WEBVTT 00:00.009 --> 00:09.433 There you go, that was Blur with Sunday Sunday getting us off to an exciting indie pop style start here on BBC Six Music. 00:09.553 --> 00:10.313 It's the new year. 00:10.393 --> 00:11.474 Happy new year, Joe! 00:11.494 --> 00:12.414 Hey, thanks a lot. 00:12.454 --> 00:12.994 Happy new year. 00:13.034 --> 00:14.295 Happy new year, listeners as well. 00:14.335 --> 00:20.217 I'm just making some notes in my notebook about material that I'm going to be using later in the show. 00:20.377 --> 00:21.778 What kind of material have you got there? 00:21.798 --> 00:22.498 A bit of corduroy? 00:24.119 --> 00:25.340 No written material. 00:25.780 --> 00:26.260 Some gags. 00:26.480 --> 00:27.741 Some routines. 00:27.841 --> 00:28.542 Yeah, good one. 00:28.582 --> 00:32.725 Were you watching the 100... It'll be the first time we've ever used a gag or a routine. 00:33.125 --> 00:34.106 That's true, actually. 00:34.186 --> 00:38.829 Well, I used the gag once, but it went down so badly that I vowed never to do it again. 00:38.849 --> 00:43.652 Were you watching the 100 greatest catchphrases, 50 greatest... How many catchphrases were there? 00:43.672 --> 00:44.253 Three minutes of it. 00:44.753 --> 00:45.134 Three minutes. 00:45.154 --> 00:46.015 Which three minutes did you get? 00:46.055 --> 00:46.755 Which catchphrase? 00:46.775 --> 00:47.176 Porridge. 00:48.457 --> 00:49.539 The one before porridge. 00:49.939 --> 00:50.920 Porridge is all I remember. 00:51.080 --> 00:52.402 What was the catchphrase for porridge? 00:52.442 --> 00:54.284 Somebody explaining the roots of the phrase naff. 00:54.704 --> 00:55.365 Naff? 00:55.626 --> 00:56.266 Yeah, yeah, yeah. 00:56.306 --> 00:57.648 What was the catchphrase from porridge? 00:58.949 --> 00:59.930 You're banged up now. 01:00.291 --> 01:00.871 Something like that. 01:00.892 --> 01:01.172 Get it. 01:02.593 --> 01:05.435 You what would you like it was enough off naff off. 01:05.455 --> 01:09.397 Yeah, right Anyway, we've got great stuff coming up in the show. 01:09.757 --> 01:10.778 Sorry to change the subject. 01:10.798 --> 01:15.520 No quite right We know I only had 49 other catchphrases to talk about but you carry on later. 01:16.021 --> 01:22.244 We've we've got text the nation coming up We've got the return of song wars after it's kind of Christmas confusion. 01:22.684 --> 01:23.745 We did something like 01:24.205 --> 01:28.728 three pre-records for the Christmas period, and some of them are dipped in quality. 01:29.048 --> 01:31.350 So we apologise to any listeners who might have noticed that. 01:31.670 --> 01:33.952 But things are going to be back to their award-winning best. 01:34.532 --> 01:35.713 We haven't actually won the award yet. 01:36.533 --> 01:36.694 No. 01:37.194 --> 01:40.016 But all that to look forward to, and of course, great music coming up. 01:40.436 --> 01:42.418 Folks, you know, this is the place for great music. 01:43.279 --> 01:44.500 And we're gonna play some right now. 01:44.520 --> 01:46.162 This is... You love this one, Joe. 01:46.322 --> 01:47.023 I do like this one. 01:47.063 --> 01:48.204 He's gonna be big this year. 01:48.224 --> 01:50.386 It's a very exciting new talent, ladies and gentlemen. 01:50.546 --> 01:54.030 And who knows what he could achieve by the end of February. 01:54.110 --> 01:56.052 This is Jay-Z with Rock Boys. 01:58.094 --> 02:00.036 Yes, that's very funny, Jay-Z. 02:01.077 --> 02:02.458 No, it's actually silly. 02:02.498 --> 02:03.139 Please don't hurt me. 02:03.803 --> 02:05.705 Uh, that's American gangster music right there. 02:05.806 --> 02:06.546 Hobie's home? 02:07.167 --> 02:07.928 No, Hobie's home. 02:08.108 --> 02:08.509 Hobie? 02:08.569 --> 02:09.150 Hobie City? 02:09.170 --> 02:09.470 Yeah. 02:09.490 --> 02:11.092 Someone's bought the DVDs of Hobie City. 02:11.112 --> 02:11.452 Exactly. 02:11.472 --> 02:12.454 Jay-Z's excited. 02:12.474 --> 02:13.134 He's waving them in. 02:13.154 --> 02:14.095 He's standing there in the doorway. 02:14.236 --> 02:14.876 Hobie's home! 02:14.997 --> 02:16.759 We're gonna watch a lot of Hobie City tonight! 02:16.779 --> 02:17.079 You know what? 02:17.099 --> 02:19.182 You don't even have to get your purses out. 02:19.722 --> 02:20.403 What? 02:20.583 --> 02:22.305 I think he's talking about giving away free rocks. 02:23.025 --> 02:25.287 Oh... That's how he gets everybody buying his rocks. 02:25.327 --> 02:26.749 You know, I got a new purse for Christmas. 02:26.769 --> 02:29.331 I thought you were going to say you got some free rocks for Christmas. 02:29.391 --> 02:30.893 No, I never got no rocks. 02:31.133 --> 02:31.633 That's what I wanted. 02:31.653 --> 02:32.454 Then Christmas crackle. 02:32.654 --> 02:33.575 I wanted some crackling. 02:33.595 --> 02:34.496 Christmas crackling. 02:34.516 --> 02:35.317 No, I didn't get none. 02:35.597 --> 02:36.318 Not a single one. 02:36.698 --> 02:37.919 That's what I wanted, didn't get it. 02:38.240 --> 02:38.880 I got a wallet. 02:38.960 --> 02:39.881 I asked for a wallet. 02:40.221 --> 02:40.442 Is it? 02:40.602 --> 02:43.124 Yeah, and it's... What? 02:43.685 --> 02:43.885 Is it? 02:44.065 --> 02:44.786 What are you saying? 02:44.806 --> 02:45.948 I'm only going for the kids. 02:46.489 --> 02:46.949 Is it? 02:46.969 --> 02:48.392 The kids only understand that kind of thing. 02:48.412 --> 02:48.892 Is that what they say? 02:48.912 --> 02:49.153 Is it? 02:49.173 --> 02:49.393 Yeah. 02:49.714 --> 02:50.174 They don't say that. 02:50.194 --> 02:52.358 We will have attracted some because of that Jay-Z track. 02:52.518 --> 02:53.219 I got a wallet. 02:53.299 --> 02:55.402 Listen, Drew trying to tell... Will you shut up? 02:55.582 --> 02:56.344 What I said was Drew... 02:57.475 --> 02:58.295 What were you going to say? 02:58.436 --> 02:58.876 True say. 02:59.456 --> 03:00.036 True say. 03:00.376 --> 03:01.057 Anyway, keep talking. 03:01.217 --> 03:02.017 Well, there's no point. 03:02.297 --> 03:02.758 There's no point in me. 03:02.778 --> 03:03.718 Go on, I want to hear about the wallet. 03:03.758 --> 03:05.179 No, you don't want to hear about the wallet. 03:05.639 --> 03:08.180 To be honest, how can it be interesting, a wallet? 03:08.521 --> 03:09.581 Well, you'll never know. 03:09.921 --> 03:10.822 Now you'll never know. 03:10.842 --> 03:12.142 Okay? 03:12.863 --> 03:14.163 No, I was going to say I got a wallet, right? 03:14.183 --> 03:16.384 Listen to this. 03:16.825 --> 03:18.866 And it was just not what I wanted. 03:18.886 --> 03:20.647 All right? 03:21.673 --> 03:22.834 There you are, he's right, all along. 03:23.174 --> 03:24.636 Here, tell us about this track you've chosen. 03:25.517 --> 03:26.958 It's by Vampire Weekend. 03:26.978 --> 03:30.741 They're gonna be one of the hot bands to watch for the new year. 03:30.761 --> 03:34.585 You know, do you find that exciting or depressing when people predict what they're gonna be like? 03:34.725 --> 03:36.326 Exciting, optimistic about the new year. 03:36.446 --> 03:37.507 Yeah, very positive. 03:37.667 --> 03:41.311 You like scanning all the... New black president in the US, hopefully. 03:41.551 --> 03:43.333 Either that or a lunatic. 03:43.853 --> 03:44.654 Which one's the lunatic? 03:44.694 --> 03:45.134 Huckabee. 03:46.315 --> 03:46.676 Huckabee. 03:46.736 --> 03:47.496 That's just my opinion. 03:47.636 --> 03:47.757 Yeah. 03:48.357 --> 03:49.138 Uh, so it's exciting. 03:49.519 --> 03:51.161 You know, lots of good new music this year. 03:51.181 --> 03:51.422 Yeah, good. 03:51.882 --> 03:52.323 There's gonna be. 03:52.543 --> 03:54.005 I got a wallet for Christmas. 03:54.166 --> 03:54.867 I don't know if you know that. 03:55.147 --> 03:57.531 But, um, this is Vampire Weekend with A-Punk. 03:57.811 --> 03:58.252 There you go. 03:58.392 --> 04:00.735 That's Vampire Weekend with A-Punk. 04:00.755 --> 04:01.456 What were you saying, Jude? 04:01.496 --> 04:02.698 That it's A-Punk or? 04:02.958 --> 04:03.139 A-Punk. 04:03.459 --> 04:04.540 A-Punk, yeah, that's what I said, isn't it? 04:04.560 --> 04:05.402 Yeah, A-Punk, there you go. 04:05.982 --> 04:09.286 And that's gonna be a hot band for this year, apparently. 04:09.306 --> 04:10.488 It's been predicted, but they're good. 04:10.528 --> 04:12.330 I've listened to some of their stuff and they're excellent. 04:12.850 --> 04:13.471 That's good news. 04:14.032 --> 04:14.332 Yeah, good. 04:14.372 --> 04:17.897 It's good to have good bands be hot rather than bad ones, you know? 04:17.937 --> 04:18.697 Really rotten ones. 04:18.738 --> 04:18.918 Yeah. 04:19.258 --> 04:19.438 I agree. 04:19.498 --> 04:22.561 So coming up quite soon listeners, we're going to be unveiling this week's Song Wars. 04:22.601 --> 04:30.507 We've got no last week's Song Wars to announce the winner of because we took care of that in one of the many complicated extra New Year's Eve shows. 04:31.088 --> 04:34.250 But the theme for this week's Song Wars is ringtones. 04:34.811 --> 04:35.912 Ringtone madness. 04:36.512 --> 04:46.140 It's going to be our attempt to get you guys basically to create a ringtone so powerful that everyone who listens to this show has to have it on their phone. 04:46.360 --> 04:47.782 We're not asking them to create one. 04:48.422 --> 04:49.183 Oh, is that what I said? 04:49.223 --> 04:49.503 Yeah. 04:50.063 --> 04:51.024 Uh, I meant us. 04:51.244 --> 04:55.648 We're gonna create it, but it's gonna be so good that you're all gonna wanna have it on your phones. 04:55.868 --> 04:56.608 Yeah, that's true. 04:56.869 --> 04:59.911 And it's so far, this would be a no-money-making exercise, isn't it? 05:00.011 --> 05:00.211 No. 05:00.612 --> 05:02.533 If there was any money made, it would go to charity. 05:02.833 --> 05:03.093 Right. 05:03.274 --> 05:05.075 But we'll take care of giving it to charity. 05:05.135 --> 05:05.675 Trust us. 05:05.796 --> 05:07.857 Which charity would you give yours to? 05:08.398 --> 05:09.598 Uh, probably Poppy Day. 05:09.959 --> 05:10.599 Poppy Day. 05:10.619 --> 05:11.180 Poppy Day? 05:11.260 --> 05:12.661 Yeah. 05:12.681 --> 05:15.303 Um, mine would be something to do with children. 05:15.703 --> 05:16.024 Really? 05:16.064 --> 05:17.826 Yeah, because I'm poor kids. 05:18.027 --> 05:19.389 I really feel for the children. 05:19.409 --> 05:20.350 Yeah, they're so small. 05:20.370 --> 05:22.573 They can't go on good rollercoasters. 05:22.593 --> 05:23.895 They can't really reach anything. 05:24.175 --> 05:24.416 No. 05:24.796 --> 05:26.859 So that's what I would mainly be. 05:26.939 --> 05:27.721 To extend their arms. 05:27.741 --> 05:30.064 Trying to give them things to clip onto their arms. 05:30.104 --> 05:30.344 Yeah. 05:30.384 --> 05:31.726 With sort of hooks on the end. 05:33.587 --> 05:34.588 So, you know, it's a dream. 05:34.968 --> 05:37.309 And that's coming up very shortly, folks. 05:37.349 --> 05:39.629 In fact, after this, I think we're going to unveil song wars. 05:39.669 --> 05:41.350 But first, we've got a trail for you. 05:41.950 --> 05:43.270 What do you hope for the trail? 05:43.330 --> 05:44.631 What do you hope will be in the trail? 05:44.771 --> 05:47.232 Oh, my hopes for 2008 trails. 05:47.692 --> 05:50.373 I hope there's going to be lots of microphone effects on voices. 05:50.433 --> 05:50.673 Yeah. 05:50.833 --> 05:57.015 You know, in the middle of a sentence, it might go coming up on six music, like just the last two words as if they're through a megaphone. 05:57.135 --> 05:57.775 Yeah. 05:57.875 --> 06:00.916 Some words processed as if they're through a telephone. 06:00.936 --> 06:01.216 Uh-huh. 06:01.976 --> 06:10.379 And hopefully just just clip some exciting music behind them and lots of little clips of people laughing at things Yeah, you don't really know why they've laughed right right here. 06:10.399 --> 06:10.719 We go. 06:10.759 --> 06:11.139 Let's see. 06:11.159 --> 06:14.660 Let's see your economy Oh, there we go. 06:14.700 --> 06:15.420 They did it at the end. 06:15.600 --> 06:25.363 That was pretty solid though Yeah, that was a conventional that was a proper big British castle trailer It was a good trail on that faffing around for the show for a show that would be interesting to you that you like all that stuff Isn't it? 06:25.463 --> 06:28.204 I enjoy them a lot a nice bit of gambling and huffing sounds great 06:28.844 --> 06:31.767 Okay, now it's time for song wars after this next track folks. 06:31.927 --> 06:35.590 This is those dancing days with Hiten. 06:53.214 --> 07:04.800 Thought we'd go with that jingle this time as a little counterpoint to what's bound to be fairly annoying and jarring and Well, you know ringtones are all about sticking in the mind in a very catchy way, aren't they? 07:05.320 --> 07:14.725 Yes, the key is to be really annoying irritating is it mmm Itchy I found but have you ever actually used a ring have you ever downloaded a ringtone and had it on your phone? 07:14.745 --> 07:16.446 Like what's the current ringtone of your phone? 07:16.606 --> 07:18.867 It's just one of the standard one one of the standard one. 07:18.907 --> 07:19.067 Yeah 07:19.207 --> 07:22.030 You never- I put the ones that I did for the show in there, that. 07:22.050 --> 07:22.451 Did you? 07:22.511 --> 07:23.312 Yeah, did you do that? 07:23.572 --> 07:24.233 I thought about it. 07:25.137 --> 07:26.038 And then I decided not to. 07:26.058 --> 07:33.042 Because listening to the stroke customers, I can tell you, you know, I can demonstrate how mine sound on an actual phone. 07:33.262 --> 07:33.422 Yeah. 07:33.442 --> 07:35.424 You know, we'll play them in proper stereophonic first. 07:35.444 --> 07:35.704 Right. 07:35.724 --> 07:40.447 But then for that added, you know, incentive, I can demonstrate how they sound all tinny on the bus. 07:40.987 --> 07:41.187 Yeah. 07:41.207 --> 07:41.968 And they sound good. 07:42.228 --> 07:42.688 Do you know what? 07:42.768 --> 07:45.690 I was going to do that on mine, but I've got an iPhone. 07:46.151 --> 07:46.671 Do you now? 07:46.731 --> 07:47.011 Yeah. 07:47.151 --> 07:48.692 So it would have sounded too good. 07:49.373 --> 07:49.753 Really? 07:49.853 --> 07:50.293 That's true. 07:50.333 --> 07:52.755 They've got like amazingly good speakers, those like 07:53.015 --> 07:53.715 Wicked speakers. 07:53.775 --> 07:54.016 Really? 07:54.096 --> 07:54.856 Yeah, really. 07:54.916 --> 07:55.596 Is that an iPhone? 07:55.616 --> 07:56.277 That's an iPhone. 07:56.457 --> 07:57.317 Wow, look at that. 07:57.357 --> 07:59.499 It's got a leather case there. 07:59.639 --> 08:02.220 I glipped it on. 08:02.920 --> 08:06.983 And it's got a big bit of plastic that I put on the cover to protect it. 08:07.003 --> 08:10.865 Don't you have to pay like £400 a month for that thing? 08:11.645 --> 08:14.727 And can you not only get access to the internet in 5% of the country? 08:15.027 --> 08:16.468 I'm just being negative because I'm jealous. 08:16.608 --> 08:18.009 No, you can get it everywhere. 08:18.029 --> 08:18.529 It's wicked. 08:18.869 --> 08:19.169 Really? 08:19.209 --> 08:20.491 Yeah, it's really wicked. 08:21.051 --> 08:24.594 And I... What was I saying? 08:25.114 --> 08:26.175 What was the other thing you said? 08:26.335 --> 08:27.216 It cost a lot of money. 08:27.256 --> 08:29.338 Oh, yeah, no, no, no, because I was already on there. 08:29.858 --> 08:36.484 Of course, listeners, there are many other phones available and... But no other phones that make you look like such a pants. 08:36.564 --> 08:37.845 Genius, such a genius. 08:37.965 --> 08:39.206 Sorry, I chose the wrong word. 08:39.226 --> 08:39.787 He's very jealous. 08:39.827 --> 08:40.327 Can you hear him? 08:40.367 --> 08:41.909 Jealousy seeping out there. 08:41.929 --> 08:42.990 Anyway, listen, song wars. 08:44.751 --> 08:45.271 ringtones. 08:45.431 --> 08:48.613 Now listen, I heard that you've come in with about nine of them or something. 08:49.173 --> 08:49.553 I did. 08:49.934 --> 08:52.155 Basically, I did some very short ringtones. 08:53.195 --> 08:56.777 And they were only about 20 seconds because I thought they needed to be pithy. 08:57.357 --> 09:00.398 And the more I did them, the kind of better I thought I got at it. 09:00.939 --> 09:09.503 I started out trying to do a kind of a non-hateful ringtone that would be soft and kind of soothing and that you'd like to hear and that was flattering. 09:10.023 --> 09:11.406 But then I realised that was a bit wrong. 09:11.607 --> 09:11.787 Right. 09:11.928 --> 09:16.578 So I went for a more funky one, then I realised that was a bit wrong, and I went for purely irritating. 09:17.039 --> 09:18.703 So are you just doing the sounds? 09:19.645 --> 09:21.465 Like, because, no, mine have got vocals. 09:21.665 --> 09:22.546 You also got vocals. 09:22.566 --> 09:22.786 Yeah. 09:22.826 --> 09:26.306 But you're approaching it more from a sort of Brian Eno startup noise standpoint. 09:26.366 --> 09:28.447 No, no, no, no, no, no. 09:28.767 --> 09:31.747 Because that's, is there not a definite, like, Brian Eno's ill? 09:32.168 --> 09:37.269 There is, is there not a distinction between a ringtone and a sort of alert noise? 09:37.649 --> 09:40.929 Like, because a lot of people now, their ringtone is like a whole song. 09:40.949 --> 09:41.589 Yeah. 09:42.110 --> 09:44.130 So that's what I was assuming that we were going to do. 09:44.230 --> 09:44.510 Cool. 09:45.050 --> 09:47.531 But you brought in three and you're not allowed to bring in three? 09:47.551 --> 09:48.991 That's not fair. 09:49.611 --> 09:50.772 Uh, they're very short ones, though. 09:50.832 --> 09:51.452 Not fair! 09:51.633 --> 09:54.174 Let's hear yours first, and we'll see how many I need to deploy. 09:54.254 --> 09:54.895 I don't think so. 09:54.935 --> 09:55.615 Let's hear yours first. 09:55.655 --> 09:57.637 If you got three, that is gonna be useless. 09:57.697 --> 10:02.721 If I play mine, and then it's just a complete tidal wave of Joe Cornish ringtones, then that is prejudicial. 10:02.741 --> 10:03.241 They're only short. 10:03.381 --> 10:03.921 They're only short. 10:03.981 --> 10:05.262 Okay, I'll play you a teaser. 10:05.903 --> 10:07.564 So play, dude, play number two. 10:08.245 --> 10:09.986 So this is like a, this is a funky one. 10:10.846 --> 10:13.989 Uh, this is like, so imagine your phone going off, and you hear this. 10:14.109 --> 10:14.649 Go, shoot. 10:14.809 --> 10:16.991 Yo, funky mother, it's your telephone ringing. 10:17.051 --> 10:18.472 Time to confiscate, cause somebody's ringing. 10:29.931 --> 10:34.417 So that's quite good, isn't it? 10:34.737 --> 10:36.038 What if they're ringing for longer than that? 10:36.058 --> 10:36.819 It just starts again. 10:36.839 --> 10:37.120 It loops. 10:37.140 --> 10:38.001 Right, right, right. 10:38.061 --> 10:39.282 Which is even more irritating. 10:39.322 --> 10:40.944 Which is even better, I suppose. 