WEBVTT 00:00.777 --> 00:03.754 Hello and welcome to the big British castle. 00:03.935 --> 00:04.579 It's time for... 00:15.546 --> 00:18.068 How was my granddad, Uncle Raymond? 00:19.008 --> 00:21.090 Even though he's my granddad, we call him Uncle Raymond. 00:21.830 --> 00:23.891 And that was some of his friends as well. 00:23.951 --> 00:27.894 Uncle Raymond's friends, Barry... He's not planning to release that, is he, Uncle Raymond? 00:27.954 --> 00:28.995 No, no, it's just a lark about. 00:29.015 --> 00:31.876 No, it's just for fun, because it's very dated sounding. 00:31.936 --> 00:34.538 It sounds like it's from the olden dates. 00:34.978 --> 00:36.179 Yeah, it's from the olden dates. 00:36.239 --> 00:37.760 They get together in the shed. 00:38.281 --> 00:39.341 How old is he, your granddad? 00:39.361 --> 00:40.482 He's over 78. 00:40.662 --> 00:41.643 Oh, that's nice, isn't it? 00:41.743 --> 00:42.783 Yeah, they're all 78s. 00:42.924 --> 00:44.364 How nice of you to play it on the air. 00:44.424 --> 00:44.925 And they hang together. 00:45.325 --> 00:46.946 I told him I would because he loves the show. 00:46.966 --> 00:47.567 Yeah, yeah. 00:47.607 --> 00:54.492 He listens to the show and he thinks it's a lot of fun and he said, you know, me and some of the chaps have done a new song. 00:55.033 --> 00:56.814 Maybe you could play that on your programme. 00:56.914 --> 00:58.876 He sounds more like the Icelandic goblin. 00:59.376 --> 01:01.358 Yes, he's from the other week. 01:01.618 --> 01:04.198 He has come from Iceland sometimes, he goes to Iceland sometimes. 01:04.839 --> 01:05.179 Really? 01:05.219 --> 01:05.959 Along with Mum, yes. 01:06.319 --> 01:06.999 And he's back. 01:07.019 --> 01:08.999 You're lying that this whole thing's a lie. 01:09.019 --> 01:09.919 That was Bono. 01:10.280 --> 01:12.060 And U2 would get your boots on. 01:12.080 --> 01:15.680 The first single from U2's new album, No Line on the Horizon. 01:15.700 --> 01:16.921 Oh my goodness, you're right. 01:17.181 --> 01:21.221 It does sound exactly like my Uncle Raymond's stuff though, which is very good. 01:21.241 --> 01:22.982 I don't know who should be more ashamed. 01:23.562 --> 01:24.502 Hey, good morning listeners. 01:24.582 --> 01:29.023 This is Adam and Jo on BBC Six Music, back after... How long have we been away for? 01:29.103 --> 01:29.563 Two weeks? 01:30.043 --> 01:30.603 Two weeks. 01:30.703 --> 01:31.304 Yeah, two weeks. 01:31.444 --> 01:32.444 Very happy to be back. 01:32.805 --> 01:40.629 Thank you very much for listening, especially if you're listening live to this very early part of the show, which is, I always feel a very special little nook. 01:40.729 --> 01:41.829 It's the VIP zone. 01:41.909 --> 01:42.430 Exactly. 01:43.010 --> 01:43.950 For early adopters. 01:44.391 --> 01:44.751 Right. 01:44.831 --> 01:46.432 You know, people who are still half asleep? 01:46.552 --> 01:46.792 Yeah. 01:47.292 --> 01:48.093 Radio mavens. 01:48.153 --> 01:48.573 Exactly. 01:48.633 --> 01:50.994 It's kind of a surreal flange of an area. 01:51.094 --> 01:52.135 And what a lot has happened. 01:52.495 --> 01:53.555 just as soon as we went away. 01:53.575 --> 01:58.457 I mean we were talking about this in the pre-record that we did that was broadcast not last week but the week before. 01:58.598 --> 02:00.238 What about the world changing massively? 02:00.778 --> 02:05.040 Yes, speculating about what might happen while we were away and all the things that we would not be able to talk about. 02:05.400 --> 02:09.062 But now we can and we can cover them all in lurid detail. 02:09.762 --> 02:11.004 Obama being sworn in. 02:11.104 --> 02:12.866 I mean, some of these we won't talk about, obviously. 02:13.406 --> 02:14.567 Jonathan Ross returning. 02:15.288 --> 02:17.110 Did you watch his show when he came back? 02:17.210 --> 02:18.131 No, I was in America. 02:18.291 --> 02:19.633 Of course you were. 02:19.673 --> 02:20.954 The Ice Age has begun. 02:21.695 --> 02:22.436 Missed that as well. 02:22.556 --> 02:23.617 In England, we're still going on. 02:24.058 --> 02:26.120 Yeah, melting by the time I got back. 02:26.331 --> 02:30.035 There's still lots of snow lying around everywhere, and it's gonna be bad this week as well. 02:30.115 --> 02:30.316 Is it? 02:30.396 --> 02:30.936 I hope so. 02:31.077 --> 02:32.398 Yeah, I feel like I've missed out. 02:32.458 --> 02:33.119 I want a rerun. 02:33.419 --> 02:43.571 You're gonna get some, uh, Thatcher, Carol Thatcher, racist tirade, uh, Jeremy Clarkson, insane comments about our glorious PM, and of course Christian Bale. 02:43.931 --> 02:46.034 We'll cover some of those topics a bit later on, won't we? 02:46.454 --> 02:46.735 Yes. 02:47.436 --> 02:49.579 And we have great music for you. 02:49.599 --> 02:53.584 We have a special guest in the studio this week that we'll tell you about later on. 02:54.085 --> 02:57.309 We're going to resolve Danny Wallace's song wars. 02:57.369 --> 02:58.891 What was Danny's sidekick called? 02:59.172 --> 02:59.852 Very nice chat. 02:59.892 --> 03:00.193 Gromit. 03:00.794 --> 03:01.515 Wallace and Gromit. 03:01.555 --> 03:02.236 What was his name? 03:02.276 --> 03:02.656 The fella... 03:03.317 --> 03:03.537 Rich Glover. 03:03.557 --> 03:04.058 Rich Glover. 03:04.338 --> 03:05.359 Did you hear them at all? 03:05.459 --> 03:06.019 No, I haven't heard them. 03:06.039 --> 03:06.880 They were very good. 03:06.900 --> 03:07.320 Oh. 03:07.400 --> 03:10.002 I only listened to the beginning, just to keep up with things. 03:10.342 --> 03:16.166 But his sidekick, Rich, was posher than both of us combined. 03:16.206 --> 03:19.128 He effects a certain extra poshness when he's on the radio, I think. 03:19.228 --> 03:19.989 What, the sidekick? 03:20.129 --> 03:20.869 Yeah, Richard. 03:21.009 --> 03:21.490 Do you think? 03:21.590 --> 03:22.890 Yeah, I know Richard. 03:22.970 --> 03:28.452 I've acted and... He sounds posher than you and I, swapped in a matter transference pod with the Queen. 03:28.552 --> 03:31.914 Well, he does a very good impression of, what's his name? 03:32.214 --> 03:32.434 More. 03:32.474 --> 03:33.074 Kenneth More. 03:33.394 --> 03:33.654 Right. 03:33.694 --> 03:35.775 That's one of the things he does when he's doing stand-up. 03:36.516 --> 03:37.736 And it's very funny indeed. 03:37.796 --> 03:39.617 Yes, he kind of talks like this, doesn't he? 03:39.637 --> 03:41.418 He's almost like Prince Charles sometimes. 03:41.458 --> 03:42.378 Too posh to move. 03:42.598 --> 03:42.878 Yeah. 03:43.058 --> 03:45.099 As if he's so classy, he's bedridden. 03:45.279 --> 03:46.219 He's a very nice guy. 03:46.760 --> 03:49.021 And it was a pleasure to be stood in by him. 03:49.141 --> 03:50.261 I'm not saying he's not nice. 03:50.882 --> 03:51.842 Well, what are you saying then? 03:51.862 --> 03:53.163 I'm saying he's posher than us. 03:53.463 --> 03:54.063 Well, he's jealous. 03:54.083 --> 03:54.543 Which is exciting. 03:54.783 --> 03:55.584 No, I'm pleased. 03:56.384 --> 03:57.465 There's someone posher than us. 03:57.505 --> 03:57.725 Yeah. 03:58.305 --> 03:58.885 Well, we're going to hear. 03:58.905 --> 04:01.406 They did songs about who was better, Adam or Joe. 04:01.466 --> 04:02.227 I heard the songs. 04:02.967 --> 04:03.848 I'm telling their listeners. 04:04.168 --> 04:04.388 Yeah. 04:04.588 --> 04:05.308 If they didn't know. 04:05.908 --> 04:06.969 And we're going to hear them later on. 04:06.989 --> 04:07.849 I'm excited to hear that. 04:07.889 --> 04:09.850 We'll be doing that within the next hour, I think. 04:10.270 --> 04:11.571 But now let's play some music. 04:11.871 --> 04:13.612 This is LaRue with Quicksand. 04:13.792 --> 04:15.793 Yes, that's LaRue with Quicksand. 04:15.893 --> 04:18.154 I was hoping that might be Lady Gaga. 04:18.534 --> 04:19.955 Have you heard about Lady Gaga? 04:20.195 --> 04:22.055 Everybody's heard about Lady Gaga. 04:22.075 --> 04:23.496 Have you heard Lady Gaga? 04:23.516 --> 04:25.897 Yeah, I only heard her this morning. 04:26.077 --> 04:26.597 What's she like? 04:28.158 --> 04:29.218 Well, I thought you'd heard her. 04:29.659 --> 04:31.819 Yeah, but just talking just in the street. 04:31.899 --> 04:32.200 Right. 04:32.420 --> 04:33.140 Not actually singing. 04:33.500 --> 04:36.823 She's vocoded quite heavily, which I was a bit disappointed by. 04:37.544 --> 04:39.946 She's supposed to be sort of taking Madonna's crown, right? 04:40.686 --> 04:47.132 She's risen up through the New York clubs, she's done her time properly, you know, she's kind of a performance artist type. 04:47.833 --> 04:52.317 I thought she'd be able to sing, or at least give it a try, but she's heavily vocoded. 04:52.337 --> 04:54.619 Are you excited about her? 04:55.959 --> 04:59.681 Well, I'm very old, it's hard to get excited about anything now except comfy chairs. 04:59.841 --> 05:01.362 Lady Gutt, a good name though, isn't it? 05:01.802 --> 05:02.682 Ga-ga-goo-goo. 05:02.903 --> 05:03.103 Yeah. 05:03.443 --> 05:08.085 You know, pitching it quite simple for the toddlers at the baby market. 05:08.545 --> 05:09.766 Lady Ga-ga. 05:10.766 --> 05:12.766 What would be a simpler name for that? 05:12.906 --> 05:13.667 Mr. Poopoo? 05:14.647 --> 05:15.767 Toddlers would like him. 05:15.887 --> 05:17.167 That's going to be my stage name. 05:17.187 --> 05:17.827 Mr. Poopoo? 05:17.867 --> 05:18.227 Yeah. 05:18.427 --> 05:19.688 Well, I think you'll do very well. 05:19.708 --> 05:20.068 Thank you. 05:20.268 --> 05:26.869 There's a quote from Lady Gaga from the Guardian in Privatize Suits Corner this week. 05:26.909 --> 05:28.589 You know Suits Corner in Privatie? 05:28.609 --> 05:29.249 Right. 05:29.549 --> 05:33.810 Quote, Lady Gaga says, I went to a lovely school and I got an incredible education. 05:34.110 --> 05:38.431 And I actually think that my education is what sets me apart because I'm very smart. 05:38.931 --> 05:39.732 She taps her head. 05:40.693 --> 05:41.113 Smart. 05:41.734 --> 05:47.939 Quote, I don't know that my schooling was conducive to wild ideas and creativity, but it gave me discipline, drive. 05:47.979 --> 05:48.940 They taught me how to think. 05:49.260 --> 05:50.842 I really know how to think. 05:51.462 --> 05:52.583 She searches for an example. 05:52.864 --> 05:57.548 If I decide to make a coat red in the show, it's not just red, she explains. 05:57.868 --> 05:58.289 I think. 05:58.789 --> 05:59.690 Is it communist red? 06:00.090 --> 06:01.070 Is it cherry cordial? 06:01.311 --> 06:02.191 Is it ruby red? 06:02.491 --> 06:03.252 Is it apple red? 06:03.552 --> 06:04.893 Or the big balloon red? 06:05.333 --> 06:07.374 I mean, there's so many different kinds of red. 06:07.774 --> 06:10.456 And so you have to say, well, what are we trying to say in this scene? 06:10.756 --> 06:11.657 Is it a happy red? 06:11.917 --> 06:12.597 A sad red? 06:12.857 --> 06:13.498 A lace red? 06:13.738 --> 06:14.298 A leather red? 06:14.318 --> 06:14.858 A wool red? 06:15.079 --> 06:18.881 It's like there's so many components to making a show and making art and my school taught me how to think that way. 06:19.261 --> 06:20.122 That's a good school. 06:20.162 --> 06:21.483 Where did she go to school, I wonder? 06:21.543 --> 06:22.724 What's big balloon red? 06:23.444 --> 06:24.925 Oh, it's very red. 06:25.085 --> 06:27.547 You know, it's like the balloons they used to have for Milton Keynes. 06:27.587 --> 06:28.308 Was it Milton Keynes? 06:28.328 --> 06:29.568 Does she mean big top red? 06:30.349 --> 06:30.609 No. 06:30.829 --> 06:32.330 No, big red balloons. 06:32.350 --> 06:33.351 Big balloon red. 06:33.371 --> 06:34.452 Yeah, big balloon. 06:34.492 --> 06:35.873 Do you not familiar with big balloon red? 06:35.893 --> 06:37.994 Well, I haven't been educated to the level of Lady Gaga. 06:38.035 --> 06:39.015 I don't know what that means. 06:39.075 --> 06:41.917 I mean, I think it's fair enough to cite big balloon red. 06:41.957 --> 06:43.218 It's like fire engine red. 06:43.258 --> 06:45.360 You know, it's a vivid... Fire engine red, yes. 06:45.740 --> 06:46.481 Big balloon red. 06:47.481 --> 06:48.542 Same sort of thing, yeah. 06:49.763 --> 06:51.023 What about clown nose red? 06:51.164 --> 06:53.065 That would have been acceptable as well. 06:53.245 --> 06:53.525 Yeah. 06:53.605 --> 06:54.926 Just not big balloon red. 06:54.966 --> 06:55.907 Spanked bottom red. 06:56.087 --> 06:57.988 I wish I was as clever as Lady Gaga. 06:58.288 --> 07:02.431 I like people who say, you know, the thing about me is that I'm really intelligent. 07:02.891 --> 07:05.212 I love it when people call attention to how intelligent they are. 07:05.232 --> 07:08.234 It's like when Sylvester Stallone started wearing glasses and doing oil paints. 07:08.575 --> 07:08.695 Yeah. 07:08.715 --> 07:09.255 That kind of thing. 07:09.415 --> 07:30.549 at least intelligence as a career move kind of thing he never actually came out and said I suddenly discovered that I'm very intelligent you pretty much did more or less but it's it's acceptable if you start changing your image I mean it's barely acceptable fair enough but when people actually say you know I have a very high IQ my IQ is unusually high you just think well it's not quite high enough 07:31.329 --> 07:32.930 You realise that's an idiotic thing to say. 07:32.950 --> 07:34.011 Yeah, exactly. 07:34.391 --> 07:34.711 It's fun. 07:34.731 --> 07:35.932 Shall we have some more music? 07:36.212 --> 07:37.593 Yeah, will it be Lady Gaga? 07:37.753 --> 07:38.994 No, unfortunately not. 07:39.014 --> 07:41.815 This is probably Lady Gaga's... What radio station is this? 07:41.975 --> 07:43.076 Great, great granddad. 07:43.096 --> 07:44.437 I know, this is slightly old. 07:45.037 --> 07:46.538 And it's more Van Morrison. 07:46.578 --> 07:48.619 I played some Van Morrison the other day. 07:48.979 --> 07:52.882 But this is not Ringworm or any kind of contractual obligation, Van Morrison. 07:53.182 --> 07:56.364 But it's a lovely slice of early Morrison called Spanish Rose. 07:56.744 --> 07:58.044 I've got a mouthful of carrot, Joe. 07:58.064 --> 07:58.965 Can you fill for a little bit? 07:59.025 --> 08:00.366 Yeah, that was Van Morrison. 08:00.926 --> 08:01.746 What was that one called? 08:01.766 --> 08:02.467 Spanish Rose. 08:02.487 --> 08:02.627 Yeah. 08:03.107 --> 08:03.967 Yeah, that was very nice. 08:03.987 --> 08:04.888 That was Adam's free play. 08:04.908 --> 08:07.089 This is Adam and Joe here on BBC Six Music. 08:07.569 --> 08:18.213 Now we were away for the last two weeks and last Saturday, Danny Wallace filled in and did a very, very good job and did, they did their own song wars, didn't they? 08:18.354 --> 08:18.854 That's right. 08:18.954 --> 08:20.294 Now I got quite upset about that. 08:20.454 --> 08:23.796 I was working in America and I woke up in the middle of the night 08:24.096 --> 08:31.059 And someone sent me an email saying, oh, Danny Wallace and his friend are going to do song wars. 08:31.499 --> 08:34.400 And I suddenly felt that they were stealing our segment. 08:34.960 --> 08:35.860 I felt slighted. 08:36.200 --> 08:38.721 So I fired off quite an angry email, didn't I, Ben? 08:39.462 --> 08:42.723 And it said, I CC'd you as well. 08:43.283 --> 08:44.944 It said, look, I'm quite annoyed. 08:44.964 --> 08:48.365 Does anyone else feel that Wallace is stealing our segment? 08:48.385 --> 08:51.286 There was something else I was annoyed about that was really stupid as well. 08:51.946 --> 08:52.607 What was it, Ben? 08:52.667 --> 08:53.808 Surely you've been scarred by it. 08:54.309 --> 09:01.156 Oh yeah, no, it was the fact that it was not possible for people to vote about our previous improvised song wars. 09:01.176 --> 09:08.665 Yeah, we did improvised song wars the other week and they hadn't been put up on the website and we'd mentioned in the podcast that we were going or in the show we were going to do. 09:09.025 --> 09:13.569 Anyway, these were very silly trivial things, but I got quite angry about them and fired off some furious emails. 09:13.609 --> 09:25.519 I would say that it was justified for you to be slightly miffed about the improvised song wars thing, because yours was so good, but that, in a way, I was pleased about it, because I didn't want people to vote for that, because mine was just barely coherent. 09:25.879 --> 09:26.139 Yeah. 09:26.259 --> 09:29.342 When I improvised my song, you came out with something really quite inspired. 09:29.462 --> 09:31.344 Yeah, I just wanted to get that off my chest anyway. 09:31.564 --> 09:31.784 Yeah. 09:31.804 --> 09:34.806 Just to make it clear that I don't really feel angry about those things. 09:34.887 --> 09:35.487 You can't go down there. 09:35.527 --> 09:41.212 But you know what, now that I've heard Danny and Rich's song wars, I'm angry again. 09:41.452 --> 09:42.113 The glove box. 09:42.153 --> 09:42.773 Why are you angry? 09:43.314 --> 09:44.094 Because they're so good. 09:44.314 --> 09:44.595 Yeah. 09:45.055 --> 09:46.096 And I'm threatened. 09:46.596 --> 09:47.977 Now these songs are about us. 09:48.017 --> 09:52.001 Do we know who picked which... Yeah, Danny went for you and Rich went for me. 09:52.881 --> 10:12.559 and we can't obviously play the full songs again but they did they play them live in the studio they had a guitar and they played them live did they they I hope they did they sang live they sang live over backing tracks and did they you were in the studio at the time were you Ben yes did they have the lyrics written down yes they actually wrote them down 10:14.140 --> 10:14.700 I haven't heard these. 10:14.760 --> 10:18.041 Joe is talking about the fact that they're very, very freeform. 10:18.221 --> 10:24.763 They've, you know, I don't want to sound pompous or anything, but they don't seem to know anything. 10:24.783 --> 10:26.344 They didn't even know anything about us. 10:26.444 --> 10:26.644 Yeah. 10:27.224 --> 10:31.405 If I was writing a song about someone, I would have done a search on Wikipedia. 10:31.685 --> 10:39.667 But you see, very few people with proper jobs and lives are willing to spend three days writing a song for a radio show. 10:40.008 --> 10:40.728 Well, clearly. 10:41.728 --> 10:47.832 Because your song, Danny Wallace's song about you just went along the lines of Adam, Adam, he's brilliant. 10:47.892 --> 10:48.273 It's true. 10:48.573 --> 10:49.513 Adam, he's brilliant. 10:49.533 --> 10:49.894 That's true. 10:50.434 --> 10:52.656 It may have said you had a beard, he's got a beard. 10:52.716 --> 10:53.456 That's also true. 10:53.476 --> 10:54.857 Yeah, and that was pretty much it. 10:54.917 --> 10:56.138 That's factually accurate. 10:56.198 --> 11:01.522 Then Rich's song about me, it missed the brilliant, the stuff about me being brilliant. 11:01.622 --> 11:02.062 I'm sorry. 