WEBVTT 00:00.615 --> 00:03.477 tomorrow morning from 7 bright and early, Black Squadron 10. 00:04.017 --> 00:05.418 Are you gonna come in? 00:06.379 --> 00:06.799 No, no. 00:07.559 --> 00:09.581 Adam's saying, I said, no, I'm not coming in, all right? 00:10.001 --> 00:13.703 You only get Adam on the Adam and Jo show, all right? 00:13.803 --> 00:14.924 All right, how comes Adam? 00:15.164 --> 00:16.225 How you doing, man? 00:16.365 --> 00:17.145 I'm very well, Adam. 00:17.185 --> 00:17.846 How's your week been? 00:18.046 --> 00:19.127 It's been all right, tiring. 00:19.167 --> 00:20.187 Are you expecting a baby? 00:20.347 --> 00:20.588 Yes. 00:20.808 --> 00:21.448 Did you not know that? 00:21.468 --> 00:21.908 I didn't know that. 00:21.928 --> 00:22.689 Congratulations. 00:22.729 --> 00:23.389 Thank you very much. 00:23.569 --> 00:24.690 I've got to knit you something. 00:24.950 --> 00:25.050 Yeah. 00:25.070 --> 00:27.292 I was a bit worried when you were saying, may your needles never go blind. 00:27.312 --> 00:28.532 I thought it was a Pete Doherty thing. 00:28.572 --> 00:30.333 Very good. 00:31.114 --> 00:31.554 Very good. 00:31.994 --> 00:34.276 So listen, Adam, are you ready for this morning's show? 00:34.476 --> 00:34.676 Yes. 00:34.996 --> 00:35.256 All right. 00:35.296 --> 00:40.319 So it'll be Adam and Joe time, literally at the end of this record, Monkey Gone to Heaven by the Pixies. 00:40.500 --> 00:41.500 Have yourself a great weekend. 00:42.281 --> 00:44.982 Welcome to the big British castle. 00:45.142 --> 00:47.824 It's time for Adam and Joe to broadcast on the radio. 00:50.307 --> 00:55.329 and random talking in between and then eventually the whole thing will just end. 00:57.831 --> 01:01.232 Black Squadron! 01:01.252 --> 01:03.473 Always catch the beginning of the show. 01:03.933 --> 01:06.054 Black Squadron don't wanna miss a thing. 01:06.315 --> 01:08.416 That's not the right Black Squadron role. 01:08.436 --> 01:09.056 Black Squadron! 01:12.137 --> 01:14.358 Went to bed at a reasonable hour. 01:14.378 --> 01:17.340 Gonna be sharp on Saturday morning. 01:17.540 --> 01:19.761 That's the secret of the squadron. 01:23.410 --> 01:24.790 Hey, good morning, Black Squadron. 01:24.830 --> 01:34.493 You are the elite listening force that catch the Adam and Jo program, which is this, on 6 Music, live for the first half hour, 9am to 9.30. 01:34.914 --> 01:43.516 Black Squadron came into being because we were impressed by the fact that there were people out there who actually listened live, you know, rather than just on the podcast or listen again. 01:44.537 --> 01:46.597 But some people aren't happy about Black Squadron. 01:46.797 --> 01:48.598 Here's an email from Bernie Regan. 01:49.318 --> 01:50.639 Did you read this one in the week, Joe? 01:50.879 --> 01:51.259 Probably. 01:51.279 --> 01:52.040 I read them all. 01:52.520 --> 01:53.501 He says, hello chaps. 01:53.761 --> 01:54.321 Love the show. 01:54.521 --> 01:55.822 Happy, happy, happy. 01:55.842 --> 01:56.763 That's three happy's. 01:56.843 --> 01:57.543 That's very happy. 01:57.563 --> 02:00.465 Triple happy with almost everything you do, almost. 02:01.025 --> 02:03.627 However, I wanted to ask about this whole Black Squadron thing. 02:03.967 --> 02:08.630 I like to listen to the show from the start, but I don't want to have anything to do with Black Squadron. 02:08.870 --> 02:10.851 I don't like being told to do things. 02:10.871 --> 02:12.152 I think it's all a bit silly. 02:12.612 --> 02:15.474 And I'm usually in bed and in no position to do much anyway. 02:16.718 --> 02:20.480 about that do you want me to not listen until 9 30 a.m. 02:20.741 --> 02:34.710 I'd rather not because radio for my other station of choice at that time of day is broadcasting perhaps one of the most annoying pieces of radio ever produced I don't know what that might be what could that be James we better find out what that is anyway that's just Bernie's opinion 02:35.691 --> 02:40.678 And then he continues, or can I can I be given some form of special dispensation? 02:41.058 --> 02:44.644 Or is the or is it best that I just don't mention it and hope no one notices? 02:44.864 --> 02:50.712 Well, it's appreciated Bernie Regan He's he's implying there's some sort of forced conscription going on. 02:50.732 --> 02:51.794 There's no conscription 02:52.114 --> 02:54.275 No, it's entirely voluntary. 02:55.056 --> 03:02.399 You know, you won't find yourself in any way court-martialed or... What do they do to people who would refuse to sign up? 03:03.360 --> 03:04.400 Well, they put them in prison. 03:04.600 --> 03:04.960 Would they? 03:05.120 --> 03:05.641 In prison them? 03:05.921 --> 03:06.101 Yeah. 03:06.341 --> 03:08.422 Well, there won't be any of that for him. 03:08.742 --> 03:08.982 No. 03:09.322 --> 03:09.943 Or will there? 03:09.963 --> 03:10.443 Or will there? 03:10.623 --> 03:12.744 I think in the past we have threatened people, haven't we? 03:13.064 --> 03:13.504 Probably. 03:14.285 --> 03:15.786 Or what's the guy's name? 03:16.266 --> 03:16.966 Bernie Regan. 03:17.286 --> 03:20.588 Is the entire Black Squadron outside Bernie's house? 03:22.199 --> 03:23.821 Bernie, go to your window slowly. 03:24.601 --> 03:26.263 Very slowly. 03:26.323 --> 03:27.464 Draw back the curtains. 03:27.745 --> 03:36.273 If you can see people with eggs in their mouths, bread in their pockets and black squadron written across their foreheads, you're in terrible trouble, Bernie. 03:36.293 --> 03:38.075 Here's some music right now. 03:38.375 --> 03:40.838 This is Junior Mervyn with Police and Thieves. 03:41.218 --> 03:43.419 That was Junior Mervyn with Police and Thieves. 03:43.459 --> 03:46.060 Incidentally, we kicked the show off with Alabama Three. 03:46.420 --> 03:49.901 Woke up this morning, also known as the theme tune from the Sopranos. 03:50.281 --> 03:52.302 This is Adam and Joe here on BBC Six Music. 03:52.342 --> 03:54.503 It's a great pleasure to be with you this Saturday morning. 03:54.843 --> 03:56.404 We haven't issued our command. 03:56.484 --> 03:58.364 No, because we don't have one yet. 03:58.824 --> 04:02.646 We're still trying to decide between various commands. 04:03.626 --> 04:05.007 What if we do more than one command? 04:05.427 --> 04:05.747 Really? 04:05.767 --> 04:06.927 That's confusing. 04:06.967 --> 04:08.668 And people could choose which command they do. 04:10.205 --> 04:10.425 Yeah. 04:10.705 --> 04:14.128 Well, isn't that going to confuse some of the denser members of Black Squadron? 04:14.569 --> 04:15.329 What are you saying? 04:15.710 --> 04:17.371 Just that some of them are thick. 04:17.391 --> 04:18.132 A little bit. 04:18.612 --> 04:20.294 You were saying some of our listeners are thick. 04:20.574 --> 04:22.315 Some of the ones that put eggs in their mouths. 04:22.456 --> 04:23.156 Hey. 04:23.957 --> 04:25.438 They sent photos. 04:25.578 --> 04:26.219 We asked them to. 04:26.239 --> 04:26.639 That thick. 04:26.759 --> 04:28.180 Listen, I'm joking, Black Squadron. 04:28.521 --> 04:30.022 I don't want to antagonise you. 04:30.302 --> 04:33.045 Everyone out there will be thinking, is he talking about me? 04:33.825 --> 04:35.026 No, he's talking about someone. 04:35.106 --> 04:36.968 Maybe he is talking about me. 04:37.088 --> 04:38.309 He's talking about Johnny Eggmouth. 04:38.589 --> 04:40.651 I think they're some of the most sophisticated people in Britain. 04:40.731 --> 04:41.632 Of course they are. 04:41.732 --> 04:43.713 It was a little joke between me and the squadron. 04:43.733 --> 04:44.994 Right guys? 04:45.355 --> 04:45.955 Right? 04:46.376 --> 04:47.396 So what are you thinking? 04:47.416 --> 04:50.339 The squadron are stepping away from you, looking slightly belligerent and nervous. 04:50.519 --> 04:50.979 You wait. 04:51.099 --> 04:52.661 I've got some stories that'll make the squadron hate you. 04:52.681 --> 04:58.926 Well listen, you've got a free play coming up, so if you want to contextualise your free play, then we can give them the command just before the record. 04:59.546 --> 05:00.787 Yeah, yeah. 05:00.967 --> 05:08.170 Well, this is a slightly rambly thing in that it's a story joke. 05:08.630 --> 05:09.710 It's a story about music. 05:09.950 --> 05:12.912 What the record is, or you're going to tell us a story. 05:12.932 --> 05:22.936 I'm going to tell you a story about music, but the context of this story is that last week we were talking about bad grammar in pop, and that is a can of worms I kind of wish we'd never open. 05:23.502 --> 05:27.706 I know what you mean because you can... Yeah, we're being a bit pedantic maybe. 05:27.746 --> 05:28.427 Just for fun. 05:28.847 --> 05:31.449 We were being pedantic for fun about bad grammar and pop, right? 05:31.609 --> 05:37.455 But of course it would be wrong to apply strict grammatical rules to an area of creativity that should be freeform. 05:37.475 --> 05:38.216 Exactly. 05:38.396 --> 05:40.177 You know it's fun to have fun with words. 05:40.197 --> 05:43.660 I guess we were focusing on things that were just annoying, that stuck in your craw rather than... 05:44.601 --> 05:46.103 getting all the interest on your ass. 05:46.243 --> 05:46.824 Exactly. 05:47.225 --> 05:49.828 And you know, goodness knows we make enough mistakes ourselves. 05:49.928 --> 05:53.773 And we were corrected on a number of those mistakes by our listeners, as is quite right. 05:54.874 --> 05:59.120 We'll read out some comments that a listener sent about our Bowie mistakes a bit later on in the show. 05:59.860 --> 06:22.310 But one of the things we talked about, one of the comments we read out from Mr. Summerscales, I think his name was Owen Summerscales, he sent a big long email about bad grammar in songs and he was annoyed by the word pompatus in the Steve Miller song, The Joker, when he talks about calling himself Maurice and saying that he speaks of the pompatus of love. 06:22.830 --> 06:27.973 And then we got a whole load of emails in from listeners saying, he's not saying pompatus, he's saying the properties of love. 06:28.593 --> 06:35.478 So, because we believe almost everything that anyone tells us, we immediately apologized and said, oh yeah, sorry, he's not talking about pompatus, it's properties. 06:35.939 --> 06:40.822 Anyway, here is a message from Tony Reed in Aberdeen, and he's got the whole story for you, right? 06:41.523 --> 06:44.225 Hello again, Adam and Joe, presumably he's emailed us before. 06:44.265 --> 06:54.612 You read out an email from a Canadian listener who suggested that Steve Miller had made up a word in his 1973 song, The Joker, pompatus, some other listeners texted in to correct this, saying it was properties. 06:54.853 --> 06:57.555 Well, I'd just like to say those listeners are idiot holes. 06:58.035 --> 07:03.358 The lyric is most definitely pompatus, and as far as Mr Miller is concerned, it is a made-up word. 07:03.398 --> 07:06.760 He's been quoted as saying, it doesn't mean anything, it's just jive talk. 07:07.240 --> 07:08.321 Typical, Steve Miller. 07:08.961 --> 07:12.083 However, quite interestingly, there's a bit of history behind the word. 07:12.623 --> 07:26.891 Steve Miller had previously written a song in 1972 called Enter Maurice, which contained the lyric, my dearest darling, come closer to Maurice, so I can whisper sweet words of epismatology in your ear and speak to you of the pompatus of love. 07:28.572 --> 07:32.536 This is what is being referred to in The Joker, and that's why people call him Maurice. 07:33.757 --> 07:37.660 There's even a film called The Pompetous of Love by John Cryer, the actor, right? 07:37.901 --> 07:38.161 Really? 07:38.922 --> 07:42.445 Who was Ducky in, what's it called, Pretty in Pink? 07:42.485 --> 07:43.086 Pretty in Pink. 07:43.286 --> 07:44.547 I think it's the same John Cryer. 07:44.767 --> 07:45.468 Now we're going to find out. 07:45.488 --> 07:47.710 That's another mistake and get corrected on that. 07:48.391 --> 07:48.751 However, 07:49.972 --> 08:02.158 A lot of research has gone into the word, pompatus, and the origins can be traced back to a musician and songwriter called Vernon Green from a do-what band called the Medallions, in a song that Green wrote as a 14-year-old boy called The Letter. 08:02.358 --> 08:03.519 We've got a clip of that right now. 08:03.619 --> 08:04.259 Play that, James. 08:05.539 --> 08:16.345 Let me whisper sweet words of his mentality and discuss the pompatus of love and put them together and what have you had. 08:17.857 --> 08:23.620 So there you go, that's from the song The Letter by Vernon Green and the Medallions. 08:24.020 --> 08:28.103 Oh my darling, let me whisper sweet words of pismetality. 08:28.343 --> 08:28.843 Of what? 08:28.863 --> 08:29.844 Pismetality. 08:29.944 --> 08:30.284 All right. 08:30.424 --> 08:31.124 Made up word. 08:31.444 --> 08:33.505 And discuss the puppetoots of love. 08:33.966 --> 08:35.567 Both words were made up by Green. 08:35.827 --> 08:36.587 The puppetoots. 08:36.847 --> 08:38.768 The puppetoots, says Tony Reed. 08:38.828 --> 08:40.169 Both words were made up, you see. 08:40.789 --> 08:43.271 Pismetality, he says, describes the words 08:44.091 --> 08:47.773 of such secrecy they can only be spoken by the one you love. 08:48.274 --> 08:56.879 And puppeteats is a term he coined to mean, and check this out for weird, a paper doll fantasy figure who would be his everything and bear his children. 08:58.620 --> 08:59.921 I mean, everyone's got one of those, right? 09:00.641 --> 09:01.382 Everyone, yeah. 09:01.462 --> 09:03.863 Everyone has a paper doll fantasy figure. 09:04.183 --> 09:04.543 They do. 09:04.924 --> 09:07.665 Who would be their everything and bear their children. 09:07.685 --> 09:09.226 That's the bit that gets away. 09:09.246 --> 09:10.827 They were flat children, like flat Stanley. 09:10.987 --> 09:11.288 Right. 09:11.628 --> 09:13.509 I mean, she could bear paper children. 09:13.809 --> 09:18.131 I mean, if it was a difficult birth, though, you would be... Be what? 09:18.811 --> 09:20.192 Aww, let me go into it. 09:21.472 --> 09:22.433 Anyway, Tony Reed. 09:22.713 --> 09:25.114 So you see, that's where the word pompatus comes from. 09:25.134 --> 09:29.836 It was a little adaptation of puppeteats from the letter. 09:29.976 --> 09:31.316 That's a good story, isn't it, Joe? 09:31.436 --> 09:32.257 What a story. 09:32.577 --> 09:35.698 At the beginning of that story, I was interested and excited. 09:35.738 --> 09:37.699 In the middle, I started to go woozy. 09:38.399 --> 09:40.660 And towards the end, I was just thinking about something else. 09:40.680 --> 09:42.361 Something completely different. 09:43.041 --> 09:44.503 last night, what I did last night. 09:45.845 --> 09:49.190 But I like the funny words and the paper lady, that bit was fun. 09:50.072 --> 09:51.494 Those are the things that will stay with me. 09:51.714 --> 09:58.003 Well, it's a very, very long winded way of saying A, thank you very much Tony Reed from Aberdeen for your letter and B, 09:58.504 --> 09:59.825 We were right in the first place! 09:59.845 --> 10:00.145 Yes! 10:00.505 --> 10:03.047 We should just have more self-confidence, less self-doubt. 10:03.567 --> 10:09.590 And it proves that we're not the kind of show that just looks stuff up willy-nilly on Wikipedia and then pretends it's our actual knowledge. 10:10.030 --> 10:12.452 You know, we make mistakes, and mistakes are charming. 10:12.712 --> 10:14.092 They're like an old antique chair. 10:14.333 --> 10:14.973 Do you know what I mean? 10:15.093 --> 10:15.333 I do. 10:15.393 --> 10:17.814 Or a scuffed up family car that you're affectionate towards. 10:17.895 --> 10:18.555 A charming old man. 10:18.575 --> 10:19.916 Mistakes are rare, yeah. 10:20.036 --> 10:21.937 Mistakes, and to do them is a skill. 10:23.578 --> 10:24.658 And we're one of the best. 10:24.738 --> 10:26.199 We're one of the best at that skill. 10:26.259 --> 10:27.860 We have got skills. 10:28.240 --> 10:33.223 So stand by for your command, Black Squadron, because here, are you ready to play this, that song then, your song? 10:33.503 --> 10:33.743 Yeah. 10:34.123 --> 10:36.284 Oh, you know, you're not because it's not even the pompatus one. 10:36.344 --> 10:37.645 It's the sugar cubes you're going to play. 10:37.725 --> 10:38.085 No, I'm not. 10:38.105 --> 10:39.466 I'm going to play the swinging medallions. 10:39.526 --> 10:39.926 Sorry. 10:40.067 --> 10:42.048 Not the medallions, but the swinging medallions. 10:42.168 --> 10:42.368 All right. 10:42.388 --> 10:43.448 Double shot of Baby's Love. 10:43.548 --> 10:43.809 Oh, yes. 10:43.829 --> 10:44.409 This command. 10:44.489 --> 10:45.189 This is the command. 10:45.229 --> 10:46.510 Stand by, Black Squadron. 10:46.550 --> 10:49.572 During this song, you must perform a forward roll. 10:49.992 --> 10:51.873 Oh, a little bit of scratching in the background there. 10:52.934 --> 10:58.440 That was probably Einar doing the scratching from the sugar cubes. 10:58.480 --> 10:58.800 Yes. 10:59.301 --> 11:01.142 When was that record then? 11:01.162 --> 11:01.142 92. 11:01.182 --> 11:04.085 92. 11:01.723 --> 11:04.085 So scratching had been around for a while. 11:04.145 --> 11:06.588 I heard some very poor scratching in a record the other day. 11:08.291 --> 11:11.432 Paul Young off the No Palais album. 11:11.472 --> 11:12.373 You love that album. 11:12.413 --> 11:12.713 I do. 11:12.753 --> 11:15.774 I've got an 80s playlist going on and that album's on there. 11:16.354 --> 11:17.495 And Come Back and Stay. 11:18.635 --> 11:20.016 Oh, there's some terrible scratching. 