10:40.964 --> 10:41.705 So that's quite short. 10:41.725 --> 10:44.809 You see, if I just bought that in, it would have been a little bit insubstantial, I felt. 10:45.089 --> 10:46.209 Well, that was the whole point. 10:46.269 --> 10:50.671 You were the one that lobbied for ringtones, because you said, oh, no, we're going to have to do all that work. 10:50.691 --> 10:51.831 It's going to be New Year. 10:51.891 --> 10:52.572 Let's hear your one. 10:52.612 --> 10:53.972 This is how he operates, listeners. 10:54.012 --> 10:58.334 This is the absolutely dishonest way that Joe Cornish operates these scams. 10:58.374 --> 11:00.594 Let's hear your one. 11:00.714 --> 11:01.055 All right. 11:01.075 --> 11:05.136 Well, this is not fair that you are allowed to play one and then just sandwich the whole thing. 11:05.256 --> 11:06.136 It's a competition. 11:06.156 --> 11:06.616 OK. 11:06.777 --> 11:08.197 And you are not playing by the rules. 11:09.017 --> 11:09.317 All right. 11:09.397 --> 11:10.158 Well, this is mine. 11:10.198 --> 11:13.239 This is like a whole ludicrous thing that's not going to win. 11:15.080 --> 11:18.322 I don't know why I bother, come on. 11:18.562 --> 11:21.824 You got a call coming in, it's exciting. 11:22.085 --> 11:26.828 Perhaps it's from an actor or a model, or maybe Russell Brand. 11:28.869 --> 11:34.413 But more likely, it's from someone at work saying, why ain't you done? 11:34.973 --> 11:35.654 All your work. 11:35.674 --> 11:37.415 Just let it really all go. 11:43.468 --> 11:47.310 Or anyway you could, this ring turned into different answers. 11:47.330 --> 11:51.571 Special endless pitbull all around who haven't heard it before. 11:51.651 --> 11:56.793 You got a call coming in, you got a call coming in. 11:57.534 --> 12:00.615 On your phone in the old days this was enough. 12:01.335 --> 12:08.821 But not now, you've got to have a flipping song to express yourself before you answer your phone. 12:09.301 --> 12:11.042 What's an... That's an odd voice phone. 12:11.623 --> 12:12.824 So that's the song. 12:12.844 --> 12:15.566 You see, you would never hear the end because generally... What accent's that? 12:15.606 --> 12:16.566 That's just an accent. 12:17.047 --> 12:19.609 Generally, the song would cut off after the first... 12:20.850 --> 12:26.694 I don't know how many well people usually answer their phones very quickly But the logic of that one is that people would be so delighted with it. 12:27.114 --> 12:31.838 They would just let it ring They would even switch off their voicemail in order for the song to get to the air. 12:31.858 --> 12:34.760 Yeah, so should we hear your two hundred ones now? 12:35.140 --> 12:41.805 There's only two others and and the third one I wasn't gonna play at all So yeah, why don't we play why don't we hear my other one? 12:41.825 --> 12:44.888 This is the super irritating one All right, you're ready for it. 12:44.928 --> 12:46.669 Yeah Yeah, number one, please 12:48.550 --> 12:53.812 See, this is how it sounds actually, imagine that on the bus. 13:15.285 --> 13:19.147 Well, they're not... Just to take issue with some of the lyrics. 13:19.308 --> 13:20.128 They don't want to. 13:20.148 --> 13:21.649 They are telephoning you. 13:21.669 --> 13:23.690 That's like having someone saw your brain. 13:23.710 --> 13:25.371 They don't want to telephone you. 13:25.632 --> 13:26.912 They are telephoning you. 13:27.032 --> 13:28.133 So I take issue with that. 13:28.193 --> 13:29.034 It just doesn't make any sense. 13:29.054 --> 13:29.714 It makes no sense. 13:30.114 --> 13:30.975 What about the other one? 13:31.455 --> 13:31.976 What, this one? 13:31.996 --> 13:34.377 No, not that one. 13:34.497 --> 13:34.897 Not that one. 13:35.278 --> 13:36.539 I don't think we want to hear the other one. 13:36.639 --> 13:38.740 Well, the other one's even worse than the telephone call one. 13:40.681 --> 13:42.782 No, it's not as irritating, it just goes in a different direction. 13:43.622 --> 13:45.363 What a sexy direction. 13:45.403 --> 13:46.303 Play number three then. 13:46.944 --> 13:48.424 It's not very good, I didn't want to play this one. 13:48.584 --> 13:55.387 Excuse me, I'm sorry to interrupt whatever you're doing. 13:55.887 --> 14:02.770 But you are so popular, your phone goes off the whole time. 14:03.870 --> 14:31.217 With people all desperate To hear your opinions On subjects and matters And invite you round to their houses For parties with ladies The invitations are relentless Sometimes it can be hard to be 14:34.343 --> 14:36.165 You don't want that, what you want is... is this. 14:36.185 --> 14:42.890 Televocal! 14:43.831 --> 14:45.773 Yeah, I've been learning the words, yeah. 14:46.513 --> 14:48.876 Are you gonna nail your colours to the mast, then, Jo? 14:48.936 --> 14:50.297 Are you going with that ringtone? 14:50.317 --> 14:53.700 Can I bundle my ringtones one and two into a kind of twin pack? 14:53.860 --> 14:54.140 No! 14:54.821 --> 14:56.382 And, uh, I can't. 14:56.442 --> 14:58.164 Look, Jo, Jo's laying down the law. 14:58.184 --> 14:58.764 She's laying down the law. 14:58.784 --> 14:59.685 I've got to pick one of them. 15:00.165 --> 15:02.007 I get punished for making extra effort. 15:03.097 --> 15:04.658 Punish with cheating, I think you're fine. 15:04.678 --> 15:06.299 Okay, I tell you which one I'm going for. 15:06.319 --> 15:09.120 This is exciting, isn't it, listen? 15:09.140 --> 15:10.001 This is suspenseful. 15:10.281 --> 15:11.682 Yeah, I'm gonna have a little think. 15:11.702 --> 15:12.822 I think I'll go for this one. 15:12.862 --> 15:13.143 Cheating. 15:14.901 --> 15:15.101 Right. 15:15.561 --> 15:16.322 Right, that's my one. 15:17.002 --> 15:21.223 Okay, well, we'll remind you of the final selection later on, ladies and gentlemen. 15:22.003 --> 15:23.244 Much later on, don't worry. 15:23.364 --> 15:25.284 There'll be quite a significant gap between then. 15:25.445 --> 15:33.347 Hey, and you can vote by texting 64046, text Adam or Joe, or you can email, if you're listening again, adamandjoe.6music at bbc.co.uk. 15:33.727 --> 15:35.088 But now, it's time for the news. 15:35.428 --> 15:36.248 That's good, isn't it? 15:36.268 --> 15:39.109 It's nice to hear the beta band that was outside. 15:39.149 --> 15:41.870 This is Adam and Joe here on BBC 6 Music. 15:42.410 --> 15:50.055 And we were just talking about whether we'd finished watching all the extras on our Blade Runner DVD giant box sets there. 15:50.596 --> 15:52.717 And the answer was no, not quite yet. 15:52.757 --> 15:54.278 There's still quite a lot more to watch. 15:54.698 --> 15:57.440 But I watched some new movies over the Christmas period. 15:57.600 --> 16:00.002 Folks, I imagine that you probably did as well. 16:00.722 --> 16:03.383 Um, didn't enjoy any of them. 16:03.824 --> 16:05.665 I'm just having a look, remembering. 16:06.205 --> 16:11.827 The best one was probably Bee Movie, which I went to see with the children, um, a couple of days ago. 16:12.488 --> 16:15.209 Even though, totally went over their heads, I would think. 16:15.229 --> 16:22.192 I mean, it's just stuff full of things that no child would ever get, plus a load of very, uh, American-centric jokes as well. 16:22.212 --> 16:23.653 Yeah, it's written by Jeremy Seinfeld, though, isn't it? 16:23.693 --> 16:23.873 Yeah, yeah. 16:23.913 --> 16:27.335 So it's gonna be all, um, all sophisticated New York intellectual, isn't it? 16:27.795 --> 16:28.195 Fairly. 16:28.335 --> 16:28.835 But I know what you mean. 16:28.855 --> 16:30.076 That's one of the things that's weird about it. 16:30.216 --> 16:30.296 Yeah. 16:30.316 --> 16:34.381 You know, like fluffy, fluffy bee animal film, but then it's the Seinfeld sensibility. 16:34.401 --> 16:36.203 It's a strange mix, doesn't work for me. 16:36.423 --> 16:37.384 It was very odd. 16:37.404 --> 16:47.316 I mean, basically the central conceit is that more or less the bee, played by Jerry Seinfeld at the centre of the whole thing, the bee protagonist, ends up having a sort of affair with a human being. 16:47.636 --> 16:47.776 Mmm. 16:47.917 --> 16:49.038 No, that can be sexy. 16:49.218 --> 16:50.198 played by Renee Zellweger. 16:50.218 --> 16:51.299 Women and bees. 16:51.479 --> 16:53.999 I've got some mags with that kind of stuff going down at home. 16:54.119 --> 16:54.460 Yeah. 16:55.240 --> 17:00.961 And it's interesting because you have to use a split focus lens for the different depths of field. 17:01.162 --> 17:01.662 Bee filth. 17:02.582 --> 17:04.423 But it is sexy. 17:04.723 --> 17:06.143 It's definitely sexy. 17:06.183 --> 17:09.084 Because at the end... A little sting in the right place. 17:09.204 --> 17:11.805 Well, after the sting, presumably they die. 17:12.165 --> 17:15.466 So that's the ultimate climax to a little act of love. 17:16.546 --> 17:18.589 Anyway, it was still pretty good though. 17:33.484 --> 17:34.025 You haven't seen it. 17:34.205 --> 17:37.207 I've issued a Cornish moratorium on animated animal films. 17:37.467 --> 17:37.888 Oh, really? 17:37.948 --> 17:38.348 No more. 17:38.708 --> 17:39.589 Well, I can't do that. 17:39.669 --> 17:40.350 I've got a family. 17:40.370 --> 17:40.910 This is no question. 17:40.930 --> 17:42.632 If you were doing that, I'd be in terrible trouble. 17:43.432 --> 17:45.674 I also went to see I Am Legend. 17:46.094 --> 17:46.715 I Am Leg End. 17:47.115 --> 17:49.017 Here's another name for I Am Legend. 17:49.117 --> 17:49.277 Hey. 17:49.517 --> 17:51.679 I Am Useless. 17:51.699 --> 17:51.799 Hey. 17:51.859 --> 17:53.921 Now, some people out there won't have seen I Am Leg End. 17:54.081 --> 17:54.361 Don't. 17:55.642 --> 17:57.223 It's good for an hour. 17:57.244 --> 18:03.809 I tell you what, if you really want to see it, save your money, come round to my house, I'll smack you in the face for four hours. 18:03.829 --> 18:08.392 I've got a lot to say about I Am Leggen, but I can't really say it because people get upset about spoilers. 18:08.652 --> 18:12.235 Most of the outrageous things about I Am Leggen happen in the last 45 minutes. 18:12.255 --> 18:13.496 It's torture. 18:13.536 --> 18:14.597 It kind of eats itself. 18:14.677 --> 18:18.680 It starts out being brilliant, but then completely shoots itself in the smith. 18:18.740 --> 18:21.362 I don't know about it being brilliant at any stage. 18:21.602 --> 18:22.403 I thought it had a very 18:23.203 --> 18:24.464 Here's the premise, listeners. 18:25.184 --> 18:28.165 The film starts, and here's Will Smith. 18:28.366 --> 18:30.887 He's driving around a deserted New York City. 18:30.907 --> 18:33.108 It's a bit like the beginning of 28 Days Later. 18:33.888 --> 18:36.749 And I believe they shot it in similar circumstances. 18:36.809 --> 18:38.650 Yeah, they shot it in London that morning. 18:38.670 --> 18:39.010 Yeah, right. 18:39.671 --> 18:42.952 But early in the morning in New York City, they shot a lot of the stuff, apparently. 18:43.332 --> 18:51.896 When the streets were all deserted, and they ran out there and messed it all up and made it look as if they'd been a big plague that had wiped out the population of the earth. 18:52.376 --> 18:56.637 And Will Smith is the only man left and he's still in New York City and he's trying to find a cure. 18:57.918 --> 19:06.080 In the meantime he sort of amuses himself by driving around shooting deer and antelope and stuff that have escaped from the zoo presumably and are roaming the streets free. 19:06.460 --> 19:08.941 But here's the thing, in the evening when the sun goes down 19:09.421 --> 19:13.404 the kind of survivor zombie population of New York City comes out. 19:13.424 --> 19:14.285 The dark seekers. 19:14.345 --> 19:16.246 The dark seekers, that's what they're called. 19:16.586 --> 19:20.850 And they've got the worst, stupidest CG faces. 19:21.290 --> 19:24.693 It did make me think, who named them dark seekers? 19:24.873 --> 19:27.775 And at what stage in the disaster was that name coined? 19:27.855 --> 19:28.155 Right. 19:28.175 --> 19:33.599 Do you know, because you'd be less likely to call them that than, oh, those awful people. 19:33.859 --> 19:34.420 Yeah. 19:34.620 --> 19:35.360 The ill people. 19:35.821 --> 19:36.121 Yeah. 19:36.201 --> 19:37.182 The very ill people. 19:37.502 --> 19:38.383 Or the computer men. 19:38.923 --> 19:40.424 Exactly, which is what they are. 19:40.544 --> 19:41.985 I mean, they're a total disgrace. 19:42.445 --> 19:48.609 Presumably, they're computer men so that they can move incredibly fast, right, in a sort of weird, slightly scary way. 19:49.130 --> 19:56.214 But what's wrong with... could they not just, uh, have close-ups with people in prosthetics and stuff and do a bit of old-fashioned makeup? 19:56.634 --> 20:00.457 That would have been better than the stupid faces they've got on there with the computerized faces. 20:00.777 --> 20:01.317 I liked it. 20:01.658 --> 20:02.278 Did you really? 20:02.358 --> 20:03.259 Yeah, I didn't mind that. 20:03.539 --> 20:05.220 I just didn't like the god-bothering aspects of it. 20:05.520 --> 20:05.720 Oh, yeah. 20:05.760 --> 20:06.941 It turns into a Christian film at the end. 20:07.021 --> 20:11.124 No insult to Christians, but, you know, it's all over that film in a weird way. 20:11.604 --> 20:12.065 But listen to it. 20:12.085 --> 20:13.085 Should we have a bit of music? 20:13.346 --> 20:14.586 Yeah, yeah, yeah. 20:14.706 --> 20:18.149 Here is Adele, ladies and gentlemen, and this is Chasing Pavements. 20:18.409 --> 20:19.249 Oh, that's nice, isn't it? 20:19.269 --> 20:19.850 That was Adele. 20:19.870 --> 20:20.590 That was like us. 20:21.031 --> 20:22.432 That was like my mum. 20:23.908 --> 20:24.028 What? 20:24.048 --> 20:24.328 Singing? 20:24.788 --> 20:27.609 No, it's just that he'll have my mum, reminds me of my mum. 20:27.869 --> 20:35.632 No, I was going to say, it's like, it's like your mother coming and laying a warm towelette on your face and then pushing it. 20:35.652 --> 20:38.573 You're going to say something else though, I'm glad that sentence ended with towelette. 20:38.753 --> 20:43.515 Pushing it into your face and until you can't breathe, take it off, take it off! 20:43.755 --> 20:44.916 God, that explains a lot. 20:45.436 --> 20:46.037 Oh, that was lovely. 20:46.077 --> 20:47.137 A deal with chasing pavements. 20:47.157 --> 20:48.318 What does that mean, chasing pavements? 20:48.338 --> 20:49.939 That's like falling over face first. 20:50.700 --> 20:52.781 Outside of clapping visuals, maybe. 20:53.242 --> 21:00.067 Chasing pavements, unless she's really, really on drugs and it seems like the pavements are kind of getting away from her. 21:00.867 --> 21:01.888 That's not, it couldn't be that. 21:02.188 --> 21:03.269 Is it text the nation time? 21:03.549 --> 21:05.450 It got to be text the nation time, surely. 21:06.351 --> 21:07.412 Nation's favourite feature. 21:12.348 --> 21:13.311 What if I don't want to? 21:13.552 --> 21:15.417 But I'm using email. 21:15.578 --> 21:16.259 Is that a problem? 21:19.861 --> 21:21.382 So, it's time for Text the Nation. 21:21.402 --> 21:28.889 This is the part of the show, and listen carefully, because this is quite complicated, where you text us on a kind of a theme, or you can email. 21:29.389 --> 21:31.871 Yeah, if you're listening, fire Listen Again, you can email. 21:32.032 --> 21:34.694 Email is adamandshow.6musicatbbc.co.uk. 21:34.994 --> 21:36.856 The text is 64046. 21:37.476 --> 21:38.597 Text the Nation this week. 21:38.937 --> 21:39.998 Are we going to do this one? 21:40.158 --> 21:40.439 Do you think? 21:40.899 --> 21:41.259 Why not? 21:41.299 --> 21:41.500 Yeah. 21:41.600 --> 21:41.940 Why not? 21:42.020 --> 21:42.340 Okay. 21:42.380 --> 21:43.741 If it goes wrong, we can do something else. 21:43.821 --> 21:44.862 It's just a simple one. 21:45.383 --> 21:53.890 Do you ever, when you see a famous actor or actress come on telly, you know, one of the ones that's in lots of things, they pop up all the time, do you ever invent silly names for them? 21:54.090 --> 21:55.631 Right, give us parallel names for them. 21:55.671 --> 21:59.054 Like, I was watching a terrible, terrible film called Balls of Fury. 21:59.494 --> 22:00.015 Oh yeah. 22:00.035 --> 22:00.995 The other day, no good. 22:01.976 --> 22:03.758 And it had Christopher Walken in it. 22:03.858 --> 22:04.018 Yeah. 22:04.218 --> 22:05.940 I like to call him Christopher Walk-on. 22:06.260 --> 22:06.560 Nice. 22:06.580 --> 22:08.282 Because he has so many Walk-on parts. 22:08.362 --> 22:08.582 Yeah. 22:09.182 --> 22:10.844 I say, look, there's Christopher Walk-on. 22:11.204 --> 22:12.345 Or might expect people to laugh. 22:12.645 --> 22:12.946 Right. 22:13.586 --> 22:14.607 In a kind of a dad way. 22:14.707 --> 22:15.728 Exactly, exactly. 22:15.788 --> 22:18.190 Or if you didn't like him, you could call him Christopher Walk-off. 22:18.751 --> 22:18.991 Yeah. 22:19.011 --> 22:19.431 I wish. 22:19.692 --> 22:24.055 Well, I like to call the conservative leader James Cameron James Cameron on. 22:24.696 --> 22:24.816 Oh. 22:24.856 --> 22:27.679 Because he's only, you know, he only behaves in that way when the cameras come on. 22:27.919 --> 22:29.220 James Cameron on. 22:29.260 --> 22:30.021 James Cameron off. 22:30.741 --> 22:33.442 And I get some very loving looks in my house when I say that. 22:33.582 --> 22:33.863 Good. 22:33.883 --> 22:34.663 Joe, you're so funny. 22:34.783 --> 22:35.383 You are funny. 22:35.743 --> 22:37.724 When Josh Hartnett comes on the screen. 22:37.744 --> 22:38.245 What have you got? 22:38.265 --> 22:40.346 I like to say, look, Josh Hernett. 22:40.606 --> 22:40.946 Nice. 22:41.266 --> 22:41.506 Yeah. 22:41.606 --> 22:43.287 Because that'll teach him a lesson. 22:43.327 --> 22:43.887 He's so vain. 22:44.047 --> 22:44.788 He's so vain. 22:44.868 --> 22:45.548 He's a pretty boy. 22:46.288 --> 22:48.009 He probably does wear a hair net. 22:48.109 --> 22:52.091 He's probably got one stuffed in his pockets or maybe down the front of his trousers. 22:52.191 --> 22:55.353 When Harrison Ford comes on, I like to call him Harrison Board. 22:55.493 --> 22:55.933 Oh, why? 22:56.213 --> 22:57.754 Because he looks so bored all the time. 22:57.774 --> 22:58.234 He looks so bored. 22:58.534 --> 22:59.835 That's one of the things about him. 22:59.875 --> 23:00.956 Have you got any of these, Adam? 23:01.056 --> 23:03.498 No, because you just told me it's five seconds ago. 23:03.838 --> 23:04.899 This is what we were gonna do. 23:05.359 --> 23:06.700 Think of someone during the next record. 23:06.720 --> 23:07.161 Okay, I will. 23:07.261 --> 23:07.501 Yeah. 23:08.021 --> 23:08.622 Cake blanket? 23:09.282 --> 23:09.963 What do you call her? 23:10.163 --> 23:11.004 Cake blanket. 23:11.284 --> 23:11.524 Nice. 23:11.624 --> 23:12.705 I call her cake blanket. 23:12.945 --> 23:13.846 Cake blanket. 23:13.906 --> 23:15.047 That's taking it one further. 