11:02.222 --> 11:06.505 It just went Joe Cornish, Joe Cornish, he's really, really tall. 11:06.585 --> 11:07.245 That's true. 11:07.325 --> 11:16.151 It referred to me as a sidekick, which I found demeaning, and then it said he's tall, Cornish, I don't know much about him, he's tall, and then it sort of tapered off. 11:16.531 --> 11:21.474 So this explains your obvious latent fury about him earlier in the show. 11:21.494 --> 11:25.356 It's not latent, I told you, they've made me angry again. 11:25.396 --> 11:25.777 Yeah. 11:26.457 --> 11:32.663 And, uh, I just think that not only have they stolen our segment, but they've covertly insulted me. 11:32.904 --> 11:34.265 He called him a sidekick. 11:35.026 --> 11:35.907 That's pretty harsh. 11:36.067 --> 11:37.548 And they withheld the brilliant as well. 11:37.728 --> 11:41.092 Well, let's find out who won now and we're gonna hear the winning song all over again. 11:41.172 --> 11:43.674 Well, I think it's screamingly obvious who's won. 11:44.715 --> 11:48.119 Because, you know, Rich's won only just constituted a song. 11:49.420 --> 11:50.501 Didn't really have a melody. 11:51.281 --> 11:53.523 Richard gets 43%, but Danny wins with 56%. 11:53.943 --> 11:55.224 So quite close. 11:55.344 --> 12:01.168 And Danny and Rich, I don't mean to be, just in case you're listening, I doubt is, but if you are listening, I don't mean to insult you at all. 12:01.208 --> 12:03.890 It's terrific of you to fill in for us and do those songs. 12:03.990 --> 12:04.230 Triff. 12:04.871 --> 12:06.092 It was really triff. 12:06.632 --> 12:11.255 It's just that... Just don't ever look at me and talk to me again. 12:11.275 --> 12:11.956 Yeah, exactly. 12:12.997 --> 12:16.503 You know, if you're gonna sing a song about me, you're gonna make it really flattering. 12:16.523 --> 12:19.548 There was an awful lot of other impressive stuff they could have said about you as well. 12:19.608 --> 12:19.969 I know. 12:20.449 --> 12:23.534 And they just went for Tall and Withheld the Brills. 12:23.815 --> 12:25.618 Anyway, let's hear Danny Wallace's song about me. 12:25.678 --> 12:26.119 We have to. 12:27.935 --> 12:29.936 This is a story about two men. 12:30.176 --> 12:32.136 One is called Adam and is brilliant. 12:32.196 --> 12:34.517 The other is called Joe and he knows Adam. 12:34.777 --> 12:37.398 But really this song is about Adam, the brilliant one I said about. 12:37.438 --> 12:42.979 Joe's goodness almost, like he's quite tall, but being quite tall is not the same as being the same size as Adam. 12:43.660 --> 12:43.760 OK? 12:45.777 --> 13:02.210 I know a man named Adam and he knows another little man named Joe And together they got together and pulled out a digital radio show But enough about Joe, that's all anyone knows, cause the whole world rolls around Adam He's Adam, he's Adam, rhymes include sadam and madam Scradam 13:03.601 --> 13:10.586 Because Adam, oh Adam Buxton, more compact than his sidekick, but only 5% less bucks. 13:10.706 --> 13:14.369 Some his work with the oboe really knows how to reach ya. 13:14.609 --> 13:18.893 He played friendly teacher and son of Rambo, which was spelt wrong, but that's fine. 13:19.193 --> 13:28.000 He wasn't teaching spelling, that would have been a boring film and it was brilliant, but only cause of Adam, little Adam Buxton. 13:28.320 --> 13:30.902 Oh madam, he's a madman, it is Adam. 13:31.482 --> 13:32.623 Scr-scr-scr-Adam. 13:33.704 --> 13:35.505 You see- Yeah, yeah, no, I understand that. 13:35.525 --> 13:41.826 The idea there would be that Richard would have come back with an equally over-the-top flattering song about me, you know? 13:41.986 --> 13:43.347 Well, that wasn't that flattering. 13:43.767 --> 13:47.168 I'm more compact than you was the upshot of that one. 13:47.188 --> 13:49.269 Well, you know, we're both quite sensitive souls. 13:49.729 --> 13:51.989 You're in trouble anyway with the basic premise. 13:53.250 --> 13:57.291 But, I don't know, I feel nothing but bruised and- I don't think they- you know what, I think- 13:57.751 --> 13:59.812 I think they were misusing the word sidekick. 13:59.832 --> 14:03.713 I don't think they were using it to mean, like, the less important of a pair. 14:03.773 --> 14:05.834 I think they were just meaning, like, the other half. 14:05.874 --> 14:10.875 You know, I'm happy to be described as a sidekick, but it's just my other talent. 14:10.955 --> 14:12.396 Also, maybe they meant psychic. 14:12.996 --> 14:15.737 Maybe they meant I was telekinetic psychic. 14:15.777 --> 14:16.677 Yeah, maybe they did. 14:16.697 --> 14:19.018 Because you do have special mind powers. 14:19.118 --> 14:22.439 So that's not going to go on the overall thermometer score chart. 14:22.940 --> 14:24.780 Fundraiser, Blue Peter thermometer, is it? 14:25.080 --> 14:26.541 The overall Song Wars score chart. 14:26.581 --> 14:26.781 No. 14:27.401 --> 14:47.860 no they're not representing us now that's in the past yeah that's that's a freak it's an anomaly can we erase those from the castle vaults but a sincere thank you though to richard lover and to danny wallace for filling in for us yeah uh lots of people came up to me in the week and said how good they were and i had to have the conversation several times about like they weren't they weren't like better than us were they and they were like 14:48.200 --> 14:51.361 Well, they were quite good, was what I heard. 14:51.381 --> 14:52.622 Well, that's a good thing, isn't it? 14:52.642 --> 14:54.423 Because we could maybe take more time off. 14:54.543 --> 14:55.083 That's right. 14:55.323 --> 14:57.324 And they could fill in and that would be all all right. 14:57.664 --> 14:59.005 Get the Yes Man in the glove box in. 14:59.205 --> 14:59.665 Exactly. 14:59.905 --> 15:00.185 Yeah. 15:00.565 --> 15:03.106 Right, this is Adam and Joe here on BBC Six Music. 15:03.427 --> 15:04.767 Here's a bit of M Ward right now. 15:04.827 --> 15:11.290 Ben, our producer, has made... We've got little information sheets that tell us what we're playing and all that kind of thing. 15:11.670 --> 15:17.013 And this week he's gone to town, he's got the colour photocopies, inserted little colour pictures in there and stuff. 15:17.233 --> 15:18.894 There's a picture of M Ward here. 15:19.194 --> 15:24.497 He looks like quite a sort of grumpy man, which doesn't surprise me having heard some of his music. 15:24.718 --> 15:32.722 He's from Portland, Oregon and he's chosen to work under the name M Ward, as this was his nickname when he was younger, it says on Ben's colourful fact sheet. 15:33.142 --> 15:36.444 He says it's more to the point and more formal. 15:36.664 --> 15:37.345 It's a fun fact. 15:37.765 --> 15:38.265 Thanks, Ben. 15:38.786 --> 15:39.506 Good job, man. 15:39.626 --> 15:42.348 And here's M Ward with Never Had a Nobody Like You. 15:42.628 --> 15:43.368 Very good stuff. 15:43.768 --> 15:45.870 M Ward with Never Had a Nobody Like You. 15:45.890 --> 15:50.592 This is Adam and Jo on 6 Music from the BBC, the big British castle. 15:51.173 --> 15:54.855 And it's almost 9.30, almost time for the news. 15:54.895 --> 15:59.737 I want to be absolutely on the, like, dot of 9.30 when I introduce the news. 15:59.757 --> 16:02.319 So I'm going to carry on talking as if I was on just a minute. 16:02.819 --> 16:06.382 for another 10 seconds on the subject of apples. 16:06.442 --> 16:07.242 I love apples. 16:07.683 --> 16:12.086 My favourite kind of apple is the Fuji apple, which I believe comes from a part of Japan. 16:12.126 --> 16:12.827 It's delicious. 16:12.867 --> 16:13.007 It's 9.30. 16:13.727 --> 16:14.448 Time for the news. 16:14.748 --> 16:16.910 Sir Bob Dylan with like a rolling stone. 16:16.930 --> 16:19.471 This is Adam and Jo on BBC 6 Music. 16:19.692 --> 16:19.892 What? 16:20.112 --> 16:21.013 That isn't Bob Dylan. 16:21.433 --> 16:22.374 Do you really think that's Bob Dylan? 16:22.394 --> 16:24.115 It says Bob Dylan like a rolling stone. 16:24.577 --> 16:27.219 That's the Rolling Stones with Tumbling Dice. 16:30.142 --> 16:32.103 It's the new pages you've got to turn over. 16:32.123 --> 16:34.686 That was the Rolling Stones with Tumbling Dice. 16:35.146 --> 16:36.187 Come on Grandad. 16:36.407 --> 16:36.887 Oh dear. 16:38.589 --> 16:46.516 Now listen, a couple of weeks ago listeners, or in fact I think it was three weeks ago, we had an email from a gentleman called Ollie Blake. 16:47.136 --> 16:56.257 who wrote the following can I come on your show please don't want to say anything just want to be there and feel the magic swirling around the studio whoosh thanks Ollie Blake 16:57.771 --> 17:00.833 Um, so we arranged for him to come into the studio, didn't we? 17:00.913 --> 17:02.514 But then that week he was ill. 17:02.955 --> 17:04.095 He claimed that he was ill. 17:04.376 --> 17:09.739 So we had him on the phone and he was only allowed to communicate by scratching the receiver. 17:10.159 --> 17:10.420 Yeah. 17:10.640 --> 17:16.023 And you're being very strict about this, so if it was up to me, I would sort of just let the guy speak and stuff. 17:16.043 --> 17:19.566 But you've been fairly hard line about the fact that he shouldn't make any noise. 17:19.606 --> 17:19.866 Yeah, yeah. 17:19.906 --> 17:22.187 Well, the email said, can I come on your show, please? 17:22.328 --> 17:23.688 I don't want to say anything. 17:23.809 --> 17:27.391 But why then do you think it's a good idea to get that person on a radio program? 17:27.851 --> 17:30.253 because it's exciting and more interesting. 17:30.453 --> 17:33.675 And, you know, some of the best radio is the theatre of the mind, right? 17:33.815 --> 17:34.015 Is it? 17:34.115 --> 17:34.435 Yeah. 17:34.515 --> 17:34.755 Yeah. 17:35.115 --> 17:35.396 You know? 17:35.416 --> 17:36.856 Like what? 17:37.157 --> 17:38.137 Which kind of programme? 17:38.297 --> 17:51.565 When I did my training for Radio 4 for the film show, they told me that it was actually quite good to describe visual stuff, like a painting or a scene in a film, because radio is very good at painting pictures in people's heads. 17:51.625 --> 17:54.907 It's like, you know, reading a book and imagining the characters. 17:55.487 --> 18:00.428 And it's apparently, I was told in my training, something that people sometimes avoid, that they shouldn't. 18:01.008 --> 18:02.169 And it's actually quite good. 18:02.449 --> 18:10.671 So I'm thinking that Ollie, if we treat him as a visual work rather than an aural work, it might be exciting for the listeners. 18:10.891 --> 18:15.092 Because this week, the point of this whole thing is this week he is here in the studio. 18:15.152 --> 18:15.632 He's come 18:16.312 --> 18:19.437 all the way from the place where he lives somewhere near Stansted. 18:20.058 --> 18:25.966 We could ask him where he lives, but of course, if he said anything, we would have to eject him immediately from the studio. 18:26.387 --> 18:30.292 Looking at him, I would say that he comes from near Stansted Hairport. 18:32.274 --> 18:37.056 If you want to look at Ollie, you can go on the Six Music website and look on the webcam. 18:37.536 --> 18:40.637 He's not facing the webcam at the moment, so you'll get who he is now. 18:40.717 --> 18:42.617 Stand up and face the webcam, Ollie. 18:42.737 --> 18:43.298 Please, Ollie. 18:43.338 --> 18:43.818 And don't move. 18:44.218 --> 18:50.680 And we explained to Ollie, you have to stand there for a while because it uploads, it refreshes every few, like 20 seconds or whatever. 18:50.980 --> 18:57.322 We explained to Ollie that we may well sort of treat him in a slightly demeaning or humiliating fashion just because of the nature of 18:58.022 --> 19:00.064 this interview that we're conducting. 19:00.324 --> 19:01.265 Can we call it an interview? 19:02.105 --> 19:04.587 It might turn into an interview, yeah. 19:04.927 --> 19:06.288 And he's fine with that. 19:06.368 --> 19:08.010 He signed a waiver and a disclaimer. 19:08.030 --> 19:13.333 There's no way he's going to turn around in three weeks and suddenly claim that the evil BBC has ruined his life. 19:13.594 --> 19:14.094 As possible. 19:15.695 --> 19:17.656 Uh, I would describe him as tall. 19:17.716 --> 19:18.756 Is he as tall as you, Joe? 19:18.896 --> 19:19.176 No. 19:19.256 --> 19:19.636 No, not quite. 19:19.656 --> 19:20.496 No one's as tall as me. 19:20.537 --> 19:21.997 No one's as tall as Joe Cornish. 19:22.457 --> 19:23.277 He's pretty tall. 19:23.437 --> 19:27.118 He looks as if he's from a... The kings of Leon, maybe. 19:27.258 --> 19:27.559 Right. 19:27.919 --> 19:28.539 Maybe... Is that bad? 19:28.619 --> 19:30.639 He's looking a bit... He's looking a bit miffed. 19:30.880 --> 19:35.281 Well, he looks a bit more Devendra Bernhardt than kings of Leon, I would say. 19:35.341 --> 19:36.641 He looks as if he doesn't know who that is. 19:36.681 --> 19:37.401 He nearly spoke. 19:37.542 --> 19:38.182 Careful, Ollie. 19:38.642 --> 19:42.223 Uh, he's more a kind of folk, a beardy, folky pixie man. 19:42.971 --> 19:50.535 I asked him to bring in some stuff which he could communicate with, make some noises with, so he's bought in a wooden spoon and a frying pan. 19:51.615 --> 20:00.019 So, Ollie, when we spoke to you on the phone, we had a one knock for yes, two knocks for no thing going, didn't we? 20:00.779 --> 20:02.380 So, welcome to the studio, Ollie. 20:04.950 --> 20:05.170 Yes. 20:05.891 --> 20:06.591 There he is. 20:07.031 --> 20:08.752 Are you enjoying your time here so far? 20:10.994 --> 20:11.634 Yes, he is. 20:12.495 --> 20:13.455 What else can we ask him? 20:15.076 --> 20:16.898 Is this exactly as you expected? 20:17.698 --> 20:19.739 Yes, as you expected. 20:20.840 --> 20:21.400 Yes, it is. 20:21.420 --> 20:24.862 It's exactly as you expected. 20:25.063 --> 20:30.546 And you said you wanted to be here and feel the magic swirling around the studio. 20:30.866 --> 20:32.067 Can you feel any magic? 20:35.781 --> 20:40.104 Take a bit of thinking about he's thinking about the second one there, but he's sticking with yes. 20:40.464 --> 20:40.924 That's good. 20:40.965 --> 20:47.129 That's the correct answer That's the best way to go if you don't want to antagonize us necessarily unnecessarily ollie It's very exciting to have you here. 20:47.149 --> 20:57.337 We're going to be speaking at you further in along in the program Well done and remember if you want to look at ollie, then you can do so on the webcam How old would you say ollie is? 20:57.777 --> 20:59.278 Me, I'd say he was about 24, 25. 21:00.578 --> 21:03.839 Are you 25, Ollie? 21:03.859 --> 21:03.839 21. 21:04.540 --> 21:06.180 21. 21:04.880 --> 21:06.180 You're 21. 21:06.320 --> 21:06.460 He's 21. 21:06.620 --> 21:08.261 That's a good beard for 21. 21:08.501 --> 21:08.821 Yeah. 21:09.821 --> 21:10.562 He's got a beard. 21:10.582 --> 21:10.562 21. 21:11.842 --> 21:13.603 He's half our age. 21:13.903 --> 21:14.163 Is he? 21:14.403 --> 21:14.883 Pretty much. 21:15.484 --> 21:16.144 Not really. 21:16.384 --> 21:17.084 Wow. 21:17.144 --> 21:18.345 Those couple of years count. 21:19.905 --> 21:20.325 That's good. 21:20.385 --> 21:21.126 Well done, Ollie. 21:21.846 --> 21:24.427 If you're hoping to hear Ollie, then you're out of luck. 21:25.708 --> 21:27.029 He's making a giggling noise. 21:28.070 --> 21:29.912 You're not going to hear any Ollie throughout the show. 21:31.013 --> 21:34.416 And Ollie, did you hear me referring to you as Ollie the Wally a few weeks back? 21:35.177 --> 21:36.018 Were you upset about that? 21:39.500 --> 21:39.820 No. 21:39.880 --> 21:41.841 He doesn't look like he means that, though. 21:41.881 --> 21:45.002 He was putting a face as if maybe he was a little bit hurt. 21:45.362 --> 21:48.124 We'll be back with Ollie later on in the programme. 21:48.664 --> 21:50.265 We're going to play some more music right now, though. 21:50.625 --> 21:57.628 This is Empire of the Sun, which actually could get us into a bit of Christian Bale news, couldn't it, after this? 21:58.148 --> 21:58.848 I say news. 21:59.028 --> 22:03.390 It's not exactly news, but we have things to say about it, or at least I do. 22:03.870 --> 22:05.651 I'd like to hear your opinions about the whole thing. 22:06.291 --> 22:10.455 But this is the band Empire of the Sun, who I believe used to be the Sleepy Jackson. 22:10.495 --> 22:12.056 It's the guy from Sleepy Jackson, isn't it? 22:12.496 --> 22:20.803 And he's rebranded himself as a kind of more ridiculous version of the Sleepy Jackson, and they're all painted up, and they look like Aztec ponces. 22:21.464 --> 22:27.529 They look like a combination of MGMT and the Mighty Boosh, and something even more ludicrous looking than that. 22:27.929 --> 22:29.290 I haven't heard any of it yet, though. 22:29.330 --> 22:32.193 I'm interested to hear what walking on a dream sounds like. 22:32.253 --> 22:32.573 Here it is. 22:32.813 --> 22:35.095 There you go, that's Bob Dylan, again. 22:35.716 --> 22:36.537 Like a Rolling Stone. 22:36.557 --> 22:37.998 Like a Rolling Stone, brilliant. 22:38.318 --> 22:40.640 All the big Dylan tracks here on BBC Six Music. 22:40.740 --> 22:47.907 Empire of the Sun, that was with Walking on a Dream, the new weedy sound of the 80s, back again for your listening pleasure. 22:48.007 --> 22:48.768 I enjoyed that though. 22:48.868 --> 22:49.849 Yeah, I like that as well. 22:50.009 --> 22:50.589 That was very good. 22:50.609 --> 22:52.590 This is Adam and Joe here on BBC Six Music. 22:52.930 --> 22:59.934 Now, unless you've been living under a rock for the last week or so, which actually a lot of people seem to have been. 22:59.954 --> 23:02.675 I was in the large gathering of people last night. 23:02.695 --> 23:04.076 I don't know if you've ever met any people, Joe. 23:04.096 --> 23:04.676 They're amazing. 23:04.896 --> 23:07.297 They're all different shapes, sizes, colours, that kind of thing. 23:07.317 --> 23:08.638 They have different opinions and clothes. 23:08.658 --> 23:08.858 Right. 23:09.379 --> 23:13.641 And a surprising number of them were not aware of the fact that the actor Christian Bale 23:14.842 --> 23:18.647 had a tirade recorded last July. 23:18.667 --> 23:19.909 What was this large group of people? 23:19.929 --> 23:22.212 It was the second time you mentioned it this morning. 23:22.452 --> 23:23.774 It was the first time on air. 23:24.134 --> 23:25.496 Well, they were just people. 23:25.716 --> 23:26.798 You know, party people. 23:26.878 --> 23:27.999 A party, a dinner party. 23:28.040 --> 23:28.700 It was like a party. 23:28.720 --> 23:30.803 There wasn't a dinner party, it was like a birthday party. 23:30.823 --> 23:31.765 A birthday party. 23:32.465 --> 23:36.389 And I would say that certainly there was no one younger than me there. 23:36.529 --> 23:36.789 Right. 23:37.269 --> 23:39.992 So it was a fairly middle-aged gathering. 23:40.092 --> 23:40.352 Right. 