51:04.355 You know, like a Bob's big boy, big boy man. 51:04.375 --> 51:05.476 Diner, yeah. 51:05.516 --> 51:06.536 Big hollow plastic man. 51:06.756 --> 51:10.719 That kind of thing, and like a big golden arches, you would get loads of them. 51:10.759 --> 51:12.781 Here's one from Jordan from Stowmarket. 51:13.181 --> 51:18.086 When my friends and I were around 14, and this is a troubling one, all right, this is really troubling. 51:18.466 --> 51:19.587 I should end with that one, actually. 51:19.607 --> 51:20.428 I'm going to end with that one. 51:20.788 --> 51:21.348 I'll do another one. 51:21.368 --> 51:25.031 Have we reminded listeners that we are in no way condoning the illegal remove? 51:25.051 --> 51:28.234 Theft is wrong, but it can be ambiguous when things are just left in the street. 51:28.314 --> 51:30.536 It's not ambiguous, Joseph Cornish. 51:30.596 --> 51:31.617 No, come on, it can be. 51:32.097 --> 51:36.339 You don't leave something just in the street if you really, you know, if it's precious to you. 51:36.719 --> 51:39.240 If it's council property, you do, because it belongs on the street. 51:39.260 --> 51:40.561 It's street furniture. 51:40.681 --> 51:43.282 OK, Mr Evening Standard Bedwall. 51:44.062 --> 51:44.742 Hi, Adam and Jo. 51:44.762 --> 51:53.626 When I was at Art College in Manchester, some friends of mine had an entire bus stop in their living room, complete with a sheet of glass at the back with bus route maps on it. 51:55.103 --> 51:56.464 from Nyle in Camberwell. 51:56.604 --> 51:58.224 That's an impressive level of mania. 51:59.065 --> 52:00.846 I'm still going to delay the impactful one. 52:02.046 --> 52:02.867 I don't know about this one. 52:02.907 --> 52:03.787 That's a bit creepy. 52:03.807 --> 52:04.047 Hang on. 52:04.347 --> 52:04.707 Here we go. 52:04.767 --> 52:05.588 Helen in Lewisham. 52:06.088 --> 52:09.810 Once I snaffled a whole bunch of Guardian newspapers left outside of newsagents in the early hours. 52:09.850 --> 52:11.951 When I woke in the morning, I was surprised to find them in my bedroom. 52:12.211 --> 52:16.013 Plus, I couldn't make any financial gain because it was all out of date in 24 hours. 52:16.053 --> 52:16.973 I would only read them once. 52:17.013 --> 52:18.394 It was pointless and shameful. 52:18.934 --> 52:20.495 She nicked ones from the day, though. 52:20.535 --> 52:21.235 I didn't do that. 52:21.255 --> 52:23.276 I did the ones from the previous day. 52:23.336 --> 52:24.558 Do you want to hear the disturbing one? 52:24.978 --> 52:25.759 Hi. 52:26.260 --> 52:31.087 When my friends and I were around 14, we found a dead cat in the street. 52:31.608 --> 52:37.456 We didn't take it, but we returned daily to worship our new cat God, which we aptly named Lucky. 52:38.377 --> 52:40.139 Love you by Jordan and Stowmarket. 52:42.340 --> 52:44.021 Why did you read that? 52:44.041 --> 52:44.601 I don't know. 52:44.641 --> 52:46.501 You know, I thought they'd actually taken the cat home. 52:46.841 --> 52:48.482 I didn't realize that they didn't take it. 52:48.922 --> 52:50.302 I was hoping that they did take it home. 52:50.322 --> 52:51.542 They were worshipping the cat. 52:51.602 --> 52:53.383 Just worshipping it in the street is not so good. 52:53.403 --> 52:56.343 Here's a funny email from some people who worshipped the corpse of a dead cat. 52:56.643 --> 52:58.444 I'll read that out on the family show. 52:58.464 --> 53:03.205 I'm just trying to offset the pants in the street thing with a bit of darkness. 53:03.885 --> 53:04.285 Well done. 53:05.717 --> 53:06.197 Job done. 53:06.337 --> 53:06.617 Yeah. 53:08.198 --> 53:09.338 It's like Lord of the Cats. 53:09.799 --> 53:11.479 Keep these emails coming in, listeners. 53:11.499 --> 53:21.683 We're keen to hear how you have appropriated dead cats and recontextualized things you found in the street, whether it was a legal thing to do or not. 53:22.864 --> 53:24.765 Anyway, here's a free play right now. 53:24.805 --> 53:25.785 This is Ella Fitzgerald. 53:25.805 --> 53:26.605 This is yours, right, Joe? 53:26.625 --> 53:29.026 Yeah, this is my little bit of M.O.R. 53:29.146 --> 53:31.047 sing song, but this is such a beautiful song. 53:31.067 --> 53:32.228 Have you heard Ella Fitzgerald? 53:32.388 --> 53:32.888 She's great. 53:32.908 --> 53:33.388 Yeah, of course. 53:33.648 --> 53:35.289 She's got a good voice, wouldn't you say? 53:35.749 --> 53:36.609 It's just one of the best. 53:36.689 --> 53:38.530 And this is literally like having a bath. 53:38.710 --> 53:40.391 I say that too much, don't I, literally? 53:40.411 --> 53:42.251 Because it's not literally like having a bath. 53:42.492 --> 53:42.732 No. 53:42.772 --> 53:44.472 But it's like, it is like a warm bath. 53:44.512 --> 53:47.533 I mean, it would be if I started soaping you down while this was playing. 53:47.553 --> 53:48.094 Would you mind? 53:48.114 --> 53:49.714 Then it would be literally like having a bath. 53:49.794 --> 53:51.475 This is called with a song in my heart. 53:51.635 --> 53:55.456 This is the voice of the big British castle. 53:55.516 --> 53:59.078 You are listening to Adam and Jo on 6 Music. 53:59.118 --> 53:59.698 We are on top. 54:05.349 --> 54:10.291 That's a good song, isn't it? 54:10.371 --> 54:11.212 It's the White Stripes. 54:11.432 --> 54:21.016 If you listen regularly to this show, listeners, you might know there's like a really sort of stinky dog that comes in here. 54:21.076 --> 54:21.816 Come on, he's sweet. 54:22.096 --> 54:23.317 He is very, very sweet. 54:23.397 --> 54:24.917 But he loves us. 54:25.097 --> 54:27.058 He's really friendly. 54:27.098 --> 54:27.638 This is the thing. 54:27.678 --> 54:28.699 He's really friendly. 54:29.379 --> 54:32.621 But he's got some problems, hasn't he? 54:32.962 --> 54:34.663 He's got some problems with his anal glands. 54:34.743 --> 54:36.164 He's just getting old, I guess. 54:36.184 --> 54:38.005 I feel like he can speak to us sometimes. 54:38.105 --> 54:38.886 Well, he talks. 54:38.946 --> 54:47.911 I mean, rumor is around the building that he was the dog that was on a program called That's Life that went out in the 70s and famous for being able to say the word, sausages. 54:49.112 --> 54:51.174 But anyway, he's called boggins this dog. 54:51.554 --> 55:04.884 He's being he comes into the studio every now and then if you listen regularly I don't know he just wanders around and you know someone opens the door and he trucks dampers in yeah It's funny old business mix your face, but as you know we were thinking of having him put down 55:06.325 --> 55:06.906 You were thinking. 55:06.926 --> 55:07.626 I was thinking. 55:07.726 --> 55:09.127 Well, we were both considering it. 55:09.207 --> 55:16.692 We've got a lot of messages from people who would like that to be done, as well as a lot of messages from people who would like to take care of him. 55:16.912 --> 55:21.535 We put it to the audience vote at the Electric Proms and it was unanimous support for keeping Boggins alive. 