11:20.116 --> 11:20.836 No, is there really? 11:20.876 --> 11:26.559 Yeah, it's like somebody's just gone, oh, we better have some scratching in this because it's, you know, it's the new thing. 11:27.359 --> 11:28.079 So someone's just gone... 11:32.481 --> 11:32.781 Like that. 11:33.781 --> 11:39.082 Like if someone with no skill at scratching has just tried to get some kind of vaguely rhythmic noise. 11:39.642 --> 11:40.683 I'm sure it was good at the time. 11:41.583 --> 11:44.203 Well, it's the same thing now with Auto-Tune, isn't it? 11:44.643 --> 11:47.144 Yes, Auto-Tune's so fashionable though. 11:47.284 --> 11:48.164 It's ridiculous. 11:48.504 --> 11:54.585 All the big booming systems going down my street, you know, the cars with the blacked-out windows, they've all got Auto-Tune coming out of them. 11:55.065 --> 11:55.685 Ludacris. 11:56.165 --> 11:58.806 Yeah, we had... He does Auto-Tune. 11:58.906 --> 11:59.426 Ludacris. 11:59.546 --> 11:59.746 Yeah. 12:00.366 --> 12:06.772 Have we had a definitive, you know, pointer as to where the ordinary person on the street can get hold of AutoTune? 12:07.133 --> 12:10.976 We want to know whether there's some kind of plug-in, ideally for GarageBand, an AutoTune plug-in. 12:10.996 --> 12:11.837 That would be good, wouldn't it? 12:11.917 --> 12:13.759 Presumably there's a bit of software you can download. 12:13.779 --> 12:14.800 It's just a filter, right? 12:15.100 --> 12:15.320 Is it? 12:15.661 --> 12:17.602 Yeah, and then you'd have a musical typing thing. 12:17.702 --> 12:19.504 A little... Like a vocoder. 12:19.524 --> 12:20.885 You actually don't need it. 12:25.149 --> 12:26.050 a bit of technology. 12:26.090 --> 12:27.870 You can just do it with your voice. 12:28.191 --> 12:36.715 Well you can do it by hitting your throat can't you? 12:37.195 --> 12:38.676 That's slightly vocoder-ish isn't it? 12:38.716 --> 12:42.177 But they do a lot of note bending stuff as well. 12:42.538 --> 12:42.938 Yeah they do. 12:43.738 --> 12:46.040 The Black Eyed Peas is all over the Black Eyed Peas record, isn't it? 12:46.180 --> 12:47.401 That's a new record. 12:47.441 --> 12:49.322 That's at the cutting edge of records, that record. 12:49.342 --> 12:50.903 Have you seen the video for that record? 12:51.143 --> 12:51.343 No. 12:51.703 --> 12:52.064 Have I? 12:52.464 --> 12:54.405 It's all like the lawnmower man and stuff. 12:54.425 --> 12:55.186 That's right, virtue. 12:55.246 --> 12:59.048 Well, he was the one that appeared during the election broadcast, wasn't he, was he? 12:59.088 --> 13:00.189 That's right, the hologram. 13:00.289 --> 13:00.769 In 3D, yeah. 13:00.789 --> 13:01.490 Is it Will.i.am? 13:01.530 --> 13:01.930 Will.i.am. 13:01.950 --> 13:02.711 He's from the future. 13:02.771 --> 13:03.491 He's from the future, isn't he? 13:03.511 --> 13:05.633 He's the most cussing edge individual on the planet. 13:05.913 --> 13:06.914 On the planet. 13:06.974 --> 13:10.336 He's the most cutting edge man on the planet. 13:10.576 --> 13:10.896 Yes. 13:11.557 --> 13:13.318 Oh, imagine what it would be like to have tea with him. 13:14.198 --> 13:15.139 What would it be like? 13:15.259 --> 13:17.460 You would have come if you would touch it. 13:20.442 --> 13:21.662 Oh, I see. 13:22.603 --> 13:24.544 Listen, listen, listen, let's change the subject. 13:24.824 --> 13:26.445 I was in Borders this week. 13:26.505 --> 13:29.446 It's one of many, many shops where you can buy mags. 13:29.807 --> 13:30.827 And I was buying a mag. 13:30.907 --> 13:33.729 In fact, this was two weeks ago, but it stayed with me this event. 13:34.569 --> 13:36.570 And the transaction went very smoothly. 13:36.670 --> 13:37.670 I'd been queuing for a while. 13:37.710 --> 13:38.771 You know how they do it at that shop. 13:38.791 --> 13:41.211 They've only got two checkouts for the whole store. 13:41.712 --> 13:43.072 And you have to form a big queue. 13:43.092 --> 13:44.893 A lot of queuing there. 13:45.453 --> 13:46.493 Anyway, I finally got to the front. 13:46.513 --> 13:47.594 I was paying for my mag. 13:48.174 --> 13:49.874 And the transaction went really smoothly. 13:49.895 --> 13:56.937 And as I walked away, my foot caught in a stand holding a lot of books and magazines. 13:57.217 --> 13:58.798 And the whole stand came down. 13:58.858 --> 13:59.618 The whole thing? 13:59.638 --> 13:59.878 Yeah. 14:00.118 --> 14:00.518 Bad one. 14:00.598 --> 14:01.919 It just crashed down. 14:02.859 --> 14:18.440 and it was all going so well thanks a lot thanks bye-bye really embarrassing everybody turned and looked yeah uh it really did the magazine spilled out over a huge surface area it was very spectacular wow 14:19.561 --> 14:21.603 And I was really, really embarrassed. 14:21.663 --> 14:22.323 So you ran away. 14:22.864 --> 14:23.764 I couldn't handle it. 14:23.945 --> 14:28.228 You know, in a situation like that, you should be cool and calm and collected and laugh it off. 14:28.288 --> 14:28.528 Sure. 14:29.429 --> 14:30.409 I went really red. 14:30.670 --> 14:30.950 Yeah. 14:31.050 --> 14:32.091 And started humming and erring. 14:32.111 --> 14:32.671 And crying. 14:33.071 --> 14:35.013 And not crying, but I felt like crying. 14:35.353 --> 14:39.016 And I felt humiliated as I bent over to start picking them up. 14:39.056 --> 14:39.816 Did anyone help you? 14:39.916 --> 14:44.240 Yeah, they started to help me and they started to say, oh, let's just move that stand. 14:44.260 --> 14:45.420 That stand shouldn't have been there. 14:45.461 --> 14:45.961 Silly stand. 14:46.221 --> 14:47.322 Silly stand. 14:47.522 --> 14:48.282 Exactly. 14:48.302 --> 14:50.084 I said, no, no, no, no, it's all right. 14:50.104 --> 14:50.784 Keep the stand there. 14:51.004 --> 14:51.504 It is fine. 14:51.524 --> 14:52.005 It's my fault. 14:52.025 --> 14:52.765 Keep the stand there. 14:52.785 --> 14:54.006 Don't move the stand. 14:54.046 --> 14:55.167 Just leave it there. 14:55.347 --> 14:56.388 Everyone was looking. 14:56.728 --> 15:03.492 It was as if I'd accidentally killed someone and their guts had spilled out all over the floor and I was trying to put their guts back in. 15:03.512 --> 15:04.273 All right. 15:04.313 --> 15:05.513 Sorry, your guts will be fine. 15:06.354 --> 15:08.235 Don't help me. 15:08.655 --> 15:09.516 I'll put it back. 15:09.781 --> 15:12.002 I ran out of the shop, all flustered. 15:12.323 --> 15:12.903 I'm sorry. 15:12.923 --> 15:13.803 Has that ever happened to you? 15:13.884 --> 15:14.524 Anything like that? 15:14.564 --> 15:15.645 Please say it has. 15:15.805 --> 15:16.945 All the time, boy. 15:16.985 --> 15:18.446 You wait till you hear about the week I've had. 15:18.526 --> 15:19.987 But I could sue them. 15:20.848 --> 15:25.270 Have you been injured in a trip or fall at work that wasn't your responsibility? 15:25.390 --> 15:25.631 Yes. 15:25.851 --> 15:27.312 Yes, I have by the stand. 15:27.412 --> 15:30.153 I was humiliated and hurt by a dangerous display stand. 15:30.333 --> 15:32.335 It was not my fault that the man's guts fell out. 15:33.595 --> 15:34.616 At the cash register. 15:35.056 --> 15:36.397 I'm so sorry to hear that, man. 15:36.437 --> 15:37.578 Yeah, I just had to get that out. 15:37.858 --> 15:38.939 It's been a tough week, hasn't it? 15:38.959 --> 15:39.239 Yeah. 15:39.659 --> 15:44.843 Well listen, we're going to go to the news now and we'll talk more about our problems later on in the show. 15:44.863 --> 15:46.485 You mean there's something more important than that? 15:46.745 --> 15:48.326 It seems unbelievable, doesn't it? 15:48.426 --> 15:49.667 But it's 9.30 and time for the news. 15:50.680 --> 15:51.520 That's Lily Allen. 15:51.600 --> 15:52.461 Who is Lily Allen? 15:52.981 --> 15:57.183 She is the daughter of Reginald Perrin. 15:57.563 --> 15:57.963 Really? 15:58.443 --> 16:00.544 And she was brought up by the Queen. 16:00.644 --> 16:01.644 The kids love her, why? 16:02.625 --> 16:12.549 The kids love her because she used to be a bin man and they like the way she clears the streets and she's got a common touch and wears skirts. 16:12.889 --> 16:13.129 Thanks. 16:13.189 --> 16:15.150 What was the name of her first ever single? 16:17.252 --> 16:20.114 My boyfriends are not jockey. 16:20.154 --> 16:21.095 Am I allowed to say that? 16:21.535 --> 16:22.916 I don't think so, no. 16:22.936 --> 16:24.097 But that was the name of the single. 16:24.117 --> 16:24.978 What am I going to do about it? 16:24.998 --> 16:26.359 It's her potty mouth, not mine. 16:26.399 --> 16:26.820 That's terrible. 16:27.180 --> 16:28.361 I'm really sorry. 16:29.502 --> 16:32.985 Why are you asking me questions like that that I have to answer quickly? 16:33.005 --> 16:36.588 Have you been injured in a trip or a fall at work that wasn't your fault? 16:37.088 --> 16:38.429 That wasn't my fault. 16:39.210 --> 16:40.692 I'm really sorry, it's terrible. 16:41.492 --> 16:44.755 Listen, Black Squadron, we should sign you out because we're massively overdue. 16:45.336 --> 16:46.297 Oh, you did it? 16:46.377 --> 16:47.578 I wasn't listening. 16:47.938 --> 16:49.260 How did the forward rolls go? 16:49.820 --> 16:50.861 Black Squadron, I wonder. 16:51.362 --> 16:54.064 If you're a tall man like me, it can be quite painful on the spine. 16:54.665 --> 16:57.067 We got a picture from a guy who fell over doing his forward roll. 16:57.087 --> 16:58.028 We got a few pictures. 16:58.068 --> 16:59.770 We hope nobody hurt themselves. 16:59.930 --> 17:01.331 You got to be careful with the forward rolls. 17:01.571 --> 17:03.113 It's physically perilous, this show. 17:03.502 --> 17:07.226 Isn't it one of those, is it still fashionable, the forward roll in gymnastics, I wonder? 17:07.506 --> 17:11.090 Or is it one of those things that's come out of fashion because of health and safety? 17:11.110 --> 17:12.331 PC gone mad's been round. 17:12.512 --> 17:17.297 PC gone... I wouldn't do that forward roll if I was you. 17:18.978 --> 17:19.479 There he is. 17:19.679 --> 17:20.600 PC gone mad. 17:21.922 --> 17:23.443 He's fanned all the forward rolling. 17:23.483 --> 17:24.044 Hello, hello. 17:24.064 --> 17:25.866 What are you doing with that ladder over there? 17:27.110 --> 17:28.731 That's not so much PC though, is it? 17:28.751 --> 17:30.151 That's just health and safety. 17:33.053 --> 17:37.094 PC would be more like... Oh, that's got a few racist overtones. 17:37.134 --> 17:38.235 I wouldn't do that if I were you. 17:40.976 --> 17:42.137 That would be PC gone mad. 17:42.637 --> 17:44.518 It's like Bad Lieutenant all over again. 17:44.538 --> 17:46.179 They're doing it again, aren't they, with Nick Cage? 17:46.199 --> 17:46.879 They are, yeah. 17:47.199 --> 17:48.680 It's some famous director as well. 17:48.820 --> 17:49.100 Right. 17:49.480 --> 17:50.761 Can't remember who's someone good. 17:50.861 --> 17:52.001 Probably Takashi Miike. 17:52.241 --> 17:54.802 Probably the director of Midnight Meat Trait. 17:57.512 --> 17:57.993 true listeners. 17:58.033 --> 17:59.454 It was Rui Kitamura. 17:59.514 --> 17:59.995 That's right. 18:00.315 --> 18:03.158 Hey, but we got into this whole thing by talking about Lily Allen. 18:03.298 --> 18:05.420 Of course, she's going to be appearing at Glastonbury. 18:05.800 --> 18:07.202 Can't believe you said that bad word. 18:07.362 --> 18:08.263 It's not a bad word. 18:08.303 --> 18:10.005 It's a way that you can describe DJs. 18:10.045 --> 18:11.206 I wonder what the repercussions will be. 18:11.246 --> 18:16.171 You know, DJs have to deal with knobs and faders, that kind of thing, and they are disjockeys. 18:16.271 --> 18:16.691 All right? 18:16.891 --> 18:18.853 It's just the English language I'm using here. 18:18.933 --> 18:19.394 You're right. 18:19.714 --> 18:20.034 Right? 18:20.114 --> 18:20.295 Yep. 18:20.655 --> 18:21.655 Good. 18:22.256 --> 18:24.657 And our producer James did the cut gesture. 18:26.619 --> 18:28.320 The polish, the polishing a surface. 18:28.500 --> 18:30.141 The polish, the stop it gesture. 18:30.902 --> 18:32.843 Lily Allen of course is appearing at Glastonbury. 18:32.883 --> 18:36.766 Six Music will be there to cover the festival and if you aren't going along 18:37.726 --> 18:39.548 It all kicks off on Thursday night, of course. 18:39.688 --> 18:41.350 We will be arriving on Friday. 18:41.390 --> 18:42.150 That's me and Joe. 18:42.551 --> 18:44.452 Six Music will be covering... I'll be arriving Thursday. 18:44.512 --> 18:45.573 Oh, yes, you will, won't you? 18:45.613 --> 18:48.336 Yeah, I'm there a little bit early, just to get things ready. 18:48.656 --> 18:58.025 And our first show, I think, is Friday evening, but Six Music will be covering the event from midday on Friday, I think, and we'll be there for the whole weekend for a chance to be our guests. 18:58.525 --> 19:02.230 at Glastonbury and win a pair of tickets, go to the Six Music website right now. 19:02.270 --> 19:07.656 If you answer some simple questions, you could get yourself free Glastonbury tickets and join us there. 19:07.676 --> 19:08.417 It would be great to have seen. 19:08.437 --> 19:09.759 Have they fixed the questions there, James? 19:09.799 --> 19:13.002 There was a little bit of controversy, yeah, about the date of the first Glastonbury. 19:13.022 --> 19:13.683 That's been fixed. 19:13.863 --> 19:14.124 Good. 19:14.344 --> 19:15.065 It's all fine. 19:15.265 --> 19:18.628 So do go along there and check out that stuff on the website. 19:18.648 --> 19:20.430 We'd love to meet you at Glastonbury. 19:20.470 --> 19:25.115 And we were trying to think of ways that listeners to this show could identify themselves at the festival. 19:25.155 --> 19:37.406 Of course, there's the Stephen shout out, but it would be good to think of a visual way, an item of clothing that everybody could get their hands on, that they could wear, you know, so you'd be able to distinguish listeners at a distance. 19:38.107 --> 19:39.770 Maybe a very, very tall hat. 19:40.310 --> 19:40.751 A tall hat? 19:40.771 --> 19:42.694 Well, I mean, lots of people wear tall hats enough. 19:42.734 --> 19:44.015 Not specific enough. 19:44.055 --> 19:46.359 It's got to be something that you could be 100% sure. 19:46.619 --> 19:48.762 But something that's not going to ruin your day. 19:48.782 --> 19:50.584 We don't want you to paint your face green. 19:50.644 --> 19:52.807 It mustn't be a burden or uncomfortable in any way. 19:53.428 --> 20:00.075 So if you've got any ideas, listeners, for something simple that could easily identify listeners to this show, then do let us know. 20:00.135 --> 20:11.186 The text number is 64046 and the email is... Adamandjo.6musicatbbc.co.uk and all text to this programme will be charged at your standard message rate. 20:11.206 --> 20:12.888 Ah, it's enjoyable saying that stuff, isn't it? 20:13.427 --> 20:15.789 Here's Money Mark right now with hand in your head. 20:15.809 --> 20:21.993 Do you remember that bit in Terminator 2 when he calls his mum home? 20:22.354 --> 20:22.594 Sure. 20:22.734 --> 20:24.835 Asks about Wolfie, Max the dog. 20:25.556 --> 20:25.996 Remember? 20:26.116 --> 20:26.296 Yeah. 20:27.117 --> 20:33.482 And then you cut to the house and the mum, her arms turned into a massive shiny metal spike. 20:33.742 --> 20:33.982 Right. 20:34.322 --> 20:37.825 And it's clearly the Terminator talking using the mum's voice. 20:38.265 --> 20:38.686 That's me. 20:39.466 --> 20:40.167 That's who I am. 20:40.287 --> 20:40.627 Is it? 20:40.707 --> 20:41.027 Yeah. 20:41.267 --> 20:41.508 Why? 20:42.536 --> 20:45.900 I'm just thinking that we could both be terminators and there'd be nowhere the audience would know. 20:46.260 --> 20:46.961 Oh, I see. 20:47.101 --> 20:56.930 We'd be just talking in Adam and Jo's voice, but look at the webcam and there's two terrifying, soulless metal androids with red glowing eyes at the mics. 20:57.170 --> 21:03.553 The Terminator... The producer James is lying dead on the floor with a milk carton impaled through his forehead. 21:03.573 --> 21:06.555 It's just another Saturday at the office. 21:06.655 --> 21:07.896 Just a flight of fancy. 21:08.056 --> 21:09.457 Why did that suddenly get in your head? 21:09.537 --> 21:10.037 I don't know. 21:10.077 --> 21:12.018 I'm becoming a bit obsessed with Terminators. 21:12.258 --> 21:12.638 Are you? 21:13.179 --> 21:19.082 I haven't seen the new film, but something about the marketing is giving me a Terminator urge. 21:19.602 --> 21:22.725 Well, you know, we do have this clip that someone sent us in. 21:22.745 --> 21:27.830 A listener chopped together a couple of film reviews that were a broadcast on the BBC networks. 21:29.031 --> 21:33.035 And he's done quite a good job of mashing them together. 21:33.075 --> 21:34.617 Why not, as we're talking about Terminator? 21:34.637 --> 21:40.983 Yeah, so this is a guy that he just heard two completely different reviews from two completely different reviewers, one from 21:41.683 --> 21:44.426 Radio 5 and the other one from BBC 6. 21:44.907 --> 21:46.829 He's called Ben and he lives in Shepherd's Bush. 21:47.389 --> 21:48.991 And these reviews have confused him. 21:49.051 --> 21:54.596 I think Ben, his name's Ben Jackson, he expects a sort of consistent line from the BBC, you know? 21:55.297 --> 21:58.460 A sort of corporate take on something. 21:59.061 --> 22:01.984 And he hasn't been supplied with it by these two reviews. 22:02.745 --> 22:03.906 This is what Ben sent us. 22:04.326 --> 22:11.591 Terminator Salvation is, I have to say, for me, out of all the summer blockbusters so far, this one is absolutely in a class of its own. 22:11.651 --> 22:13.072 Life-threateningly dull. 22:13.112 --> 22:14.093 Really bounces along. 