23:40.792 --> 23:49.299 But they weren't, you know, and I would imagine that most of our listeners here would have heard the Christian Bale tape that has been circulated on the internet. 23:49.339 --> 23:57.606 If you haven't heard it, and you're listening to this program, let me tell you that this was something that was recorded when Christian Bale was filming a film called Terminator 4. 23:58.667 --> 23:59.889 What is it? 23:59.989 --> 24:01.191 Salvation. 24:01.271 --> 24:07.979 Terminator 4 Salvation, directed by Mcgee, who directed Charlie's Angels, among other wonderful things. 24:08.720 --> 24:14.308 And he was filming last July when this incident occurred, and it was a stressful time for Bale anyway, wasn't it, I think. 24:14.548 --> 24:14.868 Was it? 24:14.948 --> 24:15.749 Apparently so. 24:15.929 --> 24:17.631 He was having lots of personal problems. 24:17.651 --> 24:17.891 Right. 24:18.512 --> 24:28.761 And one day his anger and his passion and intensity, which served him so well as an actor in his many roles, spilled over and was directed at a lighting guy. 24:28.781 --> 24:29.842 No, the DOP, wasn't it? 24:30.362 --> 24:30.542 Yeah. 24:30.722 --> 24:45.926 Who had stepped into the, like, and Christian Bale's eye line, so the camera was on Bale, but Bale, who was looking at the actor Bryce Dallas Howard, could also see the DOP walking behind her, and it kind of put him off his swing. 24:46.166 --> 24:54.909 Apparently, it was one of the most intense scenes of the film, which required, you know, Bale to be in a pitch of feverish excitement, and it totally threw him off. 24:55.129 --> 24:59.750 So he went nuts at the DOP, who was called Shane Hurlbut. 25:00.730 --> 25:05.872 And the exchange was captured on sound tape. 25:07.092 --> 25:08.093 Is that what they use in the movie? 25:08.133 --> 25:08.393 Yes. 25:08.733 --> 25:09.133 Sound tape. 25:09.293 --> 25:09.973 Well described. 25:10.614 --> 25:13.275 And the tape has just recently been circulated. 25:13.295 --> 25:16.976 It's a bit weird that suddenly it's just come to light like in the last week or so. 25:17.036 --> 25:17.676 Why would that be? 25:17.736 --> 25:19.657 Is someone trying to stitch him up, I wonder? 25:19.817 --> 25:21.097 Has there been speculation about that? 25:21.337 --> 25:22.038 There hasn't actually. 25:22.058 --> 25:22.758 That's a good question. 25:23.078 --> 25:36.463 Anyway, you told me that he apologized recently, because he really goes mad at this guy, and refuses to accept the DOP's apology, and just keeps on going on and on about what a useless amateur this guy is. 25:37.563 --> 25:51.388 And in fact, I was thinking that maybe, because we can't play any clips, someone was saying they played a clip accidentally on the BBC, on BBC One yesterday morning on the Breakfast Show or whatever, and they forgot to edit out all the profanity, of which there is a great deal. 25:52.088 --> 25:53.369 but we're not going to take that chance. 25:53.629 --> 26:03.595 What we're going to do for you listeners is a special re-staged version of the Christian Bale tirade, but this is how it would be if I was involved with it, I would think, you know? 26:03.615 --> 26:05.656 I can imagine I'm on the set of Hot Fuzz. 26:05.676 --> 26:08.637 Let's face it, you've had your fair share of tirades on this programme. 26:08.777 --> 26:09.398 Yeah, exactly. 26:10.018 --> 26:18.467 And I can completely relate to Bale as an actor, as a fellow actor, and as another actor who is very intense in many of his roles, like I am. 26:19.228 --> 26:24.794 I completely related to Bale going nuts on Shane Hurlbut's butt. 26:25.474 --> 26:27.595 And we're going to recreate this moment for you right now. 26:27.715 --> 26:30.357 Joe, you're going to play the part of Shane Hurlbut. 26:30.597 --> 26:31.397 How do you want me to do it? 26:31.417 --> 26:32.118 The DOP. 26:32.178 --> 26:32.658 I don't know, man. 26:32.678 --> 26:33.919 You just feel your way through it. 26:33.939 --> 26:35.539 I mean, you've heard the tape, right? 26:35.579 --> 26:36.080 Yes, I have. 26:36.140 --> 26:38.061 He's fairly deferential in the tape. 26:38.101 --> 26:38.721 Yep, yep, yep. 26:39.141 --> 26:40.122 He's quite intimidated. 26:40.482 --> 26:42.963 And then you're also going to be playing Bruce Franklin. 26:43.043 --> 26:44.004 Who's he, the producer? 26:44.704 --> 26:45.745 I don't know who he is. 26:46.805 --> 26:54.030 Well, he's Bruce Franklin pops up every now and again and also much G. You're gonna be playing the director He is yeah, he's genius. 26:54.671 --> 26:56.392 Is he called Mcgee because he's a Mcgenius. 26:57.032 --> 26:57.293 Yes. 26:57.473 --> 26:58.373 Yes, correct. 26:58.794 --> 26:59.074 Okay. 26:59.134 --> 26:59.594 Are you ready? 26:59.874 --> 27:04.418 Yes, I'm ready Okay, so we the tirade begins right in the middle 27:05.478 --> 27:06.979 KICK YOUR FLIPPIN' BUM! 27:07.220 --> 27:07.740 Christian? 27:08.181 --> 27:08.661 Christian? 27:08.681 --> 27:11.203 No, I want you off the flippin' set, you pranit! 27:11.564 --> 27:12.364 Christian, I'm sorry. 27:12.545 --> 27:13.886 No, no, don't just be sorry. 27:14.166 --> 27:15.527 Think for one flippin' second. 27:15.807 --> 27:17.489 What the flip are you doing? 27:17.629 --> 27:18.730 Are you professional or not? 27:18.910 --> 27:19.491 Yes, I am. 27:19.671 --> 27:21.032 No, no, don't- wha- what? 27:21.292 --> 27:25.156 Do I flippin' walk around and- Christian, Christian- No, no, no, shut the flip up, Bruce. 27:25.536 --> 27:27.278 No, no, don't shut me up! 27:27.318 --> 27:28.099 I'm not shutting you up. 27:29.431 --> 27:30.092 Well, don't! 27:30.712 --> 27:34.395 Yeah, am I gonna walk around then and rip your flippin' lights down in the middle of a scene? 27:34.415 --> 27:40.300 Then why the flip are you walking right through... Like this in the background. 27:40.480 --> 27:41.941 I mean, what the flip is it with you? 27:42.262 --> 27:53.771 Why, what don't you flippin' understand if you've got any flippin' idea about, hey, it's flippin' distracting, having someone walking up behind Bryce in the middle of the flippin' scene, giving me a flippin', you know, give me a flippin' answer! 27:54.051 --> 27:55.212 What don't you get about it? 27:56.032 --> 27:57.033 I was looking at the light. 27:57.374 --> 28:00.716 Oh good for you good for and how was it was it? 28:00.857 --> 28:03.599 Was it I hope it was flippin good because it's useless now, isn't it? 28:04.099 --> 28:05.080 Flip say man. 28:05.120 --> 28:11.746 I mean you're an amateur, but gee, but gee Have you got any have you got flippin something to say about this planetarium? 28:12.647 --> 28:15.909 Somebody should be flippin watching and keeping an eye on him 28:16.850 --> 28:21.292 Well, you know, it's the second time, and he doesn't give a flip about what's going on in front of the camera. 28:21.492 --> 28:27.174 I'm trying to be flipping, doing a scene here, and I'm going, why the flip is Shane walking around there? 28:27.194 --> 28:28.175 What's he doing? 28:28.595 --> 28:29.475 You know, do you understand? 28:29.515 --> 28:31.616 My mind is not in the scene if you're doing that! 28:31.976 --> 28:33.397 Look, I absolutely apologise. 28:33.537 --> 28:35.337 I'm sorry, I did not mean anything right. 28:35.357 --> 28:37.818 Well, stay off the flipping set, man, for flip's sake! 28:38.519 --> 28:39.299 Right, let's go again. 28:39.739 --> 28:40.599 Let's just take a minute. 28:40.720 --> 28:41.420 No, let's not! 28:41.480 --> 28:42.840 Take a flippin' minute! 28:43.061 --> 28:44.241 Let's go again! 28:44.681 --> 28:45.562 You're unbelievable! 28:45.602 --> 28:47.703 You are un-flippin' believable! 28:47.963 --> 28:51.504 Number of times, you're strolling around and flipping around in the background. 28:51.824 --> 28:54.446 I have never had a DOP behave like this. 28:54.486 --> 28:57.767 I mean, you don't flippin' understand what it's like working with actors. 28:57.807 --> 28:58.467 That's what it is. 28:58.848 --> 28:59.788 That is what it is, man. 28:59.828 --> 29:00.528 I'm telling you. 29:00.728 --> 29:01.669 I'm not asking. 29:01.929 --> 29:02.889 I'm telling you. 29:03.230 --> 29:04.870 You would not have done that otherwise. 29:05.371 --> 29:08.592 No, look, what it is, I'm just looking at the light and making sure that you're not 29:10.745 --> 29:10.885 Right! 29:11.526 --> 29:11.826 Right! 29:11.986 --> 29:12.866 This is when he kicks off. 29:12.886 --> 29:13.407 Is that real? 29:13.567 --> 29:15.368 Yeah, I accidentally fell off my chair there. 29:16.088 --> 29:16.489 Kick off. 29:16.969 --> 29:17.229 Right! 29:18.170 --> 29:19.130 I'm gonna kick off. 29:19.611 --> 29:23.853 I am going to flippin' kick your flippin' bottom if you don't shut up for a second, alright? 29:24.394 --> 29:25.755 Do it one more flippin' time. 29:25.775 --> 29:28.036 I'm walking off this set if you're still hired. 29:28.296 --> 29:29.217 I am flippin' serious. 29:29.497 --> 29:30.558 You're a nice guy. 29:31.198 --> 29:37.882 You're a nice guy, but don't flippin' cut it when you're bullpooping and flippin' around like this on the set. 29:38.222 --> 29:39.603 I ain't the one walkin', all right? 29:39.823 --> 29:43.466 Let's get Tom and put this thing back on and let's go again. 29:43.486 --> 29:48.429 Seriously, man, you and me, we're flippin' done professionally, you flippin' bottom. 29:49.409 --> 29:53.632 That was like Justin Lee Collins having some kind of a fit. 29:53.732 --> 29:58.475 Yeah, it's a little bit as if JLC was in his first movie role, which will happen at some point. 29:59.861 --> 30:01.002 And that was recreated. 30:01.122 --> 30:02.803 I just fell off my chair and hurt my hand. 30:02.823 --> 30:04.204 That was so dramatic. 30:04.224 --> 30:05.265 I got really into it. 30:05.285 --> 30:06.606 I got so overexcited. 30:06.886 --> 30:08.728 Because I can totally sympathise, you know. 30:08.948 --> 30:11.209 But you know, Christian Bale is from Bournemouth. 30:11.249 --> 30:12.270 Wasn't he born in Bournemouth? 30:12.751 --> 30:13.411 Is he Welsh? 30:13.671 --> 30:17.014 No, he was born in Bournemouth and then brought up, I think, his parents divorced. 30:17.034 --> 30:20.696 So he was brought up half in southern England and half in California. 30:20.776 --> 30:20.977 Yeah. 30:21.297 --> 30:25.160 So one of the funniest things about the actual recording is the way his accent goes all over the shop. 30:25.540 --> 30:27.922 Well, when did his accent become so Americanised? 30:28.422 --> 30:31.823 I think it was always Americanised when he was a kid. 30:31.883 --> 30:32.723 No, it wasn't. 30:32.763 --> 30:36.324 Yeah, it was, because his parents were divorced and he was half-bought up in America. 30:36.464 --> 30:38.584 But in Empire of the Sun he's very English. 30:38.704 --> 30:40.204 Because he's acting. 30:40.324 --> 30:41.165 He's acting! 30:41.625 --> 30:44.185 He's playing an actual British child. 30:44.505 --> 30:48.626 So he changes his voice to adopt the part of the British person. 30:48.666 --> 30:49.286 Yes. 30:49.306 --> 30:50.266 That's how it works. 30:50.306 --> 30:51.627 That's how actors work. 30:53.067 --> 30:53.808 Um, there we go. 30:53.828 --> 30:55.250 Well, that was extremely powerful. 30:55.711 --> 31:00.597 Adam performed that with such energy that he actually came off his chair and injured himself. 31:00.617 --> 31:01.698 My chair and hurt my hand. 31:01.798 --> 31:03.060 I think we should have a little bit of music. 31:03.080 --> 31:05.183 This is a free choice from me. 31:05.243 --> 31:07.466 This is Dudley Perkins with testing me. 31:07.786 --> 31:08.407 Very well done. 31:08.507 --> 31:17.774 This little session there from the Ravenettes, they were playing in the hub for Gideon Ko on the 15th of July 2005, and that track was called Love in a Trash Can. 31:17.814 --> 31:27.101 This is Adam and Jo here on BBC 6 Music, and we are joined in the studio by our silent guest, Ollie, aka Ollie the Wally. 31:27.401 --> 31:36.410 Ollie, now you witnessed that extraordinary piece of theatre that happened there with Adam doing the... restaging the Christian Bale outburst. 31:36.470 --> 31:38.271 I was saying that I pitched it too high. 31:38.351 --> 31:41.254 I wanted to... the whole point of doing it was... We're not doing it again. 31:41.334 --> 31:44.777 ...was that it was supposed to be a bit more pathetic than that, but I went in too hard. 31:44.797 --> 31:44.998 Right. 31:45.598 --> 31:47.199 And I think I've broken my hand. 31:47.719 --> 31:49.360 Let's let Ollie be the judge of that. 31:49.480 --> 31:52.741 Ollie, do you think that was a successful piece of radio? 31:52.761 --> 31:54.822 I mean, hang on, it's a long question. 31:54.842 --> 31:59.684 It's going to be quite a complicated question that's going to require a yes or no answer. 31:59.704 --> 32:02.646 Do you think that was a successful piece of radio? 32:02.946 --> 32:07.027 And do you think when Adam fell off the chair, how did you feel? 32:10.834 --> 32:13.097 You can tap out the rhythm if you want. 32:13.117 --> 32:13.958 Oh, that's interesting. 32:14.539 --> 32:15.820 So that's, it's confused. 32:15.860 --> 32:23.630 It's a sort of yes and no, which meant that you were confused by the whole thing, which is, I think, a fair representation of probably the majority of the audience. 32:25.232 --> 32:27.154 None of my grand plans ever will work out. 32:27.394 --> 32:28.355 No, a lot of them do. 32:28.656 --> 32:29.417 You can't win them all. 32:29.497 --> 32:30.238 I thought it was good. 32:31.144 --> 32:32.225 I went in too hard. 32:32.465 --> 32:33.246 It was good. 32:33.326 --> 32:39.111 If there's any nurses listening that can treat a sprained or broken hand, I would really appreciate your assistance. 32:40.172 --> 32:45.317 Let me further describe Ollie for our listeners, just to shift the emphasis onto him for a second. 32:45.937 --> 32:47.058 You know who he reminds me of? 32:47.098 --> 32:50.201 And I was trying to pin it down as soon as I met him, and I just suddenly remembered. 32:50.681 --> 32:52.883 He is like Naboo from the Mighty Boosh. 32:53.684 --> 32:54.164 Is he now? 32:54.264 --> 32:55.465 He's taller than Naboo. 32:55.685 --> 32:56.546 Yeah, he's taller. 32:56.926 --> 32:59.927 But he's definitely got something of the Naboo about him. 33:00.528 --> 33:05.510 Imagine Naboo with a beard and a bit more hair and a cool leather jacket and no turban. 33:06.191 --> 33:08.532 I would say that is a fair description of Ollie. 33:08.792 --> 33:18.681 Do you know what, when I look at someone like Ollie, who is a good looking man, very well turned out, very well dressed, I wonder what you were like before you settled on that look. 33:19.181 --> 33:19.742 Do you know what I mean? 33:19.842 --> 33:24.586 I'm sure you're a man who hasn't always looked as well groomed and sort of as well presented. 33:25.066 --> 33:31.269 Because you could have stepped off the cover of the NME, or out of a thrusting new indie band, right? 33:31.309 --> 33:32.210 If you scowled a bit. 33:32.230 --> 33:33.150 These are all compliments. 33:33.170 --> 33:42.435 Because Ollie's quite a smiley person, although we've been talking about our favourite films, and he revealed to me that he doesn't like feel-good films. 33:42.475 --> 33:46.737 In fact, his favourite film is 28 Days Later, which is by no means a feel-good film. 33:47.417 --> 33:50.079 So at the moment, Ollie's going through quite a dark phase, I think. 33:51.079 --> 33:53.861 We're catching him in his sort of evil face. 33:54.281 --> 33:55.342 He's got his evil beard. 33:56.182 --> 33:58.263 There's something of the cult leader about him, you know? 33:58.503 --> 33:59.604 A little bit of the Manson. 33:59.624 --> 34:00.104 Yeah. 34:00.925 --> 34:03.206 He had a little swastika on his forehead. 34:03.306 --> 34:04.406 That would be a bad idea. 34:04.467 --> 34:05.627 Now you're just being rude. 34:06.328 --> 34:11.430 Have you ever felt like forming a sort of murderous sex cult, Ollie? 34:11.470 --> 34:11.871 Come on. 34:12.871 --> 34:14.995 Yeah, that's the correct answer. 34:15.055 --> 34:16.076 That was two yeses. 34:18.861 --> 34:20.563 Let's play some more music right now. 34:21.004 --> 34:22.146 Here's Franz Ferdinand. 34:22.266 --> 34:23.628 They're so hot right now! 34:24.009 --> 34:26.433 Do you enjoy the new sound of Franz Ferdinand, Ollie? 34:27.992 --> 34:29.332 Oh, come on. 34:29.812 --> 34:31.813 This is what she came for. 34:32.073 --> 34:34.173 Franz Ferdinand, what she came for. 34:34.333 --> 34:35.913 You know, I'm not so sure about that one. 34:35.933 --> 34:38.474 I was more of a fan of Ulysses than that one. 34:38.634 --> 34:38.914 Right. 34:39.234 --> 34:41.714 Ulysses. 34:42.255 --> 34:47.055 But, you know, that was all good, clean fun from the mighty Franz Ferdinand there. 34:47.075 --> 34:48.776 This is Adam and Joe here on BBC Six Music. 34:49.096 --> 34:56.157 Now, Joe, the other day I was on the train coming to London from Norwich and I went to sleep. 34:56.237 --> 35:08.566 because I was very tired, had quite a sleepless night with the baby the night before and I nodded off and when I woke up there was a little piece of newspaper, scrap of newspaper. 35:08.586 --> 35:10.408 Thank God for that, I thought you were going to say something else. 35:11.969 --> 35:15.890 There was a little scrap of newspaper on the table next to me on the train. 35:16.810 --> 35:20.651 And someone had written Adam on it, with a little smiley face underneath. 35:21.532 --> 35:25.093 And inside I opened it up and it said, Stephen! 35:26.173 --> 35:28.013 Or is it Stephen? 35:28.073 --> 35:32.455 So the person had spelt it both ways, P-H and E-V-E-N. 35:34.315 --> 35:49.505 Strange that, because we've had a text message that reads as follows, Dear Adam and Joe, I was in the queue at a shop in Norwich station yesterday buying my journey sandwich when who should walk past me but Adam Buxton in the flesh as opposed to a hologram or an actor playing you. 35:50.186 --> 35:54.369 I was quite excited and then more so when I realised that we were in the same carriage 35:55.546 --> 35:59.447 I really wanted to say something, but didn't want to disturb Adam or draw attention by doing a Steven. 35:59.847 --> 36:04.308 So, in spy-like ninja fashion, I wrote it on a little piece of paper and made my move. 36:04.708 --> 36:09.169 It was perfect as you were sleeping, Adam, when I walked past and I dropped it on your table. 36:09.369 --> 36:10.230 But did you get it? 36:10.730 --> 36:18.271 When you walked past me to get off the train, I wanted to say hello, or at least smile, but suddenly became very shy and worried that you might have felt a bit stalked. 