55:21.555 --> 55:22.356 Is it actually unanimous? 55:22.436 --> 55:28.580 It was as if they thought that the idea of killing a living thing just because it was getting a bit old was disgusting and wrong. 55:29.000 --> 55:29.260 Yeah. 55:30.181 --> 55:32.524 That is a little bit harsh when you put it like that, though, isn't it? 55:32.544 --> 55:36.948 Well, but sometimes, you know, sometimes it's difficult with... It depends on Boggan's quality of life, doesn't it? 55:37.108 --> 55:38.089 Just looking at the producer now. 55:38.129 --> 55:40.571 James, do we need to point out this is not a real dog we're talking about? 55:40.591 --> 55:41.332 Okay. 55:41.773 --> 55:42.193 No, we don't. 55:42.393 --> 55:43.334 We've had some email. 55:46.738 --> 55:47.779 We've had some emails. 55:48.800 --> 55:51.062 I would like to weigh in on the Boggins the Dog debate. 55:51.543 --> 55:55.907 As I listen to your show on my iPod in the morning, the entire show is heard through my in-ear headphones. 55:56.308 --> 56:02.954 However, the deranged grunts and incessant lickings of dearest Boggins the Dog do not make for pleasant listening. 56:03.315 --> 56:08.960 It feels a bit like my head is being sexually molested by a rabid man-dog who is trapped inside my brain. 56:10.201 --> 56:12.283 Not a pleasant experience in the morning. 56:12.863 --> 56:18.887 Therefore I urge you to put poor Boggins the dog down in as humane of a method as possible. 56:19.547 --> 56:23.490 Dash, lethal injection, gas chamber, electrocution. 56:24.311 --> 56:25.751 I'm not going to read the last two. 56:26.332 --> 56:32.116 Love, kiss kiss, big kiss, big kiss, big hug, big hug, small kiss, small kiss, big hug, small hug, big kiss, John. 56:32.556 --> 56:38.520 There are six kisses from Kate in London and she says, dear Adam and Jo, please for the love of God put down Boggins. 56:39.080 --> 56:42.203 I really can't cope with the sloppery saliva noise he makes. 56:42.263 --> 56:43.043 It repulses me. 56:43.124 --> 56:43.644 Sloppery? 56:43.864 --> 56:45.065 Yeah, that's a good word, don't you think? 56:45.085 --> 56:46.566 Yeah. 56:46.907 --> 56:50.610 And then someone else says, please put us all out of our misery by putting boggins out of his. 56:53.492 --> 56:56.294 Linda Kavanagh says, please get rid of boggins. 56:56.314 --> 56:58.076 The thing is, he still seems happy. 56:58.516 --> 56:58.756 Yeah. 56:58.796 --> 57:01.138 I mean, he is suffering, but he's still happy. 57:01.318 --> 57:05.502 Here's a little clip just to remind you of what a sweet chap boggins is. 57:09.284 --> 57:20.709 Hello, my name's Boggins and I love you and I stink mainly because I just done a poo in a corner and I ate a little bit but I love you and I'm sweet so I'm gonna lick your face 57:22.950 --> 57:47.341 I hope you don't mind and outside I found a bird and I ate it and then I was sick and then I ate that as well but I love you and I'm sweet so I'm gonna lick your face and bite your legs hope you don't mind also I'm gonna sleep in your bed tonight in your nice clean sheets even though I've just been rolling in poo because I love you 57:50.942 --> 57:52.524 How could you not laugh at that? 57:52.824 --> 57:57.189 What's the point in playing a minute of just incomprehensible dog-snuffling noises? 57:57.830 --> 58:02.354 Feels like he's speaking to me, is the thing, when I listen to him snuffling and snuffling. 58:02.375 --> 58:03.095 Really? 58:03.115 --> 58:04.617 Yeah, because I... I don't get that. 58:04.657 --> 58:05.898 Such a sweet little chap. 58:06.139 --> 58:08.041 Because, you know, we got a lot of messages and support. 58:08.902 --> 58:11.785 Some people really love that little fellow. 58:12.465 --> 58:19.810 And, for example, Stephen Tizard says, Dearest Adam and Jo, after listening to this week's podcast, I was mortified to hear that Boggins was going to be put down. 58:20.211 --> 58:28.817 As a member of the newly founded RSPS Boggins, I felt it my duty to rescue Boggins from such an unnecessary death. 58:29.437 --> 58:36.883 And he has done it in an imaginary way, and he wants to know if it's an imaginary dog that he's imaginarily saving. 58:37.303 --> 58:39.204 Does that mean he's imaginarily saved? 58:40.145 --> 58:40.826 Do you know what I'm saying? 58:41.026 --> 58:43.609 Like he's imagined a whole rescue scenario for Boggins. 58:43.970 --> 58:47.154 And because Boggins is an imaginary dog, does that mean that Boggins has been rescued? 58:47.174 --> 58:48.195 Because Boggins is what? 58:48.896 --> 58:49.817 He's imaginary. 58:50.098 --> 58:50.639 He's what? 58:50.719 --> 58:53.823 You told me last week he was imagining- This is getting very complicated. 58:54.323 --> 58:56.887 What are you- Well, what are you- The layers. 58:58.246 --> 58:59.806 You said last week he was imaginary. 58:59.826 --> 59:01.267 I'm playing along with that, yes. 59:01.367 --> 59:01.687 Did I? 59:02.447 --> 59:03.327 Now he's real, is he? 59:03.707 --> 59:04.487 Well, is he real? 59:04.747 --> 59:09.048 Now he's not, because you can't talk about putting down a real dog on a radio show like that. 59:09.068 --> 59:10.029 It would be weird. 59:10.269 --> 59:10.929 He's very ill. 59:12.129 --> 59:13.249 He's not real. 59:13.449 --> 59:14.810 Is he real or is he not real? 59:14.850 --> 59:17.510 You're scrambling my mind now. 59:17.590 --> 59:18.891 I can't answer that question. 59:19.651 --> 59:22.752 Lexi Vasiliu says, you can't put boggins down. 59:22.812 --> 59:24.392 I'll look after him if you don't want him anymore. 59:25.433 --> 59:29.095 If he comes in again, the way to find out whether he's real or not is to kick him. 59:29.775 --> 59:30.936 You can't kick a dog. 59:31.296 --> 59:32.557 Not even an imaginary one. 59:32.577 --> 59:33.757 This is what I'm saying. 59:33.797 --> 59:34.257 You're right. 59:34.918 --> 59:36.679 No, but see if he responds, you know what I mean? 59:36.979 --> 59:37.739 Let's say tweak him. 59:37.759 --> 59:39.300 Let's say tweak him. 59:39.320 --> 59:40.721 It didn't mean violently. 59:40.761 --> 59:41.941 I meant a little bit to happen. 59:42.261 --> 59:47.064 What's wrong with stroking him and giving him cuddle and seeing if he licks your face or bites your leg? 59:47.084 --> 59:47.984 Because he stinks. 59:48.024 --> 59:49.185 He does absolutely reek. 59:49.665 --> 59:50.426 can't cuddle him. 59:50.766 --> 59:52.247 He's absolutely rank. 59:52.547 --> 59:53.848 Here's some hot rats. 59:53.888 --> 59:56.529 Here's the hot rats with you got to fight for your right to party. 59:56.669 --> 01:00:05.174 That's Gaz and Danny from Supergrass masquerading as the hot rats there with their cover of the Beastie Boys you got to fight for your right to party. 01:00:05.554 --> 01:00:13.039 You can still listen to the shows that they did for six music on the iPlayer and what were they called the Sunday Best? 01:00:14.617 --> 01:00:15.758 Month of Sundays. 