22:14.593 --> 22:16.454 So crushingly dull! 22:16.474 --> 22:18.055 The action sequence is breathtaking. 22:18.155 --> 22:19.936 A bad version of Transformers. 22:19.957 --> 22:20.837 It really does deserve it. 22:20.857 --> 22:21.918 It's really amazing. 22:22.538 --> 22:24.540 Also, the way it's directed, my goodness. 22:24.620 --> 22:25.920 He can't direct films. 22:26.201 --> 22:28.182 McGee will get to it. 22:28.202 --> 22:28.882 McGee! 22:28.902 --> 22:29.663 McGee! 22:29.703 --> 22:30.263 McGee! 22:30.564 --> 22:31.744 McGee managed to do it now. 22:31.804 --> 22:32.805 McGee! 22:32.845 --> 22:34.066 You can't make 22:34.406 --> 22:38.168 where the camera just whizzes in and out of the helicopter while it's crashing. 22:38.268 --> 22:47.133 And it's not often these days where you watch something and say, I do not know how they did that. 22:47.793 --> 22:49.194 Why did Christian Bale do it? 22:49.374 --> 22:54.016 You can see on screen he's marching around like he's about to hit somebody at any moment, acting, of course. 22:54.036 --> 22:56.338 He is absolutely rubbish in it. 22:56.878 --> 23:00.700 As I say, for me, it's the biggest and the best of any of the summer blockbusters. 23:01.020 --> 23:02.641 To be honest, I can't see anything else touching it. 23:05.447 --> 23:07.388 So that's commode, isn't it, snoring there? 23:07.428 --> 23:15.974 That's Mark Commode intercut with Liz Kershaw's film reviewer, Geoff Simpson, here on BBC Six Music, two directly oppositional views on the same film. 23:16.074 --> 23:17.215 I haven't seen it yet, have you? 23:17.795 --> 23:21.217 No, but the general vibe I get... Thumbs down. 23:21.497 --> 23:23.378 ...is towards Commode's point of view. 23:23.418 --> 23:25.260 Yeah, it's one or two star reviews, generally. 23:25.280 --> 23:29.042 It seems to me that Geoff Simpson is going out on a limb there for The Majesty of Mcgee. 23:29.082 --> 23:30.263 He was knocked out by it! 23:31.351 --> 23:33.112 I absolutely loved it! 23:33.452 --> 23:35.652 How do they do that when they go through the helicopters? 23:35.672 --> 23:37.013 I've never seen anything like that! 23:37.293 --> 23:38.933 Yeah, how do they do it? 23:39.053 --> 23:39.673 How's it done? 23:39.974 --> 23:43.175 I mean there's spits in there where you're thinking, how did they do that? 23:43.415 --> 23:52.017 And then there appear to be live dinosaurs in the film, a diplodocus and a T-Rex and it's jaw-dropping. 23:53.157 --> 23:57.839 Laura Dern interacts, she gets very close to the dinosaurs and then 23:58.919 --> 24:07.464 There appear to be explosions in space which is impossible because there's no oxygen in space and it was remarkable, absolutely remarkable. 24:07.484 --> 24:13.448 And then Philip Seymour Hoffman takes off his face and it turns out it's Tom Cruise wearing a mask. 24:13.748 --> 24:17.310 I mean my brain just melted and dribbled out through my nose. 24:20.973 --> 24:23.535 I mean, I'm sure, maybe he's right, maybe it's really good. 24:23.875 --> 24:30.442 They say that McG directed the dramatic scenes and he left the action up to the second unit. 24:30.882 --> 24:31.683 That's the rumour. 24:32.123 --> 24:34.946 So some people are saying that the action sequences are really good. 24:35.106 --> 24:37.649 This is Terminator Salvation we're talking about. 24:38.910 --> 24:40.350 So, you know, maybe it is quite good. 24:40.390 --> 24:41.851 He's a masterful director of drama. 24:42.091 --> 24:42.932 No one can question that. 24:42.952 --> 24:48.315 Yes, certainly the Charlie's Angels films were moving and engaging and very human. 24:50.416 --> 24:52.878 Mark Commode was spitting bullets there, wasn't he? 24:52.978 --> 24:54.038 He went completely nuts. 24:57.020 --> 24:57.941 Yeah, yeah, he was. 24:58.021 --> 24:58.922 He's good, Camode. 24:59.282 --> 25:00.823 He really puts his all into things. 25:00.903 --> 25:01.804 Can't mess with his quiff. 25:01.904 --> 25:02.504 He's a kind of chap. 25:02.524 --> 25:03.105 Jeff Simpson, though. 25:03.145 --> 25:03.925 That would be exciting. 25:03.946 --> 25:07.228 I'd like to be stunned by very basic special effects. 25:07.889 --> 25:10.451 It would make life more entertaining, wouldn't it? 25:10.511 --> 25:16.735 It's very patronising towards Mr Simpson, who's an experienced... Yeah, we're just riffing on a tiny little bit of his review. 25:16.755 --> 25:17.196 We don't know. 25:17.556 --> 25:18.797 It's out of context, isn't it? 25:18.897 --> 25:20.238 Yeah, it's totally out of context. 25:20.258 --> 25:21.119 That's how we like things. 25:21.559 --> 25:22.060 We like things. 25:22.700 --> 25:26.824 And then I couldn't believe it when a second Michael J. Fox walked into the room. 25:28.306 --> 25:31.549 Either they've got to look alike or I don't know what. 25:33.471 --> 25:37.415 There were seven Michael Keaton's all standing there. 25:37.555 --> 25:38.776 It was blowing my mind. 25:38.796 --> 25:42.700 And that's why Multiplicity is the best film I've seen this year. 25:43.701 --> 25:44.962 You got a free play here, right? 25:45.042 --> 25:47.923 Yeah, this is more from the Pictish Trails album, Secret Sounds. 25:47.983 --> 25:52.064 I played a track from this last week, and this is great. 25:52.084 --> 25:53.765 This is called Winter Home Disco. 25:54.425 --> 25:56.266 Jarvis Cocker there with Angela. 25:56.306 --> 25:58.687 That was released on the 17th of April. 25:58.727 --> 26:02.468 It's from his new album, Further Complications, released on May the 18th. 26:02.628 --> 26:07.530 Songs like that are a bit like those shops where they have key rings with people's names on it, you know? 26:07.971 --> 26:08.911 Personalised things. 26:09.151 --> 26:09.411 Yeah. 26:10.031 --> 26:11.592 There's a song for every name, isn't there? 26:11.912 --> 26:12.672 Almost, yeah. 26:12.872 --> 26:15.493 Because you can always guarantee, you know, a certain amount of sales. 26:16.513 --> 26:19.134 People called Angela, people going out with people called Angela. 26:19.174 --> 26:20.154 There's lots of Joe songs. 26:20.194 --> 26:21.814 I can't think of that many Adam songs. 26:22.574 --> 26:23.735 There must be an Adam song. 26:24.675 --> 26:25.775 Surely there's an Adam song. 26:25.815 --> 26:26.555 People can tell us. 26:27.476 --> 26:32.577 So listeners, you're tuned into the Adam and Joe program on 6 Music, by the way, in case you didn't realize. 26:33.237 --> 26:35.357 I'm going to talk, I'm going to get something off my chest now. 26:35.377 --> 26:36.498 I've had a difficult week, right? 26:36.518 --> 26:38.358 I've been working hard doing this sitcom. 26:38.778 --> 26:42.642 Incidentally, thanks so much for coming along if you came to the taping in Teddington on Thursday. 26:43.583 --> 26:47.407 The tapings go on for another four weeks and you're welcome to join us if you want. 26:48.608 --> 26:50.971 You can probably find out details on the blog. 26:51.011 --> 26:55.355 We might put some links to how you can get hold of tickets for the taping of this sitcom I'm doing. 26:56.176 --> 27:11.251 But I got home yesterday having picked up a hire car, right, from the production company, which makes it easier for me to get home after this show to go to Norfolk and then spend some time with my family before getting back to rehearsals and stuff. 27:11.852 --> 27:15.195 I got back to where I was staying in South London. 27:16.076 --> 27:20.337 Uh, parked the car, went in to get the visitor's permit, right? 27:20.417 --> 27:27.119 Because I'd specially gone out to Lambeth Council, bought some visitor's permit books, go in to get my visitor's permit, fill it out, come out. 27:27.619 --> 27:28.379 What do you think's happening? 27:29.260 --> 27:29.880 Toad away? 27:30.220 --> 27:31.180 No, ticket. 27:31.680 --> 27:33.121 He's finishing writing the ticket. 27:33.461 --> 27:35.221 He's just popped it in the system there. 27:35.501 --> 27:36.922 How long had you been parked outside for? 27:38.262 --> 27:40.523 Well, he told me how long it was. 27:40.563 --> 27:42.683 He'd been observing the car for two and a half minutes. 27:43.024 --> 27:43.964 Two and a half minutes? 27:43.984 --> 27:44.164 Yeah. 27:44.884 --> 27:47.006 So, how do you think I dealt with the situation? 27:48.266 --> 27:51.108 I would have... He's put it in the thing, has he? 27:51.148 --> 27:52.189 He's punched it in the thing. 27:52.249 --> 27:52.869 Punched it in the thing. 27:53.030 --> 27:56.012 I'm extremely tired, I'm absolutely exhausted. 27:56.332 --> 28:07.779 I have made a point of going in and having the parking book standing by, got it specially from Lambeth Council, come out, slapped a ticket on me in an empty street for being parked out there for two and a half minutes. 28:07.799 --> 28:08.120 Time of day? 28:08.600 --> 28:09.380 Time of day, it was 5.45. 28:09.861 --> 28:12.583 So, only 45 minutes left on restrictions anyway. 28:15.385 --> 28:17.867 I would warrant you flipped your flippin' flipper. 28:18.307 --> 28:18.687 Weird. 28:18.928 --> 28:20.189 I did exactly that. 28:20.369 --> 28:23.171 I went absolutely nuts, right? 28:23.692 --> 28:24.993 And I just totally lost my temper. 28:25.033 --> 28:33.961 And I should say at this point before I go any further that I was very ashamed and still am very ashamed of how angry I got and how I dealt with the situation, right? 28:34.501 --> 28:37.364 I'm in no way glorifying anything I did thereafter. 28:37.724 --> 28:39.285 I behaved like an idiot whole. 28:39.546 --> 28:39.746 Right. 28:40.106 --> 28:42.807 And it made me feel really bad and still does talking about it. 28:42.847 --> 28:43.668 What did you do? 28:43.708 --> 28:44.508 Do what you did. 28:44.608 --> 28:46.189 I thought I should confess, right? 28:46.209 --> 28:48.830 I'm using this show as a means of confession. 28:49.590 --> 28:52.351 So I went nuts, got really angry and said, what are you doing? 28:52.371 --> 28:53.792 I've been out here for two minutes. 28:54.352 --> 28:58.914 And he's like, well, you've been out here for longer than two minutes because I've been observing the car for two and a half minutes. 28:58.934 --> 29:02.255 It's like, ah, this is... But he didn't tell me this for quite some time. 29:02.315 --> 29:07.958 His default reaction to me getting angry was getting right back up in my grill as well, right? 29:08.738 --> 29:09.819 which doesn't usually happen. 29:09.939 --> 29:13.923 Usually the parking attendants and they, it should be said, they do do a very difficult job. 29:14.043 --> 29:19.067 Usually they remain incredibly impassive, almost to the extent that it makes it even worse for you. 29:19.087 --> 29:21.390 You get even angrier because you want a human reaction from them. 29:21.810 --> 29:26.935 But this guy, he got right back up in my face and very quickly, and it sort of escalated, right? 29:26.975 --> 29:28.256 This, this contratone. 29:28.556 --> 29:34.902 I was very careful not to be physically threatening or anything like that, but no, I should say, you know, I was really... You didn't hit him. 29:35.402 --> 29:45.508 I didn't touch him because you don't want anything like that to start happening in those situations because it can easily get out of hand. 29:45.628 --> 29:51.312 I was really careful not to swear at him or do any of that kind of stuff, but I was absolutely mad. 29:51.372 --> 29:53.013 I was really hopping bananas. 29:53.853 --> 29:57.435 And he, at one stage, I think I called him a disgrace, right? 29:57.635 --> 29:59.495 I said, you're a disgrace. 29:59.916 --> 30:00.736 You're not doing a good job. 30:00.816 --> 30:05.018 What was your angle that he's not doing a good job, that he's being overly officious? 30:05.098 --> 30:05.578 Yeah, yeah, yeah. 30:05.618 --> 30:06.778 It's like, what's the point? 30:07.119 --> 30:07.959 What do you think you're doing? 30:07.979 --> 30:09.259 What do you think the point of your job is? 30:09.359 --> 30:11.200 Isn't it to keep traffic flowing? 30:11.540 --> 30:16.422 Isn't it to make sure that roads are not being obstructed by poor parking? 30:16.883 --> 30:17.923 I am doing my best. 30:18.223 --> 30:35.974 I'm bending over backwards to comply with the regulations here in an empty street, parking outside my own residence, and I'm getting these visitor's parking permits and I'm being penalised, and there's absolutely no accountability from the parking wardens. 30:36.614 --> 30:39.917 Of course, it's not the individual wardens' attendance fall. 30:39.977 --> 30:41.017 He's just doing his job. 30:41.057 --> 30:43.339 But when they say, I'm just doing my job, 30:43.999 --> 30:45.740 That is not the thing you wanna hear. 30:45.940 --> 30:47.221 That just makes you even madder. 30:47.741 --> 30:55.345 So it was all getting totally out of hand, this situation, you know, and all these cliches were going back and forth and this, and I called him a disgrace or something. 30:55.745 --> 30:57.966 And then he used the N-word, right? 30:58.507 --> 31:02.689 And he said, like in hip-hop parlance, N-word please, you know? 31:03.089 --> 31:04.170 He said that to me. 31:04.550 --> 31:06.051 And I thought that was a bit off, right? 31:06.491 --> 31:12.094 And even though I wasn't offended by it, of course, I just thought, I'm gonna use this as ammunition. 31:12.834 --> 31:13.154 Nice. 31:13.314 --> 31:15.575 And I'm going to say, that's a racial slur. 31:15.835 --> 31:17.015 That's a racial epithet. 31:17.476 --> 31:20.116 How dare you use that kind of offensive terminology? 31:20.797 --> 31:21.017 Right? 31:21.397 --> 31:22.497 So it was all getting lower. 31:22.517 --> 31:22.577 Wow. 31:22.617 --> 31:23.818 What a contemporary situation. 31:23.878 --> 31:24.638 It was really bad. 31:24.658 --> 31:25.698 It's like the film Crash. 31:26.038 --> 31:26.398 Exactly. 31:26.418 --> 31:27.659 It was exactly like Crash. 31:28.379 --> 31:29.139 But I've never seen. 31:29.840 --> 31:35.121 But I was just fuming, you know, and all rationality and reasonability had gone out of the equation. 31:35.261 --> 31:35.821 Reasonality. 31:36.122 --> 31:37.422 Reasonality is the correct word. 31:37.802 --> 31:48.690 And then a colleague of his came along on a scooter and tried to calm, and it was very professional, tried to calm the situation down, both parties, and saying to his colleague, you know, step away, just leave. 31:48.890 --> 31:49.911 So what's the conclusion? 31:50.512 --> 31:51.973 Did he retract the ticket? 31:52.013 --> 31:52.093 No. 31:52.113 --> 31:52.633 Of course not. 31:52.693 --> 31:54.214 No, he can't once he's punched it into the system. 31:54.234 --> 31:57.116 Yeah, he just says, if you want to appeal, you can appeal to the council. 31:57.257 --> 31:57.657 Thanks very much. 31:57.677 --> 31:58.818 Who would you think won then? 31:59.338 --> 32:04.820 I would say he probably did because I behaved like such an idiot, because here's the thing, I went further, right? 32:05.000 --> 32:06.981 What do you think I did there? 32:07.401 --> 32:16.544 Well, instead of letting it go at that point, which any sane human being would threaten some kind of, you know, going to superiors, I went and I got my digital camera. 32:17.133 --> 32:18.294 Oh, you took a photo of him. 32:18.314 --> 32:25.217 No, I put it on filming mode and I followed him down the street chatting to him about why he thought it was a good idea to penalize people. 32:25.597 --> 32:27.398 And I was very calm at that point, right? 32:27.798 --> 32:29.079 It wasn't out of hand anymore. 32:29.899 --> 32:32.681 And so I was just chatting to him, but obviously he didn't like being filmed. 32:32.701 --> 32:32.741 No. 32:33.601 --> 32:38.044 And then an Australian man on a bike stopped and said to me, like, leave him alone. 32:38.064 --> 32:38.604 What are you doing? 32:38.784 --> 32:39.024 Yeah. 32:39.445 --> 32:43.587 And at that moment, I caught myself like I realized what I was doing. 32:43.667 --> 32:43.908 Wow. 32:44.028 --> 32:44.928 And I felt insane. 32:45.168 --> 32:48.610 But then the Australian man said, well, you can afford to pay the ticket, can't you? 32:48.831 --> 32:50.452 I just thought that's not the point at all. 32:51.172 --> 32:54.774 He can't, you know, people aren't being penalised just because they can afford to pay things. 32:54.794 --> 32:55.674 This is totally unfair. 32:55.995 --> 32:59.216 But obviously I realised that what I was doing was absolutely insane. 32:59.256 --> 32:59.716 The filming? 32:59.937 --> 33:00.577 Yeah. 33:00.617 --> 33:03.458 What would you have planned to have done with the film? 33:03.518 --> 33:04.059 I don't know. 33:04.319 --> 33:04.819 YouTube? 33:04.839 --> 33:06.580 I mean, you've got a successful YouTube channel. 33:06.860 --> 33:08.121 Was that not in the back of your mind? 33:08.161 --> 33:08.581 Possibly. 33:08.661 --> 33:11.563 I'm going to use my YouTube channel for vigilante justice. 33:11.583 --> 33:13.003 Yeah, possibly I was thinking that. 33:13.524 --> 33:15.385 Possibly I just wanted to wind him up a bit, you know? 33:16.405 --> 33:18.287 But whatever I was doing, it was very bad. 33:18.667 --> 33:24.132 It's very contemporary, the surveillance society who's watching who, you know, survey the surveillance. 33:24.412 --> 33:24.932 Right. 33:25.373 --> 33:32.699 But the nice thing about it was that it had a kind of calming effect, and especially after the Australian interfering man had gone. 33:33.360 --> 33:33.640 Right. 