36:18.672 --> 36:19.972 And then I wanted to give you a wave. 36:20.672 --> 36:39.847 and when you walk past the window but you must have gone the other way as I never saw you again and my elation quickly turned to deflation I should have told you how much Jason my fiance and I love the show Jason how much it makes us laugh in our little hut in chroma but I didn't and I'm so and then the message ends it must continue on a different message 36:40.427 --> 36:41.168 We need to find that other message. 36:41.188 --> 36:42.729 We don't know the name of the person, even. 36:42.749 --> 36:45.991 Do you know what that sounds like to me as a trained psychologist? 36:46.031 --> 36:46.872 Yeah, Dr. Villag. 36:46.932 --> 36:48.133 Dr. Villag. 36:48.173 --> 36:51.295 This anonymous texter is in love with you. 36:51.716 --> 36:51.996 Right. 36:52.356 --> 36:54.157 And would rather marry you than Jason. 36:54.238 --> 36:54.598 Jason. 36:55.318 --> 36:57.440 And wanted to say that to you. 36:57.660 --> 36:57.880 Yeah. 36:58.000 --> 37:07.448 But was so consumed by love and affection and passion and confusion and fury and all the things that one feels when one's around you. 37:07.468 --> 37:07.628 Adam. 37:09.769 --> 37:12.790 that she was unable to contain herself. 37:12.810 --> 37:15.971 You know what, I'm almost certain I know who the person is. 37:16.391 --> 37:20.072 What, you recall looking at them or you actually know them socially? 37:20.252 --> 37:32.435 No, I recall looking at this lady who was sat a few seats in front of me and she sort of held my gaze for a while in a way that I thought maybe was a, you know, it was a recognizing one. 37:33.295 --> 37:35.937 But I didn't obviously acknowledge it because you don't what was she like? 37:36.257 --> 37:37.978 She was really quite attractive. 37:38.078 --> 37:38.358 Really? 37:38.378 --> 37:48.985 Yeah, any other distinguishing factors that could she look like a Less mousy Jodie Foster, right? 37:50.366 --> 37:56.089 she was very beautiful and That's annoying that she's got a fiance there. 37:56.510 --> 37:56.970 Mind you. 37:57.230 --> 37:58.431 I am married with three children. 37:58.511 --> 37:58.631 So 37:58.931 --> 38:01.853 Yeah, and you've already got the Icelandic model lined up. 38:02.813 --> 38:04.094 Just trying to keep my options open. 38:04.114 --> 38:06.736 Your unfaithful list is getting longer by the week. 38:07.016 --> 38:12.199 So what I did, though, was I responded on the little scrap of paper. 38:12.239 --> 38:12.879 You responded it? 38:13.060 --> 38:13.900 Yes, I responded it. 38:14.040 --> 38:14.260 Yes. 38:14.420 --> 38:19.684 With a green pen, I circled the correct spelling of Stephen, which is, of course, S-T-E-P-H-U. 38:19.704 --> 38:20.084 Green. 38:20.424 --> 38:21.465 The colour of passion. 38:21.525 --> 38:22.065 That's right. 38:22.565 --> 38:23.486 I think it's envy, isn't it? 38:24.607 --> 38:27.753 And then I, you know, sign my name underneath. 38:27.793 --> 38:28.955 And what did you do with it? 38:29.055 --> 38:29.997 Well, I just left it there. 38:30.017 --> 38:30.718 I didn't know exactly. 38:30.738 --> 38:31.800 You just left it on the table. 38:31.840 --> 38:32.701 Deliver it to, yeah. 38:32.741 --> 38:34.324 So she must have walked off without it. 38:35.306 --> 38:36.307 So it's still there probably. 38:36.367 --> 38:37.209 Do we know her name yet? 38:39.993 --> 38:40.333 Fair enough. 38:40.673 --> 38:51.783 Do you think it would be fun to build up a long list of married women that want to sleep with you and you want to sleep with them on the understanding that you would never do it? 38:51.803 --> 38:51.883 Yeah. 38:52.363 --> 38:54.885 But it might be psychologically comforting just to know. 38:55.766 --> 38:57.328 I could use it in arguments with my wife. 38:57.348 --> 38:59.550 You could use it in arguments. 38:59.950 --> 39:10.920 If you had just had a trying day with the family, you could think, oh, alternatively, you know, in reference to that life, alternatively, I could sleep with any one of these people. 39:10.940 --> 39:13.563 That's what it must be like for Gary Barlow or someone like that. 39:13.843 --> 39:15.565 Gary Bala's doing the speaking clock at the moment. 39:15.785 --> 39:15.985 Is he? 39:16.005 --> 39:16.606 Yeah, it's very exciting. 39:16.626 --> 39:17.606 Take it over from Tinkerbell. 39:17.646 --> 39:18.507 It's a comic relief thing. 39:18.527 --> 39:19.608 I just thought I'd drop that in. 39:19.628 --> 39:19.928 Thank you. 39:19.968 --> 39:21.790 But you think that's what it's like for Gary Bala? 39:21.930 --> 39:22.170 Yeah. 39:22.310 --> 39:22.531 Why? 39:22.551 --> 39:24.232 Because he's married but yet lusted after. 39:24.292 --> 39:27.775 And Robbie Williamson, people like that, he must have just sackfuls of males. 39:27.815 --> 39:33.700 Women find married men more attractive than single men because they're less threatening, you know, you don't have to do anything about it. 39:34.120 --> 39:37.884 And also it's more exciting and transgressive if you end up having a dalliance. 39:37.964 --> 39:38.384 That's interesting. 39:38.644 --> 39:47.569 So why not, if you are interested in having a relationship with Adam, but at the same time would be comforted in the knowledge that it would never actually happen, do let us know. 39:47.629 --> 39:51.551 The email is adamandjoe.sixmusicatbbc.co.uk. 39:51.811 --> 39:56.094 You could maybe describe what you would do, how the liaison would work, where you'd go. 39:56.514 --> 40:07.920 You could even become erotic in some of your descriptions, even though remember this is a Saturday morning show, so be circumspect, you know, use analogy and metaphor as much as possible. 40:08.200 --> 40:14.021 Yeah, we'd be happy to receive those texts, and I'm sure they'd help Adam's marriage immensely. 40:15.222 --> 40:18.923 We're going to launch Text the Nation very shortly, listeners, so stay tuned for that. 40:18.963 --> 40:23.564 But right now, here is Ian McNabb with Mersey Beat. 40:23.824 --> 40:26.865 That's Ian McNabb with Mersey Beast. 40:27.105 --> 40:28.585 Not Mersey Beat, okay? 40:28.625 --> 40:29.185 He's changed it. 40:29.205 --> 40:31.126 He's done a little flip on it, Mersey Beast. 40:31.526 --> 40:33.846 It's time now to launch Text the Nation. 40:34.987 --> 40:35.587 Here's the jingle. 40:40.128 --> 40:41.091 What if I don't want to? 40:42.173 --> 40:43.196 But I'm using email. 40:43.356 --> 40:44.058 Is that a problem? 40:47.389 --> 40:49.230 Now, text The Nation this week, listeners. 40:49.270 --> 40:58.915 This is the part of the show, incidentally, if you're a first-time listener, where we talk about a thing, a subject, and then we ask you, our listeners, to text or email your thoughts thereon. 41:00.056 --> 41:00.616 That's it, really. 41:00.636 --> 41:02.717 It doesn't really need more explanation than that. 41:02.778 --> 41:07.720 In the past, we've proffered more explanation, but there's no time anymore for more. 41:09.181 --> 41:09.882 We're running out of time. 41:09.902 --> 41:11.944 There's only an hour and 40 minutes left. 41:11.984 --> 41:12.664 Yeah, exactly. 41:12.704 --> 41:15.447 So we've got to keep the whole thing moving. 41:16.028 --> 41:23.294 Now, this week we are talking about sources of domestic irritation, domestic disturbances, let's call them, okay? 41:23.334 --> 41:33.904 And these are things that tend to annoy you about cohabiting, whether you're cohabiting with a married wife person that you are married to or a husband. 41:34.745 --> 41:42.830 a husband, or like other people, if you're students and you're living together, any kind of domestic disturbances that arise from cohabiting, irritations. 41:43.190 --> 41:44.391 Here are some examples for you. 41:45.312 --> 41:47.633 I've got a big problem with dishwashers, right? 41:48.374 --> 41:48.634 Right. 41:48.654 --> 41:49.875 I can see Joe's heart sinking. 41:49.895 --> 41:51.215 You don't like talking about this problem. 41:51.235 --> 41:52.256 No, no, I'm excited. 41:54.037 --> 41:57.120 I've got a big dishwasher battle going on in our house, right? 41:57.240 --> 41:58.441 I don't like to use the dishwasher. 41:58.501 --> 42:12.912 I would rather clean up by hand and do a good job and polish those glasses and make sure they go back into the cupboard, sparkling in case we have guests so that I can just get them out and impress the guests with the cleanliness of the glass. 42:12.932 --> 42:13.512 What's the problem? 42:13.852 --> 42:16.975 The problem is that other people in the house 42:17.835 --> 42:24.040 think that it's a better idea to load them all into the dishwasher so they come out streaked with a kind of brown crust. 42:24.560 --> 42:26.702 So your problem is that your wife uses the dishwasher? 42:26.762 --> 42:27.102 Yes! 42:28.323 --> 42:29.865 And you like to wash up by hand? 42:29.905 --> 42:30.305 Connect! 42:31.466 --> 42:35.909 And she refuses... Is this a bad idea for Texas Nation? 42:36.369 --> 42:46.077 She refuses to do it the way I want to because all that happens is the glasses come out covered in the crust 42:46.317 --> 42:49.721 And then I have to rewash them and polish them and put them back in the cupboard. 42:50.021 --> 42:51.863 How is that a labour saving device? 42:51.923 --> 42:52.824 I'm asking you. 42:53.525 --> 42:55.948 How is it a labour saving device if you have to wash them? 42:56.288 --> 42:57.910 Not once, but twice in the second time. 42:57.950 --> 42:59.953 That sounds like you should just get a better dishwasher. 43:00.073 --> 43:00.974 Maybe that's the answer. 43:01.454 --> 43:03.095 But it's not one that quits them properly. 43:03.115 --> 43:04.796 Or just wash them by hand. 43:05.417 --> 43:06.257 Domestic disturbance. 43:06.277 --> 43:07.678 So hang on, how does that flare up? 43:07.958 --> 43:09.679 Has that flared up into an argument? 43:09.699 --> 43:10.720 Many, many times. 43:10.800 --> 43:11.180 Really? 43:11.240 --> 43:11.440 Yeah. 43:11.880 --> 43:20.065 And I keep trying to think of the way to say it without sounding like chippy or passive-aggressive, but it's got to a stage right now where it's clearly an issue. 43:20.386 --> 43:21.746 So I say, hey, um... 43:22.987 --> 43:27.431 I think, maybe with the glasses, let's not put them in the dishwasher, let's just do them by hand. 43:27.671 --> 43:28.712 Or if you want, I'll do them. 43:28.772 --> 43:29.572 I don't mind doing them. 43:30.053 --> 43:32.295 I would call this pathetic domestic arguments. 43:33.516 --> 43:33.776 Fair enough. 43:33.796 --> 43:35.457 I think the addition of the word pathetic. 43:35.877 --> 43:39.200 But like, the more pathetic, but yet the greater they flare up. 43:39.720 --> 43:43.463 I would have thought you would have been on the side of right, because you're going to the greater effort. 43:43.523 --> 43:47.186 You're actually physically hand washing the dishes, right? 43:48.707 --> 43:50.248 How can your wife complain about that? 43:50.528 --> 43:52.489 How can she complain about you taking extra care? 43:52.609 --> 44:05.013 Unless you dilly-dally and leave it all in great piles on the side, bide your time until you're going to wash them, and they're a hideous eyesore that your wife just wants to clear away by putting them in the dishwasher. 44:05.033 --> 44:06.194 Is that what happens? 44:07.014 --> 44:07.494 Yes, it is. 44:07.514 --> 44:08.595 Maybe sometimes. 44:08.735 --> 44:12.136 And you actually don't really get round to doing the hand washing very often. 44:12.996 --> 44:14.377 I don't want to get into it with you as well. 44:15.097 --> 44:15.718 Here's another one. 44:17.379 --> 44:18.180 We've got a toaster. 44:18.200 --> 44:19.941 This is not anyone's... You've got a toaster? 44:20.001 --> 44:20.222 Yeah. 44:20.342 --> 44:20.702 Wow. 44:20.862 --> 44:24.866 It's one of the toasters where you've got a handle to lower the bread into the toaster, right? 44:24.906 --> 44:25.146 Right. 44:25.246 --> 44:27.528 And then you set a dial for how long you want it to be. 44:27.568 --> 44:28.569 Like one of a cafe. 44:28.609 --> 44:30.651 You make toasted sandwiches in it, can you? 44:30.931 --> 44:31.531 Yeah. 44:31.572 --> 44:31.872 Could do. 44:32.092 --> 44:32.532 Well... No. 44:32.672 --> 44:33.793 No, I'm thinking of a different sort. 44:33.813 --> 44:34.614 You're thinking of a different sort. 44:34.634 --> 44:35.435 You know what I mean, don't you, Ollie? 44:37.910 --> 44:38.631 Yeah, Ollie knows that. 44:38.651 --> 44:39.292 That's it, yes. 44:40.113 --> 44:42.756 So, we should explain, incidentally, that Ollie is a guest. 44:42.776 --> 44:43.257 Don't explain. 44:43.637 --> 44:45.039 Don't explain about Ollie. 44:45.600 --> 44:46.140 He can't speak. 44:47.262 --> 44:52.648 Anyway, we've got one of these toasters where you lower the bread in, you set the timer for how long you want it to toast for, right? 44:53.209 --> 44:54.070 So I often... 44:55.151 --> 44:59.893 get my bread ready and lower it in there and start toasting and thinking, I'll give it about three on the dial there. 45:00.253 --> 45:01.134 It's exciting, isn't it? 45:01.434 --> 45:03.455 And then I'm all excited about my toast. 45:03.495 --> 45:08.297 I'm going to put some jam on there and the dial stops and I raise the bread up. 45:08.697 --> 45:16.320 It's completely cold still because the toaster was not plugged in, but I thought it was working because the timer is clicking away there. 45:16.760 --> 45:23.083 And someone in the house has unplugged the toaster and put the kettle in and I don't 45:23.223 --> 45:24.505 Care about the kettle! 45:24.806 --> 45:25.947 I don't have tea! 45:26.428 --> 45:27.991 I want toast, not tea! 45:28.011 --> 45:29.814 Okay, do you want another one? 45:32.190 --> 45:33.390 So hang on, what's that one? 45:33.811 --> 45:36.932 They keep unplugging the toaster and I'm not aware of it. 45:36.952 --> 45:41.973 When you say they, the only people in your house, are your wife and children under six. 45:42.553 --> 45:42.834 Yeah. 45:42.854 --> 45:43.174 Seven. 45:43.254 --> 45:45.094 To narrow it down, it's my wife. 45:45.774 --> 45:46.695 It's your wife. 45:47.035 --> 45:51.576 It's funny how everything on this show these days comes back to you all. 45:53.097 --> 45:54.137 Well, what do you expect? 45:54.157 --> 45:56.338 We should have her in one week. 45:56.358 --> 45:57.158 I live with her. 45:57.398 --> 45:58.759 She's the only person I see. 45:59.739 --> 46:00.699 She has to put up with me. 46:00.899 --> 46:06.041 I'd be interested to see whether there was a sort of change in your general manner and approach to subjects. 46:06.061 --> 46:07.321 There would be, yeah, there would be. 46:07.401 --> 46:08.141 If she was here. 46:08.481 --> 46:11.442 It would be as if my parents were here, I would suddenly shut down. 46:11.782 --> 46:12.702 There would be a tonal shift. 46:12.722 --> 46:14.022 I'm very deferential, yes. 46:14.422 --> 46:17.383 Okay, so your wife insists on plugging in the kettle. 46:17.443 --> 46:18.543 You don't drink tea, do you? 46:18.603 --> 46:18.843 No. 46:18.864 --> 46:20.244 No, neither do I. Neither of us drink tea. 46:20.284 --> 46:20.904 Don't like hot drinks. 46:20.924 --> 46:21.844 She's a keen drinker. 46:22.044 --> 46:22.484 Loves tea. 46:22.584 --> 46:23.605 I don't like hot drinks either. 46:23.665 --> 46:24.765 That's one thing we have in common. 46:24.885 --> 46:25.005 Yeah. 46:25.926 --> 46:29.028 So she would be putting the, that's understandable, she'd be putting the kettle in the whole time. 46:29.408 --> 46:32.371 Have you heard of sort of double plugs? 46:32.991 --> 46:33.331 Yeah. 46:33.712 --> 46:35.573 You know, you get two in one. 46:36.194 --> 46:38.015 The double plug is, I know you're right. 46:38.035 --> 46:40.677 Then you could have them both plugged in, but it's double sockets. 46:40.737 --> 46:42.419 I always, I keep forgetting to buy them. 46:42.459 --> 46:44.400 We've got loads in the house, but they're all occupied. 46:45.541 --> 46:46.781 Anyway, here's another one. 46:46.941 --> 46:48.462 Here's another domestic irritation, right? 46:48.482 --> 46:50.662 This happens a pathetic domestic irritation. 46:51.263 --> 46:53.443 A lot of these occur in the bathroom, right? 46:53.463 --> 46:55.484 That's a common place for flare-ups. 46:55.544 --> 46:57.104 Yeah, for dishwashing and toasting. 46:57.404 --> 46:58.144 No, but you know what I mean. 46:58.164 --> 46:58.264 Right. 46:58.284 --> 47:03.946 There's a lot of problem areas in the bathroom, the most obvious being raising or not raising the seat on the lavvy. 47:03.966 --> 47:09.307 That causes a lot of problems with married couples and any cohabitors of different sexes. 47:09.467 --> 47:12.168 But my big problem is with the electric toothbrush. 47:13.529 --> 47:21.976 I insist on the toothbrush being correctly rinsed after use and replaced... Well now hang on, you have one between the two of you and then a head each. 47:22.357 --> 47:24.919 No, we're married, we... You use the same brush. 47:24.939 --> 47:25.359 Yeah, yeah. 47:25.419 --> 47:27.421 You brush your both mouths with the same brush. 47:27.441 --> 47:27.621 Yeah. 47:28.642 --> 47:31.143 Now, is that common? 47:31.243 --> 47:32.023 Listeners, I don't know. 47:32.063 --> 47:35.625 I mean, I'm on my own here, but to me that sounds... We've got three children. 47:35.645 --> 47:37.866 We've shared fluids on many occasions. 47:37.926 --> 47:40.587 It's not a big problem for us to brush our teeth. 47:40.767 --> 47:41.067 I don't know. 47:41.107 --> 47:45.069 Listen, I'd be interested to know listeners, but Ollie, does that sound normal to you? 47:46.349 --> 47:46.810 Ollie does! 47:46.850 --> 47:47.010 He's 21! 47:47.070 --> 47:48.071 What does he know about? 47:48.091 --> 47:49.873 Yeah, but look at his teeth, man. 47:50.393 --> 47:51.314 And he cohabits. 47:51.754 --> 47:53.296 I think I've never heard of that before. 47:53.356 --> 47:53.736 Really? 47:53.836 --> 47:54.097 Yeah. 47:54.197 --> 47:56.419 Do you reckon most married couples would have two electric toothbrushes? 47:56.439 --> 47:56.719 Yes. 47:57.120 --> 47:57.560 I didn't. 47:57.600 --> 48:00.503 Because you're married doesn't mean that you're symbiotic. 48:01.244 --> 48:02.064 Biologically. 48:02.785 --> 48:05.466 Well, no, what if you had a cold and she didn't want to get it? 48:05.966 --> 48:09.507 Or you had any kind of disease that was contained in your body? 48:09.627 --> 48:10.547 We all get everything. 48:10.707 --> 48:11.187 That's what it's like. 48:11.207 --> 48:12.027 Well, clearly. 48:12.648 --> 48:13.908 Well, you may have found the reason. 48:14.168 --> 48:14.588 Right. 48:14.828 --> 48:15.708 Anyway, keep going. 48:15.748 --> 48:16.549 Anyway, share the toothbrush. 48:16.569 --> 48:17.489 We share the toothbrush. 48:17.909 --> 48:20.270 She fails to rinse the toothbrush properly. 48:20.290 --> 48:20.590 Right. 48:20.630 --> 48:28.732 And large deposits of toothpaste start building up around... For one, she overloads the brush grotesquely, right? 