01:00:16.138 --> 01:00:17.319 I'm such an ignorant guy. 01:00:17.419 --> 01:00:21.103 I mean, I find it very hard to remember anything, the older I get. 01:00:21.403 --> 01:00:23.605 Actually, this is something that I wanted to talk to you about, Joe. 01:00:23.625 --> 01:00:25.086 I mean, we've spoken about this before. 01:00:25.466 --> 01:00:27.148 Remembering people's names, right? 01:00:27.488 --> 01:00:34.434 I mean, it just doesn't get any easier for me, even though I downloaded Darren Brown's memory podcast thing. 01:00:34.854 --> 01:00:35.575 How does he do it? 01:00:35.975 --> 01:00:37.116 He's got various tricks. 01:00:37.556 --> 01:00:38.597 A memory cathedral? 01:00:39.078 --> 01:00:39.798 Right, right, right. 01:00:39.838 --> 01:00:42.701 Going through a house and assigning... That's what Hannibal Lecter does. 01:00:43.081 --> 01:00:47.225 But it's just not possible when you're introduced to someone, it's a loud room or whatever. 01:00:47.245 --> 01:00:52.869 We should explain, like a memory cathedral is a technique for remembering things and you remember a physical space in your head. 01:00:52.909 --> 01:01:04.499 You imagine a house or a cathedral or a mansion and you imagine in great detail each room and you put objects or hang pictures that remind you of particular things, right? 01:01:04.599 --> 01:01:05.199 Is that the idea? 01:01:05.219 --> 01:01:06.040 Yeah, kind of thing. 01:01:06.120 --> 01:01:15.366 So if you wanted to do, like, if you needed to memorize a whole shopping list, for example, then you would assign different items to different parts of that imagined space. 01:01:15.807 --> 01:01:19.629 And another thing, what's the other really popular technique is, what is it? 01:01:19.669 --> 01:01:21.610 Is it associating an object with an event? 01:01:21.851 --> 01:01:27.575 Yeah, well, a good one that has worked for me in the past is, for example, our producer's called James Sterling. 01:01:27.875 --> 01:01:30.937 So I would imagine something being stirred. 01:01:31.417 --> 01:01:36.198 like a cup of coffee being stirred, maybe by a starling or something like that. 01:01:36.218 --> 01:01:38.179 Does this make you feel loved, James? 01:01:38.919 --> 01:01:43.280 So, you know, I'm imagining a starling stirring some coffee. 01:01:43.340 --> 01:01:45.221 So there's a little memorable image there. 01:01:45.281 --> 01:01:50.302 And I'm going to remember James Sterling there, although I might call him James Starling or James Coffee Starling. 01:01:51.042 --> 01:01:52.723 That's the only potential problem with that. 01:01:53.803 --> 01:01:55.583 But it's an unforgettable image, though. 01:01:55.723 --> 01:01:56.043 Exactly. 01:01:56.063 --> 01:01:57.524 The starling stirring the coffee. 01:01:57.724 --> 01:01:58.064 Sweet. 01:01:59.645 --> 01:02:04.847 It's a whole new vista of nightmares that's opened up for me, though, because of the school run, right? 01:02:04.947 --> 01:02:07.628 And having to go to school with my children... And say hi to parents. 01:02:07.768 --> 01:02:09.469 Saying hi to parents. 01:02:09.789 --> 01:02:11.230 I am no good. 01:02:11.290 --> 01:02:14.611 And my wife, she's got like a photographic memory, and she's brilliant. 01:02:14.891 --> 01:02:19.453 She remembers absolutely everyone, and what their children's names are, and all this kind of thing. 01:02:20.553 --> 01:02:21.754 The kids are difficult. 01:02:21.834 --> 01:02:23.054 I forgot your daughter's name. 01:02:23.314 --> 01:02:24.055 That's fair enough. 01:02:24.135 --> 01:02:26.196 I can't remember my friends' children's names. 01:02:26.236 --> 01:02:27.536 There's so many of them, for goodness sake. 01:02:27.556 --> 01:02:32.818 I can't remember my family's names, let alone the names of my children of friends. 01:02:33.199 --> 01:02:36.400 But then when I'm going into school, it's a nightmare for me. 01:02:36.440 --> 01:02:37.000 I'm quaking. 01:02:37.080 --> 01:02:38.721 For a start, it's very early in the morning. 01:02:39.181 --> 01:02:40.482 And I don't like getting up before 10. 01:02:40.862 --> 01:02:42.943 But since I've had a family, I've had to. 01:02:42.963 --> 01:02:44.523 You get up at 6.30 these days. 01:02:44.543 --> 01:02:45.604 It's a living nightmare. 01:02:46.304 --> 01:02:50.445 And so going to school, your brain is barely functioning. 01:02:51.106 --> 01:02:56.567 And then you're suddenly met by people sort of going high and smiling at you and stuff and waving. 01:02:56.587 --> 01:02:59.208 And you're supposed to remember who they are and what their son's name is. 01:02:59.248 --> 01:03:00.369 And I can never do it. 01:03:00.569 --> 01:03:01.729 What's wrong with just a high? 01:03:01.909 --> 01:03:02.169 Hey! 01:03:02.369 --> 01:03:09.012 Because every now and again it's absolutely clear that I can't remember their name and they say Adam to me, right? 01:03:09.373 --> 01:03:20.438 And you should come back with their first name in response and I don't and I feel so bad and I can tell that they are going, you just are an idiot hole and you can't, you know, it's so rude not to remember my name. 01:03:20.458 --> 01:03:21.478 You've met me several times. 01:03:21.618 --> 01:03:22.359 You know what I think? 01:03:22.379 --> 01:03:22.559 What? 01:03:22.939 --> 01:03:24.120 I think that's their fault. 01:03:24.740 --> 01:03:26.781 Well... I think you're mature enough 01:03:27.381 --> 01:03:28.521 for people to forgive you that. 01:03:28.721 --> 01:03:29.722 I hope so, I really do. 01:03:29.742 --> 01:03:31.362 And you shouldn't get upset about it. 01:03:31.582 --> 01:03:34.963 He is one that maybe I wouldn't have been forgiven for, though. 01:03:35.203 --> 01:03:40.684 The other day, my wife said, can you please tell Frank's teacher that he keeps forgetting his homework? 01:03:40.824 --> 01:03:44.325 Can you ask her to ensure that he takes it home with him at the end of every day? 01:03:45.245 --> 01:03:46.905 So I'm like, yeah, OK, where am I? 01:03:46.965 --> 01:03:48.085 Talk to Frank's teacher, OK. 01:03:48.406 --> 01:03:49.886 So I go into the classroom with him. 01:03:50.146 --> 01:03:51.186 There's no one there, right? 01:03:51.326 --> 01:03:52.086 We're the first in. 01:03:52.466 --> 01:03:54.887 And then the next person to come in is this lady. 01:03:55.507 --> 01:03:58.049 And she looks familiar and I'm like, ah, there you go, Frank's teacher. 01:03:58.490 --> 01:04:01.392 So I'm talking to her and I'm saying, hi, yeah. 01:04:01.492 --> 01:04:02.693 And she's like, oh, hello, how are you? 01:04:02.713 --> 01:04:05.455 I'm like, yeah, good, good, good, yeah, yeah, yeah. 01:04:05.595 --> 01:04:11.740 And I say sort of half-heartedly because I'm not 100% sure it's his teacher, but I'm thinking, I'm going to throw myself into this. 01:04:12.501 --> 01:04:18.747 Yeah, um, Frank keeps forgetting to bring his homework back, so I'm really sorry about that. 01:04:18.767 --> 01:04:20.709 And I was, and she's like, oh, yeah, yeah. 01:04:20.729 --> 01:04:28.956 I was like, yeah, I was, what, so I'm wondering if this, if you can sort of just remind him and, and stuff just to make sure he, he does. 01:04:29.176 --> 01:04:30.217 And she's like, hmm. 01:04:31.378 --> 01:04:33.400 Okay, um, I don't know. 01:04:33.620 --> 01:04:36.463 And then, you know, obviously I realised it wasn't his teacher. 