23:15.107 --> 23:15.847 I don't know what it means. 23:15.907 --> 23:17.669 It bears no relation to it. 23:17.689 --> 23:27.116 We're not expecting, as you can see, any genuine wit in this, but, you know, I think this is a habit that a lot of people have, and we'd like to hear, you know, some of the ones that you guys come up with. 23:27.196 --> 23:31.258 I would imagine Amy Winehouse is a popular one, there's got to be loads of variations for that. 23:31.298 --> 23:31.518 Yeah. 23:32.058 --> 23:42.263 This is a kind of, maybe young people don't do this so much, but as you get older it starts becoming, I think there's some sort of little bit of the brain that starts growing and just gets cynical about everything and you know what I mean? 23:42.303 --> 23:44.704 Well it's, we were talking about this last year at some point, weren't we? 23:45.004 --> 23:45.904 It's a very dad thing to do. 23:45.924 --> 23:50.526 It's the sort of thing your dad might just walk into the room while you're watching telling him, huh, Josh Hermit. 23:50.546 --> 23:50.986 Yeah. 23:51.006 --> 23:53.528 My dad used to come and, oh, Angelo Ripoff. 23:54.848 --> 23:56.069 Oh look, it's Angela Ripoff! 23:56.129 --> 24:09.757 I've talked about that before, but so do text us in with your kind of, what would you call them, like, you know, mutated celebrity names that manage to kind of coax something more, something meaningful out of it, you know what I mean? 24:09.777 --> 24:11.057 Some added truth. 24:11.317 --> 24:12.798 Yeah, text 64046. 24:13.259 --> 24:20.703 We've also got quite a lot of emails about the thing we were doing on one of our pre-records, which is a kind of a placebo textination about the Bourne 24:21.543 --> 24:22.803 Ah, supremacy, identity. 24:22.823 --> 24:23.503 Yes, yes. 24:24.884 --> 24:25.564 Give me... What is it? 24:25.924 --> 24:26.604 It's the ultimatum. 24:26.684 --> 24:27.264 Ultimatum. 24:27.304 --> 24:27.844 No, is it? 24:27.944 --> 24:28.445 Yeah, yeah, yeah. 24:28.705 --> 24:29.025 Yeah. 24:29.225 --> 24:29.425 No. 24:29.805 --> 24:30.765 That was one of the first ones. 24:30.785 --> 24:32.686 The final one is called the born ultimatum. 24:33.246 --> 24:37.627 And we were going through on our pre-record some of the stupid things they say to each other in the control room. 24:37.647 --> 24:38.287 Give me eyes. 24:38.627 --> 24:41.768 I need eyes on the... What's he called? 24:41.808 --> 24:42.288 The asset. 24:42.468 --> 24:43.568 Give me eyes on the asset. 24:43.808 --> 24:44.928 Give me a tic-tac-toe. 24:45.909 --> 24:46.849 And that sort of stuff. 24:46.889 --> 24:47.049 Yeah. 24:48.089 --> 24:48.810 Can't find it. 24:48.890 --> 24:49.390 Here we go. 24:50.111 --> 24:51.252 I got it down here somewhere. 24:51.632 --> 24:55.436 That was anyway, but so there are some of those to go through, but maybe we'll do those after the next record. 24:55.456 --> 24:56.536 We got some great emails about that. 24:57.277 --> 24:59.099 So this one is one of your choices, I think, Joe. 24:59.119 --> 25:01.741 Yeah, this is a Tribe Called Quest with a track called Excursions. 25:02.041 --> 25:03.763 Gregory Isaacs with Permanent Lover. 25:03.843 --> 25:08.347 That was recorded for John Peel, one of the Peel Sessions on Radio 1 on the 26th of October 1981. 25:09.128 --> 25:14.773 I had a bit of a kind of a soft reggae thing going over Christmas, personally. 25:15.673 --> 25:20.598 Mmm, I bought that album, I got given that album that's compiled by the Super Furry Animals bassist. 25:20.678 --> 25:21.919 It's called Furry Selection. 25:22.380 --> 25:27.444 And it's a fantastic compilation of kind of, you know, really good dub reggae. 25:27.705 --> 25:29.586 To have a bit of Lovers Rock in there as well. 25:29.607 --> 25:30.227 Yeah, yeah. 25:30.267 --> 25:35.012 I'll be playing one of the tracks from it a little later in the show, so there's something to listen out for. 25:35.212 --> 25:37.374 You went to see the Super Furrys on New Year's Eve, right? 25:37.634 --> 25:39.055 I did, yeah, at the Royal Festival Hall. 25:39.215 --> 25:39.495 How was that? 25:39.515 --> 25:40.175 It was quite good. 25:40.235 --> 25:40.415 Yeah. 25:40.616 --> 25:41.416 They were very good. 25:41.716 --> 25:45.098 The event as a whole left a couple of things to be desired, I'd say. 25:45.158 --> 25:46.178 Well, New Year's Eve, eh? 25:46.239 --> 25:47.099 It's always a nightmare. 25:47.239 --> 25:48.680 Yeah, that's a slightly odd atmosphere. 25:48.760 --> 25:50.321 And it was in the foyer. 25:50.341 --> 25:51.161 Wow. 25:51.241 --> 25:57.765 And there was just a kind of, you know, an unforgettable atmosphere of foyer-ness about it. 25:57.825 --> 25:58.045 Right. 25:58.305 --> 25:58.785 Do you know what I mean? 25:58.805 --> 26:00.066 When you do an event in a foyer, 26:00.686 --> 26:02.667 The whole thing just stinks slightly of foyer. 26:02.747 --> 26:07.088 It's a little bit dissipated, everyone's- Dissipated, people wandering around- Well it's a thoroughfare, isn't it? 26:07.108 --> 26:07.508 Exactly, exactly. 26:07.528 --> 26:09.128 It's actually at the royal festival hall. 26:09.168 --> 26:14.530 It lacked a sense of, you know, of, uh, you know, I can't think of words this morning, will that be a problem? 26:14.770 --> 26:19.111 No, listen man, I know where you're at, it's difficult, because technically we've been away for a few weeks. 26:19.511 --> 26:30.641 So listen, the other week we did a pre-record where we were doing a kind of simulated text donation, we were asking you to suggest phrases that could be used in one of the born identity films in the control room. 26:31.382 --> 26:38.769 In the actual film, they say stuff like, we went in for a sneak and peek, which means they broke in and searched the flat, they say stuff like, 26:39.489 --> 26:45.492 Get me a tic-tac-toe, which is kind of special speak for elevations of a building. 26:45.652 --> 26:46.032 Plans. 26:46.332 --> 26:46.833 Floor plan. 26:46.953 --> 26:47.833 Activate the asset. 26:48.433 --> 26:48.754 Asset. 26:48.974 --> 26:49.754 Activate the asset. 26:49.894 --> 26:50.795 Cross deviation. 26:51.075 --> 26:51.995 Release the funds. 26:52.555 --> 26:53.176 That sort of thing. 26:53.216 --> 26:55.497 So people have sent in some quite good suggestions here. 26:55.517 --> 26:56.057 Do you want to hear some? 26:56.137 --> 26:57.378 Yeah, go on then. 26:57.938 --> 26:58.278 Here's one. 26:58.398 --> 26:59.259 Let's consult the owl. 26:59.799 --> 27:00.079 Right. 27:00.279 --> 27:01.000 Consult the owl. 27:01.900 --> 27:02.902 Yeah, this is from Jason. 27:03.082 --> 27:07.348 This means we should run the plan past a wise, experienced, intelligent officer. 27:07.448 --> 27:08.330 Very good, Jason. 27:08.350 --> 27:08.530 Yeah. 27:08.891 --> 27:09.511 This is one I like a lot. 27:09.532 --> 27:10.773 Maybe that was from Jason Pawn. 27:11.054 --> 27:12.937 Maybe that, yeah, yeah, that's true! 27:13.960 --> 27:14.581 Here's a good one. 27:14.941 --> 27:15.561 Dust and polish. 27:15.842 --> 27:16.622 Dust and polish? 27:16.662 --> 27:17.323 Dust and polish. 27:17.343 --> 27:18.043 Yeah, that's good. 27:18.204 --> 27:22.727 What is completed following a property search to remove any trace of entry? 27:23.027 --> 27:23.908 Dust and polish. 27:23.948 --> 27:25.129 I bet either cops actually say that. 27:25.149 --> 27:26.030 That's probably real, isn't it? 27:26.050 --> 27:26.991 Maybe he's a cop. 27:27.031 --> 27:27.811 He probably is a cop. 27:27.831 --> 27:28.792 He's letting out secrets. 27:29.613 --> 27:31.514 This is from Akio. 27:31.774 --> 27:33.556 Apologise if I haven't said your name correctly. 27:33.796 --> 27:34.837 The chicken is in the oven. 27:35.197 --> 27:35.618 Mm-hmm. 27:35.758 --> 27:36.478 That's good, isn't it? 27:36.578 --> 27:36.698 Yeah. 27:36.718 --> 27:37.379 What would that mean? 27:37.619 --> 27:42.683 That just means that it's almost dinner time, the chicken's gonna be cooked fairly soon, and they're gonna eat some chips. 27:42.703 --> 27:44.404 Right, so that's if they're gonna have chicken. 27:44.465 --> 27:44.905 Exactly. 27:44.925 --> 27:45.065 Yeah. 27:45.225 --> 27:47.187 What about if someone goes, turn down the music? 27:48.087 --> 27:48.248 Yeah. 27:48.328 --> 27:48.988 Turn down the music. 27:49.428 --> 27:51.010 That would just mean turn your volume down. 27:51.030 --> 27:51.310 Exactly. 27:51.330 --> 27:52.051 It's a little bit loud. 27:52.111 --> 27:53.272 It's very hard for everyone to concentrate. 27:53.292 --> 27:53.372 Yeah. 27:53.392 --> 27:53.872 Here's a good one. 27:54.092 --> 27:56.034 Dust the shelves and replace the ornaments. 27:57.295 --> 27:59.336 Dust the shelves and replace the ornaments. 28:00.477 --> 28:01.318 The kettle is boiled. 28:01.358 --> 28:02.299 We are out of milk. 28:03.069 --> 28:03.489 That's a good one. 28:03.509 --> 28:05.290 The freezer is in critical need of defrosting. 28:06.071 --> 28:06.331 Yeah. 28:06.851 --> 28:08.633 Somebody's left the freezer door open. 28:11.014 --> 28:13.376 Someone's suggesting put the doggy in the basket. 28:14.016 --> 28:15.097 That's a different one, isn't it? 28:15.177 --> 28:18.219 From Silence of the Lambs. 28:18.619 --> 28:20.880 Finally, we got an email from a guy called Richard Oldham. 28:21.261 --> 28:28.786 He says, as a way of exciting our boring office life, my colleagues and I have taken to renaming everyday office items with overtly masculine names, e.g. 28:28.886 --> 28:30.827 the stapler has become magnum. 28:31.607 --> 28:33.768 And the staple remover has become Cobra. 28:34.388 --> 28:47.431 Recently we've taken to using this to create born ultimatum control room phrases, so instead of saying, oops Daisy, I've been stamping too many pages together, we say, uh, rookie's gone rogue with a magnum and I need the Cobra to clean up the mess. 28:48.752 --> 28:49.392 That's Richard. 28:49.752 --> 28:52.873 In Bermuda, designing houses for filthy rich people. 28:53.073 --> 28:53.493 No. 28:53.533 --> 28:54.173 What a job. 28:54.533 --> 28:56.194 Man, Richard, can we come and help you, Richard? 28:57.341 --> 28:58.581 Yeah, please, can we go out there? 28:58.601 --> 28:59.081 That'd be great. 28:59.162 --> 29:03.343 My dad is a little bit confused by The Bourne Ultimate and we watched it as our Christmas movie this year. 29:03.703 --> 29:06.463 We had it on DVD and we projected it with the surround sound. 29:06.704 --> 29:06.944 Nice. 29:07.064 --> 29:08.284 Oh man, it was exciting. 29:08.324 --> 29:11.465 My mum had never seen it before and she was digging it, but my dad couldn't. 29:11.505 --> 29:14.886 He kept on leaning over going, what, what is going on? 29:15.346 --> 29:16.046 Who is he? 29:16.346 --> 29:22.708 So I had to explain this and that and then every now and again he would turn around to me and say, so what is asset doing now? 29:25.550 --> 29:27.131 Oh, if only his name was Asset. 29:27.351 --> 29:27.511 Yeah. 29:27.731 --> 29:31.434 Like, I wish that Christian Bale's character in Rescue Dawn was called Dawn. 29:32.034 --> 29:33.976 It would improve the film massively for me. 29:35.397 --> 29:36.177 It certainly would. 29:36.517 --> 29:37.498 Do we have some more music? 29:38.039 --> 29:38.899 Is it more music time? 29:39.359 --> 29:39.840 I think so. 29:40.360 --> 29:41.901 And it's the Wombarts. 29:42.542 --> 29:43.122 With BBC. 29:49.096 --> 29:54.678 On Digital Online BBC Six Music What an exciting sound! 29:54.938 --> 30:05.961 The sound of young people getting excited about life, making love to one another, drinking too much wine, locking themselves in hot rooms with instruments until they don't know what's what or who's where. 30:06.021 --> 30:08.782 Pushing things off desks and refusing them to pick them up. 30:08.982 --> 30:09.542 Refusing them? 30:10.043 --> 30:10.643 To pick them up. 30:11.738 --> 30:14.861 the electricity that sparks between young people with freshly washed hair. 30:32.395 --> 30:37.837 Three was forgetting to write the correct year on the top of checks, like writing the previous year. 30:39.037 --> 30:42.518 And tax, obviously, is another depressing thing. 30:43.278 --> 30:47.720 Pretty much as soon as your present wrapping paper is in the bin, you get the tax bill. 30:47.800 --> 30:49.500 And the recycling books, I hope. 30:49.820 --> 30:50.781 Yeah, of course, absolutely. 30:50.801 --> 30:52.821 Did a lot of recycling this Christmas. 30:53.261 --> 30:54.922 And what's the other depressing thing? 30:54.942 --> 31:00.984 I don't know, you just, you know, it's just a whole new raft of things, isn't it, to deal with? 31:01.964 --> 31:02.485 A new year. 31:03.025 --> 31:04.026 That's one way of looking at it. 31:04.066 --> 31:05.567 Yes, I've got another raft. 31:06.607 --> 31:08.389 While up with things. 31:08.769 --> 31:10.830 So listen, we're in the middle of... Eventually they'll stop coming. 31:11.351 --> 31:11.751 What, the raft? 31:11.791 --> 31:12.892 And it'll just be the void. 31:13.292 --> 31:13.852 I know, that's true. 31:13.872 --> 31:14.733 See, you always look forward to that. 31:14.873 --> 31:15.394 That's true. 31:15.694 --> 31:17.835 Yeah, sweet, sweet void. 31:18.636 --> 31:23.059 But before that, before the void, I think it's time we checked in with Texas Nation. 31:28.069 --> 31:30.012 What if I don't want to? 31:30.112 --> 31:31.134 But I'm using email. 31:31.294 --> 31:31.975 Is that a problem? 31:35.365 --> 31:44.632 Yes, it's text the nation time, and this week we're asking you to text in sort of stupid mangleings of celebrities' names that make you happy to say when you see the celebrity. 31:44.832 --> 31:49.856 It gives you a little bit of power against their world-dominating, uh, everywhere-ness. 31:50.536 --> 31:51.437 Yeah, perhaps. 31:52.198 --> 31:57.822 Uh, examples being... My girlfriend's mum calls certain stars Ray the Otter. 31:57.842 --> 31:59.823 That's a very common one for Ray Lee Otter. 32:00.504 --> 32:03.046 But then she carries on to John the Vulture. 32:03.746 --> 32:04.647 What's John the Vulture? 32:04.667 --> 32:05.467 John Travolta. 32:05.527 --> 32:06.188 John Travolta. 32:06.208 --> 32:06.908 That's a bit left field. 32:07.308 --> 32:08.609 And Stephen Seagull. 32:09.049 --> 32:09.810 Stephen Seagull's fine. 32:09.830 --> 32:10.670 That's quite a good one. 32:10.710 --> 32:12.271 I think this is because she likes animals. 32:12.311 --> 32:14.112 She's got two dogs, says Gus. 32:14.793 --> 32:18.855 She goes for John the Vulture over just the simpler John Revolting, which is what most people call it. 32:18.875 --> 32:19.496 Yeah, but they're good. 32:20.136 --> 32:21.917 John the Vulture is quite idiosyncratic. 32:21.957 --> 32:23.778 It's quite, you know, mummy-ish, isn't it? 32:23.858 --> 32:24.839 It's not that much to do. 32:25.039 --> 32:29.562 The funniest joke in Bee Movie is flying a plane. 32:29.602 --> 32:30.322 How hard can it be? 32:30.382 --> 32:31.403 John Travolta can do it. 32:32.123 --> 32:32.703 Something like that. 32:32.823 --> 32:33.784 I slightly mangled it. 32:34.304 --> 32:35.124 It's funnier in the film. 32:35.164 --> 32:36.044 Doesn't sound promising. 32:37.305 --> 32:39.085 I always call Eric Clapton. 32:39.225 --> 32:40.126 Here's a good dad one. 32:40.326 --> 32:41.366 Eric clapped out. 32:41.646 --> 32:41.966 Nice. 32:42.266 --> 32:42.646 Yeah. 32:43.206 --> 32:45.567 Ha ha ha or not, says Nicola in Glasgow. 32:45.867 --> 32:48.228 Bill Oddy, Odd Billy from Dave in the Highlands. 32:48.728 --> 32:49.168 That's good. 32:50.149 --> 32:54.150 What about for Bruce Forsyth, Bruce Forkknife? 32:55.110 --> 32:55.751 That's strange. 32:55.771 --> 32:56.531 That's quite good, isn't it? 32:56.551 --> 32:57.452 He's just made that one up, hasn't he? 32:57.472 --> 32:58.513 He's got a slash in between. 32:58.713 --> 33:00.614 Bruce Fork slash Knife. 33:00.915 --> 33:02.276 That's from Andy in Birmingham. 33:02.296 --> 33:03.096 Bruce Fork Knife. 33:04.197 --> 33:05.158 That's quite good, I think. 33:05.258 --> 33:07.099 I'd be happy saying that whenever I saw him. 33:07.360 --> 33:08.520 What did they used to call him there? 33:08.540 --> 33:15.326 It was something like Bruce... false... false tights. 33:15.666 --> 33:16.086 I don't know. 33:16.326 --> 33:17.247 Have a think about that one. 33:17.867 --> 33:19.789 Obviously there's a load that you couldn't say on 33:20.049 --> 33:22.270 Mo in Aberdeen has a good one for Keira Knightley. 33:22.730 --> 33:23.730 IKEA Knightley. 33:23.770 --> 33:24.050 Nice. 33:24.370 --> 33:25.451 Yeah, that's what she's like. 33:25.471 --> 33:25.911 Nearly works. 33:26.411 --> 33:27.451 It's nearly an anagram. 33:28.311 --> 33:31.092 And she turns Amy Winehouse into Amy Wine Lake. 33:31.472 --> 33:31.892 Nice. 33:31.973 --> 33:34.853 Yeah, because she drinks a lot and she's got difficulties. 33:34.873 --> 33:35.434 An awful lot. 33:35.454 --> 33:39.235 Because of it, uh, Panda Wolf in East Coat. 33:39.755 --> 33:40.655 What a bizarre name. 33:41.375 --> 33:42.736 Uh, calls Whoopi Goldberg. 33:42.776 --> 33:43.356 Wait for it. 33:43.376 --> 33:43.716 Hmm. 33:44.176 --> 33:45.518 Whoopi Goldfish! 33:45.798 --> 33:46.558 Goldfish! 33:46.839 --> 33:52.644 Yeah, my friend's got a joke that goes, did you know that Gerard Depardier is marrying Whoopi Goldberg? 33:53.345 --> 33:55.107 Yeah, she's gonna be called Whoopi Doopi Doo. 33:55.127 --> 33:57.729 That's quite a good joke. 33:58.610 --> 33:58.970 Anybody? 33:58.990 --> 33:59.090 Hello? 33:59.110 --> 34:00.171 That is good, that is good. 34:00.452 --> 34:01.953 I was just, my brain was processing it. 34:02.173 --> 34:09.660 My dad calls the Toyota Prius, hang on a second, my dad calls Toyota Prius drivers, Toyota Pius. 34:10.521 --> 34:13.523 Yeah, because of their smug, self-righteous choice of car. 34:14.104 --> 34:18.707 He also calls Natasha Kaplinsky, Natasha Lipstick-sky. 34:20.309 --> 34:21.029 Lipstick-sky. 34:21.149 --> 34:22.570 From Jenny Lipstick-sky. 34:23.651 --> 34:23.971 Yeah. 34:24.692 --> 34:31.357 Uh, Tom in Bournemouth says, you know, they're not supposed to be funny-funny, but they're just strange and they're like little family secrets. 34:31.377 --> 34:31.837 Just words? 34:32.198 --> 34:35.500 We like to call Amy Winehouse, Amy Hairhouse. 34:36.281 --> 34:37.502 Because of her hair. 34:40.137 --> 34:45.306 I'd call a like Amy Amy face house. 34:45.346 --> 34:49.192 Yeah, you know, I know I call her Amy tattoo has 34:50.964 --> 34:51.845 Because she's got tattoo. 34:51.865 --> 34:52.345 That's good. 34:52.406 --> 34:53.006 That's good. 34:53.347 --> 34:54.027 That is good. 34:54.748 --> 34:55.088 House. 34:55.829 --> 34:56.090 What? 34:56.210 --> 34:57.651 Amy Tattoo Hair's house. 34:58.032 --> 34:59.593 Because then it sounds like her name. 34:59.653 --> 35:01.615 I just thought at the end there, I just popped it in. 35:01.876 --> 35:02.136 Yeah. 35:02.476 --> 35:02.737 Yeah. 35:03.558 --> 35:04.979 Yeah, I'm just looking through the rest of these. 