33:33.920 --> 33:35.381 He wasn't on my side. 33:35.502 --> 33:37.763 When he cycled up, I thought, oh, yes, he's going to be on my side. 33:37.803 --> 33:39.005 Swampy's going to be on my side. 33:39.665 --> 33:40.225 And he wasn't. 33:40.265 --> 33:41.366 I was a bit miffed about that. 33:41.966 --> 33:42.847 Swampy. 33:43.327 --> 33:44.688 He had big dreadlocks like Swampy. 33:45.148 --> 33:47.089 So we all calmed down. 33:47.189 --> 33:49.511 And in the end it turned into quite a beautiful loving. 33:49.811 --> 33:50.131 Really? 33:50.151 --> 33:50.371 Yeah. 33:50.451 --> 33:51.492 I said, listen, I'm sorry. 33:51.572 --> 33:52.513 I erased the film. 33:53.033 --> 33:54.194 I shook hands with the guy. 33:54.914 --> 33:57.015 The guy said, listen, you seem like a nice guy. 33:57.095 --> 33:59.437 If we met under other circumstances, I bet we'd get on. 34:00.197 --> 34:03.778 And I wasn't sure about that, but he was nice, actually. 34:03.818 --> 34:04.499 He was pretty nice. 34:04.539 --> 34:05.359 And he calmed down. 34:05.419 --> 34:06.099 I calmed down. 34:06.159 --> 34:07.240 I said, I'm so sorry. 34:07.260 --> 34:08.040 I got so angry. 34:08.640 --> 34:13.602 I tried to explain why I got so furious, you know, and he tried to explain his point of view. 34:14.103 --> 34:15.903 In the end, it was it was quite beautiful. 34:16.383 --> 34:19.945 And we made sweet, sweet love in the street there on the street. 34:19.965 --> 34:20.045 Wow. 34:20.345 --> 34:24.811 No, but I came out of it very shaken because I thought I'd behaved so appallingly. 34:25.072 --> 34:25.653 Back in the house. 34:25.713 --> 34:26.954 I was really ashamed. 34:27.275 --> 34:28.216 I was very ashamed. 34:28.496 --> 34:32.402 And I would like to know for Texanation today, this is the longest build up to Texanation ever. 34:32.682 --> 34:35.446 For Texanation today, I would be keen to hear about other 34:36.367 --> 34:39.630 confrontations that have just shown you in the worst light. 34:40.030 --> 34:40.490 Like how? 34:40.550 --> 34:41.511 Well, you've taken it too far. 34:41.531 --> 34:44.433 You've taken it way too far and you've dealt with it way too badly. 34:44.734 --> 34:51.999 Obviously famous public examples of this are Peter Buck on the plane and it happens on planes a lot, doesn't it? 34:52.099 --> 34:54.681 Air rage. 34:54.741 --> 34:57.804 But those are things that have, you know, they've ended up going to prison. 34:57.844 --> 35:00.766 We don't really want to hear things as extreme as that. 35:00.986 --> 35:03.028 But this specifically, you felt you were in the right. 35:03.388 --> 35:06.511 and then your own emotions put you squarely in the wrong. 35:06.531 --> 35:08.993 I just behaved like a Wally, solidly for half an hour, yeah. 35:09.453 --> 35:10.234 And I was ashamed. 35:10.834 --> 35:15.118 So I would like to hear similar stories from other people so I don't feel so alone. 35:15.138 --> 35:15.959 Solid Wally. 35:16.319 --> 35:18.020 Solid half hour of walliness. 35:18.561 --> 35:20.442 Right, let's play some music right now, listeners. 35:21.303 --> 35:23.525 We have got Florence and the Machine, right? 35:23.825 --> 35:24.866 Yeah, this is Rabbit Heart. 35:24.906 --> 35:25.707 Brackets, raise it up. 35:26.681 --> 35:29.764 That is Eels with Hey Man, Now You're Really Living. 35:29.804 --> 35:34.988 That's taken from their 2005 album, Blinking Lights and Other Revelations, which is a wonderful album. 35:35.048 --> 35:37.390 If you don't have it already, you should go out and invest in it. 35:37.830 --> 35:41.153 Of course, he's got a new album out, Ombre Lobo, 12 Songs of Desire. 35:41.613 --> 35:46.077 Also very enjoyable, very good half hour little documentary DVD you get free with that as well. 35:46.117 --> 35:47.158 They're doing that a lot these days. 35:47.218 --> 35:48.499 I love a little free DVD. 35:48.539 --> 35:49.580 Love a little free DVD. 35:50.100 --> 35:54.903 I bought the massive Neil Young Blu-ray box set for my girlfriend this week. 35:54.923 --> 35:56.023 That's the one you're supposed to get. 35:56.063 --> 35:58.004 You get loads of extra stuff on there, right? 35:58.444 --> 36:01.246 Nine Blu-ray discs. 36:01.686 --> 36:02.186 200 pounds. 36:02.206 --> 36:03.927 200 pounds? 36:03.947 --> 36:06.168 I made it very clear she knew exactly what it cost. 36:06.568 --> 36:09.290 I waited about two hours from the presentation to slip in. 36:09.310 --> 36:10.270 Do you know how much it cost? 36:10.290 --> 36:11.571 200 pounds. 36:11.611 --> 36:13.232 It's two hours enough time? 36:13.792 --> 36:14.152 Wow. 36:14.673 --> 36:15.374 That's a long time. 36:15.434 --> 36:15.774 Well done. 36:15.794 --> 36:17.395 I would have done it within the first 10 minutes. 36:17.936 --> 36:18.236 I know. 36:18.336 --> 36:21.439 Well, I was really having to hold it in for that period. 36:21.459 --> 36:21.999 It was painful. 36:22.159 --> 36:24.702 I would have said, here's the receipt in case you want to take it back. 36:25.102 --> 36:25.362 Yes. 36:25.462 --> 36:25.723 Nice. 36:25.763 --> 36:26.583 That's a good tactic. 36:26.603 --> 36:27.644 Look at the receipt. 36:28.065 --> 36:28.925 I mean, it's a big box. 36:28.945 --> 36:29.706 Have you seen the box? 36:29.786 --> 36:30.026 Sure. 36:30.186 --> 36:30.827 It's got Neil Young. 36:30.867 --> 36:31.948 It's like he's painted it himself. 36:32.028 --> 36:34.350 It's very beautifully crafted, but it's quite empty. 36:34.390 --> 36:37.313 It reminded me of the Coco electric box. 36:37.933 --> 36:38.693 What's that cocoa? 36:38.913 --> 36:40.494 Oh, on The Apprentice. 36:40.514 --> 36:40.834 Yeah. 36:41.394 --> 36:42.855 It's got three different draws. 36:44.215 --> 36:45.615 And you lift them out of the box. 36:45.775 --> 36:46.476 What were the draws? 36:46.536 --> 36:49.236 It was for him, for her and to fight about. 36:49.256 --> 36:50.137 No, to share. 36:50.277 --> 36:52.778 It started off being to fight about and then it turned into to share. 36:53.018 --> 36:53.278 Right. 36:53.458 --> 36:54.778 It's a smear all over your face. 36:55.298 --> 37:01.540 But in draw number one of Neil's Nutty Box is the nine Blu-ray DVDs that basically don't take up a lot of space. 37:01.740 --> 37:01.940 Right. 37:02.200 --> 37:03.381 I mean, nine DVDs. 37:03.501 --> 37:04.001 What's that like? 37:04.402 --> 37:07.288 Two inches in width, not a lot of space. 37:07.689 --> 37:08.571 They're in draw number one. 37:08.931 --> 37:10.775 In draw number two is a beautiful book. 37:11.216 --> 37:11.397 Right. 37:11.617 --> 37:14.804 A sort of leather bound Neil scrapbook. 37:15.362 --> 37:17.204 with lyrics and nuggets. 37:17.224 --> 37:18.465 Neil Young, Neil from the Young Ones. 37:19.566 --> 37:21.007 No, a Neil Young scrapbook. 37:21.948 --> 37:23.549 And in the third draw... Is Neil. 37:24.250 --> 37:25.231 That would be nice, wouldn't it? 37:25.251 --> 37:26.152 A bit of Neil's beard. 37:27.053 --> 37:28.954 Or some old faggons and bottles. 37:28.994 --> 37:30.335 An old doobie. 37:30.996 --> 37:37.382 No, what it's got is a pad, a notepad rattling around in it. 37:37.642 --> 37:39.904 I think there might be one or two, but there's basically not very much in it. 37:39.924 --> 37:40.925 What's the notepad for? 37:40.985 --> 37:43.587 Well, it says it's some kind of Neil Young fan in joke. 37:43.667 --> 37:44.548 I don't understand it. 37:44.608 --> 37:46.870 It's like this is a pad for writing thoughts. 37:46.890 --> 37:47.911 It has written on it. 37:48.531 --> 37:53.355 But what's the point of thoughts if you haven't got a pad or something, something like that? 37:53.576 --> 37:57.219 Well, I like Neil Young and that goes over my head. 37:57.279 --> 38:01.843 But it just seemed a bit like they were trying, you know, like when you buy a really expensive bit of software. 38:02.443 --> 38:05.365 And it's just a CD, but yet they package it in an enormous box. 38:05.385 --> 38:07.666 Giant box to make it seem physically worth the money. 38:07.766 --> 38:08.087 Of course. 38:08.107 --> 38:09.127 It seemed a bit like that. 38:09.227 --> 38:09.468 Right. 38:09.948 --> 38:12.610 What are we going to do with the blooming Neil Young thing? 38:12.670 --> 38:13.810 It's impossible to store. 38:13.910 --> 38:14.811 It's huge. 38:14.851 --> 38:15.051 Yeah. 38:15.511 --> 38:19.194 I mean, it looks good at the moment, but how much longer can it hang around the front room? 38:19.214 --> 38:21.876 You have to have a separate shelf built for box sets. 38:22.336 --> 38:24.097 You really do a weird shaped shelf. 38:24.277 --> 38:25.318 That's no good, man. 38:25.678 --> 38:25.998 Yeah. 38:26.038 --> 38:26.959 I don't like things like that. 38:27.239 --> 38:31.121 Listen, when I started talking, I had somewhere to go, but I've just got lost. 38:31.281 --> 38:36.664 Well, we were going to talk about The Apprentice, but let's play some more music and find out what happened with your Margaret Madison song. 38:37.025 --> 38:38.125 Here's a free play, though, right now. 38:38.165 --> 38:44.529 This is my special free play for my mum that I like to do every week, or at least I try to do to keep my mum happy. 38:44.929 --> 38:46.030 This is Roy Rogers. 38:46.310 --> 38:46.990 Hope you like this one. 38:47.010 --> 38:49.832 He was a cowboy man, but he had a sideline in singing. 38:49.872 --> 38:51.273 Does your mum like any modern music? 38:51.813 --> 38:52.854 Well, she does, actually. 38:52.914 --> 38:54.776 Yes, she does. 38:54.816 --> 38:56.537 I should play some modern music for my mum, shouldn't I? 38:56.557 --> 38:57.018 This is good, though. 38:57.198 --> 38:58.699 So this is a song by a cowboy. 38:58.779 --> 39:00.180 I don't even know if she likes this one. 39:01.441 --> 39:04.264 But I thought maybe she did, because it's really intriguing. 39:04.824 --> 39:12.731 Even though it's very old, I think it was early 50s, it's got some amazingly odd harmonies and stuff and key changes and things in there. 39:12.811 --> 39:13.772 Hope you like this, Mum. 39:14.052 --> 39:16.414 This is Roy Rogers with Tumbling Tumbleweeds. 39:20.656 --> 39:22.477 That sounds almost Disney-esque, doesn't it? 39:22.517 --> 39:26.859 There's something very soothing about the quality of vocals recorded around that period. 39:26.939 --> 39:28.699 Yes, it must have been earlier than the 50s, I guess. 39:29.039 --> 39:34.341 It sounds as if the world is just a more comfortable and sound-absorbing place. 39:34.641 --> 39:35.162 Definitely. 39:35.242 --> 39:36.882 Sort of more soft furnishings around. 39:37.482 --> 39:39.363 Not so many hard edges. 39:39.463 --> 39:40.384 Not too much echoes. 39:40.444 --> 39:41.224 Not too much chrome. 39:41.684 --> 39:41.984 Yes. 39:42.625 --> 39:43.386 Yes, Adam, yes. 39:44.667 --> 39:44.988 Yes. 39:45.869 --> 39:47.350 When in doubt, just be very positive. 39:48.211 --> 39:54.538 Listen, so regular listeners might know that on the Song Wars thing we do the other week, we did Apprentice-themed songs. 39:54.959 --> 39:58.503 Adam did a song that accused all the contestants of being idiots. 39:58.643 --> 39:59.144 Morons. 39:59.304 --> 40:01.746 Morons and repeated it over and over again, and he was stupid. 40:02.267 --> 40:02.888 He's a stupid moron. 40:02.908 --> 40:03.508 That's a good song. 40:03.889 --> 40:11.176 But he was upset when a word came that they were going to choose my Margaret Mountford song maybe to play on The Apprentice You're Fired. 40:11.336 --> 40:12.137 I wasn't that upset. 40:12.257 --> 40:13.198 I was pleased for you, man. 40:13.238 --> 40:13.839 You were furious. 40:13.859 --> 40:14.679 I was a little bit angry. 40:15.440 --> 40:19.945 And so basically I waited with bated breath last Sunday evening 40:20.866 --> 40:23.508 pretty sure that this time they were going to use the song. 40:23.548 --> 40:29.954 As you know, my aspirations to have my song or song used on television have been thwarted how many times? 40:30.034 --> 40:30.795 Thrice. 40:30.815 --> 40:31.496 Well, both of ours. 40:31.576 --> 40:32.917 Antics Roadshow, they promised. 40:32.997 --> 40:34.038 It was a no-show. 40:34.298 --> 40:35.119 What was the one with you? 40:36.120 --> 40:36.841 Biff Baffboth. 40:37.241 --> 40:41.225 Biff Baffboth, they were going to use on the celebrity sister show. 40:41.325 --> 40:43.227 I think that was one more, but I forgot what it was. 40:43.767 --> 40:49.692 So we had emails from people who'd been in the audience of the record of the You've Been Fired final. 40:49.712 --> 40:50.693 That's not what it's called. 40:51.274 --> 40:52.274 You're Fired final. 40:53.315 --> 40:54.516 And they said yes, they played it in. 40:54.857 --> 40:55.937 Yes, Margaret, listen to it. 40:56.398 --> 41:01.923 So I was pretty sure, you know, it still seemed unlikely, but I thought this time it was going to happen. 41:02.083 --> 41:02.303 Yeah. 41:02.743 --> 41:05.606 Pretty much the whole weekend I was waiting for Sunday evening. 41:05.686 --> 41:06.166 Same here. 41:06.566 --> 41:08.888 I pretty much didn't really care about the result of The Apprentice. 41:08.928 --> 41:11.070 I was just solely focused on my song. 41:12.211 --> 41:14.613 I was trying to pretend I wasn't as well in the front room at home. 41:14.633 --> 41:18.435 We had some friends watching as well with us and I was trying to be very cool. 41:18.535 --> 41:24.019 I was particularly slouched in an overly relaxed way to try and give off the signals that I didn't really care. 41:24.919 --> 41:28.402 And so that I looked unfazed if they didn't play. 41:28.762 --> 41:30.943 I'm just going to the kitchen guys. 41:30.983 --> 41:32.765 I'm not interested in this program. 41:32.805 --> 41:34.506 I'm going to the kitchen to get something quickly. 41:34.786 --> 41:35.366 Quickly come back. 41:35.426 --> 41:36.027 Something really quickly. 41:37.267 --> 41:40.169 And so my stomach was turning little cartwheels. 41:40.689 --> 41:41.969 My heart was pitter-pattering. 41:42.430 --> 41:44.130 There were little butterflies in my stomach. 41:44.230 --> 41:46.051 Mine was as well, and it wasn't even my song. 41:46.091 --> 41:46.211 Really? 41:47.272 --> 41:47.892 This could be big. 41:48.112 --> 41:52.534 I had some fantasies in my head about, you know, the consequences of what would happen if they did use it. 41:53.014 --> 41:57.896 This is the kind of thing, I tried to repress it, but I couldn't help thinking, YouTube smash? 41:58.477 --> 42:00.297 Massive, at least a massive YouTube smash. 42:00.337 --> 42:03.799 I mean, I'll probably be up all night watching the numbers rocket on the YouTube video. 42:04.399 --> 42:08.344 And maybe I'll get a call from a record company and it's gonna be a single. 42:08.464 --> 42:08.984 Demi Moore. 42:09.064 --> 42:10.506 That'll make Adam really angry. 42:10.626 --> 42:12.408 It's gonna be a hit signal. 42:14.250 --> 42:15.552 Demi Moore, you think she might have got it done? 42:15.572 --> 42:18.054 Well, because she got into the whole Susan Boyle thing, didn't she? 42:18.074 --> 42:19.155 She never turned up, though, did she? 42:19.196 --> 42:21.058 They said she was gonna turn up for the final, but she didn't. 42:21.158 --> 42:23.961 She sent a personal message of support, I think. 42:24.461 --> 42:30.186 Anyway, the program started and up came the bit when I thought they'd play it. 42:30.306 --> 42:34.009 It was a little montage about how The Apprentice had impacted in the media. 42:34.749 --> 42:36.851 And no, there was no song. 42:36.931 --> 42:39.693 There was a clip of TV Burt with Harry Hill being very funny. 42:39.913 --> 42:41.614 And some online sort of Lego man. 42:41.654 --> 42:44.837 Some very funny YouTube animation someone had done with Lego man. 42:45.097 --> 42:45.657 Cornballs. 42:45.737 --> 42:46.438 No cornballs. 42:46.498 --> 42:47.638 So I thought, well, that's probably it. 42:47.698 --> 42:48.319 That's probably it. 42:48.579 --> 42:50.860 But then I realised they hadn't announced that Margaret was leaving. 42:51.060 --> 42:54.442 I thought, ah, well, they're saving it for the big... Got loads of big montage. 42:54.582 --> 42:55.562 Sure. 42:55.922 --> 43:00.985 But, you know, anyone who actually watched it will know that they didn't use it in the end at all. 43:01.065 --> 43:01.685 I couldn't believe it. 43:01.925 --> 43:05.367 And even right till the end, I was thinking, maybe they'll play it over the closing titles. 43:05.387 --> 43:07.708 Well, they launched a little montage of Margaret, didn't they? 43:07.728 --> 43:09.749 And they started playing what, the national anthem? 43:10.249 --> 43:10.589 That's right. 43:10.609 --> 43:12.310 They were just a regal angle. 43:12.410 --> 43:13.271 Regal angle. 43:13.431 --> 43:16.113 And I mean, to be honest, I was disappointed. 43:16.533 --> 43:19.995 However, it has to be said that watching the show and the slickness they're in. 43:20.875 --> 43:27.659 Well, you realize they've got, I mean, for funny songs, they've got the Pants Man song and they've got enough stuff to go into for every single contestant. 43:27.739 --> 43:32.402 And then, you know, the winner, the person who came second, Sir Allen was turning up. 43:32.422 --> 43:35.324 No disrespect, but your song would have sounded a little bit special needs. 43:35.364 --> 43:36.805 It would have sounded really odd. 43:37.245 --> 43:40.326 You know, you have to contextualize stuff in TV, you're right. 43:40.346 --> 43:42.807 They would have actually said who I am, what the show is. 43:43.187 --> 43:46.628 They would have had to say what Song Wars was to understand it. 43:46.688 --> 43:49.089 Otherwise, I would have been this weird, wittering man. 43:49.529 --> 43:55.971 If it had been a sort of directly, explicitly funny song, you know, like that, you know, sort of Chaz and Dave, then 43:56.371 --> 44:01.932 But because it was so sophisticated and elegant, it would have scrambled people's brainiums. 