01:04:36.483 --> 01:04:36.963 Who was it? 01:04:37.003 --> 01:04:37.844 It was just a parent. 01:04:38.324 --> 01:04:39.285 A parent that I'd met before. 01:04:39.305 --> 01:04:39.865 Someone you know? 01:04:39.926 --> 01:04:41.147 Yeah, oh yeah, I'd met them before. 01:04:41.507 --> 01:04:42.268 A number of times. 01:04:43.328 --> 01:04:45.250 And... That's terrible. 01:04:45.290 --> 01:04:46.351 It was absolutely awful. 01:04:46.391 --> 01:04:46.951 I was mortified. 01:04:46.971 --> 01:04:49.133 I just wanted to run and jump out of the window. 01:04:49.153 --> 01:04:49.534 What about... 01:04:50.094 --> 01:04:51.135 This technique, right? 01:04:51.375 --> 01:04:53.896 This is something that happened to me when we were at the Sony Awards. 01:04:53.916 --> 01:04:57.438 A producer came up who used to produce for us at the other radio station. 01:04:58.038 --> 01:04:59.099 And he said, hey, Joe. 01:04:59.119 --> 01:05:00.640 I said, hey. 01:05:02.881 --> 01:05:03.541 Didn't say his name. 01:05:03.921 --> 01:05:06.623 And he just came straight back with, you don't remember my name, do you? 01:05:06.783 --> 01:05:07.243 Nice. 01:05:07.783 --> 01:05:09.084 And so what did I come back with? 01:05:09.604 --> 01:05:10.685 Yes, of course I remember. 01:05:10.725 --> 01:05:12.506 I said, of course I remember your name. 01:05:13.486 --> 01:05:14.287 This was my tactic. 01:05:14.547 --> 01:05:18.469 Are you really accusing me of not being able to remember your name? 01:05:18.769 --> 01:05:22.051 I said to him and he came back with, yes I am. 01:05:22.351 --> 01:05:24.092 You really don't remember my name, do you? 01:05:24.372 --> 01:05:28.854 So it went from jokey to quite a serious confrontation within a couple of seconds. 01:05:29.334 --> 01:05:30.435 So I stuck to my guns. 01:05:30.455 --> 01:05:34.517 I was just like, yes, and I can't believe you're asking me to actually say your name. 01:05:34.597 --> 01:05:35.438 No way! 01:05:36.058 --> 01:05:36.898 That's what I went for. 01:05:37.819 --> 01:05:41.159 I was still slightly tongue-in-cheek, but not a lot of tongue anymore. 01:05:41.180 --> 01:05:42.220 Talk about Curb your enthusiasm. 01:05:42.240 --> 01:05:43.320 Rapidly diminishing tongue. 01:05:43.360 --> 01:05:43.600 What? 01:05:43.680 --> 01:05:46.321 You're accusing me of not remembering your name now? 01:05:46.581 --> 01:05:47.421 I'm insulted! 01:05:47.441 --> 01:05:50.262 It got quite aggressive, and he got... You don't. 01:05:50.322 --> 01:05:51.002 You don't remember it. 01:05:51.022 --> 01:05:52.223 Stop pretending you do remember it. 01:05:52.243 --> 01:05:52.663 You don't. 01:05:52.683 --> 01:05:54.123 I was like, course I do. 01:05:54.463 --> 01:05:56.364 How dare you... It got really bad. 01:05:56.584 --> 01:05:57.564 How did it finish? 01:05:57.684 --> 01:05:58.104 It didn't. 01:05:58.204 --> 01:05:59.045 It just tailed off. 01:05:59.365 --> 01:05:59.685 Whoa. 01:06:00.345 --> 01:06:00.545 Yeah. 01:06:00.745 --> 01:06:02.605 So that's a, you know, that's a cautionary tale. 01:06:02.625 --> 01:06:03.786 That's a tactic not to do. 01:06:04.026 --> 01:06:04.306 Yeah. 01:06:04.406 --> 01:06:06.706 I say, fess up as soon as possible. 01:06:06.726 --> 01:06:07.026 Well, I did. 01:06:07.046 --> 01:06:13.547 I just said to her, after a few uncomfortable seconds had gone by and she was staring out the window thinking, that guy's an idiot. 01:06:14.247 --> 01:06:16.168 I just said, I'm so sorry. 01:06:16.408 --> 01:06:18.448 I just called you Frank's teacher, didn't I? 01:06:18.468 --> 01:06:20.208 I was talking to you as if you were Frank's teacher. 01:06:20.288 --> 01:06:21.389 You're not Frank's teacher. 01:06:21.429 --> 01:06:22.829 I'm really, really sorry. 01:06:23.069 --> 01:06:26.750 But even the act of saying it just made me seem even more pathetic and adult. 01:06:26.830 --> 01:06:27.530 You know what I'm saying? 01:06:27.970 --> 01:06:29.450 I think you're very human and lovable. 01:06:31.625 --> 01:06:35.249 God he's here again Quickly get out woggins. 01:06:35.289 --> 01:06:46.422 Look I've got to talk about the free play here is a track from the very best's album We've played their single before that they did with the guy from vampire weekend, but this is I'm really enjoying the album It's the kind of thing. 01:06:46.442 --> 01:06:47.883 I wasn't sure I was gonna enjoy 01:06:48.684 --> 01:06:50.985 But it's grown on me like a wonderful fungus. 01:06:51.145 --> 01:06:52.065 This is Yalira. 01:06:52.305 --> 01:06:54.706 I'm doing a gig with John Richardson this week at the 100 Club. 01:06:54.946 --> 01:06:55.366 Cool! 01:06:55.906 --> 01:07:00.948 I think he's emceeing or... I can't remember if he's emceeing or doing a stand-up bit himself. 01:07:01.048 --> 01:07:02.708 He's a very talented stand-up, that guy. 01:07:03.169 --> 01:07:04.069 I'm looking forward to it. 01:07:04.529 --> 01:07:07.490 And looking forward to seeing you if you're coming along on Thursday. 01:07:07.510 --> 01:07:09.291 No, I'm not going to... Ah, sorry. 01:07:09.311 --> 01:07:10.411 I wouldn't invite you. 01:07:10.931 --> 01:07:12.952 Do you like just fun quizzes? 01:07:13.132 --> 01:07:13.792 I love quizzes. 01:07:13.812 --> 01:07:14.893 You love just a fun quiz? 01:07:14.933 --> 01:07:15.913 Sure, I love a fun quiz. 01:07:15.933 --> 01:07:16.993 Just for no reason? 01:07:17.293 --> 01:07:17.934 Yeah. 01:07:17.954 --> 01:07:20.195 A sort of general knowledge kind of a quiz? 01:07:20.395 --> 01:07:20.635 Mm-hmm. 01:07:20.675 --> 01:07:21.455 Do you want to do one? 01:07:21.475 --> 01:07:22.195 The listeners could do one. 01:07:22.275 --> 01:07:23.456 I'm very bad at general knowledge, though. 01:07:23.536 --> 01:07:24.756 Well, it's pop cultural knowledge. 01:07:24.776 --> 01:07:28.137 The listeners could join in at home or wherever they are. 01:07:28.258 --> 01:07:28.778 Just for fun. 01:07:29.258 --> 01:07:31.299 We like fictional bands, you know what I mean? 01:07:31.419 --> 01:07:31.619 Yeah. 01:07:31.659 --> 01:07:31.959 Don't we? 01:07:31.979 --> 01:07:34.600 We like a good fictional band in a novel aura. 01:07:34.680 --> 01:07:37.041 So I'm going to read you the name of a fictional band. 01:07:37.061 --> 01:07:38.681 You have to tell me what movie it comes from. 01:07:38.701 --> 01:07:39.482 OK, good one. 01:07:40.302 --> 01:07:41.483 Hey, that's my bike. 01:07:42.184 --> 01:07:43.545 Hey, that's my bike. 01:07:43.605 --> 01:07:44.626 What film's that from? 01:07:45.086 --> 01:07:45.707 An old film. 01:07:45.927 --> 01:07:46.908 Nineties, even. 01:07:47.128 --> 01:07:47.448 Is it? 01:07:47.468 --> 01:07:49.910 I mean, there's a few of these. 