35:05.520 --> 35:07.582 You know, I might have to vet these a little bit. 35:07.962 --> 35:11.566 Pete, drink, drugs, tea. 35:12.207 --> 35:12.707 That's good. 35:13.408 --> 35:14.328 Write some of those down. 35:14.829 --> 35:16.009 We'll come back to that. 35:16.069 --> 35:25.153 Keep them coming in at AdamandJoe.6musicatbbc.co.uk or text 64046 if you've got any kind of clever ones. 35:25.873 --> 35:27.114 Sounds unlikely but you know. 35:27.474 --> 35:30.515 Hey it's our first show back in the new year folks, come on. 35:30.655 --> 35:32.416 You know, colour some slack will you please. 35:32.936 --> 35:35.117 Now here's a choice that I made for you listeners. 35:35.157 --> 35:36.178 Hope you enjoyed this one. 35:36.558 --> 35:38.599 I don't hear too much Frank Zapper on the radio. 35:39.319 --> 35:44.380 uh, possibly because a lot of the stuff in his songs is sort of filthy and um, profane. 35:44.720 --> 35:46.581 He writes a lot of songs about sex and stuff. 35:47.321 --> 35:50.382 Um, even though that was, that was his big vice-apper, wasn't it? 35:50.422 --> 35:52.922 He was a sort of sex, sexaholic, a bit of a pornocrat. 35:53.522 --> 35:54.502 Um, but that was it. 35:54.562 --> 35:55.623 He never took any drugs. 35:55.663 --> 36:01.244 The worst thing he did was smoke a lot of Siggy's, which may have contributed to his eventual demise, unfortunately. 36:02.446 --> 36:10.524 But he was a great guy, I've always been a big fan of his and this is a track from one of his best albums, Overnight Sensation, and it's called Camarillo Brillo, hope you like it. 36:11.269 --> 36:13.250 Frank Zappa there with Camarillo Brillo. 36:13.911 --> 36:16.432 This is Adam and Joe here on BBC Six Music. 36:16.932 --> 36:19.074 What's that all about in that title, Camarillo Brillo? 36:19.214 --> 36:20.514 Is he saying that something is Brillo? 36:20.534 --> 36:22.415 Like Brillo pads, really good. 36:23.136 --> 36:24.156 Is Camarillo a place? 36:24.297 --> 36:24.957 I think it is. 36:25.277 --> 36:25.977 Like Amarillo. 36:26.058 --> 36:27.158 I know Amarillo. 36:27.258 --> 36:28.999 Yeah, maybe it's a kind of a car. 36:29.219 --> 36:29.820 I'm not sure. 36:29.860 --> 36:34.542 It's a load of arcane American references that I'm not familiar with, but it's nice. 36:34.582 --> 36:35.283 I like his voice. 36:36.223 --> 36:40.345 Even though he's just mining pretty much one little tune there. 36:40.725 --> 36:42.765 He just carries on, he's not bothered about it. 36:42.785 --> 36:45.986 The worst you can say about Frank Zappa is that his voice is very insincere. 36:46.006 --> 36:46.767 Do you know what I mean? 36:47.247 --> 36:49.768 Like he's... He's... He's... He's got... He's got his length kind of business. 36:49.868 --> 36:50.648 Yeah, exactly. 36:51.188 --> 36:52.529 But I don't mind that. 36:52.689 --> 36:56.730 You know, you couldn't only listen to Frank Zappa would drive you nuts, but every now and again it's nice. 36:56.910 --> 36:58.611 It's like a little tasty doughnut. 36:59.031 --> 37:05.173 Hey, this is Adam and Joe on BBC Six Music, the station where we play six bits of music. 37:05.613 --> 37:06.414 over and over again. 37:06.494 --> 37:06.994 That's true. 37:07.014 --> 37:07.914 Yeah, it's not true. 37:08.135 --> 37:08.675 No, isn't it? 37:08.955 --> 37:09.135 No. 37:09.355 --> 37:09.856 Okay. 37:09.876 --> 37:10.556 A lot more than that. 37:11.056 --> 37:14.078 You know, one of the weirdest things I saw on Telly over Christmas. 37:14.238 --> 37:15.239 Oh, yeah. 37:15.499 --> 37:18.000 Was Shane McGowan on TV burp. 37:18.480 --> 37:18.660 Wow. 37:18.701 --> 37:19.461 Did you catch that? 37:19.501 --> 37:20.181 Didn't catch that. 37:20.562 --> 37:27.566 At the end of Harry Hill's TV burp, he has a bit where he illustrates one of the things he's talking about by having a fight, usually between two celebrities. 37:27.606 --> 37:31.808 It's the kind of thing that goes into the break, bridges the break kind of thing. 37:32.348 --> 37:52.876 But on the Christmas special he announced that I forget what the lead-in was But the build-up was building up to Shane McGowan versus a bottlenose dolphin And I thought it was just a word joke you know a little picture painted for the mind But he gestured to his left lo and behold out came Shane McGowan now looking 37:53.616 --> 38:12.188 quite extraordinary I mean he's always an amazing man to look at yeah because he's lived such a life and he's sort of out of the limelight a lot so every time he pops up it's like kind of looking under a rock and seeing how things are progressing in the nicest possible way you know I think he's a genius he's very seldom sheveled certainly absolutely yeah 38:12.688 --> 38:15.630 And he was looking very, very disheveled. 38:15.710 --> 38:18.412 Yeah, not a lot going on in the tooth department. 38:18.472 --> 38:18.732 Yeah. 38:19.372 --> 38:21.994 The eyes seem to be interested in separate things. 38:23.155 --> 38:25.677 Much too much extra skin on the face. 38:25.917 --> 38:26.137 Right. 38:26.437 --> 38:27.638 All heading downwards. 38:27.918 --> 38:28.619 Yeah. 38:28.679 --> 38:29.399 Big as well. 38:29.879 --> 38:30.560 Uh-huh. 38:30.760 --> 38:31.961 Lots of booze still in there. 38:31.981 --> 38:32.761 The boozy pillow. 38:33.442 --> 38:33.602 Yeah. 38:34.763 --> 38:40.351 But, you know, still understanding, you know, Composementis and punching the dolphin. 38:41.012 --> 38:47.000 And, you know, I really like that when kind of your heroes turn up on slightly mainstream trashy programs. 38:47.020 --> 38:48.902 There's something really cool about that, don't you think? 38:49.043 --> 38:49.804 Yeah, absolutely. 38:49.824 --> 38:50.785 That'll be a great TV moment. 38:51.065 --> 39:12.326 Seeing someone like sort of holier than thou turn up on something because people like that they kind of wouldn't turn up on a on a Respectful program, you know, they kind of purposely go for something a bit a bit mainstream and even though that program is fantastic Yes, brilliant program, but I couldn't quite believe I'd seen it and I thought maybe I was hallucinating That'll be on YouTube presumably won't it? 39:12.386 --> 39:12.687 Maybe 39:13.007 --> 39:14.348 Yeah, I'm gonna have a look at that later on. 39:14.368 --> 39:14.888 It was good. 39:15.048 --> 39:15.768 That sounds excellent. 39:15.788 --> 39:21.031 The best thing, I didn't catch any of those special shows, you know, I didn't see the extras Christmas special or anything like that. 39:21.071 --> 39:31.396 None of the things that you were supposed to watch that were like exciting appointment-to-view type things, instead I caught like loads of dreadful stuff, like I ended up sitting right the way through the best of Top Gear. 39:31.816 --> 39:34.957 I've never watched Top Gear in my life and I watched the best of Top Gear. 39:35.117 --> 39:35.918 It was torture. 39:36.098 --> 39:38.339 There was absolutely nothing else on at the time. 39:39.059 --> 39:44.261 And, uh, I was just flicking around, we were in the countryside, we didn't have satellite or anything, we just had the five channels. 39:44.521 --> 39:47.982 Channel 5 was so fuzzy, you couldn't really see it, it was just like a snowstorm. 39:48.402 --> 39:50.662 So, more or less, that's actually what they were doing for Christmas. 39:50.802 --> 39:51.143 Was it? 39:51.363 --> 39:52.143 Yeah, snowstorm. 39:52.463 --> 39:53.123 Oh, seasonal. 39:53.483 --> 39:53.883 Right. 39:54.023 --> 39:55.204 Right over the Christmas period. 39:55.284 --> 39:55.844 There you go. 39:55.984 --> 40:00.605 Anyway, it was, it was barely watchable, I was quite bored of the snowstorm, so, ended up with Top Gear. 40:00.625 --> 40:01.546 Have you ever watched Top Gear? 40:01.586 --> 40:02.166 Yeah. 40:02.186 --> 40:03.026 I quite like Top Gear. 40:03.286 --> 40:04.547 What is your mental problem? 40:04.607 --> 40:04.987 I like it. 40:05.047 --> 40:06.508 I saw their one where they went to the North Pole. 40:06.568 --> 40:07.589 How can you stand it? 40:07.609 --> 40:09.750 Because it's like Blue Peter for retarded men. 40:09.930 --> 40:11.091 Which is your favourite man? 40:11.811 --> 40:13.012 Uh, I don't like any of them. 40:13.172 --> 40:13.893 No, of course not. 40:13.913 --> 40:15.033 Which is your least favourite man? 40:15.053 --> 40:16.955 How can you deal with Hammond, the hamster? 40:17.755 --> 40:20.537 Well, listen, hey, our producer, Jude, has just... She loves Hammond. 40:20.657 --> 40:21.477 Let's play a record. 40:21.858 --> 40:24.139 Talk about this and make sure we're not hurting anyone's feelings. 40:24.159 --> 40:24.779 Jude loves the hamster. 40:24.799 --> 40:26.040 And then we'll talk about Hammond after this. 40:26.060 --> 40:26.741 People love the hamster. 40:26.761 --> 40:27.581 Listen, they love him. 40:27.901 --> 40:28.942 Here are the Staple Singers. 40:28.962 --> 40:29.883 They hate Hammond. 40:29.903 --> 40:30.283 I can't stand it. 40:30.303 --> 40:30.823 I happen to know. 40:30.863 --> 40:31.984 This is called Let's Do It Again. 40:32.444 --> 40:36.025 That's the New Young Pony Club with The Bomb. 40:36.505 --> 40:38.926 This is Adam and Joe here on BBC Six Music. 40:39.446 --> 40:42.627 Now we came across a band called the Young Pony Club, didn't we? 40:42.687 --> 40:44.688 Are they now called the New Young Pony? 40:44.748 --> 40:48.869 Is that a different band, or have they had to put New in front of them because there's another band called Pony Club? 40:49.349 --> 40:51.369 Something's going on there, some kind of Pony Club politics. 40:51.409 --> 40:56.071 It wasn't, they were called something slightly different, but it was... They were definitely called Young Pony Club, weren't they? 40:56.171 --> 41:00.292 No, there was ponies in there, but it wasn't exactly Young Pony Club. 41:00.892 --> 41:08.357 But anyway, that's the new young pony club, and as far as the world is aware, it's the main pony club to be concerned with at the moment. 41:09.158 --> 41:10.539 Now, we're in the middle of Text the Nation. 41:10.759 --> 41:13.461 Have you got any more mangled celebrity names there, Joe Collins? 41:13.481 --> 41:14.942 Yeah, lots and lots and lots and lots and lots. 41:15.102 --> 41:23.288 Okay, the idea for Text the Nation this week, listeners, is, you know, celebrity names, famous people's names that you mangle domestically for your own personal entertainment. 41:23.328 --> 41:28.632 We're not saying these are brilliantly clever or funny, even though some of them may be, but they're just weirdly satisfying. 41:29.452 --> 41:30.293 Um, so are you ready? 41:30.333 --> 41:31.493 I'm gonna go through them quite fast. 41:31.513 --> 41:32.694 I remembered the name of the band. 41:33.074 --> 41:33.434 What is it? 41:33.554 --> 41:34.575 Vote Show Pony. 41:34.915 --> 41:35.716 Oh, that's right. 41:35.736 --> 41:37.036 It was confusing. 41:37.116 --> 41:37.737 Okay, here we go. 41:37.757 --> 41:39.798 Uh, this is from Matt Garner. 41:39.878 --> 41:43.720 He says, instead of Christopher Eccleston... Can you guess any of these, Adam? 41:43.900 --> 41:45.021 Christopher Eccl's cake. 41:45.121 --> 41:45.601 Correct! 41:45.781 --> 41:46.161 Nice! 41:46.221 --> 41:48.483 Instead of Michael Parkinson... Michael... 41:49.603 --> 41:50.424 Fartinson! 41:50.604 --> 41:52.665 No, Michael Park your bum. 41:52.805 --> 41:54.325 Michael Park your bum. 41:54.445 --> 41:55.466 See, he's a chat show host. 41:55.666 --> 41:55.906 Not at all. 41:55.926 --> 42:02.890 Instead of, and this was one that was very popular in America with the people that don't like the lesbian ladies, instead of Ellen DeGeneres. 42:03.650 --> 42:05.451 Ellen DeGeneres. 42:05.711 --> 42:06.311 Correct. 42:06.571 --> 42:07.132 Oh really? 42:07.172 --> 42:09.393 That's a little bit anti-gay though, isn't it? 42:09.573 --> 42:10.373 Yeah, but you know. 42:10.653 --> 42:10.893 Right. 42:11.034 --> 42:13.155 It didn't even be connected to her sexual preference. 42:13.835 --> 42:15.876 Well, it's bound to be though, isn't it? 42:15.896 --> 42:16.576 With DeGeneres. 42:16.816 --> 42:17.457 That's from Bryn. 42:18.557 --> 42:21.238 Uh, here's another one, this is from Dee, the D-man, Damien. 42:21.599 --> 42:21.759 Yeah. 42:21.779 --> 42:24.760 Uh, instead of Nellie... Uh, hang on, I've forgotten her actual name. 42:24.800 --> 42:25.180 Furtado. 42:25.200 --> 42:25.801 Furtado. 42:26.001 --> 42:27.021 Well, she's almost there. 42:27.041 --> 42:28.062 Or, anyway. 42:28.082 --> 42:32.364 Uh... F-F-F-F-Fartardo? 42:32.964 --> 42:33.284 No. 42:33.504 --> 42:33.804 What? 42:33.964 --> 42:34.805 Nellie Ritado. 42:35.245 --> 42:36.166 Oh, that's not very nice. 42:36.646 --> 42:38.048 Instead of Gwyneth Paltrow. 42:39.489 --> 42:40.810 Gwyneth Poultry. 42:41.110 --> 42:41.851 Poultry. 42:42.191 --> 42:42.772 Poultry. 42:43.072 --> 42:43.352 Right. 42:43.593 --> 42:43.893 Yeah. 42:44.033 --> 42:44.694 Lots of them there. 42:44.874 --> 42:50.519 Maybe it's part and parcel of being famous that you have to have a name that's easily mutated, that people can have fun with. 42:50.719 --> 42:52.441 Well, mine, of course, would be very easy. 42:52.461 --> 42:56.564 You just stick an F at the beginning of Buxton and you're sorted. 42:57.165 --> 42:58.506 That's what used to happen to me at school. 42:58.526 --> 42:59.006 What about you? 43:00.047 --> 43:01.127 Uh, just pasties. 43:01.548 --> 43:02.088 Joe, you know? 43:02.208 --> 43:02.968 Joe Cornish pasty. 43:02.988 --> 43:04.829 Yeah, corn plasters, that kind of thing. 43:04.869 --> 43:05.309 Cornballs. 43:06.029 --> 43:07.069 Never, no one ever said that. 43:08.910 --> 43:14.692 My dad calls Colin Firth, Colin Filth, to annoy my mum as she fancies him, says Becky in Norwich. 43:14.772 --> 43:20.394 Also, when I was a child and a big stock aching and waterman fan in the 80s, my dad called Rick Astley dick ashtray. 43:21.474 --> 43:42.728 dad nice one dad you would have totally dealt with the situation Chris in Whitley Bay says I've heard people using Joe corny as a slight on mr. Cornish recently Joe corny I'm flattered to be talked about anywhere I don't know if it's if this one thing you're not it's corny hey Joe okay yeah I just thought I'd help you out there thanks man 43:44.589 --> 43:51.877 Edward Woodward becomes, says Claire, if you remove all the D's, ee wah woo wah. 43:53.359 --> 43:54.119 That's very lateral. 43:54.139 --> 43:54.920 That's quite good, isn't it? 43:54.960 --> 43:55.561 Ee wah woo wah. 43:56.822 --> 43:57.903 That's all we've got for the moment. 43:58.704 --> 44:00.366 Blobby Williams, of course, is the other one. 44:00.526 --> 44:02.628 More text the nation coming later. 44:02.669 --> 44:03.169 Keep them coming. 44:03.189 --> 44:07.955 Text 64046 or email adamandjo.6musicatbbc.co.uk. 44:08.375 --> 44:09.336 Is it time for the news now? 44:09.436 --> 44:10.437 Yes, here's the news. 44:10.598 --> 44:11.799 Is that where they got their name from? 44:11.839 --> 44:13.982 Yes, that is where the band got their name from. 44:14.002 --> 44:15.984 Does that mean that's their favourite Talking Heads film? 44:16.244 --> 44:18.845 Yeah, no, it's not their favorite. 44:18.885 --> 44:22.247 You'd have to be insane if that was your favorite Talking Heads song, but it's not a bad one. 44:22.287 --> 44:25.428 Come on, that's Talking Heads with Radiohead, that's from there. 44:25.888 --> 44:30.150 Probably, I guess most people would agree, their worst album being True Stories. 44:30.870 --> 44:32.171 Oh, I've got a soft spot for that. 44:32.231 --> 44:34.172 Listen, I've got a big soft spot for it. 44:34.252 --> 44:34.712 I love it. 44:34.972 --> 44:38.373 It was their big launch, it was a movie, and it was supposed to take them to the mainstream. 44:38.473 --> 44:40.134 Yeah, there was even two versions. 44:40.154 --> 44:44.235 There was the soundtrack album of all, like, original music from the film. 44:44.355 --> 44:48.156 Lovely cover design, kind of typeface and logo, that big kind of bold red and white thing. 44:48.176 --> 44:49.337 David Byrne incidental music. 44:49.357 --> 44:49.697 Films good. 44:49.837 --> 44:50.637 Cronus Quartet. 44:50.717 --> 44:52.718 The film's kind of a bit of a lost classic, isn't it? 44:52.778 --> 44:54.278 Is it, or a lost average not very classic? 44:54.298 --> 44:55.418 Haven't watched it recently. 44:55.538 --> 44:56.339 Is it even on DVD? 44:56.379 --> 44:57.079 Yeah, yeah, yeah. 44:57.219 --> 44:57.459 Is it? 44:57.619 --> 44:58.279 Oh yeah, definitely. 44:58.379 --> 45:00.280 It's worth seeing, certainly if you're a Talking Heads fan. 45:00.920 --> 45:07.181 But the album, the album by the band that accompanied the film, the big hit was Wild Wildlife. 45:08.301 --> 45:09.641 And it's an odd one. 45:09.821 --> 45:10.601 It's a very odd one. 45:10.661 --> 45:19.203 It was David Byrne making his transition into kind of his fascination with world music and Cajun and all sorts of different styles and the band was a little bit disparate there. 45:19.783 --> 45:21.743 Anyway, that's more than you needed to know. 45:21.763 --> 45:22.783 Oh, phone call. 45:24.804 --> 45:26.244 Sorry, this goes my new return. 45:29.227 --> 45:29.848 Yeah, there you go. 45:30.448 --> 45:31.509 Yeah, sorry, look at that. 45:32.270 --> 45:36.033 Well, speaking of which, we should remind people what the deal is with Song Wars this week. 45:36.133 --> 45:40.677 Joe and I, as you can hear there, are trying to construct ringtones that you might like to use. 45:40.757 --> 45:41.377 I mean, trying. 45:41.397 --> 45:46.922 Well, okay, we have successfully constructed ringtones that you, the listeners, might like to use on your mobiles. 45:47.603 --> 45:51.246 We don't actually know how to get them from the radio into your mobiles. 45:51.386 --> 45:53.868 We'll sort that out at a later date, if demand is sufficient. 45:54.048 --> 45:54.248 Yeah. 45:55.009 --> 45:55.610 Yeah, exactly. 45:55.930 --> 46:05.021 But I mean, it's a genius conceit there for Joe to actually put his ringtone on the mobile there by demonstrating the efficaciousness. 46:07.528 --> 46:08.269 Don't play that one. 46:08.709 --> 46:09.189 Why not? 46:09.489 --> 46:12.351 Because you stick- Listen, don't make me get angry again. 46:12.411 --> 46:14.852 Hey dude, listen, I really object. 46:15.233 --> 46:17.134 I went- I made extra effort. 46:17.234 --> 46:18.174 I did three. 46:18.334 --> 46:24.057 Listen, I made extra effort and I'm being treated like a pariah and a cheetah. 46:24.117 --> 46:25.218 It's not- Why is that cheetah? 46:25.258 --> 46:26.379 Listen, I'll explain to you carefully. 46:26.399 --> 46:29.100 I went out of my way to do extra work. 46:29.240 --> 46:33.583 Yeah, but after- So if I write an extra long essay, do I get thrown out of school? 