44:02.312 --> 44:02.852 But she heard it. 44:02.892 --> 44:03.572 That's the main thing. 44:03.752 --> 44:14.474 Yeah, well, we've got an email here, listen, from a listener called Andrew Petty, who says, I sort of know Margaret through my job writing about TV and radio for The Daily Telegraph. 44:14.774 --> 44:16.874 She's been writing a weekly column about the apprentice in the paper. 44:17.115 --> 44:19.655 The last time we spoke, I told her about your song and sent her a link. 44:19.935 --> 44:25.336 She had a bit of trouble downloading the full version, but Margaret said that the bit she had listened to, the bit. 44:25.996 --> 44:28.638 Sanded nice and quotes rather gentle. 44:30.879 --> 44:31.620 That's very nice. 44:31.640 --> 44:41.226 I thought that Margaret's positive appraisal might offer you, if not a bag full, then at least a quantum of solace after those nit-twits at television centre cruelly thwarted your primetime TV animation once again. 44:41.286 --> 44:41.966 That's a nice email. 44:41.986 --> 44:42.526 Thanks Andrew. 44:43.107 --> 44:43.627 Thanks Andrew. 44:43.667 --> 44:46.309 But I would say, what was it? 44:46.349 --> 44:47.209 Positive comments. 44:47.289 --> 44:49.631 I would say positive is too strong a word for her comments. 44:50.271 --> 44:51.212 Nice and gentle. 44:51.412 --> 44:53.954 Had a bit of trouble downloading the full version. 44:54.634 --> 44:55.395 What does that mean? 44:55.435 --> 44:57.797 How can you have trouble downloading something on YouTube? 44:57.837 --> 44:59.579 Well, you get bored, and then you stop. 45:00.279 --> 45:01.080 You get frightened by it. 45:01.100 --> 45:01.901 And you do something else. 45:07.659 --> 45:08.900 That's Franz Ferdinand. 45:09.120 --> 45:10.661 They're so hot right now! 45:11.161 --> 45:12.502 With no you girls. 45:12.962 --> 45:14.403 Adam and Jo here on Six Music. 45:14.443 --> 45:15.504 Nice to be with you listeners. 45:15.564 --> 45:23.329 Yeah and it's Text the Nation time and here's a superb new jingle for Text the Nation that has been created by John Griffin from Dublin. 45:23.409 --> 45:24.470 Get your ears round this. 45:27.812 --> 45:30.516 It doesn't matter 45:44.844 --> 45:49.628 I like that one because it sounds like some very sweet people trying to act like yobs. 45:49.728 --> 45:52.070 It's very aggressive and violent and dystopian. 45:52.830 --> 45:57.153 John says it started out as an homage to NWA but ended up sounding more like Public Enemy. 45:57.774 --> 46:01.036 I know what you're thinking but no, it's not Chuck D lending his vocals to the track. 46:01.096 --> 46:07.802 I was unable to secure the talents of any Public Enemy member so instead it's me doing the vocals with some very precise pitch shifting applied. 46:08.502 --> 46:09.503 That's good, man. 46:09.563 --> 46:10.463 You know what it reminded me of? 46:10.543 --> 46:11.224 He says something else. 46:11.264 --> 46:15.166 And don't worry, the scratching's from a sample, so I haven't damaged my dad's record player. 46:15.727 --> 46:16.247 There we go. 46:16.827 --> 46:20.149 Now, it reminds me a little bit of the anti-piracy song. 46:22.151 --> 46:22.611 Yes. 46:25.613 --> 46:29.475 That same kind of thing with sirens going off and windows smashing and people stealing. 46:30.236 --> 46:31.236 Society's breaking down. 46:31.256 --> 46:31.336 Yeah. 46:32.737 --> 46:32.997 Yeah. 46:33.097 --> 46:39.862 Well, and it's apt for this textination, which is all about kind of arguments or confrontations that have got out of hand. 46:39.902 --> 46:41.863 No, that's not really a good description, is it? 46:42.363 --> 46:43.784 Sort of civic confrontations. 46:43.824 --> 46:49.588 Well, I was telling a story before about my latest contraton with the traffic ward, and I like to have one at least once a year. 46:50.228 --> 46:53.531 And I just ended up feeling that I'd behaved like an absolute idiot whole. 46:53.551 --> 46:57.093 Yeah, overreacting, I suppose, getting getting getting inappropriately angry. 46:57.313 --> 46:58.974 in some kind of a situation. 46:59.294 --> 47:01.136 And it escalates and you just end up being a massive wally. 47:01.156 --> 47:01.876 It'll become clear. 47:01.896 --> 47:03.417 Here's one from Brian E. King. 47:03.897 --> 47:04.938 I had him and Joe many years ago. 47:04.958 --> 47:06.139 I was in a very crowded bar. 47:06.479 --> 47:08.180 I was a little drunk, which didn't help matters. 47:08.600 --> 47:14.024 My ex-boyfriend had bought me a pint, but when he tried to hand it to me, he tripped and spilled the whole thing in my lap. 47:14.404 --> 47:19.187 I was so furious, I went to buy a replacement, then tipped the whole thing in his lap on purpose. 47:19.207 --> 47:19.487 What? 47:20.068 --> 47:21.869 Unsurprisingly, he was extremely upset with me. 47:21.909 --> 47:23.490 I was very embarrassed about this story. 47:23.830 --> 47:24.791 And I am even now. 47:25.291 --> 47:26.151 That's terrible. 47:26.191 --> 47:27.832 I wonder if they split up after that. 47:27.852 --> 47:29.092 It's an overreaction, isn't it? 47:29.112 --> 47:29.672 How would you deal with that? 47:29.692 --> 47:29.992 It must be fun. 47:30.012 --> 47:31.493 I've never thrown a drink at someone. 47:32.093 --> 47:32.853 Well, good for you. 47:32.893 --> 47:33.713 I don't like to do that. 47:33.873 --> 47:40.074 Stuff like that, stuff like clearing all this, getting in an argument and clearing, sweeping your arm across the surface of a table or a mantelpiece. 47:40.115 --> 47:41.335 We've discussed this before. 47:41.655 --> 47:44.255 Those kind of grand movie style gestures of fury. 47:44.696 --> 47:45.316 I've never done them. 47:45.336 --> 47:46.076 I'd like to do them. 47:46.796 --> 47:49.497 Do you mind if I can I have permission to throw a drink in your face? 47:50.298 --> 47:53.799 At some point in the next couple of weeks and that you can do it at Glastonbury. 47:53.939 --> 47:54.259 Can I? 47:54.379 --> 47:59.762 Yeah, really get really furious Let's let's arrange your time to hook up with some black squadron members, right? 47:59.802 --> 48:00.982 And I'll throw a drink in your face. 48:01.002 --> 48:05.324 You can throw a drink in my face What if we have a sort of makeshift mantle piece with stuff on it or a table? 48:05.444 --> 48:09.946 Let's have a desk you can sweep the you can be so furious at the drink You just sweep the stuff off the table. 48:10.026 --> 48:10.366 Love it. 48:10.526 --> 48:13.648 People will love it cuz that's the kind of thing that gets into films. 48:13.828 --> 48:14.528 It's true, isn't it? 48:14.688 --> 48:17.349 Yeah, if you do that kind of thing, you know what you're doing is important. 48:17.389 --> 48:19.250 I would not like to have a drink thrown in my face. 48:19.490 --> 48:23.812 That's one of those gestures that you see girls doing in films sometimes, like slapping is the other one. 48:23.972 --> 48:24.252 Yes. 48:24.412 --> 48:27.814 I've been slapped by a girl before, and I didn't even do anything that wrong. 48:28.074 --> 48:29.255 Hey, come on, this isn't about you. 48:29.715 --> 48:30.395 I didn't like it. 48:30.535 --> 48:32.436 Here's a text from Sophie in London. 48:32.556 --> 48:37.478 I once lost it when an old man reprimanded me for reaching past him for a lemon in a supermarket. 48:37.939 --> 48:40.480 I loudly pretended to put an evil spell on him. 48:41.501 --> 48:45.049 That's good, kind of drag me to hell style evil gypsy behaviour. 48:51.924 --> 48:52.485 That's scary. 48:52.505 --> 48:54.566 What did you say to me? 48:54.586 --> 48:57.227 That sounded more like a kind of a satanic incantation. 48:57.247 --> 48:58.508 That's what you're talking about though, isn't it? 48:59.008 --> 49:00.169 No, the language isn't right. 49:01.510 --> 49:03.771 The Woman in Drag Me to Hell does a brilliant one. 49:04.091 --> 49:05.152 Have you seen that movie yet? 49:05.172 --> 49:05.472 Not yet. 49:05.512 --> 49:06.052 No, I can't wait. 49:06.072 --> 49:06.532 Sam Raimi. 49:07.453 --> 49:08.994 She does a separate satanic language. 49:09.054 --> 49:13.676 It just sounds very witchy and it sounds like it means stuff and it sounds ancient and it's frightening. 49:13.797 --> 49:15.117 It'll give you the willies. 49:16.098 --> 49:17.379 Your pockets will be full of willies. 49:17.579 --> 49:19.620 Coldness visited unto your pebbles, there will be. 49:20.420 --> 49:21.101 That's scary. 49:21.121 --> 49:22.161 Visited onto your pebbles. 49:22.962 --> 49:24.783 Coldness visited onto your pebbles. 49:24.803 --> 49:25.424 No one wants that. 49:25.444 --> 49:26.384 That sounds refreshing. 49:26.784 --> 49:28.526 Sounds like something you'd pay for in a spa. 49:29.286 --> 49:30.567 Rest of the pebbles on your back. 49:30.907 --> 49:31.227 Mmm. 49:31.347 --> 49:31.768 Soothing. 49:32.408 --> 49:38.332 Dear Buckles and Dr. Sexy, Yesterday I experienced an outburst that is worthy of Adam's ticket fiasco. 49:38.352 --> 49:40.974 I was so ashamed I didn't tell my wife until text the nation was announced. 49:41.014 --> 49:42.775 I think she's having second thoughts about our marriage. 49:43.335 --> 49:50.840 Yesterday morning I sat on a crowded train a young man stood above me sniffing repeatedly distracting me from my free men's magazine. 49:51.600 --> 49:55.843 He then sat down on the seat next to me and continued sniffing and snorting. 49:56.143 --> 49:56.984 I lost it. 49:57.464 --> 50:01.707 I turned and I coughed straight in his face like an insane tramp. 50:02.367 --> 50:02.627 Wow. 50:03.307 --> 50:06.608 He looked a little taken aback, and then sniffed again. 50:06.949 --> 50:11.210 I coughed again, right in his face, and stared a crazy stare into his eyes. 50:12.010 --> 50:14.091 You just coughed in my face, he said. 50:14.771 --> 50:17.612 Well, you keep sniffing, I replied. 50:18.613 --> 50:20.353 I forgot my tissue, he told me. 50:20.593 --> 50:22.834 I don't care, it's disgusting, was my argument. 50:23.294 --> 50:24.554 He stopped sniffing and snuffling. 50:24.835 --> 50:28.076 Ha, that showed him, I thought to myself, whilst silently shaking. 50:29.437 --> 50:32.202 Deep down, though, I knew I had sacrificed my dignity. 50:32.503 --> 50:35.028 Can I take this apology to... What? 50:35.088 --> 50:36.551 Can I take this opportunity to apologize? 50:36.611 --> 50:37.753 Corin in Walthamstam. 50:37.793 --> 50:38.495 Good for you, Corin. 50:39.304 --> 50:45.465 coughing in someone's face, that's violating loads of unspoken laws, you know, just hygiene stuff with swine flu around. 50:45.485 --> 50:47.706 Have you not read your government-issued pamphlet? 50:47.806 --> 50:49.226 You've got to keep it locked down. 50:49.386 --> 50:50.026 One more, do you think? 50:50.066 --> 50:51.166 Maybe one more, okay. 50:52.167 --> 50:56.427 I shouted at a bus driver who refused to stop for someone who wanted the bus in Liverpool. 50:56.707 --> 50:57.768 Brackets I was on the bus. 50:58.208 --> 51:01.308 He took offence to this and refused to let me off the bus. 51:01.448 --> 51:02.529 Wow. 51:02.869 --> 51:04.029 I called him a kidnapper. 51:05.609 --> 51:11.293 This is escalating brilliantly and attempted to escape using the emergency exit while the bus was moving. 51:12.073 --> 51:15.796 Definitely not my final moment Dan from the Wirral. 51:16.016 --> 51:21.580 That escalates into a kind of speed-worthy action sequence from a simple altercation. 51:21.660 --> 51:22.020 Brilliant. 51:22.520 --> 51:23.701 Keep those coming in. 51:25.502 --> 51:53.543 like little little petty disputes that have got massively out of hand where you've been in the wrong the text number is 64046 yeah and you can email us if you're listening to this show on listen again or as part of the podcast of course you can keep your suggestions coming in and they might be included in retro textination on the following week's podcast adamandjo.6musicatbbc.co.uk is the email address if that's the case here's a bit of depeche mode this is peace 51:54.764 --> 51:57.025 Hmm, Depeche Mode there with Peace. 51:57.305 --> 51:59.146 Who's your favourite member of Depeche Mode, Joe? 51:59.806 --> 52:01.546 I would say it's Dave Gahan. 52:01.746 --> 52:02.387 The lead singer. 52:02.467 --> 52:02.807 Yeah. 52:03.007 --> 52:03.907 That's an obvious choice. 52:04.247 --> 52:05.588 Well, it's the only one I can think of. 52:05.628 --> 52:07.048 I don't know the other one's names. 52:07.748 --> 52:09.249 I don't really own any Depeche. 52:09.289 --> 52:09.789 Do you not? 52:09.809 --> 52:10.609 I like to say Depeche. 52:10.649 --> 52:15.251 I've got the 12 inch of... God's got a sixth sense of humour. 52:15.271 --> 52:15.991 Blasphemous rumour. 52:16.011 --> 52:16.891 Yeah, I've got the 12 of that, yeah. 52:18.892 --> 52:20.233 I still listen to New Life. 52:20.353 --> 52:21.574 I like Vince Clark era. 52:21.874 --> 52:23.916 Yes, that's probably their best era, isn't it? 52:23.996 --> 52:25.837 I bet that stuff sounds really good these days. 52:26.037 --> 52:26.718 Pictures of you. 52:26.738 --> 52:27.719 Is that what it's called? 52:28.359 --> 52:29.400 Well, don't get personal. 52:30.417 --> 52:33.238 Anyway, listeners, we like to make mistakes on this programme. 52:33.519 --> 52:36.281 You know, I say that we don't like to, but it happens, right? 52:36.641 --> 52:42.044 Because it's a freeform shambling show and stuff comes out of our mouths and often it's wrong. 52:42.885 --> 52:45.987 And we like to be corrected by our listeners and kept on our toes. 52:46.427 --> 52:50.250 So here's a few mistakes that we made on last week's show and in last week's podcast. 52:50.710 --> 52:55.654 We do a thing at the beginning of the podcasts where we say our names in the form of a song. 52:55.894 --> 52:57.035 And last week the song was 52:57.635 --> 53:01.618 Also Sprach Zarathustra, also known as the opening titles for 2001. 53:02.558 --> 53:06.181 I confidently said, yeah, that's also Sprach Zarathustra by Holst. 53:06.901 --> 53:10.204 And I was thinking that, you know, because Holst was famous for the Planet Suite, right? 53:10.704 --> 53:11.624 Mars bringer of war, et cetera. 53:11.644 --> 53:13.706 I thought he was responsible for all space-based music. 53:13.906 --> 53:15.067 Everything space-based. 53:15.107 --> 53:15.847 That'll be Holst. 53:16.208 --> 53:17.408 Yeah, it's got something to do with space. 53:17.468 --> 53:18.009 That's Holst. 53:18.289 --> 53:18.689 Strauss. 53:19.029 --> 53:19.430 Strauss. 53:19.470 --> 53:20.130 Richard Strauss. 53:20.210 --> 53:23.092 That was pointed out by Oliver Russell, amongst other people. 53:23.132 --> 53:23.693 Thanks, Oliver. 53:24.073 --> 53:26.434 Although I did realize as soon as I said Holst, really confident. 53:26.454 --> 53:26.935 Sure you did. 53:27.975 --> 53:29.176 I thought that's probably wrong, isn't it? 53:29.336 --> 53:29.896 Next mistake. 53:30.217 --> 53:30.837 Next mistake. 53:31.417 --> 53:31.777 Bowie. 53:32.278 --> 53:33.598 We were talking about Bowie last week. 53:33.758 --> 53:36.840 Fiona emailed us to say... Oh, this is the hoggle-cogle thing. 53:36.900 --> 53:37.100 Right. 53:37.140 --> 53:39.362 She said, Dear Adam and Jo, I love your show. 53:39.442 --> 53:40.442 Capital letters for love. 53:41.243 --> 53:43.564 And I listen to the podcast several times a week. 53:43.684 --> 53:45.025 I mean, she really likes this thing. 53:45.525 --> 53:46.766 I sing along to all the jingles. 53:46.866 --> 53:47.806 I laugh at all the jokes. 53:47.926 --> 53:48.987 I have a good time listening. 53:49.087 --> 53:49.867 She couldn't be happier. 53:50.067 --> 53:50.748 You would think. 53:51.860 --> 54:02.314 However, she says in capitals, last week a large portion of my enjoyment was removed when the pair of you... You see, now I thought this was on purpose. 54:03.075 --> 54:07.141 I thought you'd like invented a new type of variation of the name of Hoggle. 54:07.361 --> 54:09.863 I tried to remember because there's a joke in the movie Labyrinth. 54:09.883 --> 54:10.884 We were talking about Bowie, right? 54:10.904 --> 54:15.728 And we were referring to how we would ask him questions about Labyrinth if we ever got the chance to interview him. 54:15.748 --> 54:19.372 I was trying to remember the name of the little man with a big nose in Labyrinth. 54:19.772 --> 54:22.835 And there's a whole running joke about the fact that Bowie keeps getting his name wrong. 54:23.375 --> 54:25.177 And, uh, good excuse. 54:25.397 --> 54:27.699 And we, uh, we call him Coggl, right? 54:28.019 --> 54:29.140 Yeah, we were calling him Coggl. 54:29.801 --> 54:32.183 In fact, Bowie calls him Coggl in the film. 54:32.223 --> 54:33.304 And he goes, oh, it's Coggl. 54:33.384 --> 54:33.965 My name's Coggl. 54:34.545 --> 54:43.667 So she says, you call yourselves pretty high-level Bowie obsessives and then you proceed to make ridiculous mistakes that any true fan would know. 54:44.088 --> 54:47.308 Firstly, it's Hoggle in the brilliant film, Labyrinth. 54:47.708 --> 54:49.649 Not Kogel or whatever you made up. 54:50.129 --> 54:53.070 Secondly, who doesn't know Bowie lives in New York? 54:53.550 --> 54:56.934 I mean, I was talking about visiting Switzerland to try and track him down. 54:57.515 --> 55:00.739 To be fair, he's got homes all over the area, right? 55:01.420 --> 55:02.581 That was just one of his homes. 55:03.242 --> 55:05.244 I knew that Bowie lived in New York. 55:05.404 --> 55:07.167 You know, we could just ignore these mistakes. 