01:07:49.950 --> 01:07:51.672 So how long should I give you to think about them? 01:07:51.972 --> 01:07:52.312 I've no idea. 01:07:52.332 --> 01:07:53.493 Hey, that's my bike. 01:07:53.673 --> 01:07:54.034 No idea. 01:07:54.474 --> 01:07:55.275 Reality Bites. 01:07:55.495 --> 01:07:57.076 Reality Bites of course. 01:07:57.096 --> 01:07:58.357 How about this one? 01:07:59.078 --> 01:08:00.459 Timmy and the Lords of the Underworld. 01:08:00.479 --> 01:08:02.561 Come on. 01:08:02.801 --> 01:08:03.902 That's not the Lost Boys, is it? 01:08:04.022 --> 01:08:04.242 Timmy! 01:08:05.083 --> 01:08:06.104 and the Lords of the Underworld. 01:08:06.384 --> 01:08:06.824 Timmy! 01:08:07.584 --> 01:08:07.884 Timmy! 01:08:08.545 --> 01:08:09.065 What's that? 01:08:09.205 --> 01:08:09.885 What's that? 01:08:10.546 --> 01:08:11.906 South Park, you nutbag. 01:08:13.007 --> 01:08:13.767 Kurt Wild. 01:08:14.487 --> 01:08:15.648 Oh, I know Kurt Wild. 01:08:16.028 --> 01:08:17.129 That's spelled at Gold Mine. 01:08:17.149 --> 01:08:18.809 Famous ruxing a Kurt Wild, yes. 01:08:19.330 --> 01:08:19.870 Nick Rivers. 01:08:20.783 --> 01:08:22.664 Nick Rivers, I know Nick Rivers! 01:08:22.704 --> 01:08:23.665 Come on, push! 01:08:24.365 --> 01:08:24.726 80s film. 01:08:25.046 --> 01:08:25.666 Zuker Brothers. 01:08:25.866 --> 01:08:26.547 Yes, yes. 01:08:27.667 --> 01:08:28.348 Oh yes, yes, yes. 01:08:28.628 --> 01:08:29.168 Top Secret. 01:08:29.228 --> 01:08:30.449 Yes, Val Kilmer. 01:08:31.290 --> 01:08:31.870 Sim One. 01:08:32.691 --> 01:08:33.691 Sim One. 01:08:33.751 --> 01:08:35.592 That's from Sim One. 01:08:35.612 --> 01:08:36.913 That's our fictional rock star. 01:08:36.953 --> 01:08:37.774 She's good though, isn't she? 01:08:38.494 --> 01:08:40.376 If she existed in the real world, she'd be very famous. 01:08:40.396 --> 01:08:41.316 She's computer-generated. 01:08:41.576 --> 01:08:44.038 I know that gig, the big stadium gig, is amazing. 01:08:44.078 --> 01:08:47.841 That's one of the most incredibly idiotic films ever made. 01:08:48.321 --> 01:08:49.602 Okay, Baldwin and the Whiffles. 01:08:50.082 --> 01:08:50.623 What? 01:08:50.743 --> 01:08:51.584 That's a made-up one. 01:08:51.704 --> 01:08:53.745 No, it's in a film, Baldwin and the Whiffles. 01:08:53.805 --> 01:08:57.067 The lead singer is, I think, well, it's a film with Johnny Depp in it. 01:08:57.348 --> 01:08:58.108 Not Alec Baldwin. 01:08:58.388 --> 01:08:59.649 No. 01:08:59.829 --> 01:09:00.430 Johnny Depp. 01:09:00.450 --> 01:09:02.892 That's a good name for a band though, don't you think Baldwin and the Whiffles? 01:09:02.952 --> 01:09:03.472 Definitely. 01:09:03.851 --> 01:09:04.731 It's from Crybaby. 01:09:04.751 --> 01:09:06.131 John Waters Crybaby. 01:09:06.192 --> 01:09:07.012 Oh, there you go. 01:09:07.152 --> 01:09:07.872 Crucial Taunt. 01:09:08.372 --> 01:09:09.432 Crucial Taunt. 01:09:09.472 --> 01:09:09.952 Who's that? 01:09:10.172 --> 01:09:11.153 That's famous, man. 01:09:11.233 --> 01:09:11.873 Crucial Taunt. 01:09:11.973 --> 01:09:12.793 Nineties famous. 01:09:13.033 --> 01:09:13.693 Uh, Singles? 01:09:14.233 --> 01:09:15.093 Nah, Wayne's World. 01:09:15.433 --> 01:09:16.474 Wayne's World. 01:09:16.554 --> 01:09:17.954 I don't remember that from Wayne's World. 01:09:17.974 --> 01:09:18.734 Wild Stallions. 01:09:18.954 --> 01:09:19.554 With a lie. 01:09:19.734 --> 01:09:20.235 There you go. 01:09:20.255 --> 01:09:20.795 That's easy. 01:09:20.835 --> 01:09:21.735 That's bollanteau. 01:09:21.775 --> 01:09:22.095 Yeah. 01:09:22.575 --> 01:09:23.175 Cherry Bomb. 01:09:24.315 --> 01:09:25.216 Cherry Bomb. 01:09:25.456 --> 01:09:26.356 This is obscure. 01:09:26.476 --> 01:09:27.396 Can I say Singles again? 01:09:27.616 --> 01:09:27.896 No. 01:09:28.136 --> 01:09:29.456 There's some bad bands in Singles. 01:09:29.957 --> 01:09:31.277 It's a film that stars a duck. 01:09:32.432 --> 01:09:33.153 Oh, Howard the Duck. 01:09:33.173 --> 01:09:33.513 Yes. 01:09:33.793 --> 01:09:34.094 Nice. 01:09:34.614 --> 01:09:36.536 How many other films star a duck? 01:09:36.796 --> 01:09:41.080 And final one, what film is this fictional rock star from? 01:09:41.500 --> 01:09:42.321 Lady Gaga. 01:09:45.043 --> 01:09:46.244 The Arts is Baby's Day out. 01:09:47.305 --> 01:09:47.826 That's the end. 01:09:48.326 --> 01:10:15.695 of the quiz it's just a fun quiz it's just a fun quiz here's peter bjorn and john peter bjorn and john with the home base sad there tiny bit overplayed oh come on it was a question no do you think it's a tiny no no you're gonna start telling me that hey yah by outcast is overplayed next you freak of nature was that a remix of that or is that the original mix that's the one boy i forgot it went all bongo crazy you didn't hear um desert island discs with that lady sailor on the other day did you i should have poured in her selections 01:10:16.435 --> 01:10:22.556 It was, and this is going to sound very sexist and reductive, but it was the most classic selection of lady music you've ever heard. 01:10:22.636 --> 01:10:23.496 What kind of thing? 01:10:24.616 --> 01:10:25.597 There was... Is there some enya? 01:10:25.677 --> 01:10:27.137 There's a bit of Phil Collins on there. 01:10:27.657 --> 01:10:31.898 There was Boys of Summer by Don Henley was on there. 01:10:32.138 --> 01:10:32.778 Any M people? 01:10:33.658 --> 01:10:38.079 There could well have been some M people, but I mean, I wish, maybe we'll try and call it out. 01:10:38.099 --> 01:10:39.019 It'll be online, won't it? 01:10:39.099 --> 01:10:40.439 It'll be on the Radio 4 site. 01:10:40.459 --> 01:10:42.399 I'm sure they'll have a list of what was on Desert Island. 01:10:42.459 --> 01:10:45.200 Hit, lady hit, after lady hit, after lady hit. 01:10:45.660 --> 01:11:10.364 this classic punch me in the face please I deserve it here we go what up boosh thanks very much coming up still in the last half hour of the Adam and Jo six music radio show we have got some more textination and we've got made up jokes for you and the made up jokes are still coming in thick and fast I got some good ones man I've got some I've got some jokes that are so good that I they've made me suspicious 01:11:10.664 --> 01:11:11.245 Oh, really? 01:11:11.345 --> 01:11:14.307 A gentleman has sent in two really, really good jokes. 01:11:14.787 --> 01:11:17.289 So he's either a liar or some kind of a genius. 01:11:17.729 --> 01:11:17.910 Hmm. 01:11:18.230 --> 01:11:19.070 Or maybe both. 01:11:19.531 --> 01:11:19.691 It's 11.30. 01:11:20.291 --> 01:11:21.232 It's time for the news. 01:11:21.372 --> 01:11:21.993 Lovely stuff. 01:11:22.253 --> 01:11:22.953 Collects a Co. 01:11:23.033 --> 01:11:26.116 there with Crystal Frontier, Adam and Joe here on BBC Six Music. 01:11:26.156 --> 01:11:29.538 Check out some of these lady hits from Dame Ellen MacArthur. 01:11:29.938 --> 01:11:31.840 Hey, Yarr, which is what reminded me. 01:11:32.360 --> 01:11:33.241 You know, that's fair enough. 01:11:33.341 --> 01:11:37.044 These are all good songs, incidentally, but it was just having them all bang one after the other. 