46:33.603 --> 46:34.163 He's not listening. 46:34.623 --> 46:36.825 This is what happened, this is what happened. 46:37.226 --> 46:42.050 Last show that we pre-recorded before Christmas, Joe was huffing and puffing. 46:42.251 --> 46:43.372 Oh, all these pre-records. 46:43.592 --> 46:44.473 There's too much stuff. 46:44.753 --> 46:45.894 I haven't got enough material. 46:46.575 --> 46:48.016 You know, we're running out of stuff here. 46:48.557 --> 46:50.479 Can we not do song wars for a few weeks? 46:50.999 --> 46:53.221 So we said, all right, listen, let's just do something simple. 46:53.281 --> 46:55.844 So Joe said, I know, why don't we just do ringtones? 46:55.864 --> 46:57.505 That'll be nice and simple, super short. 46:58.466 --> 47:01.029 We don't have to really kill ourselves to do the ringtones. 47:01.149 --> 47:01.489 Fine. 47:01.850 --> 47:07.976 Everyone agrees that to give Joe a little break, because his brain's running out, we'll do something simple. 47:08.056 --> 47:09.377 This is exactly what happened then. 47:10.978 --> 47:18.025 You wanted to do something super short and easy for Song Wars because you said it was too much to get it together for the new year. 47:18.065 --> 47:18.665 That's fair enough. 47:18.685 --> 47:20.407 I wasn't purely... I was gonna help everybody. 47:20.427 --> 47:23.510 It was an altruistic thing to help us through the Christmas period. 47:23.530 --> 47:23.850 Here we go. 47:23.910 --> 47:24.350 Here we go. 47:24.630 --> 47:29.034 So anyway, everyone agrees and then he comes in with a big arm full of his crazy stuff. 47:29.495 --> 47:31.737 That's not fair though, that's trampling all over the rules. 47:31.757 --> 47:37.061 So you're suggesting that what I was doing was a kind of, you know, deflective tactic? 47:37.938 --> 47:39.540 Is that what you're genuinely suggesting? 47:39.560 --> 47:41.141 That I was like thinking, I know. 47:41.361 --> 47:42.122 No, no, I'm not. 47:42.202 --> 47:47.528 But you can't just suddenly change the rules when it suits you and come in and say, oh, well, you know what? 47:48.048 --> 47:58.338 I know that I wanted to do something easy that didn't take too much effort, but I've decided to go completely the other way and trample all over the rules by having three instead of one for Song Wars, which is no... 47:59.179 --> 48:01.720 I think I've done quite well, because I've managed to play all three. 48:01.880 --> 48:03.301 Yeah, well, you've done very well. 48:03.521 --> 48:05.762 But now we're narrowing it down to just the one. 48:06.082 --> 48:06.342 Yeah. 48:06.942 --> 48:09.884 So we've reminded listeners of yours, I think. 48:10.464 --> 48:10.924 Do you think? 48:11.164 --> 48:11.704 Yeah, I think. 48:11.884 --> 48:13.645 Do you think, no, but that was through the phone. 48:13.685 --> 48:15.466 They might want to hear it in proper stereo. 48:15.486 --> 48:17.086 You made your bed, Mr. Corner. 48:17.126 --> 48:17.347 Yeah. 48:18.127 --> 48:18.647 OK. 48:19.728 --> 48:20.288 Oh, fair enough. 48:20.468 --> 48:21.828 So we'll just hear Adam's one. 48:21.988 --> 48:22.469 Here we go. 48:25.550 --> 48:27.511 You got a call coming in. 48:28.131 --> 48:33.756 Exciting, perhaps it's from an actor or a model, or maybe Russell Brand. 48:35.797 --> 48:42.543 But more likely, it's from someone at work, saying, why ain't you done all your work? 48:42.583 --> 48:50.569 Just let it really all go to voicemail in the second they can leave a chippy message, which you're welcome to ignore. 48:50.910 --> 48:53.712 Anyway, you got this ring to live so differently. 48:55.419 --> 48:58.521 So there you go, that's mine, Adam Buxton's ringtone. 48:58.601 --> 48:59.762 Let's play Joe's. 49:00.262 --> 49:07.587 Come on, I don't want him to be upset about the whole song wars thing. 49:08.288 --> 49:09.068 Here's Joe's. 49:25.439 --> 49:27.320 Yeah, so there you go. 49:27.400 --> 49:33.382 Which one of those would you like to hear coming out of your mobile phone listeners? 49:33.402 --> 49:34.122 Second one. 49:45.226 --> 49:51.751 As you can hear, someone emailed us last year to say, oh, come on, stop being so nice to each other about song wars. 49:51.811 --> 49:53.493 We know there's tension bubbling underneath. 49:53.833 --> 49:56.295 All right, now the tension has properly surfaced this week. 49:56.475 --> 50:03.221 Hey, there's a text here from Jane from BBC Interactive saying we can put the ringtones on the website for download on Monday. 50:04.608 --> 50:07.509 Jane, there's going to have to be financial discussions first. 50:07.529 --> 50:09.911 We're going to have to talk about how we'll split the revenue stream. 50:10.871 --> 50:11.612 So this is it, man. 50:11.632 --> 50:14.253 This is a big one, you know, because fortunes could be made of this. 50:14.313 --> 50:16.334 So it's a very important song for so many reasons. 50:16.394 --> 50:17.715 I'm going to put all three of mine up. 50:17.935 --> 50:18.415 Here we go. 50:18.655 --> 50:21.216 Look, let's now this is your choice. 50:21.236 --> 50:21.717 I'm moving. 50:21.857 --> 50:22.357 I'm moving on. 50:22.397 --> 50:23.417 I'm segueing to another thing. 50:23.437 --> 50:25.899 Look, I found out some facts about Tennesaw for you, Joe. 50:26.559 --> 50:45.755 Hey, so we should just tell people vote for either Adam or Joe on 64046, or email adamandjoe.6musicatbbc.co.uk, the winner of Song Wars this week, possibly the most vitriolic and, uh, you know... divisive song wars of all time will be announced on next week's show. 50:45.815 --> 50:47.356 A lot is riding on this vote. 50:47.596 --> 50:51.159 But now, coming up, here's a record I chose from the album I was talking about earlier there. 50:51.259 --> 50:51.740 Oh, okay. 50:52.180 --> 50:53.701 Ooh, look, Facto's on the iPhone. 50:53.801 --> 50:55.522 On Wikipedia for you, though. 50:56.062 --> 51:00.024 This is from the compilation album put together by the bass player of the Super Furry Animals. 51:00.104 --> 51:02.745 It's called The Furry Selection, and this is by Tennesaw. 51:03.465 --> 51:04.085 It's Ring the Alarm. 51:04.105 --> 51:05.406 You'll recognize it when you hear it. 51:06.086 --> 51:08.167 Some facts about it coming up after the track. 51:08.767 --> 51:10.848 Oh, that just suddenly ended there very quickly. 51:10.888 --> 51:13.389 We were looking at Tennesaw Facto on Wikipedia. 51:13.750 --> 51:14.490 He died when he was 22. 51:14.990 --> 51:15.911 That's tragic. 51:16.391 --> 51:18.532 Killed by a speeding car in Houston, Texas. 51:19.412 --> 51:22.593 There you go, a great loss not only for his family, but for reggae music as well. 51:22.833 --> 51:23.273 Quite right. 51:23.333 --> 51:25.254 Yeah, that's a ring the alarm. 51:25.394 --> 51:30.615 It's a classic track, and yeah, must recommend again that compilation with the furry selection. 51:30.956 --> 51:33.356 If you like a little bit of dub, rub-a-dub-dub. 51:33.536 --> 51:34.297 I love to be rubbed. 51:34.437 --> 51:36.077 Then that's the album for you. 51:36.137 --> 51:37.398 It's really, really very good. 51:38.818 --> 51:41.739 I'll be playing some more from it in forthcoming shows. 51:42.379 --> 51:43.759 So stay tuned. 51:43.799 --> 51:45.320 Have you had the sick bug joke, Ornish? 51:45.640 --> 51:45.780 No. 51:46.280 --> 51:46.961 No sick bug yet. 51:47.001 --> 51:47.781 No sick bug, yeah. 51:48.081 --> 51:50.762 Have you just been, uh, keeping yourself away from humans? 51:51.363 --> 51:53.324 Uh, no, I eat an enormous amount of fruit. 51:53.724 --> 51:55.164 That's not gonna protect you from the bug. 51:55.185 --> 51:57.326 You know, I didn't get ill at all in 2000- 2007. 51:57.706 --> 51:58.206 Did you know? 51:58.266 --> 51:58.466 No. 51:58.866 --> 51:59.286 Not once. 51:59.346 --> 51:59.707 Not once. 51:59.767 --> 52:00.267 No time on. 52:00.307 --> 52:01.567 No, I don't get ill a lot, generally. 52:01.628 --> 52:02.348 Didn't get the snuffles? 52:03.708 --> 52:04.769 No, not in any major way. 52:04.889 --> 52:05.269 Right. 52:05.289 --> 52:06.669 Good job, man. 52:06.689 --> 52:06.949 Yeah. 52:07.270 --> 52:07.810 Very good. 52:07.830 --> 52:10.751 Are you taking any vitamins there or any supplements? 52:10.891 --> 52:11.091 No. 52:11.631 --> 52:11.911 Really? 52:11.971 --> 52:13.372 Just a lot of acid on weekends. 52:13.432 --> 52:13.752 Yeah. 52:14.092 --> 52:15.332 What's your secret then? 52:15.392 --> 52:16.172 Lots of fresh fruit. 52:16.272 --> 52:17.413 I think just lots of fruit. 52:17.573 --> 52:17.993 I don't know. 52:18.013 --> 52:19.714 I eat a lot of fruit. 52:19.734 --> 52:21.394 Watch out for the acid on your teeth, man. 52:21.514 --> 52:21.814 Yeah? 52:21.914 --> 52:22.334 Yeah. 52:23.135 --> 52:24.395 It can really play havoc. 52:24.475 --> 52:24.795 Really? 52:25.055 --> 52:27.276 I'm not listening to the downsides of fruit. 52:27.436 --> 52:27.576 No. 52:27.696 --> 52:29.317 People say it's going to make me more farty. 52:30.077 --> 52:32.999 People say it's gonna make me go, you know, yellow. 52:33.019 --> 52:33.460 Mmm. 52:33.700 --> 52:34.821 Because of all the oranges. 52:35.141 --> 52:35.301 Right. 52:35.562 --> 52:37.383 But I don't listen to them, I'm just gonna eat that fruit. 52:37.503 --> 52:38.284 It's good for you. 52:38.324 --> 52:39.184 It's basically good for you. 52:39.204 --> 52:40.045 Little sweet apples. 52:40.205 --> 52:40.465 Mmm. 52:40.626 --> 52:41.046 Oh. 52:41.146 --> 52:42.167 What's your favourite kind of apple? 52:42.227 --> 52:43.508 Little sweet, uh, royal gala. 52:43.528 --> 52:44.269 Ever had a Fuji? 52:44.809 --> 52:45.690 Mmm, don't like the Fugees. 52:45.930 --> 52:47.051 You don't like the Fugees? 52:47.111 --> 52:47.311 Nah. 52:47.951 --> 52:48.392 Why not? 52:48.752 --> 52:50.734 I just don't like, um... One time! 52:51.374 --> 52:52.755 That's where you were going, wasn't it? 52:52.956 --> 52:53.496 Yeah. 52:53.956 --> 52:55.318 Yeah, it was delicious. 52:55.478 --> 52:57.820 Listen, you better watch out, though, because you'll get the bug. 52:58.220 --> 53:00.322 Everyone gets the bug, the norovirus. 53:00.342 --> 53:01.623 I'll wash my hands when I come indoors. 53:02.544 --> 53:04.745 Uh... Always wash your hands with soap and water when you come in the house. 53:04.766 --> 53:05.486 It's not gonna help you. 53:05.686 --> 53:06.127 Oh, it does. 53:06.207 --> 53:07.548 Everyone gets the norovirus. 53:07.728 --> 53:08.709 What's the norovirus? 53:08.729 --> 53:09.249 This is it, man. 53:09.289 --> 53:11.931 It's called the winter... The winter vomiting bug. 53:11.992 --> 53:13.153 Yeah, it's the... Never had it. 53:13.373 --> 53:13.613 It's new. 53:13.633 --> 53:15.214 I've never vomited from a cold, ever. 53:15.234 --> 53:15.374 No. 53:15.735 --> 53:15.875 No. 53:16.455 --> 53:18.736 I haven't vomited since about 1987. 53:18.996 --> 53:19.476 Right. 53:19.536 --> 53:21.657 Seriously, I don't vomit. 53:21.717 --> 53:24.058 Man, I hadn't vomited for a long time before I got this one. 53:24.138 --> 53:26.899 It was not a welcome return to vomit land. 53:27.400 --> 53:28.320 It was awful. 53:28.700 --> 53:36.824 And the worst thing about the virus, if you're unlucky enough to get it, listeners, is that you can't even enjoy yourself when you're lying there in bed, you know? 53:36.844 --> 53:44.727 Because one of the nice things about being ill is you can just lie there, do a bit of work, maybe read some books that you were meaning to read for ages, watch a few movies, you know? 53:45.367 --> 53:48.609 You can't even do that because you're constantly nauseated, right? 53:48.629 --> 53:52.492 You're right on the verge of the vomitorium and it's uncomfortable. 53:52.592 --> 53:54.193 You can't really sleep properly. 53:54.413 --> 53:55.534 It's just the worst. 53:55.694 --> 53:59.036 Luckily it only lasts about a day and then you're sorted. 53:59.076 --> 54:00.737 But you're not supposed to go out afterwards. 54:00.797 --> 54:06.841 Don't go into contact with other human beings for a couple of days because you're still contagious and this thing could get way out of hand. 54:07.401 --> 54:09.603 You know, we might have to get Dustin Hoffman involved. 54:10.283 --> 54:15.805 and the whole place, it might turn into I Am Legend, which would be incredibly boring. 54:16.466 --> 54:19.727 So, for goodness sake, take care of yourself, is what I'm saying. 54:19.747 --> 54:20.647 That was a little public health. 54:20.707 --> 54:21.768 Yeah, I kind of tuned out. 54:21.868 --> 54:24.489 I just came back in for goodness sake, take care of yourself. 54:24.669 --> 54:24.889 Yeah. 54:24.949 --> 54:25.809 I'm right behind that. 54:26.069 --> 54:27.190 Yeah, just spun round green. 54:27.210 --> 54:27.550 Absolutely. 54:28.671 --> 54:30.471 Listen, here's a band called the Duke Spirit. 54:30.491 --> 54:32.112 This is a track called The Step and the Walk. 54:32.212 --> 54:35.913 All we know about them is the following six words written on this sheet. 54:36.434 --> 54:39.115 They toured the UK in November. 54:39.475 --> 54:39.675 Ooh. 54:40.356 --> 54:42.358 That's the Step on the Walk by the Duke Spirit. 54:42.518 --> 54:44.059 They toured the UK in November. 54:44.079 --> 54:52.486 They've got a beautiful and funny lead singer called Lila Moss, and that's from their forthcoming second album called Neptune, which is in the shops on February the 4th. 54:52.986 --> 54:54.948 Joe, who said we don't know nothing about them? 54:54.968 --> 54:55.889 Exactly, exactly. 54:56.590 --> 55:02.538 Uh, now the-the-the-the direct decorations are still up and- Hey, listeners, you've gotta take your decorations down today. 55:02.699 --> 55:03.279 Today, is it? 55:03.460 --> 55:05.082 Yeah, today's the deadline, is it not? 55:05.162 --> 55:05.843 Or is it tomorrow? 55:06.384 --> 55:08.827 You know what happens if you don't take your decorations down? 55:09.008 --> 55:09.128 Oh. 55:09.669 --> 55:10.670 Evil Santa comes. 55:11.351 --> 55:14.733 Good Santa comes on Christmas Day if you have the decorations up and leave them in spies. 55:14.793 --> 55:17.235 If you don't take them down, Evil Santa comes. 55:17.315 --> 55:17.655 Satan? 55:18.255 --> 55:19.476 No, he's just Santa. 55:19.656 --> 55:19.856 Right. 55:19.916 --> 55:27.101 He's got a blue suit and he nicks things every day of the year for a whole year until Christmas. 55:27.381 --> 55:27.661 Yeah. 55:28.181 --> 55:28.742 Oppa Santa. 55:29.142 --> 55:32.864 Yeah, and if you're unlucky, he'll have an affair with your girlfriend or wife. 55:33.565 --> 55:34.485 Oh, that happens anyway. 55:34.765 --> 55:35.265 Santa's really? 55:35.285 --> 55:37.547 Yeah, the real Santa's got cop launched a snog who he wants. 55:37.807 --> 55:38.287 It's true. 55:38.467 --> 55:39.468 Women love Santa. 55:39.548 --> 55:40.148 They really do. 55:40.168 --> 55:41.429 They go crazy for Santa. 55:41.449 --> 55:42.489 Nothing gets a woman hotter. 55:43.590 --> 55:44.390 Than Santa. 55:45.071 --> 55:46.352 Than a big fat man in a chimney. 55:46.992 --> 55:48.473 I ain't gonna miss Santa. 55:49.053 --> 55:50.074 Oh, Santa. 55:50.174 --> 55:50.874 I am. 55:50.894 --> 55:53.175 You know, I see so little of him. 55:53.355 --> 55:54.676 I've seen so little of him. 55:54.916 --> 55:56.277 My brother used to set traps for him. 55:56.417 --> 56:09.069 He pops around at Christmas, people still believe in the Santa, you know, my little nephew who was about eight or nine, quite old you would think to still be, that is old, in Santa conflict land. 56:09.630 --> 56:16.236 He got genuinely upset about it because he basically knows and his older brothers have told him, like obviously there's no such thing. 56:16.596 --> 56:16.816 thing. 56:16.976 --> 56:17.557 Oh, what? 56:17.697 --> 56:18.878 Oh, I'm not supposed to say that, am I? 56:19.018 --> 56:20.659 Because, you know, some children are listening. 56:21.160 --> 56:24.182 But he is, man, he's really conflicted. 56:24.222 --> 56:25.123 He absolutely doesn't know. 56:25.263 --> 56:28.685 Listen, children, there's no conclusive proof either way, all right? 56:28.705 --> 56:30.247 So you believe what you want to believe. 56:31.347 --> 56:33.449 But, man, he was struggling with it. 56:33.569 --> 56:36.912 He was in tears on Christmas Eve just saying, I don't know what to believe. 56:37.816 --> 56:39.017 I felt really bad for him. 56:39.117 --> 56:39.898 He was in tears. 56:40.078 --> 56:40.679 Yeah, he was. 56:40.719 --> 56:46.805 He was absolutely distraught because he was getting so many conflicting messages, you know, from the kids telling him the cynical line. 56:46.825 --> 56:49.047 Surely, why does it matter to him as long as you get the prezzies? 56:49.407 --> 56:52.110 No, because it's about more than that, Joe. 56:52.190 --> 56:52.650 Is it, though? 56:52.831 --> 56:55.033 Try cast your mind back to the magical times. 56:55.053 --> 56:55.193 I can't. 56:55.313 --> 56:58.296 All I knew was that a weird man was breaking into my house and... 56:58.516 --> 57:06.259 Did you get no excitement out of the fact, though, that there was like an actual physical presence involved in the whole situation? 57:06.899 --> 57:07.499 Like a bloke. 57:07.779 --> 57:09.960 Yeah, like a strange guy, you know. 57:10.120 --> 57:11.160 You know what, I can't remember. 57:11.220 --> 57:13.081 I remember my brother laying traps for Santa. 57:13.201 --> 57:13.421 Right. 57:13.881 --> 57:14.682 Well, he was excising about it. 57:14.702 --> 57:16.242 And that caused some difficulty for my parents. 57:16.322 --> 57:16.502 Yeah. 57:17.403 --> 57:18.103 And you never thought, 57:19.043 --> 57:27.629 I think I think I saw him you never like your parents didn't like used to creep into your room with the stockings and stuff and then Then you would think I think I saw him mummy. 57:27.649 --> 57:28.770 I think I saw him last night. 57:28.790 --> 57:29.050 Do you? 57:29.210 --> 57:37.917 Yeah, did you definitely I can remember a couple of Christmases where I was pretty confused because the most of my brain was telling me no Some kids have parents who actually dress up in a costume. 57:38.217 --> 57:38.637 That's right. 57:38.657 --> 57:39.077 Of course. 57:39.138 --> 57:39.338 Yeah 57:40.118 --> 57:42.241 I don't think my parents ever did that. 57:42.721 --> 57:44.063 Not that they would have done, of course, children. 57:44.864 --> 57:45.785 Because they had nothing to do with it. 57:46.165 --> 57:47.427 It was the big fat man. 57:47.687 --> 57:49.429 But take those decos down, today or tomorrow. 57:49.609 --> 57:50.430 Yeah, absolutely. 57:50.450 --> 57:50.891 And burn them. 57:51.011 --> 57:51.892 You have to burn them. 57:52.292 --> 57:52.613 Really? 57:52.893 --> 57:53.113 No. 57:53.373 --> 57:54.455 No, you don't burn the tinsel. 57:54.535 --> 57:55.856 That's bad for the planet. 57:56.357 --> 57:59.400 But if you want to be certain that Evil Santa won't come, you would burn them. 57:59.420 --> 58:00.361 Did you have a tree this year? 58:01.162 --> 58:01.402 Yes. 58:01.983 --> 58:03.183 Uh, have you disposed of it already? 