55:07.207 --> 55:08.248 Just roll with the punches. 55:08.268 --> 55:09.029 Yeah, you reckon. 55:09.369 --> 55:10.850 We might just be encouraging people. 55:11.551 --> 55:12.851 I don't mind being corrected. 55:13.232 --> 55:20.677 She says, thirdly, the baby dancing song in Labyrinth, which I referred to as Dance Baby Dance, those are the lyrics though, is called Dance Magic. 55:21.017 --> 55:22.458 So get it together, boys! 55:22.698 --> 55:23.999 Anyway, she still loves the show. 55:24.359 --> 55:26.781 She even liked the Disgusting Habits segment, she says. 55:26.881 --> 55:28.062 Lots of love from Fiona. 55:28.382 --> 55:29.402 Thanks very much, Fiona. 55:30.143 --> 55:30.883 Appreciate that. 55:31.744 --> 55:36.027 So, you know, if we do make massive gaffes, then you can let us know. 55:36.047 --> 55:38.729 But don't be too pedantic, otherwise life just isn't worth living. 55:39.469 --> 55:48.017 You know, and I said earlier on that I was a bit worried I'd opened up a pedantry can of worms with the bad grammar in pop songs thing, right? 55:48.478 --> 55:51.941 Although here's one that did strike me as being quite accurate. 55:52.281 --> 55:57.886 Seanan Galway said, Hi, gentlemen, talking about infuriatingly bad pop grammar. 55:57.907 --> 56:01.270 Well, here's an infuriatingly unanswered question in a lyric. 56:01.710 --> 56:11.597 in Love Shack by the B-52s, which begins, if you see a faded sign by the side of the road that says 15 miles to the Love Shack! 56:11.877 --> 56:12.998 That's almost exactly how it goes. 56:13.518 --> 56:20.043 He then says, they go on at length to discuss the merits of the Love Shack, but never at any point do they answer the initial question. 56:20.443 --> 56:25.667 If you see the aforementioned faded sign at the side of the road that says 15 miles to the Love Shack, what?! ! 56:26.684 --> 56:28.826 They don't say, says Sean and Galway. 56:28.846 --> 56:29.907 I think that's a fair point. 56:30.948 --> 56:31.768 Are you worried by that? 56:31.989 --> 56:35.532 Well, I just think it's clear that the party, you know, we're there with a party. 56:35.592 --> 56:36.453 It's just a big party. 56:36.473 --> 56:37.573 The B-52s are there. 56:37.754 --> 56:41.557 Isn't the video even set in the love shack with all sorts of stuff happening in the shack? 56:42.057 --> 56:42.157 Yeah. 56:42.177 --> 56:43.258 So what's the answer to the question? 56:43.298 --> 56:46.101 I just think you're going down a never-ending road. 56:46.541 --> 56:46.822 Right. 56:46.862 --> 56:49.083 You know, lyrics are poetry. 56:49.103 --> 56:49.404 It's true. 56:49.424 --> 56:50.184 They're abstract. 56:50.965 --> 56:52.866 I mean, what are you going to do if you take everything literally? 56:52.886 --> 56:54.127 You're going to drive yourself insane. 56:54.147 --> 56:54.847 That's all true. 56:55.167 --> 56:55.587 And me. 56:56.008 --> 56:56.388 And you. 56:56.448 --> 56:57.808 And a portion of the listenership. 56:58.029 --> 56:59.569 Sorry, Sean and Galway. 56:59.870 --> 57:01.170 Um, some music. 57:01.190 --> 57:02.451 A little bit of music right now. 57:02.471 --> 57:06.033 This is my free play before you go and announce it all over the shop. 57:06.053 --> 57:06.693 Sorry, man. 57:06.733 --> 57:08.714 This is a Tribe Called Quest with Dabootie. 57:16.277 --> 57:17.919 That seems a bit extreme though, doesn't it? 57:17.959 --> 57:23.644 Just having dancing till you're actually dead and then you've had your head cut off by that time as well. 57:23.664 --> 57:24.885 I think it's euphemistic. 57:26.006 --> 57:27.227 You mean I'm taking it too literally? 57:27.247 --> 57:27.848 Yeah, yeah. 57:27.968 --> 57:29.169 Again, you're doing it again. 57:31.021 --> 57:34.743 That was Yeah Yeah Yeah's with Heads Will Roll to be released on June 29th. 57:35.503 --> 57:38.025 This is Adam and Jo on BBC Six Music. 57:38.045 --> 57:40.726 A couple of weeks ago, was it a couple of weeks ago? 57:40.786 --> 57:42.867 We did a little grunting masterclass. 57:43.147 --> 57:44.048 Yes, a couple of weeks, yeah. 57:44.168 --> 57:54.673 Yeah, I was harnessing Adam's skills as a screen actor to just take you listeners through some of the grunting skills that are required for performances in action films. 57:56.454 --> 57:56.914 That's good, man. 57:56.935 --> 57:57.295 What was that? 57:58.315 --> 58:02.739 That was lifting a manhole cover with a body lying across it. 58:02.899 --> 58:04.640 Yes, very good, very good. 58:04.680 --> 58:08.343 Important part of any actor's repertoire to be able to grunt for big screen movies. 58:09.024 --> 58:15.049 But I've always been fascinated by The Archers, the Radio 4 drama series. 58:15.129 --> 58:15.769 Are you a listener? 58:16.530 --> 58:17.551 I listen every now and then. 58:17.771 --> 58:20.773 I'm more often in a room when other people are listening. 58:21.394 --> 58:23.376 Or I catch the beginning and switch it off. 58:24.476 --> 58:34.282 But I do love the archers, and it's occurred to me that there's a special skill required for acting in the archers, similar to the skill of grunting for action films. 58:34.582 --> 58:39.886 In the archers it seems to me moaning and sighing is very important. 58:39.946 --> 58:40.506 That's good. 58:42.654 --> 58:57.644 It seems to me when I listen to the archers on Radio 4 that they're constantly coming into a Roman sighing, making tea, and then sighing again, and then that's the end of the scene. 58:57.784 --> 59:00.405 That's the default tone of the archers. 59:00.645 --> 59:01.246 I think so. 59:01.306 --> 59:02.186 It's sort of ennui. 59:02.527 --> 59:07.250 It's something that permeates Radio 4 drama as a whole, is sort of abject sighing. 59:08.210 --> 59:09.711 It's a good way of emoting on the radio. 59:09.731 --> 59:26.856 Yeah, well, it's important, you know, it's obviously you can't, there's no, nothing to look at, no face to express, so you've got to use the voice as a, I mean, you know this Adam already is an experienced actor, you've got to use the voice as a tool in radio very particularly, but I don't know, maybe sometimes it gets a little bit much on the archers. 59:27.376 --> 59:28.818 There's a little bit too much sighing. 59:28.838 --> 59:35.284 I wondered what would happen, for instance, if I took an episode of The Archers and removed everything but the sighing. 59:36.805 --> 59:38.167 I wondered what that would sound like. 59:38.227 --> 59:38.807 So I'd done it. 59:39.128 --> 59:39.588 You've done it. 59:39.628 --> 59:40.109 Let's have a listen. 59:40.129 --> 59:41.230 Yeah, this is what it sounds like. 59:48.169 --> 59:48.810 Thanks. 59:48.870 --> 59:49.290 Anyway. 59:49.310 --> 59:49.931 Tom? 59:50.691 --> 59:51.092 I'm dead. 59:51.332 --> 59:51.512 Alright. 01:00:13.626 --> 01:00:16.087 Now you see, it's not bad, is it? 01:00:16.407 --> 01:00:19.248 No, it sounds good, man, because you've got ups and downs, peaks and troughs in there. 01:00:19.268 --> 01:00:20.048 Yeah, yeah, yeah. 01:00:20.148 --> 01:00:22.149 I mean, it starts off quite fruity there. 01:00:22.409 --> 01:00:26.210 Well, it sounds like quite a dirty evening in Cambridge, doesn't it? 01:00:26.230 --> 01:00:27.110 Cambridge, what's it called? 01:00:27.130 --> 01:00:27.931 Cambridge, right? 01:00:28.571 --> 01:00:29.631 Yeah, Cambridge. 01:00:29.651 --> 01:00:30.331 It's like Cambridge. 01:00:30.371 --> 01:00:31.132 Yeah, Cambridge. 01:00:32.072 --> 01:00:33.112 Yeah, no, that was nice. 01:00:33.192 --> 01:00:37.794 It starts off very, very saucy and then gets a little bit tiring and then 01:00:38.416 --> 01:00:39.858 Yeah, and then, ah, Tom. 01:00:39.918 --> 01:00:40.458 Annoying. 01:00:41.860 --> 01:00:43.221 Yeah, and then it sort of kicks off again. 01:00:43.442 --> 01:00:43.802 Yeah. 01:00:44.883 --> 01:00:46.545 But are you good at sighing there? 01:00:46.585 --> 01:00:47.766 Could you do that sort of sighing? 01:00:49.448 --> 01:00:57.818 What if just come in the door and say, you've come home from a busy day's work and you're just calling into the house to see if anyone else is there? 01:00:58.118 --> 01:00:58.158 Go. 01:01:00.677 --> 01:01:01.057 Hello! 01:01:01.077 --> 01:01:02.958 That's good, you see. 01:01:03.338 --> 01:01:15.945 What about if the inspector has come to inspect the drainage systems on the farm and he's laid down a lot of new EU rules on how you're going to have to put the drainage down and you're telling your husband about all the new EU rules? 01:01:17.926 --> 01:01:20.688 Well, there's a lot of new EU rules about the drainage. 01:01:22.731 --> 01:01:23.832 That's good. 01:01:23.872 --> 01:01:25.232 You really, you really did that one. 01:01:25.492 --> 01:01:27.493 I mean, I exhaled as much as I could. 01:01:27.593 --> 01:01:36.176 What about just, you've had a hard day and you've just had a sip of tea and you've put the tea cup down and this is a side that just expresses all the ennui in your life, you know. 01:01:36.937 --> 01:01:37.017 Yeah. 01:01:37.037 --> 01:01:37.237 Okay. 01:01:37.757 --> 01:01:39.798 Putting that, I'm going to sip the tea first, right? 01:01:39.838 --> 01:01:41.299 Just to warn you, there'll be a sound effect for that. 01:01:50.890 --> 01:01:52.271 No, no, that was terrible. 01:01:52.291 --> 01:01:52.672 Too much. 01:01:52.772 --> 01:01:55.436 Yeah, that sounded like a horse doing a poo. 01:01:55.476 --> 01:01:57.859 You said everything, you said put everything in there. 01:01:57.999 --> 01:02:02.685 Yeah, but it came out as a incontinent foal, horse, stallion. 01:02:08.740 --> 01:02:12.184 I don't think anyone in Aimbridge would sip tea like that. 01:02:12.524 --> 01:02:13.425 Well, I'm doing it. 01:02:13.765 --> 01:02:14.907 I'm exaggerating. 01:02:15.487 --> 01:02:17.910 You're not a very good supportive director, I must say. 01:02:17.930 --> 01:02:22.575 Man, I can see you in one of the underworld films, yes, but not in The Archers. 01:02:22.995 --> 01:02:23.716 You're too big. 01:02:24.136 --> 01:02:24.817 Too big? 01:02:24.897 --> 01:02:28.961 I think we need an actor or an actress from The Archers to come and teach you about science. 01:02:34.724 --> 01:02:35.505 That's good, you see. 01:02:35.705 --> 01:02:36.386 That's better, isn't it? 01:02:36.406 --> 01:02:36.626 Wow. 01:02:36.926 --> 01:02:38.728 I mean, the drinking was still too much, but... Yeah. 01:02:39.749 --> 01:02:40.470 Anyway, there we go. 01:02:40.490 --> 01:02:44.554 That was a little glimpse into the secret world of The Archers for you listeners. 01:02:44.674 --> 01:02:45.234 Music time? 01:02:45.254 --> 01:02:46.475 What about some Joy Division? 01:02:46.936 --> 01:02:48.037 This is Love Will Tear Us Apart. 01:02:49.048 --> 01:02:51.089 Joy Division with Love Will Tear Us Apart. 01:02:51.109 --> 01:02:54.410 This is Adam and Jo on BBC6 Music on Saturday morning. 01:02:54.490 --> 01:02:55.671 Thanks for joining us listeners. 01:02:56.111 --> 01:03:03.674 Now we had a message earlier in the week from a chap who told us quite an entertaining story which I'd just like to share with you right now. 01:03:04.955 --> 01:03:07.156 This is from, where's his name? 01:03:07.656 --> 01:03:08.196 Geraint. 01:03:08.516 --> 01:03:09.537 Is that how you pronounce that name? 01:03:10.560 --> 01:03:13.042 Geraint, G-E-R-A-I-N-T. 01:03:14.043 --> 01:03:14.523 Geraint. 01:03:15.544 --> 01:03:21.009 Anyway, he says, Dear Adam and Joe, a few years ago, I was working on a film called Spy Game. 01:03:21.029 --> 01:03:22.190 You remember that film, right? 01:03:22.350 --> 01:03:24.392 Yeah, Robert Redford and Brad Pitts. 01:03:24.432 --> 01:03:26.174 Exactly, directed by Tony Scott. 01:03:26.694 --> 01:03:30.177 I was working closely there with a guy called Paul, and we came up with an idea. 01:03:30.537 --> 01:03:33.079 Let's ask famous people to take pictures of us. 01:03:33.720 --> 01:03:36.923 We might be able to start a gallery of pictures of us taken by celebs. 01:03:37.123 --> 01:03:38.885 It seemed like a good idea at the time. 01:03:39.485 --> 01:03:52.257 We were at the wrap party for Spy Game in a nightclub in a basement of a hotel in Casablanca in Morocco, where I thought this was the perfect opportunity to ask Brad Pitt to take a picture of me. 01:03:52.978 --> 01:03:57.402 He was sitting on a sofa surrounded by lots of people and a massive burly security guard. 01:03:57.882 --> 01:03:59.804 I approached with my camera in hand. 01:03:59.925 --> 01:04:05.551 The music was pumping and I couldn't really hear anything except for the blood and nerves pumping through my head. 01:04:06.132 --> 01:04:07.473 I shouted through the noise. 01:04:07.874 --> 01:04:09.576 Do you think you can take my picture? 01:04:09.936 --> 01:04:10.577 He shouted back. 01:04:10.757 --> 01:04:11.117 What? 01:04:11.658 --> 01:04:12.899 I shouted again and again. 01:04:12.919 --> 01:04:13.700 He said what? 01:04:14.421 --> 01:04:17.763 Everyone was staring at me, and I started to feel myself burning up. 01:04:18.083 --> 01:04:23.085 A security guard put his hand on my shoulder to push me away, and I felt that surely I had to give up. 01:04:23.345 --> 01:04:28.147 Suddenly, Brad Pitt stood up, took the guard's hand off my shoulder, and looked me square in the face. 01:04:28.407 --> 01:04:30.908 He smiled at me and asked, What do you want? 01:04:30.928 --> 01:04:32.309 That's how Brad Pitt speaks. 01:04:32.589 --> 01:04:33.109 Yes, it is. 01:04:52.734 --> 01:04:57.217 looked through the viewfinder, told me and Paul to go back a little, left a little, hold it, and click! 01:04:57.537 --> 01:05:04.842 We walked away happy that the ordeal was over, and we noticed the whole camera crew laughing and applauding our stupidity. 01:05:05.242 --> 01:05:11.006 Paul also later got Catherine McCormack to take a picture of him, but I'd completely lost my bottle by then. 01:05:11.326 --> 01:05:12.267 That's quite good though, isn't it? 01:05:12.287 --> 01:05:15.849 And he sent us a picture of... I've got the photo here up on my computer screen. 01:05:15.869 --> 01:05:17.671 It obviously doesn't include Brad Pitt. 01:05:17.691 --> 01:05:18.591 No, because he's taking it. 01:05:18.811 --> 01:05:22.554 But it's... Well, so he says... Come on, why would he make that whole thing up? 01:05:23.014 --> 01:05:26.396 Our listeners, some of them are mental. 01:05:26.557 --> 01:05:28.838 No, I'm sure that's taken by Brad Pitt. 01:05:29.078 --> 01:05:34.462 And, you know, in case there's any doubt, the photo file is titled, Brad Pitt took this! 01:05:34.942 --> 01:05:35.903 Exclamation mark. 01:05:35.943 --> 01:05:36.703 That proves it. 01:05:36.883 --> 01:05:43.208 But if we were running a magazine and say you thought this was a good idea for a strand in the letters page... No, it wouldn't be, would it? 01:05:43.248 --> 01:05:45.189 No, because how would you possibly prove it? 01:05:45.489 --> 01:05:46.270 That's true, isn't it? 01:05:47.010 --> 01:05:47.931 But it's a good story. 01:05:48.231 --> 01:05:49.572 It's a good story. 01:05:49.592 --> 01:05:51.613 I mean, it's a good story because I believe every word of it. 01:05:51.833 --> 01:05:53.334 Yes, you're a gullible chap. 01:05:53.734 --> 01:05:54.014 Come on. 01:05:54.034 --> 01:05:55.955 But no, I do believe it's taken by Brad Pitt. 01:05:56.036 --> 01:05:56.496 Do I? 01:05:56.836 --> 01:05:57.256 Yeah. 01:05:57.757 --> 01:06:05.221 Well, I tell you why, because the look on the chap's face on the right is the look of a man who is being looked at by Brad Pitt. 01:06:05.261 --> 01:06:05.421 Yeah. 01:06:07.421 --> 01:06:09.822 You know, I think I get on well with Brad Pitt. 01:06:10.303 --> 01:06:11.423 Joe Cornish. 01:06:11.523 --> 01:06:12.424 I think we get on well. 01:06:12.544 --> 01:06:16.827 I was watching the making of Benjamin Button on the Benjamin Button disc. 01:06:16.887 --> 01:06:19.008 It's got a very good making of... Probably the best bit in it. 01:06:19.408 --> 01:06:21.269 Yeah, it's a slightly pretentious film. 01:06:21.369 --> 01:06:22.690 Just put it mildly. 01:06:22.870 --> 01:06:27.591 But the making of is fascinating and yeah, Bret Pitt sounds very down-to-earth, very cynical. 01:06:28.331 --> 01:06:30.252 And I think I would just really hit it off with it. 01:06:30.272 --> 01:06:30.992 Cynical in what way? 01:06:31.312 --> 01:06:32.012 Just like me. 01:06:32.192 --> 01:06:34.172 Just, you know, just no pretensions. 01:06:34.812 --> 01:06:38.413 He doesn't think he's good looking, even though everyone else thinks he is good looking. 01:06:38.433 --> 01:06:39.013 Just like you. 01:06:39.233 --> 01:06:39.753 Like me. 01:06:40.194 --> 01:06:41.214 He's just very real. 01:06:41.274 --> 01:06:44.274 He wears similar heights. 01:06:44.474 --> 01:06:46.595 I just think we've got the same gritty outlook on life. 01:06:47.335 --> 01:06:47.635 True. 01:06:47.835 --> 01:06:55.158 And I think Brad and I, you know, I think Brad's missing a trick by not getting in touch with me and hanging out because I think things would improve for him. 01:06:55.518 --> 01:06:57.439 Does he have any Brit friends, Brad Pitt? 01:06:57.459 --> 01:06:57.839 Yeah, lots. 01:06:57.879 --> 01:07:00.260 He's got all the snatch lot. 01:07:00.840 --> 01:07:03.341 No, of course, Guy Ritchie and all that lot. 01:07:03.862 --> 01:07:04.742 He's got lots. 01:07:05.002 --> 01:07:06.223 He's an Anglophile. 01:07:06.263 --> 01:07:10.584 Well, he likes me because I'm particularly down to earth. 01:07:10.704 --> 01:07:14.426 No, he's not going to like you if he hangs out with Guy Ritchie. 