48:29.552 --> 48:33.036 That's true, you only need a pea-sized bit of toothpaste, it can be very bad for you actually. 48:33.056 --> 48:33.516 That's right. 48:33.896 --> 48:34.997 She overloads it. 48:35.298 --> 48:40.362 So not only is there oozing, crusty deposits of toothpaste on the brush. 48:40.743 --> 48:44.366 We've only just got over your ball roller or whatever it was the other week. 48:44.767 --> 48:45.888 The deodorant. 48:46.348 --> 48:50.953 But also, there's drips that come down onto the sink, right? 48:51.213 --> 48:52.494 And they harden on the side of the sink. 48:52.514 --> 48:53.415 What are we talking about now? 48:53.655 --> 49:05.615 toothpaste okay and there's blobs of toothpaste that go onto the side of the sink that drip down once she's overloaded the brush right and they get all hardened I have to knock them off there and scrape them off it's a living nightmare 49:07.950 --> 49:14.533 I don't, the thing about this textination is, it just feels like you airing marital problems. 49:14.914 --> 49:18.696 Well let's see, well I might be wrong, maybe no one will take part in textination this week. 49:18.716 --> 49:24.839 Maybe textination should be just, what is eroding your relationship if you're married? 49:25.659 --> 49:26.460 No, come on. 49:26.600 --> 49:30.402 I believe that other people have these kind of domestic irritations if they're cohabiting, right? 49:30.883 --> 49:31.563 Let's find out. 49:31.643 --> 49:33.925 If absolutely no one texts in, then we can... No, I'm sure they will. 49:33.985 --> 49:34.585 I'm sure they will. 49:34.605 --> 49:35.706 Then we can narrow it down. 49:35.846 --> 49:37.747 The text number is, listeners. 49:38.768 --> 49:40.349 Ooh, it's 64046. 49:41.489 --> 49:42.570 That's 64046. 49:43.070 --> 49:46.933 The email is adamandjo.6music at bbc.co.uk. 49:47.293 --> 49:51.336 And that's an ampersand, not the word and, between the Adam and the Jo. 49:51.796 --> 49:54.660 Okay, now just before the news, we have a short free play for you. 49:54.700 --> 50:02.449 This is from the band of Montreal, and it's from their new album, Skeletal Lamping, which is a kind of a long concept album. 50:02.489 --> 50:06.113 All the tracks merge into one another, so it has a very abrupt ending. 50:06.133 --> 50:08.796 Uh, so don't be upset when that happens, listeners. 50:08.856 --> 50:11.259 This is called, And I've Been a Bloody Shadow. 50:11.499 --> 50:11.799 stop. 50:12.280 --> 50:13.581 You see, that's quite a weird one, isn't it? 50:13.681 --> 50:15.463 But I really enjoy that album. 50:15.603 --> 50:18.506 That's of Montreal from their album, Skeletal Lamping. 50:18.546 --> 50:20.648 This is Adam and Jo here on BBC 6 Music. 50:20.708 --> 50:22.530 It's just gone 10.30 time for the news. 50:22.730 --> 50:23.771 That's very good, isn't it? 50:23.831 --> 50:25.193 Well done, Susie and the Banshees from 1981. 50:25.613 --> 50:26.954 That was Spellbound. 50:27.035 --> 50:31.219 This is Adam and Jo here at the Big British Castle on 6 Music. 50:31.539 --> 50:38.442 Yeah, now we've been away for the last couple of weeks and it's my fault because I had to go to America to work. 50:38.922 --> 50:40.283 It was a terrible chore. 50:40.603 --> 50:41.503 It wasn't, it was brilliant. 50:41.963 --> 50:48.126 While I was out there, I watched some telly and one of my favorite programs was on on American television, Monster Quest. 50:48.566 --> 50:48.846 Wow. 50:48.926 --> 50:50.147 Have you heard of Monster Quest? 50:50.407 --> 50:50.667 No. 50:51.427 --> 50:54.509 Here is a little audio description of Monster Quest. 50:56.770 --> 50:58.670 Witnesses around the world reporting monsters. 51:02.185 --> 51:04.787 Are they real or imaginary? 51:04.867 --> 51:06.167 Science searches for answers. 51:07.848 --> 51:08.969 Yeah, monster quest. 51:09.329 --> 51:09.989 Monster quest. 51:10.730 --> 51:11.810 That's not a monster. 51:11.910 --> 51:13.411 One of the sounds in there was just a plane. 51:13.431 --> 51:14.292 That's not so much a monster. 51:14.312 --> 51:16.773 There was a plane that was the scientist searching for the monsters. 51:16.853 --> 51:19.495 There was the sound of a gun, a gun clicking. 51:20.115 --> 51:20.315 Right. 51:21.456 --> 51:22.336 A gun being cocked. 51:22.676 --> 51:24.817 I thought maybe there was someone saying, I seen a monster! 51:25.098 --> 51:27.279 It's like a big flying bird, a metal one! 51:27.719 --> 51:28.540 No, it's just a plane. 51:28.640 --> 51:29.221 Yeah. 51:29.281 --> 51:29.501 Yeah. 51:29.561 --> 51:33.865 And then there was also the sound of a lot of fluid being released towards the end of that. 51:33.925 --> 51:36.748 You know, that's someone who's seen a terrifying monster. 51:37.148 --> 51:43.875 Monster Quest is a serious documentary series on the History Channel about mythical beasts, cryptozoological. 51:43.935 --> 51:44.175 Yeah. 51:44.535 --> 51:47.959 and scientists searching to try and find out the truth. 51:48.139 --> 51:57.047 And we know from previous song wars and having chatted to you, Joe Cornish, that you love the cryptozoology and in particular you are in love with Bigfoot. 51:57.188 --> 51:59.170 I am passionately in love with Bigfoot. 51:59.930 --> 52:04.233 Yeah, so I was very excited to see this new series of Monster Quest, and I was a fan of Series 1. 52:04.833 --> 52:17.942 My favourite show on Series 1 was an episode called Sasquatch Attack, in which a team of scientists went to an isolated cabin next to a lake in Canada, a cabin that had been vandalised. 52:19.534 --> 52:20.995 I don't know why you're laughing. 52:21.015 --> 52:23.355 A cabin that had been vandalized by a Bigfoot. 52:23.435 --> 52:25.696 The fridge had been ripped out, etc, etc. 52:26.957 --> 52:36.200 And so in series two of Monster Quest, they decided to go back to this cabin with even more scientists and more equipment and once and for all prove. 52:38.462 --> 52:40.544 The existence of Bigfoot. 52:40.744 --> 52:42.566 You're laughing because of the fear, right? 52:42.907 --> 52:43.447 I think so. 52:43.467 --> 52:44.729 Because you're just gibbering with fear. 52:45.129 --> 52:46.311 So this is the second clip. 52:46.331 --> 52:55.641 This is a synopsis of basically what happened in this episode of Monster Quest Series 2, and this particular episode was called Sasquatch Attack 2. 52:56.021 --> 52:57.063 Okay, here's the synopsis. 52:59.082 --> 53:04.150 At a remote fishing camp, something has unleashed its wrath. 53:04.891 --> 53:10.419 When Monster Quest first investigated, a legendary creature may have turned up its aggression. 53:14.443 --> 53:23.030 Now, Monster Quest returns with a new search, a new plan, and a new opportunity to analyze some of the most startling evidence collected. 53:23.790 --> 53:30.935 So the first time a mysterious invisible creature laid siege to the fishing hut, whatever it was, it pelted stones at the hut. 53:31.616 --> 53:40.443 So the owner put down, the scientist put down a big board with screws in it to try and get this creature to step on it and leave some kind of a residue or a sample. 53:40.943 --> 53:41.764 It did, huh? 53:42.384 --> 53:49.212 And they took that piece of tissue, you know, Bigfoot tissue, by all accounts, to a lab and had it analysed. 53:49.232 --> 53:51.815 They also found a hair and had it analysed. 53:51.855 --> 54:00.766 So in this second programme, not only are they returning to this hut to see if they can capture this creature on film, but they're also going to announce the results 54:01.286 --> 54:04.368 of the DNA allysis of the tissue and the hair. 54:04.388 --> 54:10.731 They've had a whole year to get top scientists to analyze this extraordinary Sasquatch evidence. 54:10.791 --> 54:11.972 It's pretty exciting, isn't it? 54:12.132 --> 54:12.972 It is exciting. 54:13.153 --> 54:15.034 And let's not forget what this is all about. 54:15.194 --> 54:19.536 Let's just remind ourselves of the monster that they're questing to prove. 54:20.356 --> 54:21.617 Is this sentence working? 54:21.857 --> 54:23.098 To prove its existence of? 54:23.118 --> 54:25.299 Questing to prove its existence of. 54:25.659 --> 54:26.560 This is the monster. 54:27.000 --> 54:31.064 The creature, described by some to be hair-covered, six to ten feet tall. 54:31.524 --> 54:37.850 It has 17-inch feet, long arms, and is capable of shaking a fishing cabin to its foundation. 54:38.410 --> 54:41.253 It fits the historical description of a Sasporch. 54:43.174 --> 54:44.455 It could be Ollie, it could be you! 54:44.475 --> 54:45.356 It could be me. 54:45.416 --> 54:46.437 It could be either of you. 54:47.017 --> 54:47.938 So how exciting. 54:48.238 --> 54:48.538 Yeah. 54:48.719 --> 54:54.683 You know, I was settling down for an amazing evening's television, the follow-up to one of my favourite documentaries. 54:54.743 --> 55:03.570 And they don't address the possibility that it could be, say, teenagers or... No, because this fishing village is, this fishing hut is very isolated. 55:03.990 --> 55:07.312 They repeat over and over again that it's only accessible by flying plane. 55:07.513 --> 55:08.854 Okay. 55:09.194 --> 55:10.855 So no, that's completely out of the quest. 55:10.875 --> 55:11.876 It could be Alex James. 55:12.376 --> 55:31.611 that's yeah well they yeah they don't consider that actually so first of all they bring a huge amount of equipment and they have some special techniques to try and lure the Sasquatch out of the forest so let's have a little hear the description of what equipment they bring 55:33.007 --> 55:35.490 The team plans to use a three-pronged approach. 55:35.770 --> 55:43.660 Infrared cameras mounted on the cabin, camera traps hidden around the perimeter of the forest, and audio and video recorders that will be running continuously. 55:43.880 --> 55:47.444 The team will deploy another attractant in an effort to lure the creature in. 55:47.724 --> 55:50.528 Gorilla urine collected during the menstrual cycle. 55:51.378 --> 55:55.181 Oh, well, I know I always find that very attractive. 55:55.201 --> 56:04.027 So, you know, they've got night vision cameras all around the camp, they've got them strapped to trees, they're activated by movement, and they've got menstrual gorilla urine. 56:04.167 --> 56:04.427 Yeah. 56:04.587 --> 56:05.147 As a bait. 56:05.388 --> 56:05.868 Delicious. 56:06.188 --> 56:07.029 How can that fail? 56:07.229 --> 56:08.269 Yeah, you would think. 56:08.530 --> 56:13.773 So they also construct a hide, they monitor everything very carefully for seven nights. 56:15.154 --> 56:17.716 Desperate to catch any evidence of the creature. 56:18.536 --> 56:19.377 And what do you think happened? 56:20.257 --> 56:20.998 I would say nothing. 56:21.658 --> 56:22.679 Well let's hear what happened. 56:33.141 --> 56:33.962 No, nothing happened. 56:33.982 --> 56:34.422 Yeah, nothing. 56:34.522 --> 56:35.964 Okay, but forget about that. 56:36.084 --> 56:37.405 What happened to the analysis of that? 56:37.445 --> 56:38.246 Well, exactly. 56:38.546 --> 56:42.149 Forget about the fact that seven nights went by and nothing happened. 56:42.630 --> 56:46.293 There's the analysis of the tissue on the nail board. 56:46.353 --> 56:46.933 And the hair? 56:47.153 --> 56:49.435 Yeah, let's be reminded about the tissue first. 56:50.196 --> 56:53.719 The owner of the cabin had laid out a bed of screws, and it worked. 56:54.400 --> 56:58.604 A 17-inch bloody footprint was left behind, along with tissue. 56:59.284 --> 56:59.604 Yeah? 57:00.064 --> 57:00.925 With a bloody tissue. 57:01.425 --> 57:02.386 Not no, tissue. 57:02.586 --> 57:03.046 Right, right. 57:03.426 --> 57:08.869 Okay, so they get top scientists to analyse the tissue and guess what the results are? 57:08.889 --> 57:10.250 A member of the cast of skins. 57:10.950 --> 57:11.570 No, let's hear. 57:11.951 --> 57:20.435 The DNA that came from the material belongs to fungi, so we did not find any animal DNA. 57:22.816 --> 57:24.697 What, he's like a swamp creature? 57:25.277 --> 57:26.078 It's just fungus. 57:26.758 --> 57:30.480 Unfortunately, it was just fungus, so it's not actually animal DNA. 57:30.980 --> 57:33.442 But don't worry, because there's the hair, right? 57:33.562 --> 57:34.202 Yeah, yeah, yeah. 57:34.222 --> 57:35.123 The Sasquatch hair. 57:35.963 --> 57:37.344 Let's just get reminded about that. 57:37.364 --> 57:42.066 The hair on the rod case from 2007 may still hold the answer. 57:42.367 --> 57:45.248 Could this hair belong to the creature that terrorized the cabin? 57:45.268 --> 57:45.308 So... 57:48.636 --> 57:51.177 Bear in mind I've been watching this show for 40 minutes. 57:52.398 --> 57:55.839 So I'm clinging on to the hair, you know, no results with the hide. 57:56.379 --> 57:58.960 Nothing with the tissue that's turned out to be fungi. 58:00.081 --> 58:00.901 What about the hair? 58:01.622 --> 58:02.762 My only hope is the hair. 58:03.102 --> 58:05.483 Can you guess what the results of the hair analysis were? 58:07.784 --> 58:09.785 It was a dog or a wolf creature. 58:10.585 --> 58:11.726 Wolf creature would have been good. 58:12.246 --> 58:14.407 This is the results of the hair analysis. 58:14.807 --> 58:20.349 This hair has been artificially bleached, and it is a human head hair, most likely of a Caucasian. 58:21.049 --> 58:22.970 No, so it is a member of the cast of Skins. 58:23.270 --> 58:23.490 Yes. 58:25.171 --> 58:30.092 So after 45 minutes of Sasquatch documentary, this is a synopsis of the results. 58:30.572 --> 58:32.633 Morning comes without incident. 58:32.673 --> 58:34.834 We did not find any animal DNA. 58:35.034 --> 58:36.634 And it is a human head hair. 58:36.774 --> 58:39.355 The past seven days have not yielded much. 58:41.816 --> 58:44.498 But TV is just full of these kinds of documentaries. 58:44.518 --> 58:45.939 It was the History Channel. 58:46.099 --> 58:46.500 Right. 58:46.760 --> 58:48.181 They made such a big fuss. 58:48.221 --> 58:49.882 They really made me think they had evidence. 58:49.902 --> 58:52.064 What on earth did you think was gonna happen? 58:53.223 --> 58:59.645 Do you think it was going to be, would you, you would have read about it in the papers if it was the program that finally revealed the existence of Sasquatch? 58:59.925 --> 59:12.869 You know, our friend Louis Theroux, a telejournalist, asked me, we were talking about this a few months ago, and he asked me, he said, Joe, what percentage of a chance do you think there is that Bigfoot actually exists, realistically? 59:13.329 --> 59:15.310 And I said, five, six percent. 59:16.070 --> 59:42.493 and he looked at me just like he would look at an idiot in one of his documentaries with a really withering look and there was a short bit of silence and then he changed the subject it's nice that you still believe though man it's one of the things i like about you i was so excited about that documentary i'm really sorry wasted my time i'm so sorry here's some music this is the kings of leon text the nation text text text text the nation what if i don't want to text the nation it doesn't matter text 59:45.216 --> 59:49.058 Yes, it's Text the Nation time here on The Adam and Jo Show on BBC6 Music. 59:49.438 --> 59:51.359 Adam, can you describe the subject this week? 59:51.939 --> 59:56.081 Well, we decided it was pathetic, domestic gripes. 59:56.342 --> 01:00:01.604 Yeah, things that cause big flare-ups between you and your cohabitees that are actually pretty petty. 01:00:02.685 --> 01:00:05.786 And here are some texts that we have had in. 01:00:06.006 --> 01:00:08.708 Just before you read those out, I'll give you one more from my locker. 01:00:10.968 --> 01:00:22.832 I get very upset about the fact that when I come down for breakfast sometimes, the children have already been down and had their breakfast and they've left the milk out of the fridge and it's no longer chilly like I like it. 01:00:23.612 --> 01:00:29.794 And sometimes I get so upset about the fact that the milk is warm, which does not suit me for my cereal needs, 01:00:30.354 --> 01:00:39.958 that I get a cocktail shaker out and put ice in it and I shake the milk over the ice and then strain it through the cocktail shaker onto my corn flakes. 01:00:40.259 --> 01:00:40.599 Wow. 01:00:40.719 --> 01:00:44.521 Because then you get chilled milk, which is the way I want it! 01:00:45.081 --> 01:00:48.622 Not left out to get warm on the table! 01:00:49.243 --> 01:00:49.843 Terrifying. 01:00:50.143 --> 01:00:51.444 Is that too much to ask? 01:00:51.764 --> 01:00:54.025 No, certainly not. 01:00:54.305 --> 01:00:55.986 Here are some texts that have come in from listeners. 01:00:56.066 --> 01:01:04.671 Stu in Hull says, I nearly had a kung fu fight with my housemate as he keeps turning the heating up to 30 because he's got a phobia of damp laundry. 01:01:04.711 --> 01:01:05.812 That's a very good one. 01:01:05.892 --> 01:01:10.915 I have a lot of grapples over the thermostat in my house. 01:01:11.275 --> 01:01:13.597 People keep going up to maybe 25. 01:01:13.657 --> 01:01:16.478 You like things cool, I know that, from our childhood. 01:01:16.558 --> 01:01:16.959 Yeah, I like it. 01:01:16.979 --> 01:01:18.599 You like windows open and chilliness. 01:01:18.620 --> 01:01:19.040 Yes, please. 01:01:19.900 --> 01:01:20.521 Like your milk. 01:01:20.941 --> 01:01:21.981 Other people like warmth. 01:01:22.782 --> 01:01:24.162 What kind of people are these? 01:01:24.943 --> 01:01:26.524 Who wins in that argument? 01:01:26.864 --> 01:01:27.144 Battle. 01:01:27.364 --> 01:01:29.345 Well, me because I sneak down and turn the thermostat down. 01:01:29.465 --> 01:01:29.765 Really? 01:01:29.825 --> 01:01:30.046 Yeah. 01:01:31.106 --> 01:01:32.187 Here's one from Memme. 01:01:32.507 --> 01:01:39.611 The people I live with refuse to buy new vacuum bags, as no one wants to feel short-changed by buying some. 01:01:40.011 --> 01:01:46.074 So instead, we're reusing the same tired old bag by sort of poking dirt out of it. 01:01:46.174 --> 01:01:47.295 That is grotesque. 01:01:48.115 --> 01:01:49.156 I really sympathise. 01:01:49.736 --> 01:01:52.358 That's a horrible one, and it's probably very unsanitary. 01:01:52.678 --> 01:02:02.044 We did have an email from a doctor, a teeth doctor, I believe they're called dentists, and he pointed out that sharing a toothbrush is really a very bad thing to do, even if you were married. 01:02:02.425 --> 01:02:02.945 Yeah, you did. 01:02:03.005 --> 01:02:04.426 I'll get to it and then I'll come back to it, yeah. 01:02:04.466 --> 01:02:07.108 That's kind of a revelation after 10 years of marriage for me. 01:02:07.848 --> 01:02:10.429 So I've got to go out and invest in a new toothbrush now. 01:02:10.750 --> 01:02:11.570 Here are some more. 01:02:11.630 --> 01:02:18.153 Joe and Adam, my girlfriend has no regard for matching socks and is quite comfortable in wearing odd socks that aren't even the same colour. 