01:11:37.364 --> 01:11:38.345 Here with me, Dido. 01:11:39.045 --> 01:11:40.706 through the barricades, spanned our ballet. 01:11:42.287 --> 01:11:45.708 And then topping it off with, oh yeah, I wish it would rain down by Phil Collins. 01:11:46.289 --> 01:11:48.530 Topping it off with Fix You by Coldplay. 01:11:48.950 --> 01:11:49.170 Bang. 01:11:49.190 --> 01:11:49.671 Come on. 01:11:50.011 --> 01:11:51.011 That's adventurous taste. 01:11:51.311 --> 01:11:53.773 She could do like, she could compile a whole album just called it. 01:11:53.793 --> 01:11:54.753 That would be very successful. 01:11:54.773 --> 01:11:56.334 Babies like that sell really well. 01:11:56.534 --> 01:11:57.154 Yeah, they do. 01:11:57.174 --> 01:11:58.315 Do we have some made up jokes? 01:11:58.435 --> 01:11:58.615 Yes. 01:11:58.755 --> 01:11:59.255 Here's the jingle. 01:11:59.676 --> 01:12:01.296 I'm a funny person. 01:12:01.757 --> 01:12:03.338 I often make up jokes. 01:12:03.778 --> 01:12:07.860 My jokes are more amusing than those of other folks. 01:12:08.521 --> 01:12:16.537 When you hear my joke, I think you'll find that you agree Come on, you're all invited to a made-up joke party 01:12:17.941 --> 01:12:31.030 So I was reading these jokes last night, reading through all the listeners' jokes, and as I said, I came across these two really well-crafted jokes, the suspiciously well-crafted, and now that I look at them in the cold light of the morning, I don't think they can be made up. 01:12:32.031 --> 01:12:34.733 Do you know a guitarist that could make... Hang on. 01:12:35.053 --> 01:12:37.795 Do you know a guitarist that could make me a yeasty sandwich? 01:12:38.836 --> 01:12:39.897 No, but Johnny Marmite. 01:12:40.595 --> 01:12:56.328 brilliant you see suspiciously brilliant though here's the next one he sends and there's no context he just he just fires out the two jokes then says goodbye his joke number two knock knock knock knock knock knock knock knock who's there a spider 01:12:57.847 --> 01:12:58.408 That's alright. 01:12:59.128 --> 01:13:00.249 That's good man, that's good. 01:13:00.269 --> 01:13:01.050 That's good for the playground. 01:13:01.070 --> 01:13:02.552 Cheers, Jim Stewart. 01:13:02.832 --> 01:13:04.453 Johnny Marmite is a stroke of genius. 01:13:04.493 --> 01:13:04.734 Yeah. 01:13:04.894 --> 01:13:09.258 But the thing is, I can hear myself saying this every time I've said this in the past, I've been enthusiastic about jokes in the past. 01:13:09.278 --> 01:13:14.964 But Johnny Mar's been around for a long time, a lot of journalists in lots of frivolous mags have written gags about him. 01:13:15.164 --> 01:13:15.424 Yeah. 01:13:15.664 --> 01:13:17.967 Someone's probably come up with that one, Johnny Marmite. 01:13:18.467 --> 01:13:19.328 Have you got any jokes? 01:13:19.468 --> 01:13:20.390 Sure, I do. 01:13:20.931 --> 01:13:24.996 Here's one from Tom Baz in Londononon, he says. 01:13:26.098 --> 01:13:27.199 Greetings, says Tom. 01:13:27.540 --> 01:13:31.745 What does Martin Sheen shout when he desires his favourite fruit-based soft drink? 01:13:33.328 --> 01:13:33.808 I don't know. 01:13:34.309 --> 01:13:35.310 Apple Calypso now! 01:13:36.463 --> 01:13:38.604 Whoa, that's good. 01:13:40.926 --> 01:13:42.827 Very good, thanks, Tom. 01:13:43.647 --> 01:13:45.268 Oh dear, I can't read up that one. 01:13:45.389 --> 01:13:47.190 Shall I give you another one while you're waiting? 01:13:47.630 --> 01:13:52.053 Here's one from Emma in... Actually, no, I'll read you this other one. 01:13:52.093 --> 01:13:53.553 This is from Shane in Dublin. 01:13:54.034 --> 01:13:55.695 Dear Adam and Jo, I'm a big fan of the podcast. 01:13:55.735 --> 01:14:00.678 I listen to it in bed every Monday night in a sleepy drunken haze after coming home from the pub. 01:14:01.258 --> 01:14:05.163 On this penumbra of consciousness, I gleefully chuckle my way to sleep. 01:14:05.543 --> 01:14:07.105 Not the healthiest habit, I admit. 01:14:07.466 --> 01:14:08.347 Here's my joke, though. 01:14:08.767 --> 01:14:13.152 What was Danny Glover's response when asked why he was throwing out a skin-tight T-shirt? 01:14:14.013 --> 01:14:15.335 I'm getting too old for this shirt. 01:14:18.157 --> 01:14:18.818 That's good. 01:14:19.338 --> 01:14:20.599 That's definitely made up, though, isn't it? 01:14:21.940 --> 01:14:22.661 How about this one? 01:14:22.721 --> 01:14:25.083 Why was the 3D animator depressed? 01:14:26.104 --> 01:14:27.225 Because his life was a mesh. 01:14:28.286 --> 01:14:30.468 That's a good technical joke there. 01:14:30.568 --> 01:14:31.949 It's one for the folks at Pixar. 01:14:32.009 --> 01:14:33.670 Yeah, section of the audience would enjoy that. 01:14:33.710 --> 01:14:34.851 That's from Nick in Nottingham. 01:14:34.911 --> 01:14:38.514 By the way, Shane, you promised that you would cut down on your booze if I read out your joke. 01:14:38.574 --> 01:14:38.875 All right. 01:14:38.935 --> 01:14:40.296 So you stick to that promise. 01:14:40.676 --> 01:14:43.339 Here's one right now from Tom Bysuth. 01:14:43.999 --> 01:14:45.800 and he says, Hi Adam and Jo. 01:14:45.820 --> 01:14:54.166 I have a topical made up joke, especially if like me you live in Leeds with the ongoing bin men strike and of course everybody's experiencing the postal strike. 01:14:54.567 --> 01:15:03.013 His joke is, How do workers at an orchard show their dissatisfaction with their employer? 01:15:03.373 --> 01:15:04.914 They former won't pick it line. 01:15:08.247 --> 01:15:09.949 A bit better than that, please. 01:15:09.969 --> 01:15:10.810 Thank you. 01:15:10.830 --> 01:15:14.613 When you read out jokes, I go... I whoop with laughter. 01:15:14.813 --> 01:15:15.174 Do you? 01:15:15.274 --> 01:15:19.157 And you just go... I didn't understand it. 01:15:19.197 --> 01:15:19.878 I'm too thick. 01:15:19.898 --> 01:15:21.880 They won't pick it because they work in an orchard. 01:15:22.160 --> 01:15:22.380 Right. 01:15:22.400 --> 01:15:23.962 They're picking things for a living. 01:15:23.982 --> 01:15:24.582 That's what they do. 01:15:24.602 --> 01:15:26.084 They're picking apples, picking cherries. 01:15:26.124 --> 01:15:28.226 It's like what you do when your nose goes on strike. 01:15:29.207 --> 01:15:29.707 Oh, okay. 01:15:29.727 --> 01:15:31.068 Well, you've reduced it to that level. 01:15:31.088 --> 01:15:32.009 Well, that's a classic. 01:15:33.370 --> 01:15:34.831 What do you do? 01:15:35.531 --> 01:15:35.951 Come on there. 01:15:36.211 --> 01:15:40.273 Here's another one. 01:15:41.134 --> 01:15:41.334 What? 01:15:41.494 --> 01:15:42.254 Hello, here we go. 01:15:42.674 --> 01:15:51.038 Although the following joke is based around a pun and clever use of wordplay, I'm quite convinced that it has never been used before, therefore it's completely original and brilliant. 01:15:51.358 --> 01:15:53.499 I can't begin to tell you how proud I am of my efforts. 01:15:53.799 --> 01:15:58.101 Quote, I once scuppered a young child's plans for a nonviolent protest in India. 