01:07:15.421 --> 01:07:16.421 He won't be able to see you. 01:07:16.441 --> 01:07:18.242 He would like me because I've got a... He'll keep tripping over you. 01:07:18.442 --> 01:07:22.382 No, no, he would like me because I'm much more like the snatch guys than you are. 01:07:23.363 --> 01:07:24.443 I'm very... You think? 01:07:24.563 --> 01:07:25.203 Yeah, I'm frightening. 01:07:25.223 --> 01:07:26.323 You're a boring stent. 01:07:26.343 --> 01:07:27.163 I'm very hard. 01:07:27.544 --> 01:07:28.824 And you're a weed, though. 01:07:28.844 --> 01:07:30.264 What's he going to have in common with you? 01:07:30.324 --> 01:07:32.445 Well, he knows that I'm tough inside. 01:07:32.545 --> 01:07:32.885 No. 01:07:33.045 --> 01:07:37.126 That when you push me, I just snap and get... I go butt wild on your ass. 01:07:39.526 --> 01:08:01.834 Brad knows that so that's good news anyway um that I'm his favorite yeah thanks for the message though Geraint and the picture there that was yeah fantastic we're gonna put the picture on our blog okay and you can check it out don't forget we have a new blog and it's very exciting the address is bbc.co.uk forward slash blogs forward slash Adam and Joe there's loads of stuff on there so check 01:08:01.834 --> 01:08:02.914 Yeah, check that out and explore it. 01:08:02.934 --> 01:08:04.615 You can leave messages for us as well. 01:08:05.415 --> 01:08:06.456 The phone number's on the blog. 01:08:06.476 --> 01:08:08.916 There's a weird phone number for you to call and leave. 01:08:08.936 --> 01:08:10.197 We're anti-verbal messages. 01:08:10.297 --> 01:08:11.817 We might play some of those next week. 01:08:12.017 --> 01:08:12.658 We've been so busy. 01:08:12.698 --> 01:08:16.659 Everyone's gearing up for Glastonbury here at Six Music, so the pressure's on. 01:08:16.679 --> 01:08:19.480 But we might try and find some of those messages and play them next week. 01:08:19.540 --> 01:08:21.821 Here's Laura Veers right now with Salt Breakers. 01:08:21.841 --> 01:08:22.461 This is for Brad. 01:08:23.382 --> 01:08:24.643 That's Laura Veers. 01:08:25.404 --> 01:08:28.348 She hangs out with skiers with salt breakers. 01:08:28.588 --> 01:08:28.908 What? 01:08:28.928 --> 01:08:30.270 That's her little rhyme. 01:08:30.290 --> 01:08:30.951 Like skiers. 01:08:31.572 --> 01:08:31.972 Skiers. 01:08:32.253 --> 01:08:32.733 People who ski. 01:08:32.753 --> 01:08:33.534 Yeah, skiers. 01:08:34.035 --> 01:08:34.656 Skiers. 01:08:35.376 --> 01:08:40.563 This is Adam and Jo on BBC 6 Music on a Saturday morning in the last 42 minutes of our programme. 01:08:40.583 --> 01:08:41.264 Sun's coming out. 01:08:41.784 --> 01:08:49.577 I've just got a bit of advice for some people in the BBC, some of our fellow big British castle dwellers. 01:08:50.739 --> 01:08:53.323 It was the last episode of Points of View this week. 01:08:53.783 --> 01:08:54.084 Oh really? 01:08:54.104 --> 01:08:55.226 Do you ever watch Points of View? 01:08:55.366 --> 01:08:56.468 No, who's hosting it these days? 01:08:56.488 --> 01:08:57.169 Jeremy Vine. 01:08:57.429 --> 01:08:57.930 Vine. 01:08:58.070 --> 01:09:01.454 It used to be, I think I'm right in saying it's Vine, aren't I James? 01:09:01.594 --> 01:09:02.635 Used to be Ann Robinson. 01:09:03.116 --> 01:09:04.317 It was Wogan for a bit. 01:09:04.658 --> 01:09:06.400 Then it was one of the, was it Paul Heaney? 01:09:06.600 --> 01:09:13.488 Points of view that it's important for every television channel to have a show in which the listeners can get, you know, have their say. 01:09:13.568 --> 01:09:15.290 Barry Took was the king, wasn't he? 01:09:15.410 --> 01:09:15.731 Was he? 01:09:15.871 --> 01:09:16.492 Back in the day. 01:09:16.972 --> 01:09:23.361 But isn't it important for there to be a forum within a channel where viewers can have their say and get a sense of feedback? 01:09:23.401 --> 01:09:25.464 They've got to have their right to reply. 01:09:25.724 --> 01:09:27.126 Especially for the BBC. 01:09:27.266 --> 01:09:31.311 In this day and age there's been a lot of scrutiny of the BBC and its values and all that kind of business. 01:09:32.413 --> 01:09:43.208 So in a way, Points of View is a very important programme because it should seriously reflect that listener's points of view are being taken seriously. 01:09:44.229 --> 01:09:48.054 And you would have thought that would be reflected in the theme music. 01:09:49.055 --> 01:09:49.476 Wouldn't you? 01:09:49.616 --> 01:09:51.418 Yeah, I have no idea what the theme music is. 01:09:51.458 --> 01:09:59.325 Well, this is the theme music that the BBC have decided to use for points of view and they have kind of improved the rest of the show. 01:09:59.345 --> 01:10:04.571 In the old days, the host used, the letters used to be read out by sort of comedy voices, do you remember? 01:10:04.671 --> 01:10:04.891 Yeah. 01:10:05.151 --> 01:10:09.896 And it was just a tiny bit dismissive and making light of people's complaints. 01:10:10.376 --> 01:10:11.517 And I think they changed that. 01:10:11.597 --> 01:10:13.859 It's now presented by Jeremy Vine. 01:10:13.879 --> 01:10:18.123 And in the old days, it was in a sort of front room, a cozy sort of front room with some flowers. 01:10:18.183 --> 01:10:20.866 Now it's in a sort of, he's leaning on a control desk. 01:10:20.926 --> 01:10:26.991 It's as if it's more serious and like the news and as if your complaints are really getting to a place that matters. 01:10:27.492 --> 01:10:29.073 But they've made all those improvements. 01:10:29.093 --> 01:10:29.694 The control desk. 01:10:30.094 --> 01:10:36.719 but they're still using a theme tune that maybe doesn't reflect the necessary respect for their listeners. 01:10:36.739 --> 01:10:39.301 Because I would imagine it would be something like the news, you know? 01:10:39.481 --> 01:10:41.583 Yes, serious and important. 01:10:41.603 --> 01:10:42.604 Yeah, like a current affair. 01:10:42.644 --> 01:10:43.104 Yeah, yeah. 01:10:43.144 --> 01:10:44.685 Well, no, this is the theme tune they use. 01:10:56.496 --> 01:10:57.377 You made that up. 01:10:57.537 --> 01:10:58.899 No, that's the real theme music. 01:10:58.939 --> 01:11:02.344 I had to edit it a bit there because the iPlayer kept stalling. 01:11:02.764 --> 01:11:03.365 Ah, it does that. 01:11:04.246 --> 01:11:05.528 Is that really the theme music? 01:11:05.548 --> 01:11:06.549 That's the theme music. 01:11:06.690 --> 01:11:07.571 Let's have it again. 01:11:10.745 --> 01:11:18.654 The BBC has been in some quite serious trouble in the last year or so and that's just a tip to my colleagues in the castle. 01:11:19.034 --> 01:11:20.836 You might want to change that 01:11:34.190 --> 01:11:34.930 Who made that? 01:11:34.950 --> 01:11:37.512 I mean, whoever done that is a jingle genius for a star. 01:11:37.532 --> 01:11:39.773 Yeah, it's good music, but maybe on the wrong show. 01:11:39.833 --> 01:11:40.634 On the wrong show. 01:11:41.014 --> 01:11:42.755 See, that would be good theme music for our show. 01:11:43.496 --> 01:11:43.836 It would. 01:11:43.876 --> 01:11:46.978 Well, maybe we should sing over it or do an extended mix of it. 01:11:46.998 --> 01:11:50.140 We should do a jingle for... We should do a new piece of theme music for their show. 01:11:50.160 --> 01:11:52.522 We should sing them the Black Squadron music or something. 01:11:53.262 --> 01:11:55.924 I'll try and think of some new music for their show, right? 01:11:55.964 --> 01:11:59.126 They can have that, and we can use Blah Booby-Dee-Biley. 01:12:01.247 --> 01:12:03.068 We need to find out who composed that. 01:12:03.328 --> 01:12:05.108 Who composed Bla Boobity Blaya? 01:12:05.128 --> 01:12:08.630 I'd love to go to a live concert by then. 01:12:08.670 --> 01:12:11.311 I wonder what the album's like. 01:12:11.371 --> 01:12:13.952 For their encore they'd come out and they'd do that four more times. 01:12:14.112 --> 01:12:18.273 Anyway, message to Vine there and... Play Bla Boobity Blaya! 01:12:18.493 --> 01:12:22.975 Let's keep an eye on the next series of points of view and see whether they stick with that music. 01:12:24.676 --> 01:12:26.496 I'm sick of playing Blar Boobity Buyer. 01:12:26.676 --> 01:12:28.017 It's all anyone asks for. 01:12:28.797 --> 01:12:30.298 We're reforming the band. 01:12:30.938 --> 01:12:33.600 We're going to have to play Blar Boobity Buyer again. 01:12:33.880 --> 01:12:35.380 Here's a free play. 01:12:36.341 --> 01:12:44.685 Because I was feeling a little bit melancholy yesterday about acting like an idiot hole, I tried to pick some calming music to play today. 01:12:45.565 --> 01:12:51.648 And this is just one of the loveliest songs ever written, I think, by Van Morrison, and it's called Into the Mystic. 01:12:51.688 --> 01:12:53.329 Check out the bass in here as well. 01:12:53.469 --> 01:13:00.853 I mean, there's just a really, all the instrumentation here is so, like, everything does its job in such a succinct way. 01:13:00.893 --> 01:13:06.936 The horns, the bass, and Van Morrison's voice, of course, is so extraordinary and it's such a lovely tune. 01:13:06.996 --> 01:13:07.596 Hope you like it. 01:13:07.656 --> 01:13:08.537 This is Into the Mystic. 01:13:18.666 --> 01:13:20.567 That's from the album Moon Dance, of course. 01:13:20.828 --> 01:13:26.032 The first time I heard that song, I was uncomfortable with the line, I'm gonna rock your gypsy soul. 01:13:26.633 --> 01:13:32.378 The first time you heard that song was when I bought a cassette of it when we were interailing. 01:13:34.399 --> 01:13:36.301 What's the port that everyone... Patrasce. 01:13:36.401 --> 01:13:38.503 Patrasce, the port where you get the ferries from. 01:13:38.523 --> 01:13:40.844 I bought a little cassette of it in a shop in Patrasce. 01:13:40.924 --> 01:13:42.746 I had Astral Weeks and you had Moondons. 01:13:42.766 --> 01:13:47.830 Yeah, and there were no seats in the ferry, so we lay on the... Prow is that the front? 01:13:48.130 --> 01:13:48.530 Cuddled. 01:13:48.850 --> 01:13:49.531 And cuddled. 01:13:49.811 --> 01:13:52.553 I had Astral Weeks and you had Moondons. 01:13:54.455 --> 01:13:57.177 We were both freaks, playing with each other's pants. 01:13:57.897 --> 01:14:03.900 On the prow of the bow to Patras, patting my face and patting your ass. 01:14:04.340 --> 01:14:05.881 Is Pat based on anything that song? 01:14:06.121 --> 01:14:07.281 That's the song that we sang. 01:14:07.622 --> 01:14:07.922 Is it? 01:14:07.962 --> 01:14:08.742 Don't you remember? 01:14:09.763 --> 01:14:13.444 No, I've slept with so many men since, it's just a big hairy blur. 01:14:14.745 --> 01:14:16.025 The stinky hairy blur. 01:14:17.046 --> 01:14:18.647 That's what Graham Coxen calls himself. 01:14:19.427 --> 01:14:19.687 Yes. 01:14:19.747 --> 01:14:20.588 No, he's not. 01:14:20.908 --> 01:14:22.889 Listen, let's have some text the nations. 01:14:25.390 --> 01:14:30.334 That was the Geordie Texas Nation jingle created by Steve... Cody? 01:14:30.354 --> 01:14:31.795 Cody, those aren't Ds James. 01:14:31.875 --> 01:14:33.977 A D has a straight line, it's not just a circle. 01:14:51.850 --> 01:15:00.157 Okay, this week we're talking about altercations that have escalated out of control and left you feeling that you've gone too far. 01:15:00.457 --> 01:15:05.962 So you started out in the right perhaps, but you overreacted and ended up in the wrong. 01:15:06.622 --> 01:15:08.504 Mishandling. 01:15:08.884 --> 01:15:11.967 Here is one from an anonymous person. 01:15:12.708 --> 01:15:17.712 Ooh, I've just spotted it's got a rude word in it, but yet it's been ticked by our vetting society. 01:15:18.252 --> 01:15:18.653 Excellent. 01:15:19.333 --> 01:15:30.042 responsibility abdicated here we go James look that's too rude isn't it look which one what does it begin with 01:15:30.723 --> 01:15:33.004 Uh, a T and ends in the word storm. 01:15:35.385 --> 01:15:36.625 It's not, it's a sort of made up one. 01:15:36.665 --> 01:15:39.246 Anyway, oh yeah, I'm going to read it, but I'll avoid the bad word. 01:15:40.567 --> 01:15:42.187 Train ticket went out of zone. 01:15:42.888 --> 01:15:45.428 Okay, this is a kind of, who's approved this to be read? 01:15:45.448 --> 01:15:46.329 I'm going to skip past it. 01:15:46.369 --> 01:15:47.749 It's not even written in proper English. 01:15:48.149 --> 01:15:54.672 Train ticket went out of zone and didn't realise in rush hour and announced to the guard that... That's text speak though, isn't it? 01:15:54.732 --> 01:15:56.453 Someone's in trouble. 01:15:56.593 --> 01:15:57.413 Charlotte Guzzan. 01:15:58.632 --> 01:15:59.293 made no sense. 01:15:59.393 --> 01:16:00.054 Okay, here's a good one. 01:16:00.074 --> 01:16:00.975 This is from John in Hounslow. 01:16:16.832 --> 01:16:18.033 Yeah, did you listen to that one? 01:16:18.093 --> 01:16:18.453 No. 01:16:19.273 --> 01:16:26.476 Adam was just reading the other one with the rude word in it while I read that one and I knew when I finished there would be no response because he wasn't concentrating. 01:16:26.496 --> 01:16:29.357 There's so many schoolboy errors going on in this studio. 01:16:29.417 --> 01:16:31.398 I just went, oh dear. 01:16:31.458 --> 01:16:32.559 Oh dear. 01:16:32.639 --> 01:16:33.899 That was the right response though, wasn't it? 01:16:33.939 --> 01:16:35.060 Oh bad luck mister. 01:16:35.620 --> 01:16:36.761 Next please. 01:16:36.961 --> 01:16:37.361 Oh dear. 01:16:37.381 --> 01:16:38.221 Bad luck mister. 01:16:38.501 --> 01:16:40.002 Sorry mate, what was that? 01:16:40.342 --> 01:16:41.523 So here's another one from Chris. 01:16:41.983 --> 01:16:46.885 So just yesterday I confronted a student outside my local school who dropped a drinks can. 01:16:47.546 --> 01:16:48.626 Okay, we can identify with this. 01:16:48.946 --> 01:16:49.767 Casual littering. 01:16:50.167 --> 01:16:52.808 I asked him quite nicely to put it in the nearby bin. 01:16:53.149 --> 01:16:54.329 But he asked, why? 01:16:54.989 --> 01:16:55.350 Stumped. 01:16:55.770 --> 01:16:58.131 I said, because his mum didn't work there. 01:16:58.431 --> 01:17:01.933 Brackets in the street and wouldn't be along to clean up after him. 01:17:02.587 --> 01:17:04.730 Right, exposing him for being infantile. 01:17:05.892 --> 01:17:06.332 Tiny bup. 01:17:06.693 --> 01:17:10.137 Annoyingly he pointed out that she did however pay her taxes. 01:17:10.918 --> 01:17:16.705 Angry now, I picked up the can myself and said quite aggressively that everyone thinks he's useless. 01:17:18.055 --> 01:17:21.277 Not so bad, you might think, except that I am in fact a teacher at his school. 01:17:21.877 --> 01:17:24.419 I feel ashamed, Tar-Chris. 01:17:24.839 --> 01:17:27.660 Everyone thinks you're useless, but sir. 01:17:28.721 --> 01:17:30.382 That's not what you want from your teacher, isn't it? 01:17:30.402 --> 01:17:35.665 Listen, I'm going to propose we curtail this Texanation, and I'm going to vet them properly, and we're going to do another lot before noon. 01:17:35.685 --> 01:17:39.607 We'll wrap it up in the next half hour, but now it's gone 11.30 and it's time for the news. 01:17:45.171 --> 01:17:45.571 Do you know what? 01:17:45.651 --> 01:17:50.216 I think we could play nothing but 80's synth records for the whole show. 01:17:51.217 --> 01:17:53.920 And lots of younger people probably wouldn't know the difference. 01:17:54.280 --> 01:17:55.121 They probably like it. 01:17:55.261 --> 01:17:56.462 They probably like it a lot. 01:17:56.602 --> 01:17:58.544 We could make it a specialised music show. 01:17:58.785 --> 01:17:59.045 Yes. 01:17:59.265 --> 01:18:01.748 But then what about the people that don't like that kind of music? 01:18:02.108 --> 01:18:03.969 Well, they're not really au courant. 01:18:04.309 --> 01:18:05.270 So they should be punished. 01:18:05.570 --> 01:18:05.810 Les. 01:18:06.470 --> 01:18:07.171 Ostracized. 01:18:07.591 --> 01:18:09.012 We should punish them. 01:18:09.072 --> 01:18:09.672 Punish them. 01:18:09.732 --> 01:18:12.393 If they're not with it, they will be without it. 01:18:12.853 --> 01:18:13.094 Yes. 01:18:14.354 --> 01:18:15.015 That's a good idea. 01:18:15.035 --> 01:18:16.195 Can we do that, James? 01:18:16.735 --> 01:18:18.516 We played just 80 synth music. 01:18:18.556 --> 01:18:20.757 Well, all our free plays could be 80 synth music. 01:18:20.777 --> 01:18:21.518 Should we do that next week? 01:18:21.578 --> 01:18:21.778 Yeah. 01:18:21.858 --> 01:18:27.281 I'm convinced that Yazoo were the kind of year zero that all these bands are trying to copy. 01:18:27.321 --> 01:18:29.362 Well, their name sounds very similar to year zero. 01:18:30.082 --> 01:18:30.382 Yes. 01:18:30.983 --> 01:18:31.603 Yazoo. 01:18:31.983 --> 01:18:33.184 You know, I think that's the key record. 01:18:33.204 --> 01:18:34.886 I think Don't Go is the key record. 01:18:34.906 --> 01:18:40.972 I think if someone were to write that now and release it, it would just be so super hot. 01:18:41.333 --> 01:18:42.634 That's very good, isn't it? 01:18:42.674 --> 01:18:44.596 No one's dead to cover it because it's too good. 01:18:44.836 --> 01:18:46.738 Well, they re-release it every now and then, don't they? 01:18:46.758 --> 01:18:49.421 They mess around with the beat, but the original beat... It's a great record. 01:18:52.344 --> 01:18:53.144 That's in that one, isn't it? 01:18:53.304 --> 01:18:54.185 Yeah. 01:18:54.225 --> 01:18:55.925 He's a genius, Vince Clark. 01:18:56.305 --> 01:18:58.866 We haven't had any pop-propriation for a couple of weeks. 