58:03.203 --> 58:03.243 No. 58:03.344 --> 58:03.544 No. 58:03.564 --> 58:05.565 Today, this afternoon. 58:05.605 --> 58:06.005 What do you do? 58:06.025 --> 58:07.186 Do you just put it outside? 58:07.266 --> 58:07.626 Eat it. 58:07.846 --> 58:08.887 Always eat it. 58:09.087 --> 58:09.807 Eat it? 58:09.827 --> 58:10.148 Yeah. 58:10.168 --> 58:10.928 How do you prepare it? 58:10.968 --> 58:11.909 Just use it as a garnish. 58:12.149 --> 58:12.869 That's nice. 58:13.029 --> 58:13.770 One very big garnish. 58:13.790 --> 58:15.031 Like a big sprig of parsley? 58:15.071 --> 58:16.311 Yeah, a huge sprig. 58:16.391 --> 58:16.612 Yeah. 58:16.632 --> 58:18.933 On one mince pie, we have the last mince pie. 58:19.553 --> 58:22.555 Stick the tree in the top of it, pour some honey on it, eat it. 58:22.795 --> 58:23.015 Yeah. 58:23.236 --> 58:23.636 Yum, yum. 58:23.996 --> 58:43.848 that's nice and that's good for the environment as well it is should we have another trail you end up with a very prickly poo though no we're not having a trail who would want to trail hey this is a bit of rhythm and blues from the good old days this is howlin wolf the primitive drum sequencing of run dmc an early primeval hip-hop band from america can you imagine how a detail 58:44.008 --> 58:45.909 How giant that drum machine must have been. 58:45.929 --> 58:48.930 It must have been the size of three houses. 58:49.070 --> 58:49.510 It's true. 58:49.670 --> 58:57.132 In the early days of computing, drum machines, they used to take up the size of a football pitch to make the sound of a cymbal. 58:57.273 --> 58:58.893 In the early days of hip hop, that's right. 58:58.913 --> 59:03.255 It used to take a sort of aircraft carrier just to get the samples in there. 59:03.375 --> 59:06.175 Now you can get the whole Wu-Tang Clang on the head of a pin. 59:06.696 --> 59:07.936 Amazing, isn't it? 59:08.176 --> 59:09.377 How times have moved on. 59:09.557 --> 59:10.217 That's true. 59:10.797 --> 59:14.839 I was thinking about, uh, there's lots of Wu-Tang Clan, or is it just one on Knocked Up? 59:15.799 --> 59:16.500 Uh, yeah, yeah. 59:16.680 --> 59:17.460 That's a good one, isn't it? 59:17.480 --> 59:18.520 I hadn't heard that one before. 59:18.600 --> 59:19.501 The one at the very beginning. 59:19.821 --> 59:23.603 Uh, that's, isn't that Shimmy Shimmy by Old Dirty Beastard? 59:23.663 --> 59:23.983 Yeah. 59:24.243 --> 59:24.763 Beastard. 59:24.903 --> 59:26.804 That was good, there was some good music on that film. 59:27.364 --> 59:30.065 Uh, as opposed to A Good Year, is it? 59:30.106 --> 59:30.826 The Ridley Scott ones. 59:30.846 --> 59:31.506 Oh, did you see that? 59:31.566 --> 59:32.947 Well, because you said it was worth seeing. 59:32.967 --> 59:33.187 Yeah. 59:33.647 --> 59:36.108 So I sat down last night and tried to watch it. 59:36.128 --> 59:40.890 This is the one with Russell Crowe as a kind of city boy who goes off to live the good life of Provence. 59:41.991 --> 59:42.831 Deliciously poor. 59:43.031 --> 59:44.212 I didn't make it through. 59:44.772 --> 59:46.493 You've got to see it at a cinema where you're trapped. 59:46.553 --> 59:46.793 Right. 59:46.813 --> 59:48.454 It's a big screen, you know. 59:48.674 --> 59:52.236 And part of the problem with the whole thing is that it's got some of the worst 59:52.796 --> 59:58.079 film music like songs, you know, use of songs that I've ever heard in my life. 59:58.540 --> 01:00:08.826 And I couldn't, I didn't make it through to the end, so I didn't see if they were songs that were specially written for the film, or if it was stuff that Riddles had gone out and then it turned up on his iPod and he thought, oh, this is gonna be good for the film. 01:00:08.846 --> 01:00:10.187 I'll pop this one in the film. 01:00:10.947 --> 01:00:11.828 Oh my lordy. 01:00:11.888 --> 01:00:14.289 I might try and find some of it and bring it in next week. 01:00:14.309 --> 01:00:15.370 Do, I can't remember the music. 01:00:15.590 --> 01:00:16.591 It was shocking. 01:00:16.611 --> 01:00:18.572 Is it all like Renault Clio advert type stuff? 01:00:18.852 --> 01:00:20.073 No, it's nothing that good. 01:00:20.093 --> 01:00:24.737 It's like sort of overwrought sub Rufus Wainwright ballads. 01:00:25.238 --> 01:00:26.959 But up-tempo, it's hard to describe. 01:00:26.999 --> 01:00:28.620 It was really horrible music. 01:00:28.821 --> 01:00:29.941 Great film. 01:00:30.202 --> 01:00:31.683 And yeah, I'm going to see it. 01:00:31.803 --> 01:00:33.064 I'm going to try and bring some film. 01:00:33.404 --> 01:00:34.145 What a film. 01:00:34.305 --> 01:00:37.087 So here's a quick email from Green Cools. 01:00:37.988 --> 01:00:38.929 What sort of a name is that? 01:00:54.947 --> 01:00:56.468 He sliced his lip with it. 01:00:56.788 --> 01:00:57.669 Immediately stabbed myself. 01:00:57.689 --> 01:00:59.530 That kind of dampened the excitement on the day. 01:00:59.890 --> 01:01:00.711 But how's it been going? 01:01:01.151 --> 01:01:01.851 It's been good, man. 01:01:01.871 --> 01:01:03.172 I haven't got it with me. 01:01:03.653 --> 01:01:03.893 No. 01:01:04.093 --> 01:01:04.813 Have you been playing it? 01:01:04.833 --> 01:01:05.514 Have you played it at all? 01:01:05.534 --> 01:01:05.914 Be honest. 01:01:06.154 --> 01:01:06.294 No. 01:01:06.454 --> 01:01:08.836 Have your fingers touched it since that day? 01:01:08.856 --> 01:01:09.076 Yes. 01:01:09.176 --> 01:01:11.077 I played it for my son when I got home. 01:01:11.117 --> 01:01:11.417 Did you? 01:01:11.457 --> 01:01:13.779 He wanted to know what it was and he was fascinated by it. 01:01:13.799 --> 01:01:13.939 Really? 01:01:13.979 --> 01:01:14.579 How did that go? 01:01:14.599 --> 01:01:15.060 It was good, man. 01:01:15.100 --> 01:01:15.760 He thought it was amazing. 01:01:15.780 --> 01:01:16.420 Don't let him try. 01:01:16.460 --> 01:01:17.021 It's dangerous. 01:01:17.181 --> 01:01:18.762 I said no, I kept it away from him. 01:01:18.942 --> 01:01:21.103 Because there's two types of those things you can get. 01:01:21.143 --> 01:01:23.985 You can get one that looks, it's sort of mushroomy. 01:01:24.005 --> 01:01:53.175 an expensive one and a cheap one and then well no I thought yours was charming and the one that Joe picked up which was like a sort of decorated little cardboard tube with a very sharp metal prong in it stuffed inside and basically you kind of vibrated the prong against your lip but I was a little tooty maybe we had some champagne in the studio when we did that pre-record and I just whipped it out not knowing what it was in my excitement and jammed the thing right through my lip pretty much it was real I was bleeding all over the area 01:01:53.775 --> 01:01:56.656 But no, it was a lovely present and I'll cherish it forever. 01:01:57.496 --> 01:01:58.736 Bring it in next week and play some. 01:01:58.896 --> 01:01:59.516 Maybe I will. 01:01:59.616 --> 01:01:59.776 Yeah. 01:01:59.816 --> 01:02:01.117 Things to remember for next week. 01:02:01.177 --> 01:02:02.597 Music from a good year. 01:02:03.097 --> 01:02:04.117 Yeah, and jaw harp. 01:02:04.137 --> 01:02:04.337 Jaw harp. 01:02:04.377 --> 01:02:05.778 There you go, Kuzi and Dee Dee. 01:02:06.178 --> 01:02:07.818 That's dealt with that one there for you. 01:02:07.938 --> 01:02:10.519 I've got a... Have you got anything else there, Joe, that you need to read out? 01:02:10.559 --> 01:02:11.019 No, shoot. 01:02:11.179 --> 01:02:12.859 I've got a track for you listeners. 01:02:13.960 --> 01:02:15.940 I picked these at random during the week, you know. 01:02:16.040 --> 01:02:19.761 Jude, our producer, she emails us and says, what do you want to play on the weekend chaps? 01:02:20.501 --> 01:02:22.862 And it's always the wrong moment for some reason, do you know what I mean? 01:02:22.962 --> 01:02:28.085 Like, you sort of hear things as you're going along or listening on your iPod and you think, hey, that's going to be good for the show. 01:02:28.425 --> 01:02:31.806 But then when the email comes through, you're a bit panicked and you think, oh, I've got to respond. 01:02:32.327 --> 01:02:37.109 I just picked some random tracks from a random playlist and this was on one of them. 01:02:37.489 --> 01:02:41.611 But it's one of my favourite police tracks, as in the band The Police, led by Stung. 01:02:42.491 --> 01:02:44.092 Um, but it's not a Stung track. 01:02:44.373 --> 01:02:48.315 It's written by, I think, I'm writing saying, Stuart Copeland, the drummer. 01:02:48.676 --> 01:02:50.977 And I've always got a soft spot for- We do, drummer! 01:02:50.997 --> 01:02:52.198 For Copeland's tracks, you know? 01:02:52.218 --> 01:02:57.401 Because usually when the drummer gets writing, Copeland is a very accomplished film soundtrack composer, amongst other things. 01:02:57.461 --> 01:02:57.822 That's right. 01:02:57.842 --> 01:02:58.102 Yeah. 01:02:58.262 --> 01:03:01.024 But his pop songs are sort of cheesy and ludicrous. 01:03:01.124 --> 01:03:04.786 And I'm always amazed that Stung allowed him to actually put them on the albums. 01:03:04.806 --> 01:03:05.727 You know what I mean, in a way? 01:03:06.487 --> 01:03:08.569 There's a couple that are a total disgrace of his. 01:03:08.969 --> 01:03:09.349 In a good way. 01:03:09.369 --> 01:03:10.010 Which album is this awful? 01:03:10.710 --> 01:03:12.331 This is off Synchronicity, I believe. 01:03:12.391 --> 01:03:13.091 Oh, I love that album. 01:03:13.231 --> 01:03:13.932 Yeah, I really do. 01:03:13.952 --> 01:03:16.393 It's got one of the best songs ever written about, Nessie. 01:03:17.173 --> 01:03:17.854 Right, Synchronicity 2. 01:03:17.934 --> 01:03:20.955 I love pop songs that mention Nessie or Big Foot, anything like that. 01:03:20.995 --> 01:03:23.756 Especially, it's rare to find a song, a serious song. 01:03:24.277 --> 01:03:29.239 You know, you get a lot of tenacious D-type stuff about mythical creatures, but a serious rock song. 01:03:29.259 --> 01:03:31.140 They're all dark Scottish luck. 01:03:31.380 --> 01:03:32.020 I love that. 01:03:32.040 --> 01:03:32.300 Yeah. 01:03:32.601 --> 01:03:35.782 And back then, you know, it was as if Nessie could have existed in the 70s. 01:03:35.802 --> 01:03:38.244 There's a film coming out all about it, of course. 01:03:38.284 --> 01:03:39.284 The Water Horse. 01:03:39.304 --> 01:03:40.425 The Water Horse, yeah. 01:03:40.965 --> 01:03:42.086 They should put that track on it. 01:03:42.566 --> 01:03:43.726 Anyway, that's Synchronicity 2. 01:03:43.926 --> 01:03:46.148 I've picked for you listeners a very odd song indeed. 01:03:46.268 --> 01:03:47.508 It's called Miss Gradenko. 01:03:47.688 --> 01:03:48.049 Enjoy! 01:03:48.169 --> 01:03:48.669 I like that. 01:03:48.689 --> 01:03:49.549 It's good, isn't it? 01:03:49.689 --> 01:03:51.030 Yeah, I like the police a lot. 01:03:51.510 --> 01:03:52.951 I don't suppose you're gonna see them live. 01:03:52.971 --> 01:03:53.912 They're still touring, right? 01:03:54.012 --> 01:03:54.292 I think? 01:03:54.652 --> 01:03:54.872 No. 01:03:54.992 --> 01:03:55.753 Have they finished touring? 01:03:55.873 --> 01:03:56.333 I don't know. 01:03:56.653 --> 01:03:57.173 No idea. 01:03:57.513 --> 01:04:00.395 You're not forking out 75 quid or whatever it is for their coppers. 01:04:00.715 --> 01:04:01.256 No, no. 01:04:01.576 --> 01:04:04.339 Apparently they're playing a storm though, wherever they go, they're great. 01:04:04.499 --> 01:04:06.441 I like to personally see the band. 01:04:07.022 --> 01:04:13.288 These bands that do these reunion tours, they play in such huge arenas that you can't really, one can't afford. 01:04:13.809 --> 01:04:16.592 Yes, you like mortgage your house to sit close enough to see them. 01:04:16.892 --> 01:04:17.132 Right. 01:04:17.332 --> 01:04:19.955 Just like standing in a big field watching a giant telly, isn't it? 01:04:20.095 --> 01:04:21.156 So you didn't go to Zeppels? 01:04:21.517 --> 01:04:22.658 I didn't see the Zeppels, no. 01:04:22.978 --> 01:04:26.501 And sorry to be ignorant, I know everyone knows this, but are they still touring, or is that just a one-off? 01:04:26.521 --> 01:04:29.483 No, that was a one-off, it was a benefit gig, but there's rumours that they might. 01:04:29.843 --> 01:04:31.365 Rarry on touring, yeah. 01:04:31.965 --> 01:04:32.426 Oh, are they? 01:04:32.626 --> 01:04:33.246 Is that official? 01:04:34.047 --> 01:04:34.347 Wow. 01:04:34.687 --> 01:04:36.349 I thought it was kind of like a test gig. 01:04:36.994 --> 01:04:38.355 Well it went very well apparently. 01:04:38.375 --> 01:04:42.499 I think everyone I know who saw it said it was amazing. 01:04:43.160 --> 01:04:50.787 Check this out though, I heard about a friend of mine who got his mate like as a present, he got him tickets to the Zeppels, right? 01:04:50.807 --> 01:04:55.312 To the Zeppels gig for I don't know how much those tickets were, over a thousand pounds. 01:04:55.692 --> 01:04:56.173 But they were a lot. 01:04:56.213 --> 01:04:57.974 You know, it was like about a hundred quid or something. 01:04:58.034 --> 01:04:59.135 Anyway, he got them fairly on. 01:04:59.175 --> 01:05:00.756 He was one of the first people to book the tickets. 01:05:01.376 --> 01:05:10.623 But then, by the time the gig came along, and the prices of the tickets on eBay were just spiraling out of control, astronomically, people were paying thousands of pounds for them. 01:05:11.084 --> 01:05:15.807 So his mate said, listen, you know, I just can't give you these tickets. 01:05:16.588 --> 01:05:18.229 Because he hadn't actually handed the tickets over. 01:05:18.269 --> 01:05:20.431 He said, I could get like a grand for these. 01:05:20.951 --> 01:05:23.533 So I'm not gonna, I'm not gonna give them to you. 01:05:24.694 --> 01:05:27.056 I'm gonna sell them myself instead. 01:05:27.457 --> 01:05:28.558 I'll get you something else. 01:05:28.978 --> 01:05:33.362 This is like the story you told the other week of the friend who bought the friend, the little Banksy. 01:05:33.382 --> 01:05:35.024 That's right, yeah, yeah, yeah. 01:05:35.044 --> 01:05:37.606 Your friends are always involved in- No, no, that was a happy story, though. 01:05:37.626 --> 01:05:43.672 A happy story, yeah, but there's a lot of selling and trading and financial- This is not a close friend. 01:05:43.732 --> 01:05:44.993 It's only two stories. 01:05:45.033 --> 01:05:45.934 It's someone I heard. 01:05:46.395 --> 01:05:46.555 Right. 01:05:47.075 --> 01:05:48.677 But that's pretty rough, isn't it? 01:05:48.717 --> 01:05:50.479 Makes a certain amount of fiscal sense. 01:05:50.699 --> 01:05:52.681 You would be hard put to forgive a friend who did that. 01:05:52.701 --> 01:05:55.363 Maybe they're a hard-up student trying to pay their student loan off. 01:05:55.383 --> 01:05:56.124 I don't think so. 01:05:56.184 --> 01:05:57.325 I think I heard it was there. 01:05:57.545 --> 01:06:02.931 The guy just couldn't bear the idea that he'd bought his mate something that was actually worth thousands of pounds. 01:06:03.451 --> 01:06:05.873 Hey, listeners, this is Adam and Jo on BBC Six Music. 01:06:06.493 --> 01:06:09.095 It's the last hour of our show, coming up to the last 45 minutes. 01:06:10.196 --> 01:06:19.282 Before that record, the police record, we were talking about their track, Synchronicity 2, which features a reference to the Loch Ness Monster, and it's given us a brilliant idea for Song Wars next week. 01:06:20.743 --> 01:06:21.944 Mythical Beast songs. 01:06:22.284 --> 01:06:23.625 Oh, that was for Song Wars, was it? 01:06:23.645 --> 01:06:24.225 Yeah, yeah, yeah. 01:06:24.826 --> 01:06:29.169 Songs about Bigfoot, Sasquatch Yeti, three separate entities, of course. 01:06:29.349 --> 01:06:30.149 Don't get them confused. 01:06:30.770 --> 01:06:31.650 You'll only make them angry. 01:06:32.771 --> 01:06:34.634 the, the, the, the Loch Ness Monster. 01:06:34.974 --> 01:06:35.235 Yeah. 01:06:35.255 --> 01:06:36.016 Poltergeist. 01:06:36.416 --> 01:06:36.897 Ghosts. 01:06:37.558 --> 01:06:39.080 Uh, could we do poltergeist and ghosts? 01:06:39.120 --> 01:06:41.583 No, you think it has to be, it has to be cryptozoological. 01:06:41.923 --> 01:06:43.385 But there aren't that many, are there? 01:06:43.425 --> 01:06:44.407 A unicorn. 01:06:44.667 --> 01:06:47.871 If any, if Adam does a song about a unicorn, I'll be quite upset. 01:06:48.111 --> 01:06:48.392 Why? 01:06:48.412 --> 01:06:49.994 Because I just don't like the sound of it. 01:06:52.117 --> 01:06:52.797 general idea. 01:06:52.978 --> 01:06:53.698 Just the way you turn out. 01:06:53.718 --> 01:06:54.758 I've never really liked unicorns. 01:06:54.818 --> 01:06:56.379 I've never really liked unicorns. 01:06:56.820 --> 01:07:01.382 Even that one in Blade Runner, the prongs, all comes back to Ridley, doesn't it? 01:07:01.922 --> 01:07:02.522 Centaurs? 01:07:02.623 --> 01:07:07.385 No, come on, these have got to be, you know, creatures that some people believe might currently exist on the planet. 01:07:07.605 --> 01:07:08.085 Oh really? 01:07:08.365 --> 01:07:10.567 Yeah, it can't just be like fairy stories. 01:07:10.967 --> 01:07:12.448 Well, there's not that many though, are there? 01:07:12.548 --> 01:07:14.429 Coelacanth, I suppose I could write about. 01:07:14.449 --> 01:07:15.109 No, there's lots, man. 01:07:15.469 --> 01:07:16.190 The chocopopopopora. 01:07:17.219 --> 01:07:17.639 What's that? 01:07:17.659 --> 01:07:19.640 It's a kind of Mexican goat-eating thing. 01:07:19.800 --> 01:07:20.940 I thought it was like a lollipop. 01:07:21.460 --> 01:07:22.221 The Mothman? 01:07:22.281 --> 01:07:22.741 The Mothman? 01:07:22.781 --> 01:07:24.742 You know all about this stuff because you read a lot in times. 01:07:24.762 --> 01:07:25.562 Yeah, it won't take you long. 01:07:25.962 --> 01:07:28.963 Just a quick look up on Arthur C. Clarke's mysterious website. 01:07:29.743 --> 01:07:33.084 Uh, alright then, well listen, I bags the Loch Ness Monster. 01:07:33.404 --> 01:07:34.085 Loch Ness Monster? 01:07:34.325 --> 01:07:35.945 The Loch Ness Monster. 01:07:36.005 --> 01:07:36.586 You've got him. 01:07:36.646 --> 01:07:37.566 The Water Horse. 01:07:38.106 --> 01:07:39.466 The Water Horse, that's right. 01:07:39.927 --> 01:07:41.727 Loch Ness Monster is a sort of benign monster. 01:07:42.147 --> 01:07:43.488 Not like the Yeti that's vicious. 01:07:44.068 --> 01:07:44.488 Bigfoot. 01:07:44.668 --> 01:07:45.809 Oh, horrible little temper. 01:07:45.849 --> 01:07:47.450 Joe's a creature obsessed by Bigfoot. 01:07:48.110 --> 01:07:49.131 I've got a Bigfoot print. 01:07:49.251 --> 01:07:50.612 I've got a cast of his footprint. 01:07:50.872 --> 01:07:51.452 Has it signed? 01:07:53.193 --> 01:07:54.154 No, he couldn't hold the pen. 01:07:54.194 --> 01:07:55.294 He's too angry. 