01:02:18.654 --> 01:02:26.438 This has irritated me to the point of despair and has resulted in me hiding her socks from her and issuing her with a matching pair each morning. 01:02:26.478 --> 01:02:35.002 I like the use of the word issuing, as if you're in some kind of awful camp or hospital and she's being given her pills. 01:02:35.903 --> 01:02:37.424 That's from Pete in Colchester. 01:02:37.604 --> 01:02:38.745 Totally sympathised, Pete. 01:02:39.006 --> 01:02:39.326 Really? 01:02:39.386 --> 01:02:42.449 That would make me very... You know, I'm less... She's trying to be quirky. 01:02:42.469 --> 01:02:44.951 No, I'm less fascistic about items of clothing. 01:02:44.971 --> 01:02:46.333 I think that's a personal decision. 01:02:46.633 --> 01:02:49.616 But I can relate to how those things flare up and become an issue. 01:02:50.096 --> 01:02:50.557 You know what I mean? 01:02:51.037 --> 01:03:00.286 The problem I have is when socks get stolen from my drawer and misused, I have some socks that I really look forward to wearing. 01:03:00.806 --> 01:03:02.729 The thick brown pair, they're so comfy. 01:03:03.189 --> 01:03:06.092 And when they turn up in somebody else's drawer... 01:03:07.088 --> 01:03:12.733 That is a cause of concern for me that, you know, threatens to flare up into an argument. 01:03:12.793 --> 01:03:13.694 Here's one from Una. 01:03:14.234 --> 01:03:23.202 I do all the clothes washing, drying and sorting, but I'm not allowed to put away my boyfriend's clothes because, in his words, quote, I don't fold them right. 01:03:23.862 --> 01:03:24.403 Close quotes. 01:03:24.483 --> 01:03:25.584 In particular, the socks. 01:03:26.344 --> 01:03:31.469 So I set his things to one side on top of the drawers where they pile up and get mixed up with his dirty clothes. 01:03:31.749 --> 01:03:33.690 He then complains he can't find anything to wear. 01:03:35.393 --> 01:03:36.454 Anything to say about that one? 01:03:36.694 --> 01:03:37.575 Yeah, totally relate to that. 01:03:37.595 --> 01:03:38.476 Whose side are you on there? 01:03:38.636 --> 01:03:39.697 Una or the boyfriend? 01:03:39.798 --> 01:03:40.658 Well, it's difficult. 01:03:40.759 --> 01:03:41.379 It's difficult. 01:03:41.439 --> 01:03:45.463 I think Una's nice to be doing all the washing and stuff because that's a massive chore. 01:03:45.563 --> 01:03:46.745 Who gets to do the washing in your house? 01:03:46.765 --> 01:03:47.906 Do you just do your own washing? 01:03:48.346 --> 01:03:51.329 Erm... No, my girlfriend. 01:03:51.450 --> 01:03:55.334 Yeah, I mean, you really have to appreciate someone that's going to take on that task. 01:03:55.394 --> 01:03:56.054 It's true, it's true. 01:03:56.415 --> 01:03:57.576 Olly, anything to contribute? 01:04:01.684 --> 01:04:02.304 No, fair enough. 01:04:02.464 --> 01:04:04.626 We should explain to people who Ollie is though, shouldn't we? 01:04:04.646 --> 01:04:05.447 No, I don't think so. 01:04:05.567 --> 01:04:06.788 It's fine, it's a mystery. 01:04:07.408 --> 01:04:13.253 No, I appreciate that, but the thing is that that's one of the areas that my wife has really enriched my life in, one of the many areas I should say. 01:04:13.273 --> 01:04:13.713 Clean clothes. 01:04:14.134 --> 01:04:19.278 And not only clean clothes and a regular change of clothes, but she has shown me how to fold shirts. 01:04:19.778 --> 01:04:22.038 It's one of the things that I write most about her. 01:04:22.058 --> 01:04:22.459 It's lovely. 01:04:22.759 --> 01:04:24.439 Here's another one from Jason. 01:04:24.859 --> 01:04:31.200 My wife Lorna, Jason's naming names, always insists on using my razors to do her legs. 01:04:31.460 --> 01:04:32.421 That's a common one, isn't it? 01:04:32.441 --> 01:04:37.462 Then she puts it back, then, unbeknown to me, I have a shave with a ruddy blunt blade. 01:04:37.882 --> 01:04:38.382 Argh! 01:04:38.682 --> 01:04:41.643 It's, I mean, that's almost a cliché of domestic problems. 01:04:41.663 --> 01:04:45.163 You see that in lots of sitcoms and stuff like that, but it's true. 01:04:45.223 --> 01:04:46.224 It's one of the massive ones. 01:04:46.264 --> 01:04:47.604 It's like leaving the toilet seat up. 01:04:48.724 --> 01:04:49.424 And it's deadly. 01:04:50.125 --> 01:04:50.625 Deadly. 01:04:51.605 --> 01:04:57.388 You know, you can rip your whole face off like that just for the sake of a woman's smooth legs. 01:04:57.508 --> 01:05:06.132 Listen, I think what we should do is have a record and I'm going to sort through, because we have been inundated in these domestic problems with the domestic problems. 01:05:06.352 --> 01:05:08.733 And I'm going to have to sort through them to find some really good ones. 01:05:09.153 --> 01:05:10.194 Not that those weren't good. 01:05:10.594 --> 01:05:16.957 And we should say the lady who emailed us in earlier, her boyfriend was called Jason, her fiancé. 01:05:17.077 --> 01:05:17.317 Oh yes. 01:05:17.957 --> 01:05:19.918 In fact, no, she was the person who saw you on the train, right? 01:05:19.938 --> 01:05:23.500 This is the lady who wrote a little note to me on the train while I was sleeping. 01:05:23.620 --> 01:05:26.902 She would like to make it clear that she is very, very much in love with you, Jason. 01:05:27.302 --> 01:05:31.585 And in no way is she interested in any sort of relationship with Adam. 01:05:32.145 --> 01:05:34.787 And it's just an idle, pathetic, frippery. 01:05:35.367 --> 01:05:38.869 And she loves you and is really... How insecure is Jason, though? 01:05:39.869 --> 01:05:42.350 Well, he must have been quite worrying for him. 01:05:42.730 --> 01:05:49.852 It's like that girl on Big Brother from Liberty X, who was all worried that her boyfriend was going to be upset because he was flirting with Ben. 01:05:50.293 --> 01:05:55.134 Well, she texted in to ask us whether we'd make that clear to Jason, that in no way was that in any way real. 01:05:55.154 --> 01:05:56.115 Don't worry, Jason. 01:05:56.235 --> 01:05:57.295 I'm a sexy man. 01:05:57.315 --> 01:05:59.976 I occasionally share a train with your fiancé. 01:06:00.016 --> 01:06:00.696 He's not sexy. 01:06:01.436 --> 01:06:02.537 But I'm not going to make a move. 01:06:02.697 --> 01:06:03.317 It's all fine. 01:06:03.817 --> 01:06:06.340 Here's a free play, this is Valerie Carter with Ooh Child. 01:06:21.620 --> 01:06:27.525 Hmm, that is like a refreshing bath or shower. 01:06:28.246 --> 01:06:31.929 How would you characterize the refreshing quality of that song? 01:06:33.511 --> 01:06:35.132 Oh, it's like a lovely hot toddy. 01:06:35.533 --> 01:06:37.414 It's like a delicious hot toddy. 01:06:37.434 --> 01:06:39.797 Are you having some brandy in the toddy there? 01:06:40.157 --> 01:06:43.540 No, it's European hot chocolate made from real chocolate flakes. 01:06:44.080 --> 01:06:46.202 Ah, that's the only hot chocolate worth drinking. 01:06:46.863 --> 01:06:54.507 Delicious that was David Bowie with kooks and before that you heard Valerie Carter with her cover of the five stair steps ooh child Don't look at me for that one. 01:06:54.527 --> 01:07:06.154 They wouldn't know yeah, so it was it was wicked one of my favorites It's from the film over the edge starring Matt Dillon my favorite film of all time that film there you go Olly you were asking about our favorite films. 01:07:06.374 --> 01:07:07.174 How you doing there Olly? 01:07:09.655 --> 01:07:12.397 He's yes, he is doing he's there have you seen over the edge Olly? 01:07:13.661 --> 01:07:14.021 No. 01:07:14.041 --> 01:07:14.802 I haven't seen that one. 01:07:14.822 --> 01:07:16.202 It's out on DVD in the UK now. 01:07:16.502 --> 01:07:18.023 Out on DVD in the UK, yeah. 01:07:18.043 --> 01:07:20.104 It's only been out for about eight months. 01:07:20.404 --> 01:07:29.408 Listeners, if you're confused about the references to Wally, this is a chap that emailed us a few weeks ago and asked if he could come into the programme and said that he would sit in silence 01:07:29.588 --> 01:07:31.089 He said he didn't want to say anything. 01:07:31.349 --> 01:07:32.650 So we've taken him at his word. 01:07:32.690 --> 01:07:34.431 He's in the studio, but he's not allowed to speak. 01:07:34.832 --> 01:07:38.514 Instead, he's brought in a frying pan and a wooden spoon in order to communicate. 01:07:38.754 --> 01:07:40.315 One tap means yes, two means no. 01:07:40.735 --> 01:07:46.399 But at the very end of the show, at about three or four minutes to noon, we are going to have Ollie speak. 01:07:47.180 --> 01:07:49.501 So that's something worth tuning in for. 01:07:49.521 --> 01:07:54.264 And if you want to see Ollie's face, or at least the back of his head, you should be able to on the webcam there. 01:07:54.665 --> 01:07:58.687 Ollie, in fact, if you'd like to spin your chair around... Did we establish which webcam it was, Ben? 01:07:58.727 --> 01:07:59.268 Is it that one or...? 01:07:59.688 --> 01:08:00.328 Okay, there's that one. 01:08:00.388 --> 01:08:05.271 And maybe Ollie, if you wouldn't mind, just get comfortable and just look into the camera for the next three or four minutes. 01:08:05.291 --> 01:08:06.092 Just keep your mind. 01:08:06.232 --> 01:08:06.912 Stand up, Ollie. 01:08:07.372 --> 01:08:08.753 And just keep looking at the camera. 01:08:08.773 --> 01:08:09.373 Don't look round. 01:08:09.433 --> 01:08:11.334 Just keep looking at the camera as if you've been back. 01:08:11.354 --> 01:08:14.336 You have to stay there for a while because it refreshes every minute or something. 01:08:14.516 --> 01:08:15.377 Don't look round! 01:08:15.397 --> 01:08:16.817 You've got to stay there for a couple of minutes. 01:08:16.877 --> 01:08:18.979 Keep standing there as if, don't move. 01:08:19.019 --> 01:08:20.119 He's moving. 01:08:20.379 --> 01:08:22.921 Ollie, stand very still, otherwise it won't work. 01:08:23.541 --> 01:08:26.682 because it's a still image that it takes, it's not like constant moving. 01:08:26.782 --> 01:08:27.682 Thank you, Ollie, well done. 01:08:28.422 --> 01:08:34.964 We're in the midst of Tex the Nation and this week's subject is things, pathetic domestic disputes you have with your cohabitees. 01:08:35.484 --> 01:08:37.885 The more petty, but yet divisive, the better. 01:08:38.445 --> 01:08:41.005 And we've been absolutely swamped with these things. 01:08:41.205 --> 01:08:42.346 We could do a book about this. 01:08:42.386 --> 01:08:43.926 We should do a book about this. 01:08:44.006 --> 01:08:47.547 Someone got in touch with us a while back to say, would we like to do a book of egg corns? 01:08:48.027 --> 01:08:50.248 And I just thought, we're not really qualified. 01:08:50.268 --> 01:08:53.649 There's a big website called Egg Quads, I think. 01:08:54.169 --> 01:08:54.929 Ollie sat down. 01:08:55.089 --> 01:08:55.389 Ollie. 01:08:55.509 --> 01:08:55.769 Ollie. 01:08:56.409 --> 01:08:57.109 Was that a minute? 01:08:57.570 --> 01:08:58.990 No one told you you could sit down. 01:08:59.010 --> 01:09:01.351 What's the young people not have any strength in their legs anymore? 01:09:01.471 --> 01:09:03.551 If you're doing too many horse tranquilizers, is it? 01:09:03.571 --> 01:09:03.671 Stand. 01:09:03.751 --> 01:09:05.672 Stand up and look in the webcam. 01:09:05.712 --> 01:09:06.992 And look in the webcam. 01:09:07.012 --> 01:09:07.232 Please. 01:09:07.332 --> 01:09:09.493 Until you are told otherwise, young man. 01:09:10.553 --> 01:09:11.073 Thank you. 01:09:11.093 --> 01:09:12.935 So much attitude. 01:09:13.015 --> 01:09:22.720 So what I was saying is yes, they invited us to do a book of egg corns and I thought it would be fraudulent to do so really because I don't feel that we, you know, we didn't invent egg corns or anything. 01:09:22.800 --> 01:09:23.721 I feel sorry for Ollie. 01:09:23.741 --> 01:09:25.982 Ollie, you just stand there and look at the camera. 01:09:26.463 --> 01:09:27.383 Is that so hard? 01:09:28.564 --> 01:09:30.365 You wanted to come in and feel the magic. 01:09:30.625 --> 01:09:31.786 Here's the magic! 01:09:32.926 --> 01:09:33.907 Look at the camera. 01:09:38.072 --> 01:09:40.754 I want to look at the camera and see his face. 01:09:41.154 --> 01:09:43.175 We can't see his face now because his back's to us. 01:09:43.355 --> 01:09:45.637 Just stay there for a minute and then you can sit down, alright? 01:09:47.418 --> 01:09:51.740 So anyway, I don't know about the egg corns thing, you know, there's a brilliant website full of egg corns. 01:09:52.981 --> 01:09:53.521 tangential. 01:09:53.541 --> 01:09:54.161 I'm going off the thing. 01:09:54.462 --> 01:09:57.002 But yes, we could do a book about domestic irritation. 01:09:57.042 --> 01:09:57.983 Right, so here's one of them. 01:09:58.563 --> 01:10:01.244 Don't forget to put your name if you text. 01:10:01.304 --> 01:10:04.905 You don't have to if you want to remain anonymous, which would be understandable in this context. 01:10:04.985 --> 01:10:06.565 Okay, here's one from an anonymous texter. 01:10:06.945 --> 01:10:14.308 Our domestic bliss is being ruined by my fiancee Magda's failure to grasp the concept that bathroom cupboard doors 01:10:15.368 --> 01:10:17.650 Natural resting state is closed. 01:10:18.410 --> 01:10:25.476 Ever since I fitted new push catches, she keeps leaving them slightly ajar, rendering the spring mechanism of said catches. 01:10:28.438 --> 01:10:36.484 I now find myself sneaking into the bathroom after her every visit like some store cupboard starzy to ensure she shut the doors correctly. 01:10:36.864 --> 01:10:40.327 This is really bugging me and we've not ever reached the marriage stage yet. 01:10:42.188 --> 01:10:45.030 So she's leaving them open, and he's having to creep in and close them. 01:10:45.130 --> 01:10:46.691 You know what, it's dangerous as well. 01:10:47.071 --> 01:10:53.054 He's saying, we're due to get married in May, do you think it would be a good idea to get a prenup drawn up to address this issue? 01:10:53.074 --> 01:10:53.615 Definitely. 01:10:53.975 --> 01:10:54.495 Definitely. 01:10:54.635 --> 01:10:55.956 I think Ollie, you can sit down now. 01:10:55.996 --> 01:10:56.676 Sit down now, Ollie. 01:10:56.696 --> 01:10:56.996 Well done. 01:10:57.597 --> 01:11:00.739 I think if people haven't seen you by now, they're too late. 01:11:00.779 --> 01:11:01.899 He's looking very pleased with himself. 01:11:03.340 --> 01:11:04.782 Yeah, no, that's an important one. 01:11:05.523 --> 01:11:12.210 The worst one is in the kitchen as well, when cupboards get left open, and you're bending down, you're doing a little bit of... Slap your head. 01:11:12.250 --> 01:11:14.533 ...toast work, and you... Very dangerous. 01:11:14.553 --> 01:11:17.857 Rear up, and you can get the corner of the door right in the forehead there. 01:11:17.877 --> 01:11:18.277 That's dangerous. 01:11:18.297 --> 01:11:20.039 That's tantamount to your partner trying to kill you. 01:11:20.140 --> 01:11:20.360 Yeah. 01:11:20.680 --> 01:11:22.481 And that's something that does happen. 01:11:22.621 --> 01:11:23.181 Call the police. 01:11:23.361 --> 01:11:23.561 Yeah. 01:11:23.761 --> 01:11:25.302 Magda is going to be arrested. 01:11:25.382 --> 01:11:25.842 Come on, Mag. 01:11:25.862 --> 01:11:27.322 Here's one from Neil in Nottingham. 01:11:27.362 --> 01:11:29.943 My girlfriend has no concept of towel etiquette. 01:11:30.323 --> 01:11:43.128 Rather than having a couple of towels in rotation, which can be used a couple of times before being replaced by a clean one from the airing cupboard, she uses at least three towels every morning, which she leaves in a damp trail around the bedroom. 01:11:43.308 --> 01:11:44.928 And then who has to pick them up? 01:11:45.208 --> 01:11:45.428 Easy. 01:11:45.448 --> 01:11:46.589 And put them in the washing? 01:11:47.169 --> 01:11:47.789 Easy, Adam. 01:11:48.669 --> 01:11:49.290 This isn't you. 01:11:50.530 --> 01:11:57.872 Rather than using these towels again the next day, she'll head to the airing cupboard and pluck three fresh ones out with complete disregard for the rotation system. 01:11:58.452 --> 01:12:05.274 This results in our house being constantly scattered with damp towels, and we've no idea how long each towel has been in rotation and whether it's due for a wash. 01:12:05.334 --> 01:12:06.054 YOU COW! 01:12:06.074 --> 01:12:07.015 Driving me mad. 01:12:07.035 --> 01:12:08.615 I thought you were going to say something else there. 01:12:09.155 --> 01:12:10.976 It would have been a very brave way to end art. 01:12:11.776 --> 01:12:13.257 tenure here at the BBC. 01:12:13.297 --> 01:12:15.639 That would have got the front page of the Daily Mail. 01:12:15.819 --> 01:12:16.640 Quite a good way to go. 01:12:18.561 --> 01:12:21.263 Yes, well, honestly, Neil, we can only sympathise. 01:12:21.283 --> 01:12:21.963 That's appalling. 01:12:22.284 --> 01:12:24.785 You probably... Do you have separate towels, Adam? 01:12:24.805 --> 01:12:26.247 What, with your toothbrush sharing stuff? 01:12:26.307 --> 01:12:29.649 Or do you happily rub your bits and bobs with whatever comes to hand? 01:12:34.773 --> 01:12:35.774 No answer required. 01:12:35.814 --> 01:12:37.035 We use toilet paper. 01:12:37.235 --> 01:12:40.999 Here's another one which is very well presented and written. 01:12:41.179 --> 01:12:41.999 It's anonymous. 01:12:42.700 --> 01:12:48.886 It says simply this, and there are capitals and lowercase in this text, so I'm going to illustrate the capitals by shouting. 01:12:49.406 --> 01:12:52.648 He hides my hairdryer in the toy box. 01:12:53.348 --> 01:12:56.510 He makes me use a plate if I eat a banana. 01:12:57.011 --> 01:12:58.752 He puts chocolate in the fridge. 01:12:59.893 --> 01:13:01.594 Is this a woman complaining about a man? 01:13:01.614 --> 01:13:02.294 Nobody knows. 01:13:03.014 --> 01:13:04.115 It could be a gay couple. 01:13:04.876 --> 01:13:06.757 It could be a heterosexual couple. 01:13:07.417 --> 01:13:09.859 Makes me use a plate if I eat a banana. 01:13:10.559 --> 01:13:11.840 Now that seems pedantic. 01:13:13.621 --> 01:13:16.404 bananas come with, like, a serving suggestion. 01:13:16.464 --> 01:13:17.546 Chocolate in the fridge. 01:13:17.586 --> 01:13:19.067 I think chocolate in the fridge is okay. 01:13:19.087 --> 01:13:20.369 It adds a little special something to it. 01:13:20.389 --> 01:13:21.790 They used to promote that, didn't they? 01:13:21.810 --> 01:13:22.031 Yeah. 01:13:22.091 --> 01:13:22.731 Cadbury's or whatever. 01:13:22.751 --> 01:13:24.714 They used to promote chocolate as a summer snack. 01:13:24.774 --> 01:13:25.034 That's right. 01:13:25.054 --> 01:13:26.075 That you'd store in the fridge. 01:13:26.175 --> 01:13:27.016 Snickers in the chiller. 01:13:27.176 --> 01:13:28.338 They got any Snickers in the chiller? 