01:15:58.701 --> 01:16:00.702 It was like taking Gandhi from a baby. 01:16:02.870 --> 01:16:05.371 Craig Paradise from South End on Sea. 01:16:05.791 --> 01:16:06.511 That's very good. 01:16:06.731 --> 01:16:07.751 There's something there, isn't there? 01:16:07.771 --> 01:16:08.492 Yeah, I like that one. 01:16:08.512 --> 01:16:08.732 Yeah. 01:16:08.872 --> 01:16:09.292 That's good. 01:16:09.372 --> 01:16:10.192 Sophisticated. 01:16:10.912 --> 01:16:11.812 One last one from me. 01:16:12.253 --> 01:16:13.853 This is Jason from Jason Stubbs. 01:16:14.373 --> 01:16:18.674 What do you call a rock band formed by a tortoise, a hare, a monkey and an ostrich? 01:16:19.355 --> 01:16:19.835 I don't know. 01:16:20.015 --> 01:16:20.795 Smashing pipkins. 01:16:21.625 --> 01:16:22.325 Oh, that's good. 01:16:22.385 --> 01:16:23.326 I mean, that's retro. 01:16:23.426 --> 01:16:24.186 That's very retro. 01:16:24.506 --> 01:16:25.887 Younger listeners won't know what that is. 01:16:25.927 --> 01:16:26.647 Nice one, Stubsey. 01:16:26.687 --> 01:16:28.288 That's a 70s TV show. 01:16:29.489 --> 01:16:30.769 Can I do you some rapid fire ones? 01:16:30.809 --> 01:16:31.169 Go on then. 01:16:31.209 --> 01:16:32.890 Some kind of low quality rapid fire ones. 01:16:33.610 --> 01:16:35.051 What do you call a film directing worm? 01:16:35.551 --> 01:16:35.791 Don't know. 01:16:35.932 --> 01:16:36.512 Wrigley Scott. 01:16:36.812 --> 01:16:37.752 Bracket's probably done before. 01:16:37.792 --> 01:16:38.373 Very obvious. 01:16:38.473 --> 01:16:39.793 Kevin Tenuous, Palmer Ibiza. 01:16:40.334 --> 01:16:40.654 I like it. 01:16:41.674 --> 01:16:45.457 How does one attract members of the opposite sex during a nautical disaster? 01:16:46.398 --> 01:16:47.819 By using a flirtation device. 01:16:48.300 --> 01:16:48.600 Nice. 01:16:48.780 --> 01:16:49.781 Ed Z, North London. 01:16:50.802 --> 01:16:54.865 When and where is Superman getting buried in a crypt tonight? 01:16:55.946 --> 01:16:56.407 You know it. 01:16:56.627 --> 01:16:57.588 That's Ian Horseman. 01:16:57.668 --> 01:16:57.928 Yeah. 01:16:58.708 --> 01:17:00.169 Okay, one final one, right? 01:17:00.249 --> 01:17:02.791 This is from a family. 01:17:02.811 --> 01:17:04.592 We like family things on this show, right? 01:17:04.812 --> 01:17:05.452 Yeah. 01:17:05.752 --> 01:17:15.918 So this is Tracy Gregory, who sent in this little clip of her young son, her three-year-old son, Riley, providing a punchline for this joke read out by her partner, I think. 01:17:16.558 --> 01:17:16.999 Here it is. 01:17:17.759 --> 01:17:19.460 Oh, sorry, James, I sprang that one on you. 01:17:20.340 --> 01:17:23.542 It's too busy stirring coffee like a little starling. 01:17:23.582 --> 01:17:24.643 Like a little starling. 01:17:25.423 --> 01:17:26.004 Have you found it? 01:17:26.084 --> 01:17:26.404 Here we go. 01:17:27.365 --> 01:17:28.806 What do you call a line of Barbies? 01:17:30.686 --> 01:17:34.307 What do you call a line of Barbies? 01:17:34.327 --> 01:17:35.748 Oh, is that what it was? 01:17:35.788 --> 01:17:36.028 Yeah. 01:17:36.088 --> 01:17:37.729 I thought he said, what did you call a lion bar? 01:17:38.069 --> 01:17:38.189 No. 01:17:38.209 --> 01:17:40.009 What do you call a line of Barbies? 01:17:40.350 --> 01:17:41.710 A barbecue, that's good. 01:17:41.730 --> 01:17:42.650 That's very good. 01:17:42.670 --> 01:17:43.971 Did he watch the story there? 01:17:44.291 --> 01:17:45.751 He didn't make that up, the child, did he? 01:17:45.771 --> 01:17:47.152 Because that would be extraordinary. 01:17:48.372 --> 01:17:52.534 I don't think it was, he says, I sincerely hope that my wife and I made up this joke 01:17:53.534 --> 01:17:56.958 Ourselves for our three-year-old son and we didn't pinch it from someone. 01:17:57.358 --> 01:17:57.979 So yeah, they go. 01:17:58.019 --> 01:18:01.462 They believe they made it up themselves And that's good Riley was just providing the punchline. 01:18:01.502 --> 01:18:05.066 Thank you very much for all those made-up jokes I'm sure we'll have some more next week right now. 01:18:05.106 --> 01:18:08.810 Here's the dead weather with I cut like a buffalo I cut like a buffalo. 01:18:08.870 --> 01:18:14.655 That's the dead weather Adam and Joe here on BBC six music Let's have the text the nation jingle one last time 01:18:18.798 --> 01:18:19.759 What if I don't want to? 01:18:20.019 --> 01:18:21.861 But I'm using email. 01:18:22.041 --> 01:18:22.741 Is that a problem? 01:18:22.781 --> 01:18:23.642 It doesn't matter, taste! 01:18:25.899 --> 01:18:30.783 And it's all about, uh, nicking some stuff from the street with weak listeners. 01:18:30.983 --> 01:18:31.683 It's not about that at all. 01:18:31.743 --> 01:18:37.988 It's about re-contextualizing objects which have been abandoned in public spaces. 01:18:38.708 --> 01:18:39.009 Yeah? 01:18:39.089 --> 01:18:39.389 Nice. 01:18:39.849 --> 01:18:42.331 So here is one from Lucy Cook. 01:18:43.252 --> 01:18:43.772 No, it's not. 01:18:43.952 --> 01:18:44.973 Why does it say Lucy Cook? 01:18:45.013 --> 01:18:46.574 Oh, she's the person who's printed it out. 01:18:46.614 --> 01:18:47.335 Hello, Lucy. 01:18:47.815 --> 01:18:48.195 Yeah. 01:18:48.256 --> 01:18:48.816 Hey! 01:18:48.836 --> 01:18:49.917 She works. 01:18:49.997 --> 01:18:50.457 She works here. 01:18:50.617 --> 01:18:51.338 It is from her. 01:18:51.778 --> 01:18:52.878 Because she handed it to me. 01:18:52.898 --> 01:18:53.679 She handed it, right. 01:18:53.839 --> 01:18:54.519 Actually, she didn't. 01:18:54.659 --> 01:18:55.859 I printed this one out. 01:18:56.599 --> 01:18:57.360 A tissue of lies. 01:18:57.600 --> 01:18:59.780 This is from David in Watford, all right? 01:19:00.421 --> 01:19:04.302 I once found an electric LED dot matrix sign on my way home one night. 01:19:04.702 --> 01:19:09.443 After a while, I spent some time wiring up a car battery to it to see if it worked. 01:19:09.903 --> 01:19:11.504 To my amazement, it worked. 01:19:11.584 --> 01:19:13.204 I found it attached to a shop. 01:19:14.025 --> 01:19:17.146 And it said the words, girls, girls, girls, nude, 20p. 01:19:19.828 --> 01:19:22.772 That's the best thing in LED, Simon can possibly say. 01:19:23.994 --> 01:19:26.217 We had it in the kitchen until it caught fire. 01:19:26.638 --> 01:19:28.100 A friend offered to reprogram it. 01:19:28.180 --> 01:19:29.723 I said, why would I do that? 01:19:30.646 --> 01:19:33.128 I also have a working traffic light in my disco garage. 01:19:33.148 --> 01:19:33.428 Nice. 01:19:33.768 --> 01:19:35.269 You know, why are these things so desirable? 01:19:35.309 --> 01:19:39.251 For me, it's watching American teen movies. 01:19:39.291 --> 01:19:42.453 They always have road signs and stuff and neon lights, don't they, in their bedrooms. 01:19:42.513 --> 01:19:44.054 Like Tom Cruise in Risk for Business. 01:19:44.074 --> 01:19:48.457 He's got a very good neon sign that flashes while he indulges in some odonism. 