01:07:56.735 --> 01:07:57.376 More music now. 01:07:57.396 --> 01:07:59.357 Here's the new single from the White Stripes. 01:07:59.397 --> 01:08:00.317 This is Conquest. 01:08:01.338 --> 01:08:03.359 Text the nation. 01:08:03.379 --> 01:08:04.560 Text, text, text. 01:08:04.660 --> 01:08:05.400 Text the nation. 01:08:05.460 --> 01:08:06.461 What if I don't want to? 01:08:06.681 --> 01:08:07.381 Text the nation. 01:08:07.401 --> 01:08:08.502 But I'm using email. 01:08:08.682 --> 01:08:09.402 Is that a problem? 01:08:09.422 --> 01:08:09.983 It doesn't matter. 01:08:10.023 --> 01:08:10.243 Text! 01:08:12.816 --> 01:08:19.719 Yes, it's Text the Nation time here on the Adam and Jo radio show thing on BBC Six Music this Saturday morning. 01:08:20.220 --> 01:08:25.662 And this morning we've been asking you to text in your mangled famous people's names that you use in your households. 01:08:26.502 --> 01:08:30.064 Whatever kind of modern cohabitation or setup you have. 01:08:30.484 --> 01:08:33.826 Maybe two gay men and one lesbian. 01:08:34.386 --> 01:08:37.668 Maybe six lesbians, one gay man and an old man. 01:08:38.448 --> 01:08:41.010 And... I don't know, a policeman. 01:08:42.811 --> 01:08:44.092 Maybe a disabled policeman. 01:08:44.512 --> 01:08:45.493 A disabled policeman. 01:08:46.133 --> 01:08:50.436 Three lesbians, two gay men, and... What about the straights? 01:08:50.496 --> 01:08:52.257 Why don't they get a look in here? 01:08:52.517 --> 01:08:53.358 It's just not very modern. 01:08:53.978 --> 01:08:54.078 Oh. 01:08:54.358 --> 01:08:55.239 It's a bit of old hat. 01:08:55.259 --> 01:08:56.180 It's an old-fashioned straight. 01:08:56.220 --> 01:08:56.680 It's been done before. 01:08:56.720 --> 01:08:57.500 Yeah, it's been done, isn't it? 01:08:57.520 --> 01:08:57.701 Yeah. 01:08:58.241 --> 01:08:59.382 Oh, how did we get into that? 01:08:59.822 --> 01:09:00.803 You got into that, mate. 01:09:01.323 --> 01:09:03.604 You ploughed us into that one. 01:09:03.624 --> 01:09:04.405 Can you get me out of it? 01:09:04.885 --> 01:09:05.345 Please. 01:09:05.486 --> 01:09:05.886 Here we go. 01:09:05.926 --> 01:09:06.586 Grab hold of this. 01:09:07.026 --> 01:09:07.467 Not that! 01:09:07.947 --> 01:09:08.167 Yeah. 01:09:08.848 --> 01:09:17.757 So yeah, we've been asking you to text in ways that you mangle celebrities' names in your houses to make it more interesting when you see their faces all over the shop. 01:09:18.537 --> 01:09:23.682 And you know, these aren't particularly witty or original, but there's something strangely satisfying about them. 01:09:24.763 --> 01:09:25.824 Of course, Hugh Grant. 01:09:26.926 --> 01:09:27.186 Yeah. 01:09:27.306 --> 01:09:27.847 Huge grunt. 01:09:28.007 --> 01:09:28.648 Huge grunt. 01:09:28.788 --> 01:09:28.968 Yeah. 01:09:29.028 --> 01:09:30.709 He might as well change his name to huge grunt. 01:09:32.090 --> 01:09:38.276 And I think that's one of the things, you know, another part of this is, is the theory that to have a name that can be easily mangled actually helps you. 01:09:38.376 --> 01:09:38.836 That's true. 01:09:39.076 --> 01:09:40.718 Up the slippery showbiz slope. 01:09:41.338 --> 01:09:42.259 Huge grunt. 01:09:42.539 --> 01:09:45.202 Steven Rodley reminding us of huge grunt. 01:09:46.443 --> 01:09:48.144 Here's an email from Helen Williams. 01:09:48.865 --> 01:09:49.625 Jim Carrey. 01:09:49.966 --> 01:09:50.826 Jim Carrey on. 01:09:51.527 --> 01:09:54.470 Because his films are ridiculous, like carry-ons. 01:09:54.610 --> 01:09:55.270 Right, right, right. 01:09:55.310 --> 01:09:55.531 Yeah? 01:09:55.811 --> 01:09:56.031 Yeah. 01:09:56.311 --> 01:09:57.132 For Demi Moore? 01:09:58.594 --> 01:10:01.917 Uh, Demi... No, you can't say that! 01:10:01.937 --> 01:10:02.317 Can I not? 01:10:02.697 --> 01:10:02.958 No. 01:10:03.018 --> 01:10:05.440 Sorry, I was spelling it H-O-A-R-E. 01:10:06.281 --> 01:10:06.701 Oh, right. 01:10:06.841 --> 01:10:08.042 You know, it's like a family name. 01:10:08.322 --> 01:10:08.943 Oh, whore. 01:10:09.363 --> 01:10:09.804 Yes. 01:10:09.864 --> 01:10:10.785 Whore. 01:10:11.005 --> 01:10:11.405 Whore. 01:10:12.566 --> 01:10:15.049 Uh, Helen Williams calls Demi Moore. 01:10:15.149 --> 01:10:16.150 Demi Talented. 01:10:17.000 --> 01:10:18.382 Yeah, half talented. 01:10:18.682 --> 01:10:18.782 Oh. 01:10:19.083 --> 01:10:19.363 Yeah? 01:10:19.483 --> 01:10:20.444 That is very sophisticated. 01:10:20.464 --> 01:10:22.006 You thought she was just being flattering. 01:10:22.066 --> 01:10:22.247 Yeah. 01:10:22.647 --> 01:10:25.210 Instead of calling her Demi Moore, I call her Demi Talented. 01:10:25.271 --> 01:10:26.072 Demi Talented. 01:10:26.092 --> 01:10:26.812 Because she's so talented. 01:10:26.832 --> 01:10:27.754 Do you know what I call her? 01:10:28.054 --> 01:10:29.195 Demi Fantastic. 01:10:30.012 --> 01:10:31.093 Uh, Janet Street Porter. 01:10:32.614 --> 01:10:33.735 Uh... Janet Street Cleaner. 01:10:34.416 --> 01:10:34.696 Yeah? 01:10:34.776 --> 01:10:35.097 Right. 01:10:35.257 --> 01:10:35.377 Eh? 01:10:35.397 --> 01:10:37.158 Let's roll from Helen. 01:10:37.399 --> 01:10:39.961 It's alright, you're allowed to feel a bit silent about these. 01:10:40.561 --> 01:10:40.782 Yeah. 01:10:41.322 --> 01:10:42.683 Uh, here's one from Richard Hitchens. 01:10:43.484 --> 01:10:45.286 My brother and I always pronounce Sean Connery. 01:10:45.306 --> 01:10:46.987 Oh no, I can't read that one. 01:10:47.487 --> 01:10:47.828 Richard. 01:10:48.148 --> 01:10:49.549 You know what I thought of one the other day? 01:10:50.150 --> 01:10:54.854 And it was, uh, when I was watching This Morning, usually fronted by Phil and Fern. 01:10:55.034 --> 01:11:09.897 yeah and who was who was standing in but Julian scary really scary do you think he is scary oh my lord have you seen him recently he's he was dressing all super straight and he had like a very natty suit on yeah daytime look 01:11:10.217 --> 01:11:13.602 Yeah, but he can't do the sincerity thing, you know what I mean? 01:11:13.642 --> 01:11:14.463 Very well at all. 01:11:14.984 --> 01:11:20.631 His eyes are slightly lidded and there's a cynical aspect to him that doesn't sit well with the daytime format. 01:11:20.932 --> 01:11:25.077 Plus he has a very young haircut, like he has a young boy's haircut. 01:11:25.718 --> 01:11:29.862 It's sort of a feathery, almost like a schoolboy pageboy cut or something. 01:11:29.902 --> 01:11:30.663 Like Richard Hammond. 01:11:30.943 --> 01:11:35.068 It's very odd, no, not a pageboy cut, but no, it's much shorter than the hamster. 01:11:35.488 --> 01:11:37.290 But anyway, it occurred to me- We met him, haven't we? 01:11:37.330 --> 01:11:37.790 I've met him. 01:11:37.830 --> 01:11:39.933 We met him a couple of times at Jonathan Ross's house. 01:11:39.953 --> 01:11:40.613 Julian Scarry. 01:11:40.853 --> 01:11:41.074 Yeah. 01:11:41.634 --> 01:11:44.677 Jonathan Ross had a go-karting party that we went to. 01:11:44.737 --> 01:11:48.421 During which my girlfriend very nearly got killed by Jonathan's agent in a go-kart. 01:11:48.901 --> 01:11:50.623 And Julian was there, he was very nice. 01:11:51.204 --> 01:11:53.346 I'm not saying he's not a lovely chap. 01:11:53.366 --> 01:11:55.828 His boyfriend at the time was a very old small bald man. 01:11:57.069 --> 01:12:02.536 It surprised me, I thought, you're on telly, you'd have a really attractive boyfriend, but no, tiny, tiny little bald old man. 01:12:02.616 --> 01:12:02.976 There you go. 01:12:03.176 --> 01:12:07.782 No insult to anyone, in case they're still... Very happily cohabiting. 01:12:08.302 --> 01:12:08.643 Brilliant. 01:12:08.923 --> 01:12:10.184 Brilliantly sidestep there, Joe. 01:12:10.224 --> 01:12:10.525 Well done. 01:12:11.366 --> 01:12:11.746 Thanks. 01:12:11.886 --> 01:12:13.608 I should cover all angles legally. 01:12:13.628 --> 01:12:14.709 You should work for the UN. 01:12:16.531 --> 01:12:24.600 My dad is a keen gardener, changing the subject, so some of our mutated names stemmed from gardening, as in spruce forcythia. 01:12:24.880 --> 01:12:25.140 Nice. 01:12:25.260 --> 01:12:27.303 That's quite an elaborate one for gardening, dad. 01:12:27.323 --> 01:12:30.326 Have we had spruce at some manglerization of Bruce Willis yet? 01:12:30.826 --> 01:12:31.186 Uh, no. 01:12:31.246 --> 01:12:31.566 Willy's. 01:12:31.646 --> 01:12:32.667 It's always Willy's, isn't it? 01:12:32.687 --> 01:12:32.807 Yeah. 01:12:33.087 --> 01:12:33.587 It's gotta be. 01:12:33.767 --> 01:12:34.007 Bruce. 01:12:34.728 --> 01:12:35.948 Bruce Forsyth. 01:12:36.068 --> 01:12:37.188 Oh, Bruce Forsyth. 01:12:37.409 --> 01:12:38.569 That's the one I was thinking of. 01:12:38.589 --> 01:12:38.669 Yeah. 01:12:38.969 --> 01:12:39.890 From James and Lewis. 01:12:39.930 --> 01:12:44.431 Back in the 80s, I used to refer to Molly Ringwald as oily ring mold. 01:12:45.031 --> 01:12:45.192 Mmm. 01:12:45.272 --> 01:12:46.072 That's quite good, isn't it? 01:12:46.092 --> 01:12:46.652 That is good. 01:12:46.672 --> 01:12:48.833 Yeah, that's a more sophisticated one from James. 01:12:49.333 --> 01:12:51.494 Uh, Chris also has a Molly Ringwald one. 01:12:52.114 --> 01:12:53.034 Uh, Molly Ringworm. 01:12:53.475 --> 01:12:54.835 Yes, that's, of course, that's the old one. 01:12:54.855 --> 01:12:55.796 That's your standard one. 01:12:55.836 --> 01:12:56.296 Yeah, yeah. 01:12:57.216 --> 01:13:00.797 I can't help but refer to the third doctor who was John Terp-wee. 01:13:01.377 --> 01:13:01.597 What? 01:13:01.757 --> 01:13:02.597 Twerp-wee? 01:13:02.657 --> 01:13:03.298 I meant to say. 01:13:03.598 --> 01:13:04.478 I kind of ruined that one. 01:13:04.498 --> 01:13:05.678 Sorry, Paul Kelly. 01:13:06.258 --> 01:13:06.799 More of these? 01:13:07.619 --> 01:13:09.319 Give us exactly one more. 01:13:10.119 --> 01:13:12.600 Okay. 01:13:12.620 --> 01:13:15.701 My girlfriend Karen uses Lenny crab sticks. 01:13:17.222 --> 01:13:22.084 Come on, they're not supposed to be funny, but you can just imagine someone going, huh, with Lenny Crabsticks again. 01:13:22.964 --> 01:13:23.405 Yeah, exactly. 01:13:23.425 --> 01:13:24.685 And expecting some sort of response. 01:13:24.885 --> 01:13:25.406 That's right. 01:13:25.806 --> 01:13:30.788 Lenny Crabsticks is an absolutely ideal way to conclude that part of the programme. 01:13:31.168 --> 01:13:35.090 That was text to nation, but not, you know, not for nothing. 01:13:35.290 --> 01:13:37.772 Is it known as the nation's favourite feature? 01:13:37.812 --> 01:13:38.012 It is. 01:13:38.832 --> 01:13:41.474 And let's hope it keeps hold of that title in 08. 01:13:41.514 --> 01:13:43.415 Do you know who's a big fan of the feature? 01:13:43.755 --> 01:13:43.975 Who? 01:13:44.216 --> 01:13:45.056 Barack Obama. 01:13:45.256 --> 01:13:45.877 Is that true? 01:13:45.997 --> 01:13:46.997 It's his favourite feature. 01:13:47.017 --> 01:13:48.038 He's the first black president. 01:13:48.058 --> 01:13:52.001 The only thing that worries me, it obviously hasn't done it yet, but it's got to be a shoo-in. 01:13:52.281 --> 01:13:54.702 They can't possibly vote for that nutty other man. 01:13:55.123 --> 01:13:55.903 I hate the Huckabee's. 01:13:56.383 --> 01:13:56.724 Can they? 01:13:57.324 --> 01:13:58.586 Well, is he the Democratic candidate? 01:13:58.646 --> 01:14:00.169 No, he's the Republican. 01:14:00.529 --> 01:14:01.370 I don't know what's going on. 01:14:01.551 --> 01:14:02.492 I know there was a caucus. 01:14:02.793 --> 01:14:03.794 Is that good? 01:14:03.934 --> 01:14:04.896 Yeah, there are several caucuses. 01:14:04.916 --> 01:14:05.337 In Iowa? 01:14:05.617 --> 01:14:06.959 Yeah. 01:14:07.400 --> 01:14:08.501 And Barrett won that one. 01:14:08.522 --> 01:14:12.468 The thing that worries me about Barrett winning is all the big disaster movies have black presidents in them. 01:14:12.708 --> 01:14:14.229 Yeah, you know, it's always Morgan Freeman. 01:14:14.449 --> 01:14:18.070 So the second we get they get a black president, the disaster, that's the trigger for the disaster. 01:14:18.110 --> 01:14:19.170 Aliens are going to invade. 01:14:19.250 --> 01:14:22.492 Actually, no, when Independence Day was Bill Pullman was the president, wasn't it? 01:14:22.512 --> 01:14:22.832 It's true. 01:14:23.172 --> 01:14:26.193 But yes, Morgan Freeman was the Deep Impact. 01:14:26.233 --> 01:14:26.993 Deep Impact president. 01:14:27.013 --> 01:14:27.734 Stay after tomorrow. 01:14:28.554 --> 01:14:28.874 I don't know. 01:14:29.434 --> 01:14:30.715 Yeah, the aliens are going to invade. 01:14:30.735 --> 01:14:33.516 Not saying that's in any way, you know, connected in a meaningful way. 01:14:34.887 --> 01:14:35.990 Lots of people thought it was. 01:14:36.912 --> 01:14:37.693 Play a record. 01:14:37.713 --> 01:14:39.237 No, there's no records now. 01:14:39.537 --> 01:14:40.860 It's going to be news time shortly. 01:14:41.061 --> 01:14:42.644 Are you going to step out to the sales after this? 01:14:42.704 --> 01:14:43.346 Just quickly before we go. 01:14:43.366 --> 01:14:44.228 Step out to the sales? 01:14:44.248 --> 01:14:44.448 Yes. 01:14:47.614 --> 01:14:48.115 No, I'm not. 01:14:48.135 --> 01:14:50.538 Have you ever been to a sale? 01:14:52.100 --> 01:14:52.962 No, I don't know. 01:14:53.322 --> 01:14:54.083 Why would you want to go? 01:14:54.103 --> 01:14:57.247 It's been the HMV or the Xavi one. 01:14:57.308 --> 01:14:58.970 There are other megastores available. 01:14:59.070 --> 01:15:04.317 It's nice when they have a sale in the middle of the year, but the whole idea of doing the winter sale thing is just a total. 01:15:04.998 --> 01:15:07.601 Nightmare anyway, that was just a little aside. 01:15:07.641 --> 01:15:20.534 I was thinking about it now Apparently there are other things going on in the world that you need to know about I find it hard to believe but here with details is the news that was Bell and Sebastian with wrapped up in books But it sounds almost exactly like 01:15:21.095 --> 01:15:25.396 You're gonna find me out in the country by the farmers, boys. 01:15:25.896 --> 01:15:27.297 Ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba. 01:15:27.737 --> 01:15:28.357 You know that track? 01:15:28.397 --> 01:15:29.197 That's a good track. 01:15:29.357 --> 01:15:30.117 Both good tracks. 01:15:30.177 --> 01:15:35.959 Listen, you know, he's done something extra with it, which makes it okay, and Belle and Sebastian have their own unique thing going on. 01:15:35.979 --> 01:15:38.319 I'm just pointing out that there are similarities there. 01:15:38.339 --> 01:15:40.820 He better watch out from a legal point of view, that's all I'm saying. 01:15:41.080 --> 01:15:45.501 This is Adam and Jo here on BBC 6 Music, and now it's time... For a jingle, jingle! 01:15:45.561 --> 01:15:46.562 For a jingle, jingles. 01:15:46.862 --> 01:15:47.242 Jingles. 01:15:47.342 --> 01:15:47.942 Jingle jingles. 01:15:48.875 --> 01:15:57.397 It's time for song wars, the war of the songs A couple of tunes by a couple of proms, so check it out 01:15:58.737 --> 01:15:59.277 Yes, indeed. 01:15:59.318 --> 01:16:00.298 It's not the right jingle. 01:16:00.679 --> 01:16:02.200 I wanted to play for this email. 01:16:02.540 --> 01:16:05.262 Oh, you wanted the... Here's an email from Dick Thompson. 01:16:05.483 --> 01:16:05.643 Right. 01:16:05.723 --> 01:16:06.363 Hi, Adam and Jo. 01:16:06.764 --> 01:16:14.170 Can I just say what a refreshing change it is to hear two well-spoken lads on the radio, instead of those awful estuary English accents we're normally forced to endure. 01:16:14.690 --> 01:16:16.632 Now, I'm sure you have... I'm reading this quite posh now. 01:16:16.932 --> 01:16:17.032 Yeah. 01:16:17.152 --> 01:16:19.574 I'm sure you have high standards in everything else you do. 01:16:19.995 --> 01:16:22.256 So can I point out a little faux pas in one of your jingles? 01:16:22.657 --> 01:16:26.340 In the Song Wars one, you can be heard saying, quote, which one will you vote for? 01:16:26.520 --> 01:16:27.461 Which one is the best? 01:16:27.881 --> 01:16:28.421 close quotes. 01:16:28.901 --> 01:16:33.083 Now I'm sure I don't need to tell you that when comparing two objects, you should be using the word better. 01:16:33.843 --> 01:16:36.705 Best can only be used for three or more objects. 01:16:37.165 --> 01:16:41.106 I've therefore taken the liberty of rewriting the two lines affected by this as follows. 01:16:41.947 --> 01:16:43.007 Which one will you vote for? 01:16:43.347 --> 01:16:44.488 Which one is the better? 01:16:45.008 --> 01:16:47.329 Vote for them now by email, text or letter. 01:16:48.509 --> 01:16:54.034 If there is anything else with which I can help you out, just give me a call, regards Dick Thompson. 01:16:54.495 --> 01:16:57.157 They say email has been scanned by Net Intelligence. 01:16:57.837 --> 01:16:58.338 That's great. 01:16:58.378 --> 01:16:59.539 Thank you very much, Dick, for that. 01:16:59.799 --> 01:17:00.500 That's absolutely true. 01:17:00.540 --> 01:17:01.380 That's correct. 01:17:01.641 --> 01:17:04.343 The subject of the email is suggestion for improving your show. 01:17:05.304 --> 01:17:06.024 That would improve it. 01:17:06.044 --> 01:17:07.746 Do you want to sort that out next week? 01:17:07.786 --> 01:17:08.106 I will. 01:17:08.707 --> 01:17:11.309 Give that to me and I will fix that for you, Dick. 01:17:11.329 --> 01:17:11.849 Make that adjustment. 01:17:12.390 --> 01:17:14.292 Although to take you up on something, 01:17:15.392 --> 01:17:21.696 It's not which one will you vote for which wouldn't scan it's which will you vote for which one is the best? 01:17:22.117 --> 01:17:24.018 That's how it goes currently shame me. 01:17:24.058 --> 01:17:24.838 You've marked him up. 01:17:25.339 --> 01:17:30.262 You know I absolutely marked you is that another another street saying oh, man 01:17:31.764 --> 01:17:36.789 Anyway, to deal with this week, though, boy, what a tense-making song was it's been. 01:17:36.809 --> 01:17:37.810 You know, I'm relaxed about it. 01:17:37.851 --> 01:17:42.796 I've come to terms with the fact that you perceive my generosity of creativity as cheating. 01:17:42.836 --> 01:17:43.877 You know, I know I agree with you. 01:17:43.897 --> 01:17:44.618 I agree with you. 01:17:44.999 --> 01:17:49.183 It must seem like an underhand tactic, but I assure you it was done in all innocence. 01:17:50.024 --> 01:17:53.926 And, uh, now, um, I am a bit... I think I might have chosen the wrong one. 01:17:53.946 --> 01:17:54.907 This is the thing, you see. 01:17:55.107 --> 01:17:59.909 He walks out, feeling as if he's been the victim of some kind of religious persecution. 01:17:59.929 --> 01:18:00.830 Can I switch mine? 01:18:00.850 --> 01:18:01.370 Nope. 01:18:01.530 --> 01:18:02.991 Because I think the other one's better. 01:18:03.091 --> 01:18:05.132 He's gonna go home, he's gonna go... I've got it on here, if you wanna hear it. 01:18:05.152 --> 01:18:07.614 He's gonna go, oh, I got it so hard, no one understands me. 01:18:07.874 --> 01:18:10.295 You know, they give me such a hard time. 01:18:10.315 --> 01:18:11.235 What's cheating? 