01:13:28.778 --> 01:13:30.299 That's what I used to be like in the old days. 01:13:30.499 --> 01:13:31.379 This is from Paul. 01:13:31.680 --> 01:13:37.443 My girlfriend Cassie insists on having the toilet roll dispensing sheets over as opposed to next to the wall. 01:13:37.963 --> 01:13:44.526 However, she rarely replaces the roll onto the holder, choosing instead to balance it on top of the cardboard remains of the old one. 01:13:45.127 --> 01:13:47.048 She refutes this and insists she does. 01:13:48.208 --> 01:13:49.389 You know, that drives me mad as well. 01:13:49.429 --> 01:13:51.910 It doesn't take a second just to reload the roll. 01:13:52.330 --> 01:13:54.872 Yeah, but then to put the used roll in the recycling. 01:13:55.652 --> 01:13:56.912 That's a bit of a journey, isn't it? 01:13:56.952 --> 01:13:58.453 Or make something out of it, a robot. 01:13:58.813 --> 01:14:03.714 In most houses, it's usually quite a distance between the loo and wherever the recycling bag is, right? 01:14:03.754 --> 01:14:08.775 Well, you have a little receptacle there, a temporary recycling receptacle in the bathroom. 01:14:08.795 --> 01:14:09.355 In the bathroom? 01:14:09.395 --> 01:14:12.156 Where your loo roll things go. 01:14:12.296 --> 01:14:12.576 Yes. 01:14:12.796 --> 01:14:13.536 Is that what you have? 01:14:14.677 --> 01:14:17.377 Er, no, I generally make the trip to the recycling bin. 01:14:17.417 --> 01:14:18.398 It's not so very far. 01:14:18.458 --> 01:14:19.178 It's a fun trip. 01:14:19.298 --> 01:14:19.558 Really? 01:14:19.718 --> 01:14:22.479 You would make a whole trip just for that one little two. 01:14:22.519 --> 01:14:22.899 You know what? 01:14:22.959 --> 01:14:23.699 So would I, Ollie. 01:14:25.737 --> 01:14:26.237 Ollie would do. 01:14:26.257 --> 01:14:26.898 Yes, he'd do too. 01:14:26.958 --> 01:14:27.558 We all do that. 01:14:27.578 --> 01:14:27.998 Very good. 01:14:28.018 --> 01:14:28.538 There you go. 01:14:28.618 --> 01:14:29.679 Paul, your girlfriend is wrong. 01:14:29.719 --> 01:14:35.341 Are there things that get put in your fridge, incidentally, talking about the chocolate in the fridge, that you get outraged by? 01:14:35.741 --> 01:14:38.943 Someone in our house puts the ketchup in the fridge. 01:14:39.503 --> 01:14:41.204 Oh, well, my girlfriend likes that a lot. 01:14:41.264 --> 01:14:41.744 She loves the ketchup. 01:14:41.764 --> 01:14:45.926 I don't like cold ketchup, because then you're going to... It's a weird clash. 01:14:45.946 --> 01:14:51.008 You've got your fish fingers there, and suddenly the ketchup comes out and chills out the fish fingers. 01:14:51.028 --> 01:14:51.568 That's no good. 01:14:51.588 --> 01:14:54.790 This doesn't annoy me, but my girlfriend does chill squash. 01:14:55.330 --> 01:14:55.570 Uh-huh. 01:14:55.830 --> 01:14:58.953 Which seems to me a bit stupid, because you're gonna dilute it anyway. 01:14:59.553 --> 01:15:01.375 Oh, what, the actual concentration chills? 01:15:01.835 --> 01:15:02.556 That's madness. 01:15:02.596 --> 01:15:04.617 That's a bit silly, but I don't get angry about it. 01:15:04.637 --> 01:15:05.538 No, no, you should. 01:15:05.818 --> 01:15:06.279 Should I? 01:15:06.459 --> 01:15:09.001 Okay, I'm gonna fill up a head of steam over that one. 01:15:09.301 --> 01:15:11.763 We'll be back with more texts very soon. 01:15:12.103 --> 01:15:12.864 Now here's a trail. 01:15:13.044 --> 01:15:16.086 You were doing your disgruntled granddad look there. 01:15:16.106 --> 01:15:18.108 I just didn't think this, that was Radiohead. 01:15:18.328 --> 01:15:19.228 That's sort of funny. 01:15:19.248 --> 01:15:20.409 And that leads to their noisy tracks. 01:15:20.429 --> 01:15:21.830 That's from the bends, I think, isn't it? 01:15:21.890 --> 01:15:22.630 My eye and lung. 01:15:23.050 --> 01:15:28.252 This is Adam and Jo here on BBC Six Music and we are in the midst of Text-o-nation. 01:15:28.352 --> 01:15:28.693 Yeah. 01:15:29.073 --> 01:15:32.914 What about a bit of jingleage, Ben, to orientate us? 01:15:34.015 --> 01:15:34.835 Text-o-nation. 01:15:34.895 --> 01:15:35.916 Text, text, text. 01:15:36.056 --> 01:15:36.816 Text-o-nation. 01:15:36.856 --> 01:15:37.837 What if I don't want to? 01:15:38.077 --> 01:15:38.737 Text-o-nation. 01:15:38.757 --> 01:15:39.277 It doesn't matter. 01:15:39.337 --> 01:15:39.557 Text. 01:15:42.054 --> 01:15:50.379 And this week we're asking you for pathetic things that your cohabity does around the house that make you go mad with Fury. 01:15:50.639 --> 01:15:50.779 Mmm. 01:15:51.399 --> 01:15:55.221 You know, um, do you want a, uh, name drop? 01:15:55.922 --> 01:15:56.422 Not really. 01:15:56.442 --> 01:15:58.283 No, I thought better of it, actually. 01:15:58.363 --> 01:15:58.623 Really? 01:15:58.743 --> 01:16:05.587 Just as I, as soon as I opened my mouth and I thought about it, I thought there's no point whatsoever in dropping this name. 01:16:05.687 --> 01:16:06.308 It's ridiculous. 01:16:06.328 --> 01:16:07.208 Well, you should do it now. 01:16:08.909 --> 01:16:10.770 Well, it's so we should okay. 01:16:10.790 --> 01:16:11.291 Let's not do it. 01:16:11.471 --> 01:16:16.754 Let's not do the no name drop Was it to do with the text the nation subject kind of kind of but only tangentially? 01:16:17.095 --> 01:16:36.267 Yeah, I mean it was so tenuous then you know I've been finding it difficult to think of things that wind me up In a bit of a squeaky clean way, you know about my paradise it is it is paradise But something someone sent in has reminded me of something that really annoys me Yeah about my beautiful lovely cohabiting lady friend. 01:16:36.588 --> 01:16:38.529 This is an email from Steven in Norwich 01:16:39.589 --> 01:16:40.730 He says, hello Adam and Jo. 01:16:41.110 --> 01:16:48.192 My new housemate yawns like a trapped bear, often waking me up in the middle of the night or interfering with my enjoyment of the telly. 01:16:48.592 --> 01:16:50.853 He says it's because he lived on his own for too long. 01:16:51.393 --> 01:16:54.474 Shall I ask him to be more discreet by placing a hand over his mouth? 01:16:54.934 --> 01:16:55.234 Oh sure. 01:16:55.274 --> 01:16:55.935 Or the best Stephen. 01:16:56.315 --> 01:16:59.076 Now that's something that my lovely lady partner does. 01:16:59.636 --> 01:17:00.016 She goes, 01:17:02.461 --> 01:17:02.821 A lot. 01:17:03.081 --> 01:17:05.062 Well, it's very contagious, is the other thing. 01:17:05.082 --> 01:17:05.462 A lot. 01:17:06.182 --> 01:17:06.802 A lot. 01:17:06.902 --> 01:17:07.262 A lot. 01:17:07.462 --> 01:17:11.663 And after a while, it feels like she finds life as a whole boring. 01:17:11.703 --> 01:17:12.784 A bit boring. 01:17:12.804 --> 01:17:15.724 It feels like she's just tired of life, of existence. 01:17:16.044 --> 01:17:17.645 She needs more oxygen in her mixture. 01:17:17.705 --> 01:17:18.525 Maybe she does. 01:17:19.245 --> 01:17:20.566 Makes me feel insecure. 01:17:20.626 --> 01:17:22.146 I think I'm not being exciting enough. 01:17:22.466 --> 01:17:22.686 Right. 01:17:22.806 --> 01:17:23.146 You know? 01:17:23.546 --> 01:17:24.367 She's weary. 01:17:24.567 --> 01:17:25.647 She's w-exactly. 01:17:25.927 --> 01:17:27.548 It makes her sound world-weary. 01:17:27.628 --> 01:17:28.388 She's not at all. 01:17:28.748 --> 01:17:29.629 And it annoys me. 01:17:29.729 --> 01:17:32.610 Well, she works very hard, though, and maybe she gets up early. 01:17:33.150 --> 01:17:33.830 She does do that. 01:17:33.990 --> 01:17:34.350 Yeah. 01:17:35.051 --> 01:17:36.131 Uh, that's true, though, Stephen. 01:17:36.171 --> 01:17:36.671 That's annoying. 01:17:36.691 --> 01:17:37.892 What do you think Stephen should do? 01:17:38.232 --> 01:17:44.094 I think what Stephen should do is do what my dad used to do with our cat every time it yawned, which is pop something in the mouth. 01:17:44.674 --> 01:17:53.119 When it's wide open, my dad would just pop his finger in the cat's mouth and then enjoy the look on its face when it's Jaws clothes. 01:17:53.899 --> 01:17:54.820 So that's a good thing to do. 01:17:54.860 --> 01:17:56.501 When your friend yawns, just pop something in. 01:17:56.541 --> 01:17:57.682 Nothing they'll choke on. 01:17:57.862 --> 01:17:58.142 No. 01:17:58.202 --> 01:18:00.063 Listeners, we don't want to encourage that kind of thing. 01:18:00.083 --> 01:18:00.623 No little marbles. 01:18:00.643 --> 01:18:03.265 Maybe a pen laterally in the mouth, like so. 01:18:03.905 --> 01:18:04.846 Well, you could do something nice. 01:18:04.866 --> 01:18:06.847 You could pop a little more teaser in there or something. 01:18:06.947 --> 01:18:09.329 I think I'd say something else for a moment. 01:18:09.389 --> 01:18:10.770 But yawning is a good one, though, isn't it? 01:18:10.830 --> 01:18:12.231 And it's very contagious. 01:18:12.351 --> 01:18:16.614 Even people hearing you doing that yawn there will start yawning themselves. 01:18:16.634 --> 01:18:17.894 Well, but fake yawns aren't contagious. 01:18:17.975 --> 01:18:18.375 They are. 01:18:18.675 --> 01:18:19.015 Are they? 01:18:19.275 --> 01:18:21.317 I always thought you had to do an authentic yawn. 01:18:21.417 --> 01:18:23.398 I can feel a yawn coming on just talking about it. 01:18:23.418 --> 01:18:23.598 Really? 01:18:23.979 --> 01:18:24.119 Yeah. 01:18:24.739 --> 01:18:25.860 Here's another one from Simon. 01:18:25.880 --> 01:18:37.468 He says, Morning, Adam and Joe, I used to go spare when my ex-housemate used to come down from the shower and sit on the sofa for a few minutes in his wet towel, always leaving a moist, R-shaped patch for a good couple of days. 01:18:37.488 --> 01:18:38.548 That's a disgrace. 01:18:38.568 --> 01:18:39.469 That is a disgrace. 01:18:39.729 --> 01:18:42.031 Ugh, how, what are these people doing? 01:18:42.091 --> 01:18:42.771 That's nice, though. 01:18:42.791 --> 01:18:46.414 I can feel, I've got a sense memory of a wet towel on my bottom right now. 01:18:46.674 --> 01:18:46.934 No. 01:18:47.294 --> 01:18:47.975 Why is that good? 01:18:48.015 --> 01:18:48.575 That's horrid. 01:18:48.595 --> 01:18:49.335 It's nice. 01:18:49.636 --> 01:18:54.219 And you should not go wandering around other parts of the house before you're properly dry! 01:18:54.599 --> 01:18:54.676 you 01:18:55.620 --> 01:18:56.040 Yes. 01:18:56.120 --> 01:18:56.741 Go on, give me some more. 01:18:56.761 --> 01:18:57.121 I love these. 01:18:57.201 --> 01:18:57.982 More, more, more. 01:18:58.142 --> 01:19:00.383 OK, here is one from Louisa. 01:19:00.524 --> 01:19:04.246 She says, I have these lovely pastel enamel pans that were a wedding present. 01:19:04.707 --> 01:19:10.291 My husband never uses the silicone spatula for stirring things in these, but uses forks, which scratch the enamel. 01:19:10.571 --> 01:19:14.874 Perversely, he then uses the special spatula to stir things in the frying pan, which melts it. 01:19:14.894 --> 01:19:15.574 Oh, dear. 01:19:15.594 --> 01:19:19.177 You know, I would probably be guilty of abusive pans in my house. 01:19:19.737 --> 01:19:24.381 Sometimes I got a lovely Teflon pan, a beautiful nonstick surface there. 01:19:25.001 --> 01:19:31.845 But, uh, I want to get it so clean that I sometimes just use a scour on it, like a, um, wire wall. 01:19:31.865 --> 01:19:32.446 Yeah, that's wrong. 01:19:32.486 --> 01:19:33.066 You damage it. 01:19:33.146 --> 01:19:33.687 That's really bad. 01:19:33.707 --> 01:19:34.267 You damage it. 01:19:34.407 --> 01:19:36.608 I'm scraping off the Teflon surface there. 01:19:36.688 --> 01:19:42.652 Here's a text from Matt, who says, my wife always leaves the upstairs cupboard door open, so I took it off and burnt it. 01:19:44.393 --> 01:19:44.513 Ahhh! 01:19:44.713 --> 01:19:45.354 Well done Matt. 01:19:45.374 --> 01:19:45.954 That's very good. 01:19:46.034 --> 01:19:49.415 At which point I think we should play some music and come back to Texanation a little bit later on. 01:19:49.455 --> 01:19:49.555 Okay. 01:19:49.995 --> 01:19:51.496 Here's a free play for you now listeners. 01:19:51.916 --> 01:19:55.598 This is The Only Ones, and I'd always been aware of The Only Ones, right? 01:19:55.638 --> 01:19:59.199 They were a great band from the 70s, late 70s. 01:19:59.299 --> 01:20:03.041 They were sort of around in the punk world, but they sounded very different. 01:20:03.141 --> 01:20:05.342 They're a little bit like Joe Jackson, maybe more 01:20:05.882 --> 01:20:07.063 I don't know, it's hard to describe. 01:20:07.103 --> 01:20:08.584 They sound like Steve Harley and Cockney Rebel. 01:20:08.604 --> 01:20:10.044 I'm going to play you some, obviously, right now. 01:20:10.305 --> 01:20:16.868 But they reissued their seminal three albums recently, and this one is a track from Even Serpent's Shine. 01:20:17.189 --> 01:20:18.149 They're a revelation though. 01:20:18.169 --> 01:20:19.550 These albums are amazingly good. 01:20:19.650 --> 01:20:21.291 This track is called You've Got to Pay. 01:20:21.511 --> 01:20:22.211 That's nice, isn't it? 01:20:22.351 --> 01:20:23.172 That's very good, isn't it? 01:20:23.212 --> 01:20:24.872 Peter Parrott there with the only ones. 01:20:25.312 --> 01:20:27.133 And you've got to pay! 01:20:27.193 --> 01:20:30.274 This is Adam and Joe here on BBC Six Music. 01:20:30.314 --> 01:20:32.314 Do you want to hear about my earthquake experience? 01:20:32.334 --> 01:20:33.294 Do you have an earthquake experience? 01:20:33.314 --> 01:20:34.395 Yeah, I was in an earthquake. 01:20:34.475 --> 01:20:35.035 In Los Angeles? 01:20:35.055 --> 01:20:36.175 Los Angeles, yeah. 01:20:36.535 --> 01:20:39.636 Me and Simon Pegg, the popular actor, went to the cinema. 01:20:39.776 --> 01:20:40.457 Nice name drop. 01:20:40.497 --> 01:20:41.037 Thanks, mate. 01:20:41.477 --> 01:20:43.597 It's not really a name drop, it's just a statement of fact. 01:20:44.778 --> 01:20:45.058 Right? 01:20:45.238 --> 01:20:46.598 I'm like your ones that are lies. 01:20:47.178 --> 01:20:48.199 We went to the cinema! 01:20:49.259 --> 01:20:49.639 the film. 01:21:07.509 --> 01:21:15.512 a remake of Last House on the Left, something called The Uninvited, the remake of Friday the 13th, they were all the same and they were all terrifying. 01:21:15.913 --> 01:21:28.718 They were just montages of teenagers screaming and being hacked to pieces, terrifying words floating around on a misty screen, you know, weird elliptical lines of dialogue and shouts and screams and noises and fangs. 01:21:28.738 --> 01:21:30.439 That was all those big trails in Grind House. 01:21:30.939 --> 01:21:37.385 It was a little like that, but not as good, and also the surround sound was so powerful that it felt as if it was an earthquake anyway. 01:21:38.025 --> 01:21:45.052 And at the climax of these three interchangeable, increasingly troubling trailers, suddenly there was an enormous boom. 01:21:45.532 --> 01:21:49.395 It felt like they were showing the loudest action film ever made in the next-door cinema. 01:21:49.656 --> 01:21:50.677 But it was so visceral. 01:21:51.477 --> 01:21:54.018 And we experienced one in Tokyo, didn't we? 01:21:54.038 --> 01:21:55.098 Did you remember that earthquake? 01:21:55.118 --> 01:21:59.460 But that was not accompanied by a noise, it was just a... No, it was an increasing vibration. 01:21:59.480 --> 01:22:03.361 This one was like an explosion, it was as if a plane had gone down or a bomb had gone off. 01:22:03.441 --> 01:22:04.441 Wow, how frightening. 01:22:04.901 --> 01:22:15.605 And everyone's seat jolted and everyone was really unsettled and suddenly everyone in the cinema turned and looked at each other in a way that wouldn't happen under any other circumstances, I don't think. 01:22:15.765 --> 01:22:18.686 Suddenly everybody wanted to make human contact, eye contact. 01:22:18.846 --> 01:22:19.246 Yeah, hold hands. 01:22:19.286 --> 01:22:21.388 And there was a long pause, a long silence. 01:22:21.408 --> 01:22:24.190 And then someone said... And somebody said, earthquake going down! 01:22:24.210 --> 01:22:25.051 Oh, right. 01:22:25.391 --> 01:22:25.851 That's it. 01:22:26.692 --> 01:22:29.995 But it was very exciting, and the film really didn't live up to it. 01:22:30.335 --> 01:22:36.099 I didn't know that earthquakes were accompanied by booms and... Yeah, I think we were very near the epicentre. 01:22:36.600 --> 01:22:37.820 It was very exciting. 01:22:37.961 --> 01:22:38.461 Wow. 01:22:38.521 --> 01:22:40.883 Yeah, and that'll probably be the headline in the news. 01:22:41.183 --> 01:22:41.643 Yes. 01:22:41.763 --> 01:22:42.324 Let's find out. 01:22:42.384 --> 01:22:43.004 Here is the news. 01:22:43.805 --> 01:22:46.207 That is Mykonos by FleetFoxes. 01:22:46.287 --> 01:22:47.508 Is that their current single then? 01:22:47.868 --> 01:22:48.788 No, is it? 01:22:48.828 --> 01:22:50.789 Well, that was one of their first singles. 01:22:50.849 --> 01:22:54.049 It was the EP they released when they first of all came out, right? 01:22:55.430 --> 01:22:56.670 And it's now been re-released. 01:22:57.190 --> 01:23:01.851 And they've actually, I picked up a CD of theirs in Amoeba Records in LA. 01:23:02.111 --> 01:23:02.932 I haven't played yet. 01:23:03.532 --> 01:23:06.632 But they're so popular, they're kind of releasing everything they've ever recorded. 01:23:06.692 --> 01:23:06.932 Yeah. 01:23:07.252 --> 01:23:08.953 And they've discovered another four tracks. 01:23:09.133 --> 01:23:11.193 Well, they were quite good from the get-go, weren't they? 01:23:11.213 --> 01:23:13.654 They arrived fully formed, musically speaking. 01:23:13.994 --> 01:23:15.676 So you can't really go wrong with some of those. 01:23:15.696 --> 01:23:18.820 Yeah, well I'll check them out and listen to them and if they're good I'll play one next week. 01:23:19.081 --> 01:23:20.582 It's time to wrap up Text the Nation. 01:23:20.602 --> 01:23:22.144 Let's have the jingle one more time, Ben. 01:23:24.407 --> 01:23:25.168 Text the Nation! 01:23:25.288 --> 01:23:25.549 Text! 01:23:25.649 --> 01:23:25.929 Text! 01:23:25.989 --> 01:23:26.309 Text! 01:23:26.450 --> 01:23:27.211 Text the Nation! 01:23:27.271 --> 01:23:28.192 What if I don't want to? 01:23:28.212 --> 01:23:29.133 Text the Nation! 01:23:29.153 --> 01:23:29.674 It doesn't matter. 01:23:29.754 --> 01:23:29.954 Text! 01:23:32.526 --> 01:23:39.851 Text the Nation this week, listeners, is about domestic friction caused by very petty things, household things. 01:23:39.911 --> 01:23:41.812 I think very petty is putting it too strongly. 01:23:41.832 --> 01:23:43.453 Some of these are very valid complaints. 01:23:43.493 --> 01:23:50.238 And these are all springing from a terrifying, yet another terrifying glimpse inside the domestic arrangements of Mr. Buxton. 01:23:50.398 --> 01:23:53.140 It does sound horrible, the picture I paint of my life, doesn't it? 01:23:53.200 --> 01:23:55.261 No, it's mitigated by your honesty. 