01:18:59.366 --> 01:19:07.329 Pop-propriation is what we call it when people send in their songs that they customize to fit in with it. 01:19:07.389 --> 01:19:08.950 Well, we've got a jingle that explains it. 01:19:08.990 --> 01:19:09.290 Here it is. 01:19:10.715 --> 01:19:36.809 I like to change the lyrics of songs from time to time To make them refer to things I do I call it population and as far as I'm aware it isn't a crime I wonder if it's something you do too 01:19:42.796 --> 01:19:48.480 Listen, you know what I was just saying about Yazoo being the year zero synth pop record? 01:19:48.680 --> 01:19:49.240 Scrap it. 01:19:49.501 --> 01:19:50.761 Because that's it right there. 01:19:51.002 --> 01:19:52.102 Flip the script. 01:19:53.763 --> 01:19:55.685 That's the year zero record. 01:19:55.785 --> 01:19:57.266 The pop procreation jingle. 01:19:57.306 --> 01:19:58.266 By Vince Buxton. 01:20:02.622 --> 01:20:04.643 Here's a message from Graham McCary. 01:20:05.203 --> 01:20:06.504 He says... Hey, hang on a second. 01:20:06.524 --> 01:20:07.905 We've got a music bed going on here. 01:20:07.925 --> 01:20:08.985 This is disconcerting. 01:20:09.145 --> 01:20:10.226 I know, it's professional, isn't it? 01:20:10.406 --> 01:20:11.206 It's faded out now anyway. 01:20:11.226 --> 01:20:11.767 Thank God for that. 01:20:12.547 --> 01:20:20.611 He says... When standing listlessly at the printer, my eye is often drawn to the screen that shows the status of the toner cartridges. 01:20:21.192 --> 01:20:23.093 They are labelled CMYK. 01:20:24.073 --> 01:20:25.474 Do you know what that stands for? 01:20:25.494 --> 01:20:25.914 Do you know what? 01:20:25.934 --> 01:20:26.635 I wasn't listening. 01:20:27.355 --> 01:20:29.476 Oh, you're getting me back from that for that last textination. 01:20:29.496 --> 01:20:31.417 It was a coincidence. 01:20:31.497 --> 01:20:33.499 CMYK on a printer. 01:20:34.659 --> 01:20:35.159 No, I don't. 01:20:35.179 --> 01:20:39.382 Cyan, magenta, yellow, cork and 01:20:39.922 --> 01:20:40.623 What is K? 01:20:40.703 --> 01:20:42.203 Oh, Black is for K, right? 01:20:42.263 --> 01:20:44.545 But I don't know why K is... anyway. 01:20:45.345 --> 01:20:49.227 He says, this invariably makes me sing to the tune of YMCA by the village people. 01:20:49.467 --> 01:20:54.250 C-M-Y-K, you fill your printer with C-M-Y-K. 01:20:54.430 --> 01:20:55.911 Thank you and goodbye, Graham McCarry. 01:20:56.471 --> 01:20:58.212 Thank you and goodbye. 01:20:58.693 --> 01:21:00.394 Goodbye, thank you, bye. 01:21:00.414 --> 01:21:02.675 V3PO, exactly. 01:21:02.856 --> 01:21:04.437 This is a nice one from Paul. 01:21:04.857 --> 01:21:10.401 He says, hey Adam and Jo, just a quick note with a particularly romantic piece of propropriation. 01:21:10.441 --> 01:21:12.142 I can't even say the name of our feature. 01:21:12.842 --> 01:21:14.604 My new, you came up with that name, didn't you? 01:21:14.644 --> 01:21:15.164 Nah, listener. 01:21:15.224 --> 01:21:15.785 Is that a listener? 01:21:16.585 --> 01:21:26.497 My new wife and I had fun singing this on our wedding a couple of weeks ago, after our wedding a couple of weeks ago, all the way up on the M6, on the way to our honeymoon haven in Keswick. 01:21:27.138 --> 01:21:30.081 We sang to the tune of kids TV classic Button Moon. 01:21:30.442 --> 01:21:36.108 We're off on honeymoon, we're Mr. and Mrs. Broom, Mr. Broom. 01:21:37.049 --> 01:21:38.410 Mrs Broom. 01:21:38.871 --> 01:21:41.573 Is there a better way to start a happy marriage together, he says? 01:21:41.753 --> 01:21:43.815 I think probably not, smiley emoticon. 01:21:44.115 --> 01:21:46.657 We're like the new Peter Davidson and Sandra Dickinson. 01:21:47.198 --> 01:21:49.299 Only hopefully without the eventual divorce. 01:21:49.519 --> 01:21:50.941 Love the show, take care Paul. 01:21:51.681 --> 01:21:52.802 That's nice, don't you think? 01:21:53.002 --> 01:21:53.783 That's very nice. 01:21:58.109 --> 01:21:58.769 Yeah, it's nice. 01:21:58.929 --> 01:22:00.210 And maybe a bit too nice. 01:22:00.410 --> 01:22:00.750 Is it? 01:22:01.030 --> 01:22:02.531 There's something sinister about it. 01:22:02.771 --> 01:22:03.952 Do you think their marriage is going to last? 01:22:03.972 --> 01:22:05.312 I think there's a carcass in the boot. 01:22:05.872 --> 01:22:06.373 You reckon? 01:22:06.533 --> 01:22:06.853 Yeah. 01:22:07.773 --> 01:22:09.114 And some tools for killing. 01:22:09.354 --> 01:22:11.615 I didn't like that show though, Button Moon was not one of my things. 01:22:11.635 --> 01:22:12.755 What's wrong with Button Moon? 01:22:12.815 --> 01:22:13.416 I didn't like it. 01:22:13.896 --> 01:22:14.296 Why not? 01:22:14.316 --> 01:22:17.157 You don't like anthropomorphised wooden spoons? 01:22:17.817 --> 01:22:20.379 I was excited by the fact that it was space, right? 01:22:20.419 --> 01:22:22.239 Yes, well it is space and they get in a rocket. 01:22:22.399 --> 01:22:23.460 Yeah, but it's like... 01:22:23.920 --> 01:22:27.722 It's made with a dishwasher fluid bottle. 01:22:27.862 --> 01:22:28.223 No, it is. 01:22:28.243 --> 01:22:31.805 Little Tommy had to wait ages for Mum to use all that stuff. 01:22:32.005 --> 01:22:36.628 It's undeniably a charming show for toddlers, but maybe I was the wrong age. 01:22:36.688 --> 01:22:38.669 It just made me... How old were you? 01:22:39.189 --> 01:22:39.889 In your 20s. 01:22:39.949 --> 01:22:42.131 I was in my 20s and I wanted some lasers. 01:22:43.712 --> 01:22:51.558 Killing and you know, mr. Well, I'm sure they'll remake it Michael Bay still gonna do the button moon movie do a really violent one Yeah, it's gonna be great. 01:22:51.778 --> 01:22:53.399 It's gonna be awful really horrible. 01:22:53.519 --> 01:22:54.680 Really really disgusting. 01:22:54.720 --> 01:22:55.661 It's actually gasper. 01:22:55.721 --> 01:23:02.486 No, he's doing it Is it is Takashi Mika doing he's teaming up with Ruhei Kitamura 01:23:03.686 --> 01:23:05.507 Minnie Jones is going to be Mr. Spoon. 01:23:05.667 --> 01:23:05.947 Yeah. 01:23:06.527 --> 01:23:07.947 Here's another one from Craig Allen. 01:23:08.247 --> 01:23:09.208 Again, printer-based. 01:23:09.508 --> 01:23:10.528 Or, no, computer-based. 01:23:10.828 --> 01:23:14.389 Here's some appropriation for graphic designers and photoshoppers. 01:23:14.709 --> 01:23:18.871 As a designer myself, I occasionally need to tone down the colours in an image. 01:23:19.231 --> 01:23:22.352 For this, I use a function called Hue Saturation. 01:23:22.572 --> 01:23:29.334 Hue forward slash saturation, which I can't open without singing to the tune of the Sade classic, Hue Saturation. 01:23:30.834 --> 01:23:31.815 Pure saturation. 01:23:31.835 --> 01:23:33.336 That's good because it's unexpected. 01:23:33.476 --> 01:23:33.696 Right. 01:23:34.097 --> 01:23:34.657 That's good. 01:23:34.697 --> 01:23:36.379 Smooth operator, of course that was. 01:23:36.439 --> 01:23:37.460 Cheers Craig Allen. 01:23:37.700 --> 01:23:38.220 Thanks Craig. 01:23:38.260 --> 01:23:40.942 And here's one final one for pop appropriation this week. 01:23:41.483 --> 01:23:43.364 This is from Aaron Glass or Glass. 01:23:43.885 --> 01:23:51.151 Hi chaps, I'm about three weeks behind on my podcasts but I just thought that I'd write to you regarding singing songs to illustrate everyday things. 01:23:51.411 --> 01:23:53.713 I'm a vegan and don't drink moo milk 01:23:54.053 --> 01:23:58.935 But there are various alternatives, all of which are a bit odd, usually made from soya, rice or oats. 01:23:59.195 --> 01:24:04.958 One brand of rice milk, which I have tried and there are many other brands, a few times is called Rice Dream. 01:24:05.238 --> 01:24:06.538 I have this myself, incidentally. 01:24:06.578 --> 01:24:10.780 It's very tasty, although, of course, there are other milk alternatives. 01:24:11.240 --> 01:24:12.621 Whenever I, are you having fun? 01:24:12.961 --> 01:24:19.524 Whenever I fetch it from my fridge, I can't help singing Rice Dream, Rice Dream. 01:24:19.984 --> 01:24:22.006 to the tune of the Radiohead song Nice Dream. 01:24:22.366 --> 01:24:23.907 Okay, that's just two notes. 01:24:23.927 --> 01:24:28.451 Yeah, but it's like... Doesn't sound like a very good song, is it? 01:24:28.831 --> 01:24:29.972 It's a brilliant song! 01:24:30.273 --> 01:24:31.434 Doing my best impression on yours. 01:24:31.454 --> 01:24:32.475 The melody's not that unique. 01:24:32.555 --> 01:24:33.675 Beautiful tortured draw. 01:24:34.196 --> 01:24:35.997 I'm sorry I read that last one out. 01:24:36.017 --> 01:24:38.239 I mean, you gave me a hard time right the way through. 01:24:38.259 --> 01:24:39.460 It's good, I'm just dissing Radiohead. 01:24:39.500 --> 01:24:40.501 It's fresh, no one does it. 01:24:40.641 --> 01:24:41.562 It's fresh and interesting. 01:24:41.582 --> 01:24:44.585 It's true, it's a fresh angle on the whole thing, isn't it? 01:24:45.225 --> 01:24:47.047 We found a weak chink in Radiohead's armour. 01:24:47.407 --> 01:24:50.129 A melody that goes... That's a brilliant song! 01:24:50.830 --> 01:24:51.691 I'm not doing it justice. 01:24:51.731 --> 01:24:53.152 Obviously, obviously, obviously, obviously. 01:24:53.412 --> 01:24:54.573 But it's just fresh and exciting. 01:24:54.834 --> 01:24:55.154 Yeah. 01:24:55.554 --> 01:24:57.256 This little electric crackle. 01:24:57.676 --> 01:24:58.817 They're dissing Radiohead. 01:24:59.298 --> 01:25:01.059 No one disses Radiohead. 01:25:01.119 --> 01:25:01.840 It's good for Radiohead. 01:25:01.860 --> 01:25:04.823 They're going, oh, oh, I haven't felt that sensation for years. 01:25:04.863 --> 01:25:05.964 We should pull our socks up. 01:25:06.004 --> 01:25:08.206 Yeah. 01:25:08.246 --> 01:25:09.387 Here's the clash. 01:25:10.287 --> 01:25:11.227 Very good, well done. 01:25:11.247 --> 01:25:13.789 That was The Clash with White Man and Hammersmith Pallet. 01:25:13.909 --> 01:25:16.530 It's time to wrap up Text-o-Nation right now, and here's the jingle! 01:25:18.751 --> 01:25:19.591 Text-o-Nation! 01:25:19.631 --> 01:25:19.911 Text! 01:25:19.991 --> 01:25:20.272 Text! 01:25:20.332 --> 01:25:20.672 Text! 01:25:20.792 --> 01:25:21.552 Text-o-Nation! 01:25:21.632 --> 01:25:22.553 What if I don't want to? 01:25:22.813 --> 01:25:23.493 Text-o-Nation! 01:25:23.513 --> 01:25:24.033 It doesn't matter! 01:25:24.093 --> 01:25:24.313 Text! 01:25:27.077 --> 01:25:40.365 A lady called Karen has been persistently texting us saying that she popropriates the text the nation jingle and changes the theme to the subject of loving with her husband. 01:25:41.066 --> 01:25:42.146 But what if I don't want to? 01:25:42.486 --> 01:25:43.187 It doesn't matter. 01:25:43.907 --> 01:25:44.488 Anyway, you get the idea. 01:25:45.248 --> 01:25:47.490 I just thought I'd say it because every week she texts it in. 01:25:48.111 --> 01:25:48.972 It makes us chuckle. 01:25:49.032 --> 01:25:49.752 It's impressive. 01:25:50.073 --> 01:25:50.553 We like it. 01:25:51.014 --> 01:26:02.024 Anyway, Text the Nation this week is all about confrontations you've had with people and you've been in the right, but you've overreacted to such an extent that you've ended up feeling in the wrong. 01:26:02.945 --> 01:26:03.185 Yeah? 01:26:03.386 --> 01:26:04.306 Yeah, that's exactly right. 01:26:04.326 --> 01:26:10.031 Basically, we sculpt the description of it over three hours and only at the end of the show. 01:26:10.291 --> 01:26:10.692 Do we get it right? 01:26:10.712 --> 01:26:12.693 Yeah, but there's retro textination in the podcast. 01:26:12.774 --> 01:26:13.334 Oh, that's right. 01:26:13.354 --> 01:26:15.636 Free them for further smoothing and sculpting. 01:26:15.736 --> 01:26:17.237 Okay, here's one from Phil in Leeds. 01:26:17.638 --> 01:26:21.141 I've been having problems with teenage youths kicking a ball against my fence. 01:26:21.401 --> 01:26:25.424 They're not even playing football, they're just using it as a place to gather and probably drink. 01:26:26.445 --> 01:26:34.369 I've asked a number of times for them to stop and I've just received abuse such as, you bleeping old man, which really depresses me as I'm only 36. 01:26:36.130 --> 01:26:47.396 So when I saw a ball come over the fence last week I ran out and stuck a screwdriver through the ball and threw it back over the fence only to hear a very small child crying. 01:26:47.716 --> 01:26:53.059 When I looked over said fence there was a group of four six to seven year olds looking shell shocked. 01:26:53.559 --> 01:26:56.440 and my neighbour's boy holding a flat ball and in tears. 01:26:59.020 --> 01:27:03.662 The screwdriver, I mean, that's a very aggressive sort of tool. 01:27:04.222 --> 01:27:05.902 It's just a nasty image, isn't it? 01:27:05.942 --> 01:27:06.542 The shank. 01:27:06.842 --> 01:27:09.383 It's like he's gone out there and he's stabbing it repeatedly. 01:27:13.766 --> 01:27:18.749 You've got to be careful with even holding something like that in a situation like this. 01:27:18.769 --> 01:27:20.530 He's run from Ross in Paris. 01:27:21.510 --> 01:27:27.093 Ross Perkin, he says, when cycling in Italy, I got very angry with a bus driver that nearly smashed me off the road. 01:27:27.533 --> 01:27:31.215 Later, I saw the bus at the lights and decided to give that driver a piece of my mind. 01:27:31.855 --> 01:27:38.419 After some swear miming and serious head shaking, I mistakenly used the, I'm going to slit your throat gesture. 01:27:39.642 --> 01:27:42.343 Meaning it as you could have killed me. 01:27:44.264 --> 01:27:45.644 The driver got very irate. 01:27:46.025 --> 01:27:50.066 He rolled up his sleeves, left his tourist-filled bus to chase me down the road. 01:27:50.526 --> 01:27:52.947 Luckily I managed to pedal off hastily enough to safety. 01:27:53.287 --> 01:27:54.288 He was massive. 01:27:55.854 --> 01:27:56.735 Oh no. 01:27:57.275 --> 01:27:59.197 Accidental I'm gonna kill you gesture. 01:27:59.217 --> 01:27:59.917 That's not what you want. 01:27:59.937 --> 01:28:00.598 That's not what you want. 01:28:20.213 --> 01:28:21.354 That's really overreacting to it. 01:28:21.374 --> 01:28:24.535 No one likes being hit by pizza though, especially if it's not cooked. 01:28:24.815 --> 01:28:25.495 Yes. 01:28:25.836 --> 01:28:26.996 Okay, one more Justin. 01:28:27.016 --> 01:28:28.517 I pulled into a busy petrol station. 01:28:28.557 --> 01:28:35.479 I pulled into a position where I was sort of waiting in one line, but was covering my options to move into the next lane if the car there went off quicker. 01:28:35.780 --> 01:28:39.521 However, someone in a big black Mercedes pulled into this other lane in front of me. 01:28:39.841 --> 01:28:43.063 I went ballistic, beeping and doing the fist up and down sign. 01:28:43.423 --> 01:28:44.523 What, the classic Beno? 01:28:44.543 --> 01:28:45.504 Yeah, yeah. 01:28:45.804 --> 01:28:46.484 I'll get you! 01:28:46.524 --> 01:28:47.604 The Paddington Bear, Mr Curry. 01:28:47.624 --> 01:28:48.225 That's right, yeah. 01:28:48.325 --> 01:28:48.545 Yeah. 01:28:49.626 --> 01:28:56.013 He got out of his car, I got out of mine, thinking this was about to turn into a full petrol station forecourt rage incident. 01:28:56.433 --> 01:28:59.697 Just then he said, oh sorry, I didn't realise you were waiting for this lane. 01:28:59.717 --> 01:29:00.858 Do you want me to move? 01:29:03.110 --> 01:29:04.010 No, sorry, that's all right. 01:29:04.050 --> 01:29:04.951 I'll just wait for this one. 01:29:04.991 --> 01:29:05.451 Sorry about that. 01:29:05.471 --> 01:29:06.132 I've had a bad day. 01:29:06.712 --> 01:29:07.733 Replied Justin. 01:29:08.713 --> 01:29:09.634 That's a happy ending. 01:29:09.974 --> 01:29:10.994 That's probably enough, isn't it? 01:29:11.074 --> 01:29:11.335 Yeah. 01:29:11.355 --> 01:29:12.015 Thank you so much. 01:29:12.035 --> 01:29:16.578 We'll read more out, as we said, in next week's podcast for Retro Text the Nation. 01:29:16.658 --> 01:29:16.878 Yeah. 01:29:16.998 --> 01:29:20.760 Don't forget you can download our podcast on a Monday evening, usually. 01:29:21.260 --> 01:29:21.781 It's free. 01:29:21.841 --> 01:29:25.123 You can get it off iTunes and from the BBC's own website. 01:29:26.363 --> 01:29:29.985 This is from Prince's album Purple Rain. 01:29:30.025 --> 01:29:31.305 Have you ever heard of that album Adam? 01:29:31.325 --> 01:29:33.186 It's a good film that goes with it. 01:29:34.567 --> 01:29:35.307 No. 01:29:35.447 --> 01:29:37.408 Well, get a listen to this. 01:29:37.448 --> 01:29:38.368 This is Take Me With You. 01:29:38.648 --> 01:29:39.529 Get a listen to this. 01:29:41.235 --> 01:29:55.565 We're having to fade out of this a bit early because we're reaching the edge of our allotment where we grow our little veggies and this Kershaw is taking over in approximately four minutes but thank you very much to everybody for listening and everyone who's emailed and texted. 01:29:56.226 --> 01:30:05.532 You can listen again to this show if you want to via the BBC's iPlayer or you can download the highlights in podcast form on about Monday at five. 01:30:05.632 --> 01:30:08.654 Don't forget to check out our blog on the Six Music website. 01:30:08.995 --> 01:30:10.656 Leave a stupid message on our phone line 01:30:11.256 --> 01:30:13.838 or, you know, I don't know, interact with us in some way. 01:30:13.958 --> 01:30:19.501 And don't forget, try and, you know, go to the website for more details about being our guest at this year's Glastonbury. 01:30:19.521 --> 01:30:23.204 You can win those tickets by answering some very simple questions. 01:30:23.544 --> 01:30:24.304 But that's it for us. 01:30:24.545 --> 01:30:25.405 Have a very good week. 01:30:25.665 --> 01:30:29.167 Yeah, we'll be back at the same time next Saturday 9 till noon on 6 Music. 01:30:29.227 --> 01:30:29.968 Take care, love you, bye!