01:18:11.396 --> 01:18:11.856 Trying both. 01:18:12.576 --> 01:18:13.197 He's doing it again. 01:18:13.217 --> 01:18:14.058 He's doing it again. 01:18:14.078 --> 01:18:15.399 I'm not, I'm not gonna play. 01:18:15.419 --> 01:18:16.360 He's doing it again. 01:18:16.540 --> 01:18:18.662 I thought we'd resolved this, I thought we were gonna move on. 01:18:18.682 --> 01:18:19.763 I'm not gonna play the other one. 01:18:20.023 --> 01:18:23.006 He's gonna walk out of, uh, not gonna play the other one. 01:18:23.026 --> 01:18:24.587 But if somebody happens to call me... 01:18:26.690 --> 01:18:29.872 Look, she's faded in there. 01:18:29.912 --> 01:18:32.113 She's trying her best to fade all the mites there. 01:18:32.554 --> 01:18:34.315 You know, they'll all be up on the website. 01:18:34.375 --> 01:18:41.779 If you're around for the sales in the West End, you might like to look at Joe Cornish coming out of the building at around about 5 past 12. 01:18:42.219 --> 01:18:46.362 He will be looking like Jesus and he will, in his mind, there'll be a halo. 01:18:46.762 --> 01:18:48.243 Why am I being persecuted? 01:18:48.463 --> 01:18:49.604 Why, what have I done wrong? 01:18:50.004 --> 01:18:58.526 I just wanted to bring light to the world with my cheating jingles, and instead I'm being beaten with holly branches for the trouble I've gone to. 01:18:59.006 --> 01:19:00.747 That's what's going on in your mind, isn't it, Jesus? 01:19:00.827 --> 01:19:01.907 I'm turning the other cheek. 01:19:03.247 --> 01:19:03.547 All right. 01:19:03.567 --> 01:19:04.547 Slap me, hit me again. 01:19:04.768 --> 01:19:08.088 So let's remind you listeners of what we have here. 01:19:08.108 --> 01:19:09.009 Let's hear Adam's first. 01:19:09.349 --> 01:19:10.049 Let's hear mine first. 01:19:10.069 --> 01:19:11.809 This is my jingle I want you to vote for. 01:19:11.889 --> 01:19:13.390 Jingle for ringtone. 01:19:13.450 --> 01:19:13.850 Ringtone. 01:19:14.070 --> 01:19:15.110 This is Adam's ringtone. 01:19:17.662 --> 01:19:33.517 You got a call coming in, it's exciting Perhaps it's from an actor or a model Or maybe Russell Brand But more likely, it's from someone at work Saying why ain't you done? 01:19:34.077 --> 01:19:36.740 All your work Just let it ring, it all goes 01:19:42.288 --> 01:20:07.882 Ignore any way you got this ringtone It's so different and so special And there's people all around who haven't heard it before You got a call coming in You got a call coming in On your phone In the old days this was enough But not now You got to have a flipping song To express yourself Before you answer your phone 01:20:08.991 --> 01:20:11.532 There you go, that's Adam's ringtone there. 01:20:11.972 --> 01:20:18.834 Sorry that I didn't load it onto my phone the way Joe did to demonstrate to you exactly how great it would sound coming out of your phone speakers, but use your imagination. 01:20:19.214 --> 01:20:21.114 Now, Joe Cornish, would you like to introduce yourself? 01:20:21.134 --> 01:20:26.776 It's just that that one seems very bassy, and I'm not sure that mobile phone speakers could handle that kind of thing. 01:20:26.796 --> 01:20:27.136 I did. 01:20:27.156 --> 01:20:29.557 What you need is something a bit more sharp and irritating. 01:20:29.617 --> 01:20:30.157 Right, okay. 01:20:30.177 --> 01:20:31.917 You know, a bit more like cheese grater-y. 01:20:32.418 --> 01:20:33.278 That's what the kids like. 01:20:33.918 --> 01:20:35.118 Oh, shut up! 01:20:35.418 --> 01:20:35.999 Kind of thing. 01:20:36.459 --> 01:20:37.299 Something a bit like this. 01:20:38.010 --> 01:20:41.332 telephone yeah joe was grooving around 01:20:56.343 --> 01:20:58.025 There's a lot more to it than meets the ear. 01:20:58.446 --> 01:20:59.227 Let me put it that way. 01:20:59.307 --> 01:21:03.674 You put that on your phone then, you know, hidden, it's like a flower, hidden depths will open up. 01:21:04.034 --> 01:21:04.895 So get voting. 01:21:04.976 --> 01:21:09.102 You can text us, either text us at number 64046, 01:21:12.265 --> 01:21:13.106 64046 is the text. 01:21:13.606 --> 01:21:16.107 You text the name Adam or Joe, depending on which one you want to vote for. 01:21:16.167 --> 01:21:16.427 Yeah. 01:21:16.867 --> 01:21:19.909 And that's just for the remainder of this program. 01:21:20.249 --> 01:21:24.731 If you're voting during the week, email AdamandJoe. 01:21:24.771 --> 01:21:29.693 That's AdamandJoe.6music at bbc.co.uk. 01:21:29.713 --> 01:21:33.735 And of course, if you're listening again throughout the week, that's the case for you as well. 01:21:33.775 --> 01:21:35.476 If you want to vote, you can. 01:21:35.516 --> 01:21:38.557 You can vote right up until Saturday morning, pretty much. 01:21:38.939 --> 01:21:39.840 When do the votes close? 01:21:39.860 --> 01:21:41.441 We don't want to get into any kind of scandal. 01:21:41.461 --> 01:21:43.083 Uh, Saturday morning. 01:21:43.203 --> 01:21:44.224 Saturday morning, okay. 01:21:44.364 --> 01:21:47.267 They're collated just before the show on Saturday morning. 01:21:47.407 --> 01:21:47.708 Okay, see? 01:21:47.728 --> 01:21:48.889 By a team of collators. 01:21:49.449 --> 01:21:49.609 Mmm. 01:21:50.290 --> 01:21:51.131 Or, yeah, what? 01:21:51.771 --> 01:21:55.295 My... Here's Cajun dance party with, uh, Amelie. 01:21:55.395 --> 01:21:56.576 No, either way, is it? 01:21:56.596 --> 01:21:58.298 No, no, you're right, you're right, sorry. 01:21:58.438 --> 01:21:59.959 I'm really sorry, man, I'm sorry. 01:22:00.059 --> 01:22:00.480 I'm sorry. 01:22:00.700 --> 01:22:02.321 Cajun dance party with amalets. 01:22:02.782 --> 01:22:03.903 They're an English five piece. 01:22:03.923 --> 01:22:06.445 They're all still in the sixth form according to these notes. 01:22:06.485 --> 01:22:09.147 That could be slightly outdated now, but they're certainly very young. 01:22:09.787 --> 01:22:10.888 So if you like them, good for you. 01:22:10.928 --> 01:22:15.151 You're you're helping out the kids, helping out the little if you didn't like them, then give them a break. 01:22:15.171 --> 01:22:16.612 They're tiny little kids. 01:22:16.633 --> 01:22:17.313 What are you doing? 01:22:17.353 --> 01:22:26.520 Honestly, there was I was watching that program that Nigel Godrich does that you were at one stage going to present until they decided that would be a dreadful idea from the base. 01:22:26.560 --> 01:22:27.921 It's really good from the base. 01:22:27.941 --> 01:22:28.162 Yeah. 01:22:28.182 --> 01:22:28.402 Yeah. 01:22:28.522 --> 01:22:29.783 It's what cable channel is it on? 01:22:30.143 --> 01:22:31.644 It's on their Arts channel, isn't it? 01:22:31.684 --> 01:22:32.004 Sky Arts? 01:22:32.044 --> 01:22:33.904 Yeah, if you've missed it, listeners, you should check it out. 01:22:33.964 --> 01:22:37.245 It's one of the best, you know, pure music shows on telly. 01:22:37.425 --> 01:22:38.646 It's got no presenters at all. 01:22:38.706 --> 01:22:42.787 It's just bands performing in this sort of underground studio space. 01:22:42.827 --> 01:22:43.767 It's really well shot. 01:22:44.228 --> 01:22:46.648 Very kind of unpretentious and really good. 01:22:47.129 --> 01:22:49.549 And there was a band on there the other day. 01:22:49.569 --> 01:22:51.730 I can't work out what they're called. 01:22:52.270 --> 01:22:54.611 But their drummer was... He looked about 10. 01:22:55.051 --> 01:22:55.291 Right. 01:22:55.511 --> 01:22:56.352 Curly blonde hair. 01:22:56.372 --> 01:22:57.132 Do you know who that is? 01:22:57.152 --> 01:22:57.192 No. 01:22:58.052 --> 01:23:02.213 thrashing away amazingly at the drums and they had a slightly Asian looking girl singer. 01:23:02.694 --> 01:23:04.374 Oh wait, maybe it was a three piece. 01:23:04.734 --> 01:23:05.775 It could have been Deerhoof. 01:23:06.755 --> 01:23:07.595 Was it Deerhoof? 01:23:07.755 --> 01:23:09.876 No, because I saw Deerhoof at the Royal Festival. 01:23:09.896 --> 01:23:12.717 They were brilliant supporting the super furry animals. 01:23:12.737 --> 01:23:13.497 They were fantastic. 01:23:13.777 --> 01:23:15.458 They had a fantastic drummer as well. 01:23:15.738 --> 01:23:19.799 He just had one cymbal and a drum and he was making all kinds of racket out of it. 01:23:19.819 --> 01:23:20.720 It was brilliant. 01:23:20.780 --> 01:23:21.980 Maybe no, they're older than that. 01:23:22.260 --> 01:23:23.020 Yeah, I don't know. 01:23:23.060 --> 01:23:23.741 I'd be interested to know. 01:23:23.761 --> 01:23:27.542 But the general point of that blurbl was that you should check out From the 01:23:27.602 --> 01:23:28.022 Basement. 01:23:28.242 --> 01:23:33.044 From The Basement, I believe I was one of the people that came up with that title. 01:23:33.205 --> 01:23:33.525 Really? 01:23:33.725 --> 01:23:35.285 Well, I originally suggested The Basement. 01:23:35.305 --> 01:23:37.226 I hate the title, but the show's brilliant. 01:23:37.747 --> 01:23:45.150 Basement tapes I suggested, but Nigel said no because it'll be too much like the Bob Dylan album and people won't be able to get the association out of their head. 01:23:45.790 --> 01:23:48.992 And then maybe our friend Garth came up with From The Basement, in fact. 01:23:49.052 --> 01:23:49.612 It's very good. 01:23:49.672 --> 01:23:51.953 That was before we got edged out of the whole project. 01:23:52.393 --> 01:23:52.753 I know. 01:23:53.194 --> 01:23:54.094 Better than the Holland. 01:23:55.035 --> 01:23:56.356 Who I find a little bit grating. 01:23:56.376 --> 01:23:57.237 I don't know, it's just me. 01:23:57.277 --> 01:23:58.137 Great bands on there. 01:23:58.358 --> 01:23:59.979 But Holland just looks tired with the gig. 01:24:00.239 --> 01:24:00.859 He looks bored. 01:24:01.240 --> 01:24:03.822 Well, he's got too much of an editorial policy on there. 01:24:03.962 --> 01:24:04.462 What do you think? 01:24:04.522 --> 01:24:06.023 Yeah, it's too... Does he vet the bands? 01:24:06.404 --> 01:24:16.851 Well, he's... I mean... Do you have to... Even though it's not all the bands aren't to his taste, there's still very much a kind of editorial through-line on that show, even though they've got such a wide, hmm, ranging thing, you know what I mean? 01:24:16.871 --> 01:24:18.873 Sometimes when they jam together, the noise is awful. 01:24:18.973 --> 01:24:21.516 It's almost like you want a certain type of music. 01:24:21.536 --> 01:24:28.404 You don't want such a wide variety of choice sometimes, you know, because you always feel with duels that you have to switch off for a few minutes sometimes. 01:24:28.424 --> 01:24:32.608 Yeah, I don't know what you think, listeners, but From the Basement is a bit more streamlined. 01:24:32.649 --> 01:24:36.453 Certainly, I would say it would be more to the taste of your average six-music listener. 01:24:36.853 --> 01:24:39.594 Even though there probably isn't such a thing as the average leg's music lesson. 01:24:39.634 --> 01:24:40.114 No, no. 01:24:41.094 --> 01:24:43.635 They're all lesbians and gays and policemen. 01:24:43.935 --> 01:24:45.615 You're obsessed with lesbians, gays and policemen. 01:24:45.635 --> 01:24:46.175 It's just a call back. 01:24:46.715 --> 01:24:48.976 Now, this is a track that you chose show. 01:24:49.316 --> 01:24:53.337 Oh yeah, this is from a film that I saw over the Christmas period. 01:24:53.617 --> 01:24:55.097 I saw this film in Paris. 01:24:55.937 --> 01:24:57.198 I went to Paris before Christmas. 01:24:57.218 --> 01:24:58.438 I love Paris. 01:24:58.458 --> 01:25:00.538 That's my favorite city. 01:25:01.539 --> 01:25:02.139 I live there. 01:25:02.979 --> 01:25:03.659 I am French! 01:25:03.719 --> 01:25:04.519 Who used to be French's? 01:25:04.539 --> 01:25:05.860 Oh, it's two words! 01:25:06.020 --> 01:25:06.660 Really? 01:25:06.980 --> 01:25:07.380 Oh, see? 01:25:07.540 --> 01:25:08.480 I did this thing right. 01:25:08.841 --> 01:25:09.741 Ah, fresh short story. 01:25:09.761 --> 01:25:10.941 A friend of mine bought a hat. 01:25:11.741 --> 01:25:12.241 Ah, he wore it. 01:25:12.341 --> 01:25:12.742 A chapeau? 01:25:12.902 --> 01:25:15.602 A chapeau, from a pretty magazine. 01:25:15.682 --> 01:25:17.123 Oh, yeah. 01:25:17.143 --> 01:25:19.203 That means from a little shop near the Pompidou Centre. 01:25:19.223 --> 01:25:20.003 Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. 01:25:20.023 --> 01:25:20.624 A touristy shop. 01:25:20.644 --> 01:25:21.324 He bought a hat. 01:25:21.864 --> 01:25:23.224 Thank me, Nuit Poutart. 01:25:23.704 --> 01:25:24.945 Five minutes later. 01:25:24.965 --> 01:25:25.585 Yes, yes. 01:25:25.765 --> 01:25:26.825 Le chapeau et cassé. 01:25:27.145 --> 01:25:28.786 Oh, the hat is broken! 01:25:28.966 --> 01:25:29.786 The hat broke! 01:25:30.146 --> 01:25:30.386 Yes. 01:25:30.406 --> 01:25:32.287 I had to go back and do the negotiation. 01:25:32.307 --> 01:25:33.008 With the hat man. 01:25:33.028 --> 01:25:33.968 Hat man, hat man John. 01:25:48.557 --> 01:25:50.198 Ah, so I had to speak in French. 01:25:50.598 --> 01:25:51.739 I said, monsieur, s'il vous plaît. 01:25:52.059 --> 01:25:54.440 Mon ami avais ashtait cette chapeau. 01:25:54.981 --> 01:25:56.582 My friend has built this hat. 01:25:57.362 --> 01:25:59.163 Ah, mais le chapeau avait cette. 01:25:59.303 --> 01:26:00.544 But the hat has broken. 01:26:01.164 --> 01:26:04.166 Es que c'est possible pour et chanje le chapeau. 01:26:04.286 --> 01:26:06.847 Is it possible to exchange the hat-ho? 01:26:07.147 --> 01:26:09.349 The man said, ah, he said, no. 01:26:09.369 --> 01:26:10.369 He said, nah, mate. 01:26:10.649 --> 01:26:11.450 Nah, he said it. 01:26:11.530 --> 01:26:12.730 The French equivalent of nah, mate. 01:26:12.750 --> 01:26:13.411 You've got to be kidding. 01:26:13.451 --> 01:26:14.692 Your English will never come back here. 01:26:14.732 --> 01:26:15.292 I don't give up. 01:26:16.212 --> 01:26:18.613 He was very rude and abrasive. 01:26:19.073 --> 01:26:21.614 Now, my French is limited, as you can tell. 01:26:22.034 --> 01:26:22.734 Be at O-level. 01:26:23.795 --> 01:26:36.479 I've got nothing between please exchange the hat and... So I went straight for... He looked at me, startled, laughed at me. 01:26:38.662 --> 01:26:41.683 I was all over the place with my, um, French arguing. 01:26:41.923 --> 01:26:42.243 Right. 01:26:42.263 --> 01:26:44.424 Uh, and in the end he called me, uh, Sarkozy. 01:26:44.945 --> 01:26:45.785 Sarkozy! 01:26:45.865 --> 01:26:51.907 Excuse me of being on the side of France's, you know, uh, riot police, uh, enforcing... Right. 01:26:51.927 --> 01:26:53.088 Basically saying you're a fascist. 01:26:53.128 --> 01:26:53.408 Yeah. 01:26:54.088 --> 01:26:54.288 Right. 01:26:54.308 --> 01:26:56.409 But then his mates stitched it back and mended it. 01:26:56.970 --> 01:26:57.070 Aww. 01:26:57.170 --> 01:26:58.431 It was all okay, don't look mad. 01:26:58.531 --> 01:27:00.652 It's nice, nice at the end of the day. 01:27:00.812 --> 01:27:03.834 Anyway, the film that I saw was called Paranoid Park, Gus Van Sant's new one. 01:27:03.854 --> 01:27:06.675 Now, a teen skater that kills a man and feels very guilty. 01:27:06.715 --> 01:27:07.035 Oh dear. 01:27:07.155 --> 01:27:07.756 And wanders around. 01:27:07.816 --> 01:27:08.276 I loved it. 01:27:08.416 --> 01:27:08.696 Yeah, good one. 01:27:08.716 --> 01:27:09.837 Extraordinary sound design. 01:27:10.237 --> 01:27:13.219 Ooh, people listening to Six Music Mutes didn't sound design. 01:27:13.319 --> 01:27:14.460 The year's most beautiful film. 01:27:14.480 --> 01:27:15.441 Very good sound design. 01:27:15.461 --> 01:27:15.801 Does it? 01:27:16.302 --> 01:27:17.122 It might be true. 01:27:17.683 --> 01:27:18.844 But this is a track he uses in it. 01:27:18.864 --> 01:27:20.285 This is Elliot Smith with Angelis. 01:27:20.605 --> 01:27:22.146 That was Elliot Smith with Angelis. 01:27:22.606 --> 01:27:23.527 That's it for this week. 01:27:23.587 --> 01:27:24.948 Thanks a lot for listening, everybody. 01:27:25.288 --> 01:27:27.090 It's a very long fade-in to our track there. 01:27:27.130 --> 01:27:28.211 I like a nice long fade-in. 01:27:28.231 --> 01:27:34.235 It's good to play the whole fade-in as well, not like chop it up like other less, you know, less good shows might do. 01:27:34.255 --> 01:27:35.996 Less tall DJ's might do. 01:27:36.016 --> 01:27:36.657 Yeah, yeah. 01:27:37.017 --> 01:27:40.900 No, it's nice, you know, you don't want to talk right the way up to where the singing starts. 01:27:40.920 --> 01:27:43.101 Because you lose all, uh, maloness. 01:27:43.361 --> 01:27:44.122 Yeah, there we go. 01:27:44.142 --> 01:27:45.363 It's mellowed me right out now. 01:27:45.383 --> 01:27:48.284 Thanks for everybody who's texted and emailed as well this week. 01:27:48.485 --> 01:27:50.146 And keep those votes for Song Wars coming in. 01:27:50.186 --> 01:27:51.186 Don't forget to vote Joe. 01:27:51.226 --> 01:27:52.107 Just text Joe to 64046. 01:27:52.547 --> 01:27:55.409 Or you can text Adam to 6406. 01:27:55.689 --> 01:27:56.490 Or you can, of course... 01:27:58.391 --> 01:28:00.432 You can, of course, email that's absolutely correct. 01:28:00.452 --> 01:28:01.173 Don't bother to do it. 01:28:01.193 --> 01:28:02.093 Don't bother to do it. 01:28:02.113 --> 01:28:05.175 E-mail Joe to Adam and Joe.6music at bbc.co.uk. 01:28:05.235 --> 01:28:09.198 And of course, don't forget, you can listen again to this show on the BBC's website. 01:28:09.438 --> 01:28:11.379 It's very easy and enjoyable thing to do. 01:28:12.060 --> 01:28:14.882 And we're going to sort the podcast situation out, listeners. 01:28:14.922 --> 01:28:18.084 I know it's taken us a long time to get round to it, but we're still settling in here. 01:28:18.104 --> 01:28:19.104 We're banking material. 01:28:19.424 --> 01:28:20.625 Yeah, we're banking material. 01:28:21.246 --> 01:28:22.266 It's all going to be exciting. 01:28:22.286 --> 01:28:23.347 I think there's even going to be like 01:28:23.507 --> 01:28:24.828 two types of podcasts. 01:28:24.848 --> 01:28:29.890 There'll be like a regular one that's a digest of each week's show, you know, like a little condensed version. 01:28:30.271 --> 01:28:36.094 And then me and Joe are really gonna do our best to do one that's especially constructive with kind of... A family one and a blue one. 01:28:36.194 --> 01:28:38.855 A little bit of a blue one, yeah, kind of Derek and Clive one. 01:28:39.695 --> 01:28:40.376 Not that extreme. 01:28:40.696 --> 01:28:42.877 But anyway, we'll let you know what's happening as and when. 01:28:43.157 --> 01:28:48.660 Liz Kershaw is coming up very shortly, ladies and gentlemen, but for now we're gonna leave you with Kate Nash. 01:28:49.040 --> 01:28:51.201 Happy New Year, lots of love, have a great week. 01:28:51.642 --> 01:28:52.342 I love you, bye!