01:23:55.301 --> 01:23:57.723 The fact that you're so candid about them shows that your 01:23:59.263 --> 01:24:19.827 Nature is so no so open that all these problems aren't really a problem So, you know, I do love my wife and my family very much and I wouldn't like anyone to think otherwise But I wish she would just pay attention to some of my valid points about the dishwasher What you want to do is start wearing uniforms around the house. 01:24:19.987 --> 01:24:23.888 That's a good idea uniform for you a uniform for her little uniforms for the kids 01:24:25.487 --> 01:24:26.908 And a proper hierarchy. 01:24:27.008 --> 01:24:27.429 Metals. 01:24:27.729 --> 01:24:27.949 Yeah. 01:24:28.389 --> 01:24:29.290 And stripes. 01:24:29.530 --> 01:24:30.291 What kind of uniforms? 01:24:30.311 --> 01:24:31.632 I'm thinking orange boiler suits. 01:24:32.953 --> 01:24:34.434 Well, that's a bit space age, isn't it? 01:24:34.494 --> 01:24:39.237 I was thinking more Nazi type thing. 01:24:39.398 --> 01:24:40.779 Well, I don't think that's a good way to go. 01:24:40.799 --> 01:24:41.479 That's not suitable, is it? 01:24:41.519 --> 01:24:42.700 That gets you into trouble. 01:24:43.381 --> 01:24:44.782 That sort of talk these days. 01:24:45.222 --> 01:24:45.903 But you know what I mean? 01:24:45.923 --> 01:24:50.726 I was saying in jest, but I would be more officious about it than maybe you would be. 01:24:50.786 --> 01:24:52.548 Hey, it's more Prince Harry. 01:24:53.368 --> 01:24:56.249 Okay, here is one that has come in from an anonymous person. 01:24:56.789 --> 01:24:58.529 And this is one I sympathise with a lot. 01:24:58.869 --> 01:25:03.770 When going to bed, my girlfriend manages to slip out of all her clothes in one smooth movement. 01:25:03.891 --> 01:25:04.071 Like it. 01:25:04.371 --> 01:25:12.092 This results in little piles of clothes dotted on the bedroom floor with her bra inside her t-shirt, both inside her jumper, on top of her jeans. 01:25:12.493 --> 01:25:16.573 Very similar to her being vaporised by a ray gun in her 70s sci-fi series. 01:25:16.954 --> 01:25:20.094 With her clothes as the only thing that remain hanging in the air before falling to the ground. 01:25:20.414 --> 01:25:21.855 My girlfriend does exactly the same. 01:25:21.875 --> 01:25:22.875 Why would that be irritating? 01:25:22.995 --> 01:25:25.857 Because you have to pick them up and you have to sort of pull them out of each other. 01:25:26.197 --> 01:25:29.840 And it is, there is something weird, that's a very good description that she's been vaporised. 01:25:30.000 --> 01:25:30.320 Yeah. 01:25:30.960 --> 01:25:36.764 It would just be nice to think that somebody before they went to bed took the articles of clothing off one by one and then folded them up neatly and put them away. 01:25:36.784 --> 01:25:44.089 Well you know what my wife sometimes does is pull off her clothes and so they end up inside out and then puts them in the washing bin and that's in that state. 01:25:44.109 --> 01:25:44.569 All tangled up. 01:25:44.909 --> 01:25:48.092 So when I do the wash and I get them out of the machine, it's up to me to 01:25:49.072 --> 01:25:57.098 Put them all the right way around again, and I have to reach inside a damp tube sleeve You know what I'm saying and and pull it the right way out. 01:25:57.538 --> 01:26:17.653 It makes me furious I think what that anonymous texture is skirting around is the idea of taking off the trousers or stroke skirt and the pants stroke knickknocks simultaneously and the and and if you imagine what sort of a sort of puddle of clothing that leaves on the floor sexy one 01:26:17.893 --> 01:26:19.534 And what you're... Yeah, kind of. 01:26:19.894 --> 01:26:20.114 Yeah. 01:26:20.314 --> 01:26:24.115 Oh, it's not an area you want to go into on a Saturday morning show, really. 01:26:24.215 --> 01:26:24.455 No. 01:26:24.635 --> 01:26:25.436 But you can imagine. 01:26:25.616 --> 01:26:26.176 Oh, I see. 01:26:26.356 --> 01:26:27.036 Okay, carry on. 01:26:27.056 --> 01:26:27.296 Yeah. 01:26:27.736 --> 01:26:29.737 Here's one from Liz that's coming via text. 01:26:29.797 --> 01:26:31.998 My partner Pete will not let me share his pillows. 01:26:32.398 --> 01:26:41.821 If I pile them up high under my head and he's already got up, he comes up and pulls the extra pillows away and puts them back on his side with East Enders-ish criminal intensity. 01:26:42.201 --> 01:26:43.342 This inflames me. 01:26:43.462 --> 01:26:44.422 My partner needs pillows. 01:26:45.122 --> 01:26:47.163 Then I insist on having the pillows back. 01:26:47.643 --> 01:26:49.725 Well, oh, my computer just shut off. 01:26:50.086 --> 01:26:52.348 He even bought me more pillows, but it's no good. 01:26:52.388 --> 01:26:53.709 It's his pillows I want. 01:26:54.410 --> 01:26:55.831 Why won't he let me share them? 01:26:56.091 --> 01:26:56.712 Says Liz. 01:26:56.832 --> 01:27:03.539 I don't want anyone to... I have a particular pillow that I very much favour, and if anyone's gonna start moving it to their side of the bed. 01:27:04.219 --> 01:27:05.300 They can expect to fight. 01:27:05.380 --> 01:27:06.701 What do you favor about the pillow? 01:27:07.161 --> 01:27:10.504 It's very squishy, it's not too large. 01:27:10.544 --> 01:27:21.272 You know, I like my head to be fairly close to the mattress, so it's one that is sufficiently squidgy that I can hollow it out and it makes a nice little hole for my head that I can fit in there. 01:27:22.093 --> 01:27:25.815 And, you know, the other pillows on the bed, they're much too fulsome. 01:27:26.576 --> 01:27:27.397 I don't like them. 01:27:28.018 --> 01:27:30.261 Here's one from Andy in Hartlepool. 01:27:31.002 --> 01:27:34.587 I organized the shoe cupboard, giving myself a little area. 01:27:35.087 --> 01:27:38.391 To my horror, the girlfriend invaded my space. 01:27:38.992 --> 01:27:44.279 I asked her not to invade my space, and we ended up not talking for two days. 01:27:45.120 --> 01:27:46.121 Andy in Hartlepool. 01:27:46.161 --> 01:27:47.603 You read it in that voice though. 01:27:48.184 --> 01:27:50.006 Andy's probably a very reasonable guy. 01:27:50.286 --> 01:27:50.527 No. 01:27:50.567 --> 01:27:52.830 And he doesn't talk like a Nazi robot. 01:27:53.370 --> 01:28:00.619 When you start a sentence, I organised the shoe cupboard. 01:28:01.079 --> 01:28:04.544 Don't belittle the legitimate gripes of Andy in the shoe cupboard. 01:28:05.749 --> 01:28:06.069 Yeah. 01:28:06.209 --> 01:28:06.689 You know what? 01:28:06.749 --> 01:28:08.330 I think that's all I've actually prepared. 01:28:08.370 --> 01:28:10.890 I could read some random ones out that I haven't known. 01:28:10.950 --> 01:28:12.030 Ben's winding the whole thing up. 01:28:12.050 --> 01:28:15.551 We've only got a quarter of an hour and we still have to talk to Ollie the Wally before the end of the show. 01:28:15.591 --> 01:28:16.431 Hey. 01:28:16.631 --> 01:28:17.972 I'm not allowed to call him Ollie the Wally, am I? 01:28:17.992 --> 01:28:19.272 Poor, he's taking it very well. 01:28:19.292 --> 01:28:21.712 Ollie ain't no Wally. 01:28:21.732 --> 01:28:23.353 I've never seen anybody less Wally-ish. 01:28:23.433 --> 01:28:24.053 No, he's cool. 01:28:24.153 --> 01:28:29.674 For you to call him a Wally is very much pop kettle black, if you ask me. 01:28:29.714 --> 01:28:30.394 It's time for trail. 01:28:31.774 --> 01:28:33.955 I never heard all the little things going on in the background there. 01:28:34.855 --> 01:28:54.914 that was the fun young cannibals with what's that actually called that single uh johnny come home there you go adam and joe here on bbc6 music now as we explained earlier we've been joined in the studio by a guest it's a very rare occurrence for us here on this program we don't normally have guests we've had chris salt the salt man the winner of the video wars competition we've had lord roger more yeah 01:28:55.935 --> 01:28:56.716 Uh, is that it? 01:28:56.756 --> 01:28:57.676 Lord Sir Roger, yeah. 01:28:57.716 --> 01:29:00.878 God Jennings has sat in for me when I've been away. 01:29:01.458 --> 01:29:04.560 So you are officially the fourth guest we have ever had, Wally. 01:29:04.580 --> 01:29:05.481 Please don't speak yet. 01:29:05.561 --> 01:29:07.502 We had the guy that did the remixing of the song. 01:29:07.562 --> 01:29:09.403 Ah, that's absolutely right, Amber Gambler. 01:29:09.443 --> 01:29:09.703 Yeah. 01:29:10.624 --> 01:29:11.885 Um, so you're the fifth. 01:29:12.905 --> 01:29:18.409 But you know, in many ways, you're the most skilled of all the guests with your frying pan tapping. 01:29:19.609 --> 01:29:27.352 Ollie emailed us three or four or five weeks ago saying he'd like to come into the studio and feel the magic, but he didn't want to say anything. 01:29:27.812 --> 01:29:29.012 So we took him at his word. 01:29:29.493 --> 01:29:31.873 He was on the phone and he wasn't allowed to speak. 01:29:31.913 --> 01:29:33.134 He had to scratch the receiver. 01:29:33.154 --> 01:29:37.135 Now he is live in the studio, but he hasn't been allowed to speak at all. 01:29:37.195 --> 01:29:44.778 He's been viewable on the webcam and he's been communicating by tapping a frying pan with a wooden spoon. 01:29:45.958 --> 01:29:47.419 But now, are we going to let him speak? 01:29:47.699 --> 01:29:48.379 I think we should. 01:29:48.979 --> 01:29:51.340 So, ladies and gentlemen, here is Ollie. 01:29:51.440 --> 01:29:53.501 Ollie, please say hello to the listeners. 01:29:54.202 --> 01:29:54.522 Hello. 01:29:55.282 --> 01:29:55.742 There we go. 01:29:57.143 --> 01:29:58.003 He sounds like Naboo. 01:29:58.283 --> 01:30:02.685 Now, Ollie, you wanted to experience the magic rushing round the studio. 01:30:03.065 --> 01:30:07.727 Let me ask you, before you came into the studio, did you have preconceptions of what it might be like? 01:30:07.807 --> 01:30:11.309 Had you painted a mental picture with the emphasis on the word mental? 01:30:11.929 --> 01:30:13.330 Had you painted a picture in your head? 01:30:13.350 --> 01:30:16.833 Or hadn't you thought about it? 01:30:17.013 --> 01:30:18.154 No, you just didn't. 01:30:18.315 --> 01:30:20.496 I took it as it came. 01:30:21.397 --> 01:30:26.481 And now that you're here, is it as magical as you had hoped it would be? 01:30:26.782 --> 01:30:27.842 Yes, more magical. 01:30:28.203 --> 01:30:33.587 Describe some exciting things that you think listeners might want to know about the magic of this programme. 01:30:34.828 --> 01:30:40.793 Um, yeah, it's really magical and uh... He's Naboo. 01:30:40.833 --> 01:30:41.914 Just imagine Naboo. 01:30:42.234 --> 01:30:53.764 Anything surprising, you know, anything surprising for people who might, you know, want to see through your eyes about the way Adam and I behave or the show is laid out or anything like that? 01:30:54.244 --> 01:30:56.505 No, it's all very organised and lovely. 01:30:56.985 --> 01:30:58.466 Now Ollie, what do you do for a living? 01:30:58.686 --> 01:30:59.646 I'm a computer technician. 01:31:00.506 --> 01:31:02.027 Ah, you love computers? 01:31:02.207 --> 01:31:02.427 Yes. 01:31:02.527 --> 01:31:03.568 Do you love them more than people? 01:31:04.088 --> 01:31:04.428 Ah, yes. 01:31:04.768 --> 01:31:06.049 What's your favourite type of computer? 01:31:06.089 --> 01:31:07.769 Are you a Macintosh or a Windows person? 01:31:07.789 --> 01:31:08.009 Windows. 01:31:08.349 --> 01:31:08.890 Right. 01:31:09.390 --> 01:31:10.090 A weirdo. 01:31:13.031 --> 01:31:14.252 And what's your favourite band? 01:31:15.072 --> 01:31:16.132 Just doing a quick interview with Ollie. 01:31:16.152 --> 01:31:16.793 Yes, nice man. 01:31:16.833 --> 01:31:18.613 What's your favourite band? 01:31:18.733 --> 01:31:19.594 Probably Fleetwood Mac. 01:31:20.274 --> 01:31:21.496 Is that a serious answer? 01:31:21.916 --> 01:31:22.157 Yeah. 01:31:22.177 --> 01:31:24.600 You love early Mac or late Mac? 01:31:25.220 --> 01:31:26.081 Mmm, old bit really. 01:31:26.542 --> 01:31:28.104 Bernie Mac, did you like his work? 01:31:28.204 --> 01:31:28.665 Bernie Mac. 01:31:29.105 --> 01:31:29.646 Big Macs? 01:31:30.467 --> 01:31:31.869 Yes. 01:31:31.929 --> 01:31:33.210 Seriously, do you love Fleetwood Mac? 01:31:33.391 --> 01:31:33.531 Yes. 01:31:33.691 --> 01:31:35.734 I was talking to someone else the other day who was going on about early. 01:31:35.814 --> 01:31:37.456 What's the best album to get of theirs then? 01:31:38.197 --> 01:31:38.717 Greatest Hits. 01:31:39.358 --> 01:31:40.579 greatest hit seriously. 01:31:40.739 --> 01:31:42.541 Yeah, because it's great. 01:31:42.561 --> 01:31:43.442 It's got hits on. 01:31:43.963 --> 01:31:44.203 Fair enough. 01:31:44.223 --> 01:31:44.964 That's the only one I have. 01:31:45.164 --> 01:31:47.346 Favorite film we know is 28 Days Later. 01:31:48.327 --> 01:31:49.288 Favorite TV show? 01:31:49.628 --> 01:31:50.209 Comedy show? 01:31:51.510 --> 01:31:52.931 Not comedy, but 24 probably. 01:31:53.472 --> 01:31:53.952 You like 24? 01:31:54.253 --> 01:31:55.234 Good news series, eh? 01:31:55.814 --> 01:31:56.515 Quite exciting. 01:31:56.715 --> 01:31:57.316 How about Lost? 01:31:57.616 --> 01:31:58.377 This is riveting. 01:31:58.517 --> 01:32:00.158 You should take over from Jonathan Ross. 01:32:00.839 --> 01:32:01.980 Honestly, I could do it easily. 01:32:02.000 --> 01:32:02.500 You'd be good. 01:32:02.600 --> 01:32:03.261 I would be excited. 01:32:03.281 --> 01:32:05.823 Why don't they ask major movie stars questions like that? 01:32:05.903 --> 01:32:06.603 What's your favorite band? 01:32:06.964 --> 01:32:07.704 Matt Corpezing. 01:32:08.605 --> 01:32:09.285 What'd you do for a living? 01:32:09.365 --> 01:32:10.406 I think it would be more interesting. 01:32:10.426 --> 01:32:10.726 It would. 01:32:10.826 --> 01:32:11.167 It would. 01:32:11.627 --> 01:32:13.048 General, that's all. 01:32:14.029 --> 01:32:14.789 Well, that's pretty much it. 01:32:14.869 --> 01:32:16.350 But Ollie, thank you so much for coming in. 01:32:16.390 --> 01:32:17.011 We really appreciate it. 01:32:17.031 --> 01:32:20.754 And we hope you don't feel as if you were mistreated or humiliated in any way, do you? 01:32:20.954 --> 01:32:21.774 No, not in any way at all. 01:32:21.794 --> 01:32:23.476 We didn't mistreat or humiliate him enough. 01:32:23.576 --> 01:32:25.417 We shouted at him to stand at the webcam. 01:32:25.457 --> 01:32:25.697 You did. 01:32:25.717 --> 01:32:28.459 Yeah, it's been a great time. 01:32:28.499 --> 01:32:29.100 Thank you for having me. 01:32:29.560 --> 01:32:30.441 Good, no, not at all. 01:32:30.461 --> 01:32:31.642 You're very welcome indeed. 01:32:32.143 --> 01:32:34.605 You're never allowed to come back. 01:32:34.685 --> 01:32:35.226 Keep away. 01:32:35.426 --> 01:32:38.769 And if I ever see you in the street or anything like that, I will call the police. 01:32:38.789 --> 01:32:43.113 Yeah, and don't tell anyone any of the things we told you between when the records were playing. 01:32:43.774 --> 01:32:45.556 Or don't tell anyone what we did together. 01:32:46.776 --> 01:32:48.497 While the records were playing, please. 01:32:49.037 --> 01:32:49.338 Okay. 01:32:49.678 --> 01:32:50.678 Cheers then, Ollie. 01:32:50.758 --> 01:32:54.120 We're gonna play a little bit more music before we say goodbye to you now, ladies and gentlemen. 01:32:54.660 --> 01:32:56.661 And which one are we going to go for, Ben? 01:32:57.041 --> 01:32:57.361 Which one? 01:32:57.721 --> 01:32:58.462 PJ Harvey. 01:32:58.582 --> 01:33:01.643 Yeah, this is PJ Harvey with Sheila Naggeek. 01:33:01.963 --> 01:33:03.224 PJ Harvey there. 01:33:03.324 --> 01:33:05.666 That's pretty much it for our show this week, ladies and gentlemen. 01:33:06.246 --> 01:33:17.934 A couple of weeks ago, on the pre-record, we were talking about pop psychology, the notion that we might have a new feature, because we're giving song wars a little bit of a rest for a few weeks, and we need something else to fill the show with. 01:33:18.314 --> 01:33:38.786 And we were thinking that if people in bands would tell us their niggles, particularly people that aren't lead singers, right, if you're a bassist or a drummer or a keyboard player in a band, and you don't necessarily have to be like a massive well-known band, but we would really like to hear your problems within the structure of the band and some of the, you know, niggles that you have about that. 01:33:39.186 --> 01:33:42.108 And Joe, our residential pop psychologist, 01:33:42.648 --> 01:33:43.628 We'll give you some advice. 01:33:43.668 --> 01:33:44.429 I mean, we both will, right? 01:33:44.609 --> 01:33:45.629 I'm a trained psychologist. 01:33:45.729 --> 01:33:46.869 Joe's a trained psychologist. 01:33:47.290 --> 01:33:48.370 That's why I work with Adam. 01:33:48.430 --> 01:33:51.631 Nobody else would be capable of enduring it. 01:33:51.771 --> 01:33:52.271 That's right. 01:33:52.892 --> 01:33:57.273 So we would really like to encourage you, if you're in a band, to get in touch. 01:33:57.313 --> 01:33:58.133 You can be anonymous. 01:33:58.513 --> 01:34:01.334 If you're in a famous band, you don't have to say which one it is, necessarily. 01:34:01.354 --> 01:34:02.935 Although you can tell us, but we won't read it out. 01:34:03.055 --> 01:34:06.997 We're talking about petty jealousies, things that annoy you about other band members' behaviours. 01:34:07.057 --> 01:34:17.661 If people are trying to hoggle the limelight, push to the front during photo sessions, trying to drown you out by telling their amplifier up higher, anything that is threatening to come between you if you're in a band. 01:34:17.801 --> 01:34:21.323 The more anecdotal the better we'd like, you know, little stories about what it's like. 01:34:21.323 --> 01:34:25.084 The email address is adamandjoe.6musicatbbc.co.uk. 01:34:25.104 --> 01:34:27.005 You can email us at any point. 01:34:27.185 --> 01:34:30.366 Every single email is read by either me or Adam. 01:34:31.727 --> 01:34:32.587 And that's it really. 01:34:32.627 --> 01:34:37.609 Thanks a lot for listening and thanks to everybody who texted for Text the Nation and who emailed in during the week. 01:34:37.769 --> 01:34:40.630 Yeah, we got loads of really enjoyable and interesting emails. 01:34:40.670 --> 01:34:41.410 Thanks a lot for those. 01:34:41.450 --> 01:34:43.071 Thanks to Ollie for coming in once again. 01:34:43.231 --> 01:34:43.791 Thanks Ollie. 01:34:44.351 --> 01:34:46.352 Let's have a little frying pan goodbye from you. 01:34:46.372 --> 01:34:47.893 Oh, he's put it in his bag. 01:34:47.913 --> 01:34:49.113 Forget it, forget it, forget it, forget it. 01:34:51.394 --> 01:34:51.916 There you go. 01:34:51.976 --> 01:34:53.540 Stay tuned for Liz Kershaw. 01:34:53.560 --> 01:34:54.642 We'll see you next week. 01:34:54.662 --> 01:34:55.224 Next week, yeah. 01:34:55.284 --> 01:34:55.645 Take care. 01:34:55.705 --> 01:34:55.885 Bye.