01:19:48.897 --> 01:20:07.232 that's right it's quite a racy scene yes yes yes you wouldn't find in a film anymore and ferris bueller has he got that kind of stuff around his bedroom bound to bound to i'm going to go home and watch that racy scene tonight with my family that'll be fun here's one from adam from yeetlity yeetlity second that'll be right 01:20:08.584 --> 01:20:10.064 Oh, that's a tough one, isn't it? 01:20:10.624 --> 01:20:16.746 My brother-in-law saw a large, comfy, easy chair in the road outside his house and assumed somebody was refurbishing. 01:20:16.846 --> 01:20:17.926 Decided to take it. 01:20:18.446 --> 01:20:21.747 Three days later, him and all his housemates got terrible skin infections. 01:20:22.107 --> 01:20:27.408 They had received bed bugs from the free furniture, had to be quarantined for three weeks to get rid of the infection. 01:20:27.448 --> 01:20:28.548 That is the downside. 01:20:28.568 --> 01:20:29.489 That's very common, isn't it? 01:20:29.569 --> 01:20:32.089 I think we did that as students saw a big plush sofa. 01:20:32.629 --> 01:20:33.590 It was a bit damp. 01:20:33.730 --> 01:20:34.790 Never mind, it'll dry out. 01:20:35.470 --> 01:20:37.051 Brought it into our student flat. 01:20:37.251 --> 01:20:37.691 Scabies. 01:20:38.011 --> 01:20:39.412 Things start crawling out of it. 01:20:39.432 --> 01:20:40.312 That's right. 01:20:40.332 --> 01:20:41.473 You never know. 01:20:41.573 --> 01:20:46.094 I wouldn't go for a secondhand sofa or a discarded mattress being the worst one. 01:20:46.715 --> 01:20:48.595 No way! 01:20:48.996 --> 01:20:51.857 Jo in Primrose Hill, I found a homemade magician's box. 01:20:52.257 --> 01:20:54.158 Used to cut a woman in half in the street. 01:20:55.442 --> 01:20:56.404 Is that feasible? 01:20:56.904 --> 01:20:58.907 I suppose if the act had gone wrong. 01:20:58.927 --> 01:20:59.768 Here we go. 01:20:59.788 --> 01:21:05.556 Look, I told myself that if it was there 10 minutes later then it was definitely being thrown away and was fair game. 01:21:06.157 --> 01:21:09.782 Sure enough, 10 minutes later it was still there and I dragged it home. 01:21:10.923 --> 01:21:16.468 My excitement was slightly dampened when I found strange stains on the metal blades, but I kept it anyway. 01:21:16.928 --> 01:21:26.096 With hindsight, I may have either ruined an amateur magician's fledgling career, spoiled a child's birthday party, or concealed evidence from a horrific, conjuring bloodfest. 01:21:26.256 --> 01:21:27.157 The Evac could have been it. 01:21:27.217 --> 01:21:32.061 I mean, did I talk to you before on a slightly related note about finding this bike in France? 01:21:32.962 --> 01:21:33.222 No. 01:21:33.363 --> 01:21:34.764 I found it in a ditch, right? 01:21:35.044 --> 01:21:36.305 Disguarded by the side of the road. 01:21:36.325 --> 01:21:36.705 Oh, you did. 01:21:36.766 --> 01:21:37.046 Yes. 01:21:37.506 --> 01:21:40.028 And then, and I came back for it later as well. 01:21:40.188 --> 01:21:40.409 Yeah. 01:21:40.469 --> 01:21:41.890 After I'd hidden it behind a hedge. 01:21:42.671 --> 01:21:43.812 Moved it and hidden it! 01:21:44.929 --> 01:21:47.411 He prob- Yeah, well you know what was going on there, don't you? 01:21:47.611 --> 01:21:48.712 No, it was not a farmer. 01:21:48.732 --> 01:21:49.712 He hadn't abandoned it. 01:21:49.752 --> 01:21:50.453 He had. 01:21:50.693 --> 01:21:58.278 But if you want to leave a bike somewhere and you don't have a lock or anything to lock it to, you might hide it in a ditch or just put it out of sight in a bush. 01:21:59.139 --> 01:22:02.201 And you hope- But by the side of a main road in the middle of nowhere? 01:22:02.241 --> 01:22:08.885 Buckle's won't come along and- Listen, I feel bad about it this day and I'm worried that secretly I've been cursed because it was the devil's bike. 01:22:09.866 --> 01:22:10.686 I'm sure you're fine. 01:22:10.726 --> 01:22:11.187 I'm sure you're fine. 01:22:11.207 --> 01:22:12.968 This is why I've got my elbow in problem. 01:22:13.248 --> 01:22:16.589 Well, maybe it's why your bikes keep getting stolen the whole time. 01:22:16.649 --> 01:22:19.790 Here's a final one from Pete Brackett's student Sheffield. 01:22:19.971 --> 01:22:20.651 Close brackets. 01:22:21.271 --> 01:22:25.192 Hi, A and J. Me and my flatmates found a table football in a nearby skip. 01:22:25.673 --> 01:22:26.833 We took it late at night. 01:22:27.313 --> 01:22:29.174 It was very mucky and had dog poo on. 01:22:29.795 --> 01:22:32.197 as Boggins' table football's table. 01:22:32.838 --> 01:22:33.978 But that's another thing, isn't it? 01:22:34.019 --> 01:22:38.923 You get something home that you think is really exciting and then you play with it for a bit and then you... You discover why it was thrown out? 01:22:39.003 --> 01:22:39.243 Yeah. 01:22:40.084 --> 01:22:41.965 It's got dog poo on it. 01:22:42.145 --> 01:22:53.615 You know, don't forget listeners that if you have something to contribute to this during the week, if you're listening again or downloading the podcast, the email address is adamandjo.sixmusic at bbc.co.uk. 01:22:53.655 --> 01:22:55.256 No texts during the week, please. 01:22:55.276 --> 01:22:56.817 It'll be a total waste of money. 01:22:57.178 --> 01:22:58.779 Right now, here's the beta band with Gone. 01:22:58.959 --> 01:23:00.360 That was your free play, Joe. 01:23:00.540 --> 01:23:02.001 Sorry, I failed to realize that. 01:23:02.041 --> 01:23:02.581 Don't worry. 01:23:02.942 --> 01:23:04.182 That was the beta band. 01:23:04.262 --> 01:23:07.304 No, beta band from Hot Shots 2, their album. 01:23:07.524 --> 01:23:09.185 It's quite a melancholy selection, that one. 01:23:09.266 --> 01:23:10.086 Yeah, but it's good. 01:23:10.106 --> 01:23:10.686 Yes, very good. 01:23:10.706 --> 01:23:12.087 Very haunting and they're amazing. 01:23:12.227 --> 01:23:12.748 Beta band. 01:23:13.379 --> 01:23:13.939 They are lovely. 01:23:13.979 --> 01:23:15.020 That's it for us, folks. 01:23:15.320 --> 01:23:16.860 Stay tuned for Liz Kershaw. 01:23:16.900 --> 01:23:17.740 She's coming up very shortly. 01:23:17.800 --> 01:23:22.862 Don't forget to go to the blog and check out those highlights from the Electrical Proms. 01:23:23.122 --> 01:23:23.742 Thanks for listening. 01:23:23.762 --> 01:23:25.583 Thanks to everyone who's texted and emailed. 01:23:26.543 --> 01:23:28.104 Did you say check out the podcast already? 01:23:28.164 --> 01:23:28.664 Yeah, yeah, yeah. 01:23:28.684 --> 01:23:30.404 Check out where the podcast comes out Monday evening. 01:23:30.585 --> 01:23:31.905 Don't forget to check that out, of course. 01:23:31.925 --> 01:23:33.546 Yeah, and the Electric Proms video on the blog. 01:23:33.786 --> 01:23:36.066 We'll be back with you the same time next week. 01:23:36.126 --> 01:23:37.627 Right now, we're going to leave you with the fall. 01:23:37.687 --> 01:23:39.868 The money is sort of tabla. 01:23:39.928 --> 01:23:40.288 Take care. 01:23:40.308 --> 01:23:40.508 Love you. 01:23:40.528 --> 01:23:40.828 Bye. 01:23:40.868 --> 01:23:41.068 Bye.